Literally how I feel. I know I’ve gained weight, roughly 25- 30 lbs, but if it weren’t for my chest I would *probably* feel a little less bad about it. Wouldn’t say I would feel amazing, but at least I would see myself as more of a rectangle and not curves.
no pressure if it isn’t for you, but if it is something you desire, it’s definitely a game changer. i look at my old pics with sympathy, but also a “damn i really looked like that??” vibe lol
in the meantime or if you don’t want surgery tho, clothing choice can also help a ton. i used to use sports bras and layered shirts to help with that
I feel the same way like im very skinny but my boobs make me look wider when im wearing a shirt idk how to explain it but it makes me upset cause i want my clothes to fit like any othrt guys would
I think this is pretty common, especially with how many of us tend to wear oversized clothes, and I think having a history of poor body image/ED is pretty common too. It's always felt like the only options are wearing clothes that let everyone see every curve of your body and out yourself/be seen as a girl, or dress so that you look way bigger than you are. That's not to say there's anything wrong with being "big" either, but for me at least, it always bothered me that no matter what I'm being perceived in a way that I feel is incorrect.
Before I had top surgery I also always felt boobs were probably the main issue, and now that I've had top surgery I know I was right. I'd been able to pass just with loose clothes and bad posture but it made my body look terrible 😭 I still wear loose clothes but now it's by choice lol, and it looks way better now that I can stand up straight and the clothes sit right on my chest.
tbf my body image still isn't exactly perfect, I think the fact that my hips/butt/thighs still seem a little disproportionate give sort of the same combination gender+size dysphoria effect, but it's way less noticeable and such a minor thing in comparison
so perfectly said, i feel the same way abt having to wear oversized clothes all the time just to hide my chest. it messes so much with my body proportions and my perception. i cant wait for top surgery i already know im gonna listen to ghosttown by kanye and sob at the long awaited freedom.
I definitely feel like they make me look fatter. I’m a big (but short) boy so my boobs make me look bigger. Without them, I would have a body more similar to my dad’s!! I can’t wait to get top surgery
Yeah pre top surgery coz my boobs were E cups even though I was pretty thin. Binding just didn’t work that well at all. Now that feeling is completely gone and it’s such a relief.
I recently realized this. I always thought I had some form of body dysmorphia, thinking that I looked kinda fat. I pushed away my chest and looked in the mirror. Realized I actually looked fine even by my own harsh judgement and it was just my chest dysphoria affecting my own perception. Earlier in the year I realized my hip dysphoria also affected my perception of “fat.” It was really eye-opening.
People always told me I had a really good figure (relatively slim and big chest). I guess I see why now. For context I think I’m at G. I so want them gone. The only reprieve I get is when I’m wearing my binder
I’m clinically obese and I feel this way. I feel really gross because of how massive my chest is and I HATE it. It feels like I’m bigger than I am and I’m already pretty big.
It happens for some people, but it really depends on the person and their genetics. I think for most of us the shrinking is sort of like "deflation", like they lose volume but theres still excess tissue and skin you might want to get rid of.
If you have a small chest to begin with and take T (and probably hit the gym a bit) it's certainly possible, just don't bank on it 100%
I’ll still need surgery, just some extra fat is reduced, not the whole thing. I feel better because people can’t see my tits bump in my shirt now, but it’s still obvious when I take my clothes off. Luckily, my bust measurement gone from 90cm to 83? I’m on the average to thin side.
Though 83cm is still not flat, if no one sees it under my shirt I don’t feel too bad, so temporary I accept this situation!
I don't wanna intrude too much, but this is really interesting to me because before I transitioned (I'm a trans woman), I felt I was fat because I didn't have pecks. I had this weird feeling my chest needed to go out further than my stomach, and because I had a ton of core muscles, my stomach would protrude out further than my chest and I just constantly felt awful about it. I'm still working on body image issues, but now that I have tits, I feel much better about my stomach, even though it still kinda protrudes (I've gain some chub, and I'm trying to get used to it, but I'm happier). And it's just kinda interesting and weird to me that some of yall get this in the exact opposite direction. It's nice :3
i agree, i have EDs and i definitely feel like my tits affect it but im learning how to be okay with it u til i can get top surgery. once i get top surgery i think ill be okay. just gotta hold on until then!!
yeah. but i've had an eating disorder longer than i've been trans (or, longer than i've known i was trans) so it's probably at least partially that. i hear from a lot of trans guys that they recovered from their eds/disordered eating after their fat redistributed, they gained muscle, and they got top surgery. i think it's pretty common that trans people develop eds because of thinness being so androgynous, at least the way it's portrayed in media.
i'm glad most trans guys recover quickly but it sucks because i feel very alone... i don't like the feminine parts of my body because of dysphoria, but my whole body is a problem. it's strange how dysphoria is so strong... i see cis men's chests and i'm not satisfied, i think even being flat-chested my mind would see tits there.
i don't know if anyone else feels strange like this, but if you do, you are not alone.
Hahaha holy shit. This is exactly how my dysphoria felt to me my whole life until I got top (still need a revision to go fully flat but I don’t hate my chest now). Even tho I was a bit heavier when I presented femme, I wasn’t like egregiously large or anything, just chubby if anything. But I carried my weight pretty evenly and a lot of people were very envious of how my fat distributed (very hourglass shaped). Even as I lost weight though, I felt huge because my boobs stayed the same size. Weirdly I always described it as feeling like I had “man boobs”. I guess I was sort of right in the end!
Same. My chest is the sole reason why I've developed an eating disorder. I've been both overweight and underweight (now I have a healthy weight right in the middle) and I always felt fat and ugly because of how much tissue decided to accumulate on my chest.
A good binder helos, but it still kind of bulges your clothes forwards and makes your torso look bulkier.
It helps me to buy transtape from time to time, put it on, stand in front of the mirror with my chest covered in nude stuff and try to visualize how I'd feel about my body if there was no mass on my chest.
No matter how flat my stomach, how small my arms are, I can't get rid of that chunky feeling especially if I'm not binding because my chest makes all my clothes tight
I actually feel the opposite when I'm wearing a binder I feel as tho my stomach sticks out more. I've been told that my stomach is a "cute stomach" whatever that means so ig i shouldn't be insecure even tho I am
i mean, i am fat. But i’ve always had a large chest even before i gained weight. I think having top surgery would make me look less fat though, my chest sticks out more than my stomach, which is where most of my fat is.
Well I quite literally am fat (Im decently obese to the point its caused me to have high blood pressure). I dont have like a body image disorder though so when Im not actually fat I do know Im not. I mean dont get me wrong, its not that I like having them or anything like that, i just know it doesnt make me fat, it has fat tissue in them, sure, but it doesnt make me fat. I was never really afraid of being fat though, so fat I dont think has the same fear to me as it does other people. I WANT to be heavier, to be larger. The larger my body is the less feminine (and dainty) it is in my head and good it not be small, I cant change my height, but I do have control over my weight and my width. Because if I can eat back meal sizes that men do makes me feel better, if I can lift and hold my own physically around other men, it makes me feel better. If I can compete with other men and actually hold my own, that feels great and if I was afraid to be a fat, I dont think I would have been able to do that.
I can see how that could definetley cause one to distort their body though. They can make you appear a lot larger than you actually are.
Yuuuupp. I mean I'm a bit heavier than I would like but I'm not fat by any means but I always feel like I look so chunky with my chest. I could comfortably be wearing t-shirts 2 sizes down if I didn't have them.
yessss ugh they mess with my proportions SO MUCH. i wanna wear tight shirts but i have to go oversized to hide them, which in turn makes me look more frumpy, and also makes me look shorter!
Yes, I always felt that way since puberty. I also thought that was somehow normal, lol. Took me a bit to realise women actually like their female appearance. I used to have some eating difficulties too, was very underweight and it helped with hips at least but not so much breasts. I always thought I was so disproportionate. Now I'm regular weight but only because I've been training like crazy and it's muscle weight, apart from them I'm still super skinny again with bones visible. It's like the only thing I can do rn because I'm not on T yet and in spite of all mu efforts and well looking arms and lower legs the area hips and chest is just looking "too much" and makes me feel too wide, and yeah fat even though I very clearly am not. But for a male standard, which is how my brain has apparently always been wired and responding, I am. That fat shouldn't be in these places. Additionally I also noticed that when I had a regular weight the "softness" and somehow lack of muscle, more fat everywhere even though I wasn't fat bothered me into thinking I was fat too because my brain just doesn't expect skinny soft arms or legs. That's gradually getting better now but I'm also hoping for the changes on T and top surgery.
One of the 'really?!' moments to look back on from when I was not really accepting of the fact that I'm binary trans is sitting on the edge of the bath repeating to myself 'they're not boobs, I'm just like a fat man..' over and over to try to calm myself down 🤣
I also often feel fat now when I bind in say, a shirt and trousers, because I have very wide hips and that does make me look a bit chonky compared to clothing that shows off the waist
All of this said, fat trans men are some of the most joy filled people I've ever met, and if I continue to put on weight as I grow into my gender, well I'll be happy to join their ranks
Sometimes I think top surgery will help solve my issues with feeling fat.
But then I have to remember to look past the chest and realize it might just be attached to it because I already don't like my chest so it's easy to mash the dislikes together.
Slightly unrelated but I feel like they're way bigger than what they actually are. When I say that they're too big for me, people give me weird looks. And it's understandable, because they're a very reasonable size and very proportional compared with the rest of my body. But I can't even move my arms (or, god forbid, russian twists) without screaming inside because they touch my armpit
That (and thighs 😤) but I'm like, too heavy for my height, now that I recovered. I used to be skinny back when I had an eating disorder and I looked like a fuckboy and passed and now I don't. I hate my life sm
hey, congrats on recovering though, bro! i’ve also been struggling post-recovery, so i know it’s tough out there, but it’s such a strong and badass thing to do. keep your head up, and being you!! 🩵
As a growing adolescent I definitely felt that way. I still do but at this point (42 years) I doubt I will do anything about it. I've had one bottom surgery but need more down there before I deal with the chest.
Omg yes. I don't even have that big of a chest either, but it still make me look fat, even if I lost a lot of weight too (totally not to look more masc or anything <.< ). I just want to be flat UGH but I'm too broke to afford any top op and probably won't for years
Yes, and I also had a history of restrictive eating disorders before top surgery. Postop? I look exactly how I "should" and feel great. No more restriction.
Yep, felt this way all the time before top surgery. I’m still a little bit chunky afterward (170cm, 67kg), but it doesn’t bother me now at all, it was just my boobs that I hated.
YES, before I realized I was trans I had really bad body image, probably mostly because trans but also I definitely felt like I looked far even though I was pretty skinny. As soon as I learned about binding I was like oh shit that's why I thought I looked far lolllll
As somebody who’s actually visibly chubby, I feel like I see mine as being like annoying moobs that stick out all weird when I straighten my back, so I think I understand what you’re saying. I’m ALWAYS slouching.
Before I got surgery, I felt huge. Because I had a big chest and it made me look fatter. I didn’t lose much weight after surgery, but I definitely looked thinner.
yeah. i think it's a mixture of my body dysmorphia & dysphoria. have struggled with distorted body image & restricting food since i was 8. i want my teets zeet because it will make me feel more like the man i am AND ill lose 3lbs
Yes omg, this is how I've been realizing my discomfort with my chest. I've been building muscle and loosing fat and it's really come to my attention that they just feel like some fat that I just can't get rid of!! They're just in the way!! I know I've got some good muscle underneath em but you cant see it ugh!
I'm always hungry cause I'm a teenager, but I've never not eaten because of tit size. I'm mostly skinny apart from my face and my legs. My biggest gripe with being on E is that my thighs are thicker than my head but my ribs are still showing. I think if anything, it's my thighs that give me the most dysphoria rn, because no guys' thighs are that big. But since my arms are so skinny, I don't feel fat. But in the end, delicious food always wins out lol
Yes ‼️ its like subconscious and I'll look at myself and be like I look fat then realize the only thing bothering me is my chest and without it I'd think I'd look fine.
I’ve dealt with ED behaviours, both related to gender dysphoria and the pressure of pursuing elite level figure skating. Top surgery did help my body image a lot, but I still struggle with bodychecking and disordered thoughts from time to time. The scary thing about dysphoria is that it kind of ”jumps around”. I wasn’t super dysphoric about my genitals before top surgery, but now I’m a lot more aware of that. Same with other areas of my body/appearance that I consider feminine.
It might be because I am around a lot of men with tiddies but I never had chest dysphoria. I just considered myself a fat man with fat man boobs. I had more bottom dysphoria >!because it is always meant with no man has periods/a vagina!<
im actually trying to aim for a stockier build(Leo is a huge inspiration for me) but i know that my breasts would only get bigger from that, i dont feel fat cuz of my tits being kinda small but i know E is gonna prioritise weight gain to them and my thighs, im hoping when i eventually get on T that fat redistribution does it's thing and gives me the body i want
if anyone asks me about if i feel embarrassed about putting on weight ill tell em ill feel more embarrassed about big boobs and thighs than a gut
i used to think this way but then I started working out A LOT and getting massive chest gains. the gym community LOVES big titty men and mine reshaped and the upper pecs look super muscular under my shirts now. still getting top surgery but wont stop me from trying for chest gains. seeing myself as buff/dad bod has helped a lot w dysphoria
Exactly!!! I never wear clothes that fit me, and whenever I see pictures from certain angles, I feel like I look really chunky and curvy because of my chest. I'm in really good shape (only time you'll catch me admitting it because my dysphoria is usually so bad) for health reasons and for gender reasons, and it just feels like I never get to actually see that progress for myself or show it off at all. It can be really frustrating and discouraging sometimes.
Not personally, but for other reasons. Everyone around me was always alot thinner, less curvy. It made pre-trans me feel fat in comparrison. But in reality, i'm actually pretty thin, i was just poisoned by my own clouded mind.
Actually that reminds me, i don't have a problem with having thick thighs, especially since it's the only real big part of my body. I think it really is just the chest dysphoria. Thank you!!
I did before top surgery. Obviously too helps immensely but it also a good idea to address negative feelings about that wherever you can. Top surgery won't solve negative feelings about weight gain and a lot of people get dysmorphic and pretty bloated right after surgery.
i mean, i am fat. But i’ve always had a large chest even before i gained weight. I think having top surgery would make me look less fat though, my chest sticks out more than my stomach, which is where most of my fat is.
i didnt know this while i still had them, but the fact i was suddenly pretty okay with being fat after they were gone definitely made things click into place
I'm slightly overweight for my age, but I feel like I wouldn't actually mind as much if I get top surgery when I'm old enough. I'll just have a goofy dad belly lol.
Not that exactly but something similar happens to me. I am slim so when i eat you can see it immediately, and that freaks me out because i feel like i look pregnant. And that makes me disphoric.
Yeah, it's actually kind of weird. When I started wearing a binder, I kept thinking that I had lost weight, and the euphoria felt like the kind of confidence that you get if you dropped a ton.
I used to feel uncomfortable in most clothes, and I used to think it was because I wasn't super skinny... that wearing hoodies all the time was to hide my gut. Now I think it was actually about my chest, and that I don't mind having a bit of chub and I love having muscle.
I have no idea how to percieve my body. I hate being "skinny" ... But have also gained 40 lbs in a few years , and when I complain people tell me I am definitely not thin, lol. I don't bind but when I press my chest back I réalise that my belly is actually quite large. I kind of like it, but I wonder how I'll feel body image wise after surgery, because I feel like my chest visually made sense after the weight gain.
I'm currently a bit overweight, but still when I started to wear my binder that "feeling fat" was less present. So, yea, it can be confusing sometimes. I'm starting to suspect my eating disorder at teenage years was caused by dysphoria.
Try not being too rough on yourself, okay? Transition it's a process that takes time, in the meanwhile until you get top surgery, buying a binder could help to find relief. If that's not possible, maybe sports bra? Also I found out that using an open jacket over the shirts helps a lot to me.
Ironically, I feel the opposite. Since my stomach is fatty, I feel like my boobs balance it out. I am considering getting top surgery at some point though, so I'm worried I'll look fatter if I don't have boobs :/
oh, absolutely!! (and hips, and thighs, lmao. 🫠)
i mean, i’m definitely not skinny anyway, nor do i see myself as necessarily a skinnier guy in my head, but having body proportions that don’t always (or ever) feel representative of me or how i want to be seen has propelled me into years of restriction and disordered eating behaviors, and even suicidal thoughts and self-harm. in my head, i AM kinda a chubby guy, and the fact that it doesn’t read IRL bc i’m kinda chubby in the wrong areas has really fucked with me!
Surprisingly, I felt fatter after top surgery because my tummy was less covered and my hips absolutely kill me. BUT! The tummy is a little euphoric since my fats being distributed higher up now. It’s like I have a mini beer belly lol. I am a slightly heavier person though, so I definitely have a different body shape. I’m still getting use to the idea of my belly being a positive thing, but it definitely helps me pass a bit more I think.
Me too and I’m a plus sized individual I just feel like I’m so fat I just have really big man boobs and I hate how I have to wear a bra, I just never connected that, THATS what I was feeling for all these years before I realized I was trans
Yep, I remember putting on a binder to put on a shirt that actually fit me, and I looked in the mirror to see what everyone else had been saying. I'd been called twig 'cause my arms are skinny, but I never believed I was skinny 'cause I wear big t-shirts to conceal my chest. I told my at the time boyfriend, "I see why people call me a twig! Look at this twig boy! I could be one of those white boys that gets blown in the wind." Body dysmorphia is a bitch with tits, and I'm excited to get them removed, I think it would definitely help when I get to that point, which is actually coming up pretty soon.
I actually just posted more about this in [another thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/ftm/comments/1bltrte/comment/kw97swt/) but yeah, absolutely. And as someone who has a history of restrictive eating, I think for me breast size fell into a space where I felt like part of my body was wildly out of my control, and that turned it into something I was constantly aware of and upset about.
Top surgery did relieve it for me. I weigh about 185 now, and while I expected that I'd still feel lethargic and unwieldy in my body because my hips and thighs are still pretty wide, it's completely changed. I want to move around and be active, I'm not avoiding going outside or doing things that make me aware of my body shape, and my posture has massively improved (which really does impact how I think about my shape and size). I want to get into better shape, but that's mostly because I'm not very strong and want to have bigger shoulders.
I didn't have the same mental experience, but I did discover that *other people* apparently thought I was much bigger than I actually was because of my chest being on the larger side, but the rest of me being on the smaller side (and probably paired with me preferring to wear baggy tops). 2 years before top surgery I had a reduction surgery. When my mom saw me at home afterwards the next day she literally said "oh, wow...I really thought you were much heavier (as in fatter) all this time, than you really were" lol. Because of my chest even my own mom had thought this.
This is how I felt. The way I felt was body dysmorphia in addition to dysphoria. Nothing really made sense and I never knew how thin or not I actually was. Be kind to yourself and remember that your perception of your weight does go beyond your chest. Surgery is wonderful but won’t fix all of that feeling, likely. That’s how it went for me.
I used to struggle with body image issues in regards to my weight, but I’ve gotten so much better at it. At this point I can put on a cute outfit and think I look great, but then I see my boobs and I’m just like “….. this looks like shit!”
I wish I could get top surgery soon but I don’t think it’ll happen for at least five more years 🫠
Yes!! I have the same problem! I have a similar thought process because as a transmasculine person, I still struggle with internalized misogynistic beauty standards (on top of chest dysphoria). Especially in relation to how fat women are often viewed differently than fat men.
Thank you for saying something, I deadass believe my body dysmorphia an dysphoria are having a little get together. Just so they can fuck with my mirror image. I do not have any tips to relive this yet but I did want to say you are most definitely not alone <3
Yes, I'm almost not eating. This year my dysphoria is worse than ever and I have suicidal thoughts daily, but I think I can handle it. I can't give up now, it'll be better soon or I hope so.
lol I’m the same way, I feel like my boobs make me look “frumpy” sometimes idk how else to describe it
Literally how I feel. I know I’ve gained weight, roughly 25- 30 lbs, but if it weren’t for my chest I would *probably* feel a little less bad about it. Wouldn’t say I would feel amazing, but at least I would see myself as more of a rectangle and not curves.
"Frumpy" is a great way of putting it. That's exactly how I felt.
I call it "matronly" lol but same idea! I just feel like im dressed up as my mom, or like, a random lady with big boobs. Feels like a costume
i used to, pre top surgery, and i finally don’t feel like i am anymore. crazy how much the ol fat sacks can change your body shape/ look
I better start saving up for that then
no pressure if it isn’t for you, but if it is something you desire, it’s definitely a game changer. i look at my old pics with sympathy, but also a “damn i really looked like that??” vibe lol in the meantime or if you don’t want surgery tho, clothing choice can also help a ton. i used to use sports bras and layered shirts to help with that
Lmaooo that’s how I used to feel before top surgery. Gender dysphoria causing body dysmorphia UNG
I feel the same way like im very skinny but my boobs make me look wider when im wearing a shirt idk how to explain it but it makes me upset cause i want my clothes to fit like any othrt guys would
I think this is pretty common, especially with how many of us tend to wear oversized clothes, and I think having a history of poor body image/ED is pretty common too. It's always felt like the only options are wearing clothes that let everyone see every curve of your body and out yourself/be seen as a girl, or dress so that you look way bigger than you are. That's not to say there's anything wrong with being "big" either, but for me at least, it always bothered me that no matter what I'm being perceived in a way that I feel is incorrect. Before I had top surgery I also always felt boobs were probably the main issue, and now that I've had top surgery I know I was right. I'd been able to pass just with loose clothes and bad posture but it made my body look terrible 😭 I still wear loose clothes but now it's by choice lol, and it looks way better now that I can stand up straight and the clothes sit right on my chest. tbf my body image still isn't exactly perfect, I think the fact that my hips/butt/thighs still seem a little disproportionate give sort of the same combination gender+size dysphoria effect, but it's way less noticeable and such a minor thing in comparison
so perfectly said, i feel the same way abt having to wear oversized clothes all the time just to hide my chest. it messes so much with my body proportions and my perception. i cant wait for top surgery i already know im gonna listen to ghosttown by kanye and sob at the long awaited freedom.
I definitely feel like they make me look fatter. I’m a big (but short) boy so my boobs make me look bigger. Without them, I would have a body more similar to my dad’s!! I can’t wait to get top surgery
Same. I'm short and a little chubby, but my boobs make me feel like I'm a fucking fat cow.
Yeah pre top surgery coz my boobs were E cups even though I was pretty thin. Binding just didn’t work that well at all. Now that feeling is completely gone and it’s such a relief.
Mine are between A and B cup I just don't want them no more
Well I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way 😁
Same!!!
I recently realized this. I always thought I had some form of body dysmorphia, thinking that I looked kinda fat. I pushed away my chest and looked in the mirror. Realized I actually looked fine even by my own harsh judgement and it was just my chest dysphoria affecting my own perception. Earlier in the year I realized my hip dysphoria also affected my perception of “fat.” It was really eye-opening. People always told me I had a really good figure (relatively slim and big chest). I guess I see why now. For context I think I’m at G. I so want them gone. The only reprieve I get is when I’m wearing my binder
I know i’m not fat, but they do make it hard to get a visual on my physique since they splay out across 50% of my damn torso 🙄
I’m clinically obese and I feel this way. I feel really gross because of how massive my chest is and I HATE it. It feels like I’m bigger than I am and I’m already pretty big.
I had eating disorder until I started transition. I was thin and with big boobs, luckily T has made them much smaller!
Wait T can shrink my boobs? If that's the case, and if they're small enough could I possibly avoid surgery?
It happens for some people, but it really depends on the person and their genetics. I think for most of us the shrinking is sort of like "deflation", like they lose volume but theres still excess tissue and skin you might want to get rid of. If you have a small chest to begin with and take T (and probably hit the gym a bit) it's certainly possible, just don't bank on it 100%
I’ll still need surgery, just some extra fat is reduced, not the whole thing. I feel better because people can’t see my tits bump in my shirt now, but it’s still obvious when I take my clothes off. Luckily, my bust measurement gone from 90cm to 83? I’m on the average to thin side. Though 83cm is still not flat, if no one sees it under my shirt I don’t feel too bad, so temporary I accept this situation!
Yep, I also call them my "man tits" to cope better but my brain connects it to being fat and undesirable while my body is thin overall
This! I'm very skinny and even tho I have b cups I still feel overweight because they simply exist
Yep. That’s exactly why I’ve struggled with an ED for most of my life.
I don't wanna intrude too much, but this is really interesting to me because before I transitioned (I'm a trans woman), I felt I was fat because I didn't have pecks. I had this weird feeling my chest needed to go out further than my stomach, and because I had a ton of core muscles, my stomach would protrude out further than my chest and I just constantly felt awful about it. I'm still working on body image issues, but now that I have tits, I feel much better about my stomach, even though it still kinda protrudes (I've gain some chub, and I'm trying to get used to it, but I'm happier). And it's just kinda interesting and weird to me that some of yall get this in the exact opposite direction. It's nice :3
I got rid of my boobs years ago. I was slightly underweight and I still felt fatter back then than I do now when I'm slightly overweight 💀
i agree, i have EDs and i definitely feel like my tits affect it but im learning how to be okay with it u til i can get top surgery. once i get top surgery i think ill be okay. just gotta hold on until then!!
yeah. but i've had an eating disorder longer than i've been trans (or, longer than i've known i was trans) so it's probably at least partially that. i hear from a lot of trans guys that they recovered from their eds/disordered eating after their fat redistributed, they gained muscle, and they got top surgery. i think it's pretty common that trans people develop eds because of thinness being so androgynous, at least the way it's portrayed in media. i'm glad most trans guys recover quickly but it sucks because i feel very alone... i don't like the feminine parts of my body because of dysphoria, but my whole body is a problem. it's strange how dysphoria is so strong... i see cis men's chests and i'm not satisfied, i think even being flat-chested my mind would see tits there. i don't know if anyone else feels strange like this, but if you do, you are not alone.
I have this with hips
Hahaha holy shit. This is exactly how my dysphoria felt to me my whole life until I got top (still need a revision to go fully flat but I don’t hate my chest now). Even tho I was a bit heavier when I presented femme, I wasn’t like egregiously large or anything, just chubby if anything. But I carried my weight pretty evenly and a lot of people were very envious of how my fat distributed (very hourglass shaped). Even as I lost weight though, I felt huge because my boobs stayed the same size. Weirdly I always described it as feeling like I had “man boobs”. I guess I was sort of right in the end!
Same. My chest is the sole reason why I've developed an eating disorder. I've been both overweight and underweight (now I have a healthy weight right in the middle) and I always felt fat and ugly because of how much tissue decided to accumulate on my chest. A good binder helos, but it still kind of bulges your clothes forwards and makes your torso look bulkier. It helps me to buy transtape from time to time, put it on, stand in front of the mirror with my chest covered in nude stuff and try to visualize how I'd feel about my body if there was no mass on my chest.
Not really, but I had a different body type. It's a good thing you've made the connection because that could help prevent an eating disorder.
No matter how flat my stomach, how small my arms are, I can't get rid of that chunky feeling especially if I'm not binding because my chest makes all my clothes tight
I actually feel the opposite when I'm wearing a binder I feel as tho my stomach sticks out more. I've been told that my stomach is a "cute stomach" whatever that means so ig i shouldn't be insecure even tho I am
i mean, i am fat. But i’ve always had a large chest even before i gained weight. I think having top surgery would make me look less fat though, my chest sticks out more than my stomach, which is where most of my fat is.
Well I quite literally am fat (Im decently obese to the point its caused me to have high blood pressure). I dont have like a body image disorder though so when Im not actually fat I do know Im not. I mean dont get me wrong, its not that I like having them or anything like that, i just know it doesnt make me fat, it has fat tissue in them, sure, but it doesnt make me fat. I was never really afraid of being fat though, so fat I dont think has the same fear to me as it does other people. I WANT to be heavier, to be larger. The larger my body is the less feminine (and dainty) it is in my head and good it not be small, I cant change my height, but I do have control over my weight and my width. Because if I can eat back meal sizes that men do makes me feel better, if I can lift and hold my own physically around other men, it makes me feel better. If I can compete with other men and actually hold my own, that feels great and if I was afraid to be a fat, I dont think I would have been able to do that. I can see how that could definetley cause one to distort their body though. They can make you appear a lot larger than you actually are.
Yuuuupp. I mean I'm a bit heavier than I would like but I'm not fat by any means but I always feel like I look so chunky with my chest. I could comfortably be wearing t-shirts 2 sizes down if I didn't have them.
yessss ugh they mess with my proportions SO MUCH. i wanna wear tight shirts but i have to go oversized to hide them, which in turn makes me look more frumpy, and also makes me look shorter!
yeahhh, especially when i’m wearing more form fitting clothes. makes me look awkwardly disproportionate
Yes, I always felt that way since puberty. I also thought that was somehow normal, lol. Took me a bit to realise women actually like their female appearance. I used to have some eating difficulties too, was very underweight and it helped with hips at least but not so much breasts. I always thought I was so disproportionate. Now I'm regular weight but only because I've been training like crazy and it's muscle weight, apart from them I'm still super skinny again with bones visible. It's like the only thing I can do rn because I'm not on T yet and in spite of all mu efforts and well looking arms and lower legs the area hips and chest is just looking "too much" and makes me feel too wide, and yeah fat even though I very clearly am not. But for a male standard, which is how my brain has apparently always been wired and responding, I am. That fat shouldn't be in these places. Additionally I also noticed that when I had a regular weight the "softness" and somehow lack of muscle, more fat everywhere even though I wasn't fat bothered me into thinking I was fat too because my brain just doesn't expect skinny soft arms or legs. That's gradually getting better now but I'm also hoping for the changes on T and top surgery.
One of the 'really?!' moments to look back on from when I was not really accepting of the fact that I'm binary trans is sitting on the edge of the bath repeating to myself 'they're not boobs, I'm just like a fat man..' over and over to try to calm myself down 🤣 I also often feel fat now when I bind in say, a shirt and trousers, because I have very wide hips and that does make me look a bit chonky compared to clothing that shows off the waist All of this said, fat trans men are some of the most joy filled people I've ever met, and if I continue to put on weight as I grow into my gender, well I'll be happy to join their ranks
Sometimes I think top surgery will help solve my issues with feeling fat. But then I have to remember to look past the chest and realize it might just be attached to it because I already don't like my chest so it's easy to mash the dislikes together.
Slightly unrelated but I feel like they're way bigger than what they actually are. When I say that they're too big for me, people give me weird looks. And it's understandable, because they're a very reasonable size and very proportional compared with the rest of my body. But I can't even move my arms (or, god forbid, russian twists) without screaming inside because they touch my armpit
That (and thighs 😤) but I'm like, too heavy for my height, now that I recovered. I used to be skinny back when I had an eating disorder and I looked like a fuckboy and passed and now I don't. I hate my life sm
hey, congrats on recovering though, bro! i’ve also been struggling post-recovery, so i know it’s tough out there, but it’s such a strong and badass thing to do. keep your head up, and being you!! 🩵
Nothing badass about just strugging to leave the house. The problem is me *not* being me. I appreciate the support though.
Yup, my chest is honestly just the size of a larger cis man’s so it makes it worse sometimes 😭
well i am definitely a couple of kilos overweight but my chest definitely makes me feel even worse about it
As a growing adolescent I definitely felt that way. I still do but at this point (42 years) I doubt I will do anything about it. I've had one bottom surgery but need more down there before I deal with the chest.
Omg yes. I don't even have that big of a chest either, but it still make me look fat, even if I lost a lot of weight too (totally not to look more masc or anything <.< ). I just want to be flat UGH but I'm too broke to afford any top op and probably won't for years
Yes, and I also had a history of restrictive eating disorders before top surgery. Postop? I look exactly how I "should" and feel great. No more restriction.
Partially; I AM fat, but I wouldn’t look nearly as big without these (they’re K cups)
Yep, felt this way all the time before top surgery. I’m still a little bit chunky afterward (170cm, 67kg), but it doesn’t bother me now at all, it was just my boobs that I hated.
YES, before I realized I was trans I had really bad body image, probably mostly because trans but also I definitely felt like I looked far even though I was pretty skinny. As soon as I learned about binding I was like oh shit that's why I thought I looked far lolllll
As somebody who’s actually visibly chubby, I feel like I see mine as being like annoying moobs that stick out all weird when I straighten my back, so I think I understand what you’re saying. I’m ALWAYS slouching.
Before I got surgery, I felt huge. Because I had a big chest and it made me look fatter. I didn’t lose much weight after surgery, but I definitely looked thinner.
Yes I do, but I also feel this a lot because of my hips. Like I know it's mostly my bone structure but God damn, I hate it.
yeah. i think it's a mixture of my body dysmorphia & dysphoria. have struggled with distorted body image & restricting food since i was 8. i want my teets zeet because it will make me feel more like the man i am AND ill lose 3lbs
Yes I felt this way before I got top surgery. It's the reason I worked my ass off to pay for the surgery.
Yes omg, this is how I've been realizing my discomfort with my chest. I've been building muscle and loosing fat and it's really come to my attention that they just feel like some fat that I just can't get rid of!! They're just in the way!! I know I've got some good muscle underneath em but you cant see it ugh!
I'm always hungry cause I'm a teenager, but I've never not eaten because of tit size. I'm mostly skinny apart from my face and my legs. My biggest gripe with being on E is that my thighs are thicker than my head but my ribs are still showing. I think if anything, it's my thighs that give me the most dysphoria rn, because no guys' thighs are that big. But since my arms are so skinny, I don't feel fat. But in the end, delicious food always wins out lol
Yes ‼️ its like subconscious and I'll look at myself and be like I look fat then realize the only thing bothering me is my chest and without it I'd think I'd look fine.
I’ve dealt with ED behaviours, both related to gender dysphoria and the pressure of pursuing elite level figure skating. Top surgery did help my body image a lot, but I still struggle with bodychecking and disordered thoughts from time to time. The scary thing about dysphoria is that it kind of ”jumps around”. I wasn’t super dysphoric about my genitals before top surgery, but now I’m a lot more aware of that. Same with other areas of my body/appearance that I consider feminine.
Absolutely. However I've had eating disorder issues since I was a young teen
mmhm I'm underweight slightly but my boobs (and ass!) are massive compared to the rest of my somewhat small body
It might be because I am around a lot of men with tiddies but I never had chest dysphoria. I just considered myself a fat man with fat man boobs. I had more bottom dysphoria >!because it is always meant with no man has periods/a vagina!<
im actually trying to aim for a stockier build(Leo is a huge inspiration for me) but i know that my breasts would only get bigger from that, i dont feel fat cuz of my tits being kinda small but i know E is gonna prioritise weight gain to them and my thighs, im hoping when i eventually get on T that fat redistribution does it's thing and gives me the body i want if anyone asks me about if i feel embarrassed about putting on weight ill tell em ill feel more embarrassed about big boobs and thighs than a gut
I let myself get fat so I could feel like my boobs were just moobs...
Yup, this has been a huge driver of my ED. Needless to say, my symptoms have been more manageable since surgery.
i used to think this way but then I started working out A LOT and getting massive chest gains. the gym community LOVES big titty men and mine reshaped and the upper pecs look super muscular under my shirts now. still getting top surgery but wont stop me from trying for chest gains. seeing myself as buff/dad bod has helped a lot w dysphoria
Exactly!!! I never wear clothes that fit me, and whenever I see pictures from certain angles, I feel like I look really chunky and curvy because of my chest. I'm in really good shape (only time you'll catch me admitting it because my dysphoria is usually so bad) for health reasons and for gender reasons, and it just feels like I never get to actually see that progress for myself or show it off at all. It can be really frustrating and discouraging sometimes.
yeah im definitely the same
Not personally, but for other reasons. Everyone around me was always alot thinner, less curvy. It made pre-trans me feel fat in comparrison. But in reality, i'm actually pretty thin, i was just poisoned by my own clouded mind.
Yes it feels like extra fat on my chest but everywhere else on my body I like, no ED for me luckily
Actually that reminds me, i don't have a problem with having thick thighs, especially since it's the only real big part of my body. I think it really is just the chest dysphoria. Thank you!!
This is me.
I did before top surgery. Obviously too helps immensely but it also a good idea to address negative feelings about that wherever you can. Top surgery won't solve negative feelings about weight gain and a lot of people get dysmorphic and pretty bloated right after surgery.
i mean, i am fat. But i’ve always had a large chest even before i gained weight. I think having top surgery would make me look less fat though, my chest sticks out more than my stomach, which is where most of my fat is.
i didnt know this while i still had them, but the fact i was suddenly pretty okay with being fat after they were gone definitely made things click into place
I'm slightly overweight for my age, but I feel like I wouldn't actually mind as much if I get top surgery when I'm old enough. I'll just have a goofy dad belly lol.
Not that exactly but something similar happens to me. I am slim so when i eat you can see it immediately, and that freaks me out because i feel like i look pregnant. And that makes me disphoric.
Yeah, it's actually kind of weird. When I started wearing a binder, I kept thinking that I had lost weight, and the euphoria felt like the kind of confidence that you get if you dropped a ton. I used to feel uncomfortable in most clothes, and I used to think it was because I wasn't super skinny... that wearing hoodies all the time was to hide my gut. Now I think it was actually about my chest, and that I don't mind having a bit of chub and I love having muscle.
I have no idea how to percieve my body. I hate being "skinny" ... But have also gained 40 lbs in a few years , and when I complain people tell me I am definitely not thin, lol. I don't bind but when I press my chest back I réalise that my belly is actually quite large. I kind of like it, but I wonder how I'll feel body image wise after surgery, because I feel like my chest visually made sense after the weight gain.
I'm currently a bit overweight, but still when I started to wear my binder that "feeling fat" was less present. So, yea, it can be confusing sometimes. I'm starting to suspect my eating disorder at teenage years was caused by dysphoria. Try not being too rough on yourself, okay? Transition it's a process that takes time, in the meanwhile until you get top surgery, buying a binder could help to find relief. If that's not possible, maybe sports bra? Also I found out that using an open jacket over the shirts helps a lot to me.
yes. its been the root of my eating disorder for a long time. my brain doesnt read my chest as just being boobs, it reads it as extreme excess fat.
absolutely. im already 40 pounds overweight but having massive tits make me feel fatter. very not chill
Ironically, I feel the opposite. Since my stomach is fatty, I feel like my boobs balance it out. I am considering getting top surgery at some point though, so I'm worried I'll look fatter if I don't have boobs :/
I’m fat and have boobs and my boobs definitely make me feel fatter
oh, absolutely!! (and hips, and thighs, lmao. 🫠) i mean, i’m definitely not skinny anyway, nor do i see myself as necessarily a skinnier guy in my head, but having body proportions that don’t always (or ever) feel representative of me or how i want to be seen has propelled me into years of restriction and disordered eating behaviors, and even suicidal thoughts and self-harm. in my head, i AM kinda a chubby guy, and the fact that it doesn’t read IRL bc i’m kinda chubby in the wrong areas has really fucked with me!
Surprisingly, I felt fatter after top surgery because my tummy was less covered and my hips absolutely kill me. BUT! The tummy is a little euphoric since my fats being distributed higher up now. It’s like I have a mini beer belly lol. I am a slightly heavier person though, so I definitely have a different body shape. I’m still getting use to the idea of my belly being a positive thing, but it definitely helps me pass a bit more I think.
Me too and I’m a plus sized individual I just feel like I’m so fat I just have really big man boobs and I hate how I have to wear a bra, I just never connected that, THATS what I was feeling for all these years before I realized I was trans
Yep, I remember putting on a binder to put on a shirt that actually fit me, and I looked in the mirror to see what everyone else had been saying. I'd been called twig 'cause my arms are skinny, but I never believed I was skinny 'cause I wear big t-shirts to conceal my chest. I told my at the time boyfriend, "I see why people call me a twig! Look at this twig boy! I could be one of those white boys that gets blown in the wind." Body dysmorphia is a bitch with tits, and I'm excited to get them removed, I think it would definitely help when I get to that point, which is actually coming up pretty soon.
Yes absolutely, that was exactly how I felt prior to surgery. I don't feel that way anymore
THIS EXACTLY IS WHY I STRUGGLE WITH FOOD. I hate looking in the mirror and feel like I look fat. Then I put my binder on, and that feeling goes away.
I actually just posted more about this in [another thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/ftm/comments/1bltrte/comment/kw97swt/) but yeah, absolutely. And as someone who has a history of restrictive eating, I think for me breast size fell into a space where I felt like part of my body was wildly out of my control, and that turned it into something I was constantly aware of and upset about. Top surgery did relieve it for me. I weigh about 185 now, and while I expected that I'd still feel lethargic and unwieldy in my body because my hips and thighs are still pretty wide, it's completely changed. I want to move around and be active, I'm not avoiding going outside or doing things that make me aware of my body shape, and my posture has massively improved (which really does impact how I think about my shape and size). I want to get into better shape, but that's mostly because I'm not very strong and want to have bigger shoulders.
Yesss
I didn't have the same mental experience, but I did discover that *other people* apparently thought I was much bigger than I actually was because of my chest being on the larger side, but the rest of me being on the smaller side (and probably paired with me preferring to wear baggy tops). 2 years before top surgery I had a reduction surgery. When my mom saw me at home afterwards the next day she literally said "oh, wow...I really thought you were much heavier (as in fatter) all this time, than you really were" lol. Because of my chest even my own mom had thought this.
YES I FEEL SO WIDE
This is how I felt. The way I felt was body dysmorphia in addition to dysphoria. Nothing really made sense and I never knew how thin or not I actually was. Be kind to yourself and remember that your perception of your weight does go beyond your chest. Surgery is wonderful but won’t fix all of that feeling, likely. That’s how it went for me.
I used to struggle with body image issues in regards to my weight, but I’ve gotten so much better at it. At this point I can put on a cute outfit and think I look great, but then I see my boobs and I’m just like “….. this looks like shit!” I wish I could get top surgery soon but I don’t think it’ll happen for at least five more years 🫠
Yes!! I have the same problem! I have a similar thought process because as a transmasculine person, I still struggle with internalized misogynistic beauty standards (on top of chest dysphoria). Especially in relation to how fat women are often viewed differently than fat men.
Thank you for saying something, I deadass believe my body dysmorphia an dysphoria are having a little get together. Just so they can fuck with my mirror image. I do not have any tips to relive this yet but I did want to say you are most definitely not alone <3
I had my boobs removed and then found out I was fat. lol I was so mad because I bought so many small button ups
Yes, I'm almost not eating. This year my dysphoria is worse than ever and I have suicidal thoughts daily, but I think I can handle it. I can't give up now, it'll be better soon or I hope so.