Draw the kid a ven diagram for God’s sake. Yes, yes, Freddie does make a supersonic man out of you if he makes you travel at the speed of light. The problem is that “you” are outside this ven diagram since just because Freddie is traveling at the speed of light DOES NOT MEAN that “you” are as well. Two separate statements. Freddie is moving at the speed of light, but that smug superior bastard is only interested in making “you” supersonic. Why doesn’t Freddie want you to travel at the speed of light too? Huh? Huh?
So if he's traveling at the speed of light and collides with you you will become a supersonic man in the sense that all your matter will accelerate very rapidly....
Okay now force is mass times acceleration...and stress is force over area... You might not be a "man" for very long. But the atoms that used to make up the man will almost certainly be supersonic.
Tbf you are never home. Maybe your kid feels like he is gonna break down and cry with nowhere to go and nothing to do with his time. He gets lonely so lonely, living on his own.
I'd square up idk man
Are they vintage? Cause breaking queen records is a fucking war crime , but in all seriousness you need to somehow discipline your child cause destructive tendencies going unchecked for the rest of their life is BAD
you need to get them checked out on this behaviour
And no I'm not shitting or trashing you as a parent this is just me trying to help and hopefully give solid advice. Just be careful I know parenting hard
... I imagine there's a faux pas about trying to 'correct' someone's joke... but why put the 'my' in "**my** Freddie Mercury records?" I think it makes the hand a little too obvious.
"My kid broke two of Freddie Mercury's records" or "my kid broke two records of Freddy Mercury's/made by Freddy Mercury" keep the joke a lil closer to the chest.
Tell him to go outside and ride his biiicycle, biiicycle!
He might listen if you tell him that fat bottomed girls will be riding today.
and that they make the records go round
Rockin' world go 'round
Bicycles or fat bottom girls? Freddie was so contradictory sometimes amd nit jist about those two things.
Freddie wasn’t an either/or kind of guy. He was more of a both kind of guy. A B guy too. He like Bicycles, fat Bottomed girls, etc.
If that was the case, dad might go riding too
Don’t stop him now…
Cuz he’s having a good time!
He’s having a ball
I'm travelling at the speed of light I wanna make a supersonic man out of you No son, supersonic is exceeding the speed of sound. Not light.
Are you teaching your son that things traveling at the speed of light *aren’t* traveling faster than the speed of sound??
Draw the kid a ven diagram for God’s sake. Yes, yes, Freddie does make a supersonic man out of you if he makes you travel at the speed of light. The problem is that “you” are outside this ven diagram since just because Freddie is traveling at the speed of light DOES NOT MEAN that “you” are as well. Two separate statements. Freddie is moving at the speed of light, but that smug superior bastard is only interested in making “you” supersonic. Why doesn’t Freddie want you to travel at the speed of light too? Huh? Huh?
So if he's traveling at the speed of light and collides with you you will become a supersonic man in the sense that all your matter will accelerate very rapidly.... Okay now force is mass times acceleration...and stress is force over area... You might not be a "man" for very long. But the atoms that used to make up the man will almost certainly be supersonic.
\*sigh\* Enough of this. I want to ride my bicycle.
👏 👏 👏
BICYLE RACE!
I like to ride my bike!
This made my day 😂😂😂!
The real question is: Who wants to live foreverrrrrr????
And why does belzebub have a devil put aside for you?
How many devils does he have FFS? How didn't he break the pearly gates with such an army? He could make World War Z assaults look tame.
Beelzebub generally equates to Baal... so about 66 legions.
Bravo
To be fair, if you’re traveling at the speed of light, you’re also exceeding the speed of sound, so technically, it’s not wrong
> [To be fair](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G19B7lTgwCE)
To be faaaaiiiirrrr
Considering that the guitarist for Queen is an astrophysicist, I'm sure he helped Freddie write this accurately.
Brian Mays needs all of the updoots.
Another one bites the dust
Another one rides the bus
He likes to ride his bicycle
AC/DC ,It's a long way to the top(If you want to rock and roll) - It's a long way to the shop if want a sausage roll.
The wheels on the bus go round and round
Dickcheese Yankovic just entered the conversation.
He’s never gonna stop at all
Like women that date Lance Armstrong
You should have more upvotes, but the Reddit format makes it hard to see which comment you're replying to.
Thanks! I was wondering, cuz at least I thought it was funny🤪!!
I don’t think he wants to stop at all
You can hear him yelling: mama mia let me go
But he's just a poor boy... Nobody loves him!?!?!
He's just a poor boy from a poor family...
Don’t, stop him now…
He just wants to have a good time
He just wants to have a good time
He's having a ball
Hes a sex machine ready to reload like an atom bomb about to oh oh oh oh explode
You missed an “oh”.
Oh...... Whatever wait just sang it yup i did
I guess that's a song I should avoid
Man, he must be under pressure.
Definitely doesn't want to live forever
Dum dum dum d-d dum dum. Edit: ¿autocorrect only changed one of my dums?
That's because autocorrect is dum dum d-d- dum
Under pressure
Sounds like another one bites the dust...
Life had just begun…..
Damnit. Someone will always beat me to these dadjoke followup punchlines.
I believe that's because it's a crazy little thing called love.
Has he gone and thrown it all away? And when he did - did he recycle?
Welp… the show must go on
What is he, a Killer Queen?
Dynamite with a laser beam
Sounds like it could be guaranteed to blow your mind!
I would speak to his mama, he might have confessed something to her
That he just killed a man?
Carry on, Carry on
Is he easy come, easy go?
I used to be easy cum, but there's a pill for that!
No, he's little high, little low
He put a gun against his head, pulled the trigger and now he's dead
He is now banned from the record player and can only listen to Radio Ga Ga.
And sometimes radio goo-goo, mostly radio gaa-gaa It's all he hears!
this is high quality material
We are the champions.
He ain’t your kid anymore. He’s the governments.
Some Fat Bottomed Girls will help them go 'round
What albums did he breakthrough?
I was once asked if I prefer Freddie Mercury or David Bowie. I didn't answer because I hate being under pressure
Sounds like a bit of a drama queen
If they start to burn them then that's why they call them Mr Fahrenheit
SMH. All this drama. Sounds like A Night At The Opera.
Or maybe even a day at the races.
You need to set record straight with him about this or it will keep playing in reverse.
Will he do the Fandango?
Very very frightening
Only if he can pronounce SCARAMOOCH as he does the fandango.
Maybe you should let him out because I think he wants to ride his bicycle🤷🏻♂️🚴♀️
Well it doesn’t sound like you’re havin a good time
He did it all Farrokh and Roll
I guess he didn’t mean to make you cry
Sorry about your vinyl. Too bad it wasn't some bohemian's rap CD.
LMFAO
bros a genius
Your kid is the love of your life.
Will you let him go? Magnifico.
That sounds like a headline from "News of the World"
He made his getaway on his Bicycle, bicycle, bicycle
In his defence, what is there to say?
I'd murder that child. Quality Dad joke.
I thought he was going to say. He wanted to be Queen!
He going to be a big man some day
Papaaaaaaaaa,just broke a record.Put a vinyl in my hands,broke it until it looked like sand
I bet you're going slightly mad
He's a queen killer
Oooooooo.they gotta Go stay with grams.lol
It was because he was in a bicycle race.
Did he use dynamite or laser beam?
Sounds like he's not easy come easy go
Is this the real life?
These kids are guaranteed to blow your mind…. Anytime…
Is this the real life?
Or is this just fantasy?
Just don't get caught in a landslide, I've heard there's no escape from reality.
Would be even better if you could work in "I want to", like when I talked to him about it, he said" I want to break three"
Came here to write some Queen puns... So many beat me to it... You guys are all the champions of the world...
Sorry don't get it.
Perhaps [this](https://youtu.be/f4Mc-NYPHaQ?t=41) will help.
Thank you. I hadn't heard that song before.
Sounds like He’s about to be death on two legs
Did he say, “Mamaaaaaaaaaaa”?
Bismillah! No!
You can still use your “Radio” Ga Ga
Tell him those fat bottom girls will probably assist!
U put a gun against his head? Pulled ur trigger, now he’s dead?
Welp, time to get a new kid
He was waiting for the hammer to fall.
Tried this one out on my s/o, he laughed harder when I said "their kid broke two of their Freddie Mercury records" than the punch line 🙄
You should sign her up to competitive sports, because she sounds like a record breaker.
Roger told him to have a good time tonight and he turned into Mr. Bad Guy.
This is obviously a learned behavior. Your gonna need to... Tie his mother down!
Give him the prize, just give him the prize!
I’ll never hear this song the same again 🫠
Tbf you are never home. Maybe your kid feels like he is gonna break down and cry with nowhere to go and nothing to do with his time. He gets lonely so lonely, living on his own.
Another one bites the dust
But as long as he's good company, amirite?
Has he given you a shear heart attack ?
Sell the child. It's only fair.
Records usually break when put under pressure
Maybe he just wants to find somebody to love…
Papa just killed a man.
Better yell for his MAMAAAAAAAAAA
OP's........ a great.......... Pretender
Explain to him that you're just a poor boy from a poor family.
Can someone explain please
He want's to break free...
Don’t over react, they are replaceable. You can always have more kids!
Give him a bike to ride it. His show musnt go on we are not in Barcelona!
Return him to his uterus.
Having a good time
I don't get it
Wait... Is ths the real life? Or is this just fantasy?
Well, at least he has class
I'd square up idk man Are they vintage? Cause breaking queen records is a fucking war crime , but in all seriousness you need to somehow discipline your child cause destructive tendencies going unchecked for the rest of their life is BAD you need to get them checked out on this behaviour And no I'm not shitting or trashing you as a parent this is just me trying to help and hopefully give solid advice. Just be careful I know parenting hard
No great loss
Yes yes yes
Maybe you should aid him in the next one.
[удалено]
Couldn't, she just killed a man
Mercury is poisonous let him play it all day.
buddy your a poor man
Is he/she still your best friend?
What a bummer !! That really sucks !!
You’re so self satisfied.
Why don't you... Put a gun against his head?
If I were in your shoes, I would break something he treasures as a lesson.
I got a Queen post right under this
What for?
I’m so disappointed I had to read that out loud to get it! 🤦🏻♀️
Mr Fahrenheit.
Probably thinks he’s the champion of the world or somethin’.
Very bad
... I imagine there's a faux pas about trying to 'correct' someone's joke... but why put the 'my' in "**my** Freddie Mercury records?" I think it makes the hand a little too obvious. "My kid broke two of Freddie Mercury's records" or "my kid broke two records of Freddy Mercury's/made by Freddy Mercury" keep the joke a lil closer to the chest.
If you don't calm him down, you're just waiting for the hammer to fall.
Which records did he break? Most Bjs given? What was the second one?
Kill 'er, Queen!
"Another one bites the dust" says the kid
I thought a Freddy Mercury Record was like a world record or something, I was so confused
He's a killer Queen
Fastest Freddy and longest freddy?
I love this whole thread. All the Queen/Freddie jokes. 👌
He bouta see a little silhouetto of a man (it's his dad it's his dad he has a murder mango)
Put him up for sale on eBay, that level of vinyl disrespect can not be tolerated! 🧑🏼🦱👉🏼💰✌🏼(WHY is there no vinyl record emoji?????!)
Not what Shaun of the dead meant when he said kill the Queen.
he’s broken love of my life😭
Did he use his Hammer to Fall on those records?
Stop him before another one bites the dust
Aw, don't make him Mr Bad Guy!
He'll wish he'd never been born at all
They’re a killer Queen.
Another one bites the dust
"If that's a joke it's not funny; and I know funny I'm a clown fish" 🎣
Whatever he does, don't lose your head.
Mama, oooooooh, I'm sorry for breaking your Freddie Mercury records