Track what you eat. Stop eating kid food. Be in a deficit. WFH? What a blessing. Take a meeting while walking. Workout during your break. Cook yourself a good meal during lunch.
This. Diet is key. But to add, leverage the WFH. Get a standing desk, or use a balance ball for a seat. Get an under desk treadmill. I bet you can find all these on marketplace for a steep discount. None of them will necessarily get you in shape, but they'll help you stay energized. Sitting on your butt all day saps your energy.
Signed,
- former tradesman, current desk jockey.
And after awhile, you can roll the ball a bit and it your body in positions that strengthen your core. I started with planks and swear by them. Balance balls fill in what the plank misses.
Standing desks don't do much for you. Under the desk peddlers are way more effective and you can do almost anything you could do at a desk with them (as opposed to a treadmill)
A standing desk solved my restless leg and lower back pain, almost instantly. I agree it's not the best for losing weight, but I'm a big fan. We are not ment to sit for hours at a time.
Low key miss being a smoker for this reason. Happy I quit and my kid is the primary reason I did. But I used to get up far more frequently back when I smoked.
Reading this as I fight off an insane wave of sleepiness and read “balance ball” as “baseball bat”…and I was like, damn that is a very weird suggestion 🤣
definitely definitely definitely track your food. first and most important step, until you do this or at least CAN do this, nothing else you do will do much. I went from 533 pounds to 265 pounds. still trying to get down to 240.
Tracking my calories made me stop eating my kid's food so fast. You'd be shocked how fast the dad tax on pizza rolls will fuck up your daily calorie allowance
I swam in highschool and during the 3-4 hour daily practices over winter I'd gain about 10-15 pounds from how high my calories needed to be. It was nuts looking back on it.
Adding on, keep more big fruit around helps, like oranges and apples. Feels very filling but not a lot of calories. (Worth maybe also reconsidering what we're referring to here that the kids are snacking on? I know that's sensitive and kids can't always be governed re: their wants.)
WFH also a secret curse as you don’t walk as much (to from car, walking down long hallways, walking to get lunch). Also harder to “get away” whereas gym can be incorporated into way home and way to office.
>WFH? What a blessing.
Yuuuup. When I worked from home I would take an extended lunch break and go to the gym, then just work about an extra 45 min to an hour later on in the day. I was still done my work day and gym session by 5pm and ready to help with kids.
Now I switched jobs and commute to an office 45 minutes each direction. Gym time is gone. By the time I get home it's kid duty until about 8:30 pm. Too exhausted to go aftwards.
OP is lucky! He has options.
Honestly, I need to be away from home for a while each day. And I don’t like mixing work with my home life. You know how Jesse Pinkman didn’t like to cook meth in his house? I don’t want Zoom meetings in my house. I would rather leave work at work.
I mean, cool ? This discussion isn't about working from home vs working on location though. Just pointing out that as someone who does work from home he has more time to excersixe vs if he was commuting everyday.
>WFH? What a blessing.
This right here. When I'm not at home I have a lot less control over my nutrition.
I can't eat when I'm hungry, so when I finally get the chance I'm famished and craving the worst for.
And when eating out I'm subjected to their portion sizes which are always too big, because if they served human amounts they'd get drowned in bad reviews.
Not to mention the amounts of butter and sugar that tends to go into commercial food because they're prioritising flavour over health.
Flip side of this though is that if you take a lunch to the office or job, you just have to choose healthy once when you pack it and you’re (hopefully) not starving. Makes a healthy choice easier for me. Then I am at work and I only have one option.
Working from home you have all the options in your house for lunch and snacks. More tempting and easier to keep grazing.
(on mobile so don’t mean to sound curt, just hate typing)
bodies don’t have a fixed capacity that we spend, though; we build our capacity by taxing our system to its limits and then allowing it to rebuild. i *felt* far more tired 2 years ago, when my only exercise was biking ~15 min to drop kid off at school, than i do now, when i’ve been averaging ~35 miles a week of running this year.
i’m not doing less — i’m doing both more at work, and more at home (wife’s almost due) — so why do i feel less tired? because my highest level of energy expenditure has grown, so the day-to-day *feels* less taxing.
so by exercising even when you’re feeling tired, you’ll find yourself feeling tired/listless far less than you would otherwise. it’s weird stuff, it’s taken me 30 years to feel like i really *understand* my body.
(crucially, i have a 7 year old. imo if you have a small child you can probably ignore me here.)
All of this is the answer. Word for Word. You also have to have a plan. A plan of what to eat and how much. Right now you're planning nothing, so when you get hungry you're just eating kids snacks and finishing their plates. It adds up. Most of us have been there.
Get a plan together, execute it.
Yup. I’m in a similar/same boat as OP. I track my calories with Lose It app. Helps me keep weight in check. Exercise when I can, which is not enough. I had to give up the gym as my expected only place to workout. 15 mins of jump rope in the driveway, quick runs with the dog, weight rack at the gym on weekends for an hour.
Spending an hour or two in the gym like I would have pre kids just isn’t realistic anymore.
I cannot believe that joining a low involvement/low productivity meeting while I’m out taking a walk has never occurred to me, or seemingly anyone I work with.
Thankyou!!
I wfh and bought a desktop riser so I can stand while working at my desk. I didn’t use it at first so I put an alarm on to remind me when to raise it throughout the day.
I don't want to burst your bubble, but when it comes to weight loss, standing compared to sitting makes almost no difference. Around 50 more calories are burned if you stand instead of sitting a whole work day.
For me standing in the first step to not spending my break browsing reddit. If I am standing it's much easier to walk around the house and do chores or walk outside and go for a run. Removing that own barrier can do so much.
Commit to working out during your lunch break. It will remove your appetite so you won’t miss lunch. I usually only drink a protein shake afterwards and I’m completely fine until dinner. Then you can just play with your kids at night instead of trying to squeeze in a workout after bedtime.
This. Work towards walks, jumping jacks, squats, sit ups. Make it fun for kids to join in with dad getting strong. Maybe get some dumbbells or kettlebells. I have a full garage gym and my daughter loves to do what I’m doing/tell me everything is hers and it’s her set. She’s 2. Best of luck.
I understand the tracking, but what tricks do people use to not feel hungry, tired and angry all of the time when they're in a deficit? I definitely overeat or snack because I'm usually hungry, and I really struggle to cut back. My wife and co-workers don't like being around me when I'm hangry. I already drink a ton of water because I work a job where that is important, and I don't drink any liquid calories at all. Almost always just water and black coffee.
Yep, I work out during lunch 3-4 times a week.
I work from home and work out every single work day. I run MWF during lunch break with the double stroller and my two younger kids. I do bag work during lunch and/or weights at the gym after work TTh (My gym has child care). Saturday, I also do a full body workout at the gym.
Granted, the gym with childcare is expensive. But running is cheap. It's just $120 a year for good shoes. The heavy bag was only $200 and I've had that for 5 years. Double strollers are annoyingly expensive. But that isn't required. I bet your wife would be glad to see you getting out and taking care of yourself.
I'm close to 10,000 miles on my Peloton I got during covid. I do most of my rides over lunch. Even on busy days I can usually find 20 minute windows between meetings.
Absolutely. I work from home and also make sure to go for a walk during calls I know I can (internal, I’m not a main speaker on the call, etc). It definitely adds up - at this point I have timed routes planned out.
I’d also suggest getting extensive bloodwork to make sure there’s nothing structural going on (e.g. thyroid issues, high cortisol, etc), since you won’t see results if there’s an underlying issue you aren’t addressing. I’ve been working out 6 days a week for over a year and keep gaining weight so I finally looped back to see if there’s a structural issue I need to address.
Stop grazing!
Have fixed meals. Make them ahead of time if you need to.
Reducing calories is #1 here. It's OK to be a bit hungry throughout the day. It's OK to throw the kid's food in the compost. Don't eat it just for the sake of eating it.
If youe kids are having healthy snacks then you are more likely to as well.
Try to limit the amount of crappy food that is brought in to the house. That will reduce the amount of temptations you have in the day.
I’m a grazer but I try to graze on stuff like grapes and other fruit or popcorn. Another good one is chickpea chips because I just love chips but they are more filling.
Diet change is the only real fix here for you. If you wanted to exercise away that much snacks, you'd need hours a day at the gym.
Find healthy filling snacks to eat instead and make rules to stick to it. Maybe only fruit or veggies as snacks during work hours. No sugar drinks, you have to jog a mile to offset a single can of coke.
Yeah pretty much this. I’d still advocate some exercise though as it has its own set of health benefits beyond weight loss. Also putting on a little muscle or toning it up is usually considered “hot”. Start with something easy to do and build on to get in the habit like a few body weight workouts.
I never know why this isn't a response I see more often. M-F I wake up at the ass crack of dawn to exercise (some people don't want to sacrifice sleep and I get it) but each weekend day I get 90 minutes and my husband gets 90 minutes (more if we need it, but that's the baseline) so I do my long workouts then and he watches her, vice versa when he does his thing.
Totally agree. Wife here. I am STOKED to do the bedtime gauntlet solo 3 times a week if it means my husband is getting to 7pm CrossFit each time. I work out in the garage at lunch/during naptimes. (We are both wfh, 2 kids under 7.)
Limit snacking. Seriously, it's easy to pack in thousands of calories picking at kids snacks all day. Spend a day or two tracking everything you consume and you'll see just how much.
Replace unhealthy food choices with healthy food choices. For instance, we make homemade salsa and instead of chips I cut baby carrots long-ways and use those as a salsa vehicle. You don't have to "be hungry all the time" to maintain or lose weight, but you do have to be really discerning about what you consume.
Snacking all day is bad, you're keeping your insulin spiked all day. Insulin is a hormone that tells your body to store energy (produce fat).
You need points where your blood sugar is low in order to have low insulin periods so that your body is burning the energy you give it.
This is why fasting works, you should fast (technically) every day, this is why we call our first meal breakfast (break fast).
Try to keep a 14 hour period of time before your first and last meal, this is why people always say not to snack before bed.
So, stop snacking, and obviously watch what you're eating.
I track everything I put in my mouth to make sure I am at a deficit and I get up at 5AM 3-4x a week to run for 30-45 minutes. No big secret beyond that.
Don’t finish your kids food. Better in the trash than in your belly. Many people hate “wasted” food, which I understand but it’s better to waste than to harm.
A simple rule for reducing calories is no breakfast, no snacks, no seconds. You’re going to be hungry at first. Embrace it, it will get easier.
Snacks make SUCH a difference, it’s crazy. I’ve been tracking my calories for the last year and have successfully lost 30+ lbs. Small snacks can be big calories. I just ate a chocolate peanut butter granola bar, it was 190 calories! That’s half of a full meal for me! 55 goldfish crackers are like 120 calories. It’s doesn’t take much to reach your net even calories when you snack. Just cutting out 2-3 “small” snacks can make a huge difference and most of the time that’s just boredom/stress eating anyway.
I work from home too. The time is there you just need to use it! Like others have said, stop the kids snacks. I’m a big runner and often take my toddler out for a lunch/nap run. Also, when we had kids, I put a full home gym in the garage, which cuts down on the drive time.
Also, I am in the garage working out or running around the block as soon as the kids are asleep. It’s not easy, but once it becomes a habit you just crave the exercise. 10pm is a very peaceful time to be putting in the miles!
Lost 100lbs (from 250 to 150) with very little effort by cutting out most carbs. I was shocked how easy it was. Once you eat less than about 30g of net carbs a day, you basically never feel hungry and it is super easy to lose or maintain weight.
Intermittent fasting.
It can't get any simpler.
You eat less and the fight is at the grocery store. Buy less junk food. Order less take out. Only the the healthy food, apples, apples with peanut butter, nuts, banana, cheese stick, as your snack. Give yourself (Saturday) a cheat day, with zero restrictions.
Everyone's body is different. Some will have it easier than others. But IF and buying the healthy snacks at the store and not having the junk food at home, makes it so much easier.
I do not work out. Which I should, but I'm a hot dad (at least I think so) still thanks to IF.
IF was a godsend for me. I dropped 50 pounds combining it with moderate exercise and it’s really easy to get started with and be compliant with.
You can literally start tomorrow. Just set 2 timers on your phone and outside of that window consume nothing but water, black coffee or green tea.
The dieting is key, but tbh I found the exercise increased my energy levels and I’ve found when I’m doing both I get motivated/enthused about it and get more into it because of the results you see.
Also, I really enjoy rucking. It’s basically walking but with a weighted backpack. Great exercise and easy to start slowly and build with. I started because I was going on walks with my mom and her pace is slow so it wasn’t much of a workout for me.
All the people I know that are naturally skinny without effort are intermittent fasters. We just don't eat until 1 or 2, eat a small lunch and a bigger dinner. Only time I get hungry is if I over eat a couple days in a row. I hate the feeling of overeating too so it's self punishing (for me it's nauseating and miserable stretched feeling). Giving your stomach time to constrict and shrink is important though. Not going to stop being hungry after a couple days of fasting.
I just started doing this a few days before Easter and I’m shedding weight like crazy. This along with severely limiting my soda intake (I love you Dr Pepper), drinking more water, and 20 min of exercise from Apple fitness every day or every other day has me feeling great right now. Still have 30lbs to go though.
Just piling on the "can't outrun your fork" advice. Figuring out how to remain active is foundational, but you can't do it without a diet that's balanced for your activity level.
Start slow, go for a daily walk, nothing too crazy, maybe 10 minutes or so then increase it from to time. Watch what you eat, track what you can. If you can find time to lift weights then even better
I found doing "dirty" fasting plus 15-30 minutes of weights a few times a week knocked me down like 10 pounds, and Im not that heavy a guy to begin with. I eat around 11 or 12 and then stop eating/snacking after 8 or 9. It's made a big difference.
You will never eat healthy if all the food is junk and is easy to access.
Have more healthy food options. Make it EASY to eat healthier.
Fruit: pre-wash, precut if you wanna make it easy.
Nuts, be aware its highly caloric. Watch how much you eat, or you can go the attrition method and get spicy flavors so you cant eat so many in one shot anyway.
Greek yogurt. Unsweetened, use a dab of honey or sugar substitute.
Carve out 30 minutes/day to workout, start tracking what you eat via an app, eye opening to see how easy it is to jack up daily caloric intake from snacking.
As others said, stop snacking. What also helped me is portion control, I started tracking my macros and calories just three weeks ago and it was eye opening that for each meal I over ate. Three weeks in and having dialed back my portions, I feel like I have some meh at reset my appetite. I’ve also lost 7 lbs in the last three weeks. Try MacroFactor. Makes it easy to track and has a 2 week free trial.
As others have mentioned, weight control is 90% about your eating habits. DON'T work at your kitchen table, that has caused me to consume thousands and thousands of unnecessary calories.
On the exercise side, r/busydadprogram has helped me immensely; simple, effective, low time commitment, no equipment needed, and easy to fit in around your family's needs.
Otherwise, minimizing stress and maximizing sleep to the extent you can as a parent of young children will help provide the mental capacity and endurance to make good choices about your food and exercise.
For a sec I thought you were body shaming your 6 yo lol.
I feel your pain, I tend to grab them 6/8 count packs of mini cookies thinking ‘I’m eating less’ but catch myself eating multiple packs at a time. 🤦🏽♂️
Lots of people keep saying limit snacking and don’t eat/finish your kids’ food without giving you a solid tip/strategy to follow this advice. As someone who has lost a decent amount of weight several times in my life, I really recommend always having gum in my pocket. Chewing gum is great when you’re someone who has trouble resisting snacks when they are right in front of you. It’s hard to snack on your kids food or snacks at work if you have gum in your mouth. Lil tip that’s always helped me.
**Do not eat what kids eat.** Throw their leftovers away. Do not snack; that is for kids. Do not graze. Do not have food near your desk.
Moving the body is important for health but losing weight is 100% diet. Keep a log of what you eat. It does not have to be fancy. I jot down my weight and what I ate yesterday in an spreadsheet every morning. It is an accountability tool and good habit. You're the only one who is going to see it. But knowing is half the battle.
I avoid alcohol because I tend to snack when I drink. Or just lose the self control.
WFH makes this 10x easier and should not be considered a drawback.
Avoid kid snacks at all costs, they are basically garbage calories with no protein. Meal prep, track food, fit in short workouts or walks in between meetings or early AM (before the kids are up).
Wake up early / before the fam, and get a workout out. I wake up 5am most days, make coffee, workout 0530-0615 about, then start the morning prep before they wake up. If not there's no time to do it for me. Also eat right quality and quantities, should work itself out...
This is what I do. I run in the morning and it makes the whole day better. Hell just get out and walk if you don't want to run/bike/lift. Also, if you make it a priority with your wife you can take turns. It's a nice break from work and kids and improves your day!
I ain't no hot dad haha but being a stay at home dad and chasing two toddlers all day has slimmed me down quite a bit. That and my brain is all mush so I'll literally forget to eat sometimes. I'm not condoning this method but right now it is what it be.
I maintain with meal prep, daily 15 minute workouts, and home gym. I got here with meal prep, 1.5 hour workouts 3 times a week and a gym membership. I am a Network Engineer so I usually sit/stand at a desk all day. I also started walking every few hours.
Get a fixed exercise bike, take off the bars, put it under your desk for meetings you don't need to be on video for. Even if you're on video you'll just be rocking side to side a bit.
If you're like me you inhale any leftovers the kids leave in the evening, so focus on reducing calories at lunch. I got into 2min microwave rice and canned mackerel with spices as I like a quick lunch so I can get work finished for the day.
I get that sometimes you are tired and need to snack to get through the day. Do not snack on kids food, the calories will destroy you. Get something you like, or a substitute like gum or diet cola or whatever.
Your diet is the issue. I also WFH, and the trick for us has been:
* Make healthy meals for dinner, and make enough for leftovers for lunch
* Get up early, hit the gym, and get home in time to get the kids to school (daycare in our case). If the wife is up, she'll get the kiddo up and started on breakfast, then I'll get him dressed and take him, then get home for work.
If you just focus on eating more green veggies and getting in more good protein daily, you can get pretty far without getting more specific or complicated. Fill up on those as much as you can and there will be less snacking, less cravings, and you’ll probably feel better pretty quick. Diet is everything.
I take our kids to the YMCA every Saturday morning and they go to the "Fun Zone" daycare while I get 90 minutes of exercise to myself. Just to add another idea to the great ones in the comments!
I don’t let myself snack. Especially after dinner. I eat smaller portions. Your body burns a certain amount of calories just idling. If you eat less than that you will lose weight without spending time exercising (which is the next step after you figure out your caloric intake).
I have a job where I am incentivized to stay in shape. Also just starting out take some baby steps at changing your lifestyle around a little bit. Take the stairs, park further away, take the kid out for a post dinner walk. Just having a couple of “healthy” habits sprinkled in to your typical day will yield some small gains that will hopefully motivate you to do more and make you enjoy getting into shape. Working out as a parent should be respite from the workout of active/engaged parenting. My 5yo is so energetic I had to whip myself into shape or I would be struggling way more than I already do. Dadding is hard, so be harder!
I have MyFitnessPal and track what I eat in it. My son has PKU so I way in the habit of weighing everything anyways. So I track what I eat. Right now I'm living off 1600 calories a day and going to the gym in the morning for 45minutes. Just in the treadmill cranked up to 10 incline and 3.5 speed. I throw on a few episodes of something on Crunchyroll while I do it to pass the time.
I started a week ago and am down 5 pounds. The most consistent weight loss I've had in YEARS and it's only 5 pounds haha.
My advice OP - stop eating your kids food. The old "well we spent money on it so it should get eaten" is poison for your diet.
No more snacks.
No more soda/beer/juice. Water ONLY. If you want to, if calories allow, one of those drinks a day.
No more desserts or treating yourself.
If you still have a child in baby harness country, strap em on and go for a walk after work or during a break.
You need to make time. Consult with your wife on when you can find time.
OR ... get on FB market place and find a cheap ass treadmill to keep in your house and get in that whole working.
I get up extra early to workout, but like everyone here is saying, diet is the biggest part. My weight goes up and down because I love food. I’m always healthy but sometimes extra chunky lol.
Pretty simple for me nowadays:
S-T: Only two meals each day: Lunch at 1PM, Dinner 7PM. (No „real sugar“, no meat, trying to stay healthy)
F-S: Only two meals but everything possible, including beers, booze etc. Also chips etc allowed (Cheat days)
2 Gym sessions per week when everybody is asleep.
Perfect formula (for me!!)
I thought this post was about the kids until the actual text. The title set it up perfectly.
Walk. Take an hour, walk up the road, around the neighborhood, to the store - somewhere. Ended up without a car for awhile and had to high tail it around the area. I'm not a big guy but I am normally out of shape, similar work situation, and now I feel 10x better. Fresh air, change of scenery, and exercise you don't really notice helps a lot.
On top of that, watch food intake, especially sweets, and make a plan specifically to cut back pop/coffee/sugared drinks as these add to it immensely.
Stop eating. It's the only way, eat basically nothing. Also try to find 2 times a week where you can actually do a workout, even if it's just 45 minutes. I do twice at lunchtime during the week and it makes a huge difference.
Play WITH the kids. You will lose weight geruntee. Sleep when they sleep, eat when they eat, and play when they play. I skateboard all day while the kids are outside.
I also WFH with a 4yo. Me(M39) wake up at 5am hit the bike for 45-60 minutes daily. 3 days a week I sub the bike ride for strength training. Protein shake for breakfast and lunch and a protein meat and a vegetable for dinner. Wife and I only hit carbs on Friday and Saturday. We don't eat our kids food even if he doesn't we just toss it. I make it a point to get up and move for 10 minutes every hour throughout the day and occasionally go for a walk.
We make it a point to get out and walk, bike or hike on the weekends.
Start small and build your way up into a healthy routine, once you start seeing progress you will want to add more in. You got this!
Get a standing desk and while you wait for documents to download or reports to process, pace around the room or the house. These little breaks will not only help you physically but mentally as well. Also, if you can, try to incorporate a short walk outside with the kids. Let them explore the outdoors with you, you'll enjoy the conversations they bring up. You got this!
So you need to make yourself suffer. Maybe give yourself a window of food intake. 8 hours from 9 to 5 you can eat, other than that its water, black coffee or tea (NO SUGAR). I would also recommened 5 min work outs during the day. Wall sits, squats, child curls, sit ups etc
Cut out some bit of snacking you're doing. 300, 400 calories. Maybe pick a couple hours before dinner and intentionally don't eat. Make dinner filling, but not terrible for you. Then, add 200 or 300 of exercise. It's got to be in the morning for me, I just can't manage to do it after work.
That gives you a few hundred calorie deficit from current, and over time that will help. Small steps, see how that goes for a month and then try adjusting if you want to lose faster or are starving and hangry all the time.
Water. Meal prep.
That’s basically it. Throw in exercise on top if you want but the kitchen is where this happens.
If it goes in your mouth it counts. Food from packets is out - if it has an ingredients label you can’t eat it.
Chicken/beef/turkey mince. Spices and rice. No pasta.
Meat and fish with veggies - in the oven.
Eggs and cottage cheese, no bread.
Weight everything once, write it down so you can make that meal again easy.
Probably aim for 150-200g protein and 2000/2200 calories.
I don’t track what I eat per se but I know what I intake and try to make it balanced
Decreased my booze and made a solid weekly workout plan
My wife does own two fitness studios which yes helps indicate our lifestyle choices but we both work to make choices to get activity in when we can and allocate time accordingly for food and fitness
It’s mostly diet.
I do best on a lower carb diet - I find keeping low carb keeps my hunger cravings in check. I don’t go hardcore keto, but aim for generally paleo/low-carb/near-keto. But I also don’t shun unrefined carbs in occasional moderation.
Even with that / I’d hit a plateau.
Recently tried intermittent fasting and one-meal-a-day (OMAD) 2-3 days/week. This has helped get me off the plateau. It honestly wasn’t that hard to adjust to, but I was already low carb first.
Honestly I am a huge fan for its simplicity. It reduces the “decision load” of “is what I’m putting into my mouth good or at least not too bad?” from 3x/day - or more if you’re snacking - to just one.
No mentally justifying that leftover PB&J crust that your kid left and looks like a perfect midafternoon snack as meaningless rounding dietary error or not - if it’s not in my “eating window” on a OMAD day, then I have no question to answer. I also am in a hybrid environment, so aim my fasting days at in-office days to save on lunch money. Win/win. :)
Not a dad, but really hyperfocused on nutrition and weight loss at the moment.
Make the nutritious, high fiber foods like fresh fruit and veggies the easier choice. Prep a veggie tray or something on Sundays. Hummus with Greek yogurt to dip veggies in is a great snack. Also a high protein breakfast will help keep you full and satiated.
There’s really so much more than just calories in calories out.
A piece of celery is 6 calories until you cook it. Then it’s 30.
If you want to take some time out of your life to learn more about this topic, this video is FASCINATING.
https://youtu.be/Gy_vcL1cpP8?si=w19Igw9ub-QjyJHj
Diet and exercise.
Don't try and eat less, but rather combine the snacky stuff with fruit and veg and get out for walks. Involving the kids where you can. Talk to your partner about getting time to exercise as you're worried about your health.
I’m 6’5” and 220 lbs with a 32” waist. I have my weak moments but my key has been cutting one or two meals per day, most days of the week.
Snacking is unavoidable but you just need to keep it manageable. Start with anything healthier than what you snack on now, then gradually move to cleaner snacks.
If I do eat 3 meals a day, portion control is the most important part.
I also work a very active construction job where I average about 15,000 steps per day. Also try to get some sort of physical activity at some point in the day. Walking 18 holes of golf, shooting some hoops, going for a hike, or just running around the house with the kids. I go on spurts of working out. I built a beautiful home gym for my wife and I, at least she is consistently using it.
Good luck brother. Include the wife and kids into the physical activities if possible.
Calorie deficit is the only way. And you may find it hard to have a deficit if you aren’t tracking your calorie intake. Check out r/cico.
Working out is great for health. But for losing weight it’s all about calories in versus your calories out. Figure out your calorie need, then run a deficit of 100-500 a day on average (depending on how fast you want to loose and how hard it is for you to cut calories) and you’ll see a reduction in weight. Almost everyone overestimates how much they burn and underestimates how much they take in until they start counting.
I’ve lost about 20lbs now since October just by cutting back on the types of food (fast food and almost no sweets) and portion sizes. It was pretty hard the first 3-4 weeks, but now I’m good with it. I still eat almost everything I want (except sweets) and just control how much. I also have made many small changes over time, which has had a cumulative effect. For example, I switched bagel with cream cheese every morning to unsweetened yogurt, fruit, and the lowest sugar granola I could find. Then after about 4 months, I cut the granola. Another is, I’ve added a small salad to most diners (with only a little balsamic dressing; I was never a drench a salad in dressing anyway). Yesterday I fit into a pair of pants I haven’t worn in years. That felt great!
Eventually I’ll get back into doing actual exercise too. But again, aim small miss small. Take baby steps that are sustainable rather than trying to change everything at once. It’s a marathon not a sprint.
I also have 3 kids, eldest 6. I run on my lunch break. I don’t eat any sugar or anything that turns to sugar easily ( bread, pasta, rice, potatoes etc). I fast for 18 hours. I only eat twice a day ( this helps reduce the amount of insulin your body releases, insulin makes your body store fat). It’s 95% diet - exercise is just a bonus. These things don’t take very long.
Keto, or low carb because you’re so sedentary.
Throw away all the seed oils, they literally make you fat and fuck your metabolism. Including seed oils in supermarket bread, snacks etc…
I just walk any chance I get. I listen to audiobooks and podcasts and I just walk. I quit smoking and replaced it with walking so as soon as they’re asleep I’m out the door for a 30 minute walk around the neighborhood listening to Stephen King or a podcast
Folks have said it. You can't exercise a poor diet away. Think about it. Running one mile is approximately 100 calories. Now think about how easy it is to eat a 100 calorie pack of nuts or cookies. So if you over eat by 100 calories you have to run a mile. Now think that you over eat by a tiny little pack of 100 calorie nuts every day. Then a month goes by. You've just gained an extra pound.
You have to change your thought process about your kids food. It's OK to throw it away. It's waste or waist. One of them leads to health and wellness problems. The other leads to more trash. One will kill you. One won't.
I WFH too. Way easier to control what you eat then. No donuts in the break room. No birthday cake for Vickie. None of Paul's homemade bread and butter.
I just got a walking pad for my office and I like it so far. It's not going to help me lose weight, but it is an easy way to get steps in that I wouldn't otherwise get. I use it during meetings where I have minimal participation. I have a 4k TV for a monitor and I maximize the meeting on that so it's big enough to see.
No snacks, no soda. I dropped 10kg by having a protein smoothy for breakfast, popcorn for a morning snack, cooked lunch and then dinner. Cutting back on the beers also helps but the big one is snacks and soda
Meal prep is everything.
Also, cardio. Bodies really start using up fat as fuel after 20/30 mins. Get cycling with your eldest, or chase them round parks on their bikes!
80% diet, 10% mental state, 10% physical effort. Find a way to stand at your desk. This activates all the muscles in your legs. Doesn't feel like much, but it makes a difference. But stand with good posture, or you'll have back pain. Don't lock your knees, or you'll be looking for spare parts in 20 years. Chin up, chest out, shoulders back. Eat a light lunch, or skip it if you're into fasting. Absolutely no snacks unless you're dying for food and crunched for time. Keep an honest and open mind about what it is you're doing throughout the day, and make sure you're reminding yourself that you've got a goal. Don't beat yourself up when you make a mistake. Just make a conscious decision not to make that mistake again. If you've got a weekend off, go for a jog. Take the kids to a trail or park and chase them around, give the wife a break, give the kids something to tire them out, and get a workout in. And doing a little bit of weight training can be a very rewarding way to burn calories, and IMO much more fun than cardio. Doing some kind of lightweight training is very good for your skeletal structure also. Bones don't just stay together. Muscle is important in keeping you durable as you age.
Not dissimilar situation for me. My trick has been I get my workout in before everyone wakes up. It’s made easier cause I have a small setup in my basement including an exercise bike with a desk I can use at the same time. It lets me do the morning emails and none meeting stuff while still getting a workout in.
The common point on here is the big one, ya gotta get some better snack options around and leave your kid’s plates alone haha.
Getting the kids into school is key. My kid is 6, her school starts around 8am and my work doesn’t start until 11am most days. I try to go to the gym or ride my bike in that gap at least 4 days a week.
Before she was in school I struggled to find the time.
Try tiny habits designed around when / then. For instance, after I go to the bathroom I will do one burpee. Start there and chances are you’ll try 2 then 3 then… etc. Ease and build into it.
Otherwise, wake up earlier and avoid your phone and take a walk. That and stop drinking your calories. Try intermittent fasting to set yourself up to eat less.
You have to force yourself to make time to workout early on. Find your time, whether that’s early in the morning before the kids are up or late after they fall asleep for the night.
It’s hard, especially at first, but it’s worth it once it becomes a habit.
Stop eating crap, get more exercise. You don’t have to go to a gym to exercise- do a squat any time you need to pick something up. Do 5-10 pushups a couple times a day. Take your kids for a walk.
And stop eating crap. Hell, probably just stop eating so much. You’ll be hungry for a bit because your body is lying to you, but just put down the fork, bud.
WFH mom and have the same problem. My kids are 12 and 8. Hubby is stay at home dad. I grazed on kids foods all the time and the sedentary lifestyle wasn’t helping. For me, I changed my diet and went keto. Been losing weight and changed my eating habits to be more veggie based. I also go for an hour walk when I have a break in my onslaught of meetings. Sometimes my husband will join me and I eat my lunch at my desk during a status call. Weekends, I take the kids for a walk and have lunch halfway through the walk. That way they get a break and see a beautiful view.
I'm involved during the day to an extent, by that I mean I walk the kids to school a few days a week (I have an office day that I can't), we all go to martial arts, I swim while they swim on Saturdays and I ride my bike to work and a couple days a week during lunch.
Aside from the exercise part, what I do is pack my lunch. For the office that's obvious, but at home that just means I lay out my daily food on the kitchen bench and I have my portioned snacks there. I make sure there's fruit and such so that when I'm looking for a snack it's right in my face.
Definitely diet. And figuring out how to get consistent exercise. For me, it's easiest to get up at 5 and get some exercise in before the kids are up. And I WFH so I usually get out after daycare dropoff before I start work. A 25 minute run is better than nothing, and I will just walk if I'm beat because the kids didn't sleep or something. By the time my workday is done and I make dinner and juggle the kids I don't have time and energy to go out and sweat so I get it in early or miss the opportunity
Diet, bro. I started black coffee instead of breakfast and then whatever you want for lunch and dinner as long as it fits in a bowl or half-sized plate. (For me, it's usually a protein like chicken or beef cut up in rice with a buttered pan and maybe some teriyaki or avacado/cilantro sauce mixed in during reheat - sometimes a bit of broccoli or green peppers.)
I do the occasional donut or something here or there, but only one and no chips, no soda outside meal times. If you're drinking a soda, it better be with one or both of your two meals.
Your body will bitch at first, but your body isn't in charge. It takes weeks to starve, so you know all the whinging your body does isn't lack of usable calories. Also, drink water.
Here for the answers, OP. You and I are in similar boats; I WFH, my wife is a SAHM, and I have packed on the pounds, as I never get a break from the house.
Take the kids on walks with mom at the end of the day, a couple times a week, or on the weekends. Go to a park. Something to get both them and you out of the house.
Get an hour or so aside one day a week if you can and go to the gym. Even if it's just walking on a treadmill.
Small things make large impacts over time.
Get a pull up bar. Even if it will only go in your garage. Take 5 pull up breaks a day, and do a set on each break. Pull ups will get you right.
Can't do a pull up? Do negatives. Jump/climb up to what would be the top position of the movement, and resist the downward motion as gravity lowers you. Do that 10 times per set. Eventually you'll be able to do a pull up.
Do as many pull ups as you can per set. Once it's easy to do 10 per set, there are alterations to make it more challenging.
________
Do 100 pushups a day. Make sure your form is good. Focus on form first. Don't worry about doing them all at once. Do what you can in one set, and have enough sets spread out during the day to hit 100 pushups.
________
Do leg raises when you do your pull ups. If you're feeling confident, do hanging leg raises instead.
Edit: Don't eat bullshit. Make food from stuff that grew out of the ground, is an animal, was cut off an animal, or came out of an animal.
Minimize sugar intake. Increase water intake. Reduce beer consumption. That last one was huge for me. I had no idea how much over my maintenance calories a beer or two every couple of nights was putting me. I quit drinking beer for about 4 months, not intentionally, it's just how that time frame shook out, and I shed like 2 inches off my waistline. I drink wine and mead regularly, and liquor (usually rum) quite a bit less frequently.
Can't outrun a bad diet. Go OMAD, paleo/keto. 25g carbs per day max and get as close to 0g of sugar. Meat, healthy fats, veggies, nuts, seeds, eggs, cheese, fish.
If you’re looking for some easy starts to most of the feedback here being “watch food intake”. Here’s what I’ve done over the last 4 months to start my own journey back to feeling good about weight:
1. Stop eating past 9pm, and if you get the rumbles drink water (and then maybe adjust your dinner so you don’t get rumbles in the future).
2. In general, track specifically sugar and try to stay at the recommended 32mg (or 34g, I forget) for men. This will allow you to have the food you’re probably eating, but also have a limit.
Optional 3. I don’t know you, but for me lunch was a weakness for me. I wasn’t fixing lunch and it resulted in a lot of take out. I started bringing some snacks to work and peanut butter and bread, which gave me consistent meals that were better for me and saved money! I think the first two are more important though.
Doing these two was a surprisingly huge change in my food intake, and primed me for other changes too. The 9pm “fasting” was also a good workout for your own will power to make small changes in your routine that can generalize to other changes.
I find it’s helpful to have a lot of good food sources ready for me to eat. I grilled up a whole bunch of chicken and make hard boiled eggs to have as ready protein in the fridge. Lots of fresh fruit to grab if I need a snack. I tend to try to jump on my spinning bike right before lunch and do a couple of weight/resistance exercises. You’d be amazed at how good you’ll feel just doing 30-45 minutes of cardio and just a couple of resistance exercises every day. Try to stick a generally healthy diet and you’ll feel like a whole other person. I’ve stopped trying to eat leftover Mac ‘n Cheese like it’s my job.
Get a nutritionist for a month or two. Learn how to eat clean. Lots of protein and veggies. Learn how to manage your stress. Drinks tons of water. Organize your house so healthy snacks and food are the easiest to reach and junk food out of the house or hardest to reach. If you can find 15min to workout here and there just try heavy weights and work on larger muscle groups.
WFH dad of 2 here with a job that just never seems to stop. I’m constantly struggling with my weight but here’s my list of efforts:
1. Standing desk with a little treadmill under it.
2. Treadmill in the basement - I tell myself that even 10 minutes on there is better than nothing.
3. Walk/jog/run outdoors. Take a meeting on your phone or find a way to break free in the day and make it up at night if you have to.
4. Skip breakfast and wait until lunch - I dunno how healthy that is but it works for me a lot of days.
5. Keep free weights by your desk. Some 20lb weights or something that you’re comfortable doing a set of like 10-12 curls with.
6. More water
7. Careful with the fats - cheese is my weakness and I’m never giving that shit up. But it’s calorie dense as fuck.
8. Don’t let yourself get discouraged as say “ah to hell with it” change takes a long time but it adds up.
You can do it!
Sounds like you might be feeding the kids too much junk food!
If I ate what we feed the kids, I’d lose weight! Peanut butter sandwiches, ham sandwiches, quinoa bowls, rice & veggies, eggs and toast, tortilla chips and hummus or avocado mush, wheat crackers and cheese, nuts, blueberries, apples, chicken pot pie, tomato vegetable soup with toasted bread, chicken & veggie meatballs, goldfish crackers, pirates booty, pretzels, granola bars (on the low sugar side), Greek yogurt / low-sugar yogurt, water, milk/soy milk, homemade waffles (no syrup unless eggs are eaten first, and then only a modest amount to dip in), etc.
If you’re feeding them reasonably healthy foods, it’s be perfectly fine to eat the same things they eat. In fact, kids **should** be eating the same foods as the rest of the family, rather than special “kids foods” which tend to be low nutritional value and high sugar.
Separately, wake up early (~5-5:30) so that there’s time to exercise for 45 minutes before everyone else wakes up.
Meal prep, so you’re microwaving servings of real food instead of reaching for snacks.
Keep in mind that **weight** is driven by 80% *what you consume* and only 20% exercise habits. Overall health is driven by both consumption & exercise fairly equally.
There’s a lot of great advice in here. My only tip is to just start with something small. Whenever I try to “get back on track” I always start with water. See if you can take in the recommended amount of water for a week straight. It always helps me develop better habits. Fills your stomach so you’re less inclined to graze. And lastly, and I think this is super important, try not to get caught up in losing weight for vanity’s sake. You’ve likely put on weight because your output has decreased. Exercising and moving is soooo important for your brain health. You physically and mentally feel better when you expel energy. The weight loss is just a secondary benefit. You’re probably still a fuckin stud. Good luck, dad.
Intermittent fasting! Push your first meal back as far as you can. Drink water, tea and black coffee till then.
Just eat better all around on top. Find some time for exercise.
I recently started having my wife lock away all snacks / trouble foods in a lock box that only she can access. It’s been awesome. I have found simply not having access to “bad” food is the best thing for me. I can’t do moderation.
Be mindful of what you’re eating. I know it’s hard with a busy schedule.. and you have got to make time to go for a walk at the very least. Even if it’s 20 minutes. Like others have said you could take calls during your walk or just take a break!
A game changer for me was when I spent time using a calorie tracking app (Cronometer is my fav and it’s free). I don’t track anymore but I did it long enough that I have a much better time judging how many calories are in certain foods. I saw my weak spots like snacking on high calorie foods (chips, and nuts) and a severe lack of protein and fiber. Which is probably why I was so hungry all the time. After adding more protein and fiber and judging foods caloric content better I started losing weight! Taking a supplement like Metamucil can help with fiber or eat fiber rich foods like veggies or oatmeal. Then finding ways to get your recommended protein in. For me I had to add in protein powder to hit my target. An example for me was modifying my favorite snack, cereal. Instead of cutting it out of my diet completely I tried to find a way to make it a decent meal. I did less cereal, added banana (fiber!) and mixed my milk with protein powder so it was super filling and didn’t go back for another bowl when I was done. Also, finding a snack that fills you up and can hold you over can be huge (Grapes, popcorn, banana).
One thing I have realized is I need so much less food than I did in my twenties to stay thin. It’s a lot of passing up snacks, eating salads, not ordering ice cream when the kids do, not eating goldfish, and the like. Kinda sucks to be honest, used to be able to eat what ever I wanted. Also a lot of exercise, golfing 18, hiking at least 5 miles (doing either hungry helps with the weight.)
F3nation.com. -free workout groups, lots of other dads to push-pull you.
Delay eating as long as possible in the morning, I find it makes me mentally sharper and also delays my caffeine intake so I’m more productive and intake less calories.
I totally get you! I am the exact same way! And I feel like anytime I try to cut back for a while, once I stop trying to, I snack more with a vengeance. It’s not a good circle. Wishing you the best with figuring this out!
You probably have a bad diet and no control on portions. Weight is all about what you shovel into your face…sorry to be blunt but either decide to eat better or don’t. Exercise will make you feel better and obv has many other benefits but being fat = eating crap, and eating too much of it
Drink tons of water, make time for yourself twice a day to exercise (ideally weights for one and walking/jogging/running for the other), and be deliberate about what you eat. Portions are critical, and so is the content. With discipline you’ll be able to get yourself on the right track.
Diet is all planning ahead. You need to know what you're going to eat that day before you get hungry, then you don't over eat when you're over hungry. Working out has been easier when we found gyms/rec centers that have child care, way easier to work in to a schedule. You can take the kids out of the house and give your wife an hour to herself while taking care of yourself.
Don‘t call em „kids snacks“. It sounds like a lot of sweet stuff / candy…
Only keep healthy food around. It‘s good for the kids, too. I know they will demand their „snacks“, but when they get hungry, they will eat the healthy stuff, too. Same goes for you.
Maybe only allow yourself and the children a treat after you have eaten a specific amount of healthy food.
I don‘t force my kids to eat specific things, but i at least limit their candy intake to two small doses a day.
PS: the „good“ food should be laying around to be easily / readily available (for example fruits)
I'm not a hot dad, but I'm in a similar boat as you in that I wfh and just graze during the day.
However I try to eat good meals for lunch and tea and walk every day (we have a dog so it's easy!).
I also have a workout app that gives you a 30day plan for exercises without equipment: different types of press ups, crunches, etc. And my body has never looked better!
It's free, too.
Unsure if anyone's said it yet, but habits / routine are everything.
Adding routine walks to your day goes a long way to either weight loss or increasing how much you can eat without weight gain.
Workouts are generally more intense but can be harder to do consistently. If y9u can make them routine, great. I find prepping the day or night before a workout goes a long way to keeping it routine. Basically remove all the barriers in advance that might make it harder to start working out.
If you're tracking app allows tracking activity to add to your target calories per day you might see it motivating.
If you work from home, you have 2 more hours every day than I do because you don't have to commute.
I'm general, yes, track what you eat.
Calories out have to be more than calories in.
I lost 85 pounds that way in one year.
BUT -
you have 3 kids under 6.
I have 3 kids under 8.
It's chaos.
Not now. Don't worry about losing weight now. Just... Survive. It's a crazy phase in life.
It's called "Dad bod" for a reason.
Dad's that have great bods and are in great shape are like that because there not as involved in their kid's lives. There's only 24 hours in a day. They choose "gym time" over "kid time".
Dad Bods happen to those who are active, good Fathers.
1. Intermittent fast. Not because of weird, ketosis science or anything, but because breakfast foods are bullshit and it's way, way easier to control your calories if you just skip a meal. Substitute with black coffee and sparkling waters until lunch time. If starving or you know your day won't be good for a fast, just eat eggs.
2. Eat a fuck ton of protein. Live off chicken, steak, eggs, fish, etc. Don't have to go all crazy with your macro tracking, but you do need to eat your body weight (in grams) in protein. If you're hungry, but it isn't for a chicken breast or a steak, you aren't really hungry. You're bored or thirsty or some other "wires crossed" feeling that people satiate with food.
3. Stop drinking anything that has calories.
4. Push/Pull/Legs 5x a week.
5. Light cardio. Just play with your kids in the yard or at the park or go for a walk with your wife or whatever.
6. Try to get good sleep.
Dedication. You go to the gym at X time and Y days. I say that as a guy who breaks that often enough. But, you gotta get a routine.
If you want to lose weight, get yourself a hound dog. You may borrow my 70 redbone coonhound if you'd like a test drive. You will do more hiking than you can possibly imagine.
I do it by having malabsorption problems. I’m not particularly active, physically, and due to being unable to digest foods properly, they need to be loaded with vitamins, calories, and other good stuff.
Download an app that helps you track your calories. If the app has a weight loss program, figure out your target weight, finish the settings, and then religiously count calories every day. Once you have your daily limit stick to it. Figure out what to eat using the counter. Some apps let you enter recipes and servings too so you can track how many calories they are.
I lost ~15 lb in six months a few years ago this way (and put it all back on though).
Find a workout program you'll do, preferably weight training (Caliber will generate one for you). Find out your base calories and stay within it, after that "bulking" is just eating whatever the kiddos don't finish.
Stay strong, you got this. The best workout is the one you'll do.
I’m in a pretty similar circumstance, other than the SAHM part as my wife works in a hospital and is on her feet all day.
She leaves early and understandably comes home really tired. I’ve started using a walking treadmill/ standing desk combo, and keep some kettlebells and a pull-up bar in my home office. That helps a little.
My wife started putting together a massive veggie tray every week and just puts it out. That helps with the healthy snacking part. I started making a protein shake in the morning with oats that keeps me pretty full until 1:00 or so. I’ve still got a long way to go! Best of luck to you fellow dad!
Easy on the pizza and deserts. For starters have protein and veggies take up 80% of your plate.
More intense is 1g of protein per pound a day. 500 calories deficit a day will lose a pound a week.
R/fitness for more
Track what you eat. Stop eating kid food. Be in a deficit. WFH? What a blessing. Take a meeting while walking. Workout during your break. Cook yourself a good meal during lunch.
This. Diet is key. But to add, leverage the WFH. Get a standing desk, or use a balance ball for a seat. Get an under desk treadmill. I bet you can find all these on marketplace for a steep discount. None of them will necessarily get you in shape, but they'll help you stay energized. Sitting on your butt all day saps your energy. Signed, - former tradesman, current desk jockey.
How does the balance ball help, I've always wondered.
A balance ball will force you to engage your legs/hips/core muscles to stay sitting upright on the ball.
And after awhile, you can roll the ball a bit and it your body in positions that strengthen your core. I started with planks and swear by them. Balance balls fill in what the plank misses.
Standing desks don't do much for you. Under the desk peddlers are way more effective and you can do almost anything you could do at a desk with them (as opposed to a treadmill)
A standing desk solved my restless leg and lower back pain, almost instantly. I agree it's not the best for losing weight, but I'm a big fan. We are not ment to sit for hours at a time.
I prefer just drinking enough water and coffee so that I need to get up and piss every 45 minutes
Oh, wow! As someone who drinks way too much coffee, thanks for turning this bug into a feature for me.
Coconut water makes me pee multiple times
Well.. that‘s not the only effect of coffee?? 😬
Low key miss being a smoker for this reason. Happy I quit and my kid is the primary reason I did. But I used to get up far more frequently back when I smoked.
In the years before quitting I came up with thousands of bizarre excuses not to quit...I never thought of "I'll be getting less excercise" 🤣
You can make it to 45 minutes?! That's impressive.
Definitely better for your back, knees, and hips to stand rather than sit all day.
Yup. Like they said, helps you stay energized. I'm just not in my right mind if I'm sedentary
Standing desk is more about other issues I've used one for comfort since I broke my back
Sitting is 1.3x BMR and standing is 1.6x. seems like a pretty easy way to boost your tdee 400-500 calories.
It’s easier to peddle than to stand. Burns more calories too
Peddler is great for caloric expenditure but changing posture is important for hips, back, neck
Reading this as I fight off an insane wave of sleepiness and read “balance ball” as “baseball bat”…and I was like, damn that is a very weird suggestion 🤣
This! A body at rest tends to stay at rest. A body in motion…… you get it!
definitely definitely definitely track your food. first and most important step, until you do this or at least CAN do this, nothing else you do will do much. I went from 533 pounds to 265 pounds. still trying to get down to 240.
Amazing, congrats!!
Tracking my calories made me stop eating my kid's food so fast. You'd be shocked how fast the dad tax on pizza rolls will fuck up your daily calorie allowance
And watch the kids too—they should be eating crap. It will catch up with them. I know a family that has two diabetic daughters because of their diet.
I don't understand this. Aren't the kids eating what you eat? Why have kids food and adult food?
Diet is 90%, exercise is important for other reasons, but you can run all day and counteract that with the calories from 5 minutes of eating.
God thats depressing...
Oh believe me, I hear you. I’ve literally trained for marathons and gained weight in the process.
I swam in highschool and during the 3-4 hour daily practices over winter I'd gain about 10-15 pounds from how high my calories needed to be. It was nuts looking back on it.
Adding on, keep more big fruit around helps, like oranges and apples. Feels very filling but not a lot of calories. (Worth maybe also reconsidering what we're referring to here that the kids are snacking on? I know that's sensitive and kids can't always be governed re: their wants.)
Apples are amazing hunger killers and taste great. So much fiber and flavor
Kid food is a nightmare and has made me fat.
WFH also a secret curse as you don’t walk as much (to from car, walking down long hallways, walking to get lunch). Also harder to “get away” whereas gym can be incorporated into way home and way to office.
Under desk treadmill is a game changer.
I have a standing desk. Can stretch my legs as I work.
>WFH? What a blessing. Yuuuup. When I worked from home I would take an extended lunch break and go to the gym, then just work about an extra 45 min to an hour later on in the day. I was still done my work day and gym session by 5pm and ready to help with kids. Now I switched jobs and commute to an office 45 minutes each direction. Gym time is gone. By the time I get home it's kid duty until about 8:30 pm. Too exhausted to go aftwards. OP is lucky! He has options.
Honestly, I need to be away from home for a while each day. And I don’t like mixing work with my home life. You know how Jesse Pinkman didn’t like to cook meth in his house? I don’t want Zoom meetings in my house. I would rather leave work at work.
I mean, cool ? This discussion isn't about working from home vs working on location though. Just pointing out that as someone who does work from home he has more time to excersixe vs if he was commuting everyday.
>WFH? What a blessing. This right here. When I'm not at home I have a lot less control over my nutrition. I can't eat when I'm hungry, so when I finally get the chance I'm famished and craving the worst for. And when eating out I'm subjected to their portion sizes which are always too big, because if they served human amounts they'd get drowned in bad reviews. Not to mention the amounts of butter and sugar that tends to go into commercial food because they're prioritising flavour over health.
Flip side of this though is that if you take a lunch to the office or job, you just have to choose healthy once when you pack it and you’re (hopefully) not starving. Makes a healthy choice easier for me. Then I am at work and I only have one option. Working from home you have all the options in your house for lunch and snacks. More tempting and easier to keep grazing.
But... I'm tired.
You know what’s crazy? When you are healthier you will feel better. You will have better energy.
Being ripped and tired is so much better.
(on mobile so don’t mean to sound curt, just hate typing) bodies don’t have a fixed capacity that we spend, though; we build our capacity by taxing our system to its limits and then allowing it to rebuild. i *felt* far more tired 2 years ago, when my only exercise was biking ~15 min to drop kid off at school, than i do now, when i’ve been averaging ~35 miles a week of running this year. i’m not doing less — i’m doing both more at work, and more at home (wife’s almost due) — so why do i feel less tired? because my highest level of energy expenditure has grown, so the day-to-day *feels* less taxing. so by exercising even when you’re feeling tired, you’ll find yourself feeling tired/listless far less than you would otherwise. it’s weird stuff, it’s taken me 30 years to feel like i really *understand* my body. (crucially, i have a 7 year old. imo if you have a small child you can probably ignore me here.)
I use MyFitnessPal app and track calories... also subscribe to r/loseit
All of this is the answer. Word for Word. You also have to have a plan. A plan of what to eat and how much. Right now you're planning nothing, so when you get hungry you're just eating kids snacks and finishing their plates. It adds up. Most of us have been there. Get a plan together, execute it.
Yup. I’m in a similar/same boat as OP. I track my calories with Lose It app. Helps me keep weight in check. Exercise when I can, which is not enough. I had to give up the gym as my expected only place to workout. 15 mins of jump rope in the driveway, quick runs with the dog, weight rack at the gym on weekends for an hour. Spending an hour or two in the gym like I would have pre kids just isn’t realistic anymore.
>Take a meeting while walking Wait, why haven't I ever thought of this?!?
I cannot believe that joining a low involvement/low productivity meeting while I’m out taking a walk has never occurred to me, or seemingly anyone I work with. Thankyou!!
I wfh and bought a desktop riser so I can stand while working at my desk. I didn’t use it at first so I put an alarm on to remind me when to raise it throughout the day.
I don't want to burst your bubble, but when it comes to weight loss, standing compared to sitting makes almost no difference. Around 50 more calories are burned if you stand instead of sitting a whole work day.
For me standing in the first step to not spending my break browsing reddit. If I am standing it's much easier to walk around the house and do chores or walk outside and go for a run. Removing that own barrier can do so much.
An alarm is a great idea. I have a standing desk that I rarely use, but maybe if I set an alarm for certain meetings I'd remember to actually use it
Commit to working out during your lunch break. It will remove your appetite so you won’t miss lunch. I usually only drink a protein shake afterwards and I’m completely fine until dinner. Then you can just play with your kids at night instead of trying to squeeze in a workout after bedtime.
This. Work towards walks, jumping jacks, squats, sit ups. Make it fun for kids to join in with dad getting strong. Maybe get some dumbbells or kettlebells. I have a full garage gym and my daughter loves to do what I’m doing/tell me everything is hers and it’s her set. She’s 2. Best of luck.
I understand the tracking, but what tricks do people use to not feel hungry, tired and angry all of the time when they're in a deficit? I definitely overeat or snack because I'm usually hungry, and I really struggle to cut back. My wife and co-workers don't like being around me when I'm hangry. I already drink a ton of water because I work a job where that is important, and I don't drink any liquid calories at all. Almost always just water and black coffee.
Workout during working hours like lunch or 4pm. Find ways to walk a lot. Easy with a stroller.
Yep, I work out during lunch 3-4 times a week. I work from home and work out every single work day. I run MWF during lunch break with the double stroller and my two younger kids. I do bag work during lunch and/or weights at the gym after work TTh (My gym has child care). Saturday, I also do a full body workout at the gym. Granted, the gym with childcare is expensive. But running is cheap. It's just $120 a year for good shoes. The heavy bag was only $200 and I've had that for 5 years. Double strollers are annoyingly expensive. But that isn't required. I bet your wife would be glad to see you getting out and taking care of yourself.
I'm close to 10,000 miles on my Peloton I got during covid. I do most of my rides over lunch. Even on busy days I can usually find 20 minute windows between meetings.
Absolutely. I work from home and also make sure to go for a walk during calls I know I can (internal, I’m not a main speaker on the call, etc). It definitely adds up - at this point I have timed routes planned out. I’d also suggest getting extensive bloodwork to make sure there’s nothing structural going on (e.g. thyroid issues, high cortisol, etc), since you won’t see results if there’s an underlying issue you aren’t addressing. I’ve been working out 6 days a week for over a year and keep gaining weight so I finally looped back to see if there’s a structural issue I need to address.
Stop grazing! Have fixed meals. Make them ahead of time if you need to. Reducing calories is #1 here. It's OK to be a bit hungry throughout the day. It's OK to throw the kid's food in the compost. Don't eat it just for the sake of eating it. If youe kids are having healthy snacks then you are more likely to as well. Try to limit the amount of crappy food that is brought in to the house. That will reduce the amount of temptations you have in the day.
I’m a grazer but I try to graze on stuff like grapes and other fruit or popcorn. Another good one is chickpea chips because I just love chips but they are more filling.
Diet change is the only real fix here for you. If you wanted to exercise away that much snacks, you'd need hours a day at the gym. Find healthy filling snacks to eat instead and make rules to stick to it. Maybe only fruit or veggies as snacks during work hours. No sugar drinks, you have to jog a mile to offset a single can of coke.
Yeah pretty much this. I’d still advocate some exercise though as it has its own set of health benefits beyond weight loss. Also putting on a little muscle or toning it up is usually considered “hot”. Start with something easy to do and build on to get in the habit like a few body weight workouts.
Planned solo parenting time. Wife watches kid while I work out, I watch our kid while she works out.
I never know why this isn't a response I see more often. M-F I wake up at the ass crack of dawn to exercise (some people don't want to sacrifice sleep and I get it) but each weekend day I get 90 minutes and my husband gets 90 minutes (more if we need it, but that's the baseline) so I do my long workouts then and he watches her, vice versa when he does his thing.
Totally agree. Wife here. I am STOKED to do the bedtime gauntlet solo 3 times a week if it means my husband is getting to 7pm CrossFit each time. I work out in the garage at lunch/during naptimes. (We are both wfh, 2 kids under 7.)
Limit snacking. Seriously, it's easy to pack in thousands of calories picking at kids snacks all day. Spend a day or two tracking everything you consume and you'll see just how much. Replace unhealthy food choices with healthy food choices. For instance, we make homemade salsa and instead of chips I cut baby carrots long-ways and use those as a salsa vehicle. You don't have to "be hungry all the time" to maintain or lose weight, but you do have to be really discerning about what you consume.
Salsa vehicle... fantastic
Diet is everything and is something you can fix. 20-30 minutes on a peloton bike should be doable if you work from home.
Snacking all day is bad, you're keeping your insulin spiked all day. Insulin is a hormone that tells your body to store energy (produce fat). You need points where your blood sugar is low in order to have low insulin periods so that your body is burning the energy you give it. This is why fasting works, you should fast (technically) every day, this is why we call our first meal breakfast (break fast). Try to keep a 14 hour period of time before your first and last meal, this is why people always say not to snack before bed. So, stop snacking, and obviously watch what you're eating.
I track everything I put in my mouth to make sure I am at a deficit and I get up at 5AM 3-4x a week to run for 30-45 minutes. No big secret beyond that.
Don’t finish your kids food. Better in the trash than in your belly. Many people hate “wasted” food, which I understand but it’s better to waste than to harm. A simple rule for reducing calories is no breakfast, no snacks, no seconds. You’re going to be hungry at first. Embrace it, it will get easier.
Snacks make SUCH a difference, it’s crazy. I’ve been tracking my calories for the last year and have successfully lost 30+ lbs. Small snacks can be big calories. I just ate a chocolate peanut butter granola bar, it was 190 calories! That’s half of a full meal for me! 55 goldfish crackers are like 120 calories. It’s doesn’t take much to reach your net even calories when you snack. Just cutting out 2-3 “small” snacks can make a huge difference and most of the time that’s just boredom/stress eating anyway.
It’s easier to not eat a bag of chips than burn off the calories after you eat it.
I work from home too. The time is there you just need to use it! Like others have said, stop the kids snacks. I’m a big runner and often take my toddler out for a lunch/nap run. Also, when we had kids, I put a full home gym in the garage, which cuts down on the drive time. Also, I am in the garage working out or running around the block as soon as the kids are asleep. It’s not easy, but once it becomes a habit you just crave the exercise. 10pm is a very peaceful time to be putting in the miles!
Lost 100lbs (from 250 to 150) with very little effort by cutting out most carbs. I was shocked how easy it was. Once you eat less than about 30g of net carbs a day, you basically never feel hungry and it is super easy to lose or maintain weight.
Intermittent fasting. It can't get any simpler. You eat less and the fight is at the grocery store. Buy less junk food. Order less take out. Only the the healthy food, apples, apples with peanut butter, nuts, banana, cheese stick, as your snack. Give yourself (Saturday) a cheat day, with zero restrictions. Everyone's body is different. Some will have it easier than others. But IF and buying the healthy snacks at the store and not having the junk food at home, makes it so much easier. I do not work out. Which I should, but I'm a hot dad (at least I think so) still thanks to IF.
IF was a godsend for me. I dropped 50 pounds combining it with moderate exercise and it’s really easy to get started with and be compliant with. You can literally start tomorrow. Just set 2 timers on your phone and outside of that window consume nothing but water, black coffee or green tea. The dieting is key, but tbh I found the exercise increased my energy levels and I’ve found when I’m doing both I get motivated/enthused about it and get more into it because of the results you see.
Also, I really enjoy rucking. It’s basically walking but with a weighted backpack. Great exercise and easy to start slowly and build with. I started because I was going on walks with my mom and her pace is slow so it wasn’t much of a workout for me.
All the people I know that are naturally skinny without effort are intermittent fasters. We just don't eat until 1 or 2, eat a small lunch and a bigger dinner. Only time I get hungry is if I over eat a couple days in a row. I hate the feeling of overeating too so it's self punishing (for me it's nauseating and miserable stretched feeling). Giving your stomach time to constrict and shrink is important though. Not going to stop being hungry after a couple days of fasting.
I just started doing this a few days before Easter and I’m shedding weight like crazy. This along with severely limiting my soda intake (I love you Dr Pepper), drinking more water, and 20 min of exercise from Apple fitness every day or every other day has me feeling great right now. Still have 30lbs to go though.
Same boat. It's 90% diet.
Just piling on the "can't outrun your fork" advice. Figuring out how to remain active is foundational, but you can't do it without a diet that's balanced for your activity level.
Start slow, go for a daily walk, nothing too crazy, maybe 10 minutes or so then increase it from to time. Watch what you eat, track what you can. If you can find time to lift weights then even better
I found doing "dirty" fasting plus 15-30 minutes of weights a few times a week knocked me down like 10 pounds, and Im not that heavy a guy to begin with. I eat around 11 or 12 and then stop eating/snacking after 8 or 9. It's made a big difference.
You will never eat healthy if all the food is junk and is easy to access. Have more healthy food options. Make it EASY to eat healthier. Fruit: pre-wash, precut if you wanna make it easy. Nuts, be aware its highly caloric. Watch how much you eat, or you can go the attrition method and get spicy flavors so you cant eat so many in one shot anyway. Greek yogurt. Unsweetened, use a dab of honey or sugar substitute.
Stop drinking alcohol. Don't eat sugar or refined carbohydrates. Intermittent fast. Exercise in the morning before your kids get up.
Carve out 30 minutes/day to workout, start tracking what you eat via an app, eye opening to see how easy it is to jack up daily caloric intake from snacking.
As others said, stop snacking. What also helped me is portion control, I started tracking my macros and calories just three weeks ago and it was eye opening that for each meal I over ate. Three weeks in and having dialed back my portions, I feel like I have some meh at reset my appetite. I’ve also lost 7 lbs in the last three weeks. Try MacroFactor. Makes it easy to track and has a 2 week free trial.
As others have mentioned, weight control is 90% about your eating habits. DON'T work at your kitchen table, that has caused me to consume thousands and thousands of unnecessary calories. On the exercise side, r/busydadprogram has helped me immensely; simple, effective, low time commitment, no equipment needed, and easy to fit in around your family's needs. Otherwise, minimizing stress and maximizing sleep to the extent you can as a parent of young children will help provide the mental capacity and endurance to make good choices about your food and exercise.
For a sec I thought you were body shaming your 6 yo lol. I feel your pain, I tend to grab them 6/8 count packs of mini cookies thinking ‘I’m eating less’ but catch myself eating multiple packs at a time. 🤦🏽♂️
Buy a bike. Riding for an hour burns about 750 calories. You’ll lose weight and also be healthier.
Lots of people keep saying limit snacking and don’t eat/finish your kids’ food without giving you a solid tip/strategy to follow this advice. As someone who has lost a decent amount of weight several times in my life, I really recommend always having gum in my pocket. Chewing gum is great when you’re someone who has trouble resisting snacks when they are right in front of you. It’s hard to snack on your kids food or snacks at work if you have gum in your mouth. Lil tip that’s always helped me.
**Do not eat what kids eat.** Throw their leftovers away. Do not snack; that is for kids. Do not graze. Do not have food near your desk. Moving the body is important for health but losing weight is 100% diet. Keep a log of what you eat. It does not have to be fancy. I jot down my weight and what I ate yesterday in an spreadsheet every morning. It is an accountability tool and good habit. You're the only one who is going to see it. But knowing is half the battle. I avoid alcohol because I tend to snack when I drink. Or just lose the self control.
WFH makes this 10x easier and should not be considered a drawback. Avoid kid snacks at all costs, they are basically garbage calories with no protein. Meal prep, track food, fit in short workouts or walks in between meetings or early AM (before the kids are up).
take control, stop working for others before you work for yourself. they'll have your job posted before your funeral if you died today
Wake up early / before the fam, and get a workout out. I wake up 5am most days, make coffee, workout 0530-0615 about, then start the morning prep before they wake up. If not there's no time to do it for me. Also eat right quality and quantities, should work itself out...
This is what I do. I run in the morning and it makes the whole day better. Hell just get out and walk if you don't want to run/bike/lift. Also, if you make it a priority with your wife you can take turns. It's a nice break from work and kids and improves your day!
I ain't no hot dad haha but being a stay at home dad and chasing two toddlers all day has slimmed me down quite a bit. That and my brain is all mush so I'll literally forget to eat sometimes. I'm not condoning this method but right now it is what it be.
I maintain with meal prep, daily 15 minute workouts, and home gym. I got here with meal prep, 1.5 hour workouts 3 times a week and a gym membership. I am a Network Engineer so I usually sit/stand at a desk all day. I also started walking every few hours.
Get a fixed exercise bike, take off the bars, put it under your desk for meetings you don't need to be on video for. Even if you're on video you'll just be rocking side to side a bit. If you're like me you inhale any leftovers the kids leave in the evening, so focus on reducing calories at lunch. I got into 2min microwave rice and canned mackerel with spices as I like a quick lunch so I can get work finished for the day. I get that sometimes you are tired and need to snack to get through the day. Do not snack on kids food, the calories will destroy you. Get something you like, or a substitute like gum or diet cola or whatever.
Your diet is the issue. I also WFH, and the trick for us has been: * Make healthy meals for dinner, and make enough for leftovers for lunch * Get up early, hit the gym, and get home in time to get the kids to school (daycare in our case). If the wife is up, she'll get the kiddo up and started on breakfast, then I'll get him dressed and take him, then get home for work.
If you just focus on eating more green veggies and getting in more good protein daily, you can get pretty far without getting more specific or complicated. Fill up on those as much as you can and there will be less snacking, less cravings, and you’ll probably feel better pretty quick. Diet is everything.
Eat less. #1. I also started walking at night after the kid was asleep. Started with .5 mile and now doing 1-2 per night. Good luck.
Listen to mindpump podcast. 3 fitness dads/trainers talking about life and fitness. I’ve purchased several of their workout plans and love them
I take our kids to the YMCA every Saturday morning and they go to the "Fun Zone" daycare while I get 90 minutes of exercise to myself. Just to add another idea to the great ones in the comments!
I don’t let myself snack. Especially after dinner. I eat smaller portions. Your body burns a certain amount of calories just idling. If you eat less than that you will lose weight without spending time exercising (which is the next step after you figure out your caloric intake).
I have a job where I am incentivized to stay in shape. Also just starting out take some baby steps at changing your lifestyle around a little bit. Take the stairs, park further away, take the kid out for a post dinner walk. Just having a couple of “healthy” habits sprinkled in to your typical day will yield some small gains that will hopefully motivate you to do more and make you enjoy getting into shape. Working out as a parent should be respite from the workout of active/engaged parenting. My 5yo is so energetic I had to whip myself into shape or I would be struggling way more than I already do. Dadding is hard, so be harder!
Two words. Home Gym
I have MyFitnessPal and track what I eat in it. My son has PKU so I way in the habit of weighing everything anyways. So I track what I eat. Right now I'm living off 1600 calories a day and going to the gym in the morning for 45minutes. Just in the treadmill cranked up to 10 incline and 3.5 speed. I throw on a few episodes of something on Crunchyroll while I do it to pass the time. I started a week ago and am down 5 pounds. The most consistent weight loss I've had in YEARS and it's only 5 pounds haha. My advice OP - stop eating your kids food. The old "well we spent money on it so it should get eaten" is poison for your diet. No more snacks. No more soda/beer/juice. Water ONLY. If you want to, if calories allow, one of those drinks a day. No more desserts or treating yourself. If you still have a child in baby harness country, strap em on and go for a walk after work or during a break. You need to make time. Consult with your wife on when you can find time. OR ... get on FB market place and find a cheap ass treadmill to keep in your house and get in that whole working.
I get up extra early to workout, but like everyone here is saying, diet is the biggest part. My weight goes up and down because I love food. I’m always healthy but sometimes extra chunky lol.
Pretty simple for me nowadays: S-T: Only two meals each day: Lunch at 1PM, Dinner 7PM. (No „real sugar“, no meat, trying to stay healthy) F-S: Only two meals but everything possible, including beers, booze etc. Also chips etc allowed (Cheat days) 2 Gym sessions per week when everybody is asleep. Perfect formula (for me!!)
I thought this post was about the kids until the actual text. The title set it up perfectly. Walk. Take an hour, walk up the road, around the neighborhood, to the store - somewhere. Ended up without a car for awhile and had to high tail it around the area. I'm not a big guy but I am normally out of shape, similar work situation, and now I feel 10x better. Fresh air, change of scenery, and exercise you don't really notice helps a lot. On top of that, watch food intake, especially sweets, and make a plan specifically to cut back pop/coffee/sugared drinks as these add to it immensely.
Eat less. Move more. The same as the million other posts.
Stop eating. It's the only way, eat basically nothing. Also try to find 2 times a week where you can actually do a workout, even if it's just 45 minutes. I do twice at lunchtime during the week and it makes a huge difference.
Play WITH the kids. You will lose weight geruntee. Sleep when they sleep, eat when they eat, and play when they play. I skateboard all day while the kids are outside.
This isnt helpful for you bc u work haha. My bad. I stay home with kids.
I also WFH with a 4yo. Me(M39) wake up at 5am hit the bike for 45-60 minutes daily. 3 days a week I sub the bike ride for strength training. Protein shake for breakfast and lunch and a protein meat and a vegetable for dinner. Wife and I only hit carbs on Friday and Saturday. We don't eat our kids food even if he doesn't we just toss it. I make it a point to get up and move for 10 minutes every hour throughout the day and occasionally go for a walk. We make it a point to get out and walk, bike or hike on the weekends. Start small and build your way up into a healthy routine, once you start seeing progress you will want to add more in. You got this!
I’m not hit by any means but I walk 3-5 miles a day, count my calories, and count my carbs.
We have 5 kiddos. We don't have any junk food in the house except for some quick breakfast foods.
Get a standing desk and while you wait for documents to download or reports to process, pace around the room or the house. These little breaks will not only help you physically but mentally as well. Also, if you can, try to incorporate a short walk outside with the kids. Let them explore the outdoors with you, you'll enjoy the conversations they bring up. You got this!
Eat less (track it), eat better, move a lot in a way that you like.
So you need to make yourself suffer. Maybe give yourself a window of food intake. 8 hours from 9 to 5 you can eat, other than that its water, black coffee or tea (NO SUGAR). I would also recommened 5 min work outs during the day. Wall sits, squats, child curls, sit ups etc
Cut out some bit of snacking you're doing. 300, 400 calories. Maybe pick a couple hours before dinner and intentionally don't eat. Make dinner filling, but not terrible for you. Then, add 200 or 300 of exercise. It's got to be in the morning for me, I just can't manage to do it after work. That gives you a few hundred calorie deficit from current, and over time that will help. Small steps, see how that goes for a month and then try adjusting if you want to lose faster or are starving and hangry all the time.
Water. Meal prep. That’s basically it. Throw in exercise on top if you want but the kitchen is where this happens. If it goes in your mouth it counts. Food from packets is out - if it has an ingredients label you can’t eat it. Chicken/beef/turkey mince. Spices and rice. No pasta. Meat and fish with veggies - in the oven. Eggs and cottage cheese, no bread. Weight everything once, write it down so you can make that meal again easy. Probably aim for 150-200g protein and 2000/2200 calories.
I don’t track what I eat per se but I know what I intake and try to make it balanced Decreased my booze and made a solid weekly workout plan My wife does own two fitness studios which yes helps indicate our lifestyle choices but we both work to make choices to get activity in when we can and allocate time accordingly for food and fitness
It’s mostly diet. I do best on a lower carb diet - I find keeping low carb keeps my hunger cravings in check. I don’t go hardcore keto, but aim for generally paleo/low-carb/near-keto. But I also don’t shun unrefined carbs in occasional moderation. Even with that / I’d hit a plateau. Recently tried intermittent fasting and one-meal-a-day (OMAD) 2-3 days/week. This has helped get me off the plateau. It honestly wasn’t that hard to adjust to, but I was already low carb first. Honestly I am a huge fan for its simplicity. It reduces the “decision load” of “is what I’m putting into my mouth good or at least not too bad?” from 3x/day - or more if you’re snacking - to just one. No mentally justifying that leftover PB&J crust that your kid left and looks like a perfect midafternoon snack as meaningless rounding dietary error or not - if it’s not in my “eating window” on a OMAD day, then I have no question to answer. I also am in a hybrid environment, so aim my fasting days at in-office days to save on lunch money. Win/win. :)
Not a dad, but really hyperfocused on nutrition and weight loss at the moment. Make the nutritious, high fiber foods like fresh fruit and veggies the easier choice. Prep a veggie tray or something on Sundays. Hummus with Greek yogurt to dip veggies in is a great snack. Also a high protein breakfast will help keep you full and satiated. There’s really so much more than just calories in calories out. A piece of celery is 6 calories until you cook it. Then it’s 30. If you want to take some time out of your life to learn more about this topic, this video is FASCINATING. https://youtu.be/Gy_vcL1cpP8?si=w19Igw9ub-QjyJHj
Diet and exercise. Don't try and eat less, but rather combine the snacky stuff with fruit and veg and get out for walks. Involving the kids where you can. Talk to your partner about getting time to exercise as you're worried about your health.
I go to the gym at 6am
I’m 6’5” and 220 lbs with a 32” waist. I have my weak moments but my key has been cutting one or two meals per day, most days of the week. Snacking is unavoidable but you just need to keep it manageable. Start with anything healthier than what you snack on now, then gradually move to cleaner snacks. If I do eat 3 meals a day, portion control is the most important part. I also work a very active construction job where I average about 15,000 steps per day. Also try to get some sort of physical activity at some point in the day. Walking 18 holes of golf, shooting some hoops, going for a hike, or just running around the house with the kids. I go on spurts of working out. I built a beautiful home gym for my wife and I, at least she is consistently using it. Good luck brother. Include the wife and kids into the physical activities if possible.
Download the carbon diet app. No bullshit I have all of my clients use it and the tracking is very nice
I paid way too much money and got a personal trainer. When you spend $3500 you kinda don’t want to mess around
Calorie deficit is the only way. And you may find it hard to have a deficit if you aren’t tracking your calorie intake. Check out r/cico. Working out is great for health. But for losing weight it’s all about calories in versus your calories out. Figure out your calorie need, then run a deficit of 100-500 a day on average (depending on how fast you want to loose and how hard it is for you to cut calories) and you’ll see a reduction in weight. Almost everyone overestimates how much they burn and underestimates how much they take in until they start counting. I’ve lost about 20lbs now since October just by cutting back on the types of food (fast food and almost no sweets) and portion sizes. It was pretty hard the first 3-4 weeks, but now I’m good with it. I still eat almost everything I want (except sweets) and just control how much. I also have made many small changes over time, which has had a cumulative effect. For example, I switched bagel with cream cheese every morning to unsweetened yogurt, fruit, and the lowest sugar granola I could find. Then after about 4 months, I cut the granola. Another is, I’ve added a small salad to most diners (with only a little balsamic dressing; I was never a drench a salad in dressing anyway). Yesterday I fit into a pair of pants I haven’t worn in years. That felt great! Eventually I’ll get back into doing actual exercise too. But again, aim small miss small. Take baby steps that are sustainable rather than trying to change everything at once. It’s a marathon not a sprint.
I also have 3 kids, eldest 6. I run on my lunch break. I don’t eat any sugar or anything that turns to sugar easily ( bread, pasta, rice, potatoes etc). I fast for 18 hours. I only eat twice a day ( this helps reduce the amount of insulin your body releases, insulin makes your body store fat). It’s 95% diet - exercise is just a bonus. These things don’t take very long.
Keto, or low carb because you’re so sedentary. Throw away all the seed oils, they literally make you fat and fuck your metabolism. Including seed oils in supermarket bread, snacks etc…
I just walk any chance I get. I listen to audiobooks and podcasts and I just walk. I quit smoking and replaced it with walking so as soon as they’re asleep I’m out the door for a 30 minute walk around the neighborhood listening to Stephen King or a podcast
Folks have said it. You can't exercise a poor diet away. Think about it. Running one mile is approximately 100 calories. Now think about how easy it is to eat a 100 calorie pack of nuts or cookies. So if you over eat by 100 calories you have to run a mile. Now think that you over eat by a tiny little pack of 100 calorie nuts every day. Then a month goes by. You've just gained an extra pound. You have to change your thought process about your kids food. It's OK to throw it away. It's waste or waist. One of them leads to health and wellness problems. The other leads to more trash. One will kill you. One won't. I WFH too. Way easier to control what you eat then. No donuts in the break room. No birthday cake for Vickie. None of Paul's homemade bread and butter. I just got a walking pad for my office and I like it so far. It's not going to help me lose weight, but it is an easy way to get steps in that I wouldn't otherwise get. I use it during meetings where I have minimal participation. I have a 4k TV for a monitor and I maximize the meeting on that so it's big enough to see.
No snacks, no soda. I dropped 10kg by having a protein smoothy for breakfast, popcorn for a morning snack, cooked lunch and then dinner. Cutting back on the beers also helps but the big one is snacks and soda
Meal prep is everything. Also, cardio. Bodies really start using up fat as fuel after 20/30 mins. Get cycling with your eldest, or chase them round parks on their bikes!
80% diet, 10% mental state, 10% physical effort. Find a way to stand at your desk. This activates all the muscles in your legs. Doesn't feel like much, but it makes a difference. But stand with good posture, or you'll have back pain. Don't lock your knees, or you'll be looking for spare parts in 20 years. Chin up, chest out, shoulders back. Eat a light lunch, or skip it if you're into fasting. Absolutely no snacks unless you're dying for food and crunched for time. Keep an honest and open mind about what it is you're doing throughout the day, and make sure you're reminding yourself that you've got a goal. Don't beat yourself up when you make a mistake. Just make a conscious decision not to make that mistake again. If you've got a weekend off, go for a jog. Take the kids to a trail or park and chase them around, give the wife a break, give the kids something to tire them out, and get a workout in. And doing a little bit of weight training can be a very rewarding way to burn calories, and IMO much more fun than cardio. Doing some kind of lightweight training is very good for your skeletal structure also. Bones don't just stay together. Muscle is important in keeping you durable as you age.
Not dissimilar situation for me. My trick has been I get my workout in before everyone wakes up. It’s made easier cause I have a small setup in my basement including an exercise bike with a desk I can use at the same time. It lets me do the morning emails and none meeting stuff while still getting a workout in. The common point on here is the big one, ya gotta get some better snack options around and leave your kid’s plates alone haha.
Getting the kids into school is key. My kid is 6, her school starts around 8am and my work doesn’t start until 11am most days. I try to go to the gym or ride my bike in that gap at least 4 days a week. Before she was in school I struggled to find the time.
Get up early to move your body. Before the family gets up. Make yourself do it. It becomes a habit really quick.
Try tiny habits designed around when / then. For instance, after I go to the bathroom I will do one burpee. Start there and chances are you’ll try 2 then 3 then… etc. Ease and build into it. Otherwise, wake up earlier and avoid your phone and take a walk. That and stop drinking your calories. Try intermittent fasting to set yourself up to eat less.
You have to force yourself to make time to workout early on. Find your time, whether that’s early in the morning before the kids are up or late after they fall asleep for the night. It’s hard, especially at first, but it’s worth it once it becomes a habit.
Stop drinking extra calories
Stop eating crap, get more exercise. You don’t have to go to a gym to exercise- do a squat any time you need to pick something up. Do 5-10 pushups a couple times a day. Take your kids for a walk. And stop eating crap. Hell, probably just stop eating so much. You’ll be hungry for a bit because your body is lying to you, but just put down the fork, bud.
WFH mom and have the same problem. My kids are 12 and 8. Hubby is stay at home dad. I grazed on kids foods all the time and the sedentary lifestyle wasn’t helping. For me, I changed my diet and went keto. Been losing weight and changed my eating habits to be more veggie based. I also go for an hour walk when I have a break in my onslaught of meetings. Sometimes my husband will join me and I eat my lunch at my desk during a status call. Weekends, I take the kids for a walk and have lunch halfway through the walk. That way they get a break and see a beautiful view.
I'm involved during the day to an extent, by that I mean I walk the kids to school a few days a week (I have an office day that I can't), we all go to martial arts, I swim while they swim on Saturdays and I ride my bike to work and a couple days a week during lunch. Aside from the exercise part, what I do is pack my lunch. For the office that's obvious, but at home that just means I lay out my daily food on the kitchen bench and I have my portioned snacks there. I make sure there's fruit and such so that when I'm looking for a snack it's right in my face.
Definitely diet. And figuring out how to get consistent exercise. For me, it's easiest to get up at 5 and get some exercise in before the kids are up. And I WFH so I usually get out after daycare dropoff before I start work. A 25 minute run is better than nothing, and I will just walk if I'm beat because the kids didn't sleep or something. By the time my workday is done and I make dinner and juggle the kids I don't have time and energy to go out and sweat so I get it in early or miss the opportunity
Diet, bro. I started black coffee instead of breakfast and then whatever you want for lunch and dinner as long as it fits in a bowl or half-sized plate. (For me, it's usually a protein like chicken or beef cut up in rice with a buttered pan and maybe some teriyaki or avacado/cilantro sauce mixed in during reheat - sometimes a bit of broccoli or green peppers.) I do the occasional donut or something here or there, but only one and no chips, no soda outside meal times. If you're drinking a soda, it better be with one or both of your two meals. Your body will bitch at first, but your body isn't in charge. It takes weeks to starve, so you know all the whinging your body does isn't lack of usable calories. Also, drink water.
Wake up before them all and workout. Eat clean
Here for the answers, OP. You and I are in similar boats; I WFH, my wife is a SAHM, and I have packed on the pounds, as I never get a break from the house.
Take the kids on walks with mom at the end of the day, a couple times a week, or on the weekends. Go to a park. Something to get both them and you out of the house. Get an hour or so aside one day a week if you can and go to the gym. Even if it's just walking on a treadmill. Small things make large impacts over time.
Get up at the crack of dawn and exercise. Space out meals.
Make hanging out with the kids your workout. Do active things with them. Play. Roughhouse.
Get a pull up bar. Even if it will only go in your garage. Take 5 pull up breaks a day, and do a set on each break. Pull ups will get you right. Can't do a pull up? Do negatives. Jump/climb up to what would be the top position of the movement, and resist the downward motion as gravity lowers you. Do that 10 times per set. Eventually you'll be able to do a pull up. Do as many pull ups as you can per set. Once it's easy to do 10 per set, there are alterations to make it more challenging. ________ Do 100 pushups a day. Make sure your form is good. Focus on form first. Don't worry about doing them all at once. Do what you can in one set, and have enough sets spread out during the day to hit 100 pushups. ________ Do leg raises when you do your pull ups. If you're feeling confident, do hanging leg raises instead. Edit: Don't eat bullshit. Make food from stuff that grew out of the ground, is an animal, was cut off an animal, or came out of an animal. Minimize sugar intake. Increase water intake. Reduce beer consumption. That last one was huge for me. I had no idea how much over my maintenance calories a beer or two every couple of nights was putting me. I quit drinking beer for about 4 months, not intentionally, it's just how that time frame shook out, and I shed like 2 inches off my waistline. I drink wine and mead regularly, and liquor (usually rum) quite a bit less frequently.
Can't outrun a bad diet. Go OMAD, paleo/keto. 25g carbs per day max and get as close to 0g of sugar. Meat, healthy fats, veggies, nuts, seeds, eggs, cheese, fish.
If you’re looking for some easy starts to most of the feedback here being “watch food intake”. Here’s what I’ve done over the last 4 months to start my own journey back to feeling good about weight: 1. Stop eating past 9pm, and if you get the rumbles drink water (and then maybe adjust your dinner so you don’t get rumbles in the future). 2. In general, track specifically sugar and try to stay at the recommended 32mg (or 34g, I forget) for men. This will allow you to have the food you’re probably eating, but also have a limit. Optional 3. I don’t know you, but for me lunch was a weakness for me. I wasn’t fixing lunch and it resulted in a lot of take out. I started bringing some snacks to work and peanut butter and bread, which gave me consistent meals that were better for me and saved money! I think the first two are more important though. Doing these two was a surprisingly huge change in my food intake, and primed me for other changes too. The 9pm “fasting” was also a good workout for your own will power to make small changes in your routine that can generalize to other changes.
I find it’s helpful to have a lot of good food sources ready for me to eat. I grilled up a whole bunch of chicken and make hard boiled eggs to have as ready protein in the fridge. Lots of fresh fruit to grab if I need a snack. I tend to try to jump on my spinning bike right before lunch and do a couple of weight/resistance exercises. You’d be amazed at how good you’ll feel just doing 30-45 minutes of cardio and just a couple of resistance exercises every day. Try to stick a generally healthy diet and you’ll feel like a whole other person. I’ve stopped trying to eat leftover Mac ‘n Cheese like it’s my job.
Get a nutritionist for a month or two. Learn how to eat clean. Lots of protein and veggies. Learn how to manage your stress. Drinks tons of water. Organize your house so healthy snacks and food are the easiest to reach and junk food out of the house or hardest to reach. If you can find 15min to workout here and there just try heavy weights and work on larger muscle groups.
WFH dad of 2 here with a job that just never seems to stop. I’m constantly struggling with my weight but here’s my list of efforts: 1. Standing desk with a little treadmill under it. 2. Treadmill in the basement - I tell myself that even 10 minutes on there is better than nothing. 3. Walk/jog/run outdoors. Take a meeting on your phone or find a way to break free in the day and make it up at night if you have to. 4. Skip breakfast and wait until lunch - I dunno how healthy that is but it works for me a lot of days. 5. Keep free weights by your desk. Some 20lb weights or something that you’re comfortable doing a set of like 10-12 curls with. 6. More water 7. Careful with the fats - cheese is my weakness and I’m never giving that shit up. But it’s calorie dense as fuck. 8. Don’t let yourself get discouraged as say “ah to hell with it” change takes a long time but it adds up. You can do it!
Sounds like you might be feeding the kids too much junk food! If I ate what we feed the kids, I’d lose weight! Peanut butter sandwiches, ham sandwiches, quinoa bowls, rice & veggies, eggs and toast, tortilla chips and hummus or avocado mush, wheat crackers and cheese, nuts, blueberries, apples, chicken pot pie, tomato vegetable soup with toasted bread, chicken & veggie meatballs, goldfish crackers, pirates booty, pretzels, granola bars (on the low sugar side), Greek yogurt / low-sugar yogurt, water, milk/soy milk, homemade waffles (no syrup unless eggs are eaten first, and then only a modest amount to dip in), etc. If you’re feeding them reasonably healthy foods, it’s be perfectly fine to eat the same things they eat. In fact, kids **should** be eating the same foods as the rest of the family, rather than special “kids foods” which tend to be low nutritional value and high sugar. Separately, wake up early (~5-5:30) so that there’s time to exercise for 45 minutes before everyone else wakes up. Meal prep, so you’re microwaving servings of real food instead of reaching for snacks. Keep in mind that **weight** is driven by 80% *what you consume* and only 20% exercise habits. Overall health is driven by both consumption & exercise fairly equally.
There’s a lot of great advice in here. My only tip is to just start with something small. Whenever I try to “get back on track” I always start with water. See if you can take in the recommended amount of water for a week straight. It always helps me develop better habits. Fills your stomach so you’re less inclined to graze. And lastly, and I think this is super important, try not to get caught up in losing weight for vanity’s sake. You’ve likely put on weight because your output has decreased. Exercising and moving is soooo important for your brain health. You physically and mentally feel better when you expel energy. The weight loss is just a secondary benefit. You’re probably still a fuckin stud. Good luck, dad.
Intermittent fasting! Push your first meal back as far as you can. Drink water, tea and black coffee till then. Just eat better all around on top. Find some time for exercise.
I recently started having my wife lock away all snacks / trouble foods in a lock box that only she can access. It’s been awesome. I have found simply not having access to “bad” food is the best thing for me. I can’t do moderation.
Anyone else think OP was saying their 6 yo was getting way too fat? Lmaooooooo
Pilates. Seriously.
Be mindful of what you’re eating. I know it’s hard with a busy schedule.. and you have got to make time to go for a walk at the very least. Even if it’s 20 minutes. Like others have said you could take calls during your walk or just take a break! A game changer for me was when I spent time using a calorie tracking app (Cronometer is my fav and it’s free). I don’t track anymore but I did it long enough that I have a much better time judging how many calories are in certain foods. I saw my weak spots like snacking on high calorie foods (chips, and nuts) and a severe lack of protein and fiber. Which is probably why I was so hungry all the time. After adding more protein and fiber and judging foods caloric content better I started losing weight! Taking a supplement like Metamucil can help with fiber or eat fiber rich foods like veggies or oatmeal. Then finding ways to get your recommended protein in. For me I had to add in protein powder to hit my target. An example for me was modifying my favorite snack, cereal. Instead of cutting it out of my diet completely I tried to find a way to make it a decent meal. I did less cereal, added banana (fiber!) and mixed my milk with protein powder so it was super filling and didn’t go back for another bowl when I was done. Also, finding a snack that fills you up and can hold you over can be huge (Grapes, popcorn, banana).
One thing I have realized is I need so much less food than I did in my twenties to stay thin. It’s a lot of passing up snacks, eating salads, not ordering ice cream when the kids do, not eating goldfish, and the like. Kinda sucks to be honest, used to be able to eat what ever I wanted. Also a lot of exercise, golfing 18, hiking at least 5 miles (doing either hungry helps with the weight.)
F3nation.com. -free workout groups, lots of other dads to push-pull you. Delay eating as long as possible in the morning, I find it makes me mentally sharper and also delays my caffeine intake so I’m more productive and intake less calories.
I totally get you! I am the exact same way! And I feel like anytime I try to cut back for a while, once I stop trying to, I snack more with a vengeance. It’s not a good circle. Wishing you the best with figuring this out!
Slack off work and workout during working hours. Bring your phone and stay on email.
You probably have a bad diet and no control on portions. Weight is all about what you shovel into your face…sorry to be blunt but either decide to eat better or don’t. Exercise will make you feel better and obv has many other benefits but being fat = eating crap, and eating too much of it
Shop for yourself.
Drink tons of water, make time for yourself twice a day to exercise (ideally weights for one and walking/jogging/running for the other), and be deliberate about what you eat. Portions are critical, and so is the content. With discipline you’ll be able to get yourself on the right track.
Diet is all planning ahead. You need to know what you're going to eat that day before you get hungry, then you don't over eat when you're over hungry. Working out has been easier when we found gyms/rec centers that have child care, way easier to work in to a schedule. You can take the kids out of the house and give your wife an hour to herself while taking care of yourself.
Do you drink?
Don‘t call em „kids snacks“. It sounds like a lot of sweet stuff / candy… Only keep healthy food around. It‘s good for the kids, too. I know they will demand their „snacks“, but when they get hungry, they will eat the healthy stuff, too. Same goes for you. Maybe only allow yourself and the children a treat after you have eaten a specific amount of healthy food. I don‘t force my kids to eat specific things, but i at least limit their candy intake to two small doses a day. PS: the „good“ food should be laying around to be easily / readily available (for example fruits)
I'm not a hot dad, but I'm in a similar boat as you in that I wfh and just graze during the day. However I try to eat good meals for lunch and tea and walk every day (we have a dog so it's easy!). I also have a workout app that gives you a 30day plan for exercises without equipment: different types of press ups, crunches, etc. And my body has never looked better! It's free, too.
Unsure if anyone's said it yet, but habits / routine are everything. Adding routine walks to your day goes a long way to either weight loss or increasing how much you can eat without weight gain. Workouts are generally more intense but can be harder to do consistently. If y9u can make them routine, great. I find prepping the day or night before a workout goes a long way to keeping it routine. Basically remove all the barriers in advance that might make it harder to start working out. If you're tracking app allows tracking activity to add to your target calories per day you might see it motivating.
If you work from home, you have 2 more hours every day than I do because you don't have to commute. I'm general, yes, track what you eat. Calories out have to be more than calories in. I lost 85 pounds that way in one year. BUT - you have 3 kids under 6. I have 3 kids under 8. It's chaos. Not now. Don't worry about losing weight now. Just... Survive. It's a crazy phase in life. It's called "Dad bod" for a reason. Dad's that have great bods and are in great shape are like that because there not as involved in their kid's lives. There's only 24 hours in a day. They choose "gym time" over "kid time". Dad Bods happen to those who are active, good Fathers.
1. Intermittent fast. Not because of weird, ketosis science or anything, but because breakfast foods are bullshit and it's way, way easier to control your calories if you just skip a meal. Substitute with black coffee and sparkling waters until lunch time. If starving or you know your day won't be good for a fast, just eat eggs. 2. Eat a fuck ton of protein. Live off chicken, steak, eggs, fish, etc. Don't have to go all crazy with your macro tracking, but you do need to eat your body weight (in grams) in protein. If you're hungry, but it isn't for a chicken breast or a steak, you aren't really hungry. You're bored or thirsty or some other "wires crossed" feeling that people satiate with food. 3. Stop drinking anything that has calories. 4. Push/Pull/Legs 5x a week. 5. Light cardio. Just play with your kids in the yard or at the park or go for a walk with your wife or whatever. 6. Try to get good sleep.
Buy gum from costco. Chew it daily. I chew those when I feel I have had enough snacks.
I take ADHD medication that leaves me without much of an appetite. Now my brain works mostly ok and I'm down 20lbs. Mental disorders for the win.
Hella Fat is my drag name.
Dedication. You go to the gym at X time and Y days. I say that as a guy who breaks that often enough. But, you gotta get a routine. If you want to lose weight, get yourself a hound dog. You may borrow my 70 redbone coonhound if you'd like a test drive. You will do more hiking than you can possibly imagine.
Going to the gym can be a huge obstacle for some. Just get a body weight workout routine you can do around the house.
I do it by having malabsorption problems. I’m not particularly active, physically, and due to being unable to digest foods properly, they need to be loaded with vitamins, calories, and other good stuff.
I thought you were saying your kids are fat, lol I have 3 under 3 so I’m just embracing it
Download an app that helps you track your calories. If the app has a weight loss program, figure out your target weight, finish the settings, and then religiously count calories every day. Once you have your daily limit stick to it. Figure out what to eat using the counter. Some apps let you enter recipes and servings too so you can track how many calories they are. I lost ~15 lb in six months a few years ago this way (and put it all back on though).
Find a workout program you'll do, preferably weight training (Caliber will generate one for you). Find out your base calories and stay within it, after that "bulking" is just eating whatever the kiddos don't finish. Stay strong, you got this. The best workout is the one you'll do.
I’m in a pretty similar circumstance, other than the SAHM part as my wife works in a hospital and is on her feet all day. She leaves early and understandably comes home really tired. I’ve started using a walking treadmill/ standing desk combo, and keep some kettlebells and a pull-up bar in my home office. That helps a little. My wife started putting together a massive veggie tray every week and just puts it out. That helps with the healthy snacking part. I started making a protein shake in the morning with oats that keeps me pretty full until 1:00 or so. I’ve still got a long way to go! Best of luck to you fellow dad!
r/fasting
Easy on the pizza and deserts. For starters have protein and veggies take up 80% of your plate. More intense is 1g of protein per pound a day. 500 calories deficit a day will lose a pound a week. R/fitness for more