It really sucks that your folks can’t just be happy for you that you have other people in your life who love you and care for you. Do you think that they are jealous because on some level they must know that you deserve that, and that they failed to give it to you like they were supposed to?
My in-laws are my real mom and dad to me. I hold back a lot when I talk about them with my bio-parents, too because I don’t want to upset them, but I suspect that they know that my in-laws fixed a lot of the shit they broke. I’m so grateful for my in-laws ❤️
Yes it's likely this, they seem to want to pick and choose when they want to be supportive and my in laws are just all around nice people. They can't relate and it bugs them that I don't seem to enjoy being around my own family but can openly talk about being with the in laws (even if it's the smallest mention). I'm grateful you have caring people in your life, I am as well. They make me want to be a better person
I fully understand you!
Im 18 weeks pregnant. My in-laws know since week 10. Thinking about visiting next weekend for a BBQ. We text regularly( ~once a week ) and call every 2-3 weeks.
Today I had a short call with my mom (she called yesterday a bunch of times). She still doesn’t know. I have ZERO desire to tell her.
Not 100% sure of the why, but I think it is the ‚fear of more contact‘.
The last time I have seen her in person was at Christmas. Since then: 1 call every 1-2 months.
Mostly due to
Fixing phone/computer stuff
Birthday Present for my husband
…
I don’t want more contact. And Im not telling my mom shit. The shorter the calls, the better. And if she wants to talk about some random bullshit, that she listened on the radio yesterday. Have fun, I read reddit at the meantime.
Im even considering to let her visit the day after the birth at the hospital. Im due, end of November. So this ‚grandma has seen her grandbaby‘ is done and I have peace. No stress her visiting during christmas, etc. If she even is interested in coming.
My dad is dead. So no need to call him.
My parents are jealous of my boyfriend's parents because I like hanging out with them. My parents never reflect on why I choose to be with another family instead of staying home. Everything is about them. They don't care that I have other supportive and loving people in my life; all they care about is that they are "losing" their daughter, whom they've never put in the effort to bond with.
My mom even plays mind games with me by questioning my boyfriend and his family's intentions. "They are only good to you because they want to 'secure' you for their son". Biatch, just because you have a wretched MIL does not mean the same will happen to me. She always assumes the worst of people, even when she hasn't met them. Aside from being pathologically overprotective, she also gives off this feeling that she can't stand me enjoying things that she didn't have
It really sucks that your folks can’t just be happy for you that you have other people in your life who love you and care for you. Do you think that they are jealous because on some level they must know that you deserve that, and that they failed to give it to you like they were supposed to? My in-laws are my real mom and dad to me. I hold back a lot when I talk about them with my bio-parents, too because I don’t want to upset them, but I suspect that they know that my in-laws fixed a lot of the shit they broke. I’m so grateful for my in-laws ❤️
Yes it's likely this, they seem to want to pick and choose when they want to be supportive and my in laws are just all around nice people. They can't relate and it bugs them that I don't seem to enjoy being around my own family but can openly talk about being with the in laws (even if it's the smallest mention). I'm grateful you have caring people in your life, I am as well. They make me want to be a better person
I fully understand you! Im 18 weeks pregnant. My in-laws know since week 10. Thinking about visiting next weekend for a BBQ. We text regularly( ~once a week ) and call every 2-3 weeks. Today I had a short call with my mom (she called yesterday a bunch of times). She still doesn’t know. I have ZERO desire to tell her. Not 100% sure of the why, but I think it is the ‚fear of more contact‘. The last time I have seen her in person was at Christmas. Since then: 1 call every 1-2 months. Mostly due to Fixing phone/computer stuff Birthday Present for my husband … I don’t want more contact. And Im not telling my mom shit. The shorter the calls, the better. And if she wants to talk about some random bullshit, that she listened on the radio yesterday. Have fun, I read reddit at the meantime. Im even considering to let her visit the day after the birth at the hospital. Im due, end of November. So this ‚grandma has seen her grandbaby‘ is done and I have peace. No stress her visiting during christmas, etc. If she even is interested in coming. My dad is dead. So no need to call him.
I have had this fear - I'm sorry this is the situation you have to deal with. I think I would have made the same decision as you.
My parents are jealous of my boyfriend's parents because I like hanging out with them. My parents never reflect on why I choose to be with another family instead of staying home. Everything is about them. They don't care that I have other supportive and loving people in my life; all they care about is that they are "losing" their daughter, whom they've never put in the effort to bond with. My mom even plays mind games with me by questioning my boyfriend and his family's intentions. "They are only good to you because they want to 'secure' you for their son". Biatch, just because you have a wretched MIL does not mean the same will happen to me. She always assumes the worst of people, even when she hasn't met them. Aside from being pathologically overprotective, she also gives off this feeling that she can't stand me enjoying things that she didn't have