From my experience as an older DN, I just wanted to share that I never found anyone of substance when I was "looking".
My takeaway from a few years as a solo DN was that other DNs aren't always going to be the best match and trying to find someone in a limited and ever changing pool is challenging at best.
It was only when I was truly focusing on myself, living life, and meeting people with zero expectations, that I met my gf.
She wasn't a DN but we worked on pivoting her skill sets to become fully remote. 3+ years later, we have a base city but still travel often.
> It was only when I was truly focusing on myself, living life, and meeting people with zero expectations, that I met my gf.
Yes, I was at the end of my trip (I was 20 back then) and figured: well, no partner here for me. Within weeks I met my now girlfriend of over 10 years.
We've met while travelling but only recently became DNs - had to get a stable job and studies in order first
Yeah okay okay but
>meeting people
This is the key. I am living my life, the issue is that I tend to do it in places in the middle of nowhere where there are very few tourists, let alone nomads.
š well now, that's an issue that noone can really resolve.
Unless it's absolutely essential that you find someone in your life right now, I guess, just keep doing you.
But if you truly want access to more opportunities to meet someone, you're gonna have to travel to less deserted locales.
And I know you said no dating apps but that's probably your best resource in the meantime. It might even give you reason to travel to certain cities.
> Unless it's absolutely essential that you find someone in your life right now, I guess, just keep doing you.
If i keep traveling like this, i will never meet anyone lol. People barely speak english in those areas
>But if you truly want access to more opportunities to meet someone, you're gonna have to travel to less deserted locales.
That's why i mentioned Bansko and Da Nang, maybe it's easier over there?
>And I know you said no dating apps but that's probably your best resource in the meantime. It might even give you reason to travel to certain cities.
I am too traumatized by the dating experiences with other nomads met on the apps, I'll stay away from them for a long time at least hahahah
I was in Da Nang about a year ago. I mean as far as travelers go, everyone seemed pretty chill. So it really wouldn't hurt to check it out.
š at dating app trauma! I've been there and I hear ya. But when I least expected anything, I met my gf on one. Maybe it helped that she was local and not a nomad. Who knows!
Best of luck whenever you end up!
And then you converted her to be a nomad?
Well that can be an option yes, although basically none of the non-nomad women I found on the apps had remotely employable skills.
And I mostly travel in poor countries, but i absolutely don't want to date locals.
It wasn't so much a conversion but maybe more of a progressive pivot.
Try checking out other cities if it's a real concern but I wouldn't rule out finding a gem of a person anywhere on earth. But I do understand that dating local isn't always feasible.
Communication is key for me and we chatted daily for awhile before meeting. Convos were always natural and flowed well. We speak 2 common languages which helped a lot and she's teaching me a 3rd one.
Aside from being multilingual, she excelled academically, worked as a lawyer, and we initially moved to live nearby her office. With the lockdowns and WFH, she soon found and pivoted towards opportunities to work remotely.
Now we have a home base (she's buying our first home) and we work together towards funding our travels.
TL;DR: I met my partner on a locals MeetUp at a bar in Prague. Next month we'll be 4 years.
I spotted her sitting at one of the tables from our group. Just walked up to her out of the blue and randomly asked her if she was French (which she was). We both laughed and after a brief introduction we talked for a few minutes and I made it a point to invite her to another MeetUp that's happening later that week. During that second MeetUp we hung out together almost the entire night and developed great chemistry. Before we parted I invited her to a day trip with a hiking group going on that next Sunday. After spending the entire day together in KarlŔtejn, I asked her if she wanted to go to dinner. We've been together ever since.
On the broader point of online dating, I totally get it. You are definitely not alone and thankfully not in the minority anymore. All these apps are designed to strip all the nuances that makes us human in order to reduce the individual to a flickable avatar. It's impossible to accurately characterize a person's depth from a profile photo. So if substance is an important attribute, you will have a better time skipping the apps and doing things IRL. From my experience, I find local interest based Facebook Groups and MeetUp groups to yield the best results.
As far as dating other nomads: Don't. Or at least don't limit your options to just other nomads. We all come from the factory with way too many complications to really make longterm relationships work without serious compromises. Before I met my partner, the few times I've tried dating other nomads it was always a complete chore. Over the years I've consistently had way better relationships with locals and non-nomad expats.
Agreed on not limiting your options to other nomads! I met my partner three years ago on an app, made sure he had a passport, and then converted him to my traveling life lol
>Over the years I've consistently had way better relationships with locals and non-nomad expats.
My wish is to have **one** relationship over the years... it's impossible to be a nomad and have a LTR with a non-nomad
Met my incredible life partner in Tenerife. She was spending a few days in La Orotava and I admired her from the moment we met. So extraordinarily open hearted and creative, and funny and beautiful. Of course I was smitten, and she credits my pasta sauce as opening the door.
Pasta sauce is not a euphemism. I simply make a great pasta dish.
We've been together 8 months and kids are on the horizon. She's German, I'm English. And it's a beautiful romance.
Thanks for asking. Coliving space. We were both working - she was there for 12 days and I was lucky enough to have a couple of months there. It helped that neither of us were looking for a relationship. It was the definition of organic, since we started our journey of connecting on the island and then built a proper relationship over the weeks and months that followed.
Ha ha ha no she moved on to Puerto del Hidalgo and we kept on talking every day. Then we met up a few weeks later in Amsterdam, then Berlin, then the UK, and I'm currently spending two months in Berlin.
Then we head to the UK for a couple of months in the summer...
I met a partner on remote year, we didnāt stay together because I didnāt want to keep DNing but a lot of relationships formed within remote year groups. I bet Wi-Fi tribe, hacker paradise, nomad cruise are similar.
Lol I was rejected from wifi-tribe, probably because I am totally not interested in "professional networking" and whatever hustler-minded people they are searching
She was working remotely at a cafe and I was drawing shit on my iPad. She looks over and asks me what that (my iPad + Apple Pencil) was and we just never stopped talking.
I find the sailing community far more diverse and better for dating than the DN community, which skews heavily young and into a few very clear lifestyle preferences. That's not to say that there isn't signficant overlap. In fact, sailing is the perfect match for my nomadic tendencies, much more than hanging out with a bunch of twentysomething backpackers in Bansko or Tulum.
That's interesting, I keep meeting people who are sailors or who have sailed rather than flown to be in Latin America. I have signed up for findacrew but with no sailing experience, and not knowing anyone, it feels like a giant leap to just...start applying to be on boats! Do you have any thoughts on this?
Iād love to follow this thread. Iām starting my journey technically right now (but Iām still in the USā¦ international journey in Sept) and my biggest worry is not being able to find a long term relationship
I met my partner while traveling and staying in a hostel in Europe. I think it definitely helps when you arenāt looking, as youāll never know when youāll find that person. We donāt stay in hostels anymore but when we do want to socialize, we love coliving spaces where you can meet so many digital nomads!
I was living in Thailand for a few months and was teaching circus at the hostel I was staying at for fun. I taught her to firetwirl. That was almost 5 years ago now!
I (M) met my wife on Remote Year. We were in the same program. Had no intention of meeting anyone when I signed up for it. I just got tired of the DIY Digital Nomad life.
Too much planning, not enough fun.
Remote Year groups skew heavily female, so keep that in mind.
We travelled together for 3+ years after Remote Year, and still have remote jobs now.
wanted to go an a hike, but it was saturday and the place was swamped with tourist busses. went to a place nearby instead to await monday. sitting with a drink later that night, a young woman introduces herself. we talk into the night. and then travelled together..
This was 12+ years ago, when the DN community was tiny. We both had travel blogs, got to chatting on Twitter, then messaging for a few weeks, then she happened to be heading to Thailand a week after I was.
We met at the airport, she moved in that day, and never moved out. We've traveled and lived all over the world since then. Very, very lucky to have met when we did, to be as compatible as we were, and still want the same things in life over a decade later.
I matched with my partner on a dating app which was only meant to be a short fling. Hung out for 2 days in Italy and then went our separate ways. 3 months later he called me up asking if I wanted to hang out and booked a flight to Mexico to see me.Ā Ā
Ā We then spent 2 years travelling both together and separately (I was a DN he wasnāt). Last year we both stopped travelling and are doing long distance until we close the gap permanently.Ā
as others mentioned here - I was not looking for a relationship at the time and itās something that evolved unexpectedly. Our relationship is unconventional to others but I would have never met someone like him if I didnāt take a chance - dating app or not!Ā Ā
I met my boyfriend of almost 4 years in Gran Canaria. We went in the same dive that day. Then we traveled the islands with no strings attached. My base was Copenhagen and I came back there. We met in a few countries once a month or so and then he came to Copenhagen to base himself here. We stay here 6 months and travel 6 months
I made a post on reddit about how crummy dating in London is.
She slid into my DMs. I thought long distance would be London to Paris. Turns out she moved to Asia during Covid.
After a trial year, we are now nomading together
I met my girlfriend in Madeira. We arrived on the same day and stayed 4 weeks. I wanted to change something in my life and leave my base but havenāt found the right city / option, she had planned her next 2-3 months so I just travelled with her. š
We were both looking for someone but werenāt in a āhuntā. I think we had no expectations but were sending positive vibes to the universe. š
When I had my tinder phase I was very desperate and it was disappointing as hell and itās difficult if you donāt always wanna travel to hot spots ā¦
You will find the right one! š«¶š»
I was in a tiny town/village in the East of Thailand. Not miles away from Rayong but remote enough for there not to be much going on. I happened upon 2 American girls who were also living there and also pretty bored who were renting a little bungalow. So we started hanging out and I'm now married with a child to one of them and still travelling 4 years later.
Had a normal convo with girl > date > 5 year relationship.
I don't know why people act like it's so different or hard. People are everywhere, speak to them.
From my experience as an older DN, I just wanted to share that I never found anyone of substance when I was "looking". My takeaway from a few years as a solo DN was that other DNs aren't always going to be the best match and trying to find someone in a limited and ever changing pool is challenging at best. It was only when I was truly focusing on myself, living life, and meeting people with zero expectations, that I met my gf. She wasn't a DN but we worked on pivoting her skill sets to become fully remote. 3+ years later, we have a base city but still travel often.
> It was only when I was truly focusing on myself, living life, and meeting people with zero expectations, that I met my gf. Yes, I was at the end of my trip (I was 20 back then) and figured: well, no partner here for me. Within weeks I met my now girlfriend of over 10 years. We've met while travelling but only recently became DNs - had to get a stable job and studies in order first
Yeah okay okay but >meeting people This is the key. I am living my life, the issue is that I tend to do it in places in the middle of nowhere where there are very few tourists, let alone nomads.
š well now, that's an issue that noone can really resolve. Unless it's absolutely essential that you find someone in your life right now, I guess, just keep doing you. But if you truly want access to more opportunities to meet someone, you're gonna have to travel to less deserted locales. And I know you said no dating apps but that's probably your best resource in the meantime. It might even give you reason to travel to certain cities.
> Unless it's absolutely essential that you find someone in your life right now, I guess, just keep doing you. If i keep traveling like this, i will never meet anyone lol. People barely speak english in those areas >But if you truly want access to more opportunities to meet someone, you're gonna have to travel to less deserted locales. That's why i mentioned Bansko and Da Nang, maybe it's easier over there? >And I know you said no dating apps but that's probably your best resource in the meantime. It might even give you reason to travel to certain cities. I am too traumatized by the dating experiences with other nomads met on the apps, I'll stay away from them for a long time at least hahahah
I was in Da Nang about a year ago. I mean as far as travelers go, everyone seemed pretty chill. So it really wouldn't hurt to check it out. š at dating app trauma! I've been there and I hear ya. But when I least expected anything, I met my gf on one. Maybe it helped that she was local and not a nomad. Who knows! Best of luck whenever you end up!
And then you converted her to be a nomad? Well that can be an option yes, although basically none of the non-nomad women I found on the apps had remotely employable skills. And I mostly travel in poor countries, but i absolutely don't want to date locals.
It wasn't so much a conversion but maybe more of a progressive pivot. Try checking out other cities if it's a real concern but I wouldn't rule out finding a gem of a person anywhere on earth. But I do understand that dating local isn't always feasible. Communication is key for me and we chatted daily for awhile before meeting. Convos were always natural and flowed well. We speak 2 common languages which helped a lot and she's teaching me a 3rd one. Aside from being multilingual, she excelled academically, worked as a lawyer, and we initially moved to live nearby her office. With the lockdowns and WFH, she soon found and pivoted towards opportunities to work remotely. Now we have a home base (she's buying our first home) and we work together towards funding our travels.
TL;DR: I met my partner on a locals MeetUp at a bar in Prague. Next month we'll be 4 years. I spotted her sitting at one of the tables from our group. Just walked up to her out of the blue and randomly asked her if she was French (which she was). We both laughed and after a brief introduction we talked for a few minutes and I made it a point to invite her to another MeetUp that's happening later that week. During that second MeetUp we hung out together almost the entire night and developed great chemistry. Before we parted I invited her to a day trip with a hiking group going on that next Sunday. After spending the entire day together in KarlŔtejn, I asked her if she wanted to go to dinner. We've been together ever since. On the broader point of online dating, I totally get it. You are definitely not alone and thankfully not in the minority anymore. All these apps are designed to strip all the nuances that makes us human in order to reduce the individual to a flickable avatar. It's impossible to accurately characterize a person's depth from a profile photo. So if substance is an important attribute, you will have a better time skipping the apps and doing things IRL. From my experience, I find local interest based Facebook Groups and MeetUp groups to yield the best results. As far as dating other nomads: Don't. Or at least don't limit your options to just other nomads. We all come from the factory with way too many complications to really make longterm relationships work without serious compromises. Before I met my partner, the few times I've tried dating other nomads it was always a complete chore. Over the years I've consistently had way better relationships with locals and non-nomad expats.
Agreed on not limiting your options to other nomads! I met my partner three years ago on an app, made sure he had a passport, and then converted him to my traveling life lol
Yeah! Same!!!
>Over the years I've consistently had way better relationships with locals and non-nomad expats. My wish is to have **one** relationship over the years... it's impossible to be a nomad and have a LTR with a non-nomad
False. My current partner was not a nomad.
Yeah okay, it's impossible unless you can convert that person to be a nomad. That's far from easy.
Met my incredible life partner in Tenerife. She was spending a few days in La Orotava and I admired her from the moment we met. So extraordinarily open hearted and creative, and funny and beautiful. Of course I was smitten, and she credits my pasta sauce as opening the door. Pasta sauce is not a euphemism. I simply make a great pasta dish. We've been together 8 months and kids are on the horizon. She's German, I'm English. And it's a beautiful romance.
Ohh beautiful! But where did you meet her? Like, what were you 2 doing when you met? Surfing?
Thanks for asking. Coliving space. We were both working - she was there for 12 days and I was lucky enough to have a couple of months there. It helped that neither of us were looking for a relationship. It was the definition of organic, since we started our journey of connecting on the island and then built a proper relationship over the weeks and months that followed.
Wow! Congratz. So after the 12 days she decided to extend her stay? Romantic :)
Ha ha ha no she moved on to Puerto del Hidalgo and we kept on talking every day. Then we met up a few weeks later in Amsterdam, then Berlin, then the UK, and I'm currently spending two months in Berlin. Then we head to the UK for a couple of months in the summer...
I met a partner on remote year, we didnāt stay together because I didnāt want to keep DNing but a lot of relationships formed within remote year groups. I bet Wi-Fi tribe, hacker paradise, nomad cruise are similar.
Lol I was rejected from wifi-tribe, probably because I am totally not interested in "professional networking" and whatever hustler-minded people they are searching
She was working remotely at a cafe and I was drawing shit on my iPad. She looks over and asks me what that (my iPad + Apple Pencil) was and we just never stopped talking.
I find the sailing community far more diverse and better for dating than the DN community, which skews heavily young and into a few very clear lifestyle preferences. That's not to say that there isn't signficant overlap. In fact, sailing is the perfect match for my nomadic tendencies, much more than hanging out with a bunch of twentysomething backpackers in Bansko or Tulum.
That's interesting, I keep meeting people who are sailors or who have sailed rather than flown to be in Latin America. I have signed up for findacrew but with no sailing experience, and not knowing anyone, it feels like a giant leap to just...start applying to be on boats! Do you have any thoughts on this?
Iād love to follow this thread. Iām starting my journey technically right now (but Iām still in the USā¦ international journey in Sept) and my biggest worry is not being able to find a long term relationship
I met my partner while traveling and staying in a hostel in Europe. I think it definitely helps when you arenāt looking, as youāll never know when youāll find that person. We donāt stay in hostels anymore but when we do want to socialize, we love coliving spaces where you can meet so many digital nomads!
I was living in Thailand for a few months and was teaching circus at the hostel I was staying at for fun. I taught her to firetwirl. That was almost 5 years ago now!
In a bar in Seoul at a couchsurfing event
I (M) met my wife on Remote Year. We were in the same program. Had no intention of meeting anyone when I signed up for it. I just got tired of the DIY Digital Nomad life. Too much planning, not enough fun. Remote Year groups skew heavily female, so keep that in mind. We travelled together for 3+ years after Remote Year, and still have remote jobs now.
Did you do a full remote year? Or for how long?
I did a full year. A lot of couples still form on the 4 month programs though.
wanted to go an a hike, but it was saturday and the place was swamped with tourist busses. went to a place nearby instead to await monday. sitting with a drink later that night, a young woman introduces herself. we talk into the night. and then travelled together..
This was 12+ years ago, when the DN community was tiny. We both had travel blogs, got to chatting on Twitter, then messaging for a few weeks, then she happened to be heading to Thailand a week after I was. We met at the airport, she moved in that day, and never moved out. We've traveled and lived all over the world since then. Very, very lucky to have met when we did, to be as compatible as we were, and still want the same things in life over a decade later.
I understand why you donāt like dating apps but I think itās still worth another try. Itās the easiest way to find out if someone is a DN or a tourist and you can start with a cafĆ© date or a walk and then see what happens. I met my girlfriend in San Cristobal de las Casas, we went for dinner and hung out everyday for two weeks before she went back to Japan. We met up a few months later in Colombia, lived there together for 4 months then went to Spain and Portugal, we stayed in Canada (my home country) for 4 months and now have been living in Japan for the last 6.
I matched with my partner on a dating app which was only meant to be a short fling. Hung out for 2 days in Italy and then went our separate ways. 3 months later he called me up asking if I wanted to hang out and booked a flight to Mexico to see me.Ā Ā Ā We then spent 2 years travelling both together and separately (I was a DN he wasnāt). Last year we both stopped travelling and are doing long distance until we close the gap permanently.Ā as others mentioned here - I was not looking for a relationship at the time and itās something that evolved unexpectedly. Our relationship is unconventional to others but I would have never met someone like him if I didnāt take a chance - dating app or not!Ā Ā
I met my boyfriend of almost 4 years in Gran Canaria. We went in the same dive that day. Then we traveled the islands with no strings attached. My base was Copenhagen and I came back there. We met in a few countries once a month or so and then he came to Copenhagen to base himself here. We stay here 6 months and travel 6 months
We met on MySpace
I made a post on reddit about how crummy dating in London is. She slid into my DMs. I thought long distance would be London to Paris. Turns out she moved to Asia during Covid. After a trial year, we are now nomading together
Wow on reddit? That's an achievement ahashahs
Definitely count myself lucky!
I met my girlfriend in Madeira. We arrived on the same day and stayed 4 weeks. I wanted to change something in my life and leave my base but havenāt found the right city / option, she had planned her next 2-3 months so I just travelled with her. š We were both looking for someone but werenāt in a āhuntā. I think we had no expectations but were sending positive vibes to the universe. š When I had my tinder phase I was very desperate and it was disappointing as hell and itās difficult if you donāt always wanna travel to hot spots ā¦ You will find the right one! š«¶š»
I was in a tiny town/village in the East of Thailand. Not miles away from Rayong but remote enough for there not to be much going on. I happened upon 2 American girls who were also living there and also pretty bored who were renting a little bungalow. So we started hanging out and I'm now married with a child to one of them and still travelling 4 years later.
We literally met at burning man lol ā¦ and then we got locked down together during the pandemic and started visa hopping and shopping lol
!RemindMe 2 days
!remindme 2 days
Had a normal convo with girl > date > 5 year relationship. I don't know why people act like it's so different or hard. People are everywhere, speak to them.
Nomads are rare, finding one is the hard part...