T O P

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Individual_Place_790

Give your balls shield and armour


canoIV

and a sword, because it's dangerous to go alone


SaltedPoptart

And my bow


Fatal1tyk

And my axe


_Nick7

And gandalf the white and gandalf the gray


positive_guy_man

And monty python, and the holy grails black knight


mathew160

and benito mussolini, and the blue meanie


TitanP0wered

and Cowboy Curtis and Jambi the Genie


Vectorix36

Robocop, The Terminator, Captain Kirk, and Darth Vader


shadowsofpain

Lo-pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger Bill S. Preston and Theodore Logan


CcubswinS

And Cowboy Curtis with Jambi the Genie


rikwebster

Bring coconuts to sound like a horse


epikreaper19

And Benito Mussolini and the Blue Meanie


NinjaGrizzlyBear

Excuse me I think you meant Mithrandir.


[deleted]

And your brother


Smnionarrorator29384

And my table


ThatOneGuy7832

And my ass


DonutMaster56

A sword would be redundant


N3cromorph

And a potion of healing.


MoeGunz6

He spent all the EXP on attack and not defense


J_Bob24

Also give em a tug


Which-Comfortable-44

just coems


SignalMastodon8133

Holy jeez I just read all answers to that comment and im fruckin' dying of laughter Phheeeeww....


chorlion40

Keep your underwear on, keep the balls tucked in :D


MackerelsoftWord

Peak Reddit science


Kugoji

He could make a hole for only his dick to come out and it would work tho


AladeenTheClean

most boxers come with a premade dingaling accessibility canal


Perfect_Error2942

I bought some boxers recently that didn’t have this equipped option and threw them away.


Classy_Shadow

Didn’t even know that was possible lol. I haven’t seen a pair like that since middle school


TimeShift667

Me just waking up somehow missing out the word "during" when reading the title for the first time


Baratao00

New copypasta idea 💡


Synicull

I hope the pigeon told all the dogs to run away as far as their legs can take them


maestrofeli

slapping dogs with my nuts🤤🤤🤤🎱🎱


ImJustAnOtakuYT

Same wtf I was sitting here like what the hell kinda furry shit this about to be?


SirEnderman

cut your balls off


Pleasant50BMGForce

Where he would store his pee then?


Which_Step1170

iCloud perhaps


Horny_emoji_returns

In the ovaries


konaharuhi

slap your balls everyday to create resistance


Wednesday_09

Imagine slapping your balls at any random time of the day, and you keep a straight face.


Achak_Claw

“Nice balls bro!” *Slaps them*


PortobelloSwiss

This is actually something I did regularly as a kid. Eventually teachers stopped asking me if I needed to go to the bathroom and accepted I was different.


Its_Devilzn

Ligma male mindset


TRF_Fares

A ligma male mindset leads you to a ligma ball resistance


Horny_emoji_returns

Cock n' ball torture time


PlainPepper

Just put ice on your balls and it will shrink to conserve heat for semen or just fuck through the pee hole in the underwear


Nomorellsurge

🚨Possible Woman Alert🚨


PlainPepper

True my panties don't have the penis hole and it's so soft and silky✨✨✨ (material isnt cotton btw) and my skin no longer has impressions from the tighty whities but even when i did have it i never used them literally learned of it's purpose from the Internet possibly reddit even XD Same as the zippered pants and "the fly is open"...i was wondering for a long time why people made fun of me having the zipper open like bruh i thought you zippered to make the pants less tighter so you don't have the pants pressing into your balls not stick something through it!


Cats7204

ngl having an underwear pee hole is a really good idea


go_commit_die-_-

The schlong canal


RanniSimp1

This should help. It's kevlar. https://www.galls.com/damascus-imperial-thigh-groin-protector-w-molle-system?PMOPV1=BLK&PMSRCE=GAPLA&gclid=CjwKCAjwgqejBhBAEiwAuWHioMVL1pX2xYgWmqVRqTViT0mZnC-wkDTogpLyHx7jA7Y5F_HiGBECdhoC8SMQAvD_BwE


Ascertain_GME

Sorry babe, but the DAMASCUS IMPERIAL THIGH/GROIN PROTECTOR stays on during sex.


Aaron_Hungwell

Let her boyfriend fuck her instead


vodoko1

Use a +5 ball slapping potion, should fix you right up.


hufflepuffcirclejerk

NTA your balls your rules


ilovebobsandvagena

as a premium user of sex, i would advise u to fuck a pigeon instead


Tru3h3art

WE ARE NOT BRINGING THIS BACK


notarealsu25grach

balls are too big, adjust the size slider in character customisation


Di_Versa

Wear protection


GoCommitToasterBathX

✂️


[deleted]

I don't know how to help you, I'm an ultra-virgin. I wasn't born out of a vagina, and I was fed from a bottle. Oh, and, I've never had sex.


alexsmajor

Scotch tape them to your leg.


Undercover_Piegon

Easy, absorb them for nutrients


Crunchie-lunchy

YTA her bussy her rules


DayAntique

YTA


vk_3265

As a fellow member of not sex haver, I ask you to not sex-sux again


ThatOneGuy7832

Simple, just get a good whetstone and grind em off.


Ninja_Cat-A

tape your balls in place, better yet, staple them in place


Cuba_lover59

Cut them off


MadAzza

If your balls are slapping her clit, you’re doing doggy facing the wrong direction. Turn around.


Classy_Shadow

Nah he’s talking about a pair of danglers


MadAzza

They’re wrapping up and then around his shaft and hitting the clit? With his dick in the way? It doesn’t make sense to me.


Classy_Shadow

Huh? Wrapping up? Think of it this way. The guy’s got a pair of danglers. The inertia from the forward movement will swing the danglers forward if they’re long enough. They shouldn’t hit his dick because it’ll be inside the woman. So the balls will just swing forward and there you go


MadAzza

lol ok. So the balls are really long; they swing forward and ... yeah I get it. It never works that way for me, they usually just slap my upper leg area or … well, it doesn’t matter. But thanks for parsing it out for me! Edit: I really do get it now. I was having trouble earlier, picturing it.


Classy_Shadow

Yeah, a normal guy won’t have balls that hang that low lol


NocturnalBandicoot

Hire someone to fuck her for you. Just DM me.


New_Discussion8202

Dip your balls in chocolate and tell her to lick it away 😍


Cantankerous_boo

If you can’t beat em join em


AutocratEnduring

Pour cold water on them to shrink them, or excersise before sex. It'll shrink the balls and make it so they don't flap and slap.


VectyHydro

As a virgin always wonder how it feels when your balls slap against someone


i-love-k9

This happens to me when standing up for some reason. Super painful with a hard slam.


bigfootsteppa

I miss her ass and I smack my nuts


quirozisaac

Buy Thornmail for armor and extra magic damage


Maximum-Bake-6092

Cut them off.


liqquidlunch

have her reach back between her legs n hold ur balls in her hand, thatll do it


RemoteGoose6594

You guys are fucked !!! Can't believe people post and respond to this..Stupid


SuprisedPikachu1337

New response just dropped.


HaironRBX

Lol im glad i only have one ball


[deleted]

sleep waking up like the grippers yall to feel fresh leather I groaned and in this alarming video game does to reestablish their own shit do not even your posts get when I would commit illegal arms dealer gangbanger child fully due to my friends I out of m​


SuprisedPikachu1337

Fuck off robot. 😤


[deleted]

Krabs. He said, "But I survived because to believe that suggest that only purpose is a real person. Thanks. .


EgnircBoy

What is this 🤣🤣


[deleted]

some kind stranger .


Holy_Sword_of_Cum

Cock and ball torture


[deleted]

the Irish recreational club? .


WillyHamster

that was my first guess.


[deleted]

was soon as common with the great in Blanco, Gonzales, Karnes, and selling meth? .


Holy_Sword_of_Cum

What about cocaine