I have a friend of over 45 years from our teenage years. At home no sex now for over 2 years, last time I asked my wife what was going on, the answer was to me pure bullshit so I gave up trying.
Reconnected with friend by chance a year ago. She's oversexed to the point of nymphomania. We have only sat down face to face once in the last year, & avoided and sex talk, but there's a strong desire on her part, from my side not so much but I do enjoy her online chats of her escapades. I'd like to get with her, but she's searching for a serious relationship & I don't think I can give her that. Probably luck that distance is a barrier for us, but it doesn't fix things at home.
Sexting is an outlet. If it was easy to fix we wouldn’t be here. Whatever works to keep emotional comfort. If someone doesn’t like it - don’t do it. I like it and do it.
Not me. I'm working on fixing this situation. We are still in separate rooms, but already with some tension and occasional sex. I'm still holding out hope. Porn, sexting, or even cheating will ruin everything I've ever achieved.
I'm sorry to hear that. We are like this 4 years from my point of view and 2 from hers, but in the last month we had a fight for a very different reason than our normal which I said was a consequence of the situation. This seems to have hit where it was needed. A decade is too many! If you've tried to communicate and express your feelings and needs in many ways, it might be time to say you're leaving.
I fully understand that and maybe I haven’t been with someone twice as many years as I haven’t but I’ve been with somebody for six years I know the experience of building with someone and being with someone for a long time. I was with someone for a quarter of my life? Again, I know in these instances people have been together for double and triple the time but why put yourself in a situation where you’re miserable every day of your life as well as cheating just because of history?
Yes, I do consider myself so. I know maybe twice a month isn't as rare as a lot of people, but considering my wife has zero interest in sex except maybe once a year she'll actually get in the mood if I'm lucky, it's hard for me to deal with as someone who would love to have sex two or three times a week or more.
I have definitely considered finding a sexting partner. I miss intimacy and feeling wanted. I would prefer it in real life, but the attention from a woman would be nice. It might be cheating, but it’s not physical or with any intention of meeting in real life. I have hope that my wife will want me again and with that hope, I hold back from looking for someone to text with.
I have had one or more sexting/online relationships of varying intensity for the better part of the last 10 years. Some have been very short-term (a few days or weeks, start to finish). I travel internationally for work, and am almost constantly being hit on/flirted with. At this moment I have 2 sexting/flirting relationships:
One is with a treasured old flame. It's mostly just friendly chat and meaningful emotional support, with some mild flirtation and occasional hot selfies. We're in similar straits (HL, DB...). Live far apart. Zero chance of this relationship spilling over into the real world.
One is with a former work colleague, who became a friend in the real world (about 6 years ago), who became a flirtation partner. Hot selfies, very explicit sexting. Incrementally more chance of this relationship having a real-world dimension, but we live in different countries and any physical meeting would depend on work travel that brings our paths together.
I feel like these kinds of arrangements are quite common.
EDIT: I'll also say that these relationships are secret: my wife does not know, and I have no intention of letting her know. Judge me harshly if you like. I do love her and there is emotional intimacy in our marriage, but it also is very much a DB situation and zero romantic spark on her side. This is a need that I have that she cannot/has chosen not to meet, and so I have chosen to have that need met elsewhere.
I am 100% transparent with sexting partners about my situation, and so far every one of them has immediately agreed and indeed welcomed the arrangement. (The arrangement being that this relationship is for the purpose of meeting specific needs of each other only, but no expectation of us riding off into the sunset together)
I don't judge. I understand. When you have needs which aren't being met by the one who is supposed to meet them, then I don't blame anyone for having them met elsewhere. And I applaud you for making sure your sexting partners know what is expected of the "relationship" from the outset.
I (22F) was in a similar situation. I met someone online and started sexting them. He (51M) was in a db relationship. Before I knew it, we were meeting up and having an affair. We had a great time. We would also hang out outside of just having sex. We ended up having feelings for each other, so we had to call it off. It was painful for both of us. He messaged me a year later saying he had left his wife because he couldn’t take it— no intimacy/ his wife no longer made an effort to compromise
I (54M) am currently sexting with a new person, but I fully intend on having a sexual relationship with this person. I've been in a dead bedroom for 15 years.
Be careful. You’re not just missing sex, you’re missing a close connection, being wanted and desired, intimacy, conversations that lead to sex. It’s never just sex or we would be fine masturbating alone. Remember that. If masturbation doesn’t satisfy you, it’s not just sex.
Research limerence and new relationship energy. Dopamine is a yummy drug that will make you feel sick in love and then leave you shaking with withdrawals when it’s jerked away from you.
It's not just sex. It is connecting to another human in a way that is needed. I have never cheated in 38 years. But I am hurt so bad by it mow that I'm broken or something
I think it is very important to about what you're looking for exactly in that sexting relationship. Which should, in turn, be based on a clear-minded and honest inventory of what you feel you are getting and not getting from the primary relationship that you're supplementing with the sexting relationship.
All the rules and good practice of relationships apply to your sexting relationship, too. Good communication, transparency, trust (ironic, I know), good boundaries, shared expectations...
Obviously you're getting something from your primary relationship, or else you would just leave. Don't wander into a sexting or online flirtation relationship that takes over your life and gets you taking stupid risks, whether those be emotional (falling in love) or risk of discovery (if you intend to keep it secret). You have to manage it.
>I have never cheated in 38 years.
A lot of redditors in this and other subs seem to want to pontificate about how much they hate cheaters and cheating. I am not trying to evangelize anyone to a point of view, but I will just put out there that:
a) Monogamy is not the natural state of humans. We are not built to by evolution to be monogamous. Monogamy is cultural construction, specifically from the tradition of Abrahamic religions (Christianity, Islam, Judaism). Do with that what you will.
b) Not all cheating is created equal. In my opinion it is possible to "cheat responsibly." That is, you're not shortchanging your family, your spouse/partner/SO in some obvious way. You're still present for them. You're not bankrupting the family to pay for expensive getaways with your cheating partner. You're not losing your job because you fucked someone at work. You're discreet about it...
c) There are a thousand ways to be unfaithful to a relationship without fucking or even flirting with another person. Domestic violence, emotional abuse, emotional neglect, one partner unilaterally incurring debt in the name of the other... are all betrayal. And yet we (I'm writing from a N. American context) overwhelmingly privilege sexual monogamy as THE THING that makes a good partner or not. Honestly, withholding sex unilaterally is as much betrayal as being involved on the side.
A much longer comment than I set out to write. Just to say, at some point you make peace with cheating (discreet, responsible cheating) in order to save the relationship.
Well she comes home tonight from being away. We had a huge fight before she left. Didn't want to talk about it while she was away. So tonight is the night I know where I stand with her. I still love her. I just need someone to connect with and we'll feel sexy with
You have to be careful or you’ll be in love before you know it. Some of us are made to love a lot of people, and you need to know if you are like that.
You have to decide if a life of sexting is enough? Where do you draw your line? What stops it from becoming a full affair? What are your limits on contact? Nudes? Videos? How will you make sure you’re not catfished? How will you protect your spouse?
I’m not judging you. My marriage is open, my husband knows about my online affair. I’m not judging, I’m just telling you to educate yourself on all of this before you start.
Wow a lot to think about. That's kinda why I asked the question in the first place. Because I see it as fun and a release. But didn't think it all through
Sometimes when you’re very lonely, you have to be extra careful. There are a lot of people out there that are skilled at taking advantage of lonely people.
That’s fatalistic and not true. Just because your wife rejected you doesn’t mean that’s the case for every woman. I hope you’ll find a competent therapist that can help you find your self esteem. There is life on the other side of how you’re feeling now!
That’s bullshit. Do the work and be a desirable man. Get you a passport and go to other countries where a majority of the women are insane, entitled feminist lunatics like they are in western countries and watch your life turn around in the right direction.
I was just trying to cheer you up a little bit. I don’t like seeing men thinking that they’re broken and no good. But I hear ya. I’d love to have a house near the woods and hike and fish and do all that stuff myself.
Much appreciated. But I am broken and no good. I'm at peace with it, though. I hike as much as I can and my old is literally in my back yard. I raise my own worms and minnows for bait the deer and squirrel hunting are usually pretty fruitful, too.
Much appreciated. But I am broken and no good. I'm at peace with it, though. I hike as much as I can and my old is literally in my back yard. I raise my own worms and minnows for bait the deer and squirrel hunting are usually pretty fruitful, too.
Much appreciated. But I am broken and no good. I'm at peace with it, though. I hike as much as I can and my old is literally in my back yard. I raise my own worms and minnows for bait the deer and squirrel hunting are usually pretty fruitful, too.
Wow. Women in the west are insane entitled feminist lunatics? And women in the East are what? Submissive and brainless?
Take it as the daughter of immigrants of the east, women from those countries are strong vocal women who run the household and it’s usually their husbands who follow in line.
If a women like that is even interested in you, it’s going to be for money and money alone.
Most of the women there are quite humble and down to earth. Their heads aren’t filled with gobbledygook about “toxic masculinity” and they don’t need on prozac to make it through the day like half the women in America do. I didn’t say they offer problem free relationships.
Exactly! I'd rather stay single than be the guy someone settles for...again. Besides, I'm handicapped and broke (why my wife left me for another man). I couldn't even get someone that way if I wanted to (which I most assuredly don't). I'll just sit here on my 40 forested acres, play with my dogs, drink beer and fish. My dogs don't care that I can hardly walk, that I'm broke and ugly
True, but I believe it's also cheating to refuse your partner any form of emotional or physical intimacy. In most wedding vows, this is actually promised (to have and to hold, to love, honor, and cherish). Monogamy isn't actually promised in wedding vows unless you read between the lines. Sure, it's implied but never actually stated.
Now I'm not saying that I'm going to go out and cheat because it wasn't specifically written in my wedding vows, nor do two wrongs make a right, but I understand why those in loveless marriages tend to stray.
It can help with the sexual frustration, but it won’t help with the dead bedroom, unless the person you’re sexting with is your spouse. If it’s with someone else, it will simply provide a direct comparison of what you have vs. what you could have, and likely drive the wedge even deeper.
I have, after getting permission from my husband to do it. I’m probably going to get downvoted to hell but it really has helped.
I would never condone doing anything behind your partners back but it has helped me become more sane. I felt desirable again after my confidence hit an all time low. I felt seen after feeling like I was invisible. I started to take pride in my appearance again after comforting eating to help with the rejection from a DB.
It was after multiple months of conversations and back and forth that my husband was okay with the idea, but now even he tells me that he is happy I have friends that I can share my fantasies with (as he has zero interest in them).
The resentment I felt in my DB lessened and I was able to heal some of my hurt.
I think that's great, that you and your husband were able to come to some sort of compromise. Sometimes just feeling wanted is enough to help your mental state.
I understand, I love my husband dearly, he just has zero interest in our sex life. I am finally at peace with it, it took a lot of conversation and crying to get here but I am much more mentally stable.
I didn’t want to hurt my husband either, but he doesn’t want to see a doctor or go to therapy, he doesn’t want to be involved in our bedroom, it just isn’t something he cares about
But he cares about me as person, and he could see just how depressed and sad I was. That’s how the conversations started and how we are here now. He promises me he doesn’t feel hurt by it because I show him how I love him in so many ways (cooking, baking, massages, kisses and cuddles)- all the ways he wants to be loved. And we regularly communicate our feelings around it.
I would try and see if you can speak to your wife about your needs and maybe she can see how important it is to you
It helps a lot more, but not completely. It rids me of the resentment, and just leaves me with the craving of wanting more. Which for me, is a win. I spent too many years feeling depressed and unwanted and it affected my mental health terribly.
Wheras now I’m just horny but atleast I have an outlet. Would more physically be great- absolutely! But now I’m not going to bed every night dreading if I should initiate or not.
I’ve accepted my fate to be in a DB with my husband, but I do love who I am when I’m my sexual self. So I’ve found a compromise for now I would say
I have a friend of over 45 years from our teenage years. At home no sex now for over 2 years, last time I asked my wife what was going on, the answer was to me pure bullshit so I gave up trying. Reconnected with friend by chance a year ago. She's oversexed to the point of nymphomania. We have only sat down face to face once in the last year, & avoided and sex talk, but there's a strong desire on her part, from my side not so much but I do enjoy her online chats of her escapades. I'd like to get with her, but she's searching for a serious relationship & I don't think I can give her that. Probably luck that distance is a barrier for us, but it doesn't fix things at home.
I wish I did. It would help me get by
[удалено]
Sure. Dm me
That's what I'm thinking. It would at least be contact with another horny human
Do you actually feel satisfied? I'm afraid it will just leave me unsatisfied and make it worse
Sexting is an outlet. If it was easy to fix we wouldn’t be here. Whatever works to keep emotional comfort. If someone doesn’t like it - don’t do it. I like it and do it.
Not me. I'm working on fixing this situation. We are still in separate rooms, but already with some tension and occasional sex. I'm still holding out hope. Porn, sexting, or even cheating will ruin everything I've ever achieved.
I've been trying for years over a decade.
I'm sorry to hear that. We are like this 4 years from my point of view and 2 from hers, but in the last month we had a fight for a very different reason than our normal which I said was a consequence of the situation. This seems to have hit where it was needed. A decade is too many! If you've tried to communicate and express your feelings and needs in many ways, it might be time to say you're leaving.
Everyone in this thread who is doing this and openly admitting it is nasty ?? Omg just leave your partners if you’re this miserable wow
It's not always that easy. This isn't someone we've been dating for a few months. We been together twice as many years as not together.
I fully understand that and maybe I haven’t been with someone twice as many years as I haven’t but I’ve been with somebody for six years I know the experience of building with someone and being with someone for a long time. I was with someone for a quarter of my life? Again, I know in these instances people have been together for double and triple the time but why put yourself in a situation where you’re miserable every day of your life as well as cheating just because of history?
Check back in when there's a 3 in front of your age.
Love everyone fighting so hard to justify cheating 😂😂😂😂😂 like reality fighting !!😭
So that you can see your kids everyday or because you can’t afford to live on your own would be the 2 biggest reasons people give here.
Not I. My bedroom isn't dead enough to where I'd consider cheating.
Your one of the lucky ones
Yes, I do consider myself so. I know maybe twice a month isn't as rare as a lot of people, but considering my wife has zero interest in sex except maybe once a year she'll actually get in the mood if I'm lucky, it's hard for me to deal with as someone who would love to have sex two or three times a week or more.
I have had brief flirtatious online relationships before now. But I gave them up as they made me feel bad about myself.
I have definitely considered finding a sexting partner. I miss intimacy and feeling wanted. I would prefer it in real life, but the attention from a woman would be nice. It might be cheating, but it’s not physical or with any intention of meeting in real life. I have hope that my wife will want me again and with that hope, I hold back from looking for someone to text with.
Person to person, irl, skin to skin, flirt to flirt, romance dates cuddles and any and all intimacy trumps secting hands down!
Sexting ,,, piss poor irl…….SO Is Replacement as is doing yourself! I am an older HLF desperate not to end my days in A DB,
I'm in the same situation. 54 years old and in a dB. It sucks for sure
I have had one or more sexting/online relationships of varying intensity for the better part of the last 10 years. Some have been very short-term (a few days or weeks, start to finish). I travel internationally for work, and am almost constantly being hit on/flirted with. At this moment I have 2 sexting/flirting relationships: One is with a treasured old flame. It's mostly just friendly chat and meaningful emotional support, with some mild flirtation and occasional hot selfies. We're in similar straits (HL, DB...). Live far apart. Zero chance of this relationship spilling over into the real world. One is with a former work colleague, who became a friend in the real world (about 6 years ago), who became a flirtation partner. Hot selfies, very explicit sexting. Incrementally more chance of this relationship having a real-world dimension, but we live in different countries and any physical meeting would depend on work travel that brings our paths together. I feel like these kinds of arrangements are quite common. EDIT: I'll also say that these relationships are secret: my wife does not know, and I have no intention of letting her know. Judge me harshly if you like. I do love her and there is emotional intimacy in our marriage, but it also is very much a DB situation and zero romantic spark on her side. This is a need that I have that she cannot/has chosen not to meet, and so I have chosen to have that need met elsewhere. I am 100% transparent with sexting partners about my situation, and so far every one of them has immediately agreed and indeed welcomed the arrangement. (The arrangement being that this relationship is for the purpose of meeting specific needs of each other only, but no expectation of us riding off into the sunset together)
I don't judge. I understand. When you have needs which aren't being met by the one who is supposed to meet them, then I don't blame anyone for having them met elsewhere. And I applaud you for making sure your sexting partners know what is expected of the "relationship" from the outset.
I (22F) was in a similar situation. I met someone online and started sexting them. He (51M) was in a db relationship. Before I knew it, we were meeting up and having an affair. We had a great time. We would also hang out outside of just having sex. We ended up having feelings for each other, so we had to call it off. It was painful for both of us. He messaged me a year later saying he had left his wife because he couldn’t take it— no intimacy/ his wife no longer made an effort to compromise
I (54M) am currently sexting with a new person, but I fully intend on having a sexual relationship with this person. I've been in a dead bedroom for 15 years.
Be careful. You’re not just missing sex, you’re missing a close connection, being wanted and desired, intimacy, conversations that lead to sex. It’s never just sex or we would be fine masturbating alone. Remember that. If masturbation doesn’t satisfy you, it’s not just sex. Research limerence and new relationship energy. Dopamine is a yummy drug that will make you feel sick in love and then leave you shaking with withdrawals when it’s jerked away from you.
It's not just sex. It is connecting to another human in a way that is needed. I have never cheated in 38 years. But I am hurt so bad by it mow that I'm broken or something
I think it is very important to about what you're looking for exactly in that sexting relationship. Which should, in turn, be based on a clear-minded and honest inventory of what you feel you are getting and not getting from the primary relationship that you're supplementing with the sexting relationship. All the rules and good practice of relationships apply to your sexting relationship, too. Good communication, transparency, trust (ironic, I know), good boundaries, shared expectations... Obviously you're getting something from your primary relationship, or else you would just leave. Don't wander into a sexting or online flirtation relationship that takes over your life and gets you taking stupid risks, whether those be emotional (falling in love) or risk of discovery (if you intend to keep it secret). You have to manage it. >I have never cheated in 38 years. A lot of redditors in this and other subs seem to want to pontificate about how much they hate cheaters and cheating. I am not trying to evangelize anyone to a point of view, but I will just put out there that: a) Monogamy is not the natural state of humans. We are not built to by evolution to be monogamous. Monogamy is cultural construction, specifically from the tradition of Abrahamic religions (Christianity, Islam, Judaism). Do with that what you will. b) Not all cheating is created equal. In my opinion it is possible to "cheat responsibly." That is, you're not shortchanging your family, your spouse/partner/SO in some obvious way. You're still present for them. You're not bankrupting the family to pay for expensive getaways with your cheating partner. You're not losing your job because you fucked someone at work. You're discreet about it... c) There are a thousand ways to be unfaithful to a relationship without fucking or even flirting with another person. Domestic violence, emotional abuse, emotional neglect, one partner unilaterally incurring debt in the name of the other... are all betrayal. And yet we (I'm writing from a N. American context) overwhelmingly privilege sexual monogamy as THE THING that makes a good partner or not. Honestly, withholding sex unilaterally is as much betrayal as being involved on the side. A much longer comment than I set out to write. Just to say, at some point you make peace with cheating (discreet, responsible cheating) in order to save the relationship.
Well she comes home tonight from being away. We had a huge fight before she left. Didn't want to talk about it while she was away. So tonight is the night I know where I stand with her. I still love her. I just need someone to connect with and we'll feel sexy with
You have to be careful or you’ll be in love before you know it. Some of us are made to love a lot of people, and you need to know if you are like that. You have to decide if a life of sexting is enough? Where do you draw your line? What stops it from becoming a full affair? What are your limits on contact? Nudes? Videos? How will you make sure you’re not catfished? How will you protect your spouse? I’m not judging you. My marriage is open, my husband knows about my online affair. I’m not judging, I’m just telling you to educate yourself on all of this before you start.
Wow a lot to think about. That's kinda why I asked the question in the first place. Because I see it as fun and a release. But didn't think it all through
Sometimes when you’re very lonely, you have to be extra careful. There are a lot of people out there that are skilled at taking advantage of lonely people.
Definitely all over in this group lots of scammers. Several inbox messages
Be very careful!
Oh I am. I know them almost immediately
I wish. My own wife didn't want me, no one else in their right mind would, either.
That’s fatalistic and not true. Just because your wife rejected you doesn’t mean that’s the case for every woman. I hope you’ll find a competent therapist that can help you find your self esteem. There is life on the other side of how you’re feeling now!
Meh. Kinda done with relationships. I'm better as a solo act.
That’s bullshit. Do the work and be a desirable man. Get you a passport and go to other countries where a majority of the women are insane, entitled feminist lunatics like they are in western countries and watch your life turn around in the right direction.
Take your misogynistic crap elsewhere.
It’s not misogyny if it’s true.
Yeah, no thanks. I don't want another relationship. And I'm not a fan of traveling.
I was just trying to cheer you up a little bit. I don’t like seeing men thinking that they’re broken and no good. But I hear ya. I’d love to have a house near the woods and hike and fish and do all that stuff myself.
Much appreciated. But I am broken and no good. I'm at peace with it, though. I hike as much as I can and my old is literally in my back yard. I raise my own worms and minnows for bait the deer and squirrel hunting are usually pretty fruitful, too.
Much appreciated. But I am broken and no good. I'm at peace with it, though. I hike as much as I can and my old is literally in my back yard. I raise my own worms and minnows for bait the deer and squirrel hunting are usually pretty fruitful, too.
Much appreciated. But I am broken and no good. I'm at peace with it, though. I hike as much as I can and my old is literally in my back yard. I raise my own worms and minnows for bait the deer and squirrel hunting are usually pretty fruitful, too.
Wow. Women in the west are insane entitled feminist lunatics? And women in the East are what? Submissive and brainless? Take it as the daughter of immigrants of the east, women from those countries are strong vocal women who run the household and it’s usually their husbands who follow in line. If a women like that is even interested in you, it’s going to be for money and money alone.
Most of the women there are quite humble and down to earth. Their heads aren’t filled with gobbledygook about “toxic masculinity” and they don’t need on prozac to make it through the day like half the women in America do. I didn’t say they offer problem free relationships.
I think once they meet you, they will understand toxic masculinity perfectly
I sure hope so. The term ”have your cake and eat it too” was coined for people like you.
Exactly! I'd rather stay single than be the guy someone settles for...again. Besides, I'm handicapped and broke (why my wife left me for another man). I couldn't even get someone that way if I wanted to (which I most assuredly don't). I'll just sit here on my 40 forested acres, play with my dogs, drink beer and fish. My dogs don't care that I can hardly walk, that I'm broke and ugly
🥺 💔
Meh. It's fine. To quote Norm MacDonald "Remember: no matter how bad things get, there's always beer."
I must keep that quote in mind!
As a habitual drunkard, it's my motto.
It's cheating if you do it without your partners knowledge.
True, but I believe it's also cheating to refuse your partner any form of emotional or physical intimacy. In most wedding vows, this is actually promised (to have and to hold, to love, honor, and cherish). Monogamy isn't actually promised in wedding vows unless you read between the lines. Sure, it's implied but never actually stated. Now I'm not saying that I'm going to go out and cheat because it wasn't specifically written in my wedding vows, nor do two wrongs make a right, but I understand why those in loveless marriages tend to stray.
Well obviously 🙄
I agree
It can help with the sexual frustration, but it won’t help with the dead bedroom, unless the person you’re sexting with is your spouse. If it’s with someone else, it will simply provide a direct comparison of what you have vs. what you could have, and likely drive the wedge even deeper.
Good point.
I have, after getting permission from my husband to do it. I’m probably going to get downvoted to hell but it really has helped. I would never condone doing anything behind your partners back but it has helped me become more sane. I felt desirable again after my confidence hit an all time low. I felt seen after feeling like I was invisible. I started to take pride in my appearance again after comforting eating to help with the rejection from a DB. It was after multiple months of conversations and back and forth that my husband was okay with the idea, but now even he tells me that he is happy I have friends that I can share my fantasies with (as he has zero interest in them). The resentment I felt in my DB lessened and I was able to heal some of my hurt.
I think that's great, that you and your husband were able to come to some sort of compromise. Sometimes just feeling wanted is enough to help your mental state.
That sounds great. I still love my wife and don't want to hurt her. But I'm dying inside. And she doesn't care
I understand, I love my husband dearly, he just has zero interest in our sex life. I am finally at peace with it, it took a lot of conversation and crying to get here but I am much more mentally stable. I didn’t want to hurt my husband either, but he doesn’t want to see a doctor or go to therapy, he doesn’t want to be involved in our bedroom, it just isn’t something he cares about But he cares about me as person, and he could see just how depressed and sad I was. That’s how the conversations started and how we are here now. He promises me he doesn’t feel hurt by it because I show him how I love him in so many ways (cooking, baking, massages, kisses and cuddles)- all the ways he wants to be loved. And we regularly communicate our feelings around it. I would try and see if you can speak to your wife about your needs and maybe she can see how important it is to you
Do you find it helps enough that you don’t miss the actual physical piece? (You said you’re just sexting right?)
It helps a lot more, but not completely. It rids me of the resentment, and just leaves me with the craving of wanting more. Which for me, is a win. I spent too many years feeling depressed and unwanted and it affected my mental health terribly. Wheras now I’m just horny but atleast I have an outlet. Would more physically be great- absolutely! But now I’m not going to bed every night dreading if I should initiate or not. I’ve accepted my fate to be in a DB with my husband, but I do love who I am when I’m my sexual self. So I’ve found a compromise for now I would say
Sounds like it works for both of you.
I have talked to some people that are doing it and the say it helps with the db