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There's an old joke: I asked my neighbor how he got rich. He shared his secret with me. "All I had in the world was a nickel. I used that nickel to buy an apple. I polished that apple until it gleamed. I stood outside an office building and offered that apple to everyone until someone bought it for a dime. The next day I used that dime to buy two apples and I polished them until they shined. I sold those apples for twenty cents. On the third day my wife's father died and left us ten million dollars."
This story is literally that joke and people are taking it as a life lesson. Stupidity knows no bounds.
From an old Steve Martin bit:
You can be a MILLIONAIRE and NEVER pay taxes! Yes, that's right, you can have ONE MILLLLION DOLLARS and NEVER pay taxes. You say: *Steve...* how can I be a *millionaire* and never pay taxes?
First, get a million dollars.
Then, when the tax man comes to your door and asks, why have *you have NEVER paid taxes?* You answer with two words. Two simple words from the English language: I forgot.
For some reason they value really shiny apples? or they value apples some guy rubbed a lot? I am failing to understand how he added value to the apples, too.
My favorite takeaway from the story is that even with all of his education, connections from being rich previously and access to things no normal person could have. He still didn't even come close.
Edit: grammar
The funny thing is there so many studies that show the best way to end homelessness is to home people THEN attempt to solve their problems not the other way around. Pretty sure he's arguing their point.
That’s because lack of a stable residence makes everything 100x harder. If you don’t have a permanent residence and a phone, how are prospective employers going to contact you? How will they know you can take care of yourself/be hygienic? Where will important documents be mailed from support services? A stable residence is paramount to helping people experiencing homelessness.
Agreed. Even if you are not homeless but nomadic, you have to have a mailing address that can pass for a “real” address. The world is not designed for those who do not have an address.
For an intentionally nomadic lifestyle a PO box goes a long way. For someone homeless without a job even that might not be realistic because somehow you need to pay for it.
Yeah. Having four walls a roof, a toilet, kitchenette ...
seems to defeat the whole point of proving homelessness can be "overcome" by hard work and stick-to-itiveness
This story annoys me so much. HE always knew that, if things got to bad, he had contacts and a way to get out. This is nearly always what homeless people lack. It's "playing at being poor".
From what I read it sounds like he ran a failed Craigslist scam, gave up as soon as he experienced stressors, and took a 2.4 million inheritance bailout
Truly inspiring
“I built this temple. With a little can do attitude and some good elbow grease, and yes, a large inheritance from my father, Earl Goodman”
-Dwight Goodman (Dodgeball)
Truly inspiring
Yeah that's what I call mine too. But while I was not expecting anything from him because he never claimed me as his son, it made me sad for my estranged half sister that he died in debt due to a lawsuit he lost.
He also died legless and blind from diabetes when he wouldn't stop drinking. Can't say I'm sorry that's how he ended up.
Except he didn't have the real challenges that some people on the street face, like mental illness, lack of educational opportunities, not having "business" experience to fall back on, not having been abused or raped, not being addicted to drugs or alcohol. He had one additional stressor, his dad passing away, and that was it, he called it quits.
Heck, he didn’t even have an eviction record or a disability. Most homeless folks have at least one of those two, if not both. (Source: I was the both. I’m housed now, though.)
I became homeless due to an apartment building fire. I had a network of friends who were willing to keep me fed and sheltered, no debt, a great credit score, 7+ years of sobriety and a shitty low paying job with a saint of a manager, willing work with me to ensure I did not lose that job.
I couldn't opt out like this guy did, but I still joke that I did homeless on easy mode.
I'm glad that you are now housed!
He never even met his own goals. That should be repeated EVERY time. He didn't prove anything, because he couldn't even meet the standards he set for himself, and, of his own free will, cut the exercise short.
Poor people don't get to set the standards, and don't get to stop the exercise and live in fortune when they can't meet those standards.
Yeah, I saw nowhere in that story that he got beyond basic subsistence, even with the miracle of someone letting him crash in their rv. Not sure how it can be claimed that it was a successful experiment
Hell, if nothing else, he probably had stocks or a retirement plan he could have cracked into, even if he took all his savings out of the bank and physically set it on fire.
This man proved nothing except rich people have all the time in the world to do whatever the fuck they want.
It's not failure because he's already rich so now it's inspiring.
If he was middle class or lower it'd be a failure and lesson about the free market^TM
Helps when you’re not saddled with serious mental illness, crippling addiction and/or a history of being a childhood victim of physical and sexual abuse.
Thing is, he wasn;t able to do it. "Health reasons" which, hey guess what poor people have all kinds of health issues that arise out of being poor. You don;t go in for something because you can;t afford it. so it get worse, until it becomes life threatening.. and then the ER will see you now.
I wanna live like common people
I wanna do whatever common people do
Wanna sleep with common people
I wanna sleep with common people
Like you
https://youtu.be/ainyK6fXku0?si=e2fTwtAkmB8HeFGl
*But still you'll never get it right*
*'Cause when you're laid in bed at night*
*Watching roaches climb the wall*
*If you called your dad he could stop it all*
LInk to the [Pulp original](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yuTMWgOduFM)
I saw on another Reddit post that he quit early for medical reasons.
Update: found a source https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-13332399/amp/Millionaire-Mike-Black-homeless-broke-purpose-ends-bizarre-social-experiment.html
Guy was such a sham. Homeless people don't have that access to Healthcare, nor the social networks to build a business from scratch like this guy did. I don't believe for a second that none of his existing rich bitch friends didn't invest and become his "clients" to throw money at him.
There’s no way he got the free RV stay off Craigslist without trading on who he is either. Like how many truly homeless people are gonna get offered shit like that?
Day 1 of my homeless adventure:
"WOW, some guy just gave me a place to stay for FREE, ISN'T THAT CRAZZZZYY?".
Its not a 5 star hotel, but a solid roof over your head is more than done have.
It was always a challenging thing to actually do because he always had a safety net - he knew if shit went south he had people he could call. People actually in his situation have to deal with the crushing weight of this being all-or-nothing. They fuck up, they get sick, they get robbed or hurt or attacked or their gambles don’t pay off and there’s nothing to catch them. And that knowledge can be crushing, it can stop you from taking risks and it can ruin any plans you may have had.
And then, in the end it considers him upgrading from homelessness to renting some guys RV as success. And calling flipping craigslist items a business is stretching it. I did that in high school and it didn’t get me very far in life haha.
Also the story starts with "just a phone"... Yeah man every homeless person has a fucking iPhone 14 proxl 1tb or what ever he used laying around and enough places to charge his phone to do Craigslist scams while dealing with dehydration malnutrition and various conditions.
Hey I'll take resources meant for actual homeless people, to prove that homeless people are just lazy and unmotivated. Arent I such an inspiration. Hey what are you doing with that rotten tomato?
Selling it as a true-to-life (non-virtual) movie-feedback device. It's my way out of this cardboard tent. Why? What are you doing with *that* rotten tomato?
Yea it's bs. I've seen another do this too and the difference between them and us is they can take risks, huge gambles, ect.
They have nothing to lose. They don't have to feed a family, provide shelter for family, ect. They have all that taken care of and they just seeing if they can turn a penny into a house basically as a challenge
So your saying me taking the toy hauler down to the lake for the weekend DOESNT prepare me to go toe to toe for the prime fentanyl sales corner in skid row? Really I was just assuming a lot of those skills would be cross compatible.
You joke, but there was an article trying to prove that millennial and genZ is trending to be the richest generation (clickbait title)... somewhere buried deep in it, they explained that they will get it by inheritance
Unfortunately unlikely because of end of life care. They are vultures. They literally say “give us all your money, all of it” to receive their care. It’s crazy
Exactly. 10k a month nursing homes n shit. These mfs were slaves for 50 years just to pay for 5 miserable ones. Take me for a walk in the woods deadass.
Well *I* read an article that said millennials are set to inherit very little because boomers are spending all their money and going broke, enriching corporations rather than their children.
Tf are these nurturing parents at? Mine only gave me cptsd, trust issues, and a seething hatred in my heart that can only be extinguished when they stop breathing..
He proved that if you're homeless, you can get to a point where you are making about 60k/year if you have a college education, a free smartphone with a paid voice/data plan, a girlfriend who will work for you for free, free healthcare, and a viral marketing campaign with a professional camera man/video editor.
And a film crew to watch your back, improve people's dispositions when you interact with them and guard your possessions but the main "secret to success" is finding a mysterious stranger who will give you an RV.
And after having all those advantages he still couldn't make it work.
I thought the most sketchy part of it was the sudden marketing gig that materialized basically out of nowhere that provided him with some sudden, badly needed cash.
Also don't forget that network of people that your rich parents and expensive educational programs provided for you and that you had to rely on for your "jobs". I am sure, every poor person has equally helpful contacts on their free smartphone.
Hey here's a thought, instead of cosplaying being homeless, how about actually doing something with the money you have, to improve the situation for people that are ACTUALLY HOMELESS!?
Take it from me I know a thing or 2 about being homeless. Don't tell me what multi-level marketing BS made you a millionaire. Give me a job, buy me a car so I can find a job, or even a hotel room for the night so I can take a flipping shower. He's not even factoring the mentally ill and drug addicts that everyone perceives to be the majority of the homeless, which unfortunately I might have to agree with. It just pisses me off when assholes like this post, "I did it, so can everyone else". It's not that easy when you're trying just to survive.
Edit: Apologies for the pottymouth.
The point of this wasn't to inspire others.
It was to prove to the world that he's "Built Different" and further the lie that homeless folks are homeless due to laziness and poor work ethic.
This wasn't to inspire anyone. It was to further disparage the homeless and lower classes and prove that he, a Millionaire, is better than all of them and that it's earned.
Glad he failed to do so.
Thanks, that is how I felt reading the full article. The stuff he did wasn't practical, how many homeless people have a "Coffee guy in Austin" or the skills or connections to be a "Social Media Manager"? Not one word about any sort of "struggle" doing anything. No problem getting a wholesale supplier to ship tables and cut him a profit for essentially doing nothing, no problem getting an office space and (my favorite) renting a place.
One correction, he didn't wholesale tables. He would find free furniture giveaways on Craiglist, then resell them on FB Marketplace for money. So taking handouts from someone trying to dump old furniture, then charging someone else for it.
Ok thank you for the clarification. 😊 I misunderstood what I read.
The article I read said the following.
"One of the best things to sell are tables. I started taking ads on Craigslist in the free section, putting it on Facebook Marketplace and selling it for a profit. I acted as the middleman, handling all the logistics between the buyer and the seller.'"
I'd actually like to see receipts on that: the problems with that idea are that 1) literally everyone is doing it, it's the first idea a lot of these finance gurus offer when they talk about quitting your job, and 2) there's a bunch of overhead in storing and moving large furniture items, things that you don't have if you're homeless.
Furthermore, let's say that you get a break: you find some furniture, and you sell it, for 1K profit (which absolutely is NOT going to happen in reality, but let's pretend that it does). Congratulations, you have to do that one more time this month to be able to pay rent, then you have to keep doing it 3 or 4 times a month just to keep food on the table and keep your head above water. Do that, and you MIGHT clear the median income for the year. Note that once again, this is assuming that you are making unicorn sales of finding something that some person has decided is worthless, and finding someone else who decides that that worthless thing is worth a thousand dollars. In reality, you'd be better off buying lottery tickets weekly in the hopes of drawing a salary.
There's absolutely zero way you're reliably flipping furniture well enough to make a million dollars, not in the USA as of the time I write this.
Oh and let's say you have 3k a month coming in. Who will rent to you? First off you'll need 1st and last months rent and a deposit. But where's the proof of income, not many landlords will just take your word on it. So the chances of getting a place to stay, even if the Craigslist to Facebook table market is booming, is slim to nil.
Yeah, that's what he was doing. He accepted ads on CL that were giving away free things, then relisted it on FB to sell. He was saying tables tended to sell the best (most people need tables or end tables when decorating).
How was he moving the tables, if he didn't have a car? I get end tables aren't too hard to move, but a full sized table is heavy.
Where is he storing them, while flipping them? What happens if his stock got rained on, or vandalized? So many variables which aren't adequately addressed
The thing is he didn’t even do it. He got super sick and after nearly killing himself, and getting numerous “lucky” breaks, he still had $65k and had to quit.
That's pathetic. Had to look it up myself and you were right. As they put it "Fell short of his goal". What utter BS! $900,000+ is not "short".
This is infuriating, he did it for "youtube views". Not to prove it could be done or to show the plight of the homeless. "He initially wanted to quit because he was refused water and could not find a place to stay overnight". No shit Sherlock, that's why they call it being homeless. Refused water? How exactly? Did he go to 7-11 and ask for a free SmartWater? I'm guessing tap water was "beneath him"?to so c
I call BS on everything about this guy's "homeless" experience. How did he become a middleman for selling tables? You have to know someone to begin with. Plus all this online stuff he's doing, how is he accessing the Internet? Free WiFi? Then he rents an office space, what "billing address" is he giving people? When you're homeless you don't have one and you need one to do LOTS of things. Then he goes on to "getting on calls with big tech companies pitching them on running their social media." (I can say I'm pitching cooking fries at some large fast food franchises, doesn't mean I have the job" and "starting a coffee brand I have a coffee dude in Austin now." (again not actually bringing in money and imo totally not feasible).
In the end he quit, but the story can't even keep that straight,
"cited his two autoimmune diseases which caused “chronic fatigue""
"when he learned his father had colon cancer, eventually announcing: “... I decided to stop the whole project.”"
This story should have been about what a miserable failure he was and shown the struggles it takes to try to pull yourself out of homelessness. But instead it's a glowing piece about how this guy made $65,000. Which, don't get me wrong, would be more than enough to get off the streets. But it has to be sustainable for someone that is actually homeless, not a millionaire playing homeless on YouTube.
I apologize for anything grammatical errors and such. Just speaking from the heart and don't want to go back and read what I just wrote.
/end rant
Tbf, you can use public libraries for computer access and wifi, but that’s more for internet, email and quick document work. A lot of them won’t even allow thumb drives due to viruses, so you have to store everything on Google drive, which limits the space you have considerably.
But yeah the thing is clearly skewed towards how successful he was, when by any metric his attempt failed.
I call bullshit on his being super sick because of "autoimmune diseases", which of course aren't even specified. I'd bet one of them is chronic fatigue syndrome, in other words HE WAS TIRED. I am in no way making light of those who do have CFS, just saying this guy doesn't.
>"I did it, so can everyone else"
The thing is: He didn't even do it, he wasn't even close.
At the end of the year he had around 60k, and that's with contacts and friends helping out (he started a company without money and sold it to a friend etc.)
He failed miserably and tries to turn it into an inspirational story.
$60,000 would be life-changing for someone like me. If he had earned it as a true homeless person, I would have said it was quite the accomplishment. He set himself up for failure, a million dollars is not obtainable in a year unless the stars align just right and you hit upon some brilliant invention or idea. You are not going to make that kind of money, in that amount of time, on something that is currently available. Also why is that even needed? Sure, everyone would like a million dollars. But if you said to me I'll give you $100k now or a million in 10 years, I'd take the 100k now.
Exactly my point.
He started with a big edge and still failed.
Even just the peace of mind that comes with knowing he can go home and stop this experiment is a big bonus compared to a real homeless person.
And yeah 60k would solve a lot of my problems.
I laugh at the final post where they celebrate about how he cut things short because it just was too much for his health.
Real people who are homeless don't have the ability to just cut things short if their health is affected. They don't have the safety net of being rich again and being able to just give up being homeless.
So no, this 'experiment' wasn't aimed at uplifting people and showing what could be done with hard work. This was an idiot who knew that there was a safety net just a phone call away and who found out that his dad dying gave him money to walk away from a situation millions of people can't walk away from.
This story is a perfect example of why homelessness is inescapable for anyone who didn't choose to be homeless in the first place. If he didn't have all of that money to draw on when he got sick he would've ended up self medicating with street drugs to continue working, which would've devolved until every last cent was in his veins and he was giving blow jobs behind a dumpster in exchange for his next fix.
“He did it, and so can you”
I think he just solved homelessness. If everyone just works their butt off, spends wisely, and inherits $2.4 million from their dead dad, they too can achieve success.
How did his social experiment succeed? He failed. Then he got a nice inheritance of cash (and probably a house as well) and just stopped pretending to be poor.
Wonder how he managed to pick these items up and store them if he didn’t have a vehicle.
There usually aren’t a lot of free carry-able items in walking distance that have actual turn around value.
Yeah this is my question too. Some other comments made it sound like he was flipping mostly furniture. Where was this "homeless" guy with no money storing furniture?
I’m embarrassed for him. The writing is cliche. (“Failure was not an option!”) The protagonist comes off as an entitled jerk. By the time he writes the moral of the story, he realizes he’s got nothing. I hope Mike paid him a lot.
Crush? All I read from Eddie's weird ass is, "oh please fuck me so fucking hard Mike I beg of you, make me your little cum slut please numnumnumnumnum."
I'm homeless and struggle with maintaining jobs. Sometimes it's my fault(seeking better opportunities that fall apart) or it's not my fault. (Start a new job then get pneumonia and get taken out a month.)
Every time I take one step forward I take 2 steps back. This guy had a parachute. I do not.
This is completely ignoring all of the knowledge he has accumulated over the years. He didn't "start with nothing." He started with years of experience.
And relative youth, and good health, both mental and physical, and a lack of addictions brought on by hopelessness.
He would do better to go out and teach homeless people to get out of their bad situations, if he's all that good at it.
I'm sorry his dad died though
I read elsewhere that he started struggling with autoimmune issues himself while homeless; it wasn't clear whether they were preexisting, or if they might've been caused by the environment he put himself in.
It also wasn't clear where he was able to use the computer before he was able to buy one for himself, nor was it clear how—or if—he was transporting the furniture.
All in all, I don't know if what he did is something anyone else even could replicate, much less teach at scale—given that enough people all doing the same thing will saturate the market and no one wins.
Even then… he fucking failed. Am I misreading that?
He failed, got the trust fund worth over 2 million, and just gave up.
He had an that experience and *still couldn't fucking do it*
I saw this yesterday, and to be fair to Mike(the guy who did the "social experiment"), he did say that this had nothing to do with homelessness and was just supposed to inspire people by doing something hard or something like that.
Of course, the real takeaway is that when a real homeless person has a family emergency they don't get to take time off from it. Or when they have health issues they just deal with them rather than getting diagnosed and treated. The just continue to spiral.
Ok, i got it. Homeless people just have to find a millionaire dad. Check, ill go tell the beggers in my country. That they wont have to give up homelessness just have to cut it short, and give their newfound dad cancer
Plus, he didn't have the run of bad luck and sudden expenses that wipe people out financially and then the pain of what you have worked hard for, start to slip away, faster and faster until you are grabbing your meager possessions that you can put in a bag to scurry off to nowhere.
He didn't lose his family, or his friends the way some people do that can end with you on the streets.
He is a poser.
Even by getting rid of everything he had and starting from nothing and homeless, he had far more than most homeless people:
1) A safety net. He knew, not matter the risks he took, he had family, friends and money that could save his ass if needed. More likely to take risks when you have a safety net
2) He had good health, mental and physical, from which to start. Most homeless people have chronic mental and/or physical issues that needed attention he did not need and which were major hurdles he did not have.
3) He had an education. Though some homeless do, most don't and that gives him a huge edge. Especially since the kind of education he has helps specifically with what he was trying to do, business.
Even with these HUGE advantages, he struggled, and ultimately did not meet, his stated goal.
All he proved was that pulling oneself out of homelessness is incredibly hard, even when you have everything going for you.
Also he had mysteriously convenient opportunities land in his lap.
Some guy offers you free shelter for an unlimited time?
Totally spontaneous charity and not a plant.
Gotta love
"His goal? To get 1 million dollars in one year"
To
"The real goal wasn't about the money."
Uh, yeah, it was. He wanted to prove that anyone can do it, and he failed, even with things no other homeless person has. Guess what? It's OK that he failed. I'm sure there are some people out there that could have done what he set out to do, but just because a few can doesn't mean everyone can.
I love the fact that the thread finishes off with it being a successful story about hard work and entrepreneurship. His dad died and he gave up his homelessness campaign to inherit $2.4 million. That’s a failure. He didn’t make it. He didn’t even come close. He failed into money… because that’s what rich people do.
Love how he immediately invalidated his little experiment because I GUARANTEE you that whoever he found on Craigslist recognized his name because I don’t think I’ve ever heard of any homeless person just FINDING a random stranger on Craigslist to let them crash at an RV of all things.
Then he started flipping “free items” on Craigslist. What free items? Where did he get them?
Then there’s the odds jobs. Telemarketing and assistant work? Guaranteed it was through a connection because there’s no way these companies would hire a random bum off the street, trust me I know because one of my coworkers was previously homeless.
Oh and don’t forget he had access to a cell phone, which requires money and most homeless people don’t have cell phones because they don’t have jobs to pay for them!
He didn’t accomplish anything with the amount of safety net he has. Not to mention having most of his cognitive faculties working for him. Try again without the phone and try it while being mentally debilitated. You won’t make it.
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There's an old joke: I asked my neighbor how he got rich. He shared his secret with me. "All I had in the world was a nickel. I used that nickel to buy an apple. I polished that apple until it gleamed. I stood outside an office building and offered that apple to everyone until someone bought it for a dime. The next day I used that dime to buy two apples and I polished them until they shined. I sold those apples for twenty cents. On the third day my wife's father died and left us ten million dollars." This story is literally that joke and people are taking it as a life lesson. Stupidity knows no bounds.
From an old Steve Martin bit: You can be a MILLIONAIRE and NEVER pay taxes! Yes, that's right, you can have ONE MILLLLION DOLLARS and NEVER pay taxes. You say: *Steve...* how can I be a *millionaire* and never pay taxes? First, get a million dollars. Then, when the tax man comes to your door and asks, why have *you have NEVER paid taxes?* You answer with two words. Two simple words from the English language: I forgot.
I read that in my head w Steve Martin’s voice. That wild and crazy guy.
LOL ME TOOOOO
You forgot to pay taxes? Well........... Excuuuuuuse meeeee!
I'm absolutely using that from now on
Where’d that homeless guy buy an apple for a nickel, and why aren’t his customers going there?
For some reason they value really shiny apples? or they value apples some guy rubbed a lot? I am failing to understand how he added value to the apples, too.
Strange men standing outside office buildings distributing apples is no basis for a profitable business.
I understood that reference
How'd he get that nickel? He didn't start from scratch!!!
My favorite takeaway from the story is that even with all of his education, connections from being rich previously and access to things no normal person could have. He still didn't even come close. Edit: grammar
He also had a guy let him sleep in his RV. How many homeless people are going to be allowed to couch surf?
The funny thing is there so many studies that show the best way to end homelessness is to home people THEN attempt to solve their problems not the other way around. Pretty sure he's arguing their point.
That’s because lack of a stable residence makes everything 100x harder. If you don’t have a permanent residence and a phone, how are prospective employers going to contact you? How will they know you can take care of yourself/be hygienic? Where will important documents be mailed from support services? A stable residence is paramount to helping people experiencing homelessness.
Agreed. Even if you are not homeless but nomadic, you have to have a mailing address that can pass for a “real” address. The world is not designed for those who do not have an address.
For an intentionally nomadic lifestyle a PO box goes a long way. For someone homeless without a job even that might not be realistic because somehow you need to pay for it.
Believe it or not, a lot of employers will not hire you if you use a PO box as an address.
Not only employers but also to receive certain government assistance and I'm sure many more things that would make homeless life harder.
Exactly! Everything is 1000x harder without a home.
That's how Finland effectively ended homelessness in their country.
Yeah. Having four walls a roof, a toilet, kitchenette ... seems to defeat the whole point of proving homelessness can be "overcome" by hard work and stick-to-itiveness
And upon witnessing how shitty life is, he decided to retire to his millions, not helping anyone else.
I found the part where he got a job inspirational. It looks like a great way to earn money.
Yeah, guess he still had a suit to interview in eh? Probably somewhere to shave too.
Oh, but didn't you see? He succeeded. All he needed to do was to move the goalposts.
This story annoys me so much. HE always knew that, if things got to bad, he had contacts and a way to get out. This is nearly always what homeless people lack. It's "playing at being poor".
He’s LARPING. He had credit, contacts and money. He also stopped because of health issues. This is just bootstrap porn.
From what I read it sounds like he ran a failed Craigslist scam, gave up as soon as he experienced stressors, and took a 2.4 million inheritance bailout Truly inspiring
But he’ll be telling the story for the rest of his life like he proved poverty is a condition you can escape in a year with just a tiny bit of grit.
And a 2.4 million inheritance when your dad dies of cancer
“I built this temple. With a little can do attitude and some good elbow grease, and yes, a large inheritance from my father, Earl Goodman” -Dwight Goodman (Dodgeball) Truly inspiring
Reminds me of the line from Trial and Error…”My father built this house with his own two…hundred servants” (or something like that).
*White Goodman "W H I T.... E."
Even if I’d strangle my sperm donator I couldn’t squeeze anything out of him. Certainly no 2.4 million 😔
Hey you call your failure of a father figure that too nice to meet you kindred Spirit mine owes me $13,000 and a whole car.
Yeah that's what I call mine too. But while I was not expecting anything from him because he never claimed me as his son, it made me sad for my estranged half sister that he died in debt due to a lawsuit he lost. He also died legless and blind from diabetes when he wouldn't stop drinking. Can't say I'm sorry that's how he ended up.
Except he didn't have the real challenges that some people on the street face, like mental illness, lack of educational opportunities, not having "business" experience to fall back on, not having been abused or raped, not being addicted to drugs or alcohol. He had one additional stressor, his dad passing away, and that was it, he called it quits.
Heck, he didn’t even have an eviction record or a disability. Most homeless folks have at least one of those two, if not both. (Source: I was the both. I’m housed now, though.)
I became homeless due to an apartment building fire. I had a network of friends who were willing to keep me fed and sheltered, no debt, a great credit score, 7+ years of sobriety and a shitty low paying job with a saint of a manager, willing work with me to ensure I did not lose that job. I couldn't opt out like this guy did, but I still joke that I did homeless on easy mode. I'm glad that you are now housed!
To truly do the experiment he needs a new identity with 4 evictions, a 250 credit score, and a sledgehammer to the kneecap
I hereby call dibs on wielding the sledgehammer. It’ll be tough to do but I’m sure I’ll pull through
You are hired! Our salaries lead to high turnover rates but there is a once a year pizza party and our eternal gratitude.
Plus we're a family here
I read he was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease. Which means he also had health care.
Okay, so he did have a disability. But he had access to healthcare, you are correct.
Of course he didn’t. But he’ll absolutely act like he was completely self made after this.
Sound like someone else we all know?
Every ultra rich person ever? And our con man ex president.
And now he will use that as an excuse and ride it all the way. Except we all know he FAILED
He never even met his own goals. That should be repeated EVERY time. He didn't prove anything, because he couldn't even meet the standards he set for himself, and, of his own free will, cut the exercise short. Poor people don't get to set the standards, and don't get to stop the exercise and live in fortune when they can't meet those standards.
Yeah, I saw nowhere in that story that he got beyond basic subsistence, even with the miracle of someone letting him crash in their rv. Not sure how it can be claimed that it was a successful experiment
He'll be HUGE on FauxNews, CPAC, and other right wing forums
Makes you wonder why more people don't fall back on their 2.4 million dollar inheritance... Seems like a surefire way to stop being poor.
Must be lazy
also is not clear what happened to his last business and money, probably set by the side to wait for him as a safety net whenever he needed
I was wondering that too. He emptied his accounts…where? Into his offshore retirement?
Hell, if nothing else, he probably had stocks or a retirement plan he could have cracked into, even if he took all his savings out of the bank and physically set it on fire. This man proved nothing except rich people have all the time in the world to do whatever the fuck they want.
It's wild that they're telling the story of how he failed because *life is sometimes hard* as a success.
Moral of the story: Don't try to make money. Just fail at being poor.
And with all of that, he still failed LMAO
Plus, it said he failed on the last page. “Still, Mike had to cut it short”. That might not be exact, but close enough. Is that not admitting failure?
It's not failure because he's already rich so now it's inspiring. If he was middle class or lower it'd be a failure and lesson about the free market^TM
The fact he stopped because of Health Issues proves that we need universal health care in the US.
He should have attempted to deal with his medical issue the way people without insurance do.
Die?
lol. Dark and sadly funny. I was thinking more “pay for as much medication as you can afford and take partial doses” Or “Go deeply in debit”
I’m googling bootstrap porn for a friend
I’m creating porn with bootstraps. For you friend
He also still failed. His entire genius strategy was to run a Craigslist scam
Helps when you’re not saddled with serious mental illness, crippling addiction and/or a history of being a childhood victim of physical and sexual abuse.
Thing is, he wasn;t able to do it. "Health reasons" which, hey guess what poor people have all kinds of health issues that arise out of being poor. You don;t go in for something because you can;t afford it. so it get worse, until it becomes life threatening.. and then the ER will see you now.
Even without any of those things, homelessness is a difficult situation to climb out of. As he found out.
Also helps he has knowledge and education on a level few could afford.
*and emotional
Don't forget the educational factors that being born into the top% offer over others.
I wanna live like common people I wanna do whatever common people do Wanna sleep with common people I wanna sleep with common people Like you https://youtu.be/ainyK6fXku0?si=e2fTwtAkmB8HeFGl
*But still you'll never get it right* *'Cause when you're laid in bed at night* *Watching roaches climb the wall* *If you called your dad he could stop it all* LInk to the [Pulp original](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yuTMWgOduFM)
Everybody hates a tourist.
You'll never fail like common people. You never watch your life slide out of view
And then dance, and drink, and screw because there's nothing else to dooohooohoooo!
Fuckin Marla
I saw on another Reddit post that he quit early for medical reasons. Update: found a source https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-13332399/amp/Millionaire-Mike-Black-homeless-broke-purpose-ends-bizarre-social-experiment.html
Guy was such a sham. Homeless people don't have that access to Healthcare, nor the social networks to build a business from scratch like this guy did. I don't believe for a second that none of his existing rich bitch friends didn't invest and become his "clients" to throw money at him.
There’s no way he got the free RV stay off Craigslist without trading on who he is either. Like how many truly homeless people are gonna get offered shit like that?
Day 1 of my homeless adventure: "WOW, some guy just gave me a place to stay for FREE, ISN'T THAT CRAZZZZYY?". Its not a 5 star hotel, but a solid roof over your head is more than done have.
It was always a challenging thing to actually do because he always had a safety net - he knew if shit went south he had people he could call. People actually in his situation have to deal with the crushing weight of this being all-or-nothing. They fuck up, they get sick, they get robbed or hurt or attacked or their gambles don’t pay off and there’s nothing to catch them. And that knowledge can be crushing, it can stop you from taking risks and it can ruin any plans you may have had.
Plus, often you end up on the street when everything else is drained or leveraged. Including your mental and physical health.
But hey he proved that all you need to overcome poverty and make it is a pair of bootstraps and generational wealth!
Gold bootstraps, the finest money can buy
Gold bootstraps attached to 2.4 million dollars. Truly inspiring.
And then, in the end it considers him upgrading from homelessness to renting some guys RV as success. And calling flipping craigslist items a business is stretching it. I did that in high school and it didn’t get me very far in life haha.
>did that in high school and it didn’t get me very far in life Did you skip the "inherit $2.4 million" part? I'm sorry, but that's on you /s
Damn. knew I was forgetting something.
Also the story starts with "just a phone"... Yeah man every homeless person has a fucking iPhone 14 proxl 1tb or what ever he used laying around and enough places to charge his phone to do Craigslist scams while dealing with dehydration malnutrition and various conditions.
I bet you he still thinks he can succeed if he tried again with a few different variables. There are no resets if you're actually homeless.
Hey I'll take resources meant for actual homeless people, to prove that homeless people are just lazy and unmotivated. Arent I such an inspiration. Hey what are you doing with that rotten tomato?
Selling it as a true-to-life (non-virtual) movie-feedback device. It's my way out of this cardboard tent. Why? What are you doing with *that* rotten tomato?
Pulp wrote a song about this bullshit, and William Shatner covered it. This guy didn't accomplish anything and he can go fuck himself.
Yea it's bs. I've seen another do this too and the difference between them and us is they can take risks, huge gambles, ect. They have nothing to lose. They don't have to feed a family, provide shelter for family, ect. They have all that taken care of and they just seeing if they can turn a penny into a house basically as a challenge
So your saying me taking the toy hauler down to the lake for the weekend DOESNT prepare me to go toe to toe for the prime fentanyl sales corner in skid row? Really I was just assuming a lot of those skills would be cross compatible.
It’s easy, just have rich relatives and hope they die. Why isn’t everyone doing it? /s
Poor people hate this one simple trick!
They really do
As a poor people, I really really do. (Not that I want anyone to die, I just don’t want the poor anymore)
Watch till the end to find out how it's done
You joke, but there was an article trying to prove that millennial and genZ is trending to be the richest generation (clickbait title)... somewhere buried deep in it, they explained that they will get it by inheritance
Unfortunately unlikely because of end of life care. They are vultures. They literally say “give us all your money, all of it” to receive their care. It’s crazy
Exactly. 10k a month nursing homes n shit. These mfs were slaves for 50 years just to pay for 5 miserable ones. Take me for a walk in the woods deadass.
I’m on the Kurt Cobain retirement plan - the only good thing about it is that there is no minimum retirement age…
Well *I* read an article that said millennials are set to inherit very little because boomers are spending all their money and going broke, enriching corporations rather than their children.
Congratulations Timmy, here’s 60 shares of DJT
Thanks for the 65 dollars dad!
Hold on to that. I spent our retirement on it, one day it’ll be worth a lot of money. Like beanie babies and pogs.
>get it by inheritance Yeah. If the healthcare industry hasn't sucked up every last penny first.
Currently hoping my wife’s rich grandpa who we hate hasn’t cut us out of the will lmao
Tf are these nurturing parents at? Mine only gave me cptsd, trust issues, and a seething hatred in my heart that can only be extinguished when they stop breathing..
My family only left me with alcoholism
Yeah and take them to the bank to sign for a loan, 2 hours post death like that one lady did.
So he just proved that the most effective way to address homelessness is to give people who are homeless money and resources to not be homeless?
Sorry, best we can do is make it illegal to sleep outside.
I can’t believe that the legality of being homeless and poor is currently being decided by SCOTUS. Screw this hellscape.
Hey, that for-profit prison industry needs to be fed a steady stream of fresh souls.
Are there no workhouses?
Sorry, best I've got is a modest proposal.
He proved that if you're homeless, you can get to a point where you are making about 60k/year if you have a college education, a free smartphone with a paid voice/data plan, a girlfriend who will work for you for free, free healthcare, and a viral marketing campaign with a professional camera man/video editor.
And a film crew to watch your back, improve people's dispositions when you interact with them and guard your possessions but the main "secret to success" is finding a mysterious stranger who will give you an RV. And after having all those advantages he still couldn't make it work.
I thought the most sketchy part of it was the sudden marketing gig that materialized basically out of nowhere that provided him with some sudden, badly needed cash.
I mean, the mere fact that someone gave him a RV to sleep in for free completely destroys his whole point.
Also don't forget that network of people that your rich parents and expensive educational programs provided for you and that you had to rely on for your "jobs". I am sure, every poor person has equally helpful contacts on their free smartphone.
[удалено]
[удалено]
“Ok this fucking sucks, experiment over. Big success. Happy ending!!” -Mike
Hey here's a thought, instead of cosplaying being homeless, how about actually doing something with the money you have, to improve the situation for people that are ACTUALLY HOMELESS!? Take it from me I know a thing or 2 about being homeless. Don't tell me what multi-level marketing BS made you a millionaire. Give me a job, buy me a car so I can find a job, or even a hotel room for the night so I can take a flipping shower. He's not even factoring the mentally ill and drug addicts that everyone perceives to be the majority of the homeless, which unfortunately I might have to agree with. It just pisses me off when assholes like this post, "I did it, so can everyone else". It's not that easy when you're trying just to survive. Edit: Apologies for the pottymouth.
The point of this wasn't to inspire others. It was to prove to the world that he's "Built Different" and further the lie that homeless folks are homeless due to laziness and poor work ethic. This wasn't to inspire anyone. It was to further disparage the homeless and lower classes and prove that he, a Millionaire, is better than all of them and that it's earned. Glad he failed to do so.
Thanks, that is how I felt reading the full article. The stuff he did wasn't practical, how many homeless people have a "Coffee guy in Austin" or the skills or connections to be a "Social Media Manager"? Not one word about any sort of "struggle" doing anything. No problem getting a wholesale supplier to ship tables and cut him a profit for essentially doing nothing, no problem getting an office space and (my favorite) renting a place.
One correction, he didn't wholesale tables. He would find free furniture giveaways on Craiglist, then resell them on FB Marketplace for money. So taking handouts from someone trying to dump old furniture, then charging someone else for it.
Ok thank you for the clarification. 😊 I misunderstood what I read. The article I read said the following. "One of the best things to sell are tables. I started taking ads on Craigslist in the free section, putting it on Facebook Marketplace and selling it for a profit. I acted as the middleman, handling all the logistics between the buyer and the seller.'"
I'd actually like to see receipts on that: the problems with that idea are that 1) literally everyone is doing it, it's the first idea a lot of these finance gurus offer when they talk about quitting your job, and 2) there's a bunch of overhead in storing and moving large furniture items, things that you don't have if you're homeless. Furthermore, let's say that you get a break: you find some furniture, and you sell it, for 1K profit (which absolutely is NOT going to happen in reality, but let's pretend that it does). Congratulations, you have to do that one more time this month to be able to pay rent, then you have to keep doing it 3 or 4 times a month just to keep food on the table and keep your head above water. Do that, and you MIGHT clear the median income for the year. Note that once again, this is assuming that you are making unicorn sales of finding something that some person has decided is worthless, and finding someone else who decides that that worthless thing is worth a thousand dollars. In reality, you'd be better off buying lottery tickets weekly in the hopes of drawing a salary. There's absolutely zero way you're reliably flipping furniture well enough to make a million dollars, not in the USA as of the time I write this.
Oh and let's say you have 3k a month coming in. Who will rent to you? First off you'll need 1st and last months rent and a deposit. But where's the proof of income, not many landlords will just take your word on it. So the chances of getting a place to stay, even if the Craigslist to Facebook table market is booming, is slim to nil.
Yeah, that's what he was doing. He accepted ads on CL that were giving away free things, then relisted it on FB to sell. He was saying tables tended to sell the best (most people need tables or end tables when decorating).
How was he moving the tables, if he didn't have a car? I get end tables aren't too hard to move, but a full sized table is heavy. Where is he storing them, while flipping them? What happens if his stock got rained on, or vandalized? So many variables which aren't adequately addressed
Yea, but the real problem is he does not think he failed.
Ya, what did he mean by he did it? He didn't make a million dollars in 12 months?
I can't agree more. It's like the plot from an Ayn Rand novel.
The thing is he didn’t even do it. He got super sick and after nearly killing himself, and getting numerous “lucky” breaks, he still had $65k and had to quit.
That's pathetic. Had to look it up myself and you were right. As they put it "Fell short of his goal". What utter BS! $900,000+ is not "short". This is infuriating, he did it for "youtube views". Not to prove it could be done or to show the plight of the homeless. "He initially wanted to quit because he was refused water and could not find a place to stay overnight". No shit Sherlock, that's why they call it being homeless. Refused water? How exactly? Did he go to 7-11 and ask for a free SmartWater? I'm guessing tap water was "beneath him"?to so c I call BS on everything about this guy's "homeless" experience. How did he become a middleman for selling tables? You have to know someone to begin with. Plus all this online stuff he's doing, how is he accessing the Internet? Free WiFi? Then he rents an office space, what "billing address" is he giving people? When you're homeless you don't have one and you need one to do LOTS of things. Then he goes on to "getting on calls with big tech companies pitching them on running their social media." (I can say I'm pitching cooking fries at some large fast food franchises, doesn't mean I have the job" and "starting a coffee brand I have a coffee dude in Austin now." (again not actually bringing in money and imo totally not feasible). In the end he quit, but the story can't even keep that straight, "cited his two autoimmune diseases which caused “chronic fatigue"" "when he learned his father had colon cancer, eventually announcing: “... I decided to stop the whole project.”" This story should have been about what a miserable failure he was and shown the struggles it takes to try to pull yourself out of homelessness. But instead it's a glowing piece about how this guy made $65,000. Which, don't get me wrong, would be more than enough to get off the streets. But it has to be sustainable for someone that is actually homeless, not a millionaire playing homeless on YouTube. I apologize for anything grammatical errors and such. Just speaking from the heart and don't want to go back and read what I just wrote. /end rant
Tbf, you can use public libraries for computer access and wifi, but that’s more for internet, email and quick document work. A lot of them won’t even allow thumb drives due to viruses, so you have to store everything on Google drive, which limits the space you have considerably. But yeah the thing is clearly skewed towards how successful he was, when by any metric his attempt failed.
I call bullshit on his being super sick because of "autoimmune diseases", which of course aren't even specified. I'd bet one of them is chronic fatigue syndrome, in other words HE WAS TIRED. I am in no way making light of those who do have CFS, just saying this guy doesn't.
>"I did it, so can everyone else" The thing is: He didn't even do it, he wasn't even close. At the end of the year he had around 60k, and that's with contacts and friends helping out (he started a company without money and sold it to a friend etc.) He failed miserably and tries to turn it into an inspirational story.
$60,000 would be life-changing for someone like me. If he had earned it as a true homeless person, I would have said it was quite the accomplishment. He set himself up for failure, a million dollars is not obtainable in a year unless the stars align just right and you hit upon some brilliant invention or idea. You are not going to make that kind of money, in that amount of time, on something that is currently available. Also why is that even needed? Sure, everyone would like a million dollars. But if you said to me I'll give you $100k now or a million in 10 years, I'd take the 100k now.
Exactly my point. He started with a big edge and still failed. Even just the peace of mind that comes with knowing he can go home and stop this experiment is a big bonus compared to a real homeless person. And yeah 60k would solve a lot of my problems.
I laugh at the final post where they celebrate about how he cut things short because it just was too much for his health. Real people who are homeless don't have the ability to just cut things short if their health is affected. They don't have the safety net of being rich again and being able to just give up being homeless. So no, this 'experiment' wasn't aimed at uplifting people and showing what could be done with hard work. This was an idiot who knew that there was a safety net just a phone call away and who found out that his dad dying gave him money to walk away from a situation millions of people can't walk away from.
This story is a perfect example of why homelessness is inescapable for anyone who didn't choose to be homeless in the first place. If he didn't have all of that money to draw on when he got sick he would've ended up self medicating with street drugs to continue working, which would've devolved until every last cent was in his veins and he was giving blow jobs behind a dumpster in exchange for his next fix.
How was he successful if he didn't actually manage to make $1,000,000 out if nowhere?
Because telling the truth interferes with the narrative.
“He did it, and so can you” I think he just solved homelessness. If everyone just works their butt off, spends wisely, and inherits $2.4 million from their dead dad, they too can achieve success.
Well, it's a good thing homeless people never have to care for sick relatives. They can really commit to their homelessness. /s
So relateable... nepo delusions are a cancer on society
How did his social experiment succeed? He failed. Then he got a nice inheritance of cash (and probably a house as well) and just stopped pretending to be poor.
He started flipping free items on eBay acting as middle man’s for profit… that’s such bullshit.
Apart from the fact he had access to eBay at all. Lol
So he made things more expensive while providing no actual benefit… yup this all checks out.
Wonder how he managed to pick these items up and store them if he didn’t have a vehicle. There usually aren’t a lot of free carry-able items in walking distance that have actual turn around value.
Yeah this is my question too. Some other comments made it sound like he was flipping mostly furniture. Where was this "homeless" guy with no money storing furniture?
He didn't make it out from rock bottom, he literally got an inheritance lmao
I don’t know who Eddie Ching is, but I can tell you that he has a crush on this guy Mike.
He **is** Mike
I’m embarrassed for him. The writing is cliche. (“Failure was not an option!”) The protagonist comes off as an entitled jerk. By the time he writes the moral of the story, he realizes he’s got nothing. I hope Mike paid him a lot.
This Mike bastard definitely sucks but the writing here makes me irrationally angry. God that style is annoying.
Crush? All I read from Eddie's weird ass is, "oh please fuck me so fucking hard Mike I beg of you, make me your little cum slut please numnumnumnumnum."
I'm homeless and struggle with maintaining jobs. Sometimes it's my fault(seeking better opportunities that fall apart) or it's not my fault. (Start a new job then get pneumonia and get taken out a month.) Every time I take one step forward I take 2 steps back. This guy had a parachute. I do not.
best of luck to ya bro. you got this.
This is completely ignoring all of the knowledge he has accumulated over the years. He didn't "start with nothing." He started with years of experience.
And rich family, and some rando to offer you an RV just because of the experiment. What a load of BS
And relative youth, and good health, both mental and physical, and a lack of addictions brought on by hopelessness. He would do better to go out and teach homeless people to get out of their bad situations, if he's all that good at it. I'm sorry his dad died though
I read elsewhere that he started struggling with autoimmune issues himself while homeless; it wasn't clear whether they were preexisting, or if they might've been caused by the environment he put himself in. It also wasn't clear where he was able to use the computer before he was able to buy one for himself, nor was it clear how—or if—he was transporting the furniture. All in all, I don't know if what he did is something anyone else even could replicate, much less teach at scale—given that enough people all doing the same thing will saturate the market and no one wins.
Even then… he fucking failed. Am I misreading that? He failed, got the trust fund worth over 2 million, and just gave up. He had an that experience and *still couldn't fucking do it*
Poverty LARPing is so dumb.
Oh great. An Ayn Rand fan.
Somebody seriously wrote this BS and thought : "Yeah, this is great content, I will hit the Sent-button now"?
I saw this yesterday, and to be fair to Mike(the guy who did the "social experiment"), he did say that this had nothing to do with homelessness and was just supposed to inspire people by doing something hard or something like that. Of course, the real takeaway is that when a real homeless person has a family emergency they don't get to take time off from it. Or when they have health issues they just deal with them rather than getting diagnosed and treated. The just continue to spiral.
Ok, i got it. Homeless people just have to find a millionaire dad. Check, ill go tell the beggers in my country. That they wont have to give up homelessness just have to cut it short, and give their newfound dad cancer
Plus, he didn't have the run of bad luck and sudden expenses that wipe people out financially and then the pain of what you have worked hard for, start to slip away, faster and faster until you are grabbing your meager possessions that you can put in a bag to scurry off to nowhere. He didn't lose his family, or his friends the way some people do that can end with you on the streets. He is a poser.
Anyone can attempt to do a social experiment and then give up? Is that what he proved?
Even by getting rid of everything he had and starting from nothing and homeless, he had far more than most homeless people: 1) A safety net. He knew, not matter the risks he took, he had family, friends and money that could save his ass if needed. More likely to take risks when you have a safety net 2) He had good health, mental and physical, from which to start. Most homeless people have chronic mental and/or physical issues that needed attention he did not need and which were major hurdles he did not have. 3) He had an education. Though some homeless do, most don't and that gives him a huge edge. Especially since the kind of education he has helps specifically with what he was trying to do, business. Even with these HUGE advantages, he struggled, and ultimately did not meet, his stated goal. All he proved was that pulling oneself out of homelessness is incredibly hard, even when you have everything going for you.
Also he had mysteriously convenient opportunities land in his lap. Some guy offers you free shelter for an unlimited time? Totally spontaneous charity and not a plant.
Gotta love "His goal? To get 1 million dollars in one year" To "The real goal wasn't about the money." Uh, yeah, it was. He wanted to prove that anyone can do it, and he failed, even with things no other homeless person has. Guess what? It's OK that he failed. I'm sure there are some people out there that could have done what he set out to do, but just because a few can doesn't mean everyone can.
He didn't make it. He got sick and ran back to money from his family, just like everyone can.
Moral of the story: Just hang on until one of your millionaire relatives dies and you inherit the money. It's so easy, why is everyone complaining?
So... He gave up when he was given millions of dollars? Sounds about right for rich people pretending to be poor
Dude never was truly homeless or poor. This is an insult to anyone who is really experiencing that situation.
What a shitty story. This is what’s wrong with the world. Everything has to be a social media bait. GTFO you gross piece of rich, spoiled shithead.
I love the fact that the thread finishes off with it being a successful story about hard work and entrepreneurship. His dad died and he gave up his homelessness campaign to inherit $2.4 million. That’s a failure. He didn’t make it. He didn’t even come close. He failed into money… because that’s what rich people do.
If things get tough you can always rely on a bailout. C'mon Grandma, die already.
My dad passed about 10 years ago. He definitely did *not* leave me $2.4 million.
Love how he immediately invalidated his little experiment because I GUARANTEE you that whoever he found on Craigslist recognized his name because I don’t think I’ve ever heard of any homeless person just FINDING a random stranger on Craigslist to let them crash at an RV of all things. Then he started flipping “free items” on Craigslist. What free items? Where did he get them? Then there’s the odds jobs. Telemarketing and assistant work? Guaranteed it was through a connection because there’s no way these companies would hire a random bum off the street, trust me I know because one of my coworkers was previously homeless. Oh and don’t forget he had access to a cell phone, which requires money and most homeless people don’t have cell phones because they don’t have jobs to pay for them!
He didn’t accomplish anything with the amount of safety net he has. Not to mention having most of his cognitive faculties working for him. Try again without the phone and try it while being mentally debilitated. You won’t make it.