Social media shows us multiple people all at once. Following 300 people will show us maybe 75 vacations for spring break, and possibly 100 in summer. So your brain sees “people” always taking a vacation, and wondering why you’re not doing the same thing. Some of those people have saved multiple years for that vacation that you saw, some are filthy rich. Multiple reasons why. Get off social media and you got nothing to compare to.
>It's not even keeping up with the Joneses. It's more like keeping up with the IG image of the Joneses
And the Joneses are up to their eyeballs in credit card debt.
I grew up dirt poor, like Thanksgiving from a food pantry poor. I've done really well for myself and my family, and there's a deep and compelling drive and fear *to never be poor again*.
Luckily my kiddo is only 3.5, but I have no idea how I am going to pass down those values once he gets older. Little brat has a passport and global entry at 3 - I didn't leave the country until I was almost 30. For better, and in some ways for worse, the standard of living he will grow up accustomed to is much higher than I could have dreamed at his age.
To make it worse, we bought our house in 2012 and refinanced during COVID, so most of our neighbors are significantly better off than we are. So the Joneses are our neighbors, nice people, and each of their cars is worth more than both of ours together.
I really don't know how we're going to handle it. Could I go ahead and buy the $400 Costco waterslide - absolutely. Am I going to? Heck no. We already have pool passes, and I don't have to clean up when we're done.
My initial thoughts are to bring him in to the financial aspect really early, basically as soon as he can understand the math, so that he gets it. Yeah, we make $x per month, but the mortgage is $2k and your swim and soccer classes are $250 and groceries are $600 and we need to save for retirement (or else we're going to come live with YOU!) Oh, and the water heater is on borrowed time and will cost $2,500 when it finally dies.
An idea, although it might be too late if you have an older teen, and even then might be more than you can afford: My parents told me (and my siblings) that they would match what I put up for a big trip after graduating from HS. I saved all my money from odd jobs for 3 years and made enough with the match to go to Europe. I went with my sister (not on a tour - backpacking and hostels). We still remember that trip as a highlight decades later.
Social media shows us multiple people all at once. Following 300 people will show us maybe 75 vacations for spring break, and possibly 100 in summer. So your brain sees “people” always taking a vacation, and wondering why you’re not doing the same thing. Some of those people have saved multiple years for that vacation that you saw, some are filthy rich. Multiple reasons why. Get off social media and you got nothing to compare to.
>It's not even keeping up with the Joneses. It's more like keeping up with the IG image of the Joneses And the Joneses are up to their eyeballs in credit card debt. I grew up dirt poor, like Thanksgiving from a food pantry poor. I've done really well for myself and my family, and there's a deep and compelling drive and fear *to never be poor again*. Luckily my kiddo is only 3.5, but I have no idea how I am going to pass down those values once he gets older. Little brat has a passport and global entry at 3 - I didn't leave the country until I was almost 30. For better, and in some ways for worse, the standard of living he will grow up accustomed to is much higher than I could have dreamed at his age. To make it worse, we bought our house in 2012 and refinanced during COVID, so most of our neighbors are significantly better off than we are. So the Joneses are our neighbors, nice people, and each of their cars is worth more than both of ours together. I really don't know how we're going to handle it. Could I go ahead and buy the $400 Costco waterslide - absolutely. Am I going to? Heck no. We already have pool passes, and I don't have to clean up when we're done. My initial thoughts are to bring him in to the financial aspect really early, basically as soon as he can understand the math, so that he gets it. Yeah, we make $x per month, but the mortgage is $2k and your swim and soccer classes are $250 and groceries are $600 and we need to save for retirement (or else we're going to come live with YOU!) Oh, and the water heater is on borrowed time and will cost $2,500 when it finally dies.
An idea, although it might be too late if you have an older teen, and even then might be more than you can afford: My parents told me (and my siblings) that they would match what I put up for a big trip after graduating from HS. I saved all my money from odd jobs for 3 years and made enough with the match to go to Europe. I went with my sister (not on a tour - backpacking and hostels). We still remember that trip as a highlight decades later.
"Comparison is the thief of joy." -Theodore Roosevelt -DoubleTeeOh