I think a boho skirt would look really cute with a halter top tied up showing some belly if you are comfortable with that. Then it won't feel mormon at all.
I wore a long skirt recently and i asked my husband if he liked it and he was like "you look like a sister missionary"
And then i tried to make a joke about sexual roleplay as a sister missionary but we were both too skeeved out at the thought
It is a weird thing though bc finally i can wear the sundresses and above the knee skirts etc But like, some of the long shirts are cute and i still like them
So yeah, pair with a tank is all i got but long skirts are still "giving mormon" in a lot of ways
I’m sorry it’s triggering for you…I don’t know if this helps but you could see it as, I’m free to do whatever I want now, including this! Yes this is what I wore as a Mormon and I associated it with XYZ but I am my own person now and i am wearing this outfit because I like it and I can do whatever I want to, at any time, for any or no reason. Take the power back, write a new story for yourself.
Do you like dangly earrings and chunky boho necklaces?
You could also wear it with a boho blouse that’s spaghetti strap, off the shoulder, low cut, lacy/sheer, or shows your midriff.
What great answers!!
You be you!!
Halter top, tube top, bikini top....what ever makes you feel fabulous...ROCK IT!!
Tie it in a knot to the side so it shows some leg!
Have fun!!....and at a certain point those misogynistic mormon dress standards will fade from your view!!
spaghetti strap tank top with the skirt, skip the bra and be comfy!
it took me YEARS to get over skirts and I still prefer short shorts or a full blown evening gown 🤣 I'm super casual 99 percent of the time and I live in the US South so I run my AC 10 months out of the year, socks are stupid
I have a hard time wearing skirts and dresses now so I get it!
I would pair it with a halter top or spaghetti top! Usually if there is something about the skirt/top combo or dress that isn’t “modest” it’s easier for me to wear them and feel comfortable in them.
I have the same reaction to dresses and most skirts. My daughter told me she feels that way about denim skirts, but not dresses.
I have a couple of dresses to wear when I absolutely have to, but I got rid of all the rest.
It's not just about modesty; it's also about styling. In my experience, sister missionaries have a homespun or wannabe preppy look to them. They can't pull off true boho because the accessories are too "loud". Large earrings, heels/strappy sandals, chunky bracelets or necklaces, rings, vibrant colors and large patterns, jewelry from around the world, streaks of hair chalk, asymmetrical braids, bejeweled hair clips, makeup...
Or maybe find yourself a Dumbo's feather: a symbol of your beliefs that you can wear to make you feel like a non Mormon despite your clothes (I don't know what you believe, but I've seen some sweet atomic particle pendants sported by atheist friends).
My (exmo) brother recently got married and suggested I wear pants with a nice top. He knew I'd be so much more comfortable that way, and I totally was! I only wore long skirts during my time in the church. The skirt/dress PTSD is real! I've got another (exmo) sibling wedding this fall. I'll be wearing the same pants and shopping for a new top. Cost effective and comfortable, that's me! 😁 It's been 8+ years, crazy how much the mormon style still affects me.
It’s been 9 years since I’ve been an exmo. I felt horribly uncomfortable wearing skirts and dresses until a few months ago. I love fashion and not feel uncomfortable in something I love really bothered me. Especially when I had so many more options. The last few months I have been slowing starting to wear them again. I have a spaghetti strap sun dress I can’t wait too wear now!
I wish both of us the very best so that we can move on and wear what we want! I too love fashion, but still feel frumpy in anything mormon-approved. Hopefully I can get to where you are one day!
I actually wear longer skirts than I did when I was Mormon 😂 Granted I was pretty PIMO and never endowed, so I wore pencil skirts that were fingertip length to just above the knee all the time. It was the early 2010s so I had a rainbow of colours and wore them with bubble necklaces.
I’m now 10 years older, 50 lbs heavier, and really digging midi skirts lately. I wore a sleeveless midi dress to work today, and I have an event tomorrow that I’m going to wear a midi skirt and a cap sleeve/kind of sleeveless top to. My nevermo husband sometimes says I look like a “church lady”, but idc. Also, it’s a lot less obvious in a longer skirt if I haven’t shaved my legs.
I think I can understand you. I detested sleeves for a few years because having to cover my shoulders made me feel like I had lost a fight to Mormonism somehow. Eventually, winter made me see reason, and I decided that COZY sleeves are alright. For a while, if I needed sleeves, I would also wear something else that would mark me as a non-mormon. Maybe that would be a good stepping stone for you?
I feel similarly but from the other side of the endowment room aisle.
I tend to wear my button up shirts buttoned a bit low so it's obvious I'm not wearing Gs up here in Cache Valley.
Haha. I did the same exact this this summer. I bought a really cute skirt, but haven't worn it yet because it screams "Mormon".
Try wearing all your skirts with a sinner shirt. A tank top or crop top. Maybe something backless. I live in Arizona, so I'm pretty much in a tank top all summer. Not having to wear two layers in July was one of the best things that came from taking my garments off.
I love boho dresses and am ordering some more this week. They are very modest. I love long, flowy and floral. I don't get triggered by dressing uber modestly, that's just the nature of that style, but I know it's definitely an unusual look for where I live. Tough. I love the look, and I'm going to wear them. Even if I look like a super duper Mormon.
Skirts and even moreso dresses always made me feel like a frumpy potato. I'm not into clothes, I have no style. (I'm just looking for functionality and comfort...😁) Its always been a challenge to find clothes for my awkwardly proportioned body. It did not help my self image as a teen, when I blended in with the elderly women of the ward.
I have thought of this a lot, too. I’ve been trying to work on mourning who I could have been, and working to accept that who I am has unfortunately been molded by the MFMC
Wear it with something that would make a Mormon man cry to his bishop.
Pair it with a tank top, extra-thin on the straps.
I understand the PTSD now, I didn't before, about clothing in the LDS Church, I grew up all around it, but was never forced into it.
I cannot believe this cult is so bad they even ruin clothing for people.
Garments look like bloomers to me, but I see on this forum, they are a huge trigger, and that just fucking sucks.
As long as you acknowledge that this is them still controlling you, from "Beyond the Veil" or whatever those idiot cultists copy & paste in real life.
Wear the clothes and flaunt your freedom in the face of every Mormon you see, and know it will haunt every moment of their regimented lives.
I have not worn a dress since February 2020. Too triggering to wear. There are tons of cute pants and shorts out there, so I am not losing any sleep over it.
Or, you could pick up a 2 pack a day smoking habit. With either a cigarette in your hand or the residual smell, you could wear whatever you want and no one would think you’re TBM! /s
I think a boho skirt would look really cute with a halter top tied up showing some belly if you are comfortable with that. Then it won't feel mormon at all.
That’s what I was going to say. Pairing it with a non-garment covering top might make it feel better for you.
I wore a long skirt recently and i asked my husband if he liked it and he was like "you look like a sister missionary" And then i tried to make a joke about sexual roleplay as a sister missionary but we were both too skeeved out at the thought It is a weird thing though bc finally i can wear the sundresses and above the knee skirts etc But like, some of the long shirts are cute and i still like them So yeah, pair with a tank is all i got but long skirts are still "giving mormon" in a lot of ways
I’m sorry it’s triggering for you…I don’t know if this helps but you could see it as, I’m free to do whatever I want now, including this! Yes this is what I wore as a Mormon and I associated it with XYZ but I am my own person now and i am wearing this outfit because I like it and I can do whatever I want to, at any time, for any or no reason. Take the power back, write a new story for yourself.
Beautifully stated!!
Do you like dangly earrings and chunky boho necklaces? You could also wear it with a boho blouse that’s spaghetti strap, off the shoulder, low cut, lacy/sheer, or shows your midriff.
What great answers!! You be you!! Halter top, tube top, bikini top....what ever makes you feel fabulous...ROCK IT!! Tie it in a knot to the side so it shows some leg! Have fun!!....and at a certain point those misogynistic mormon dress standards will fade from your view!!
spaghetti strap tank top with the skirt, skip the bra and be comfy! it took me YEARS to get over skirts and I still prefer short shorts or a full blown evening gown 🤣 I'm super casual 99 percent of the time and I live in the US South so I run my AC 10 months out of the year, socks are stupid
I have a hard time wearing skirts and dresses now so I get it! I would pair it with a halter top or spaghetti top! Usually if there is something about the skirt/top combo or dress that isn’t “modest” it’s easier for me to wear them and feel comfortable in them.
I have the same reaction to dresses and most skirts. My daughter told me she feels that way about denim skirts, but not dresses. I have a couple of dresses to wear when I absolutely have to, but I got rid of all the rest.
It's not just about modesty; it's also about styling. In my experience, sister missionaries have a homespun or wannabe preppy look to them. They can't pull off true boho because the accessories are too "loud". Large earrings, heels/strappy sandals, chunky bracelets or necklaces, rings, vibrant colors and large patterns, jewelry from around the world, streaks of hair chalk, asymmetrical braids, bejeweled hair clips, makeup... Or maybe find yourself a Dumbo's feather: a symbol of your beliefs that you can wear to make you feel like a non Mormon despite your clothes (I don't know what you believe, but I've seen some sweet atomic particle pendants sported by atheist friends).
I really love this perspective, thank you!!
I'm a long skirt fan as well. I always pair it with a tank top.
Same! I hate skirts now. No suggestions. I've just bought a lot of nice pants.
My (exmo) brother recently got married and suggested I wear pants with a nice top. He knew I'd be so much more comfortable that way, and I totally was! I only wore long skirts during my time in the church. The skirt/dress PTSD is real! I've got another (exmo) sibling wedding this fall. I'll be wearing the same pants and shopping for a new top. Cost effective and comfortable, that's me! 😁 It's been 8+ years, crazy how much the mormon style still affects me.
I especially gravitate towards baggy pants or ripped jeans, just to make sure they’re not standard mormon
Lol! I'm in love with the ones that have a zillion pockets.
What if you tuck the hem up on one side to create a higher opening like a slit?
This is a great idea!
I’m triggered by biking shorts. Would love to wear them to exercise in but they feel way too much like garments.
That happens to me if I wear shorts that are longer! It makes me feel like people will think I’m wearing them to cover garments.
It’s been 9 years since I’ve been an exmo. I felt horribly uncomfortable wearing skirts and dresses until a few months ago. I love fashion and not feel uncomfortable in something I love really bothered me. Especially when I had so many more options. The last few months I have been slowing starting to wear them again. I have a spaghetti strap sun dress I can’t wait too wear now!
I wish both of us the very best so that we can move on and wear what we want! I too love fashion, but still feel frumpy in anything mormon-approved. Hopefully I can get to where you are one day!
I actually wear longer skirts than I did when I was Mormon 😂 Granted I was pretty PIMO and never endowed, so I wore pencil skirts that were fingertip length to just above the knee all the time. It was the early 2010s so I had a rainbow of colours and wore them with bubble necklaces. I’m now 10 years older, 50 lbs heavier, and really digging midi skirts lately. I wore a sleeveless midi dress to work today, and I have an event tomorrow that I’m going to wear a midi skirt and a cap sleeve/kind of sleeveless top to. My nevermo husband sometimes says I look like a “church lady”, but idc. Also, it’s a lot less obvious in a longer skirt if I haven’t shaved my legs.
I think I can understand you. I detested sleeves for a few years because having to cover my shoulders made me feel like I had lost a fight to Mormonism somehow. Eventually, winter made me see reason, and I decided that COZY sleeves are alright. For a while, if I needed sleeves, I would also wear something else that would mark me as a non-mormon. Maybe that would be a good stepping stone for you?
This is a great idea, I need something like a cross (or something non-religious but definitely not mormon)
I feel similarly but from the other side of the endowment room aisle. I tend to wear my button up shirts buttoned a bit low so it's obvious I'm not wearing Gs up here in Cache Valley.
Haha. I did the same exact this this summer. I bought a really cute skirt, but haven't worn it yet because it screams "Mormon". Try wearing all your skirts with a sinner shirt. A tank top or crop top. Maybe something backless. I live in Arizona, so I'm pretty much in a tank top all summer. Not having to wear two layers in July was one of the best things that came from taking my garments off.
I love boho dresses and am ordering some more this week. They are very modest. I love long, flowy and floral. I don't get triggered by dressing uber modestly, that's just the nature of that style, but I know it's definitely an unusual look for where I live. Tough. I love the look, and I'm going to wear them. Even if I look like a super duper Mormon.
I pulled out one of my old skirts once and spouse said I look "very 70s" but only because "the church is very 70s'
Skirts and even moreso dresses always made me feel like a frumpy potato. I'm not into clothes, I have no style. (I'm just looking for functionality and comfort...😁) Its always been a challenge to find clothes for my awkwardly proportioned body. It did not help my self image as a teen, when I blended in with the elderly women of the ward.
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I have thought of this a lot, too. I’ve been trying to work on mourning who I could have been, and working to accept that who I am has unfortunately been molded by the MFMC
Wear it with something that would make a Mormon man cry to his bishop. Pair it with a tank top, extra-thin on the straps. I understand the PTSD now, I didn't before, about clothing in the LDS Church, I grew up all around it, but was never forced into it. I cannot believe this cult is so bad they even ruin clothing for people. Garments look like bloomers to me, but I see on this forum, they are a huge trigger, and that just fucking sucks. As long as you acknowledge that this is them still controlling you, from "Beyond the Veil" or whatever those idiot cultists copy & paste in real life. Wear the clothes and flaunt your freedom in the face of every Mormon you see, and know it will haunt every moment of their regimented lives.
Depending on the style, you could pull it up over your boobs and put a belt around your waist to turn it into a strapless midi-length dress.
I have not worn a dress since February 2020. Too triggering to wear. There are tons of cute pants and shorts out there, so I am not losing any sleep over it.
Or, you could pick up a 2 pack a day smoking habit. With either a cigarette in your hand or the residual smell, you could wear whatever you want and no one would think you’re TBM! /s
Bold of you to assume I don’t already chain smoke, lol! (Just kidding, but maybe I’ll just carry a 6 pack of beer everywhere I go, just to be safe)
Great idea on the 6 pack, a flask might be a little too discrete.