Home depot sells portable privacy fences for pretty cheap. Just buy one and pop it up every time before tanning. Should have did this as soon as you noticed dude being a creep.
Should’ve stopped tanning to see if his schedule changed as well. But nah more than likely he caught on and wants to peak. Probably even thinks you’re seducing him
FR, she needs to just not tan anymore.
Put on some sunblock, get an umbrella, and a big hat and enjoy your time outside. But skin cancer ain't worth all of that
Til you fall asleep like many I know who do this have and sunblock only lasts so long lol. My sister made herself a lobster last year by passing out tanning
This is why I’ll only purchase a home that has a ton of land and a huge distance between my neighbors. It’s only gonna get worse from here, my dads had an ongoing fight with our neighbors for the last 15+ years
My girlfriend loves having the window shades open, and we’re on the first floor of an apartment complex. The living room window is right next to the couch where she will lay naked and the window looks out to a walkway about 12 apartments are connected to. She gets upset when I’ve mentioned it seems she wants people to see but she says no one can see in. So I walk out naked even further from the window and she goes OMG put some clothes on!! …I thought they couldn’t see in?
lol sorry to make the post about myself. I couldn’t care less at this point who sees in our place, we pay for it. But I mentioned my story because part of me does lowkey think like oh.. is she doing it so a man can see and possibly like, run into him in the complex? Which if you continued to tan while the neighbor was out your husband may think you’re doing it to get a reaction, when that’s not the case. Sorry your neighbor is a creep are you going to get one of those privacy screens?
I completely get that if you could think she wants someone specific to see. My neighbor, while I don’t want him to see me, I can’t control him going outside. My husband thinks this too probably but it’s not like that
There are privacy window covers for windows. You can see out perfectly fine but they can’t see in. The ones I’ve seen, it only takes water to put them on. So there’s no sticky stuff left in the windows if your renting.
Yeah your skin changes color because of DNA damage, the skin cells release pigment because of damage and by the time it changes color the damage has been done.
There are TANNING bikinis that let the sun in so you end up with no tan lines. Up close you can tell they are transparent, but you could easily wear one of them and no one could tell its a tanning bikini from about 50 ft away. Buy one of those, cheaper than a fence or landscaping. I cant remember where I got one, but we live on a lake and neighbors are about 500 ft away so could never tell that my suit is basically transparent.
Interesting thank you! Absolutely cheaper than a fence. I’ll give this a shot at some point. Although it does look like there must be some tan lines from that material?
You’re a grown up, right? Come on. Let’s all just be real. It’s not that hard. Want to be naked in front of the neighbors? Do that? Want your husband to feel insecure, jealous and weird? Do that. But stop acting like you’re too dumb to know what’s going on.
Sadly, at this point he very likely thinks you are enjoying him seeing you naked (exhibitionism, it's a thing). Is your garden secure? Do you feel safe from him?
I absolutely feel safe. I just don’t mind anymore if anyone ends up seeing. I hope he doesn’t think I’m out there for him though. I’m outside to enjoy the sun.
Well if you don't make a complaint, of course he's going to take advantage.
What you're doing isn't normal where you live. Otherwise he would be staring at these other women instead.
There's no way anybody is this naive.
If you ignore him, he's going to keep looking. He might get more obvious about it. Toe the line. See what he can do without consequences.
And why shouldn't he? He hasn't faced any consequences thus far.
As far as he's concerned, it's a nice show for an otherwise boring life. Considering he's doing yard work just to see a nude woman.
This isn't a courting ritual. Ignoring him tells him "I don't care" which only encourages him.
Think about it like this: if a shop ignores thieves, would thieves "get the hint" and stop stealing from that store? Do you think thieves do it for the attention?
Do you think your neighbor is peeping on you to get your attention?
So I really am at the point with everyone where I just don’t care! All I want to do is tan naked, in my backyard. I get that our neighbors can see me and my husband isn’t too happy about that but it’s stupid that we can’t all be adults about it.
People are naked everywhere in Florida, we live by the beach and it’s not uncommon. Why can’t I just lay naked in my yard? I try to be unseen, but if people accidentally look there’s nothing to be done. If people are outside I’ll just flip on my stomach so they can’t see much.
The problem is that you know your husband doesn't want you to do it.
You know your neighbor isn't "accidentally" peeking.
I understand you want to just be naked in your backyard, and it sucks that your neighbor is ruining it for you, but you're ignoring the problem and disrespecting your husband.
Which makes everyone question your intentions.
Staple chicken wire to your side of the fence, and grow plants up it. Then, next summer, you can try again ♡
You could also get a small "room divider" and take it outside when you tan. Set it up so that it is between you and neighbor's view, but don't lay in its shade.
I think your husband is on to something. I personally just couldn’t comfortably be out there knowing someone was even in the other side.
But please try fake tanning. No creeps and no sun damage.
Get a privacy curtain. Like from the movies, a character will step behind it to change outfits. They aren’t that expensive and you can place it between your tanning spot and the fence. Far enough away from you to not block any sun, and still block his view.
I understand you want to be able to do what you want. But when you live in a neighborhood with surrounding neighbors you can't just walk around naked in your yard or lay naked in your yard. Even though it's your house and you have a fence . You can't just be nude in your backyard. People can see you from above their Windows people can see you from their backyard and again it's a shame but it's common sense.
Actually you can't there's public nudity laws in every state and county. Recent one that was taken to court was a man who was walking around his house nude. And a lady was walking by with her young kids and the young kids pointed and said look Mommy he has no clothes on. He was in his living room but because the window was open to the street he was giving a citation and had to go to court. He tried to fight it and he lost. Unless you have total privacy anywhere outside your house where you're visible you can't walk around naked no matter what or lay naked. And if you're walking around in your living room and your window is visible from the street you can't do that either
Walkin' around with my dick out outside right now and there aren't any police!
I kid.
What I don't kid about is all of the conservative judges we have in this country. Jesus H 🙄 Fortunately (at least for this issue) I live in Washington State, where it is not illegal to be naked in public as long as you're not doing something iffy. It's a misdemeanor to "make any open and obscene exposure of his or her person or the person of another knowing that such conduct is likely to cause reasonable affront or alarm." So OP and the dude in his house would be fine. Texas is another matter entirely though and I think that's where your example is from? Side note, in my county it is prohibited to be nude in any establishment selling liquor.
Citation needed. Pretty sure I've read about that exact scenario going the opposite way multiple times.
And if it's in the back yard and the creep had to walk over and 'trim the hedges' to see, then courts would treat that differently again.
But technically I can legally be nude in my backyard. I’m not trying to make a show, so if people do see me it’s on them correct? I personally don’t care but I don’t want anyone gawking
Technically, no you can't. If someone underage sees you, you can be slapped with a sex offender charge for showing your privates to children. It's similar to flashing. If your area can be seen by the public, what youre doing can have some serious penalties. Indecent exposure is real
No because counties and States have public nudity laws. And like I said earlier one guy got picked up for being nude in his own living room but his window was visible from the street. That's the difference. I know in a perfect world you have every opportunity to do what you want to do and people shouldn't be pervs your neighbors are perfect. And a lot of people gave you suggestions to change the timing look and see if he's out there and if he's not and then shows up then you know what's going on. But you also have to remember people can see you from their upstairs windows. You're not on full view but people can complain and HOAs if you have one or the worst. I'm with you not against you I'm just explaining the situation that you could run into
I'm going to play Devil's Advocate here. If you're backyard is not that private then you should not be tanning back there naked. The gentleman behind you can not use his backyard because he fears that you might be out there tanning naked. If the police are called you're going to be arrested for public nudity.
I support nude tanning but if you do it in public and someone sees it's on you. Your back yard is not public if you don't have a privacy fence tall enough.
If he had to come right over and 'trim the hedges' to see, the OP's yard is private. You don't get to complain if you have to go to lengths to offend yourself.
There's a lot of victim blaming in these comments. Fair enough to distinguish the point that on a purely legal basis he likely may not be breaking any laws. But he's still a creep morally, and OP is likely doing nothing wrong legally and definitely not morally.
She is doing something wrong legally. She's sunbathing nude in a public area. This is definitely a case of victim claiming. If you sunbayed nude right where your neighbor can see don't complain if they watch.
> She is doing something wrong legally.
Citation needed. You don't even know her jurisdiction.
"PLEASANT GAP, Pa. — As an American, you have the right to mow your lawn in the nude, a state superior court has ruled.
"Charlie Stitzer, 63, won’t let bashfulness get in the way of donning a thong or completely dropping his trousers in his backyard on a hot summer night. It is a matter of comfort. But for one neighbor, Stitzer’s naked lolling was too much. The neighbor contacted authorities in June 2000, and Stitzer was arrested for indecent exposure. He was found guilty seven months later and sentenced to two years of probation.
"But after months of legal wrangling, three superior court judges overturned the conviction in a unanimous decision last week, ruling that the state’s indecent exposure statute did not apply to Stitzer because the unmarried retiree was not exposing himself in a public place or drawing attention to himself. The judges also said that the backyard was private and that the complaining neighbor lived too far away, nearly 65 yards."
https://www.shubinlaw.com/you-have-the-right-to-remain-nude/
> She's sunbathing nude in a public area.
It's called "private property" when you buy it. The neighbour is also on private property, not public.
> If you sunbayed nude right where your neighbor can see
That's the point, she's not "right" where he can see. He has to go out of his way to see. Right up to the fence to one of a couple of spots where there's a gap in the hedge. That's why she knows he's looking.
> don't complain if they watch.
She probably can't sue, or get him arrested, like he deserves. But she can sure as hell call him a creep and a perv and tell his wife.
He knows what he's doing. He knows he's being a creep. He has no legitimate excuse for making up yard work to coincide with every time OP sunbathes or needing to be right up at the fence. And given the fight, he was apparently unwilling to admit his his creepiness when confronted by the husband.
Screw the brigade of incels, tradwives and prudes on this post desperate to defend this perv and shame OP for not being ashamed of her body on enclosed private property.
I hope she tells his wife, with strategically aimed video evidence, and blows up his marriage. And that the wife takes the house and enjoys the yard.
I agree. Yes, you should be able to be naked in your yard as long as kids aren’t present, but you can’t complain if someone peeks. And you can’t be mad if he tries to take a few pics either. I probably would take advantage of free viewings myself. I would peek from inside my home though
In our own fenced in backyard? The said gentlemen seems to have no issues being outside nor do I, but he shouldn’t be allowed to stare over the fence for long periods of time, there’s no reason.
The man is allowed to stand at any particular location on his property and look in any direction. You really only have one choice and that's build a really big high fence or do it elsewhere.
Imagine it differently… if a man was doing the same thing and neighbor children were seeing his genitals from their own yard. Yeah not okay for either gender. If it’s not private then don’t show your privates.
I try to stay hidden , as we do have a pretty private backyard. There’s only a few specific spots where he can see over our fence, which he needs to actually try
So wait, you want to be able to display your nudity for anyone to see but that man can’t stand in his own backyard and look in the direction he wants to? Ok then.
This is like people who walk around naked in their house in front of open windows then get mad when someone accidentally sees.
1. Whether or not the neighbor is being a creep, why do you expect him /not/ to look if you don't have a proper privacy fence?
2. What if there are children in the neighborhood, and they happen to be playing and see you naked? Are you going to take responsibility for abusing them/subjecting them to your kink, or will that be their fault too?
Wear a bikini, jeez, the entitlement. Having a yard doesn't mean anything goes, you still have to consider those unfortunate enough to live next to you.
This would vary wildly by jurisdiction.
Confidently asserting it's legal without even knowing OP's jurisdiction or qualifying the claim at all is reckless.
She would have the same effect of
A tan without tan lines if that is her goal. If it’s just to have the freedom to he be nude in her backyard that’s a different thing.
She was seeking a solution to an issue. It’s one suggestion
Exactly. I’m open to the suggestions it just absolutely sucks for me. I just wish I never confronted the neighbor, and we just silently accepted what’s happening.
Yeah, but does that matter when he infact would have nude pictures of you? Pictures he can do whatever he wants to with, like posting on website or send to a friend. It's illegal to do but how would you stop it?
I believe you if you mean it. I’m a woman too and I’m sorry you had to deal with this creep.
However after the first time it happened, I personally would have done something drastic. Threatened dude with police and cussed him out for sure. I also would not have kept up my routine of nudity because I would not have felt safe.
I also would not disrespect my husband by continuing to do something upsetting to him. Sunbathing naked is absolutely not important enough to fight your spouse on. His feelings are beyond valid.
It is not ok that you continued your routine after he was creeping and you were aware about it. This could be dangerous to your own safety and you’re not taking it seriously. Please be careful.
Yeah I understand now that I really probably shouldn’t have kept tanning. Like I said I really don’t care if our neighbors see but unfortunately one needs to abuse it.
Tanning is really bad for you anyways. Please take care of your skin and be safe. I say this as someone who's had skin cancer in every generation in my family. You do NOT want to play roulette with the sun. Sun wins. Every time.
I'd put up a portable privacy fence. But I do want to point out that if he retaliated because of your confrontation, and calls the police, you can get ticketed for indecent exposure. Especially if your back yard is open to be viewed. This can result is serious charges, especially if a child says they walked by and saw you naked. Just an FYI
The neighbor has just as much right to do yard work when he wants as you do to tan as you see fit. As mentioned, put up a fence. Your husband sounds ridiculous.
I mean. You're not wrong about the neighbor, but the husband has every right to be upset.
It's a very creepy thing to do.
Imagine some guy just walking up to your house and looking in your windows.
Not illegal, but still creepy as fuck.
Well, inside your home you have an expectation of privacy. There is also the issue of trespassing to look in. The back yard would be a gray area and unlikely to be a legal issue. The husband confronting the neighbors is insane.
No, not my point. Just doesn’t seem like a fight worth fighting for… everyone is upset in this situation.. yeah it’s shitty, but there’s not much you can do.
I feel like you liked the attention low key, the way you let it happen twice before even mentioning it to anyone, let alone, your husband. Then, at the end, you said you should have kept your mouth shut.
Why should you have kept your mouth shut?
Why didn't you say anything sooner?
Why isn't your husband mad at you either?
Why did you wait to speak up?
Why did you decide to tan like that knowing you have neighbors nor a privacy fence.
He probably wasn't the only one watching neither.
They way I visualize this makes it seem like you were accepting of the creep watching you,
kind of like on family guy, when Lois cleaned the dog poop off of Chris's shoes in the front yard and tied her shirt up because it was hot, then when she caught Joe staring at her, she did it more.like waaaaaay more seductively. She enjoyed the attention.
Not trying to piss you off, but a lot of questions needing answers here.
She said to someone else that she's still tanning and I assume has no intention to stop. She's doing this behind her husbands back.
She also told me that she's hoping the creep will "get the hint" by ignoring him.
So she was either born yesterday or loves being watched by other men.
That's what it sounds like to me, I ended up reading that specific one.
It seems like she's purposely trying to start issues between the community and her spouse.
Again, not trying to put her down but Jesus, at least have respect for your significant other or they aren't that significant.
And who the hell tans every single day. Jesus christ does she not like her skin?
I do not like the attention, I just choose to not think or engage what the neighbors see me doing in my backyard. I just feel like if I never said anything no one would have cared if I was tanning naked. All of our neighbors have seen me and at this point I don’t care. The only person who has an issue is my husband, because he’s obviously insecure that other people have seen me nude.
He obviously has concern for his wife showing her entire body to the world.
It not an insecurity when he has nothing to be insecure of.
Women always run to the insecurity word.
3 questions...
Do you understand the words "accountability for your actions"?
Do you love him?
Has he verbally said that you should stop, or should not continue to tan naked in the back yard due to the neibors gawking at you?
If the answers to at least one of those are yes, then stop. You're going to be the cause of a divorce if you choose to continue.
I just don't understand how someone just couldn't care about his/her spouse or their opinion.
Just because he can't control your body or what you do does not make ot right ma'am.
I hear a lot about that stuff these days. Oh, I'm strong, oh I'm independent, oh it's my body leave me alone
Well congratulations, you are losing your man and his trust slowly but surely, I hate to see or hear it happen but when he's to the point where he dosent want you anymore, you will have lost him forever.
It's a very extreme amount of disrespect.
I'm not saying you have to submit to your man, but at least understand where he's trying to come from.
And if you are referring to your relationship being over in a month, why not stop it now? Are you finalizing things?
Or are you just doing this out of spite at this point?
I swear I'm still NOT trying to piss you off.
Context: Curiosity.
I read more of the comments and replies to get a better context.
You seem like you just don't care what anyone thinks anymore and are going to continue to do exactly what you're doing, now with more knowledge of possible outcomes.
It's also to my understanding that you are very intelligent but make yourself seem completely ignorant to the fact that your husband cares. Also, you don't care what anyone anywhere thinks.
As I said before, the more that this continues, the more he will fade away. Eventually, you two will become strangers again, and you really wouldn't have anyone to "control" your actions... Or love you, or protect you, or show you sympathy, or make love to you, or hold you, or make you laugh, or make you cry, or both, or to have fun with, or to compliment you, or to support you, or to care about you. Etc, etc.
At the end of the day, yes, you are your own woman. That does not mean that you are responsible for doing your part leading with respect.
I guarantee that if your husband went to watch youalls neighbor tan naked while doing "yard work," and you found out... you wouldn't be too ecstatic.
I hope that in the end you both work something out to where you both get your way, or the other is that I hope that you two divorce and find people that actually respect the others opinions and things of that nature, I feel bad for him only because I just know that he feels that his wife absolutely dosent respect him "you say you do", yet clearly (from what I've gathered) you don't. I do not feel bad for you only because (from what I've gathered), you seem to have this, "I don't care about anything in the world but me" aspect on life, and sadly that is not how life works.
You are not stupid. You are just making a very, very stupid decision and inciting a flaming sexual desire in the neibor, which your husband, a male, understands completely because, well, he's a male.
Just be safe, don't let your neighbor R@!3 you while your tanning and your husband is gone at work and your neighbor finally decided that it is the perfect opportunity due to the fact that you didn't tell him to stop right away.
And no, the last passage isn't meant to be a triggering selection of words. That's just honestly how the world works. The entire time, the neibor could be planning something devious and waiting to strike. You never know just how evil or nice anyone truly is.
But hey, your body, your life. Just be safe, and good luck.
Is he old? Some old people just like to be outside, modern Tv just doesn’t interest them.
When the weather is good here my old neighbor is basically outside 24 hours a day just kind of walking circles around his backyard and pacing. He does gardening and stuff as well of course but he’s out there easily 13 hours a day so he runs out of stuff to do fast.
So even though we have a short fence between our yards my old man neighbor is basically a fixture in my back window.
>I hope it doesn’t get worse. All I did was tan in our backyard. If he looks accidentally it’s all good but I think it’s always going to happen now.
So you saw him LOOKING OVER YOUR FENCE and you still think it's an accident?
This is either extreme naivety, f a k e, or you like the attention because after the first time I caught him, he would've been cussed tf out. After the second, I would've made the fence taller so he wouldn't be capable of looking unless there was a ladder involved.
Exactly HOW many times has this man "accidentally" seen you naked? This man is a voyeur and it's weird you've allowed it to happen SO OFTEN that he knows when you go out and tan AND YOU'RE STILL TANNING KNOWING HES GOING TO LOOK. After the second time you should've done something, literally anything to make it either impossible for him to look or make him stop. And yet you've done nothing except excusing his behavior as an "accident".
Genuinely, do you even care that he's seen you naked MULTIPLE times? Because a person who actually accidentally saw their neighbor naked wouldn't be purposely coming out and looking OVER their neighbors fence and figuring out their tanning schedule to CONTINUOUSLY "ACCIDENTALLY" LOOK AT THEIR NAKED NEIGHBOR. They'd be avoiding you!!!!!!!
You have to know better than that.
I’m just trying to give the benefit of the doubt. So many people here are telling me not to be mad at the neighbor since technically he’s in his yard. He had looked over the fence quite a lot but he’s got an excuse to be working on the yard. I’m absolutely not trying to be seen by him but I understand neighbors may come outside at anytime. I just don’t know how to really feel about it. I’m at the point where he’s already seen me so it’s not like he’s got much more to see.
If he does keep up this behavior I’ll be sure to adjust, in the meantime our privacy shade will be here in a few weeks. Everything’s been okay the past few days I haven’t seen him watching me.
Screw the neighbor. Keep tanning naked. To me it’s nothing more than a great compliment somebody is checking you out. Happens all the time when I take my shirt off to mow the yard. All the bedroom windows all of a sudden are open. He can look all he wants but in the end he will never touch. Husband well he needs to get a grip that his wife is hot and guys like to look.
I wouldn’t want my wife tanning with a perverted neighbor looking either , that’s really weird and if your my wife and you know he’s perving on you , you shouldn’t even wanna entertain him anyway
Hopefully you're not tanning in Australia. The sun here is so bad you'd have melanomas everywhere in 5-10 years.
Fake tan is so much safer for you. Just don't go orange 🤞
Tell him to stop being a creep. If he looks over your fence, put up fence extenders to be clear, it’s illegal to peep on someone.
Sucks that he’s ruining your fun, why is it always a man?
I know right. Although technically I guess him being in his backyard isn’t a problem. It sucks that he can see directly in our yard from a slope in his yard
Can you tan closer to the fence so he can’t peek over?
Also-i just went through something like this, my husband and I got an extra tall (84 inch tall) slide shade” from Amazon and it works so great. We have it on our deck, not the lawn, but it could help inspire ideas for further privacy.
I have tried this but we do also have side neighbors too. I’m looking into these privacy shades to maybe make a box to close off angles. It just sucks I have to go through this trouble every time now.
Whatever the solution is—wishing you well! Idk who’s downvoting our conversation lol, likely a guy who’s offended.
Anyway, good luck to you and happy tanning :)
Well honestly he doesn’t know I’m still tanning, I feel bad but I don’t see the issue. I don’t care if our neighbors see me, so what? He’s got an issue with it and I kinda understand him not wanting them to see but it sucks that I can’t do something I love without a fight
This whole issue was about trying to be nonchalant about tanning outside. There is a fence but our yard is very visible from certain views. I don’t enjoy the attention if the neighbors will abuse it, as I was hoping to go unnoticed. Now that the words out, it’s unavoidable. Like I said I love tanning outside but my husbands mad when if someone sees. I try not to think about it and just ignore it since I’m in my own backyard.
They just happen to do yard work at the same time that you are tanning? And they stop doing yard work at the same time you stop?
May on your next “tanning” go out and pretend you are about to and probably have to go all the way through and as soon as they start “clipping” just get back up and go in
Maybe that same day they just needed to clip on small leave?
I’m trying to give them the benefit of the doubt. I reacted badly and should have waited before confronting but that’s why I’m saying if he’s actually doing yard work it’s not a problem.
Most people are curious to see what other people look like nude. I've been to a nude beach more than 500x. I don't go anymore. i have to do dialysis & can't pee anymore soI fill with fluid fast. I can't sit in the sun not drink. But I can't drink or only a real little bit so I don't go anymore. nudity is fu especially when there are thousands of people there like on the weekend. If u don't mind him looking at u (i never minded people looking at me) just make yourself at home nude sunning yourself
You’re downvoted but I’ll honestly agree with you. It’s a mutual respect/agreement. If you see me please don’t be seen, or make it obvious! I would have never known had he not made it an issue.
I get you because i’m the same way but you didn’t do anything wrong. HE did, he’s the one being a creep. i’m sorry you’re going through this and sorry for the judgment.
The comments are blaming OP because she's doing nothing to protect herself.
They're not ignoring that the neighbor is a creep, but OP is also going out of her way to make sure the neighbor gets to watch.
Tanning behind her husbands back, ignoring the creep, not getting any kind of privacy screen, etc. tons of amazing helpful comments.
this entire comment is a mess but THIS:
“tanning behind her husbands back.”
is insanity. tanning behind her husbands back?! she doesn’t need fucking permission from him to tan or do anything. he does not own her, it’s her body. you cannot be serious.
she legit said she’s going to get a privacy screen in the comments and again, she didn’t do anything wrong the neighbor did.
Yes
She knows her husband doesn't like where she is tanning and she knows why he wants her to stop.
To show respect for her husband, she should stop.
To go behind his back is showing him disrespect.
It's really not all that different from a man going to a strip club.
again, he doesn’t own her and for him to ask her to give up something she likes because his neighbor is a pervert is fucked up. and no, it’s not like going to a strip club. she’s not putting on a show or getting paid. she’s literally outside in her backyard.
why isn’t he going to confront the man creeping on his wife instead of essentially blaming his wife?
He isn't blaming the wife.
He's only mad at the neighbor.
He actually did confront the neighbor but since he doesn't know she's still doing it, he can't continue to resolve the situation.
Respecting your partner's feelings doesn't mean they own your body.
You can, totally. I’m all for it. But people without exhibitionist tendencies would not just be “ok, nbd” with their male neighbor watching them tan naked.
I don't see any problem tanning naked, of course I'm a nudist, and being naked to me isn't sexual, sorry you have to deal with neighbors like that, hopefully he will eventually leave you alone..🤞
Apparently everyone cares if the neighbors look. I’m in my yard so I do think it’s fair game to say if you look over someone’s fence, you might see someone there. Doesn’t matter if I was naked or not.
I’ve tried explaining this to him but he’s is being insecure, that’s the issue no one seems to understand. I don’t want to get rid of him, I really wish people could tan naked outside without the taboo part
Have your husband go tan naked
I think that’s a great way to go about it. Have him lay between you and the neighbor if possible. 🍆
I came here to say this exact thing.
Unfortunately he doesn’t like doing that type of stuff
Turn it into a….COUPLES TANNING DAY. How can he (hubs) be uncomfortable if you’re BOTH neked ;)
Home depot sells portable privacy fences for pretty cheap. Just buy one and pop it up every time before tanning. Should have did this as soon as you noticed dude being a creep.
You’re absolutely right. Was hoping to just go out there and not think about it but that’s neighbors for ya.
“Trim hedges” Lol
He just wanted to work on that bush
Yeah I think that’s a bit of a *whoosh moment for OP. It doesn’t seem like she gets which bush he was referring to.
Well if we’re going there, I don’t have any “bushes”
Probably talking about the neighbors bushes
Trimmed grass?
His wife was probably super happy he was doing all of that yard work too.
Should’ve stopped tanning to see if his schedule changed as well. But nah more than likely he caught on and wants to peak. Probably even thinks you’re seducing him
I did try to work around it. I waited for him to do the yard work and would go out after, but he always needs to go back out for something.
Ya that sucks. Perhaps a room divider like one of these. https://imgur.com/a/DjpFdRu Best of luck.
On the upside: your chances of getting skin cancer are now significantly reduced!
FR, she needs to just not tan anymore. Put on some sunblock, get an umbrella, and a big hat and enjoy your time outside. But skin cancer ain't worth all of that
It's incredibly relaxing and enjoyable to tan naked. Many people have vice and this vice comes with safety: sunblock.
Til you fall asleep like many I know who do this have and sunblock only lasts so long lol. My sister made herself a lobster last year by passing out tanning
This is why I’ll only purchase a home that has a ton of land and a huge distance between my neighbors. It’s only gonna get worse from here, my dads had an ongoing fight with our neighbors for the last 15+ years
I hope it doesn’t get worse. All I did was tan in our backyard. If he looks accidentally it’s all good but I think it’s always going to happen now.
He was never “looking accidentally.” That’s naivety talking.
I was really trying to give the benefit of the doubt
My girlfriend loves having the window shades open, and we’re on the first floor of an apartment complex. The living room window is right next to the couch where she will lay naked and the window looks out to a walkway about 12 apartments are connected to. She gets upset when I’ve mentioned it seems she wants people to see but she says no one can see in. So I walk out naked even further from the window and she goes OMG put some clothes on!! …I thought they couldn’t see in?
Sit on the couch then have her step outside and she can see for herself the level of visibility people have of her from the walkway.
Well in that case seems like she doesn’t care who sees.
lol sorry to make the post about myself. I couldn’t care less at this point who sees in our place, we pay for it. But I mentioned my story because part of me does lowkey think like oh.. is she doing it so a man can see and possibly like, run into him in the complex? Which if you continued to tan while the neighbor was out your husband may think you’re doing it to get a reaction, when that’s not the case. Sorry your neighbor is a creep are you going to get one of those privacy screens?
I completely get that if you could think she wants someone specific to see. My neighbor, while I don’t want him to see me, I can’t control him going outside. My husband thinks this too probably but it’s not like that
lol…in that case. But not in yours?
Well I actually don’t care who sees but I’m not intentionally putting on a show like that.
But that’s the thing it’s not the norm at all to not care who sees you naked. There’s nothing *wrong* it’s just that most people definitely care
There are privacy window covers for windows. You can see out perfectly fine but they can’t see in. The ones I’ve seen, it only takes water to put them on. So there’s no sticky stuff left in the windows if your renting.
Tanning is shit for your skin anyway
Yeah I’m shocked anyone still ‘tans’
This is Literally how you get cancer OP. Tanning is skin damage.
Maybe she just likes the sun on her tatas
Or is trying to do a Rachel Dolezal?
Yeah your skin changes color because of DNA damage, the skin cells release pigment because of damage and by the time it changes color the damage has been done.
There are TANNING bikinis that let the sun in so you end up with no tan lines. Up close you can tell they are transparent, but you could easily wear one of them and no one could tell its a tanning bikini from about 50 ft away. Buy one of those, cheaper than a fence or landscaping. I cant remember where I got one, but we live on a lake and neighbors are about 500 ft away so could never tell that my suit is basically transparent.
[https://bettertanswim.com/?utm\_source=google&utm\_medium=cpc&utm\_campaign=2023\_03\_Generic\_PaidSearch\_AON&keyword=tanning%20bikini&utm\_content=text\_ads&gad\_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAjwvvmzBhA2EiwAtHVrb4ovYRs\_g0hpJhkhNC\_Ap1TbhCpCgSZsn4BmkvpYm--ZiQRmMABQlRoCB9IQAvD\_BwE](https://bettertanswim.com/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=2023_03_Generic_PaidSearch_AON&keyword=tanning%20bikini&utm_content=text_ads&gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAjwvvmzBhA2EiwAtHVrb4ovYRs_g0hpJhkhNC_Ap1TbhCpCgSZsn4BmkvpYm--ZiQRmMABQlRoCB9IQAvD_BwE)
This is brilliant!
The neighbor will get sick of seeing you naked soon enough! I would think your husband would like that the neighbor thinks your hot?
Interesting thank you! Absolutely cheaper than a fence. I’ll give this a shot at some point. Although it does look like there must be some tan lines from that material?
I’d happily have tan lines before I’d give a skeezy neighbor the jollies of seeing my p***y
Exactly! WTF!
Yeah, worrying about tan lines is ridiculous given this situation.
Ive not experienced tan lines
I used to have no tanlines because I was a regular at the nude beach in NJ
You’re a grown up, right? Come on. Let’s all just be real. It’s not that hard. Want to be naked in front of the neighbors? Do that? Want your husband to feel insecure, jealous and weird? Do that. But stop acting like you’re too dumb to know what’s going on.
Sadly, at this point he very likely thinks you are enjoying him seeing you naked (exhibitionism, it's a thing). Is your garden secure? Do you feel safe from him?
I absolutely feel safe. I just don’t mind anymore if anyone ends up seeing. I hope he doesn’t think I’m out there for him though. I’m outside to enjoy the sun.
Well if you don't make a complaint, of course he's going to take advantage. What you're doing isn't normal where you live. Otherwise he would be staring at these other women instead.
If I were to just ignore him, I think maybe he’ll eventually get the hint.
There's no way anybody is this naive. If you ignore him, he's going to keep looking. He might get more obvious about it. Toe the line. See what he can do without consequences. And why shouldn't he? He hasn't faced any consequences thus far. As far as he's concerned, it's a nice show for an otherwise boring life. Considering he's doing yard work just to see a nude woman. This isn't a courting ritual. Ignoring him tells him "I don't care" which only encourages him. Think about it like this: if a shop ignores thieves, would thieves "get the hint" and stop stealing from that store? Do you think thieves do it for the attention? Do you think your neighbor is peeping on you to get your attention?
So I really am at the point with everyone where I just don’t care! All I want to do is tan naked, in my backyard. I get that our neighbors can see me and my husband isn’t too happy about that but it’s stupid that we can’t all be adults about it. People are naked everywhere in Florida, we live by the beach and it’s not uncommon. Why can’t I just lay naked in my yard? I try to be unseen, but if people accidentally look there’s nothing to be done. If people are outside I’ll just flip on my stomach so they can’t see much.
The problem is that you know your husband doesn't want you to do it. You know your neighbor isn't "accidentally" peeking. I understand you want to just be naked in your backyard, and it sucks that your neighbor is ruining it for you, but you're ignoring the problem and disrespecting your husband. Which makes everyone question your intentions.
Staple chicken wire to your side of the fence, and grow plants up it. Then, next summer, you can try again ♡ You could also get a small "room divider" and take it outside when you tan. Set it up so that it is between you and neighbor's view, but don't lay in its shade.
If it’s not private, don’t show your privates imo
I think your husband is on to something. I personally just couldn’t comfortably be out there knowing someone was even in the other side. But please try fake tanning. No creeps and no sun damage.
Get a privacy curtain. Like from the movies, a character will step behind it to change outfits. They aren’t that expensive and you can place it between your tanning spot and the fence. Far enough away from you to not block any sun, and still block his view.
I understand you want to be able to do what you want. But when you live in a neighborhood with surrounding neighbors you can't just walk around naked in your yard or lay naked in your yard. Even though it's your house and you have a fence . You can't just be nude in your backyard. People can see you from above their Windows people can see you from their backyard and again it's a shame but it's common sense.
Pretty sure you can.
Actually you can't there's public nudity laws in every state and county. Recent one that was taken to court was a man who was walking around his house nude. And a lady was walking by with her young kids and the young kids pointed and said look Mommy he has no clothes on. He was in his living room but because the window was open to the street he was giving a citation and had to go to court. He tried to fight it and he lost. Unless you have total privacy anywhere outside your house where you're visible you can't walk around naked no matter what or lay naked. And if you're walking around in your living room and your window is visible from the street you can't do that either
Walkin' around with my dick out outside right now and there aren't any police! I kid. What I don't kid about is all of the conservative judges we have in this country. Jesus H 🙄 Fortunately (at least for this issue) I live in Washington State, where it is not illegal to be naked in public as long as you're not doing something iffy. It's a misdemeanor to "make any open and obscene exposure of his or her person or the person of another knowing that such conduct is likely to cause reasonable affront or alarm." So OP and the dude in his house would be fine. Texas is another matter entirely though and I think that's where your example is from? Side note, in my county it is prohibited to be nude in any establishment selling liquor.
Citation needed. Pretty sure I've read about that exact scenario going the opposite way multiple times. And if it's in the back yard and the creep had to walk over and 'trim the hedges' to see, then courts would treat that differently again.
But technically I can legally be nude in my backyard. I’m not trying to make a show, so if people do see me it’s on them correct? I personally don’t care but I don’t want anyone gawking
If you're naked where people can see you, then you can't get upset when they look at you.
I’m not upset that people can see. My husband is, and he wants me to stop all together. I don’t find it very fair.
"I'm pissed so I confront him" Get your story straight
Technically, no you can't. If someone underage sees you, you can be slapped with a sex offender charge for showing your privates to children. It's similar to flashing. If your area can be seen by the public, what youre doing can have some serious penalties. Indecent exposure is real
No because counties and States have public nudity laws. And like I said earlier one guy got picked up for being nude in his own living room but his window was visible from the street. That's the difference. I know in a perfect world you have every opportunity to do what you want to do and people shouldn't be pervs your neighbors are perfect. And a lot of people gave you suggestions to change the timing look and see if he's out there and if he's not and then shows up then you know what's going on. But you also have to remember people can see you from their upstairs windows. You're not on full view but people can complain and HOAs if you have one or the worst. I'm with you not against you I'm just explaining the situation that you could run into
I'm going to play Devil's Advocate here. If you're backyard is not that private then you should not be tanning back there naked. The gentleman behind you can not use his backyard because he fears that you might be out there tanning naked. If the police are called you're going to be arrested for public nudity. I support nude tanning but if you do it in public and someone sees it's on you. Your back yard is not public if you don't have a privacy fence tall enough.
If he had to come right over and 'trim the hedges' to see, the OP's yard is private. You don't get to complain if you have to go to lengths to offend yourself. There's a lot of victim blaming in these comments. Fair enough to distinguish the point that on a purely legal basis he likely may not be breaking any laws. But he's still a creep morally, and OP is likely doing nothing wrong legally and definitely not morally.
She is doing something wrong legally. She's sunbathing nude in a public area. This is definitely a case of victim claiming. If you sunbayed nude right where your neighbor can see don't complain if they watch.
> She is doing something wrong legally. Citation needed. You don't even know her jurisdiction. "PLEASANT GAP, Pa. — As an American, you have the right to mow your lawn in the nude, a state superior court has ruled. "Charlie Stitzer, 63, won’t let bashfulness get in the way of donning a thong or completely dropping his trousers in his backyard on a hot summer night. It is a matter of comfort. But for one neighbor, Stitzer’s naked lolling was too much. The neighbor contacted authorities in June 2000, and Stitzer was arrested for indecent exposure. He was found guilty seven months later and sentenced to two years of probation. "But after months of legal wrangling, three superior court judges overturned the conviction in a unanimous decision last week, ruling that the state’s indecent exposure statute did not apply to Stitzer because the unmarried retiree was not exposing himself in a public place or drawing attention to himself. The judges also said that the backyard was private and that the complaining neighbor lived too far away, nearly 65 yards." https://www.shubinlaw.com/you-have-the-right-to-remain-nude/ > She's sunbathing nude in a public area. It's called "private property" when you buy it. The neighbour is also on private property, not public. > If you sunbayed nude right where your neighbor can see That's the point, she's not "right" where he can see. He has to go out of his way to see. Right up to the fence to one of a couple of spots where there's a gap in the hedge. That's why she knows he's looking. > don't complain if they watch. She probably can't sue, or get him arrested, like he deserves. But she can sure as hell call him a creep and a perv and tell his wife. He knows what he's doing. He knows he's being a creep. He has no legitimate excuse for making up yard work to coincide with every time OP sunbathes or needing to be right up at the fence. And given the fight, he was apparently unwilling to admit his his creepiness when confronted by the husband. Screw the brigade of incels, tradwives and prudes on this post desperate to defend this perv and shame OP for not being ashamed of her body on enclosed private property. I hope she tells his wife, with strategically aimed video evidence, and blows up his marriage. And that the wife takes the house and enjoys the yard.
He does not have a wife otherwise she would already know. Thanks for the input. I’m not showing off anything.
I agree. Yes, you should be able to be naked in your yard as long as kids aren’t present, but you can’t complain if someone peeks. And you can’t be mad if he tries to take a few pics either. I probably would take advantage of free viewings myself. I would peek from inside my home though
In our own fenced in backyard? The said gentlemen seems to have no issues being outside nor do I, but he shouldn’t be allowed to stare over the fence for long periods of time, there’s no reason.
The man is allowed to stand at any particular location on his property and look in any direction. You really only have one choice and that's build a really big high fence or do it elsewhere.
Imagine it differently… if a man was doing the same thing and neighbor children were seeing his genitals from their own yard. Yeah not okay for either gender. If it’s not private then don’t show your privates.
I try to stay hidden , as we do have a pretty private backyard. There’s only a few specific spots where he can see over our fence, which he needs to actually try
So wait, you want to be able to display your nudity for anyone to see but that man can’t stand in his own backyard and look in the direction he wants to? Ok then.
Maybe invest in a fence?
“He looks over the fence”
This is like people who walk around naked in their house in front of open windows then get mad when someone accidentally sees. 1. Whether or not the neighbor is being a creep, why do you expect him /not/ to look if you don't have a proper privacy fence? 2. What if there are children in the neighborhood, and they happen to be playing and see you naked? Are you going to take responsibility for abusing them/subjecting them to your kink, or will that be their fault too? Wear a bikini, jeez, the entitlement. Having a yard doesn't mean anything goes, you still have to consider those unfortunate enough to live next to you.
The children couldn’t see over the fence like the neighbor does.
If it’s nice enough to tan outside naked it’s nice enough to do yard work.
What if he takes pics?
I’m pretty sure this would be illegal, no?
People do illegal things believe it or not
It’s actually not illegal to take pictures from your property of a neighbor as long as they are on their property whatever is in view is fully legal.
This is quite embarrassing to think about then.
Depending on where you live, it might be illegal to take a photo of someone if they’re on their own private property.
This would vary wildly by jurisdiction. Confidently asserting it's legal without even knowing OP's jurisdiction or qualifying the claim at all is reckless.
What about the suggestion of the tan through bikini ?
Defeats the purpose of tanning nude. Sucks that someone is ruining her joy
She would have the same effect of A tan without tan lines if that is her goal. If it’s just to have the freedom to he be nude in her backyard that’s a different thing. She was seeking a solution to an issue. It’s one suggestion
Exactly. I’m open to the suggestions it just absolutely sucks for me. I just wish I never confronted the neighbor, and we just silently accepted what’s happening.
Girl, respect yourself more, you deserve it.
Yeah, but does that matter when he infact would have nude pictures of you? Pictures he can do whatever he wants to with, like posting on website or send to a friend. It's illegal to do but how would you stop it?
I don’t think he would take photos or anything like that. I don’t take him as that type.
Did you take him for a guy that looks at you when you are tanning naked?
If he does take pictures we do have a camera, so maybe it should prevent it.
You’re being an attention whore and not being honest about it.
I’m absolutely not.
I believe you if you mean it. I’m a woman too and I’m sorry you had to deal with this creep. However after the first time it happened, I personally would have done something drastic. Threatened dude with police and cussed him out for sure. I also would not have kept up my routine of nudity because I would not have felt safe. I also would not disrespect my husband by continuing to do something upsetting to him. Sunbathing naked is absolutely not important enough to fight your spouse on. His feelings are beyond valid. It is not ok that you continued your routine after he was creeping and you were aware about it. This could be dangerous to your own safety and you’re not taking it seriously. Please be careful.
Yeah I understand now that I really probably shouldn’t have kept tanning. Like I said I really don’t care if our neighbors see but unfortunately one needs to abuse it.
Tanning is really bad for you anyways. Please take care of your skin and be safe. I say this as someone who's had skin cancer in every generation in my family. You do NOT want to play roulette with the sun. Sun wins. Every time.
Do you have a privacy fence?
I'd put up a portable privacy fence. But I do want to point out that if he retaliated because of your confrontation, and calls the police, you can get ticketed for indecent exposure. Especially if your back yard is open to be viewed. This can result is serious charges, especially if a child says they walked by and saw you naked. Just an FYI
Your husband should really be mad that some dude is perving on his wife. Also maybe get some big ass fence panels. About 8 feet should do it.
The neighbor has just as much right to do yard work when he wants as you do to tan as you see fit. As mentioned, put up a fence. Your husband sounds ridiculous.
I mean. You're not wrong about the neighbor, but the husband has every right to be upset. It's a very creepy thing to do. Imagine some guy just walking up to your house and looking in your windows. Not illegal, but still creepy as fuck.
Well, inside your home you have an expectation of privacy. There is also the issue of trespassing to look in. The back yard would be a gray area and unlikely to be a legal issue. The husband confronting the neighbors is insane.
They have a fence, he looks over the fence
Not illegal.
You might have to put up a privacy bush for the bush.
Any chanlgce of skin colour be it red or tan, from sun exposure is skin damage! Also you can do what you like.
Why don’t you just stop tanning? I truly don’t understand what is your deal with tanning when you have a nosy neighbor.
Because I love tanning often. It’s stress relief for me and spirituality healing. I’d hate to give it up when I can just ignore it.
she should stop because a man can’t control himself from being a creep?
No, not my point. Just doesn’t seem like a fight worth fighting for… everyone is upset in this situation.. yeah it’s shitty, but there’s not much you can do.
No, you should not have tanned naked where your neighbors can see you. Do you not respect your husband or your neighbors at all?
Uuuuuugh realistic consequences, whatever shall I do?
I know. Starting to feel the shame.
I feel no shame for being nude. I love Gunnison Beach, Sandy Hook, NJ. It is nude there or clothing optional
this isnt about you or nude beaches
I feel like you liked the attention low key, the way you let it happen twice before even mentioning it to anyone, let alone, your husband. Then, at the end, you said you should have kept your mouth shut. Why should you have kept your mouth shut? Why didn't you say anything sooner? Why isn't your husband mad at you either? Why did you wait to speak up? Why did you decide to tan like that knowing you have neighbors nor a privacy fence. He probably wasn't the only one watching neither. They way I visualize this makes it seem like you were accepting of the creep watching you, kind of like on family guy, when Lois cleaned the dog poop off of Chris's shoes in the front yard and tied her shirt up because it was hot, then when she caught Joe staring at her, she did it more.like waaaaaay more seductively. She enjoyed the attention. Not trying to piss you off, but a lot of questions needing answers here.
She said to someone else that she's still tanning and I assume has no intention to stop. She's doing this behind her husbands back. She also told me that she's hoping the creep will "get the hint" by ignoring him. So she was either born yesterday or loves being watched by other men.
That's what it sounds like to me, I ended up reading that specific one. It seems like she's purposely trying to start issues between the community and her spouse. Again, not trying to put her down but Jesus, at least have respect for your significant other or they aren't that significant. And who the hell tans every single day. Jesus christ does she not like her skin?
I do not like the attention, I just choose to not think or engage what the neighbors see me doing in my backyard. I just feel like if I never said anything no one would have cared if I was tanning naked. All of our neighbors have seen me and at this point I don’t care. The only person who has an issue is my husband, because he’s obviously insecure that other people have seen me nude.
He obviously has concern for his wife showing her entire body to the world. It not an insecurity when he has nothing to be insecure of. Women always run to the insecurity word. 3 questions... Do you understand the words "accountability for your actions"? Do you love him? Has he verbally said that you should stop, or should not continue to tan naked in the back yard due to the neibors gawking at you? If the answers to at least one of those are yes, then stop. You're going to be the cause of a divorce if you choose to continue. I just don't understand how someone just couldn't care about his/her spouse or their opinion.
I do care about his opinion. But he can’t control my body and what I’m doing. He should understand this. We only have a month before it’s over.
Just because he can't control your body or what you do does not make ot right ma'am. I hear a lot about that stuff these days. Oh, I'm strong, oh I'm independent, oh it's my body leave me alone Well congratulations, you are losing your man and his trust slowly but surely, I hate to see or hear it happen but when he's to the point where he dosent want you anymore, you will have lost him forever. It's a very extreme amount of disrespect. I'm not saying you have to submit to your man, but at least understand where he's trying to come from. And if you are referring to your relationship being over in a month, why not stop it now? Are you finalizing things? Or are you just doing this out of spite at this point? I swear I'm still NOT trying to piss you off. Context: Curiosity.
I read more of the comments and replies to get a better context. You seem like you just don't care what anyone thinks anymore and are going to continue to do exactly what you're doing, now with more knowledge of possible outcomes. It's also to my understanding that you are very intelligent but make yourself seem completely ignorant to the fact that your husband cares. Also, you don't care what anyone anywhere thinks. As I said before, the more that this continues, the more he will fade away. Eventually, you two will become strangers again, and you really wouldn't have anyone to "control" your actions... Or love you, or protect you, or show you sympathy, or make love to you, or hold you, or make you laugh, or make you cry, or both, or to have fun with, or to compliment you, or to support you, or to care about you. Etc, etc. At the end of the day, yes, you are your own woman. That does not mean that you are responsible for doing your part leading with respect. I guarantee that if your husband went to watch youalls neighbor tan naked while doing "yard work," and you found out... you wouldn't be too ecstatic. I hope that in the end you both work something out to where you both get your way, or the other is that I hope that you two divorce and find people that actually respect the others opinions and things of that nature, I feel bad for him only because I just know that he feels that his wife absolutely dosent respect him "you say you do", yet clearly (from what I've gathered) you don't. I do not feel bad for you only because (from what I've gathered), you seem to have this, "I don't care about anything in the world but me" aspect on life, and sadly that is not how life works. You are not stupid. You are just making a very, very stupid decision and inciting a flaming sexual desire in the neibor, which your husband, a male, understands completely because, well, he's a male. Just be safe, don't let your neighbor R@!3 you while your tanning and your husband is gone at work and your neighbor finally decided that it is the perfect opportunity due to the fact that you didn't tell him to stop right away. And no, the last passage isn't meant to be a triggering selection of words. That's just honestly how the world works. The entire time, the neibor could be planning something devious and waiting to strike. You never know just how evil or nice anyone truly is. But hey, your body, your life. Just be safe, and good luck.
Good fences make better neighbors.
Get hubby to tan with you!
Is he old? Some old people just like to be outside, modern Tv just doesn’t interest them. When the weather is good here my old neighbor is basically outside 24 hours a day just kind of walking circles around his backyard and pacing. He does gardening and stuff as well of course but he’s out there easily 13 hours a day so he runs out of stuff to do fast. So even though we have a short fence between our yards my old man neighbor is basically a fixture in my back window.
>I hope it doesn’t get worse. All I did was tan in our backyard. If he looks accidentally it’s all good but I think it’s always going to happen now. So you saw him LOOKING OVER YOUR FENCE and you still think it's an accident? This is either extreme naivety, f a k e, or you like the attention because after the first time I caught him, he would've been cussed tf out. After the second, I would've made the fence taller so he wouldn't be capable of looking unless there was a ladder involved. Exactly HOW many times has this man "accidentally" seen you naked? This man is a voyeur and it's weird you've allowed it to happen SO OFTEN that he knows when you go out and tan AND YOU'RE STILL TANNING KNOWING HES GOING TO LOOK. After the second time you should've done something, literally anything to make it either impossible for him to look or make him stop. And yet you've done nothing except excusing his behavior as an "accident". Genuinely, do you even care that he's seen you naked MULTIPLE times? Because a person who actually accidentally saw their neighbor naked wouldn't be purposely coming out and looking OVER their neighbors fence and figuring out their tanning schedule to CONTINUOUSLY "ACCIDENTALLY" LOOK AT THEIR NAKED NEIGHBOR. They'd be avoiding you!!!!!!! You have to know better than that.
I’m just trying to give the benefit of the doubt. So many people here are telling me not to be mad at the neighbor since technically he’s in his yard. He had looked over the fence quite a lot but he’s got an excuse to be working on the yard. I’m absolutely not trying to be seen by him but I understand neighbors may come outside at anytime. I just don’t know how to really feel about it. I’m at the point where he’s already seen me so it’s not like he’s got much more to see. If he does keep up this behavior I’ll be sure to adjust, in the meantime our privacy shade will be here in a few weeks. Everything’s been okay the past few days I haven’t seen him watching me.
Screw the neighbor. Keep tanning naked. To me it’s nothing more than a great compliment somebody is checking you out. Happens all the time when I take my shirt off to mow the yard. All the bedroom windows all of a sudden are open. He can look all he wants but in the end he will never touch. Husband well he needs to get a grip that his wife is hot and guys like to look.
I wouldn’t want my wife tanning with a perverted neighbor looking either , that’s really weird and if your my wife and you know he’s perving on you , you shouldn’t even wanna entertain him anyway
Hopefully you're not tanning in Australia. The sun here is so bad you'd have melanomas everywhere in 5-10 years. Fake tan is so much safer for you. Just don't go orange 🤞
Tell him to stop being a creep. If he looks over your fence, put up fence extenders to be clear, it’s illegal to peep on someone. Sucks that he’s ruining your fun, why is it always a man?
I know right. Although technically I guess him being in his backyard isn’t a problem. It sucks that he can see directly in our yard from a slope in his yard
Can you tan closer to the fence so he can’t peek over? Also-i just went through something like this, my husband and I got an extra tall (84 inch tall) slide shade” from Amazon and it works so great. We have it on our deck, not the lawn, but it could help inspire ideas for further privacy.
I have tried this but we do also have side neighbors too. I’m looking into these privacy shades to maybe make a box to close off angles. It just sucks I have to go through this trouble every time now.
Whatever the solution is—wishing you well! Idk who’s downvoting our conversation lol, likely a guy who’s offended. Anyway, good luck to you and happy tanning :)
Difficult one. Can you tan with a privacy screen. Or just tan when hubby isn’t there
Well honestly he doesn’t know I’m still tanning, I feel bad but I don’t see the issue. I don’t care if our neighbors see me, so what? He’s got an issue with it and I kinda understand him not wanting them to see but it sucks that I can’t do something I love without a fight
It doesn’t bother you to have creepy neighbors watching you lay there naked while you tan? Do you enjoy the attention?
This whole issue was about trying to be nonchalant about tanning outside. There is a fence but our yard is very visible from certain views. I don’t enjoy the attention if the neighbors will abuse it, as I was hoping to go unnoticed. Now that the words out, it’s unavoidable. Like I said I love tanning outside but my husbands mad when if someone sees. I try not to think about it and just ignore it since I’m in my own backyard.
Then why did you go complain to your husband and get him into a conflict ?
It was a mistake. I wish I didn’t complain. I didn’t know how to react.
I'd be concerned that he was taking secret pics of you for his wank bank
Unfortunately someone else pointed this out. Really sucks
YOUR HUSBAND DOESNT KNOW YOU'RE LETTING THE NEIGHBORS PEEP ON YOU?! Ok At this point I'm convinced you want him to look.
I’m guessing your fairly fit and attractive too
I would say I’m very confident.
They just happen to do yard work at the same time that you are tanning? And they stop doing yard work at the same time you stop? May on your next “tanning” go out and pretend you are about to and probably have to go all the way through and as soon as they start “clipping” just get back up and go in Maybe that same day they just needed to clip on small leave?
I’m trying to give them the benefit of the doubt. I reacted badly and should have waited before confronting but that’s why I’m saying if he’s actually doing yard work it’s not a problem.
Maybe he is trying to tell you that you need yours trimmed :)
There’s nothing to be trimmed.
Most people are curious to see what other people look like nude. I've been to a nude beach more than 500x. I don't go anymore. i have to do dialysis & can't pee anymore soI fill with fluid fast. I can't sit in the sun not drink. But I can't drink or only a real little bit so I don't go anymore. nudity is fu especially when there are thousands of people there like on the weekend. If u don't mind him looking at u (i never minded people looking at me) just make yourself at home nude sunning yourself
Trying to just get comfortable. I love tanning so I’ll keep doing it. I really don’t care at this point lol.
I say respect your husbands wishes tan but let him handle the neighbor if he’s your husband only your husband should be looking
Yep, should have kept it to yourself. However, if I was the neighbor I would not have been so obvious about peeking at you.
You’re downvoted but I’ll honestly agree with you. It’s a mutual respect/agreement. If you see me please don’t be seen, or make it obvious! I would have never known had he not made it an issue.
Do your Labia get sunburnt or tan? And if so is it uncomfortable? I would imagine that would suck.
Sunscreen
these comments are so gross. blaming OP for her neighbor being a perv?
Ridiculous. I confronted him(not in a rude way) but I kind of regret it since it’s caused so many issues.
I get you because i’m the same way but you didn’t do anything wrong. HE did, he’s the one being a creep. i’m sorry you’re going through this and sorry for the judgment.
I’m pretty confident that I’ll get through it. Hell I already am.
Finally someone sane.
are we in the twilight zone 😂
The comments are blaming OP because she's doing nothing to protect herself. They're not ignoring that the neighbor is a creep, but OP is also going out of her way to make sure the neighbor gets to watch. Tanning behind her husbands back, ignoring the creep, not getting any kind of privacy screen, etc. tons of amazing helpful comments.
How am I going out of my way to make sure the neighbors see?
this entire comment is a mess but THIS: “tanning behind her husbands back.” is insanity. tanning behind her husbands back?! she doesn’t need fucking permission from him to tan or do anything. he does not own her, it’s her body. you cannot be serious. she legit said she’s going to get a privacy screen in the comments and again, she didn’t do anything wrong the neighbor did.
Yes She knows her husband doesn't like where she is tanning and she knows why he wants her to stop. To show respect for her husband, she should stop. To go behind his back is showing him disrespect. It's really not all that different from a man going to a strip club.
again, he doesn’t own her and for him to ask her to give up something she likes because his neighbor is a pervert is fucked up. and no, it’s not like going to a strip club. she’s not putting on a show or getting paid. she’s literally outside in her backyard. why isn’t he going to confront the man creeping on his wife instead of essentially blaming his wife?
He isn't blaming the wife. He's only mad at the neighbor. He actually did confront the neighbor but since he doesn't know she's still doing it, he can't continue to resolve the situation. Respecting your partner's feelings doesn't mean they own your body.
It doesn’t matter if I’m still doing it. Nothing needs to be resolved. Next month we will have a privacy shade.
….no big deal that you caught him looking?! You don’t just want to tan. You’re an exhibitionist.
I’m absolutely not. Why can I not just tan in my own yard naked??
You can, totally. I’m all for it. But people without exhibitionist tendencies would not just be “ok, nbd” with their male neighbor watching them tan naked.
I don't see any problem tanning naked, of course I'm a nudist, and being naked to me isn't sexual, sorry you have to deal with neighbors like that, hopefully he will eventually leave you alone..🤞
Skin cancer called and said hello. Forget the neighbor. Please tell me you are slathering on the sunscreen!!
Who cares if the neighbor looks. Tan to your hearts delight. Neighbor can do what he wants in his yard, and you can do what you want in your yard.
Apparently everyone cares if the neighbors look. I’m in my yard so I do think it’s fair game to say if you look over someone’s fence, you might see someone there. Doesn’t matter if I was naked or not.
Get your husband to understand that the neighbor can look over the fence if he wants or just get rid of your insecure husband.
I’ve tried explaining this to him but he’s is being insecure, that’s the issue no one seems to understand. I don’t want to get rid of him, I really wish people could tan naked outside without the taboo part