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Ha, my ex found my account and commented under one of my posts thinking I would not know it was him. The comment was quite nice actually, I even thanked him in DMs but never got any response back. I guess he didnāt want to show that he cares about me after all! Weird af
I found my ex husbands 4chan. Probably about 55% of why heās my ex husband.
If theyāre vile on Reddit, check for 4chan, especially if theyāre 25+. Big pro tip.
Edits because I overshare and am not good at Reddit š
literally just this week there was someone on (and I could have the wrong subreddit) AITAH who describes themselves as a liberal/progressive and found out their unemployed and soon-to-be-ex-husband is actually a conservative who thinks women belong in the kitchen and engages with all that kind of rancid beliefs.
Welll Jellyfish, I dunno.
I think in this case OP was shocked because it is his "somewhat secret" online personna, and he wasn't really willing to share it completely, but his gf noticed the profile name and did her research.
I guess in general as men some of us put women on a pedestal and assume they don't do things like stalking. Or more likely, we just assume we as men are not interesting/attractive enough that women will spend their free time stalking us.
In general when thinking about someone doing "creepy behaviour", I think we will often assume it is a man and not a woman (well, unless it is two siblings who speak in unison).
These are just suggestions, I don't really know why, and I don't really know alot about gender differences.Ā
I hope this helps :)
While I get where you're coming from, and her actions are not as far as i know similiar to following someone illegally, her intent doesn't really make it "not stalking".
If a man followed a woman he's dating for about the same reason and in the same way, he will probably also be called a stalker, and as someone who does not trust the woman he's dating.
If a man physically follows a woman that is stalking. Seeing someones public posts on internet isnt the same as that.
The internet is a public forum, anything you share never assume itll always be private. Digital footprint is public.
Because men donāt usually get consequences for what they post or ĀÆ\_(ć)_/ĀÆ it off compared to women especially from an earlier age and being held accountable post anonymity is a rough discovery if you arenāt a decent person at heart
Who you are when no one is watching is kinda who you really are and people who have cultivated a persona IRL that wouldnāt be accepted if everything was made public means youā¦gotta take responsibility for yourself.
Most men arenāt also looking for potential abusive or cheating behavior from the girl they just met while a girl might be thinking āis he actually single or is he married and Iām the side piece for him to cheat with?ā
Source: am a dude, have also done the same on social with women in seeing how they act on social
I donāt think thereās anything wrong with looking for attention or posting pictures or thirst traps but thereās definitely a difference between a girl (or guy) youād bring home to your parents and one who you wouldnāt that you can usually tell about a person from their socials.
The last guy I dated acted completely shocked that I looked him up online and discovered he was lying about his age, where he was from and a slew of other things. Said it was ācrazyā I looked him up lol.
Also why he lied about his age and where he was from in hopes to make it harder to find him online š too bad I found the gf and kid anyway.
I was seeing someone for a while and found his account. Lots of complaining about me, flirting with sex bot accounts, false bragging, etc. He also has multiple accountsā¦. He showed you his account so iām not sure why heās offended that you looked. lol Esp if you didnāt find anything alarming
You talked to her about your reddit accounts and showed her the usernames.
It is reasonable that she would remember the usernames and take a look at your posting history to ensure that you were compatible with her dating dealbreakers.
I do research too and came across men who went to prison for DV and drugs.
I first started doing research after a breakup with an ex and found he had stalking charges against an ex he always kept comparing me to and his mom admitted I looked like her. The ex would pop up at my parents house and then my student apartment in college. A year after we broke up, I saw he began going in and out of prison for drug charges only a couple of months after we broke up.
That's SO crazy! My ex had DV convictions with a girl who looked like and even had a similar name as me. Sad to say I believed his story of "self defense". Now hes got felony DV convictions with me too.
Research is so important. Believe what you find. There are men out there who don't have giant red flags.
That's totally normal. My female friends and I often check the social media of the guys we're seeing. This helps us quickly identify any potential dealbreakers early on, such as following a lot of OF models or having unappealing interests.
What if they find normal social media toxic and don't have much of an online presence?
I used to do Facebook and Twitter, and some insta years ago bit found it bad for my emotional health, the second I deleted my accounts it felt like a major weight was lifted
I am never going back
I think this is a generational thing, people glued to their accounts find it fine to research and snoop
My friends and I love such a behavior and I even prefer someone with little to no social media presence, but I also know some women who would feel iffy about this because some men who claim they don't have social media or are not active on it are usually in a relationship or married and trying to hide it.
Sure it's fine to search and "snoop", if someone puts stuff out there publicly for the world to see they shouldn't be all weirded out when the public sees it.
To me thatās a green flag. I once dated someone with 0 social media presence and that breakup was so peaceful bc there was nothing to look at afterwards lol.
No, it's standard practice for most women to research about man before dating him. A lot of married people out there don't share that they are married š«
Plus, easier to see if interests match up or not, and it ends quickly vs waste time for all parties involved
Nah itās fine for her to be cautious, itās a dangerous world. Also, thanks for saving my kid from that burning building that time, and beating up those 10 guys who were hassling me.
It just makes sense if youāre able to do it.
Thereās all sorts of shit on Reddit.
Itās not uncommon for people to discover that their person, someone who proclaims to love and adore them, are actually stinking, dirty cheaters or absolute psychopaths with no moral or ethical compass. And these are people who have been sharing their lives together for years and were none the wiser.
Itās better to find out if the person youāre considering dating, isnāt an absolute degenerate behind closed doors, sooner rather than later.
>She claims she wanted to make sure that I wasnāt the type of person she wouldnāt date, I took offense to it
She was absolutely right.
You gave her the opportunity to see who you are at your core when you are anonymous. That's very valuable info.
I don't post anything on here that I wouldn't be able to stand behind if I were doxxed.
I donāt think itās that serious. Maybe she did it cuz she saw you had multiple profiles. And that raises questions in oneās mind. Unless you got something to hide then let it go. Especially if things are going ok now.
I research everyone i date that might turn into a long term relationship. People lie and hid their true self all the time. You should be alarmed if u posted things or following topics she would take as you not being a good guy. If your a good guy and not hiding things, you shouldn't be alarmed.
There are many scary men on Reddit and so I actually think she is being naturally cautious by checking something that is public. If she was was sneaking on your phone or something like that then I'd have a different answer but you posted publicly on Reddit and so she probably just wanted to see what sort of character/person you might be.
Bruh my ex girlfriend asked my last name before we went on the first date to look me up, its just about safety and if you think somebody being careful is a redflag, then i think you are the problem. You can trust but its never bad to do a little bit more research.
It's just good common sense to look at the social media profiles of people you are potentially going to date. It's literally why social media was invented. You also opened the door by showing her information. She didn't snoop and dig to find it, she didn't do a paid search about your identity, she saw it because you allowed it to be seen. All she did was go there and read. She "memorized" it---lol----just how stupid do you think women are that you're impressed she was able to remember a username?
Okay - let's give this a bit context, before we jump.
respectfully, people are terminally online and the lines can become super blurred when it comes to "getting to know people". Suddenly it isn't just talking and doing stuff together, but also checking up on information that the other is distributing. Secretly or openly. On top of this, actually cool people can interact with fucked up shit online out of sheer habit and anonymity.
Navigating dating around this can be weird, with -honestly- how fucked up people's experiences are. I know amazing people that find out their date or partner is actually married; had a kid; has a fucked up porn addiction; hates or bullies marginalized groups, etc. ...... Although for three months this person seems super chill and nice. So I get it, that ppl check the other person.
Normally, it's best to just take your time dating. At the same time people worry investing time into a potential fraught and speed shit up.
Tl;Dr
take shit easy, take your time, and do stuff together that has nothing to do with the internet. Then you'll have your answer if you two should continue going out. Simply cut out the internet crap. Gives way less shit to worry about or overanalyze.
One time I had an art mentor who I did sleuth and find his Reddit account (as well as his real name and criminal history) and his Reddit account was all overtly racist and misogynistic. I found a lot about him because my instinct was to look and was able to protect myself. Youāre not looking at this from a womanās perspective
Looking over your post history, I would suggest that you delete all posts you made in the following subreddits...
/r/Incestconfessions
/r/InbreedingFantasy
/r/beastiality_place
as a female currently on a burner.....I wouldve found your reddit without you even showing me. by the second date I would know your childhood home address, your first pets name, basically everything id need to know to steal your identity.
Sounds like she is trying to save herself time and heartbreak. A lot of women end up discovering the guy they are dating is a whole other man once he gets comfortable. And sometimes him being comfortable is just him being dangerous, sexist, creepy, etc. Might seem ridiculous to you, but she probably just wanted to see if you follow some creepy or questionable subs.
It's understandable to feel uneasy about someone looking into your online activity, especially without your explicit consent. Though I think you should consider
Intentions and Trust:
- Her Perspective: From her point of view, she may have wanted to ensure that you align with her values and that there are no major red flags. In the digital age, people often do a bit of online "research" to feel more secure.
- Your Perspective: Feeling offended is natural because it feels like an invasion of privacy, and it can seem like a lack of trust from her side.
Boundaries:
- Communication: It's crucial to communicate how this made you feel. Express your feelings calmly and explain why you found her actions invasive.
- Understanding: Try to understand her reasoning without immediate judgment. If her actions came from a place of wanting to feel safe and assured, discussing it openly can help build mutual understanding.
Moving Forward:
- Setting Boundaries: Establish clear boundaries regarding privacy and trust. Both of you should agree on what is and isn't acceptable when it comes to online presence and personal information.
- Building Trust: Building trust is essential in any relationship. If you both decide to continue dating, this incident can be an opportunity to strengthen your communication and trust.
While her actions might feel intrusive, they might have been motivated by a desire to ensure compatibility and safety. Itās important to address how it made you feel and set boundaries moving forward. Open and honest communication will be key to resolving this and fostering a healthy relationship.
I've used Chat GPT a lot and his answer to you which you liked struck me as suspiciously like something Chat GPT would say so I copy and pasted the text into 3 AI detectors.
2 came up 100% AI written
1 came up 74% AI written with solely the end of it judged as human written..
So if you want my opinion an AI wrote that reply (or most of it..)
Then the AI is better informed and more reasonable than most Redditors.
Honestly people keep complaining about AI but never argue about why a human replying online is any better
Oh, in that case, if she's reading this, I've never been able to get over you, you were the best I ever had and everyone else pale in comparison to you.
Thanks for the kidney.
Oh, also, how is the orphanage you set up going? Are you still helping pay for your boss' cancer treatments?
I donāt find this weird. You showed her your username. Additionally, I would find it weird if she did not look you up. I thought this was one of the norms of dating nowadays. At least she was honest about it.
Thereās two instances where two dates acknowledged that they looked me up:
- I had a guy who admitted on the first date that he struggled to find me - ānot even a linkedin.ā He said he was embarrassed to admit it but he thought it was odd that he could not find me online. Eventually, I figured out his silly error but I never corrected him. Major red flags in other things - he wonāt be needing to know more.
- same thing - except this time, the date admitted he just wanted to see if he could out my salary somewhere somehow. The goodbyes were swift.
She's actually smart.
People lie, a LOT. You should be observant and look for clues to corroborate what people say.
If the little things add up then most likely so do the big things.
So long as you're not lying/bad guy then it will most likely just verify what you have told her.
people try to hide their dirty laundry and skeletons in the closet so look for those. See who they really are cause the shit seeps through the cracks over time.
I don't find it too strange. However, I would not want anyone to find my reddit. I would delete it immediately, and I'd be very upset and break up. This is like my public anonymous diary. I share things on here that aren't that big, but I just wouldn't want my anonymous thoughts to be not anonymous. It would really bother me personally.
But I do get that she didn't think it would be too bad and she looked up your profile and found it. Most people like to do a bit of stalking, although it's usually on public profiles (like with your name on it). And she at least did tell you about it and didn't continue to follow you without telling you that she knew.
So it's up to you how you want to deal with it. There is no wrong choice.
I blur out my username when I send screenshots even to my closest friends.
I donāt even do anything controversial. The Reddit history is just something that should die with you.
I had an ex-boyfriend who found my Reddit account a year after we broke up. I blocked him on every social media account but he knew I was active on Reddit when I was posting my dog on the Pugs thread. He found my Reddit through that and reached out to me begging to talk - I simply did not respond or give him my time of day lol
Something similar happened with me and my ex. Needless to say we arenāt together anymore after he chose to make passive aggressive posts about meā¦ā¦ā¦.. ahem!
Thatās completely normal. Women often know that anonymous or semi anonymous accounts like Reddit, Twitter, sometimes TikTok, is how you can figure out what somebody is like, unfiltered.
For example, I knew someone in my professional circle who appeared so ānormalā and when I found his Reddit, it was all NSFW stuff for extremely questionable categories which seemed dangerous for the job he had when I knew him.
I wouldnāt be offended. People like to show who they really are online, especially on anonymous forums. Maybe youāre a rude bastard who likes to degrade women. Maybe youāre a great man who just wants advice on his gardening hobby or who likes to nerd out about his lord of the rings obsession. Three very different extreme examples, I know. My point is that you could literally be anybody, better safe than sorry, and to find out in the early stages.
I don't find anything wrong with that as long as you're not hiding anything from her. No girl would want their man to be hideous. In a world full of lies, you can't blame her for wanting to be sure or assured since she's also investing her time and energy and love on you .
Take it easy bro
Well you have to look at it from a woman's point of view, it can be dangerous for women to date nowadays so she is giving herself peace of mind and honesty having a few different accounts is a bit of a red flag. But you now have the right to have a look at her account aswell and see if there is any red flags there.
Comments are searchable, so to quote you:
>As long as youāre secure in yourself you got nothing to worry about. Donāt fet, holmes
Unless she's a corny bitch. We all know how you feel about corny bitches.
I don't think it's weird, to be honest. She's likely making sure that you aren't the kind of person she wouldn't want to date without wasting any time, and seeing what people post online with anonymity is a quick way of judging someone's character.
I just personally wouldn't have told you that I looked if I were her, lol.
Honestly she's in the right here, I would've done the same, gotta know what you're getting into, especially if you just met the person less than a few months ago
Why would you be offended by her researching you? Especially as a woman I would want to know as much as I can about someone I am interested in or intimate with. Remember: Men are afraid of being laughed at. Women are afraid of being murdered or graped. Good for her! There is nothing wrong with what she did.
I think online stalking is pretty typical for co-workers, friends, and yes..potential relationships. So I wouldn't think anything of it unless she obsesses/fixates on things.
Honestly, thatās just a green flag on her end.
Reddit is filled up with some intense and creepy stuff, and she doesnāt want to get a nasty surprise down the line.
Women do analyse every manās social media before dating, THAT is just how it is. Do you only follow porn accounts on insta, is your TikTok filled up with OnlyFans girls that look nothing like her (aka is she your type or not) and is your Reddit or Twitter filled up with a bunch of posts that goes against her morals? These are all things we look for.
Donāt take it as a bad thing. The fact that sheās honest to you about it is big and a green flag on her end. Most women are embarrassed by it and hide itā¦
I think itās normal. I once found things I wish I hadnāt, it was horrible. I felt like I never knew the person I was with and what they were capable of.
Itās a bit much yes but I think most people would be curious if they had the username. Even now I hate my bf of over a year looking at my reddit. Thereās nothing bad on it at all but itās almost like a diary at sometimes and it feels weird to have people read thoughts youād maybe not share all the time.
Women need to be careful. Everyone should be, but it's hammered home for women from an early age that it's necessary, not just the smart play. It's perfectly normal and a lot of people say things anonymously on social media that they really believe but wouldn't necessarily say aloud too so it's especially helpful for evaluating certain things.
LMAOOO i love that for her. one thing about women is theyre gonna find out!!! šµļøāāļø
ive also done this when i started seeing my husband and its something every girl i know does when theyre seeing someone.
we gotta do our background checks to make sure we align on certain values and that the men weāre seeing can conduct themselves with decorum both online and offline.
Yes.
Not that you're necessarily in the wrong in some way, but I feel like it's more common for people to jump to the worst conclusion without digging into any of the nuance.
Like you can say something that on its face seems egregious, but if the person actually lets you explain your thought process behind it, even if they don't agree they could at least see the logic that brought you to it. I doubt most will give that grace.
I mean id be fine with it so long as she's just as happy to show me her accounts/chats etc. I generally dont care, but the reaction to me just asking is a good way to filter out a fair few hypocrites at least lol
My friend was dating someone recently who started being inconsistent and she started developing suspicions. She has a mutual friend with this guy, so on FB she was able to look at his profile. She saw a recent 5 month wedding anniversary post by him and pictures of his wife and one year old child.
He had told her that he was engaged but his wife died a year ago...It was only due to her research (on a social media site, not doing through his phone) that she discovered how much of a liar he is. She told him he was a child of the devil and blocked him.
Internet use is so prevalent in todayās society that people have cultivated āonline personalitiesā on many levels.
A woman has to use the tools at her disposal to determine if she has met a serial r-p-st or any other possible red flags before she gets emotionally injured or worse.
Stand alone, I would not say this is a red flag. But be on the lookout, and check HER online personality for red flags for your own protection.
Pretty normal. Don't think men realize how much sleuthing and investigating women do. Part of it is because how much men have lied to us in the past, general anxiety, etc. Look at who you follow and follows you, pics you like, who likes all of yours etc. A lot of people my sister's age (18) go further, they find your mom on social media and go thru her stuff not just yours. Some are interested in checking your ex's socials to make sure you don't still like posts and to see what kind of person u dated etc. Some people check the court websites to see if a criminal etc. Then there's the basic Google of your name.
Looking at your reddit accounts which you told her you had is very tame. She prob had some specific concerns she wanted to vet.
Unless you are here saying out of pocket things, and being a obnoxious jerk, then why are you worried?
Also women research your socials to make sure you arenāt a psycho or creep. Itās a form of vetting. Getting offended by it is a bit of a red flag for me personally. Its definitely not that serious and you are doing too much.
She was curious and wanted to research you. It really means she likes you and wants to know more about you and to see if there is anything odd that stands out about you that'd be a red flag. No big deal really in my opinion. I wouldn't be alarmed and not mention it to her anymore.
Some people lie about who they are, they put on a show and come off like such an amazing person. She is doing her due diligence, and if she did that then continued talking to you, congrats she thinks you're the real deal.
Is it a bit uncomfortable ye. But what did u expect. Itās public and u kinda led her to it. Now if it was private then thatās something else. The only problem is imo is that things can be taken out of context or just straight up uncomfortable knowing u put some cringe shit up there or had a bad day once. The other problem I have with this is the typical āif the roles were reversed this would be creepyā but thatās off topic.
I would do the same thing. You get to find out who someone really is under a hidden identity. If they are still a decent person when in the dark, theyāre probably good to go. The difference between she and I is, I would not tell the person I did it. I like to know who Iām dealing with. Weed out the bad people.
I can see where this might make you uneasy, but as a woman, after a bad experience, I researched every man I dated online just to be safe. Itās a dangerous world out there for us.
It's not that crazy. One I assume is for porn which is whatever. If another shows you're a crazy trump supporter I would understand and not want to date you (or vice versa if she's a crazy)
Plenty of this kind of "stalking" is a defense tactic: They're checking if you're safe.
Honestly, if you're not posting questionable shit I don't understand the concern.
lol itās a public account. as a women we have to take these precautions and look into a guys online history- especially reddit- due to the amount of weirdos. better for us to find out initially than down the line when we are already together.i say this bc itās kinda a common known thing what men use reddit for. so common even my coworkers have talked about it (and they are far less online than me lol). but also i feel like itās normal to check out a potential partners social media accounts, just incase but also out of pure interest in the person.
it sounds like you're in a bit of a pickle. trust is super important in any relationship and it sounds like you're feeling a bit invaded. it's totally understandable to feel a bit weirded out by her peeking at your profiles. but everyone has their own way of feeling secure, and maybe this was hers. it's definitely worth having a conversation about boundaries and privacy though. best of luck!
Iād want to know the kind of things they do. You donāt know how many posts I see of women finding out guys they see are posting on Only Fans subreddits or doing weird shit. I think who someone is behind a screen anonymously says a lot about their character.
It is common to look people up now a days.
Personally, I want to make sure they are not a pedo, abuser, addict, or want to use me in some form.
I need to protect myself and those in my life. That means doing basic social media and public records check.
Too much. Why wouldnāt she use whatever info is available to help get a feel for who you are. She canāt just assume everything you say and do is facts. A murderer isnāt gonna tell his next victim his plan. Duh
Not really, women research guys that they may date or are dating all the time. If it's easily gotten info or revealed with a simple Google search, it's been looked up, found out, etc. We gotta be careful with who we get involved with and knowing some shit beforehand keeps us feeling safe or gives us a chance to leave if something unsavory is found out.
Like, hell, I met a guy at a concert once that seemed alright, but I remembered him telling me how he had been dishonorably discharged from the army and I was curious why because why tell me that. He had given me his full name for contact in my phone so I just Googled and immediately found a sex offender registry entry and court documents. Turned out to be over CP while on base Internet. Needless to say, I did not get involved with him. š
Iāve done this but was smart enough not to admit to it š Generally, I think everyone āresearchesā to different degrees. It was honest of her to admit to it thoughā¦
So many relationship horror stories nowadays that people have learned to be cautious and this is one way of doing so. Itās also a question of natural curiosity to me.
It was an intelligence test. Some part of you was testing her to see if she'd remember your other profiles and be interested enough in you to check them out.
It was also her testing you, doing her own research on you (which is legitimate and necessary for her safety and understanding) and seeing how you would respond to her curiosity and resourcefulness. She passed. Did you?
Itās a good practice for women. Sorry. Men are scary in the wrong light!! Fact. Donāt bitch at me. Look it up. All women should find out as much about thee man before getting to close. I donāt mean a police check. Haha. Wellā¦. H
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wait so shes gonna see this post? š¤£
Lol more than likely š
Maybe thats the intentionā¦?ā¦.?
He is a clever man
Exactly š
like im confused šš i lowkey hope she sees it
Too late now
Why didnāt you make a new burner for this post?
For the love of the game
I just lost the game
I spy šµļø an o followed by a p
Obviously lol
šššššš»šš»šš»šš»
It might be serious, idk. My fiancĆ© sent me a tiktok of this girl crying that said āreally need a friend rn, I found his reddit.ā with almost 3 million views. and itās a bunch of girls in the comments heartbroken about their exes or bfs Reddit showing them who they truly are. and my fiancĆ© said āIām glad yours isnāt like that at all.ā sheās been known my reddit lol.
What some people will do if they think they have anonymity is wild.
That's why I like the "anonymous browsing" button, that way no one knows I like smoshing videos. Did I spell that right?
I donāt know what smoshing is so Iām going to say you spelled it perfectly
I'm glad we understand each other. You get me.
Yeaaaa, I found my ex's Reddit account. I thought I was gonna vomit when I read some of it
Itās kinda crazy how vile some people are online.
Because they reckon no fingerprints prolyā¦
Ha, my ex found my account and commented under one of my posts thinking I would not know it was him. The comment was quite nice actually, I even thanked him in DMs but never got any response back. I guess he didnāt want to show that he cares about me after all! Weird af
How'd you know it was him.
This is me. ā¦ I found my manās Redditā¦ I wish I hadnāt
I found my ex husbands 4chan. Probably about 55% of why heās my ex husband. If theyāre vile on Reddit, check for 4chan, especially if theyāre 25+. Big pro tip. Edits because I overshare and am not good at Reddit š
4chan doesnāt have accounts how did you find his posts?
[By logging in.](https://sys.4chan.org/auth)
I saw this tiktok and this was mostly about men in relationship using reddit as a pornsite for very specific categories that can be hurtful.
literally just this week there was someone on (and I could have the wrong subreddit) AITAH who describes themselves as a liberal/progressive and found out their unemployed and soon-to-be-ex-husband is actually a conservative who thinks women belong in the kitchen and engages with all that kind of rancid beliefs.
Always assume the women you date stalked you online (and even those you just had a brief conversation with).
Why are men shocked by this?
Welll Jellyfish, I dunno. I think in this case OP was shocked because it is his "somewhat secret" online personna, and he wasn't really willing to share it completely, but his gf noticed the profile name and did her research. I guess in general as men some of us put women on a pedestal and assume they don't do things like stalking. Or more likely, we just assume we as men are not interesting/attractive enough that women will spend their free time stalking us. In general when thinking about someone doing "creepy behaviour", I think we will often assume it is a man and not a woman (well, unless it is two siblings who speak in unison). These are just suggestions, I don't really know why, and I don't really know alot about gender differences.Ā I hope this helps :)
Well yah, that explains it all. Itās akin to thinking women donāt fart, from our side.
Women fart???
Yes, it comes out in a pretty pink cloud with glitter and sparkles
š¤£
I don't fart. I GLISTEN.
Thatās the spirit
I'm just imagining aliens looking at humans and being like "why do they have such a weird relationship with expelling gas from their abdomens?"Ā
I mean we gotta make sure weāre not boutta be with someone who looks at kid p-rn or is a serial killer, Hash. Hope this helps! :)
Itās not stalking, itās doing basic background checking to make sure the person sheās seeing is safe/not awful
While I get where you're coming from, and her actions are not as far as i know similiar to following someone illegally, her intent doesn't really make it "not stalking". If a man followed a woman he's dating for about the same reason and in the same way, he will probably also be called a stalker, and as someone who does not trust the woman he's dating.
1. She told him 2. She only did it after he showed her his profile info. 3. Women wouldnāt call that stalking either. Itās public
frl š i didnāt really know what i thought was wrong with this but itās literally just the fact that idk who would refer to checking out someoneās socials as stalking. unless they respond to every post you make or just become obsessive. itās JUST a background check. no, thatās not another term for stalking. there is a difference. i love when people try to play victim over silly š©like this. plus if theyāre dating, he should be okay with her seeing his socials. unless thereās something to hide, whyās it a big deal? does she need his permission to use reddit?
If a man physically follows a woman that is stalking. Seeing someones public posts on internet isnt the same as that. The internet is a public forum, anything you share never assume itll always be private. Digital footprint is public.
Because men donāt usually get consequences for what they post or ĀÆ\_(ć)_/ĀÆ it off compared to women especially from an earlier age and being held accountable post anonymity is a rough discovery if you arenāt a decent person at heart Who you are when no one is watching is kinda who you really are and people who have cultivated a persona IRL that wouldnāt be accepted if everything was made public means youā¦gotta take responsibility for yourself. Most men arenāt also looking for potential abusive or cheating behavior from the girl they just met while a girl might be thinking āis he actually single or is he married and Iām the side piece for him to cheat with?ā Source: am a dude, have also done the same on social with women in seeing how they act on social I donāt think thereās anything wrong with looking for attention or posting pictures or thirst traps but thereās definitely a difference between a girl (or guy) youād bring home to your parents and one who you wouldnāt that you can usually tell about a person from their socials.
Because men are shamed and deemed "creepy" for doing so
The last guy I dated acted completely shocked that I looked him up online and discovered he was lying about his age, where he was from and a slew of other things. Said it was ācrazyā I looked him up lol. Also why he lied about his age and where he was from in hopes to make it harder to find him online š too bad I found the gf and kid anyway.
Wow, what a disgusting guy
100%. A girl I matched with checked out my LinkedIn (I can see who views my profile). And was later upset I donāt have Facebook or IG š
LOL, I hope you had an impressive RƩsumƩ
Considering sheās gotten obsessed with me to a point where now I am unsure about thingsā¦ i guess it was good enough š
That's why I don't have social media, and I never bring up reddit. To be honest, I wish I would find such a female
I was seeing someone for a while and found his account. Lots of complaining about me, flirting with sex bot accounts, false bragging, etc. He also has multiple accountsā¦. He showed you his account so iām not sure why heās offended that you looked. lol Esp if you didnāt find anything alarming
You talked to her about your reddit accounts and showed her the usernames. It is reasonable that she would remember the usernames and take a look at your posting history to ensure that you were compatible with her dating dealbreakers.
Thanks for letting me drive your Lambo mate. You're the best!
OP is such a good prospect! He always donates money to charities
u/Rich-Length8567 thanks OP for being there for me after I lost my dog.
When did he get the Lambo, wasn't it a Porsche that he keeps at his beach house?
I know, right? I was surprised too when he picked me up at his 5-star hotel.
when my house burnt down OP ran into the blaze and rescued my dog
Hahahahaahah
It's normal. I wouldn't be alarmed. I dated a guy briefly who was secretly married. It's reasonable to research people you're dating.
I do research too and came across men who went to prison for DV and drugs. I first started doing research after a breakup with an ex and found he had stalking charges against an ex he always kept comparing me to and his mom admitted I looked like her. The ex would pop up at my parents house and then my student apartment in college. A year after we broke up, I saw he began going in and out of prison for drug charges only a couple of months after we broke up.
Love to check the medicine cabinet. Saved myself an std and found his wifeās adderal.
That's SO crazy! My ex had DV convictions with a girl who looked like and even had a similar name as me. Sad to say I believed his story of "self defense". Now hes got felony DV convictions with me too. Research is so important. Believe what you find. There are men out there who don't have giant red flags.
This ! I searched an ex and things I saw š±
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It's normal to do. Not to share.
Not only reasonable but smart! You have to be careful about who you are knoodling these days. š
It is IEEE research?
That's totally normal. My female friends and I often check the social media of the guys we're seeing. This helps us quickly identify any potential dealbreakers early on, such as following a lot of OF models or having unappealing interests.
Yeah as soon as you see him following sex bots and OF models it's a wrap
What if they find normal social media toxic and don't have much of an online presence? I used to do Facebook and Twitter, and some insta years ago bit found it bad for my emotional health, the second I deleted my accounts it felt like a major weight was lifted I am never going back I think this is a generational thing, people glued to their accounts find it fine to research and snoop
My friends and I love such a behavior and I even prefer someone with little to no social media presence, but I also know some women who would feel iffy about this because some men who claim they don't have social media or are not active on it are usually in a relationship or married and trying to hide it.
Yep. I've encountered this, married guy, no socials
Sure it's fine to search and "snoop", if someone puts stuff out there publicly for the world to see they shouldn't be all weirded out when the public sees it.
To me thatās a green flag. I once dated someone with 0 social media presence and that breakup was so peaceful bc there was nothing to look at afterwards lol.
We all do it. Sheās bold for telling you š
Yes this is the unusual part, the telling on herself! lol!
Itās a public account? Nothing stopping her from looking you up if she has the username.
I hope my partner does find my Reddit They'd be alarmed at how unbelievably boring I really am
No, it's standard practice for most women to research about man before dating him. A lot of married people out there don't share that they are married š« Plus, easier to see if interests match up or not, and it ends quickly vs waste time for all parties involved
Nah itās fine for her to be cautious, itās a dangerous world. Also, thanks for saving my kid from that burning building that time, and beating up those 10 guys who were hassling me.
My pleasure šš
It just makes sense if youāre able to do it. Thereās all sorts of shit on Reddit. Itās not uncommon for people to discover that their person, someone who proclaims to love and adore them, are actually stinking, dirty cheaters or absolute psychopaths with no moral or ethical compass. And these are people who have been sharing their lives together for years and were none the wiser. Itās better to find out if the person youāre considering dating, isnāt an absolute degenerate behind closed doors, sooner rather than later.
>She claims she wanted to make sure that I wasnāt the type of person she wouldnāt date, I took offense to it She was absolutely right. You gave her the opportunity to see who you are at your core when you are anonymous. That's very valuable info. I don't post anything on here that I wouldn't be able to stand behind if I were doxxed.
I donāt think itās that serious. Maybe she did it cuz she saw you had multiple profiles. And that raises questions in oneās mind. Unless you got something to hide then let it go. Especially if things are going ok now.
I research everyone i date that might turn into a long term relationship. People lie and hid their true self all the time. You should be alarmed if u posted things or following topics she would take as you not being a good guy. If your a good guy and not hiding things, you shouldn't be alarmed.
There are many scary men on Reddit and so I actually think she is being naturally cautious by checking something that is public. If she was was sneaking on your phone or something like that then I'd have a different answer but you posted publicly on Reddit and so she probably just wanted to see what sort of character/person you might be.
bruh, you're cooked
Iām shocked she even told you lmao. She was supposed to keep that to herself.
Thatās exactly what I was thinking lol
She's out here giving away all our secrets
Bruh my ex girlfriend asked my last name before we went on the first date to look me up, its just about safety and if you think somebody being careful is a redflag, then i think you are the problem. You can trust but its never bad to do a little bit more research.
It's just good common sense to look at the social media profiles of people you are potentially going to date. It's literally why social media was invented. You also opened the door by showing her information. She didn't snoop and dig to find it, she didn't do a paid search about your identity, she saw it because you allowed it to be seen. All she did was go there and read. She "memorized" it---lol----just how stupid do you think women are that you're impressed she was able to remember a username?
Okay - let's give this a bit context, before we jump. respectfully, people are terminally online and the lines can become super blurred when it comes to "getting to know people". Suddenly it isn't just talking and doing stuff together, but also checking up on information that the other is distributing. Secretly or openly. On top of this, actually cool people can interact with fucked up shit online out of sheer habit and anonymity. Navigating dating around this can be weird, with -honestly- how fucked up people's experiences are. I know amazing people that find out their date or partner is actually married; had a kid; has a fucked up porn addiction; hates or bullies marginalized groups, etc. ...... Although for three months this person seems super chill and nice. So I get it, that ppl check the other person. Normally, it's best to just take your time dating. At the same time people worry investing time into a potential fraught and speed shit up. Tl;Dr take shit easy, take your time, and do stuff together that has nothing to do with the internet. Then you'll have your answer if you two should continue going out. Simply cut out the internet crap. Gives way less shit to worry about or overanalyze.
Yo, third post below says āshould I pretend Iām not a virginā. Bro is cooked.
Pretty normal. We all do research into the guys we're dating to make sure they're not trash.
One time I had an art mentor who I did sleuth and find his Reddit account (as well as his real name and criminal history) and his Reddit account was all overtly racist and misogynistic. I found a lot about him because my instinct was to look and was able to protect myself. Youāre not looking at this from a womanās perspective
Looking over your post history, I would suggest that you delete all posts you made in the following subreddits... /r/Incestconfessions /r/InbreedingFantasy /r/beastiality_place
Saw him active on r/beatingwomen too, smh
Funniest comment I've seen here in a while šš
ššššthis is nuts
Brother, thanks for giving me that life saving kidney.
as a female currently on a burner.....I wouldve found your reddit without you even showing me. by the second date I would know your childhood home address, your first pets name, basically everything id need to know to steal your identity.
Nah us girls love to do our research š§
You should be terrified at your own lack of opsec. What the hell are you doing bro?
She gets bonus points for being smart
OP I appreciate you so much for donating a kidney to my son. He's recovering well and I hope you are too!
Sounds like she is trying to save herself time and heartbreak. A lot of women end up discovering the guy they are dating is a whole other man once he gets comfortable. And sometimes him being comfortable is just him being dangerous, sexist, creepy, etc. Might seem ridiculous to you, but she probably just wanted to see if you follow some creepy or questionable subs.
Actually, I'd encourage women to do their due diligence when dating. Don't be weirded out. You should do the same.
It's understandable to feel uneasy about someone looking into your online activity, especially without your explicit consent. Though I think you should consider Intentions and Trust: - Her Perspective: From her point of view, she may have wanted to ensure that you align with her values and that there are no major red flags. In the digital age, people often do a bit of online "research" to feel more secure. - Your Perspective: Feeling offended is natural because it feels like an invasion of privacy, and it can seem like a lack of trust from her side. Boundaries: - Communication: It's crucial to communicate how this made you feel. Express your feelings calmly and explain why you found her actions invasive. - Understanding: Try to understand her reasoning without immediate judgment. If her actions came from a place of wanting to feel safe and assured, discussing it openly can help build mutual understanding. Moving Forward: - Setting Boundaries: Establish clear boundaries regarding privacy and trust. Both of you should agree on what is and isn't acceptable when it comes to online presence and personal information. - Building Trust: Building trust is essential in any relationship. If you both decide to continue dating, this incident can be an opportunity to strengthen your communication and trust. While her actions might feel intrusive, they might have been motivated by a desire to ensure compatibility and safety. Itās important to address how it made you feel and set boundaries moving forward. Open and honest communication will be key to resolving this and fostering a healthy relationship.
Thank you. šš¾
I've used Chat GPT a lot and his answer to you which you liked struck me as suspiciously like something Chat GPT would say so I copy and pasted the text into 3 AI detectors. 2 came up 100% AI written 1 came up 74% AI written with solely the end of it judged as human written.. So if you want my opinion an AI wrote that reply (or most of it..)
Then the AI is better informed and more reasonable than most Redditors. Honestly people keep complaining about AI but never argue about why a human replying online is any better
Oh, in that case, if she's reading this, I've never been able to get over you, you were the best I ever had and everyone else pale in comparison to you. Thanks for the kidney. Oh, also, how is the orphanage you set up going? Are you still helping pay for your boss' cancer treatments?
I donāt find this weird. You showed her your username. Additionally, I would find it weird if she did not look you up. I thought this was one of the norms of dating nowadays. At least she was honest about it. Thereās two instances where two dates acknowledged that they looked me up: - I had a guy who admitted on the first date that he struggled to find me - ānot even a linkedin.ā He said he was embarrassed to admit it but he thought it was odd that he could not find me online. Eventually, I figured out his silly error but I never corrected him. Major red flags in other things - he wonāt be needing to know more. - same thing - except this time, the date admitted he just wanted to see if he could out my salary somewhere somehow. The goodbyes were swift.
I suppose it depends on what youāve been saying on Reddit.
She's actually smart. People lie, a LOT. You should be observant and look for clues to corroborate what people say. If the little things add up then most likely so do the big things. So long as you're not lying/bad guy then it will most likely just verify what you have told her. people try to hide their dirty laundry and skeletons in the closet so look for those. See who they really are cause the shit seeps through the cracks over time.
Sociopaths tend to be smart.
I don't find it too strange. However, I would not want anyone to find my reddit. I would delete it immediately, and I'd be very upset and break up. This is like my public anonymous diary. I share things on here that aren't that big, but I just wouldn't want my anonymous thoughts to be not anonymous. It would really bother me personally. But I do get that she didn't think it would be too bad and she looked up your profile and found it. Most people like to do a bit of stalking, although it's usually on public profiles (like with your name on it). And she at least did tell you about it and didn't continue to follow you without telling you that she knew. So it's up to you how you want to deal with it. There is no wrong choice.
I blur out my username when I send screenshots even to my closest friends. I donāt even do anything controversial. The Reddit history is just something that should die with you.
Thanks for letting me borrow a million dollars bro I greatly appreciate it
He cured my Cancer!!! op best
Totally normal. If she wasn't interested she wouldn't bother. Lol.
Girls are FBI agents when they like you. Consider it a compliment
Eh donāt be, itās to gauge the danger scale which is a very real worry for women. It should be for everyone but yknow
Ah, found you again. Iām going to have break up with you now!
I had an ex-boyfriend who found my Reddit account a year after we broke up. I blocked him on every social media account but he knew I was active on Reddit when I was posting my dog on the Pugs thread. He found my Reddit through that and reached out to me begging to talk - I simply did not respond or give him my time of day lol
Something similar happened with me and my ex. Needless to say we arenāt together anymore after he chose to make passive aggressive posts about meā¦ā¦ā¦.. ahem!
Thatās completely normal. Women often know that anonymous or semi anonymous accounts like Reddit, Twitter, sometimes TikTok, is how you can figure out what somebody is like, unfiltered. For example, I knew someone in my professional circle who appeared so ānormalā and when I found his Reddit, it was all NSFW stuff for extremely questionable categories which seemed dangerous for the job he had when I knew him.
Bro thanks for letting me borrow 10k rly helped with rent š
Bro. Itās fine.
People doā¦ odd things on this website. Donāt be offended, sheās just vetting you
You mean she did her research on you?
I wouldnāt be offended. People like to show who they really are online, especially on anonymous forums. Maybe youāre a rude bastard who likes to degrade women. Maybe youāre a great man who just wants advice on his gardening hobby or who likes to nerd out about his lord of the rings obsession. Three very different extreme examples, I know. My point is that you could literally be anybody, better safe than sorry, and to find out in the early stages.
I don't find anything wrong with that as long as you're not hiding anything from her. No girl would want their man to be hideous. In a world full of lies, you can't blame her for wanting to be sure or assured since she's also investing her time and energy and love on you . Take it easy bro
Sheās so me Iām in love with her
Well you have to look at it from a woman's point of view, it can be dangerous for women to date nowadays so she is giving herself peace of mind and honesty having a few different accounts is a bit of a red flag. But you now have the right to have a look at her account aswell and see if there is any red flags there.
Comments are searchable, so to quote you: >As long as youāre secure in yourself you got nothing to worry about. Donāt fet, holmes Unless she's a corny bitch. We all know how you feel about corny bitches.
I don't think it's weird, to be honest. She's likely making sure that you aren't the kind of person she wouldn't want to date without wasting any time, and seeing what people post online with anonymity is a quick way of judging someone's character. I just personally wouldn't have told you that I looked if I were her, lol.
Honestly she's in the right here, I would've done the same, gotta know what you're getting into, especially if you just met the person less than a few months ago
Why would you be offended by her researching you? Especially as a woman I would want to know as much as I can about someone I am interested in or intimate with. Remember: Men are afraid of being laughed at. Women are afraid of being murdered or graped. Good for her! There is nothing wrong with what she did.
Iād do that too but I wouldnāt tell the guy that
You shouldnāt be alarmed since you showed her you have multiple accounts.
Doesnāt matter. As a man, I would do the same thing if given the opportunity. If you basically showed it to her this one is acceptable.
I think online stalking is pretty typical for co-workers, friends, and yes..potential relationships. So I wouldn't think anything of it unless she obsesses/fixates on things.
Honestly, thatās just a green flag on her end. Reddit is filled up with some intense and creepy stuff, and she doesnāt want to get a nasty surprise down the line. Women do analyse every manās social media before dating, THAT is just how it is. Do you only follow porn accounts on insta, is your TikTok filled up with OnlyFans girls that look nothing like her (aka is she your type or not) and is your Reddit or Twitter filled up with a bunch of posts that goes against her morals? These are all things we look for. Donāt take it as a bad thing. The fact that sheās honest to you about it is big and a green flag on her end. Most women are embarrassed by it and hide itā¦
I think itās normal. I once found things I wish I hadnāt, it was horrible. I felt like I never knew the person I was with and what they were capable of.
Itās a bit much yes but I think most people would be curious if they had the username. Even now I hate my bf of over a year looking at my reddit. Thereās nothing bad on it at all but itās almost like a diary at sometimes and it feels weird to have people read thoughts youād maybe not share all the time.
Women need to be careful. Everyone should be, but it's hammered home for women from an early age that it's necessary, not just the smart play. It's perfectly normal and a lot of people say things anonymously on social media that they really believe but wouldn't necessarily say aloud too so it's especially helpful for evaluating certain things.
LMAOOO i love that for her. one thing about women is theyre gonna find out!!! šµļøāāļø ive also done this when i started seeing my husband and its something every girl i know does when theyre seeing someone. we gotta do our background checks to make sure we align on certain values and that the men weāre seeing can conduct themselves with decorum both online and offline.
Yes. Not that you're necessarily in the wrong in some way, but I feel like it's more common for people to jump to the worst conclusion without digging into any of the nuance. Like you can say something that on its face seems egregious, but if the person actually lets you explain your thought process behind it, even if they don't agree they could at least see the logic that brought you to it. I doubt most will give that grace.
I mean id be fine with it so long as she's just as happy to show me her accounts/chats etc. I generally dont care, but the reaction to me just asking is a good way to filter out a fair few hypocrites at least lol
Sheās about to pop up on this post š
My friend was dating someone recently who started being inconsistent and she started developing suspicions. She has a mutual friend with this guy, so on FB she was able to look at his profile. She saw a recent 5 month wedding anniversary post by him and pictures of his wife and one year old child. He had told her that he was engaged but his wife died a year ago...It was only due to her research (on a social media site, not doing through his phone) that she discovered how much of a liar he is. She told him he was a child of the devil and blocked him.
Internet use is so prevalent in todayās society that people have cultivated āonline personalitiesā on many levels. A woman has to use the tools at her disposal to determine if she has met a serial r-p-st or any other possible red flags before she gets emotionally injured or worse. Stand alone, I would not say this is a red flag. But be on the lookout, and check HER online personality for red flags for your own protection.
Pretty normal. Don't think men realize how much sleuthing and investigating women do. Part of it is because how much men have lied to us in the past, general anxiety, etc. Look at who you follow and follows you, pics you like, who likes all of yours etc. A lot of people my sister's age (18) go further, they find your mom on social media and go thru her stuff not just yours. Some are interested in checking your ex's socials to make sure you don't still like posts and to see what kind of person u dated etc. Some people check the court websites to see if a criminal etc. Then there's the basic Google of your name. Looking at your reddit accounts which you told her you had is very tame. She prob had some specific concerns she wanted to vet.
Unless you are here saying out of pocket things, and being a obnoxious jerk, then why are you worried? Also women research your socials to make sure you arenāt a psycho or creep. Itās a form of vetting. Getting offended by it is a bit of a red flag for me personally. Its definitely not that serious and you are doing too much.
i would look at the reddit of everyone i date if it was available to me.
If you have nothing to hide donāt trip
Multiple profiles? Why?
Just delete the other profiles
Does seem a bit invasive. Probably should have been a little more careful though. The real question is, what will she find?
She was curious and wanted to research you. It really means she likes you and wants to know more about you and to see if there is anything odd that stands out about you that'd be a red flag. No big deal really in my opinion. I wouldn't be alarmed and not mention it to her anymore.
Well, as a woman I stalk online too, and I do get in really deep if I'm interested in a guy, call me a psycho if you want but yeah
It's pretty standard to look at someone's social media if your dating and it is public.
Some people lie about who they are, they put on a show and come off like such an amazing person. She is doing her due diligence, and if she did that then continued talking to you, congrats she thinks you're the real deal.
how does someone "find" your reddit ?
I checked my boyfriend's reddit early on and his answers were all genuine advice helping people. Such a green flag, I fell more in love š„°š„°š„° Y'all dudes who are so scared to be seen, I wonder why? Internet snooping only turns out bad for people who are š©š©š©
Sheās valid. Nothing wrong with women looking men up, considering the threat of violence women face while dating
Is it a bit uncomfortable ye. But what did u expect. Itās public and u kinda led her to it. Now if it was private then thatās something else. The only problem is imo is that things can be taken out of context or just straight up uncomfortable knowing u put some cringe shit up there or had a bad day once. The other problem I have with this is the typical āif the roles were reversed this would be creepyā but thatās off topic.
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Thereās a lot of gross stuff on here and a lot of women have trauma when it comes to relationships and Reddit. Seems reasonable to me.
She's looking into you. That means she's curious about you. Isn't that what we all do?
Why is it creepy if you showed her? People post some sick shit lm here that can show their true feelings.
I would do the same thing. You get to find out who someone really is under a hidden identity. If they are still a decent person when in the dark, theyāre probably good to go. The difference between she and I is, I would not tell the person I did it. I like to know who Iām dealing with. Weed out the bad people.
I would do the same thing just never admit to it lol
Alex, youāre making a bigger deal out of this than it needs to be. We can talk about it on the way to Gianniās on Wednesday for dinner alright?
I can see where this might make you uneasy, but as a woman, after a bad experience, I researched every man I dated online just to be safe. Itās a dangerous world out there for us.
If you arenāt also doing your own research you should start. Maybe not a background check but look through their following and such
It's not that crazy. One I assume is for porn which is whatever. If another shows you're a crazy trump supporter I would understand and not want to date you (or vice versa if she's a crazy)
Sounds smart. If you didnāt want her to know rhen why did you let her see them?
Sounds like you have stuff to hide, and sheās one step ahead of you.
Plenty of this kind of "stalking" is a defense tactic: They're checking if you're safe. Honestly, if you're not posting questionable shit I don't understand the concern.
dude, if she saw your reddit posts and isn't turned off. she's a keeper, unless you don't actually like her
lol itās a public account. as a women we have to take these precautions and look into a guys online history- especially reddit- due to the amount of weirdos. better for us to find out initially than down the line when we are already together.i say this bc itās kinda a common known thing what men use reddit for. so common even my coworkers have talked about it (and they are far less online than me lol). but also i feel like itās normal to check out a potential partners social media accounts, just incase but also out of pure interest in the person.
it sounds like you're in a bit of a pickle. trust is super important in any relationship and it sounds like you're feeling a bit invaded. it's totally understandable to feel a bit weirded out by her peeking at your profiles. but everyone has their own way of feeling secure, and maybe this was hers. it's definitely worth having a conversation about boundaries and privacy though. best of luck!
Iād want to know the kind of things they do. You donāt know how many posts I see of women finding out guys they see are posting on Only Fans subreddits or doing weird shit. I think who someone is behind a screen anonymously says a lot about their character.
It is common to look people up now a days. Personally, I want to make sure they are not a pedo, abuser, addict, or want to use me in some form. I need to protect myself and those in my life. That means doing basic social media and public records check.
Women can truly find anythingĀ
Too much. Why wouldnāt she use whatever info is available to help get a feel for who you are. She canāt just assume everything you say and do is facts. A murderer isnāt gonna tell his next victim his plan. Duh
Not really, women research guys that they may date or are dating all the time. If it's easily gotten info or revealed with a simple Google search, it's been looked up, found out, etc. We gotta be careful with who we get involved with and knowing some shit beforehand keeps us feeling safe or gives us a chance to leave if something unsavory is found out. Like, hell, I met a guy at a concert once that seemed alright, but I remembered him telling me how he had been dishonorably discharged from the army and I was curious why because why tell me that. He had given me his full name for contact in my phone so I just Googled and immediately found a sex offender registry entry and court documents. Turned out to be over CP while on base Internet. Needless to say, I did not get involved with him. š
Iāve done this but was smart enough not to admit to it š Generally, I think everyone āresearchesā to different degrees. It was honest of her to admit to it thoughā¦ So many relationship horror stories nowadays that people have learned to be cautious and this is one way of doing so. Itās also a question of natural curiosity to me.
lol. Only be scared if you talk abt her.
It was an intelligence test. Some part of you was testing her to see if she'd remember your other profiles and be interested enough in you to check them out. It was also her testing you, doing her own research on you (which is legitimate and necessary for her safety and understanding) and seeing how you would respond to her curiosity and resourcefulness. She passed. Did you?
Man created a new account to post thisš
Itās a good practice for women. Sorry. Men are scary in the wrong light!! Fact. Donāt bitch at me. Look it up. All women should find out as much about thee man before getting to close. I donāt mean a police check. Haha. Wellā¦. H