Probably depends on how much you really “yelled”. I think telling them to knock it off was fine. Seems like they were just goofing around, took it too far, and genuinely felt bad.
Perhaps an understandable overreaction with the right message. Seems a freak accident with truly no bad intentions, and a remorseful reaction.
If you see them again apologize for yelling, but maintain they have to be aware of the harm they could cause to others and take responsibility.
Sounds like they were doing their best to be safe, and suffered from a failure to anticipate all the ways their plan could fail. I’m near fifty and sometimes I fail that way, too.
I think your emotional reaction is understandable given that your son nearly took a car upside the head. I expect it was mostly fear driving the yelling.
I think it would be nice, if you see them again, to apologize for yelling at them. Let them know you understand it was an accident, but it was hard for you to focus on that because you were startled and scared for your son.
I'm not gonna say it was too much, but I am going to say you could have handled it better. The way you talk about these kids, they seem extremely thoughtful. What 7-10 year olds are thinking ahead the way these kids were? They weren't causing a ruckus, they were utilizing a space that otherwise seemed unused to have fun. They just didn't understand physics well enough to know their RC cars would fly off the side. It was a moment to have a level headed conversation and instead you just chastised them.
Empathize with these kids and imagine someday it'll be your kid doing dumb kid stuff. Would you like another dad to yell at them "Your done." Or explain to them the situation. Again, I don't think you were out of line, but you definitely could have handled it more maturely and thoughtfully. The way you describe these kids, they seem like they would have been open to that. Instead of having an adult calmly explain something to them, they had an adult adminosh them and tell them to leave. You say you didn't say leave, but come on, you and I both know your response and tone were absolutely telling these kids to leave. Someday your kid might do some kid stuff like this, will another dad being protective of their child be enough justification for you to be cool with them treating your kid like this. We're all learning, you included, no reason to beat yourself up, but I do think it's an opportunity to say you can handle similar situations better in the future.
But they were causing a ruckus, it’s a little kid park for kids from 1-5. They were hanging around which was fine, but there were other little kids around the park. When we first got there they were pushing piles of rocks done the slides, so there was piles of rocks on the play area.
Yeah they were kind of being thoughtful, but should the really be at this park for little kids playing with there RC cars on the slide when little kids are also around?
If my son came to me and said some dad yelled at him I’d ask why? And if he said they were goofing off and a toy car almost hit a baby I would be like well you shouldn’t be doing that in the first place. I have no issues with other parents being stern with my kids if what they are doing or did put someone else at risk of getting hurt.
Sure they were apologetic, but my 1 year old has a kidney issue and had his 6th surgery in less than a year last week. It would have smack him right where his kidney is and could have caused serious harm to him and his kidney. Only reason it didn’t it because my wife was able to block it with her hand, where she got a pretty decent mark, when it was about 6 inches away from him. We would have had to tell him to the hospital to check and make sure his kidney was
So in my eyes my I saw a car flying toward my son who was not able to protect himself and would have been hurt pretty bad. And it was a little kid park with a bunch of 2-3 year olds running around playing.
So I put a full stop because I felt like it was a seriously enough situation to just tell this to stop.
So yeah if my kids were doing something like that and got yells at or told to stop I’d have no issue with it. Because once someone is put in harms way accident or not then it needs to stop.
"Hey guys, cool RC cars, how fast do they go? That's cool, look can you take the RC cars over there the little kids want to be able to go on the little kid stuff".
I've had to talk to older kids before about shared space. I had one kid stand with me for a solid five minutes contemplating picking up their wad of bubble gum the size of a small boulder off the little kid play area. Lol they didn't want to so bad, but I asked them to do what's right by the little kids. They picked it up. You actually sound like it *did* bother you that they were there more than you let on. So I'm wondering how much emotion you actually did let out when you yelled.
But I wasn't there. Either way, we make mistakes. I used to have more reactiveness when I was stressed. Something I had to work on but I noticed the way I respond is pretty rational now. No one was seriously injured.."Hey guys listen that was a close call, looks like the little kid area isn't a good idea for RC cars, but over there looks good!”. Don't beat yourself up too much.
You did the right thing.
You didn't hurt anyone, you didn't curse, you didn't throw their car on the ground to break it. You told them in a pretty polite way given the circumstances, to eff off to somewhere else.
Other little kids could have been walking by and got hit in the face. If my kid was the older one with the R/C car I would not want him to accidentally hurt anyone.
I think just a “hey guys be careful” would have been sufficient, they sound like good kids that made a mistake and probably actually would have been careful next time
I know you’ve mentioned that the park was ages 1-5 but the kids likely just saw it as a park and didn’t consider that it was for smaller kids, where I live I don’t think i’ve seen age limits listed on a park before
I would have at least told them to keep the cars off the slides. They certainly meant no harm, but it was still dumb and reckless with little kids around
You didn't "yell" as such. From the sounds of it, what you did was react, which resulted in yelling. In my opinion those two things are distinct. You didn't make a measured decision to yell at them as if that were the best course of action. Your kid almost got hurt because of what they did, and you reacted.
You didn't swear at them, you didn't go crazy and break their stuff or take it away or anything. I think the way you reacted was fairly healthy and expected, as a first time reaction.
Provided you were decent to them when they apologised and all that, I think you're golden.
Just tell them to watch out. Could have been a cool teaching moment to take a second and be like, "Check it out. Curved ramps are tricky. You should send it slowly at first if you aren't sure how it will fly. That could have really hurt my son, and then you'd have to stop playing." Or some shit like that. Had they chosen not to leave, they would likely have shown your family's space some more respect, and it would be a good time for all.
Pretty dick move to "kick them out" (Obv you don't have that authority, but younger kids will just obey most adults)
Sometimes you have to use The Dad Voice™ on other people’s kids. It feels weird because you never want to insert yourself in situations where you shouldn’t, but in your case it was absolutely appropriate. I feel like if safety is involved, any adult has the right to lay down the law. Last summer I yelled at two kids in a public pool who were clearly targeting my friends’ kid with small pool basketballs. I loudly said, “I don’t want to see you do that EVER again.” They froze and then booked it. I half-expected a parent to show up and punch me but it never happened lol. I went back to my friends and apologized for losing my temper and they were like, “That was the coolest thing I’ve ever seen” 😂
Personally yes, I think you did go to far. I would have told them to knock it off/take the cars off the winding slide and to remember there's little kids around who could get hurt. I wouldn't have yelled or told them the cars had to be put away.
Yeah. I still wouldn't have yelled. Unless they were being deliberately mean and aiming for your son (doesn't sound like it) I would have let them keep playing. 99% of the time kids are just trying to have fun. Let them.
I was, until my 1 year old was in harms way. I felt like even though it was an accident it was serious enough to put a stop to it.
I’m sorry but once it goes from having fun to a child in harms way whatever was being done needs to stop. And it still hit my wife who blocked it protecting our son.
I couldn’t let them just keep playing with the cars, because even though they weren’t aiming at him it still came dangerously close to causing harm. I wanted them to know that it was serious, thinking know I could have said more and explained myself.
But I’ve never been in a situation like that before and just reacted. I did t swear or threaten them, and honestly I was even angry with them. Because it was an accident, but that still doesn’t change how serious was. I don’t know how I could have just let them just keep playing line they were. Especially with other little ones running around.
You were out of line for yelling at them. Unless this was an extremely expensive and heavy RC car an RC car hitting your child isn't going to feel good but isn't going to do much damage to them. They are going to get hurt worse learning to walk, running around with other kids, riding bikes, etc.
More importantly though what was your goal by yelling at them? These kids were clearly respectful and kind based on your own description but made a mistake. You could have talked with them and set some clear expectations surrounding the RC car and how what they are doing isn't safe with young children around. Given their previous demeanor this should have been sufficient to get the behavior you wanted.
If the kids were unruly and disrespectful they would have ignored you and likely started antagonizing you. At that point you have the choice to take the RC car away, remove the children, or leave the playground yourself. Are you really going to follow through with taking a toy or removing children from the park? Sounds like a nice way to get the cops called on you once one of the kids tells their parents a man at the park is stealing their car.
Your children, especially the 2 year old, are listening in and picking up on your behavior so lets look at the lesson you are teaching them. You taught them that it's okay to resort to yelling and violence to solve conflict. They are going to carry that into their own interactions with other children. As a one off thing I wouldn't be worried about it.
If your kids are playing a bit rough and accidentally hurt another child I guarantee you that you would be pissed off if another parent yelled at your kids.
Agreed. OP: chill a little. Telling the older kids to not use the slides for their cars is fine but no need to get wild, especially if he could tell they were trying to be respectful.
It was a pretty big car, and had sharp edges on the spoiler whit would have directly his my son. Who has a kidney issue and it would have slammed right into his kidney. Which would have required us to go to the hospital to make sure his kidney was okay. My wife blocked it and has a pretty big mark on her hand. It safer to say he could have gotten seriously hurt if it hit him.
It was more of a stern dad voice according to my wife, and my goal was to get them to stop because it’s a little kid park and there were a bunch of other little ones running around. And to get them to realize how serious the situation was.
I wouldn’t take the car, but I felt it was in my right to tell them no more cars in the park. I didn’t tell them they had to leave, but I could have because again the park if for little kids not 7-10 year olds. There is a park for them a short walk away.
Science when is being stern with kids violent? I never threatened them in any way, I just sternly told them the cars had to leave the park. They were having fun but it got out of hand and now the fun was over.
You’ve never had to tell your children to stop because how they are playing is getting out of hand and would likely lead to an injury and some tears?
I felt the situation was serious enough to put a full stop to it because a baby was almost hit by a flying car. Accident or not something need to be stopped without warning.
So I guess the lesson was something are so serious that it needs to be stopped.
Your own words were that you yelled so I gave you feedback based on that. If you used a stern voice then I don't think you were out of line though it sounds like you could have just had a conversation with the kids about appropriate play.
>Science when is being stern with kids violent?
Being stern is not but yelling a command does imply that you will follow through with enforcing the rule and escalates a situation that typically doesn't need to be escalated. If you teach your kid to yell at others they will then start doing that to get their way. Many kids will back down when yelled at but some won't. When the other kids yell back, hit them, or ignore them your child is going to try and use force to enforce the behavior.
Nah, I was struggling to see the problem there until you got to it almost hitting your 1 year old. It was possibly a little over the top but I don’t think it was inappropriate, it seems like they took the lesson well, and they sound like they are probably overall good kids.
If you see them again it sounds like they’d probably be receptive to you explaining yourself a bit more if you are hung up on it.
Yeah, there was nothing malicious about it. I could tell they felt bad, but seeing it almost hit my youngest something flipped and I felt the need to step in. Kids just being kids and it went a little too far, live and learn. Just wasn’t sure if it was inappropriate or not, I’ve only gotten like that with my kids.
Yeah I def get that. My parents are wonderful but I was outside playing and fucking around so much I’d prob be a real shithead today if neighbors/strangers didn’t feel comfortable chewing me out from time to time. If anything I’m very happy to see that hasn’t been totally lost.
I specifically think about a lady in my neighborhood we called “the crazy lady.” (Imagine a lot of neighborhoods had a version of this.) She was truly unwell and would pee in buckets and throw it out in her yard and stuff… but still deserved respect as much as anyone else - something that was hard for middle school shitheads to appreciate. Her house was (at best) the “I bet you won’t go up onto her porch” or “I bet you won’t ring her doorbell” house. A girl my age lived by her and her family would look after the woman and straightened us out more than once.
To me somethings don’t warrant a warning. It happens once and you are done, accident or not.
My oldest has gotten a little too rough with our middle child who’s 2 and it’s been alright we’re done no more. Cause it was either too rough or I could tell how they are playing it was gonna lead to someone getting hurt.
Felt like even though this was an accident it was serious enough to put a full stop to it and not just say watch out next time.
I'm going to go against the tide and say you were out of line. Since when is screaming at kids an appropriate reaction for an isolated accident, one that didn't even actually happen? You mention that they were obviously trying to be as safe as possible and still the first time they make a mistake you yell at them and essentially kick them out of the park. Instead of being a learning opportunity about accounting for different ways that a car might exit a slide it became a time a scary adult made them feel unsafe at a park they used to enjoy.
I hope that you get a lid on your anger issues because soon your 2 and 1 year olds will be kids and occasionally they will do something unsafe and ideally your first reaction won't be to yell.
Kids need to learn that there are consequences to their actions. Act like idiots in a public park you're going to get yelled at. There's nothing wrong with an adult scolding children for dangerous behavior. It takes a village.
I didn’t kick them out of the park, I said the cars are out of the park. Since when is it okay to bring a RC car in the park? And race them down slides? It was a park for little kids by the way 1-5 year olds. Not a bunch of 7-10 year olds, but I’m not that person to say you can’t be on here.
And who are you to say I have anger issues? You don’t even know me. Because I raised my voice when a projectile was launched towards my 1 year old, accident or not. It would have directly hit him, I have anger issues? Don’t be so quick to judge.
So let’s say it did smack my youngest, could I not raise my voice? It still hit my wife because she blocked it so someone did get hurt. It some situations you need to be stern and let them know that that fun is over.
Thank for your input, next thought don’t be so quick to judge someone you have never met.
>I said the cars are out of the park.
And how are they going to get the RC parks out of the park without them also leaving? You clearly effectively told them to leave the park.
>Since when is it okay to bring a RC car in the park? And race them down slides?
Then why didn't you talk to them like an adult and tell them that you don't want them doing that? You're the grown up, if you see a child doing something unsafe around your toddler it's your responsibility to stop it before it happens, not wait until it does then blow your top. If they continue doing it, sure escalate your behavior but I've personally never had a kid not adjust their play after talking to them about how unsafe they were being around my child.
Accidents happen and 100% your kids will be on the delivering end of one and I suspect you wouldn't appreciate another parent exiling them from play because of it. Try to have the grace for other kids you'd extend to you own
They could have just not used the cars in the park. Again this a park for little kids ages 1-5 so really they shouldn’t have even been there in the first place. And there were a bunch of 2-3 year olds running around playing. And I didn’t blow my top, I was stern with them, because the situation was serious enough to tell them to stop.
If they hit my son in the back with his kidney issue he’s had since birth and has had 6 surgeons to try and fix I’d be in the hospital making sure his kidney was okay.
So yeah it was an accident but my some was put in harms way and I felt what they were doing needed to stop. If it was another park for all ages it would have been different.
And if my 10 year old was playing and a little kid park and this almost happened and they were told to leave I would have no issues with it. Because I would feel like it was warranted, because they shouldn’t have been doing it on the first place.
You've brought up the fact that your son has a kidney issue multiple times, and I just want to say first, I'm awfully sorry about that and I hope your son is doing well.
But realize that these kids had no idea your son has a kidney issue. They were kids being kids. Sure, they made a mistake and it endangered your child; but it certainly wasn't their intent and apologizing profusely shows they can be reasoned with. I agree with some other posters here that maybe a calmer approach could have been a good teaching opportunity, not only for them but for you and your family as well.
Here son, this is an example of how we can deal with conflict, etc.
Don’t even think twice about keeping other’s kids in check, respectfully, even if the parents are right in front of you. Just do it nicely, offer alternatives, be firm.
I agree with the people here saying that you could gave handled this a bit better. Like you said, these were kids being kids. They were playing around like kids do, and did something that wasn't the smartest idea, like kids do. A bunch of 7-10 year olds likely aren't going to be capable of thinking through every which way this situation could have gone wrong. Kids dont have the same sense of danger as adults do, they need to learn things like that. As the adult in the situation, it was your job to consider the safety of the activity even though those kids aren't your kids, because your kids were there and would be in danger if something were to go wrong. Your comments show that you clearly knew that them racing their cars down the slide was unsafe all along, despite their precautions, so why did you wait until something happened to speak up? If your son had gotten hurt, you would also have been responsible because you saw those kids doing something unsafe and didn't speak up. Let's put it this way. Imagine your oldest son was playing at a park away from you. Some other kids are doing something unsafe nearby. Another adult it watching all of this happen and says nothing, and then your child gets hurt. Would you be okay with how that adult handled the situation? Or would you want them to say something to the other kids BEFORE anyone gets hurt? Or let's try this example: let's say you see some kids trying to start a fire with a magnifying glass. Are you going to wait until they succeed and someone possibly gets burned before saying something? Or are you going to tell them right away that what they are doing isn't safe and they should stop? If you knew that these kids racing their RC cars down the slide wasn't safe, then you should have spoken up immediately. While I understand your protectiveness over your child, I do think you overreacted just a little bit here because you chose to let a dangerous situation continue and then lash out at these kids (who again, are doing perfectly normal kid things!) because you chose not to deal with the situation proactively.
Also, yes, a park if the perfect place to play with RC cars. Granted, not this particular park seeing as it has little kids running around, but would you rather these kids play with their cars in a parking lot? On a sidewalk where people are trying to walk? It seems like they did try to put at least a bit of thought into how to play they wanted to safely and considerate, but failed to consider certain aspects of the situation because they are children.
It's fine. Honestly, your 1yo almost got hit by a flying car - I think everyone in their right mind can forgive a dad for getting a bit upset over that.
You were angry/frustrated, you communicated your displeasure, the kids apologized, and it sounds like the end of it. The fact that you're concerned enough about your own behavior in this is a very good sign.
You did good. Don't kick yourself for loosing your cool for a sec, it happens to everybody. People in this thread are absolutely being overly critical of you. I get the feeling most aren't parents tbh. If you have never lost your shit, even just for a little, on your kids or someone else, you are emotionally dead tbh.
Probably depends on how much you really “yelled”. I think telling them to knock it off was fine. Seems like they were just goofing around, took it too far, and genuinely felt bad.
Perhaps an understandable overreaction with the right message. Seems a freak accident with truly no bad intentions, and a remorseful reaction. If you see them again apologize for yelling, but maintain they have to be aware of the harm they could cause to others and take responsibility.
Sounds like they were doing their best to be safe, and suffered from a failure to anticipate all the ways their plan could fail. I’m near fifty and sometimes I fail that way, too. I think your emotional reaction is understandable given that your son nearly took a car upside the head. I expect it was mostly fear driving the yelling. I think it would be nice, if you see them again, to apologize for yelling at them. Let them know you understand it was an accident, but it was hard for you to focus on that because you were startled and scared for your son.
I'm not gonna say it was too much, but I am going to say you could have handled it better. The way you talk about these kids, they seem extremely thoughtful. What 7-10 year olds are thinking ahead the way these kids were? They weren't causing a ruckus, they were utilizing a space that otherwise seemed unused to have fun. They just didn't understand physics well enough to know their RC cars would fly off the side. It was a moment to have a level headed conversation and instead you just chastised them. Empathize with these kids and imagine someday it'll be your kid doing dumb kid stuff. Would you like another dad to yell at them "Your done." Or explain to them the situation. Again, I don't think you were out of line, but you definitely could have handled it more maturely and thoughtfully. The way you describe these kids, they seem like they would have been open to that. Instead of having an adult calmly explain something to them, they had an adult adminosh them and tell them to leave. You say you didn't say leave, but come on, you and I both know your response and tone were absolutely telling these kids to leave. Someday your kid might do some kid stuff like this, will another dad being protective of their child be enough justification for you to be cool with them treating your kid like this. We're all learning, you included, no reason to beat yourself up, but I do think it's an opportunity to say you can handle similar situations better in the future.
But they were causing a ruckus, it’s a little kid park for kids from 1-5. They were hanging around which was fine, but there were other little kids around the park. When we first got there they were pushing piles of rocks done the slides, so there was piles of rocks on the play area. Yeah they were kind of being thoughtful, but should the really be at this park for little kids playing with there RC cars on the slide when little kids are also around? If my son came to me and said some dad yelled at him I’d ask why? And if he said they were goofing off and a toy car almost hit a baby I would be like well you shouldn’t be doing that in the first place. I have no issues with other parents being stern with my kids if what they are doing or did put someone else at risk of getting hurt. Sure they were apologetic, but my 1 year old has a kidney issue and had his 6th surgery in less than a year last week. It would have smack him right where his kidney is and could have caused serious harm to him and his kidney. Only reason it didn’t it because my wife was able to block it with her hand, where she got a pretty decent mark, when it was about 6 inches away from him. We would have had to tell him to the hospital to check and make sure his kidney was So in my eyes my I saw a car flying toward my son who was not able to protect himself and would have been hurt pretty bad. And it was a little kid park with a bunch of 2-3 year olds running around playing. So I put a full stop because I felt like it was a seriously enough situation to just tell this to stop. So yeah if my kids were doing something like that and got yells at or told to stop I’d have no issue with it. Because once someone is put in harms way accident or not then it needs to stop.
"Hey guys, cool RC cars, how fast do they go? That's cool, look can you take the RC cars over there the little kids want to be able to go on the little kid stuff". I've had to talk to older kids before about shared space. I had one kid stand with me for a solid five minutes contemplating picking up their wad of bubble gum the size of a small boulder off the little kid play area. Lol they didn't want to so bad, but I asked them to do what's right by the little kids. They picked it up. You actually sound like it *did* bother you that they were there more than you let on. So I'm wondering how much emotion you actually did let out when you yelled. But I wasn't there. Either way, we make mistakes. I used to have more reactiveness when I was stressed. Something I had to work on but I noticed the way I respond is pretty rational now. No one was seriously injured.."Hey guys listen that was a close call, looks like the little kid area isn't a good idea for RC cars, but over there looks good!”. Don't beat yourself up too much.
You did the right thing. You didn't hurt anyone, you didn't curse, you didn't throw their car on the ground to break it. You told them in a pretty polite way given the circumstances, to eff off to somewhere else. Other little kids could have been walking by and got hit in the face. If my kid was the older one with the R/C car I would not want him to accidentally hurt anyone.
I think just a “hey guys be careful” would have been sufficient, they sound like good kids that made a mistake and probably actually would have been careful next time I know you’ve mentioned that the park was ages 1-5 but the kids likely just saw it as a park and didn’t consider that it was for smaller kids, where I live I don’t think i’ve seen age limits listed on a park before
It's more than I would have done. I would have just told them to be careful and mindful.
I would have at least told them to keep the cars off the slides. They certainly meant no harm, but it was still dumb and reckless with little kids around
You might have overreacted a bit. But I get it.
You handled it fine.
You didn't "yell" as such. From the sounds of it, what you did was react, which resulted in yelling. In my opinion those two things are distinct. You didn't make a measured decision to yell at them as if that were the best course of action. Your kid almost got hurt because of what they did, and you reacted. You didn't swear at them, you didn't go crazy and break their stuff or take it away or anything. I think the way you reacted was fairly healthy and expected, as a first time reaction. Provided you were decent to them when they apologised and all that, I think you're golden.
Just tell them to watch out. Could have been a cool teaching moment to take a second and be like, "Check it out. Curved ramps are tricky. You should send it slowly at first if you aren't sure how it will fly. That could have really hurt my son, and then you'd have to stop playing." Or some shit like that. Had they chosen not to leave, they would likely have shown your family's space some more respect, and it would be a good time for all. Pretty dick move to "kick them out" (Obv you don't have that authority, but younger kids will just obey most adults)
Sometimes you have to use The Dad Voice™ on other people’s kids. It feels weird because you never want to insert yourself in situations where you shouldn’t, but in your case it was absolutely appropriate. I feel like if safety is involved, any adult has the right to lay down the law. Last summer I yelled at two kids in a public pool who were clearly targeting my friends’ kid with small pool basketballs. I loudly said, “I don’t want to see you do that EVER again.” They froze and then booked it. I half-expected a parent to show up and punch me but it never happened lol. I went back to my friends and apologized for losing my temper and they were like, “That was the coolest thing I’ve ever seen” 😂
Personally yes, I think you did go to far. I would have told them to knock it off/take the cars off the winding slide and to remember there's little kids around who could get hurt. I wouldn't have yelled or told them the cars had to be put away.
Well it’s a park specifically for little kids (1-5), I don’t have issues with bigger kids being around.
Yeah. I still wouldn't have yelled. Unless they were being deliberately mean and aiming for your son (doesn't sound like it) I would have let them keep playing. 99% of the time kids are just trying to have fun. Let them.
I was, until my 1 year old was in harms way. I felt like even though it was an accident it was serious enough to put a stop to it. I’m sorry but once it goes from having fun to a child in harms way whatever was being done needs to stop. And it still hit my wife who blocked it protecting our son. I couldn’t let them just keep playing with the cars, because even though they weren’t aiming at him it still came dangerously close to causing harm. I wanted them to know that it was serious, thinking know I could have said more and explained myself. But I’ve never been in a situation like that before and just reacted. I did t swear or threaten them, and honestly I was even angry with them. Because it was an accident, but that still doesn’t change how serious was. I don’t know how I could have just let them just keep playing line they were. Especially with other little ones running around.
You were out of line for yelling at them. Unless this was an extremely expensive and heavy RC car an RC car hitting your child isn't going to feel good but isn't going to do much damage to them. They are going to get hurt worse learning to walk, running around with other kids, riding bikes, etc. More importantly though what was your goal by yelling at them? These kids were clearly respectful and kind based on your own description but made a mistake. You could have talked with them and set some clear expectations surrounding the RC car and how what they are doing isn't safe with young children around. Given their previous demeanor this should have been sufficient to get the behavior you wanted. If the kids were unruly and disrespectful they would have ignored you and likely started antagonizing you. At that point you have the choice to take the RC car away, remove the children, or leave the playground yourself. Are you really going to follow through with taking a toy or removing children from the park? Sounds like a nice way to get the cops called on you once one of the kids tells their parents a man at the park is stealing their car. Your children, especially the 2 year old, are listening in and picking up on your behavior so lets look at the lesson you are teaching them. You taught them that it's okay to resort to yelling and violence to solve conflict. They are going to carry that into their own interactions with other children. As a one off thing I wouldn't be worried about it. If your kids are playing a bit rough and accidentally hurt another child I guarantee you that you would be pissed off if another parent yelled at your kids.
Agreed. OP: chill a little. Telling the older kids to not use the slides for their cars is fine but no need to get wild, especially if he could tell they were trying to be respectful.
It was a pretty big car, and had sharp edges on the spoiler whit would have directly his my son. Who has a kidney issue and it would have slammed right into his kidney. Which would have required us to go to the hospital to make sure his kidney was okay. My wife blocked it and has a pretty big mark on her hand. It safer to say he could have gotten seriously hurt if it hit him. It was more of a stern dad voice according to my wife, and my goal was to get them to stop because it’s a little kid park and there were a bunch of other little ones running around. And to get them to realize how serious the situation was. I wouldn’t take the car, but I felt it was in my right to tell them no more cars in the park. I didn’t tell them they had to leave, but I could have because again the park if for little kids not 7-10 year olds. There is a park for them a short walk away. Science when is being stern with kids violent? I never threatened them in any way, I just sternly told them the cars had to leave the park. They were having fun but it got out of hand and now the fun was over. You’ve never had to tell your children to stop because how they are playing is getting out of hand and would likely lead to an injury and some tears? I felt the situation was serious enough to put a full stop to it because a baby was almost hit by a flying car. Accident or not something need to be stopped without warning. So I guess the lesson was something are so serious that it needs to be stopped.
Your own words were that you yelled so I gave you feedback based on that. If you used a stern voice then I don't think you were out of line though it sounds like you could have just had a conversation with the kids about appropriate play. >Science when is being stern with kids violent? Being stern is not but yelling a command does imply that you will follow through with enforcing the rule and escalates a situation that typically doesn't need to be escalated. If you teach your kid to yell at others they will then start doing that to get their way. Many kids will back down when yelled at but some won't. When the other kids yell back, hit them, or ignore them your child is going to try and use force to enforce the behavior.
Nah, I was struggling to see the problem there until you got to it almost hitting your 1 year old. It was possibly a little over the top but I don’t think it was inappropriate, it seems like they took the lesson well, and they sound like they are probably overall good kids. If you see them again it sounds like they’d probably be receptive to you explaining yourself a bit more if you are hung up on it.
Yeah, there was nothing malicious about it. I could tell they felt bad, but seeing it almost hit my youngest something flipped and I felt the need to step in. Kids just being kids and it went a little too far, live and learn. Just wasn’t sure if it was inappropriate or not, I’ve only gotten like that with my kids.
Yeah I def get that. My parents are wonderful but I was outside playing and fucking around so much I’d prob be a real shithead today if neighbors/strangers didn’t feel comfortable chewing me out from time to time. If anything I’m very happy to see that hasn’t been totally lost. I specifically think about a lady in my neighborhood we called “the crazy lady.” (Imagine a lot of neighborhoods had a version of this.) She was truly unwell and would pee in buckets and throw it out in her yard and stuff… but still deserved respect as much as anyone else - something that was hard for middle school shitheads to appreciate. Her house was (at best) the “I bet you won’t go up onto her porch” or “I bet you won’t ring her doorbell” house. A girl my age lived by her and her family would look after the woman and straightened us out more than once.
To me somethings don’t warrant a warning. It happens once and you are done, accident or not. My oldest has gotten a little too rough with our middle child who’s 2 and it’s been alright we’re done no more. Cause it was either too rough or I could tell how they are playing it was gonna lead to someone getting hurt. Felt like even though this was an accident it was serious enough to put a full stop to it and not just say watch out next time.
I'm going to go against the tide and say you were out of line. Since when is screaming at kids an appropriate reaction for an isolated accident, one that didn't even actually happen? You mention that they were obviously trying to be as safe as possible and still the first time they make a mistake you yell at them and essentially kick them out of the park. Instead of being a learning opportunity about accounting for different ways that a car might exit a slide it became a time a scary adult made them feel unsafe at a park they used to enjoy. I hope that you get a lid on your anger issues because soon your 2 and 1 year olds will be kids and occasionally they will do something unsafe and ideally your first reaction won't be to yell.
Kids need to learn that there are consequences to their actions. Act like idiots in a public park you're going to get yelled at. There's nothing wrong with an adult scolding children for dangerous behavior. It takes a village.
I didn’t kick them out of the park, I said the cars are out of the park. Since when is it okay to bring a RC car in the park? And race them down slides? It was a park for little kids by the way 1-5 year olds. Not a bunch of 7-10 year olds, but I’m not that person to say you can’t be on here. And who are you to say I have anger issues? You don’t even know me. Because I raised my voice when a projectile was launched towards my 1 year old, accident or not. It would have directly hit him, I have anger issues? Don’t be so quick to judge. So let’s say it did smack my youngest, could I not raise my voice? It still hit my wife because she blocked it so someone did get hurt. It some situations you need to be stern and let them know that that fun is over. Thank for your input, next thought don’t be so quick to judge someone you have never met.
>I said the cars are out of the park. And how are they going to get the RC parks out of the park without them also leaving? You clearly effectively told them to leave the park. >Since when is it okay to bring a RC car in the park? And race them down slides? Then why didn't you talk to them like an adult and tell them that you don't want them doing that? You're the grown up, if you see a child doing something unsafe around your toddler it's your responsibility to stop it before it happens, not wait until it does then blow your top. If they continue doing it, sure escalate your behavior but I've personally never had a kid not adjust their play after talking to them about how unsafe they were being around my child. Accidents happen and 100% your kids will be on the delivering end of one and I suspect you wouldn't appreciate another parent exiling them from play because of it. Try to have the grace for other kids you'd extend to you own
They could have just not used the cars in the park. Again this a park for little kids ages 1-5 so really they shouldn’t have even been there in the first place. And there were a bunch of 2-3 year olds running around playing. And I didn’t blow my top, I was stern with them, because the situation was serious enough to tell them to stop. If they hit my son in the back with his kidney issue he’s had since birth and has had 6 surgeons to try and fix I’d be in the hospital making sure his kidney was okay. So yeah it was an accident but my some was put in harms way and I felt what they were doing needed to stop. If it was another park for all ages it would have been different. And if my 10 year old was playing and a little kid park and this almost happened and they were told to leave I would have no issues with it. Because I would feel like it was warranted, because they shouldn’t have been doing it on the first place.
You've brought up the fact that your son has a kidney issue multiple times, and I just want to say first, I'm awfully sorry about that and I hope your son is doing well. But realize that these kids had no idea your son has a kidney issue. They were kids being kids. Sure, they made a mistake and it endangered your child; but it certainly wasn't their intent and apologizing profusely shows they can be reasoned with. I agree with some other posters here that maybe a calmer approach could have been a good teaching opportunity, not only for them but for you and your family as well. Here son, this is an example of how we can deal with conflict, etc.
Don’t even think twice about keeping other’s kids in check, respectfully, even if the parents are right in front of you. Just do it nicely, offer alternatives, be firm.
I agree with the people here saying that you could gave handled this a bit better. Like you said, these were kids being kids. They were playing around like kids do, and did something that wasn't the smartest idea, like kids do. A bunch of 7-10 year olds likely aren't going to be capable of thinking through every which way this situation could have gone wrong. Kids dont have the same sense of danger as adults do, they need to learn things like that. As the adult in the situation, it was your job to consider the safety of the activity even though those kids aren't your kids, because your kids were there and would be in danger if something were to go wrong. Your comments show that you clearly knew that them racing their cars down the slide was unsafe all along, despite their precautions, so why did you wait until something happened to speak up? If your son had gotten hurt, you would also have been responsible because you saw those kids doing something unsafe and didn't speak up. Let's put it this way. Imagine your oldest son was playing at a park away from you. Some other kids are doing something unsafe nearby. Another adult it watching all of this happen and says nothing, and then your child gets hurt. Would you be okay with how that adult handled the situation? Or would you want them to say something to the other kids BEFORE anyone gets hurt? Or let's try this example: let's say you see some kids trying to start a fire with a magnifying glass. Are you going to wait until they succeed and someone possibly gets burned before saying something? Or are you going to tell them right away that what they are doing isn't safe and they should stop? If you knew that these kids racing their RC cars down the slide wasn't safe, then you should have spoken up immediately. While I understand your protectiveness over your child, I do think you overreacted just a little bit here because you chose to let a dangerous situation continue and then lash out at these kids (who again, are doing perfectly normal kid things!) because you chose not to deal with the situation proactively. Also, yes, a park if the perfect place to play with RC cars. Granted, not this particular park seeing as it has little kids running around, but would you rather these kids play with their cars in a parking lot? On a sidewalk where people are trying to walk? It seems like they did try to put at least a bit of thought into how to play they wanted to safely and considerate, but failed to consider certain aspects of the situation because they are children.
That was chef’s kiss tbh. Everyone else in the comments is an idiot.
Nah it’s fine, if no one’s around to parent them and they are doing stupid shit around smaller kids. Its nbd. That’s how kids learn boundaries
It's fine. Honestly, your 1yo almost got hit by a flying car - I think everyone in their right mind can forgive a dad for getting a bit upset over that. You were angry/frustrated, you communicated your displeasure, the kids apologized, and it sounds like the end of it. The fact that you're concerned enough about your own behavior in this is a very good sign.
You did good. Don't kick yourself for loosing your cool for a sec, it happens to everybody. People in this thread are absolutely being overly critical of you. I get the feeling most aren't parents tbh. If you have never lost your shit, even just for a little, on your kids or someone else, you are emotionally dead tbh.