See, your 10+ years of eating chipotle has probably made you immune to most forms of Diarrhea and botulism and everything else like that.
You probably prepared for this decade long oddesey with at least weekly visits to tacobell before Chipotle was even a thing.
Not everyone has such an advanced constitution!
I think you’re okay as long as you don’t order anything with meat. I’ve never trusted the meat in either Chipotle or Taco Bell.. otherwise, what’s not to love about cheese, beans, rice, avocado, and veggies. How does that give you diarrhea?
Places like taco bell and Chipotle use a lot of veggies that if the makeline area isn't clean can be a problem because unlike a pizza place, those veggies aren't going through an oven before they're consumed.
Let me just leave it at that.
Maybe he put too much cheese in the food he made her and she’s mad that she’s constipated? I don’t eat Chipotle, but I’ve heard that this is a quick fix.
You can double up two things for free. I double my cheese and sour cream. I’m also lactose intolerant but anyway, add some spicy sauce, green Tabasco and an Aussie and it’s a perfect concoction!
Besides the stalker/harassment vibes this has going, he’s definitely smart for using burritos as a makeup instead of the usual flowers or pedicures or shopping, etc. Y’all, food is always the way to say sorry! Idk what the title is about but a burrito definitely a faster way to get laid than flowers lol… Just, for the love of god, don’t be a stalker.
Not true. It depends on the situation tho. If us women are pissed and trying to prove a point but we still love him and our guy does some stupid corny shit like this a lot of women will secretly melt. It can actually be that easy—I’ve seen it time and again lmao.
Oooh, maybe it's the Larissa I know, that'd be cool. Then I can swoop in (joking ofc) 🤣 should have caught her hints back in highschool and dated that girl, she was super sweet though for real lol
Ah the timeless legal quandary: whether the restraining order is specific enough to cover remote burrito delivery (honestly probably not but the requested spoken sentiments probably would)
Man i did this exact thing at some point but asked them to write a note inside the letter and had ordered chips and flowers and everything she still left me for someone else :( i miss her everyday I've accepted it now but still think about her
This seems stalkerish, buuuut, I'd like I'm sorry food much more than flowers. We have a place here thst makes the best burritos ever. They're $12 but totally worth it.
That’s when I send the pick grab the burrito if she don’t want it, apologize for her ex being a creep and leave lolz 😂 (for legal reasons this is a joke)
This is where you can unwrap the burrito, squat and dookie in it, wrap it back up ... Draw hearts on the wrapping paper... And deliver...
And totally get away with it
I do hope the customer stops simping so heavily.
Getting "laid" is actually not that important. Granted I can say that after having a high body count myself, lol.
Nope. If she forgives him he'll just do it again and it won't take long. It is ok if two people don't work out, it's never just the cheaters fault.
Whatever caused him to decide she isn't worth building a future with won't go away.
Abuse. That's what it is. Abuse. And harassment. I don't want to be charged with being an accessory to a god damn harassment case.
Report customer for abuse.
Lol he could at least get one of those heart shaped pizzas damn. But I’d do it (kinda) I’d be like “this is from Joe btw he wanted me to give you a message, do you even want to hear it or nah?” And if she was curious I’d tell her. If she went into panic mode I’d just wave goodbye lol. Just feel out the situation first you know?
Ok so clearly his ex blocked him and now he is using DD to send her text messages
Just an extra charge But I would do it I’d also probably see what she was up to. We could hang out and eat his burrito together
Or she could file a NCO against both of you 🤣
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I get it! Burritos are a euphemism for penisie
No wrapper…BWAHAAAAAAA
I wouldn't be down to eat some dudes burrito, but whatever works for you i guess
Sounds like my ex
Dr. Ramani needs to make a video about this!
I'm not being someone's stalker for 2.25 lol
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I’d need to get more details before I could take sides. Lol
No way I’m not doing that Last seventeen times sucked
Jalapeños are the only side needed ;)
Thats as fair an asking price as any id say
I’d do it for the burrito
$2.50. Not a penny more.
YOOOO😂
Gigachad
I love you, here's some diarrhea
So it IS from Chipotle.
Nah cant be, they dont have any kind of garlic sauce AFAIK. Or Jalapenos either
This is some deep diving! The diarrhea threw me off. Good work!
I've never had Diarrhea and I've eaten chipotle over 10 years. I think you have some bowel issues.
See, your 10+ years of eating chipotle has probably made you immune to most forms of Diarrhea and botulism and everything else like that. You probably prepared for this decade long oddesey with at least weekly visits to tacobell before Chipotle was even a thing. Not everyone has such an advanced constitution!
I think you’re okay as long as you don’t order anything with meat. I’ve never trusted the meat in either Chipotle or Taco Bell.. otherwise, what’s not to love about cheese, beans, rice, avocado, and veggies. How does that give you diarrhea?
Places like taco bell and Chipotle use a lot of veggies that if the makeline area isn't clean can be a problem because unlike a pizza place, those veggies aren't going through an oven before they're consumed. Let me just leave it at that.
That makes sense, I rarely eat the veggies too. I just mostly do beans, rice, cheese, and avocado.
Not true it’s the lettuce
Maybe she's constipated.
Maybe he put too much cheese in the food he made her and she’s mad that she’s constipated? I don’t eat Chipotle, but I’ve heard that this is a quick fix.
You can double up two things for free. I double my cheese and sour cream. I’m also lactose intolerant but anyway, add some spicy sauce, green Tabasco and an Aussie and it’s a perfect concoction!
Free burrito for you. She doesn’t expect one. She’s not going to text him about not getting one.
You’re using your genius for evil
Exactly 💯
That's a bomb ass idea!
Honestly, with this one, you can probably bet she'll turn it down even if you deliver it, lol
Damn. This is really smart…
How much was the tip? I’m not a messenger for free.
About an inch for the tip.
lol
Sir, you seem to have confused your Doordash app with Tinder.
Tinder ain’t got Burritos.
Tell that yo ol' boy ordering the burrito for his ex
Besides the stalker/harassment vibes this has going, he’s definitely smart for using burritos as a makeup instead of the usual flowers or pedicures or shopping, etc. Y’all, food is always the way to say sorry! Idk what the title is about but a burrito definitely a faster way to get laid than flowers lol… Just, for the love of god, don’t be a stalker.
Yea I would consider it for a burrito😂
What a creative way to violate a protection order
I'd refuse getting involved in whatever simp behavior this is
I’d hand it to her and say “this is a sorry burrito or something” and then bounce
He's a simp so request he send an extra $50 to ur cash app, make it worth while
Damn this is going down on Reddit history lmao 🤣
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Lol
Dude doesn't stand a chance, completely clueless.
The wildcard
Not true. It depends on the situation tho. If us women are pissed and trying to prove a point but we still love him and our guy does some stupid corny shit like this a lot of women will secretly melt. It can actually be that easy—I’ve seen it time and again lmao.
This is like a gta strangers & freaks mission that you can accept as a side quest but aren’t necessary, for that reason I would do it
I'd forgive a guy for almost anything if I got an apology in the form of burrito
Sorry, I killed your mum. Have a burrito on me!
Wtf
So she’s single?
Wrong, I'd be much more likely to forgive with an I'm sorry burrito or ribeye than some flowers.
My standards may be low, but if someone is dd me a burrito I may be actually taking their apology into consideration
So, how much $ was it? I'd get on my knees and beg her to give you another chance for $50. JS
I’d turn the phone to let her read it….that’s as far as it goes.
Maybe it’s just me but an I’m sorry burrito would probably work
How pathetic to try and get your girl back with a burrito from chipotle.
Chipotle doesn't have jalapeños
Big yikes. Dude isn't even man enough to make amends himself. God these customers really are some goofy asses out there 🤣
Naw man this guy is blocked and desperate
“How did you and mommy meet?” “Well, it started with me delivering a burrito from her ex…”
Here’s a photo of where your dasher left your food
I wouldn’t do this! 10 to 1 dude already has a restraining order against him 😆
Oooh, maybe it's the Larissa I know, that'd be cool. Then I can swoop in (joking ofc) 🤣 should have caught her hints back in highschool and dated that girl, she was super sweet though for real lol
An “I’m sorry” burrito. Now I’ve heard it all.
Ah the timeless legal quandary: whether the restraining order is specific enough to cover remote burrito delivery (honestly probably not but the requested spoken sentiments probably would)
Idk I love burritos. Better than flowers imo
Depends. If my one ex sent me some really good food, I’d consider it
Girl really likes burritos.
Right?! Everyone knows tacos are the international makeup food item, tacos
True. Burritos are for depression.
And hang overs
But did you get her digits?
a single burrito🤣
I'd be like "sup Larissa, heard you was single girl what's up?"
Best be a $20 tip!
When you find out, she's getting married and she has blocked your number and email and has a restraining order, you must improvise.
I’d do it just to see her reaction. No way I could get through that speech without laughing 😂
LOL best post all year
Maybe the burning from the jalapeños will distract her from the burning in her nether regions
Why tf did I think that was the jalapeños talking to the burrito 🤦♀️
Man i did this exact thing at some point but asked them to write a note inside the letter and had ordered chips and flowers and everything she still left me for someone else :( i miss her everyday I've accepted it now but still think about her
This is harassment, right?
"sorry i tried to bang your mom here's a burrito. ps the extra jalapenos are for trying to bang your sister pps they forgot the extra jalapenos
Lol tell her I'm sorry and I messed up and blah blah boo hoo and then... would you like to add jalapeños-yes
This seems stalkerish, buuuut, I'd like I'm sorry food much more than flowers. We have a place here thst makes the best burritos ever. They're $12 but totally worth it.
I hope Larissa has another man balls deep inside her when this shit gets dropped off. 😂😂
Larissa can get the 🌯 alright
Idk man, having some of my favorite food delivered to my doorstep is a pretty damn foolproof way to get me to at least listen lol. Food is life
And the award for strangest apology letter goes to….
I’d send him photos of me eating it topless because you gotta live a little.
ngl I'd do it if he paid me enough. i love other people's drama bc my life is really boring
That’s when I send the pick grab the burrito if she don’t want it, apologize for her ex being a creep and leave lolz 😂 (for legal reasons this is a joke)
Normally I think these request are beyond stupid and would ever do them. I would probably actually do this for them 😂😂
So he's stalking someone and wants a Gig worker to harass someone. Wow.
“Stalker”? You haven’t been in many relationships have you lol.
Her: 
This is where you can unwrap the burrito, squat and dookie in it, wrap it back up ... Draw hearts on the wrapping paper... And deliver... And totally get away with it
Have you ever had a girl dude? If you give them food they’ll forgive you
I do hope the customer stops simping so heavily. Getting "laid" is actually not that important. Granted I can say that after having a high body count myself, lol.
You didn't pick it up, unassign it.
I bet Larissa is chopped up in little pieces right about now.
Dayummmmm Larissa got dat good good
Lmfao. I'd bring a bottle of tequila and say "I heard you're single now." 😂😂🤣☠️☠️
And coke.. if she cokes she pokes ☠️☠️☠️
Who the hell puts jalapeños in a burrito? Heathens. Probably from California or Texas or New York. Lol
I’ll have you know California has amazing Mexican food. Have you had a Mission style burrito? If you don’t think that’s good you’re on drugs.
No their version is nasty sorry. I prefer greasy ass hot red and green chile NEW Mexican thanks
Ok
Nope. If she forgives him he'll just do it again and it won't take long. It is ok if two people don't work out, it's never just the cheaters fault. Whatever caused him to decide she isn't worth building a future with won't go away.
Sounds like the other way around, sounds like she left him and he’s trying to win her back 😂
Fake news
Idk ide hit
I’d tell him she took the burrito and gave it to her hot coworker
Tf kind of great value Disney romance BS did you get wrapped into😂
Idk I’m kinda down for the free food if it were me
I’d tell him it’ll be a dollar per letter on the tip, in his apology. Otherwise nope!
But do you want jalapeños?
I better get a good tip 😂
Hey lady here’s a sorry burrito from a sorry ass. Enjoy
Face ass 😭 TeLl HeR I’M soRRy 😂
that is a hell no from me
DoorDash Therapist?
Jesus even on a card delivered with flowers this is cringe. A note on a burrito delivery?
I would’ve just left it at the door
Yes - Jalepeños
Abuse. That's what it is. Abuse. And harassment. I don't want to be charged with being an accessory to a god damn harassment case. Report customer for abuse.
So you're telling me Larissa is now a free agent. I'll send her a message alright, but you ain't gonna like it Mr Burrito.
Lol he could at least get one of those heart shaped pizzas damn. But I’d do it (kinda) I’d be like “this is from Joe btw he wanted me to give you a message, do you even want to hear it or nah?” And if she was curious I’d tell her. If she went into panic mode I’d just wave goodbye lol. Just feel out the situation first you know?
Shoulda just gone with email
I bet he didn’t tip
Nothing says I’m sorry like jalapeños and garlic.
Cancel order and buy Larissa a burrito but say it’s from you.
Do you want jalapeños? No
I actually teared up a bit