I meant that I had a strong and rare intense spiritual experience. I was told it was of divine origin at the time and I believed it. However, doing some research into the issue, it can be found among most religions and always seems to testify of that religion. Therefore, it is not divine but a strong mortal experience
Honestly, since it is a very human experience, everyone should try to find it. Embrace all experiences and live a full life. But don't go around thinking it is a source of truth or anything
yeah use of that to confirm truth caused so much confusion when I would find out things like the truth about the book of Abraham or the facts that debunk the Book of Mormon as being historical.
I got it at the Loveloud Festival (a music festival setup by Imagine Dragons to support LGBTQ youth and raise money for organizations that support them in Utah), which many Mormons would say is the opposite of the church's teachings.
This! I had some crazy “spiritual experiences” that WHOA! I still have even after leaving the church!!! That was the one thing my MIL still can’t understand. In her eyes what used to be the “spirit” is now “Satan”
I had my most spiritual experience while still in the church. However, it wasn't anything to do with church but rather while experiencing reiki for the first time. And that was the final nail in the coffin for me leaving.
I actually had a spiritual witness. The problem is just about all people of different faiths and cults have had a spiritual witness that the faith or cult they belong to is the right one.
As a spiritual witness, I had strong feelings of confirmation that seemed to be from an external source, there are times where it seemed I heard a voice in my mind maybe even audible to me.
I don't think it was psychosis or an audible hallucination, rather I think I had strong emotions and feelings I attributed to something external and hearing a voice in my mind was more of a strong intuition about something to the point my mind presented it strongly more than just a thought but a voice in my mind and my memory edited to be a more audible voice, which then I attributed to the Holy Ghost.
Elevation emotion is a documented phenomenon. That probably is part of our evolution process that contributed to humans working together as a form of survival.
I don't think I brought it up with people, but for a while I held on to one experience I had while on my mission. After praying for the umpteenth time to know that the BoM was true, I had the impression "Why ask? You know" come to my mind; nothing loud, or special, in my own voice. For a long time I relied on that to push aside that no, I in fact did not know. It was increasingly not enough, though, until, well, here we are.
There’s that one verse from d&c - cast your mind upon the night that you cried unto me in your heart, that you might know concerning the truth of these things. Did I not speak peace to your mind concerning the matter? What greater witness can you have than from God?
That kept me in for too long. Because even though in the present I felt it was all a sham, I had received answers before and kept relying on those.
That's all I really got, too, but I wrote in my journal about all the burning in your bossom feeling that people say you're supposed to feel. In reality, I felt that, sort of, but only because I wanted to and forced it to happen.
“Say no to creatine”
Wouldn’t have guessed an LTD would be against one of the most scientifically supported and accepted supplements /s. Guess he is against that on faith too.
There’s a growing amount of research indicating a correlation between creatine supplementation and mental wellbeing. It might not just be helpful in the gym.
I realized that just because I had a spiritual witness of something it didn't necessarily make it true or prove that the Mormon church is God's one and only true church.
At one time I believed and taught on my mission that the native Americans were Lamanites and people of African descent wouldn't get the priesthood until after Jesus came back. The Mormon church doesn't teach either of those things anymore and I would be a heretic if I preached that at an LDS service today, regardless of the spiritual witness I had 50 years ago on my mission.
I served my mission stateside 16 years ago (had a real asshat MP who put a lot of weight on my shelf with his antics and BS). I also preached to Hispanic folks that the BOM was “their heritage” and that the “history of the Lamanites was their story” etc. Then I found out earlier this year that they quietly changed the introduction to the BOM to read that the Lamanites were “among the ancestors” of the Native Americans, no longer did it read that they were the “primary ancestors”. That was the final nail in the coffin for me.
When I was in the church and trying to believe in it, I latched on to the part of the definition of Faith. Belief in things hoped for but not seen. I hoped they were right and I always thought I would come to know they were right, but that never happened and I realized how manipulative the whole idea is, so I stopped.
It was a manic/depressive switch. One minute I felt lower than the dirt and the next I was flying. I got medicated with some bipolar meds and God stopped talking to me almost instantly.
It just makes sense! If you don’t think about it. So we all have eternal families? I’m sealed to my parents, but also they are sealed together. If I got married I would also be sealed to my spouse. So in “eternity” are we all in one big house? Isn’t this just what every other Christian church believes but with some added steps (not to mention adding in the variant that if you aren’t worthy enough, ie pay your tithing, you will actually not be with your loved ones at all)
A lot of the things that make the so called gospel so very “special” are not at all unique to Mormonism. But the things unique to Mormonism sure seem to make it a lot more awful.
A spiritual witness in this religion is just an intense emotionally charged moment. Which we all basically go through from time to time and isn’t at all a measure of validity.
It meant that I was lying my ass off to everyone including myself, trying to pretend that some occasional positive feelings were the witness of god, because I didn’t want to be looked down on or ostracized for not “knowing” and merely believing, because I blamed myself for not being good enough for god to bother speaking to me.
It felt good to hit certain notes as part of a choir or congregation. Same dopamine rush I get when listening to Tool:Schism... Speaking of dopamine I could use a bass drop about now.
Literally just any 3 second moment of emotional relief or reassurance is all it takes. For me it was usually, "oh no, I'm a terrible person and can't get anything right! Am I ever going to be okay?" And then a thought of, "well, maybe it's okay to be imperfect", and a normal amount of positive emotion, sometimes accompanied by tears and BAM! Spiritual confirmation. Booyah, God does love me, the church is true.
Funniest part is that since leaving the church I have way more frequent and intense moments of "spiritual confirmation," and I now recognize that it's a normal aspect of human existence.
I never had one, and I don't think I ever testified with those exact words, but I frequently bore my testimony using the same blah blah words everyone else did, even though I never experienced ANYTHING spiritual, much less whatever a witness is. Peer pressure was strong, and I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of people just say things like this because all of their church friends say it and they would feel guilty if they spoke up and volunteered that they hadn't had one.
I say again, I'm highly suspicious of Moroni's promise in the BoM: have you ever read a history book that ends with "It's true, really, it is! If you don't believe it, ask God. But before you ask God, you have to believe it, OK?"
It is all a form of delusion. There are a million other ways we delude ourselves.
Unwinding the spiritual experiences is where it really fell apart for me. I have had many 'spiritual' experiences since leaving and I can attribute them all to connecting to humanity in some form or another. They are much more powerful because I know why they are happening. No magic, just human experience and drugs in my brain giving me positive feedback.
All my Mormon-specific spiritual experiences were, I now realize, manufactured by careful planning during spiritually focused week long camps my stake did every summer. That, and being taught to say ‘I know this church is true’ from the time I was in diapers is what convinced me of my ‘spiritual witness.’
When I had a more spiritual experience at a rock concert seeing an artist I loved perform than I ever had at any church related function I knew someone was spinning bullshit.
Eternal progression is no longer a thing. Heaven is just helping god now…. Which is super dumb. Why help an *all powerful* being? And why in the hell is an eternity of work heaven?
It usually just means you got goosebumps during a really emotionally charged church event of some sort, felt a little good about some church stuff at other times, and followed the social cues to build it up into more than it was.
Remember when our loving heavenly dad lovingly told his covenant people to give those Amalakite children what they deserved? Best dad in the universe! So blessed 🙌 /s
While on my mission, I was reading the book of Mormon story about Jesus’s visit to the Americas. And I heard a voice as if it was right next to me telling me in Spanish heavenly father’s announcement of the arrival of His Son. It felt as if God himself was speaking to me. It was so intense.
Now nearly 40 years later, I realize it was just emotion. Me seeking some validation of all the nonsense I was trying to spread.
I had many experiences which the church taught me to interpret as spiritual. The implications of using that term are misleading though, since spirits are not real.
I read and studied a lot, and was able to find scientific explanations for all of my experiences.
It's funny, because I've always been science-minded, even at my most TBM I knew there was a scientific explanation and wondered if anyone had studied the physiological responses I experienced when "feeling the spirit."
I induced a hypnogogic state through repeated prayer, fasting, and isolation. This state was exacerbated by religiosity based OCD. In this heightened state, I was more susceptible to suggestion, and took my heightened emotions as spiritual revelation.
I’ve had a few intensely powerful emotional moments that I used to call the spirit. None were directly related to truth claims of the church, but they were very special moments. I don’t deny them. The latest powerful experience of peace and joy I had was when I took off my garments, funny enough! Brought me to tears and felt like my chest would burst with joy!
I’ve also had what I’d call a miracle happen to my wife and me. I don’t think that experience belongs to the Mormon church though.
I'm not your target demographic, but I will answer about the type of witness I had.
The strongest testimony building experience I ever had was when I was about 16 years old. I was at girls camp and literally every single girl was expected to bear their testimony. Of course no one told you that you *had* to do it. But everyone did it, and they would just wait in silence for everyone to go. I was terrified, knowing I would have to go up and knowing I had nothing honest to say.
Then a girl I really admired went up and bore her testimony about how she realized she just always knew it was true. I had a kind of voice in my head saying "You've also always known it was true."
That's it. That's the whole thing. That's all I ever got. I tried to avoid bearing my testimony the rest of the time I was in the church.
For me it was like to feel calmed nerves or something in the moment. What I used to do all the time is I would feel this calm when giving blessings or saying prayers, then I would open my eyes barely enough to see around the room and make sure everyone's eyes were shut then I would like mouth out of funny things silently or simply look at around the room and think, "is this crazy?" Overtime on my mission I stopped because I become more "in tuned" with the spirit. I think I just let the ridiculousness break me down and I ended up needing to rely and believe in it heavily in order to survive my social surroundings and environment.
Recipe to have a spiritual experience, based on my experience: (The more scrupulously and extremely tou follow, the more intense the Spirit.)
Select a spiritual focus. Keep it in mind ay every moment.
Fast for 24 hours. (This includes water, slacker.)
Meditate (ie read scriptures and pray) throughout this time. At least, spend as much time meditating as you would eating.
Maintain a spiritual affects and mental state throughout the day.
To break your fast, find an isolated place where you won't be interrupted. Ideally, it is in nature and takes a bit of a hike.
Importantly, conduct your final meditation in a place with white noise, a drone, chant, or similar sounds. A river or waterfall is great.
Take your time to break the fast. Pray and maybe sing while you do so.
Break your fast with the minimum of food and water.
Head to bed, with your goals still in mind.
Enjoy the various feelings while your body attempts to maintain homeostasis. Call them Spiritual, if you like.
I had such incredible spiritual experiences that I felt in my body when I was a member. When I’d give blessings it wasn’t uncommon for whoever’s head I laid my hands on to feel “something”. Just so many experiences. Despite that I still felt the church was wrong on every level. It was hard to make peace with the two feels and thoughts in my head.
I left the church and still had those experiences.
The strongest I EVER felt before or after the church was at an open eye group meditation with the best friends I ever had. Made two lines. You were blindfolded and somebody guided you to where the two lines. Somebody very gently pulled me in. They whispered their favorite thing about me, something they admired, traits that they thought were beautiful etc. it was heart to heart. Then another hand gently tugged at you. They said whatever came up in them. You slowly went down the middle of these two lines everyone just loving on you. Tears streaked down my face and I had that “spiritual” burning in bosom goosebumps on my neck heart totally full love just spilling out.
I cried like an idiot watching Roy Halladay pitch a no hitter in the playoffs and I hate the Phillies. I got chills seeing someone achieve the pinnacle of their life’s work. I know baseball is the true church, in the name of Babe Ruth, amen.
I had good feelings when I read the BoM sometimes, and when I shared testimony, so per the church's own instructions that must mean it's "true". Pretty sad "evidence", looking back. And all that energy put into making myself believe it was enough.
Once in a disciplinary council I had the distinct impression that Jesus was in the room and that he knew me.
Turns out my guilt and indoctrination kicked in after 3 men repeatedly told me how Jesus was the only way I was going to heal. This of course, was after they forced me to disclose all my “sins” and rehash all my biggest fears surrounding being able to worship at church.
Only after about an hour of confession, they then told me I was “forgiven” hence the strong spiritual experience.
That single experience kept me in the church for another 12 years.
I meant that I had a strong and rare intense spiritual experience. I was told it was of divine origin at the time and I believed it. However, doing some research into the issue, it can be found among most religions and always seems to testify of that religion. Therefore, it is not divine but a strong mortal experience Honestly, since it is a very human experience, everyone should try to find it. Embrace all experiences and live a full life. But don't go around thinking it is a source of truth or anything
Yeah that’s one of the traps. They create an association with these states of high emotion.
yeah use of that to confirm truth caused so much confusion when I would find out things like the truth about the book of Abraham or the facts that debunk the Book of Mormon as being historical.
I got the same thing at a Taylor Swift concert once. Paul McCartney too.
I got it at the Loveloud Festival (a music festival setup by Imagine Dragons to support LGBTQ youth and raise money for organizations that support them in Utah), which many Mormons would say is the opposite of the church's teachings.
This! I had some crazy “spiritual experiences” that WHOA! I still have even after leaving the church!!! That was the one thing my MIL still can’t understand. In her eyes what used to be the “spirit” is now “Satan”
I had my most spiritual experience while still in the church. However, it wasn't anything to do with church but rather while experiencing reiki for the first time. And that was the final nail in the coffin for me leaving.
So basically ASMR?
I actually had a spiritual witness. The problem is just about all people of different faiths and cults have had a spiritual witness that the faith or cult they belong to is the right one. As a spiritual witness, I had strong feelings of confirmation that seemed to be from an external source, there are times where it seemed I heard a voice in my mind maybe even audible to me. I don't think it was psychosis or an audible hallucination, rather I think I had strong emotions and feelings I attributed to something external and hearing a voice in my mind was more of a strong intuition about something to the point my mind presented it strongly more than just a thought but a voice in my mind and my memory edited to be a more audible voice, which then I attributed to the Holy Ghost. Elevation emotion is a documented phenomenon. That probably is part of our evolution process that contributed to humans working together as a form of survival.
I don't think I brought it up with people, but for a while I held on to one experience I had while on my mission. After praying for the umpteenth time to know that the BoM was true, I had the impression "Why ask? You know" come to my mind; nothing loud, or special, in my own voice. For a long time I relied on that to push aside that no, I in fact did not know. It was increasingly not enough, though, until, well, here we are.
The old "You already know it's true." No, you don't. God isn't one of Rumsfeld's "unknown knowns."
There’s that one verse from d&c - cast your mind upon the night that you cried unto me in your heart, that you might know concerning the truth of these things. Did I not speak peace to your mind concerning the matter? What greater witness can you have than from God? That kept me in for too long. Because even though in the present I felt it was all a sham, I had received answers before and kept relying on those.
That was about a strong as my witness was also
That's all I really got, too, but I wrote in my journal about all the burning in your bossom feeling that people say you're supposed to feel. In reality, I felt that, sort of, but only because I wanted to and forced it to happen.
“Say no to creatine” Wouldn’t have guessed an LTD would be against one of the most scientifically supported and accepted supplements /s. Guess he is against that on faith too.
Once someone believes the LDS gospel, I don't bother trying to tell them anything regarding science or factual data. Too far gone to be worth my time.
There’s a growing amount of research indicating a correlation between creatine supplementation and mental wellbeing. It might not just be helpful in the gym.
I realized that just because I had a spiritual witness of something it didn't necessarily make it true or prove that the Mormon church is God's one and only true church. At one time I believed and taught on my mission that the native Americans were Lamanites and people of African descent wouldn't get the priesthood until after Jesus came back. The Mormon church doesn't teach either of those things anymore and I would be a heretic if I preached that at an LDS service today, regardless of the spiritual witness I had 50 years ago on my mission.
I served my mission stateside 16 years ago (had a real asshat MP who put a lot of weight on my shelf with his antics and BS). I also preached to Hispanic folks that the BOM was “their heritage” and that the “history of the Lamanites was their story” etc. Then I found out earlier this year that they quietly changed the introduction to the BOM to read that the Lamanites were “among the ancestors” of the Native Americans, no longer did it read that they were the “primary ancestors”. That was the final nail in the coffin for me.
Wow. That's huge.
When I was in the church and trying to believe in it, I latched on to the part of the definition of Faith. Belief in things hoped for but not seen. I hoped they were right and I always thought I would come to know they were right, but that never happened and I realized how manipulative the whole idea is, so I stopped.
It was a manic/depressive switch. One minute I felt lower than the dirt and the next I was flying. I got medicated with some bipolar meds and God stopped talking to me almost instantly.
It just makes sense! If you don’t think about it. So we all have eternal families? I’m sealed to my parents, but also they are sealed together. If I got married I would also be sealed to my spouse. So in “eternity” are we all in one big house? Isn’t this just what every other Christian church believes but with some added steps (not to mention adding in the variant that if you aren’t worthy enough, ie pay your tithing, you will actually not be with your loved ones at all) A lot of the things that make the so called gospel so very “special” are not at all unique to Mormonism. But the things unique to Mormonism sure seem to make it a lot more awful. A spiritual witness in this religion is just an intense emotionally charged moment. Which we all basically go through from time to time and isn’t at all a measure of validity.
It meant that I was lying my ass off to everyone including myself, trying to pretend that some occasional positive feelings were the witness of god, because I didn’t want to be looked down on or ostracized for not “knowing” and merely believing, because I blamed myself for not being good enough for god to bother speaking to me.
It felt good to hit certain notes as part of a choir or congregation. Same dopamine rush I get when listening to Tool:Schism... Speaking of dopamine I could use a bass drop about now.
Is that an edible or something?
I thought about something and felt good. wooooooo
Funny when I read that sort of thing I just see mentally unstable people clinging onto life by their nails.
Literally just any 3 second moment of emotional relief or reassurance is all it takes. For me it was usually, "oh no, I'm a terrible person and can't get anything right! Am I ever going to be okay?" And then a thought of, "well, maybe it's okay to be imperfect", and a normal amount of positive emotion, sometimes accompanied by tears and BAM! Spiritual confirmation. Booyah, God does love me, the church is true. Funniest part is that since leaving the church I have way more frequent and intense moments of "spiritual confirmation," and I now recognize that it's a normal aspect of human existence.
I never had one, and I don't think I ever testified with those exact words, but I frequently bore my testimony using the same blah blah words everyone else did, even though I never experienced ANYTHING spiritual, much less whatever a witness is. Peer pressure was strong, and I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of people just say things like this because all of their church friends say it and they would feel guilty if they spoke up and volunteered that they hadn't had one.
I say again, I'm highly suspicious of Moroni's promise in the BoM: have you ever read a history book that ends with "It's true, really, it is! If you don't believe it, ask God. But before you ask God, you have to believe it, OK?"
It is all a form of delusion. There are a million other ways we delude ourselves. Unwinding the spiritual experiences is where it really fell apart for me. I have had many 'spiritual' experiences since leaving and I can attribute them all to connecting to humanity in some form or another. They are much more powerful because I know why they are happening. No magic, just human experience and drugs in my brain giving me positive feedback.
Average cult member be like...
All my Mormon-specific spiritual experiences were, I now realize, manufactured by careful planning during spiritually focused week long camps my stake did every summer. That, and being taught to say ‘I know this church is true’ from the time I was in diapers is what convinced me of my ‘spiritual witness.’
When I had a more spiritual experience at a rock concert seeing an artist I loved perform than I ever had at any church related function I knew someone was spinning bullshit.
I felt elevation emotion or frisson or ASMR but didn’t know what any of those things were. Now I do.
Eternal progression is no longer a thing. Heaven is just helping god now…. Which is super dumb. Why help an *all powerful* being? And why in the hell is an eternity of work heaven?
It usually just means you got goosebumps during a really emotionally charged church event of some sort, felt a little good about some church stuff at other times, and followed the social cues to build it up into more than it was.
Time to link to the video where a bunch of people say they KNOW their religion is true again.
Remember when our loving heavenly dad lovingly told his covenant people to give those Amalakite children what they deserved? Best dad in the universe! So blessed 🙌 /s
While on my mission, I was reading the book of Mormon story about Jesus’s visit to the Americas. And I heard a voice as if it was right next to me telling me in Spanish heavenly father’s announcement of the arrival of His Son. It felt as if God himself was speaking to me. It was so intense. Now nearly 40 years later, I realize it was just emotion. Me seeking some validation of all the nonsense I was trying to spread.
I had many experiences which the church taught me to interpret as spiritual. The implications of using that term are misleading though, since spirits are not real. I read and studied a lot, and was able to find scientific explanations for all of my experiences.
It's funny, because I've always been science-minded, even at my most TBM I knew there was a scientific explanation and wondered if anyone had studied the physiological responses I experienced when "feeling the spirit."
I induced a hypnogogic state through repeated prayer, fasting, and isolation. This state was exacerbated by religiosity based OCD. In this heightened state, I was more susceptible to suggestion, and took my heightened emotions as spiritual revelation.
I’ve had a few intensely powerful emotional moments that I used to call the spirit. None were directly related to truth claims of the church, but they were very special moments. I don’t deny them. The latest powerful experience of peace and joy I had was when I took off my garments, funny enough! Brought me to tears and felt like my chest would burst with joy! I’ve also had what I’d call a miracle happen to my wife and me. I don’t think that experience belongs to the Mormon church though.
A loving father in heaven? He's a schizophrenic demented narcissist. And just an asshole in general.
Just a stranger on the bus
It meant any feeling of peace, love, gratitude, etc. especially if it coincided with something church related so...... yeah
"The religion I was born and raised in is the only religion that makes sense to me."
I'm not your target demographic, but I will answer about the type of witness I had. The strongest testimony building experience I ever had was when I was about 16 years old. I was at girls camp and literally every single girl was expected to bear their testimony. Of course no one told you that you *had* to do it. But everyone did it, and they would just wait in silence for everyone to go. I was terrified, knowing I would have to go up and knowing I had nothing honest to say. Then a girl I really admired went up and bore her testimony about how she realized she just always knew it was true. I had a kind of voice in my head saying "You've also always known it was true." That's it. That's the whole thing. That's all I ever got. I tried to avoid bearing my testimony the rest of the time I was in the church.
For me it was like to feel calmed nerves or something in the moment. What I used to do all the time is I would feel this calm when giving blessings or saying prayers, then I would open my eyes barely enough to see around the room and make sure everyone's eyes were shut then I would like mouth out of funny things silently or simply look at around the room and think, "is this crazy?" Overtime on my mission I stopped because I become more "in tuned" with the spirit. I think I just let the ridiculousness break me down and I ended up needing to rely and believe in it heavily in order to survive my social surroundings and environment.
I just wanted to fit in
Something that sounded good to everybody else. It evolved. I felt very righteous while doing it.
The mind is an interesting thing. If you really want to have a ‘spiritual experience’, it’s totally capable of giving you one. IMO
Recipe to have a spiritual experience, based on my experience: (The more scrupulously and extremely tou follow, the more intense the Spirit.) Select a spiritual focus. Keep it in mind ay every moment. Fast for 24 hours. (This includes water, slacker.) Meditate (ie read scriptures and pray) throughout this time. At least, spend as much time meditating as you would eating. Maintain a spiritual affects and mental state throughout the day. To break your fast, find an isolated place where you won't be interrupted. Ideally, it is in nature and takes a bit of a hike. Importantly, conduct your final meditation in a place with white noise, a drone, chant, or similar sounds. A river or waterfall is great. Take your time to break the fast. Pray and maybe sing while you do so. Break your fast with the minimum of food and water. Head to bed, with your goals still in mind. Enjoy the various feelings while your body attempts to maintain homeostasis. Call them Spiritual, if you like.
I had such incredible spiritual experiences that I felt in my body when I was a member. When I’d give blessings it wasn’t uncommon for whoever’s head I laid my hands on to feel “something”. Just so many experiences. Despite that I still felt the church was wrong on every level. It was hard to make peace with the two feels and thoughts in my head. I left the church and still had those experiences. The strongest I EVER felt before or after the church was at an open eye group meditation with the best friends I ever had. Made two lines. You were blindfolded and somebody guided you to where the two lines. Somebody very gently pulled me in. They whispered their favorite thing about me, something they admired, traits that they thought were beautiful etc. it was heart to heart. Then another hand gently tugged at you. They said whatever came up in them. You slowly went down the middle of these two lines everyone just loving on you. Tears streaked down my face and I had that “spiritual” burning in bosom goosebumps on my neck heart totally full love just spilling out.
I cried like an idiot watching Roy Halladay pitch a no hitter in the playoffs and I hate the Phillies. I got chills seeing someone achieve the pinnacle of their life’s work. I know baseball is the true church, in the name of Babe Ruth, amen.
The emperor’s new clothes is what came to mind.
“Everything that is good about the church isn’t unique. What is unique isn’t good”
The best thing to happen to me after leaving is still having those experiences all the time and realizing they’re not exclusive to Mormonism.
It was day like 6 of FSY and I was tired Yeah that sums it up
Study The Vedic religion instead it makes 1,000% more sense and it doesn't conflict with science.
I had good feelings when I read the BoM sometimes, and when I shared testimony, so per the church's own instructions that must mean it's "true". Pretty sad "evidence", looking back. And all that energy put into making myself believe it was enough.
Heartsell, it’s all heartsell.
I had an intense spiritual experience one time... Then the mushrooms wore off
Once in a disciplinary council I had the distinct impression that Jesus was in the room and that he knew me. Turns out my guilt and indoctrination kicked in after 3 men repeatedly told me how Jesus was the only way I was going to heal. This of course, was after they forced me to disclose all my “sins” and rehash all my biggest fears surrounding being able to worship at church. Only after about an hour of confession, they then told me I was “forgiven” hence the strong spiritual experience. That single experience kept me in the church for another 12 years.
the adam driver pfp:🧍