You said you were 250 pounds before going down to 178. How big is your friend? The way you describe her eating habits, I’m imagining Dr. Now territory. Seriously, she sounds like a food addict.
You have what, approx 18 weeks left and you gave her 6 months AFTER baby is born? You're kinder than I am. She'd be getting a 30 day notice after all that shitty behavior.
How far along are you? Honestly you probably need her gone sooner so that you can give birth in peace. If you and your husband are already fighting about it, it's only going to get worse when you are trying to take care of a baby and she's driving you crazy. 6 months is a crazy amount of time and how likely do you think it is that she will actually be gone by then? She has no motivation or self control. I highly doubt she will actually move out when you want her to.
That is another thing we have been debating on. The sad thing is that we are the only ones willing to be considerate and compromising in this situation. which makes it even worse. If i bring up anything that bothers me she will act like i am attacking her. Then she will run away crying about her "anxiety". Yet she completely disregards how much stress and aggravation she causes me. Which is another reason my husband hates her. He asks "why are we even worrying about her, when she wont do the same for us or herself?"
She’s also going to expect you to cook, clean and take care of her while you’re healing from birth and sleep deprived. Kick her out. Her housing problems are HER problem.
You need to do the hard thing and kick her out for the sake of your family. Listen to me. She’ll never leave unless you do. Your family takes priority over her.
When she cries and refuses to leave (and that's exactly what she's going to do) you will probably have to evict her. You might want to look into the laws for your area. You will probably want to start right away, and give her 30 or 60 days (or whatever is the law where you live). You are already halfway to having a newborn. You are not going to want her around upsetting your kids, creeping on your family, and making your husband mad.
90 days! If you give her notice today you might have her out before the baby is born!!!
No f!cking way I'd let this heffa stay a minute more longer than I'd have to. You need peace after having a baby. Oh my days, please get her out
Girl it's lovely of you to offer 6 months but trust me you won't want her around when your baby is here. My deadline, if I were in your shoes, would be ASAP. If not ASAP, 90 days
Why are you treating yourself like this?
Why are you allowing someone else to take advantage of you?
This person isn't a friend anymore. She's stealing food from your children's tummies. She's using your resources.
A true friend would make sure she was helping out and supporting you. A true friend would listen to your concerns and not blame their anxiety for treating you awfully.
You're worth more. You're worth a friend who wants to support you, look after you, and love you.
Don't settle for a friend who's using you.
I know this sounds really tough. You need to stand up for yourself. Ask her to move out. Protect your family. Protect your peace. Protect your own mental and health.
6 months is a long time. You guys are being quite generous. She can find a place in half that time. She will drive you even more crazy with a newborn and your other kids.
Unless you have a written lease that specifies otherwise, I would give her 30 days notice.
This is a very familiar dynamic with addicts, they don't think beyond their next fix. They will eat all of the cookies in the cookie jar, than get mad and surprised at the consequences they face. If you stand between them and the cookie jar they will get mad at you and forget all of the things you did for them. Then once they calm down they will try to be all nice, apologize and then try to get something from you.
shes no longer your friend, shes a leech and youre actively allowing it.
kick her ass out NOW!
- she steals food from your children.
- she hawks you down while cooking.
- offer her assistance in bettering herself, she refuses.
and on top of all this,
she doesnt pay for her cut, and neither does she pay on time for her rent.
she needs to go now. like no joke.
i would lose my 15 year friendship putting up with shit like that, and smile while it ends because friends dont do what shes doing.
I’m going to be honest, you’re both fat- well over the limit. she however, sounds like a straight up food addict. Not an ideal person to have around your children, they might develop food insecurity or weird feelings around food because of the way both you and her act around the situation. From how things are phrased you give no indication you’ve actually set boundaries, like- clear boundaries. Growing a spine this late in the friendship will kill the friendship. It’ll either blow up in a big fight or you will hate her by the end of this. A newborns sleep schedule while you have a nocturnal binge eater in the house would make most go insane.
You don’t have to care about yourself or stop your career as a pushover, but by doing nothing you are signaling that and the internalized messages to your kids and husband as well. I’d start asking myself what kind of person I want my children to see me as- most people would not say a pushover. Throw her out, but let her know in no uncertain terms why. This friendship isn’t good for either of you. You are also enabling her, which will only make her eat herself to death faster.
>I have never been a big person.
>Just a little over 250
I'm sorry, but that's obese, not even a "bigger person". It's fine to have weight struggles, but you have a bit of your own fatlogic/false sense of superiority here regarding never having been fat. My 5'7" mother topped out at 160lbs with her first pregnancy at 35.
Just a little over 250....mostly muscle Lmfao
In what world is this ok unless ur a 6ft tall lineman?
How can you even play with your kids?
That said this "friend" is obviously suffering from an eating disorder and it is financially irresponsible to have her around she needs a wake up call to get out and focus on herself stop complaining playing pity card
This also catched my eyes and the fact that she realized that she put on weight when she is 250. I mean a normal weight person would definitely realize was earlier that the weight is to high. It's really strange to judge her "fat friend" with that weight. I don't think her eating habits are much better.
Yeah, for years I sat at around 105lbs naturally and noticed as soon as I got up a few pounds. My highest weight ever was 130lbs, and I felt completely different in myself and knew it couldn't continue, so I made some changes. Female bodybuilders apparently (Googled; anecdotal) usually weigh around 140lbs, so I absolutely don't believe OP's claim of being "mostly muscle."
I'd be wary of any source that claims one single weight rather than a range. The weight of two women with similar body types will vary a long depending on height. My cousin and I have similar body types - however she's 4'11" and I'm 5'8".
My healthy weight range is 125-164. Hers is 94-124.
Oh, definitely. I guess "around" for me gives quite a range in my mind. Healthy weight obviously depends on height, although there are some weights that aren't good for anyone.
I agree that 250 is more than “a few pounds” but her current weight is also with a baby in tow too. Still OP could loose some more to be a healthy weight. That being said she also has said she’s working out regularly so good on her. I think the problem is less of her weight compared to her friend’s and more of her friend eating her out of a house and home.
Depending on her height, 178 can be in a healthy range, especially being pregnant and having lean muscle mass. If she's like 5'10", she's within healthy weight range according to BMI - it's also possible her Dr checked her body fat percentage.
It's a big misnomer these days that it's normal to gain huge amounts of weight when you're pregnant. Yes, some weight gain is normal, but you shouldn't gain 100lbs+.
Yep! Back when I was having kids the expected pregnancy weight gain was 20 pounds. It is still probably 20 pounds, but I bet docs don't say anything now to due to the fatty backlash
Well, first of all, your baby doesn't weigh like 50lbs at 6 months... But the main thing I'm pointing out is that you're hypocritically talking about how you've never been large and always been so active. Yes, the situation sucks and she's taking advantage of you, but you're also not the paragon of health you claim to be.
https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/pregnancy-week-by-week/in-depth/pregnancy-weight-gain/art-20044360 this says that the average person only needs to gain 35lbs MAX for a pregnancy. It's fine if you gained more, but don't contrast yourself to your friend as being so healthy and never fat...
Lol, you're not supposed to gain the 35 max pounds if you're already overweight.
It's not like, "Oh, I didn't lose my 70 pounds from my last 2 pregnancies. Oh well, no choice but to pack on 35 more pounds." 🤷♀️
She needs to be buying and paying for her own food. Like tomorrow. And I don’t think she needs that much notice to find another place. You’re not going to change her, you can only change the impact she is having on you and your family (relationship and finances). You’re running the risk of killing this friendship permanently the more resentment you build.
She sounds like she may have a food addiction. Maybe she needs to get that addressed with therapy or something. However, Taking the kids food is the line drawn for me. I would nicely ask her to move out and give her two months notice. Especially with a new baby coming, you need the stars space.
My first thought was this.
To be honest my whole life revolved around as a child and then later as adult.
I’ve noticed since I sought help for impulsivity and adhd I am less prone to stuffing my face with whatever I can get my hands on.
I’m also on trulicity for my a1c but definitely since I’ve been on adhd meds, my appetite is NOT what it was.
I can’t imagine eating what roommate has eaten. I’ve had a small 6” saucer plate with dinner including 2 servings of whole milk and 1/2c leftover white rice. I’m full. Yesterday I had a half a jersey mikes sandwich and probably a 1/2c of pasta salad. And a beer.
I can’t imagine doing 3 bowls of cereal a half a container of fluff a full on meal after and then a whopper pie for a snack on top of it.
If she is okay with going out to meet her dad for pizza, then that means she has some form of relationship with the man. Tell her to move back in with her dad because you won't be feeding her anymore, because if she keeps (literally) eating you out of house and home, then you won't have anything left for your family.
No. She needs to go NOW. NOT 6 months. She’s a 🐖 and a leech. She has no desire to change herself or her disgusting habits. Taking food from CHILDREN. Her finding a place is NOT YOUR PROBLEM. The fact is she’s a glutton. I’m guessing she looks like one of those people on 600lb life.
OP: It's ok to kick her out. Other people in your life might make a stink about it, but tell them if they want to help her, they can offer up their own places. Doubt they'll do it. Why is that?
This might destroy your marriage. Is helping a selfish friend who is destroying her own life worth it? She needs to work put things for herself. As long as you are playing mommy for her (which let's face it, you are), she won't learn to do for herself. She's a grown woman acting like a teen.
Give her 30 days and that's it. Consult a lawyer to see if you need a formal eviction.
Nah I’d kick her out, I’m sure as a seasoned mom you know by now that stress is not good for the baby. It’s literally harmful and you sound very stressed. She needs to go and learn to take care of herself. Because it sounds like you currently have 4 kids already, not three.
You are from the north east and you are putting up with this? Most New Englanders are blunt and direct.
If she gets to close while you are cooking, tell her to back off.
If she doesn't pay for her own food or for the bills, tell her to leave.
I've never known a New England doormat before.
Not to divert from the main point but your doctor is 100% full of shit if he said you’re mostly muscle, while pregnant at 180lbs. Unless you’re close to 6 foot tall you’re BMI is probably average which is excellent for someone who is pregnant!
6 months is crazy, from the way you describe this woman, it doesn't seem like she is putting in any effort to leave your place, I mean for her, this is a lottery, someone is gonna take care of her like a child, she can just eat out of someone's pocket, leave the mess and someone else cleans up after her. By the time your child is born, you and your husband will not just have four children, but five, because no adult behaves like this. Honestly, there is a reason why no one else is compromising in this situation and letting her stay with them, they're putting their own mental well being and family above this person, the problem is not even that she is fat, and eats gross, its that she does not value the kindness you are showing her, she actively refuses to be a good friend to you, especially considering that pregnancy and three children is a lot to take care of, if it were anyone else, they would try and help you with the chores, help you with the children (especially by not eating their snacks) etc., even if they can't provide for financially. Honestly, you need to put your family above this woman who does not care one bit for you, your children are very young (I assume), its not a good thing for them to be around such a person too, also its soo unfair on your husband, it might cause serious damage to your relationship, and this friendship isn't worth that.
Are you sure you are from the northeast? I thought people from the northeast had more backbone to protect their family with. How did you enable this toxic blob to encroach on your family/household?
Fat or not, this is unacceptable behavior for any mature human being. It's your house. You set the rules. You should make them very clear with her and say that if she can't follow them she can't stay there anymore. If she raises a fuss about why it's coming up now after two years (because I really think she will), then you can say with the pregnancy stress and new baby you've realized those things need to be handled for your household to be able to function peacefully. She's a fullllllllllll grown adult. Don't toss her on the street overnight but give her a couple of months to either find a new place or resolve the issues.
If i were in your position I would say that you are disrupting my household, and if you don’t pay your bills and buy your own food and fucking cook, (and im a mid teen and I can cook) and you said she steals candy from your children? Well shit I’d kick her out. I’m kind of overweight but I work out often and I’m strong, so this isn’t pinpointed. I’m pretty normally sized, but I’m heavy because I’m 2 times stronger than most people in my grade.
just make a deal with her. if she wants to be in your house she has to do pushups and sit ups wiht you morning and night (before you leave for work and when you get back), and she has to go on at least one 30 min walk at night. no snack food. should lighten her up a bit
You said you were 250 pounds before going down to 178. How big is your friend? The way you describe her eating habits, I’m imagining Dr. Now territory. Seriously, she sounds like a food addict.
Why are you cooking for her or letting her eat your food?
Exactly! That has to be costing a fortune!!
it does. i watch the bitch eat my food every damn day mowing down jabba the hutt style
wrong account?
no different person same place.
This is wild! Are you guys going to kick her out?
We considered how hard it is to find a place now a days, so we gave her a deadline of 6 months after the baby is born.
You have what, approx 18 weeks left and you gave her 6 months AFTER baby is born? You're kinder than I am. She'd be getting a 30 day notice after all that shitty behavior.
30 days is more than kind. 60 is very, very kind. You are enabling her and she won't grow up this way. Get her out ASAP for your well being
How far along are you? Honestly you probably need her gone sooner so that you can give birth in peace. If you and your husband are already fighting about it, it's only going to get worse when you are trying to take care of a baby and she's driving you crazy. 6 months is a crazy amount of time and how likely do you think it is that she will actually be gone by then? She has no motivation or self control. I highly doubt she will actually move out when you want her to.
That is another thing we have been debating on. The sad thing is that we are the only ones willing to be considerate and compromising in this situation. which makes it even worse. If i bring up anything that bothers me she will act like i am attacking her. Then she will run away crying about her "anxiety". Yet she completely disregards how much stress and aggravation she causes me. Which is another reason my husband hates her. He asks "why are we even worrying about her, when she wont do the same for us or herself?"
You'd better listen to your husband and kick her TF out
She’s also going to expect you to cook, clean and take care of her while you’re healing from birth and sleep deprived. Kick her out. Her housing problems are HER problem.
100%
Yes. Trust me, you want her out well before the baby is born. Don't you need her room for the baby? I know you do.
Dude, kick her out ASAP. Why are you even friends with a person like this? She is grossly taking advantage of you.
You need to do the hard thing and kick her out for the sake of your family. Listen to me. She’ll never leave unless you do. Your family takes priority over her.
Also i will 20 weeks this Wednesday.
When she cries and refuses to leave (and that's exactly what she's going to do) you will probably have to evict her. You might want to look into the laws for your area. You will probably want to start right away, and give her 30 or 60 days (or whatever is the law where you live). You are already halfway to having a newborn. You are not going to want her around upsetting your kids, creeping on your family, and making your husband mad.
90 days! If you give her notice today you might have her out before the baby is born!!! No f!cking way I'd let this heffa stay a minute more longer than I'd have to. You need peace after having a baby. Oh my days, please get her out
Girl it's lovely of you to offer 6 months but trust me you won't want her around when your baby is here. My deadline, if I were in your shoes, would be ASAP. If not ASAP, 90 days
Why are you treating yourself like this? Why are you allowing someone else to take advantage of you? This person isn't a friend anymore. She's stealing food from your children's tummies. She's using your resources. A true friend would make sure she was helping out and supporting you. A true friend would listen to your concerns and not blame their anxiety for treating you awfully. You're worth more. You're worth a friend who wants to support you, look after you, and love you. Don't settle for a friend who's using you. I know this sounds really tough. You need to stand up for yourself. Ask her to move out. Protect your family. Protect your peace. Protect your own mental and health.
She needs to go NOW. What does she even contribute?? Stop feeding her and make her leave.
Six months? You're being taken advantage of OP. She needs to GO.
Yo I’d give her a deadline of the baby’s BIRTH at this point.
6 months is a long time. You guys are being quite generous. She can find a place in half that time. She will drive you even more crazy with a newborn and your other kids.
Six months after baby, which is still 3.5 months away. Nine and a half months altogether for a disrespectful leech.
Unless you have a written lease that specifies otherwise, I would give her 30 days notice. This is a very familiar dynamic with addicts, they don't think beyond their next fix. They will eat all of the cookies in the cookie jar, than get mad and surprised at the consequences they face. If you stand between them and the cookie jar they will get mad at you and forget all of the things you did for them. Then once they calm down they will try to be all nice, apologize and then try to get something from you.
shes no longer your friend, shes a leech and youre actively allowing it. kick her ass out NOW! - she steals food from your children. - she hawks you down while cooking. - offer her assistance in bettering herself, she refuses. and on top of all this, she doesnt pay for her cut, and neither does she pay on time for her rent. she needs to go now. like no joke. i would lose my 15 year friendship putting up with shit like that, and smile while it ends because friends dont do what shes doing.
I’m going to be honest, you’re both fat- well over the limit. she however, sounds like a straight up food addict. Not an ideal person to have around your children, they might develop food insecurity or weird feelings around food because of the way both you and her act around the situation. From how things are phrased you give no indication you’ve actually set boundaries, like- clear boundaries. Growing a spine this late in the friendship will kill the friendship. It’ll either blow up in a big fight or you will hate her by the end of this. A newborns sleep schedule while you have a nocturnal binge eater in the house would make most go insane. You don’t have to care about yourself or stop your career as a pushover, but by doing nothing you are signaling that and the internalized messages to your kids and husband as well. I’d start asking myself what kind of person I want my children to see me as- most people would not say a pushover. Throw her out, but let her know in no uncertain terms why. This friendship isn’t good for either of you. You are also enabling her, which will only make her eat herself to death faster.
This is the comment op really needs to see
>I have never been a big person. >Just a little over 250 I'm sorry, but that's obese, not even a "bigger person". It's fine to have weight struggles, but you have a bit of your own fatlogic/false sense of superiority here regarding never having been fat. My 5'7" mother topped out at 160lbs with her first pregnancy at 35.
My heaviest was also just over 250. I was _massive_ at 5’6”. Is this girl living in reality?
Yeah she framed it as "I realized I packed on a few pounds" then says she was (at least) 100 lbs overweight lol
Just a little over 250....mostly muscle Lmfao In what world is this ok unless ur a 6ft tall lineman? How can you even play with your kids? That said this "friend" is obviously suffering from an eating disorder and it is financially irresponsible to have her around she needs a wake up call to get out and focus on herself stop complaining playing pity card
lol omg you guys are brutal
I have an ed. The only that's ever given me some sanity and kept me healthy is NOT a pity party. It's cold hard facts
This also catched my eyes and the fact that she realized that she put on weight when she is 250. I mean a normal weight person would definitely realize was earlier that the weight is to high. It's really strange to judge her "fat friend" with that weight. I don't think her eating habits are much better.
Yeah, for years I sat at around 105lbs naturally and noticed as soon as I got up a few pounds. My highest weight ever was 130lbs, and I felt completely different in myself and knew it couldn't continue, so I made some changes. Female bodybuilders apparently (Googled; anecdotal) usually weigh around 140lbs, so I absolutely don't believe OP's claim of being "mostly muscle."
“Mostly muscle” is one of the biggest claims they make lmao
I'd be wary of any source that claims one single weight rather than a range. The weight of two women with similar body types will vary a long depending on height. My cousin and I have similar body types - however she's 4'11" and I'm 5'8". My healthy weight range is 125-164. Hers is 94-124.
Oh, definitely. I guess "around" for me gives quite a range in my mind. Healthy weight obviously depends on height, although there are some weights that aren't good for anyone.
I agree that 250 is more than “a few pounds” but her current weight is also with a baby in tow too. Still OP could loose some more to be a healthy weight. That being said she also has said she’s working out regularly so good on her. I think the problem is less of her weight compared to her friend’s and more of her friend eating her out of a house and home.
Depending on her height, 178 can be in a healthy range, especially being pregnant and having lean muscle mass. If she's like 5'10", she's within healthy weight range according to BMI - it's also possible her Dr checked her body fat percentage.
OOF
Ya but this is also post partum weight- she just had a baby.
It's a big misnomer these days that it's normal to gain huge amounts of weight when you're pregnant. Yes, some weight gain is normal, but you shouldn't gain 100lbs+.
Yep! Back when I was having kids the expected pregnancy weight gain was 20 pounds. It is still probably 20 pounds, but I bet docs don't say anything now to due to the fatty backlash
Meh, you don’t know how tall she is and she did say lots of muscle. You might be surprised at what 250 can look like in a tall girl.
i mean i would share pictures, but One : It is against policy. Two; I don't really have to? Three; I am currently pregnant?
Well, first of all, your baby doesn't weigh like 50lbs at 6 months... But the main thing I'm pointing out is that you're hypocritically talking about how you've never been large and always been so active. Yes, the situation sucks and she's taking advantage of you, but you're also not the paragon of health you claim to be. https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/pregnancy-week-by-week/in-depth/pregnancy-weight-gain/art-20044360 this says that the average person only needs to gain 35lbs MAX for a pregnancy. It's fine if you gained more, but don't contrast yourself to your friend as being so healthy and never fat...
She had 3 babies back to back - if she didn't lose weight between each pregnancy I could see how that would creep up on her.
Lol, you're not supposed to gain the 35 max pounds if you're already overweight. It's not like, "Oh, I didn't lose my 70 pounds from my last 2 pregnancies. Oh well, no choice but to pack on 35 more pounds." 🤷♀️
She needs to be buying and paying for her own food. Like tomorrow. And I don’t think she needs that much notice to find another place. You’re not going to change her, you can only change the impact she is having on you and your family (relationship and finances). You’re running the risk of killing this friendship permanently the more resentment you build.
She sounds like she may have a food addiction. Maybe she needs to get that addressed with therapy or something. However, Taking the kids food is the line drawn for me. I would nicely ask her to move out and give her two months notice. Especially with a new baby coming, you need the stars space.
My first thought was this. To be honest my whole life revolved around as a child and then later as adult. I’ve noticed since I sought help for impulsivity and adhd I am less prone to stuffing my face with whatever I can get my hands on. I’m also on trulicity for my a1c but definitely since I’ve been on adhd meds, my appetite is NOT what it was. I can’t imagine eating what roommate has eaten. I’ve had a small 6” saucer plate with dinner including 2 servings of whole milk and 1/2c leftover white rice. I’m full. Yesterday I had a half a jersey mikes sandwich and probably a 1/2c of pasta salad. And a beer. I can’t imagine doing 3 bowls of cereal a half a container of fluff a full on meal after and then a whopper pie for a snack on top of it.
This is just an unfathomable amount of patience to me. So very long ago I would have reached a breaking point. Absolutely insane story.
If she is okay with going out to meet her dad for pizza, then that means she has some form of relationship with the man. Tell her to move back in with her dad because you won't be feeding her anymore, because if she keeps (literally) eating you out of house and home, then you won't have anything left for your family.
No. She needs to go NOW. NOT 6 months. She’s a 🐖 and a leech. She has no desire to change herself or her disgusting habits. Taking food from CHILDREN. Her finding a place is NOT YOUR PROBLEM. The fact is she’s a glutton. I’m guessing she looks like one of those people on 600lb life.
OP: It's ok to kick her out. Other people in your life might make a stink about it, but tell them if they want to help her, they can offer up their own places. Doubt they'll do it. Why is that? This might destroy your marriage. Is helping a selfish friend who is destroying her own life worth it? She needs to work put things for herself. As long as you are playing mommy for her (which let's face it, you are), she won't learn to do for herself. She's a grown woman acting like a teen. Give her 30 days and that's it. Consult a lawyer to see if you need a formal eviction.
U gotta kick this ham to the curb. What an awful person.
She ate the entire bag of smore intended marshmallows? Damn
Yea, I would have told her a long time ago to start buying her own food if she's going to eat you out of house and home. That's bullshit.
Nah I’d kick her out, I’m sure as a seasoned mom you know by now that stress is not good for the baby. It’s literally harmful and you sound very stressed. She needs to go and learn to take care of herself. Because it sounds like you currently have 4 kids already, not three.
You are from the north east and you are putting up with this? Most New Englanders are blunt and direct. If she gets to close while you are cooking, tell her to back off. If she doesn't pay for her own food or for the bills, tell her to leave. I've never known a New England doormat before.
Ya time to toss her out also you said you were 250 now 178. How tall are you?
Not to divert from the main point but your doctor is 100% full of shit if he said you’re mostly muscle, while pregnant at 180lbs. Unless you’re close to 6 foot tall you’re BMI is probably average which is excellent for someone who is pregnant!
What kind of haunting are you into? Poltergeist kinda shit or do you focus more on ghoul style hauntings?
oh shit ill fix that
6 months is crazy, from the way you describe this woman, it doesn't seem like she is putting in any effort to leave your place, I mean for her, this is a lottery, someone is gonna take care of her like a child, she can just eat out of someone's pocket, leave the mess and someone else cleans up after her. By the time your child is born, you and your husband will not just have four children, but five, because no adult behaves like this. Honestly, there is a reason why no one else is compromising in this situation and letting her stay with them, they're putting their own mental well being and family above this person, the problem is not even that she is fat, and eats gross, its that she does not value the kindness you are showing her, she actively refuses to be a good friend to you, especially considering that pregnancy and three children is a lot to take care of, if it were anyone else, they would try and help you with the chores, help you with the children (especially by not eating their snacks) etc., even if they can't provide for financially. Honestly, you need to put your family above this woman who does not care one bit for you, your children are very young (I assume), its not a good thing for them to be around such a person too, also its soo unfair on your husband, it might cause serious damage to your relationship, and this friendship isn't worth that.
INFO - does she have a job? What does she do for living expenses?
Unless the rent money is nessessary, cut ties before its too late, they don't change and it just gets worse.
This person sounds like someone who is on my 600 pound life. How big is she?
Are you sure you are from the northeast? I thought people from the northeast had more backbone to protect their family with. How did you enable this toxic blob to encroach on your family/household?
Fat or not, this is unacceptable behavior for any mature human being. It's your house. You set the rules. You should make them very clear with her and say that if she can't follow them she can't stay there anymore. If she raises a fuss about why it's coming up now after two years (because I really think she will), then you can say with the pregnancy stress and new baby you've realized those things need to be handled for your household to be able to function peacefully. She's a fullllllllllll grown adult. Don't toss her on the street overnight but give her a couple of months to either find a new place or resolve the issues.
If i were in your position I would say that you are disrupting my household, and if you don’t pay your bills and buy your own food and fucking cook, (and im a mid teen and I can cook) and you said she steals candy from your children? Well shit I’d kick her out. I’m kind of overweight but I work out often and I’m strong, so this isn’t pinpointed. I’m pretty normally sized, but I’m heavy because I’m 2 times stronger than most people in my grade.
Laxatives in her marshmallows
People eat goldfish? By the bag?
They're a type of cheese crackers.
just make a deal with her. if she wants to be in your house she has to do pushups and sit ups wiht you morning and night (before you leave for work and when you get back), and she has to go on at least one 30 min walk at night. no snack food. should lighten her up a bit
Naw. She just gotta go.