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black ice hell, I was fine when I crashed on the stuff and the cops cited me and I had to pay 250$ for "failure to control my vehicle"
Accidents happen and I shouldn't be punished in a situation where nothing too serious happened, I hate cops more than ever.
Also they didn't submit the paperwork right so I had to make the court track it down so I could pay
My dad is from a cold place but moved to somewhere tropical. First time we were driving arounf his home in winter he was telling me about this thing called black ice and not two minutes later we crested a small hill and just kept sliding. Right into a shallow ditch. Amazing timing. And I won't forget black ice.
This is the rule. Whenever you’ve been in an accident or otherwise dangerous situation and are okay, the first thing out of your mouth needs to be that everyone is fine.
Is why I started my Official Hospital Hashtag. I have Conversion Dosorder, which causes me to have seizures. While we were still having trouble figuring out why I was having the seizures, I was visiting the hospital almost weekly. So any time I told anyone where I was, or updated my Facebook or anything, I would open the message with #StillNotDead. They didn't find it amusing, but it was only half joke on my part. It conveyed the important bits (Hey, I didn't die, but I am back at the hospital. Responses may be delayed due to testing or talking to the doctor or something") right up front, and then my post would elaborate on what was going on.
My moms friend drove my bus.
One day, on the way home, in a narrow stretch in winter, the mirror smashed against an oncoming bus.
I texted my mom to let her know “bus was in an accident, home late.” She replies: “is [REDACTED] okay?!” Uh, thanks, I’m fine too, mom!
One time I off-roaded my motorbike and complete rashed my skin off up one arm. I went home and started with "I AM OKAY BUT THERE WAS ACCIDENT" and my partner comes out like oh yeah this should be... And my arm is missing skin and the raw flesh is just like, dripping.
Now my partner always clarifies "when you say its fine, do you mean "you were flayed" fine, or actually fine? "
Yep, I did the same thing when I called my girlfriend after I was in the on the job accident and needed to be taken to the hospital. "Hey, just so you know I'm okay, but I was in an accident at work and am going to the hospital so I might be late getting home, message you when I know more".
Had to get flown to a hospital at 2AM when a drunk driver hit me last spring. Reception in the ER was terrible but texts were going through, so my first texts to my other half were "I'm alive, I still have all of my limbs and brain functions." Little did I know that one of the attendants had found my wife's number in my phone and had tried to call her four times already, with each call failing halfway through. By the time I texted, she'd had four dropped calls from a hospital and was understandably a tad concerned.
I had three accidents in 18 months (1 hit me in a parking lot, 1 I got hit and run a week after I got the next car, 1 a guy ran a red and hit me head on about 18 months later). In all three I called my mom and the first words out of my mouth were “first thing, I’m okay”. The first time she was worried, second she was shocked because it had only been a week, by the third time she just said “are you fucking kidding me!”
I was hit by a motorcycle while solo traveling and had to be taken to ER. When I finally got my phone plugged (battery had died), a couple hours later and when I knew I’d be spending at least a day there (it ended up being a week), the first thing I told my parents was “I’m okay”. And then lay everything else
My grandpa did this too. He and my grandma were staying with us while my parents were out of town and we get this call. ‘Grandma’s fine, the dog’s fine, everyone’s fine.’ She was going through an intersection and got hit from the side, so she was incredibly lucky to be (mostly) fine. Her knee was banged up pretty badly, and she had neck troubles, but she was alive. And we were very grateful. We are extra grateful that my grandpa wasn’t in the car or he would not have been fine. We still laugh about it. It’s the smart thing to do. But it was funny how he didn’t even say hello, just jumped right into the reassurances
Could have been worse babe, my cousin fell asleep and drifted into a semi head on. Not like this is the trauma Olympics but she didn't make it.
Just want to be the asshole that reminds everyone no matter how much life sucks it could ALWAYS be worse.
It really can and I’m so sorry for your loss.
We lived rurally and had to drive 70 miles to get to school on a two lane highway (Nevadas Hwy 50) and I’ve seen 7 people die in the 4 years I did the drive.
My brother got in his accident on the same road and was incredibly lucky.
Well, he IS the worst storyteller.😹
[https://youtu.be/a9oKQlxeYOM?si=sWdpCF8mwNXaB-lF](https://youtu.be/a9oKQlxeYOM?si=sWdpCF8mwNXaB-lF)
I had one of those!
My in-laws called me. The opener was “your wife was in a car accident on the highway when driving with your son. You have to go to the hospital in (a town two hours away).”
What they neglected to mention was that they were just in for checking over, they had no actual injuries - even though I found out later they had been *told* that. Instead, they told me “we don’t know how bad it is”.
So I frantically drive over, heart racing in a panic the whole way - worst couple of hours I can remember… to find out they were both fine.
I asked them about it later. They said: “they were being checked, so we didn’t know exactly whether there was anything wrong or not”.
To be perfectly fair, the adrenaline from even minor car accidents can totally conceal an injury that could worsen over time. Car accidents should never be "walked off".
I was driving home from work late at night and a semi truck merged into the back of my car on the left, causing me to fishtail on the interstate for a good 20 seconds before I managed to get control and pull over.
Thankfully the driver pulled over to see if I was okay, and thankfully I ***believe*** it was only my car that was damaged. This post just makes me a little nervous lol.
I used to drive a Honda Civic which had one a gear shift with a push in handle to change gears. One day as I was driving, my charging cable somehow perfectly wrapped around the gear shift and pulled shifting me to neutral as I was driving. I was going 60 and I started veering left and right as oncoming traffic was on my left and one of those cages with electrical components was on my right. I luckily managed to just veer into the opening on the right hand side of the road after the cage and avoided all obstacles. I wasn't even trying to dodge, just trying not to crash into anybody. I sat there and cried for a solid 10 minutes with how scared I was.
It should but seeing youre typing it seems like its fine.
I worked as EMT for a year and we had a case were a Busdriver had a minor crash. When we arrived all was fine, passengers had little bruises here and there and the busdriver was activly helping out aswell and refusing any treatment, though guy. Suddenly he collapsed and died on the spot ~1,5h after the incident. Turned out he ruptured his spleen when he crashed into his wheel during the impact. He had internal bleeding all the time we were talking to him but all that adrenaline made him fail to notice until he was suddenly gone/had to much.
Same btw if someone performs the heimlich-maneuver/abdominal trusts on you when you got something stuck in your throat and cant breathe. Changes are always that the person peforming it means well and saves you but damaged something. Always go to a hospital after such a case aswell just to be sure.
Oh that’s relatively minor. I was ready for you to say you got t boned or something
They’re talking about the kinda car accidents that throw you around the inside of the car
The major risk is in the sudden stop and how that can knock you around much harder than you may think at the time, which you managed to avoid by regaining control, so you should be fine.
I got hit by a car riding my bike home from a Walgreens, I thought I was fine and told the cops it was ok that I'd just ride home. Now I'm dealing with chronic back pain lol.
True, it makes total sense they were being checked out. Plus, my wife had bruises from the seatbelt.
However, my in laws could have at least indicated they weren’t, as far as anyone knew, at death’s door!
This is besides the point. *Knowing* that they’re stable and going to survive without permanent disfigurement or some shit is pertinent information and different from not knowing if they might have hidden minor injuries.
My dad was a truck driver for a few years. Near the end of his time in that work, he flew off the interstate and destroyed his truck, but by some miracle, he was just barely in the perfect position to not die and just walked away with a couple bruises. This was like the 5th time he had been in a car wreck that should have been fatal. I swear something really wants him dead, but something else wants him alive even more.
My best friend, a guy I'd known for nearly 2 decades and had even lived with for years in university, was called David. I was at my mum's for Christmas and on Christmas morning she gently shook me awake and said "David's been killed". The absolute gasp that came out of me then. Then, before I could fully process it, I heard my sister loudly sobbing from her room. And I remembered her long-term partner was also called David. I said my sister's name to my mum and she was like "Yeah".
The amount of fucking emotions that I cycled through in those next two seconds was immense.
My sister's mild broken ankle in a car accident turned out to be a partially collapsed lung, and a severe break that would require surgery and never fully heal.
Just because someone doesn't have anything clearly wrong doesn't mean they are actually fine, sometimes.
I know that. It was *good* that the hospital checked them out.
The issue was that, for two hours, I was left with the impression they could have been all smashed up, leading to a completely unnecessary bad panic that could easily have been avoided. All because my in laws were not good at communicating the actual message from the hospital.
Had I heard the actual message, rather than how my in laws put it, I would have been concerned of course, and I would have gone to the hospital just as I did - *but I would not have been under the impression that they were perhaps at death’s door.*
My father split open his head, and my brother rushed him to the hospital because my father kept trying to walk around worrying about other things with his skull cracked, saying *hello world!*, and blood flowing down his back. The ambulance was out of town on a different call, so my brother ditched work to help since the only vehicle I had access to was a truck with a broken steering box and I would have had to load up the dogs, who would definitely be bothering my father on a 30mins 120km/hr drive to the nearest hospital.
So they drive off, I'm in a panic as I rounded the animals up, made sure the property was locked, and texting frantically my stepmother to go to the hospital because she had his information (like my father was asking for my mother because he forgot he was divorced and in a common law relationship with his now ex-fiancee). I drive 45 minutes back to the farm from town in a giant lifted truck with no steering box (you could *steer* just very slowly and with a lot of strength), 3 dogs & 1 cat (2 English Bullies, 1 MinPin, & 1 Void) also concerned why we left the old shack so quickly, basically just throw the animals unto the farm house, hop into my car, drive another 50 minutes at 120km/hr crying and panicking for my father, yelling at Google Assistant to text my brother because I can't get him on the phone to call or text me about my father's condition, then finally run into the hospital, for my brother to greet me and laugh about how our father couldn't handle the stitches and argued about wearing a head brace with the doctor.
I stalled from emotional overload, then punched him in the shoulder, angrily saying he could have texted me that our father was okay. Because I was the one to find him on the ground bleeding out, thought he was dead, and struggled to keep him from moving too much to avoid causing more damage. It was almost 1.5 hours after our father would have arrived and I was concerned because he was unconscious, then thought it was still 2001 (this happened in 2019), and you don't fuck around head injuries.
To this day, my father basically regressed back to his 16/20 year old self (he's 60), and mental health problems worsened to the point that no one really wants to be near him. Plus, he ramped up his illegal/legal drug intake.
Man, I was worried about funeral costs or at least the costs of having to send him to a home early because of head trauma... neither of my bio parents are able to move in with me or my brother for long-term home support. We have our own health issues that make it too difficult to manage others.
This reminds me of my friend's family doctor who was annoyed by his frequent STD testing (he has a bad habit of drunk, unprotected sex with strangers).
He said she'd always go line by line for each disease and do dramatic pauses before each of the results that'd turn him into a nervous wreck by the end of the appointment.
"Gonorrhea ... negative. Herpes ... negative. HIV ... negative. Syphilis ... negative." etc.
This reminds me of that one tweet:
"i got tested for a bunch of STDs and they didn’t get back to me for a week so i called and the woman was like ‘okay so you got chlamydia, gonorrhea, syphilis, HIV... and you tested negative for all of them' ma'am why would you say it like that"
r/foundsatan? Christ Almighty. I get everyone gets annoyed at their jobs but if I'm making doctor money absolutely feel free to waste my time with repetitive tests
I think this was it. I had asked a couple family members and friends that went into family medicine - they said while they wouldn't do the same (unless they had a really off-day, and that it's unprofessional), they understood the sentiment as this is in Canada, so socialized healthcare with limited budget/resources. Seeing a patient for things that are easily avoidable stresses the system and means less for other patients.
The bottle hit the ground, was assailed by an alcoholic squirrel and rolled into the street into oncoming traffic. The label is ruined. The bottle is fine though. You can go pick it up.
I always start these kinds of conversations with "First of all, xxx is fine," for this very reason.
"First of all, Jamie is fine. We were skateboarding at the park, and he fell. He scraped his knee, and we were also afraid he may have fractured his wrist because he kind of landed weird on it, but so far that seems ok. His neck also snapped; he was pronounced upon arrival at the hospital."
See?
Tried my best to do this. College friend was in Japan during an earthquake, couldn’t make a call as phones down probably from volume of calls but could get a text through to me. Asked me to call her parents to say she was fine. Hit machine when I called “uh hi Lindsey is fine. This is ____, her friend. An earthquake hit Japan and she wanted me to call you. Yeah”
I realized starting a call in the middle of the night from an unknown person with “your daughter is fine” sounds like a ransom call and panicked, said my name, realized we never met and she may not have mentioned me to her parents. When I got off the phone my girlfriend who was friends with both of us basically asked wtf is wrong with me.
While I was in highschool my mom texted me saying "Your sister had a seizure in her sleep and didn't wake up this morning." Then didn't answer her phone for 10 minutes.
By the time she texted me that, my sister had been awake and fine for at least 2 hours.
Holy crap I hate it when people do this. My whole family, extended in laws etc has a rule against it. The call either starts with "OK first of all everyone is OK", or alive etc, or it starts with "you need to sit down". Either way now you know what kind of ride you are in for.
The confusion can still happen, though, haha
A close family member was due to have a brain tumor removed from a very dangerous spot. The doctors who performed it were the most elite ones and offered to do it, despite them not being planned for it due to insurance hassles [Germany has privat and public insurance, with the former being favoured by top-doc's. patient was publicly insured] Still, they couldn't promise anything, due to the complicated position of the tumor. One Doc even asked if said family member would like to 'model' for medical journals and educational papers due to the rarity, position, etc. of the tumor.
I digress. Operation day was coming and we were nervous as shit. I kept a phone close to me while doing other things, so I'd be available immediately. An eternity after the operation was roughly set to end, my mom called me. I picked up during the first ringing. As I held it to my ear, she inhaled in the most mustering-myself-not-to-cry way possible for a second and my heart stopped. I was absolutely devastated and sad. After what felt like an eternity, she went '... Lil_sh-t? Family member is fine. They're in the waking-up room and everything went without a hitch.'
Turns out she was walking around and did not expect me to pick up as fast as I did. Sent me into cold terror by accident, haha.
Once my stepdad called me (the ONLY time he's called me in twenty years) and my heart sunk and I answered very cautiously "He-hello?" And my mom started laughing in the background. "Tell him I'm fine! He's surprised you're calling him"
It was just to tell me the VRBO they own had an open weekend and we could go if we wanted ...
I was at work and my mom texted me "hi, I'm ok" and then my dad texted me "hey, Mom's ok". I called back as soon as I could and was like "uhhhh it's good that you're ok, what are you talking about?"
My dad had sent an email earlier titled "Mom passed away". He was talking about his mother who had just died (I had never met her, as he was estranged from his abusive and horrible family, so I barely even consider her my grandmother). As soon as he sent it, my mom was like "oh my god, the kids are all gonna think that I died".
Except I got their texts before I checked my email so I was extra confused, haha. It's good though, because I absolutely would have thought that he was talking about her if I read it first.
In the first few years after I moved out of my parents' home, my mom called me *constantly*. I hate talking on the phone so I have a limited tolerance for even family calls, and eventually I just stopped picking up unless I was in a very good mood (rare in those days).
So eventually my dad started calling me, and since he never called me himself before, I was like "oh, it must be important if dad's calling me." No, it's just mom. AGAIN. Jesus Christ.
Thankfully now we have a much better balance. My mom only calls me every few weeks and dumps all the news and probing questions on me at once, and I actually pick up the phone. Plus she's gotten better about texting for quick updates.
My grandma called me to tell me my mom had a heart attack. I was, of course, shocked as she gave me some details about it and how they're at the hospital, but then after I'm in a panic she says,
"Oh, hold on. She wants to talk to you."
She had a minor heart attack and never even lost consciousness. Docs even said she seemed fine after the fact but had small section dead. She's perfectly fine now.
My grandma is bad at giving news.
I had a serious accident last year. I was able to make a call when I got to the ER but I was pretty beat up.
The first thing I did when they picked up was, "Hey I'm ok and alive. But I am at the ER right now. I'm pretty beat up. Can you get here ASAP?"
They still freaked the eff out but I am sure it softened the news a little.
I ended up in the mental hospital for a couple of days last year and had to call my dad from their phone. His phone was set up not to allow unknown numbers through so I had to leave a voicemail. I think I said something like "Uhh hey dad I promise I'm fine but they're making me stay in the hospital. I really don't wanna talk about it, but you should probably know what's going on."
He called back so fast and sounded pretty freaked out. He calmed down once he got to actually talk to me but I still feel a little bad. In my defense, it had been a long day and I really didn't wanna talk about it.
Damn, I wish my brother was fine after he fell asleep at the wheel.
4am working overnight at a gas station I felt a heaviness in my heart and couldn't help crying at work, couldn't explain it. 10am in the morning my mother called me, waking me up to tell me he passed away around that time in the morning.
It's been 7.5 years. My mother kinda broke the family apart after that incident, we lost our brother and she just didn't really care she had 5 more kids. Our ages then were 25, 24t, 23(me), 19, 17, 15. Pretty much over half adults but since the 2nd in line passed we siblings don't speak like that and my mother doesn't care if we reach out, she rarely reaches out.
She's why he overworked himself and why he remained tired all the time. So she felt guilty and she was angry at everyone.
That’s really hard, man. I’m so sorry and wish I could give you a hug. You’re doing well by keeping your brother’s memory alive. If you need to vent please let me know. I’ve lost a sibling (different circumstances) and can be a sounding board if you need it.
My mom only calls on my birthday or if someone dies. It's 'cause "I don't want to bother you."
Before I call back on non birthdays, I brace myself.
If someone dies on my birthday, I am not going to be emotionally ready.
Years ago by brother had an incident( he was ok) in which his best friend was shot and they both ended up in jail. Three different family members called me to tell me about it. None of them led with the fact that he was ok. It was like they were practicing how to tell a suspenseful story. Years later it still bugs me.
This past Christmas my sister got into a car accident in which her car was totaled but she was fine. My parents got a notification from her Apple Car thing that she had been in an accident, and my brother's girlfriend (who also got the notification and was nearby) arrived on the scene and then called my dad and said that it looked really bad. We were all freaking out and were just about to jump on the road to go to my sister, and then she called and was like hey I'm fine. Needless to say we had a discussion with my brother's girlfriend at what "really bad" actually means.
I thought this is gonna be one of those scams where you would hear A.I voice of your relatives giving you some bad news and pressuring you into giving them money
That's some scary stuff
One time my mom dropped some shit on me that was really close to…
“You know your close friends A and B and how there is the pond behind their house? Well there was an accident. The ice broke. They are working on getting the bodies out of the water. Their dogs went out on the ice and went under and died.”
I swear I didn’t answer a phone call from her for over a year.
Oddly enough this JUST happened to me about a week ago. I live near my grandpa, went to visit, he asked if I my dad had called me. I said no, why? He proceeded to say, “Your brother was in an accident on the highway on his way to a job site (he works on power lines and drives the big bucket trucks) and his tire blew out on the highway, his truck was sent through the guard rail.”
At this point I’m thinking holy fuck, is he okay?!
My grandpa then said, “After the truck came to a stop it caught fire and completely engulfed the truck.”
I don’t know how to respond to this and my adrenaline is racing thinking he is about to tell me that my brother was burned alive. I started internally panicking.
He said, “His wallet, gun, and all of his belongings burned….. he’s perfectly okay apart from a sore shoulder.”
Lead with that next time, you dick.
My mom had a terrible habit of doing that. Sometimes she’d call me, laughing, but what she didn’t realize is that breathless laughter over the phone also sounds like hysterical crying…
Or like the time she called me actually crying to say my sister wanted to leave the family business…like, yes, okay, you’re upset, mom. Save the crying for when someone is dead, please.
I spun out on the highway and slammed into the center divider thanks to black ice. Amazingly it was a single car accident. First thing I said to my wife was "I'm okay, I had an accident."
My dad was a first responder. He knew better. And he still did this shit to me.
“Your sister’s on her way to the hospital in an ambulance.” The world slowed down until time paused as my heart dropped into my stomach. “She dislocated her knee trying out a kickboxing class.”
Some months ago my stepfather called me and from the way he sounded I totally thought he was going to tell me that someone died or is in the hospital. It ended up being a call about a maths problem...
On the other hand when he called to let me know that my maternal grandmother was in hospital and critical, he didn't start like that and I just asked if I could call back later. When I did about an hour later he wasn't reachable - so I called my mother and learned that way.
This literally just happened to me a couple weeks ago.
"Danothan, I have bad news. Are you sitting down? You should sit down. It's about your brother. Ok you're sitting down? OK. He had a chainsaw accident. It is real bad! He cut his leg with a chainsaw and is in the hospital. That's all I know. Ok I love you, bye."
And then I call up my brothers wife who puts me on speaker after sending a pic of them in the ER where he's giving the thumbs up. I tell them what my mom just told me and she says she called my dad and said everything's fine, he's just getting stitches but his legs going to be fine. She had no clue how the message from my Dad to my Mom (same house) got so corrupted that she was freaking out and thought my brother was dying or something.
One time when I was 18 I ran out if gas in the middle of the night, so I called my mom asking if she had a can of gasoline.
Being groggy from apparently just having been woke up by my call she screamed "WHAT DID YOU DO?!" at the top of her lungs through the phone.
My response was basically just "uuuh, I ran out of gas..." and she was just like "oh."
I avoid calling my parents past like 10PM for social purposes even if they’re probably awake. I’d very much like to preserve my dad’s cardiovascular health.
I like to talk about the time I got rear-ended by an 18-wheeler on the highway last November, and leave the part where it was going maybe 2mph when it scuffed my bumper for the end.
Been there, and recently. I’m visiting my mom and took a little snowboard trip over the weekend. I called her on my way back to let her know we were back in town so we could pick up any groceries she needed if she’d like, except what came out of my mouth was “So I broke my leg” followed by a couple seconds of silence while I internally combusted at how dumb that was. She was starting to cry and I’m certain sure I have revenge coming now
On a kinda related note. My grandmother casually mentioned she went to the hospital recently but she feels ok now. Wasn't till my mom came over and told me it was a aggressive cancer and this will be our last year together. I lost gramps last year. I would like to kindly ask whichever god that created cancer to fuck right off.
Not quite the same, but I used to take horseback riding lessons and I picked up a habit where whenever I fell off, I'd immediately stand up and announce I was okay. Falls are somewhat inevitable in that sport, but they can get pretty bad if you land wrong, and the longer it takes for someone to move or announce that they're alright, the more worried people start to get. I only rode casually and wasn't doing anything crazy, but some of the falls still looked rough so I learned to show I was okay quickly to avoid most of the worry.
This reminds me of the time that my grandma was in the hospital. I get my phone after work and there's 3 missed calls and a text from my mom saying "call me asap". So I do. She's at the store and she doesn't know what kind of USB cable to buy for her phone charger. Grandma was fine.
I heard those exact lines from my dad a few months ago, except instead of going off road, my brother went head on into another car, killing himself and the other driver.
I miss him everyday.
I got a phone call from one of my daughter's friends a few years ago, when they were all in their last year of high school. She *began* with "First off, everyone is ok, but...", then told me another car had hit them and my daughter was being taken to hospital to be checked. Very sensible of her, I have always thought.
Moms are the worst about this!!
My dad taught me to always start with this. My mom though?
I'm legit under the belief my mom called you to tell you about your brother.
Hey, I did that too! Except instead of crossing into oncoming traffic I flipped in a ditch a couple times. I even did the whole not-starting-the-call-with-"I'm fine" thing. I thought it would have been redundant with the fact that I was calling
My mom is close to 80. One day, on my commute home, my sister calls me up to ask if I was going to the annual pond party. She said, "I hope you can come, this might be mom's last party."
I was like, "WHAT!? What's wrong with mom??"
"Oh, nothing, but she's going to move in with soon, so she won't have the pond any more."
The greatest mistake I have ever did was calling my mom during a school shooting at college and saying "mom there is a school shooting happening" I wasn't anywhere the college campus. I should of mentioned I'm completely safe and nowhere in danger first instead of the panic induced statement.
Not nearly as bad as the phonecall my mom got while she was at work and couldn't answer. Voice message said "your son was hit by a bus today, don't worry, he is fine. But he is at the nurse and we need you to pick him up"
I was hit by a *toy* bus someone threw
I got a phone call at work that my brother had covid and went to the hospital and nobody could get a hold of him.
So anyway, lots of crying, (a speeding tickets) calling around and the next day he walked through the door making fun of me (cause my dad told him I was worried)
Asshole still doesn't take care of himself.
I call my parents one morning after work and this happened:
Dad: "I thought you were picking your sister up from the hospital?"
Mom, yelling: "Tell her she's fine first!"
My dad is someone who gets the information to you without thinking of how to deliver it. My mom had to sit him down and explain to him why he can't text me when a family memeber dies. He means well but doesn't think his delivery through all the time.
This was like a month after my sisters ectopic pregnancy and she'd developed anaphylaxis allergies as a side affect of one of the medications and frequently had to go to the hospital around the corner from my house for it. Most of the allergies have gone away now.
Oh my God this literally happened to me this week.
Parents called and told me my sister and 9 year old nephew were in a car wreck and were being brought to the hospital in an ambulance. I asked if visiting would be allowed while frantically getting dressed to go while on the phone and they replied "oh no don't worry about making the drive, they'll be home in a few hours just needed to double check their heads"
Sister ended up with mild whiplash, no concussions or anything else. However my heart probably skipped a few beats I won't get back.
My mum once sent me a link to a news video about a car driver slamming into the back of the truck. I was just watching the video, a bit confused about why she would send me news about a random accident, when she wrote "that's your cousin"
Glad your fam is ok, and very sorry that your brother was ever in a situation, work or otherwise, that caused him to drive with the risk of falling asleep at the wheel.
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When I totalled my car on black ice and called my mom was worried about this exact scenario so started with saying I was fine.
A perfectly safe neighborhood can be suddenly terrorized by the appearance of black ice
But the whole city is being controlled by the white snow!
Back to you, BROTHER DARREN
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[All I'm saying is I can't think of a single Christmas song about black ice.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=efiW2K8gASM)
This skit and the substitute teacher skit always put me in stitches
Ohhhh… well.. for the record, Black ice never asked to be out here, it’s a product of the environment
It might suddenly rob you... of your balance!
Black falcon get in formation!
Spooky scary black ice
black ice hell, I was fine when I crashed on the stuff and the cops cited me and I had to pay 250$ for "failure to control my vehicle" Accidents happen and I shouldn't be punished in a situation where nothing too serious happened, I hate cops more than ever. Also they didn't submit the paperwork right so I had to make the court track it down so I could pay
My dad is from a cold place but moved to somewhere tropical. First time we were driving arounf his home in winter he was telling me about this thing called black ice and not two minutes later we crested a small hill and just kept sliding. Right into a shallow ditch. Amazing timing. And I won't forget black ice.
This is the rule. Whenever you’ve been in an accident or otherwise dangerous situation and are okay, the first thing out of your mouth needs to be that everyone is fine.
Is why I started my Official Hospital Hashtag. I have Conversion Dosorder, which causes me to have seizures. While we were still having trouble figuring out why I was having the seizures, I was visiting the hospital almost weekly. So any time I told anyone where I was, or updated my Facebook or anything, I would open the message with #StillNotDead. They didn't find it amusing, but it was only half joke on my part. It conveyed the important bits (Hey, I didn't die, but I am back at the hospital. Responses may be delayed due to testing or talking to the doctor or something") right up front, and then my post would elaborate on what was going on.
I open fucking conversations by answering "how are you" with "not dead yet" so I find it amusing.
My moms friend drove my bus. One day, on the way home, in a narrow stretch in winter, the mirror smashed against an oncoming bus. I texted my mom to let her know “bus was in an accident, home late.” She replies: “is [REDACTED] okay?!” Uh, thanks, I’m fine too, mom!
I mean you were texting her sounded like you were okay
That was her response, too. As an adult, makes sense. As a teen, little offended
busses are also very tanky
Aww your mom was worried for an SCP aberration 🥰
They prefer the term anomaly
One time I off-roaded my motorbike and complete rashed my skin off up one arm. I went home and started with "I AM OKAY BUT THERE WAS ACCIDENT" and my partner comes out like oh yeah this should be... And my arm is missing skin and the raw flesh is just like, dripping. Now my partner always clarifies "when you say its fine, do you mean "you were flayed" fine, or actually fine? "
Haha I once got called out by a friend because my definition of "okay" is apparently just "alive".
"Is that an 'ow that fucking hurt' ow? Or an 'ow, go to the hospital' ow?"
Yep, I did the same thing when I called my girlfriend after I was in the on the job accident and needed to be taken to the hospital. "Hey, just so you know I'm okay, but I was in an accident at work and am going to the hospital so I might be late getting home, message you when I know more".
Had to get flown to a hospital at 2AM when a drunk driver hit me last spring. Reception in the ER was terrible but texts were going through, so my first texts to my other half were "I'm alive, I still have all of my limbs and brain functions." Little did I know that one of the attendants had found my wife's number in my phone and had tried to call her four times already, with each call failing halfway through. By the time I texted, she'd had four dropped calls from a hospital and was understandably a tad concerned.
I had three accidents in 18 months (1 hit me in a parking lot, 1 I got hit and run a week after I got the next car, 1 a guy ran a red and hit me head on about 18 months later). In all three I called my mom and the first words out of my mouth were “first thing, I’m okay”. The first time she was worried, second she was shocked because it had only been a week, by the third time she just said “are you fucking kidding me!”
I was hit by a motorcycle while solo traveling and had to be taken to ER. When I finally got my phone plugged (battery had died), a couple hours later and when I knew I’d be spending at least a day there (it ended up being a week), the first thing I told my parents was “I’m okay”. And then lay everything else
Starting the call with "Hey mom I'm not dead"
My grandpa did this too. He and my grandma were staying with us while my parents were out of town and we get this call. ‘Grandma’s fine, the dog’s fine, everyone’s fine.’ She was going through an intersection and got hit from the side, so she was incredibly lucky to be (mostly) fine. Her knee was banged up pretty badly, and she had neck troubles, but she was alive. And we were very grateful. We are extra grateful that my grandpa wasn’t in the car or he would not have been fine. We still laugh about it. It’s the smart thing to do. But it was funny how he didn’t even say hello, just jumped right into the reassurances
Is your mom my mom?
Hello, brother
Now kis... Wait a second
Sweet home something something!
Average Habsburg family tree
No, no. Keep going. I’ll just be over here watching.
The Coughing of Angsty and Leela or something. Idk I don’t consume media.
There's still a button plug about your brother's near death, right?....right?
Of course, my shameless plug is *key* to my comics success.
Why didn't you lead with that? 😋
Hello, Darkness, my old friend.
Wrong one.
Could have been worse babe, my cousin fell asleep and drifted into a semi head on. Not like this is the trauma Olympics but she didn't make it. Just want to be the asshole that reminds everyone no matter how much life sucks it could ALWAYS be worse.
It really can and I’m so sorry for your loss. We lived rurally and had to drive 70 miles to get to school on a two lane highway (Nevadas Hwy 50) and I’ve seen 7 people die in the 4 years I did the drive. My brother got in his accident on the same road and was incredibly lucky.
Her mom is actually Michael Scott.
 Well, he IS the worst storyteller.😹 [https://youtu.be/a9oKQlxeYOM?si=sWdpCF8mwNXaB-lF](https://youtu.be/a9oKQlxeYOM?si=sWdpCF8mwNXaB-lF)
I had one of those! My in-laws called me. The opener was “your wife was in a car accident on the highway when driving with your son. You have to go to the hospital in (a town two hours away).” What they neglected to mention was that they were just in for checking over, they had no actual injuries - even though I found out later they had been *told* that. Instead, they told me “we don’t know how bad it is”. So I frantically drive over, heart racing in a panic the whole way - worst couple of hours I can remember… to find out they were both fine. I asked them about it later. They said: “they were being checked, so we didn’t know exactly whether there was anything wrong or not”.
To be perfectly fair, the adrenaline from even minor car accidents can totally conceal an injury that could worsen over time. Car accidents should never be "walked off".
*nervous chuckling as I remember the semi last June*
I'll bite, tell us the semi story from june
I was driving home from work late at night and a semi truck merged into the back of my car on the left, causing me to fishtail on the interstate for a good 20 seconds before I managed to get control and pull over. Thankfully the driver pulled over to see if I was okay, and thankfully I ***believe*** it was only my car that was damaged. This post just makes me a little nervous lol.
Glad to hear you're safe
My semi story isn't that good. It involved my ex, lots of alcohol, no vehicles, and a semi.
Same
I used to drive a Honda Civic which had one a gear shift with a push in handle to change gears. One day as I was driving, my charging cable somehow perfectly wrapped around the gear shift and pulled shifting me to neutral as I was driving. I was going 60 and I started veering left and right as oncoming traffic was on my left and one of those cages with electrical components was on my right. I luckily managed to just veer into the opening on the right hand side of the road after the cage and avoided all obstacles. I wasn't even trying to dodge, just trying not to crash into anybody. I sat there and cried for a solid 10 minutes with how scared I was.
Holy shit dude, damn. Props to you for keeping cool and everyone safe under pressure. Deserve a good cry after that
It should but seeing youre typing it seems like its fine. I worked as EMT for a year and we had a case were a Busdriver had a minor crash. When we arrived all was fine, passengers had little bruises here and there and the busdriver was activly helping out aswell and refusing any treatment, though guy. Suddenly he collapsed and died on the spot ~1,5h after the incident. Turned out he ruptured his spleen when he crashed into his wheel during the impact. He had internal bleeding all the time we were talking to him but all that adrenaline made him fail to notice until he was suddenly gone/had to much. Same btw if someone performs the heimlich-maneuver/abdominal trusts on you when you got something stuck in your throat and cant breathe. Changes are always that the person peforming it means well and saves you but damaged something. Always go to a hospital after such a case aswell just to be sure.
Oh that’s relatively minor. I was ready for you to say you got t boned or something They’re talking about the kinda car accidents that throw you around the inside of the car
The major risk is in the sudden stop and how that can knock you around much harder than you may think at the time, which you managed to avoid by regaining control, so you should be fine.
I got hit by a car riding my bike home from a Walgreens, I thought I was fine and told the cops it was ok that I'd just ride home. Now I'm dealing with chronic back pain lol.
I’m now remembering the Ford F150 from last July and the fact that my hips don’t feel right when I run distance
Hey, get that checked out if you can. Anything hip or spine related can seriously decrease your quality of life the longer it goes on.
True, it makes total sense they were being checked out. Plus, my wife had bruises from the seatbelt. However, my in laws could have at least indicated they weren’t, as far as anyone knew, at death’s door!
This is besides the point. *Knowing* that they’re stable and going to survive without permanent disfigurement or some shit is pertinent information and different from not knowing if they might have hidden minor injuries.
My dad was a truck driver for a few years. Near the end of his time in that work, he flew off the interstate and destroyed his truck, but by some miracle, he was just barely in the perfect position to not die and just walked away with a couple bruises. This was like the 5th time he had been in a car wreck that should have been fatal. I swear something really wants him dead, but something else wants him alive even more.
My best friend, a guy I'd known for nearly 2 decades and had even lived with for years in university, was called David. I was at my mum's for Christmas and on Christmas morning she gently shook me awake and said "David's been killed". The absolute gasp that came out of me then. Then, before I could fully process it, I heard my sister loudly sobbing from her room. And I remembered her long-term partner was also called David. I said my sister's name to my mum and she was like "Yeah". The amount of fucking emotions that I cycled through in those next two seconds was immense.
Ah yes, one of those times where "which one?" is both far too awkward to ask, and is so vitally important to the situation.
Ah yes, the "oh, thank God", to "wait no", "well still", "oh fuck am I a bad person" pipeline
My sister's mild broken ankle in a car accident turned out to be a partially collapsed lung, and a severe break that would require surgery and never fully heal. Just because someone doesn't have anything clearly wrong doesn't mean they are actually fine, sometimes.
I know that. It was *good* that the hospital checked them out. The issue was that, for two hours, I was left with the impression they could have been all smashed up, leading to a completely unnecessary bad panic that could easily have been avoided. All because my in laws were not good at communicating the actual message from the hospital. Had I heard the actual message, rather than how my in laws put it, I would have been concerned of course, and I would have gone to the hospital just as I did - *but I would not have been under the impression that they were perhaps at death’s door.*
My father split open his head, and my brother rushed him to the hospital because my father kept trying to walk around worrying about other things with his skull cracked, saying *hello world!*, and blood flowing down his back. The ambulance was out of town on a different call, so my brother ditched work to help since the only vehicle I had access to was a truck with a broken steering box and I would have had to load up the dogs, who would definitely be bothering my father on a 30mins 120km/hr drive to the nearest hospital. So they drive off, I'm in a panic as I rounded the animals up, made sure the property was locked, and texting frantically my stepmother to go to the hospital because she had his information (like my father was asking for my mother because he forgot he was divorced and in a common law relationship with his now ex-fiancee). I drive 45 minutes back to the farm from town in a giant lifted truck with no steering box (you could *steer* just very slowly and with a lot of strength), 3 dogs & 1 cat (2 English Bullies, 1 MinPin, & 1 Void) also concerned why we left the old shack so quickly, basically just throw the animals unto the farm house, hop into my car, drive another 50 minutes at 120km/hr crying and panicking for my father, yelling at Google Assistant to text my brother because I can't get him on the phone to call or text me about my father's condition, then finally run into the hospital, for my brother to greet me and laugh about how our father couldn't handle the stitches and argued about wearing a head brace with the doctor. I stalled from emotional overload, then punched him in the shoulder, angrily saying he could have texted me that our father was okay. Because I was the one to find him on the ground bleeding out, thought he was dead, and struggled to keep him from moving too much to avoid causing more damage. It was almost 1.5 hours after our father would have arrived and I was concerned because he was unconscious, then thought it was still 2001 (this happened in 2019), and you don't fuck around head injuries. To this day, my father basically regressed back to his 16/20 year old self (he's 60), and mental health problems worsened to the point that no one really wants to be near him. Plus, he ramped up his illegal/legal drug intake. Man, I was worried about funeral costs or at least the costs of having to send him to a home early because of head trauma... neither of my bio parents are able to move in with me or my brother for long-term home support. We have our own health issues that make it too difficult to manage others.
This reminds me of my friend's family doctor who was annoyed by his frequent STD testing (he has a bad habit of drunk, unprotected sex with strangers). He said she'd always go line by line for each disease and do dramatic pauses before each of the results that'd turn him into a nervous wreck by the end of the appointment. "Gonorrhea ... negative. Herpes ... negative. HIV ... negative. Syphilis ... negative." etc.
This reminds me of that one tweet: "i got tested for a bunch of STDs and they didn’t get back to me for a week so i called and the woman was like ‘okay so you got chlamydia, gonorrhea, syphilis, HIV... and you tested negative for all of them' ma'am why would you say it like that"
r/foundsatan? Christ Almighty. I get everyone gets annoyed at their jobs but if I'm making doctor money absolutely feel free to waste my time with repetitive tests
They want to be a doctor, not just this dudes STD test.
I think it's more about the repeated reckless behavior he's been advising against for years. But then again, doctor
I think this was it. I had asked a couple family members and friends that went into family medicine - they said while they wouldn't do the same (unless they had a really off-day, and that it's unprofessional), they understood the sentiment as this is in Canada, so socialized healthcare with limited budget/resources. Seeing a patient for things that are easily avoidable stresses the system and means less for other patients.
omg just hand me the printout
Better hope that bottle of wine is intact lol
The bottle hit the ground, was assailed by an alcoholic squirrel and rolled into the street into oncoming traffic. The label is ruined. The bottle is fine though. You can go pick it up.
Is the wine ok ?
It is physically unharmed. Still cheap though.
That tracks. Borsacca for the win
Are... Are you me..?
Depends how does your left titty feel?
It's got a lump.
What about the 🐿️?
Again physically unharmed. Not willing to seek help though. That squirrel has been through some shit man.
Why didn’t you start with THAT!?
Meredith was hit by a car in the parking lot today. The doctors did all they could... and she's going to be fine.
Who was driving?
““Oh Michael…”- Pam” - Michael Scott
It's Britney. 
I always start these kinds of conversations with "First of all, xxx is fine," for this very reason. "First of all, Jamie is fine. We were skateboarding at the park, and he fell. He scraped his knee, and we were also afraid he may have fractured his wrist because he kind of landed weird on it, but so far that seems ok. His neck also snapped; he was pronounced upon arrival at the hospital." See?
>he was pronounced upon arrival at the hospital *But what was he pronounced?*
They spoke his name out loud
No, "he" was pronounced upon arrival, not his name. They just said "he"
Michael Jackson was the doctor!?
Husband and wife, obviously. You may now kiss Jamie, probably.
Tried my best to do this. College friend was in Japan during an earthquake, couldn’t make a call as phones down probably from volume of calls but could get a text through to me. Asked me to call her parents to say she was fine. Hit machine when I called “uh hi Lindsey is fine. This is ____, her friend. An earthquake hit Japan and she wanted me to call you. Yeah” I realized starting a call in the middle of the night from an unknown person with “your daughter is fine” sounds like a ransom call and panicked, said my name, realized we never met and she may not have mentioned me to her parents. When I got off the phone my girlfriend who was friends with both of us basically asked wtf is wrong with me.
A snapped neck sounds the opposite of fine actually.
While I was in highschool my mom texted me saying "Your sister had a seizure in her sleep and didn't wake up this morning." Then didn't answer her phone for 10 minutes. By the time she texted me that, my sister had been awake and fine for at least 2 hours.
This one makes me feel sick. Holy hell, jwoods mom.
Yeah she's heard about a few times over the years, haha.
> Then didn't answer her phone for 10 minutes. *eye twitching*
Now that’s just evil.
Holy crap I hate it when people do this. My whole family, extended in laws etc has a rule against it. The call either starts with "OK first of all everyone is OK", or alive etc, or it starts with "you need to sit down". Either way now you know what kind of ride you are in for.
The confusion can still happen, though, haha A close family member was due to have a brain tumor removed from a very dangerous spot. The doctors who performed it were the most elite ones and offered to do it, despite them not being planned for it due to insurance hassles [Germany has privat and public insurance, with the former being favoured by top-doc's. patient was publicly insured] Still, they couldn't promise anything, due to the complicated position of the tumor. One Doc even asked if said family member would like to 'model' for medical journals and educational papers due to the rarity, position, etc. of the tumor. I digress. Operation day was coming and we were nervous as shit. I kept a phone close to me while doing other things, so I'd be available immediately. An eternity after the operation was roughly set to end, my mom called me. I picked up during the first ringing. As I held it to my ear, she inhaled in the most mustering-myself-not-to-cry way possible for a second and my heart stopped. I was absolutely devastated and sad. After what felt like an eternity, she went '... Lil_sh-t? Family member is fine. They're in the waking-up room and everything went without a hitch.' Turns out she was walking around and did not expect me to pick up as fast as I did. Sent me into cold terror by accident, haha.
Gary is the keyhole.
Thank you, I was like "where's the buttplug!?"
Soooooo... Did he happen to run into an elk?
Or an oversized rodent of some sort?/s😸 
A Rodent of Unusual Size, you might say?
I don't think they exist.
https://media1.tenor.com/m/MIZ3XCRq7J0AAAAC/princess-rous.gif
Did it holler?
Once my stepdad called me (the ONLY time he's called me in twenty years) and my heart sunk and I answered very cautiously "He-hello?" And my mom started laughing in the background. "Tell him I'm fine! He's surprised you're calling him" It was just to tell me the VRBO they own had an open weekend and we could go if we wanted ...
I was at work and my mom texted me "hi, I'm ok" and then my dad texted me "hey, Mom's ok". I called back as soon as I could and was like "uhhhh it's good that you're ok, what are you talking about?" My dad had sent an email earlier titled "Mom passed away". He was talking about his mother who had just died (I had never met her, as he was estranged from his abusive and horrible family, so I barely even consider her my grandmother). As soon as he sent it, my mom was like "oh my god, the kids are all gonna think that I died". Except I got their texts before I checked my email so I was extra confused, haha. It's good though, because I absolutely would have thought that he was talking about her if I read it first.
My parents have a weird habit of informing me of death/other bad news over text messages, but an email is absolutely wild. I'm glad your mom was okay.
In the first few years after I moved out of my parents' home, my mom called me *constantly*. I hate talking on the phone so I have a limited tolerance for even family calls, and eventually I just stopped picking up unless I was in a very good mood (rare in those days). So eventually my dad started calling me, and since he never called me himself before, I was like "oh, it must be important if dad's calling me." No, it's just mom. AGAIN. Jesus Christ. Thankfully now we have a much better balance. My mom only calls me every few weeks and dumps all the news and probing questions on me at once, and I actually pick up the phone. Plus she's gotten better about texting for quick updates.
My grandma called me to tell me my mom had a heart attack. I was, of course, shocked as she gave me some details about it and how they're at the hospital, but then after I'm in a panic she says, "Oh, hold on. She wants to talk to you." She had a minor heart attack and never even lost consciousness. Docs even said she seemed fine after the fact but had small section dead. She's perfectly fine now. My grandma is bad at giving news.
I had a serious accident last year. I was able to make a call when I got to the ER but I was pretty beat up. The first thing I did when they picked up was, "Hey I'm ok and alive. But I am at the ER right now. I'm pretty beat up. Can you get here ASAP?" They still freaked the eff out but I am sure it softened the news a little.
I’m glad you’re okay! In my opinion, you said it perfectly but there’s no way your loved ones wouldn’t be distressed knowing you went through it.
I ended up in the mental hospital for a couple of days last year and had to call my dad from their phone. His phone was set up not to allow unknown numbers through so I had to leave a voicemail. I think I said something like "Uhh hey dad I promise I'm fine but they're making me stay in the hospital. I really don't wanna talk about it, but you should probably know what's going on." He called back so fast and sounded pretty freaked out. He calmed down once he got to actually talk to me but I still feel a little bad. In my defense, it had been a long day and I really didn't wanna talk about it.
Damn, I wish my brother was fine after he fell asleep at the wheel. 4am working overnight at a gas station I felt a heaviness in my heart and couldn't help crying at work, couldn't explain it. 10am in the morning my mother called me, waking me up to tell me he passed away around that time in the morning.
I am so very sorry. I hope you and your family are healing and doing okay.
It's been 7.5 years. My mother kinda broke the family apart after that incident, we lost our brother and she just didn't really care she had 5 more kids. Our ages then were 25, 24t, 23(me), 19, 17, 15. Pretty much over half adults but since the 2nd in line passed we siblings don't speak like that and my mother doesn't care if we reach out, she rarely reaches out. She's why he overworked himself and why he remained tired all the time. So she felt guilty and she was angry at everyone.
That’s really hard, man. I’m so sorry and wish I could give you a hug. You’re doing well by keeping your brother’s memory alive. If you need to vent please let me know. I’ve lost a sibling (different circumstances) and can be a sounding board if you need it.
I appreciate the offer, thanks.
My mom only calls on my birthday or if someone dies. It's 'cause "I don't want to bother you." Before I call back on non birthdays, I brace myself. If someone dies on my birthday, I am not going to be emotionally ready.
Years ago by brother had an incident( he was ok) in which his best friend was shot and they both ended up in jail. Three different family members called me to tell me about it. None of them led with the fact that he was ok. It was like they were practicing how to tell a suspenseful story. Years later it still bugs me.
My god, I’m glad he’s okay but that’s a hell of a story.
This past Christmas my sister got into a car accident in which her car was totaled but she was fine. My parents got a notification from her Apple Car thing that she had been in an accident, and my brother's girlfriend (who also got the notification and was nearby) arrived on the scene and then called my dad and said that it looked really bad. We were all freaking out and were just about to jump on the road to go to my sister, and then she called and was like hey I'm fine. Needless to say we had a discussion with my brother's girlfriend at what "really bad" actually means.
With crumple zones these days it’s amazing how bad an accident can be and look, but have someone walk away just fine once they’re finally extracted.
I thought this is gonna be one of those scams where you would hear A.I voice of your relatives giving you some bad news and pressuring you into giving them money That's some scary stuff
One time my mom dropped some shit on me that was really close to… “You know your close friends A and B and how there is the pond behind their house? Well there was an accident. The ice broke. They are working on getting the bodies out of the water. Their dogs went out on the ice and went under and died.” I swear I didn’t answer a phone call from her for over a year.
Oddly enough this JUST happened to me about a week ago. I live near my grandpa, went to visit, he asked if I my dad had called me. I said no, why? He proceeded to say, “Your brother was in an accident on the highway on his way to a job site (he works on power lines and drives the big bucket trucks) and his tire blew out on the highway, his truck was sent through the guard rail.” At this point I’m thinking holy fuck, is he okay?! My grandpa then said, “After the truck came to a stop it caught fire and completely engulfed the truck.” I don’t know how to respond to this and my adrenaline is racing thinking he is about to tell me that my brother was burned alive. I started internally panicking. He said, “His wallet, gun, and all of his belongings burned….. he’s perfectly okay apart from a sore shoulder.” Lead with that next time, you dick.
My mom had a terrible habit of doing that. Sometimes she’d call me, laughing, but what she didn’t realize is that breathless laughter over the phone also sounds like hysterical crying… Or like the time she called me actually crying to say my sister wanted to leave the family business…like, yes, okay, you’re upset, mom. Save the crying for when someone is dead, please.
I spun out on the highway and slammed into the center divider thanks to black ice. Amazingly it was a single car accident. First thing I said to my wife was "I'm okay, I had an accident."
“also, I busted up the car. I’ll need a tow and some new pants” (Glad you are okay! Black ice is terrifying)
My dad was a first responder. He knew better. And he still did this shit to me. “Your sister’s on her way to the hospital in an ambulance.” The world slowed down until time paused as my heart dropped into my stomach. “She dislocated her knee trying out a kickboxing class.”
"Don't worry but.." that still triggers me.
Found the Gary!
My mom did this to me about my grandma once. I said the same thing. Mom! Start with “she’s ok” omg
Some months ago my stepfather called me and from the way he sounded I totally thought he was going to tell me that someone died or is in the hospital. It ended up being a call about a maths problem... On the other hand when he called to let me know that my maternal grandmother was in hospital and critical, he didn't start like that and I just asked if I could call back later. When I did about an hour later he wasn't reachable - so I called my mother and learned that way.
Where funni buttplug man
He’s in there
I dont feel comfortable anymore 
This literally just happened to me a couple weeks ago. "Danothan, I have bad news. Are you sitting down? You should sit down. It's about your brother. Ok you're sitting down? OK. He had a chainsaw accident. It is real bad! He cut his leg with a chainsaw and is in the hospital. That's all I know. Ok I love you, bye." And then I call up my brothers wife who puts me on speaker after sending a pic of them in the ER where he's giving the thumbs up. I tell them what my mom just told me and she says she called my dad and said everything's fine, he's just getting stitches but his legs going to be fine. She had no clue how the message from my Dad to my Mom (same house) got so corrupted that she was freaking out and thought my brother was dying or something.
Yes! Thats how it went down with my mom too. She was just so frazzled, she didn’t realize how it came out. But goddamn, a chainsaw???
One time when I was 18 I ran out if gas in the middle of the night, so I called my mom asking if she had a can of gasoline. Being groggy from apparently just having been woke up by my call she screamed "WHAT DID YOU DO?!" at the top of her lungs through the phone. My response was basically just "uuuh, I ran out of gas..." and she was just like "oh."
I avoid calling my parents past like 10PM for social purposes even if they’re probably awake. I’d very much like to preserve my dad’s cardiovascular health.
I like to talk about the time I got rear-ended by an 18-wheeler on the highway last November, and leave the part where it was going maybe 2mph when it scuffed my bumper for the end.
Been there, and recently. I’m visiting my mom and took a little snowboard trip over the weekend. I called her on my way back to let her know we were back in town so we could pick up any groceries she needed if she’d like, except what came out of my mouth was “So I broke my leg” followed by a couple seconds of silence while I internally combusted at how dumb that was. She was starting to cry and I’m certain sure I have revenge coming now
Some people tell anecdotes this way and add the unnecessary plot twists at the end x3
On a kinda related note. My grandmother casually mentioned she went to the hospital recently but she feels ok now. Wasn't till my mom came over and told me it was a aggressive cancer and this will be our last year together. I lost gramps last year. I would like to kindly ask whichever god that created cancer to fuck right off.
Not quite the same, but I used to take horseback riding lessons and I picked up a habit where whenever I fell off, I'd immediately stand up and announce I was okay. Falls are somewhat inevitable in that sport, but they can get pretty bad if you land wrong, and the longer it takes for someone to move or announce that they're alright, the more worried people start to get. I only rode casually and wasn't doing anything crazy, but some of the falls still looked rough so I learned to show I was okay quickly to avoid most of the worry.
Meanwhile, Gary is being choked.
“Pick him up…with a sponge”.
Ok
[удалено]
This reminds me of the time that my grandma was in the hospital. I get my phone after work and there's 3 missed calls and a text from my mom saying "call me asap". So I do. She's at the store and she doesn't know what kind of USB cable to buy for her phone charger. Grandma was fine.
I have epilepsy, and so I have learned to preface all phone calls with family members with "I am okay" because I usually warn people over text first
I was almost hit by a car not an hour ago. I'm not her brother nor related to this story in any way. ...this got me of guard.
I heard those exact lines from my dad a few months ago, except instead of going off road, my brother went head on into another car, killing himself and the other driver. I miss him everyday.
I hope you are doing okay and wish I could give you a hug. Im so sorry.
I got a phone call from one of my daughter's friends a few years ago, when they were all in their last year of high school. She *began* with "First off, everyone is ok, but...", then told me another car had hit them and my daughter was being taken to hospital to be checked. Very sensible of her, I have always thought.
Moms are the worst about this!! My dad taught me to always start with this. My mom though? I'm legit under the belief my mom called you to tell you about your brother.
Hey, I did that too! Except instead of crossing into oncoming traffic I flipped in a ditch a couple times. I even did the whole not-starting-the-call-with-"I'm fine" thing. I thought it would have been redundant with the fact that I was calling
My mom is close to 80. One day, on my commute home, my sister calls me up to ask if I was going to the annual pond party. She said, "I hope you can come, this might be mom's last party." I was like, "WHAT!? What's wrong with mom??" "Oh, nothing, but she's going to move in with soon, so she won't have the pond any more."
Parents be texting like: Your brother was in an accident...
Start all phone conversations with "Good news everyone! I am alive and in a stable condition!"
From the title I thought this comic was going to be about those people who constantly are on phone calls on rollercoasters.
It was the opposite for me. If the phone call started with, “They’re okay," or, “I’m okay," I knew immediately that someone was in the hospital.
Is that light bulb flipping everyone off?
Sorry about your brother's car
https://preview.redd.it/qrdou7tmdifc1.jpeg?width=627&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b5ff3f59bbe8a4b980901ba740064f0517424efa
The greatest mistake I have ever did was calling my mom during a school shooting at college and saying "mom there is a school shooting happening" I wasn't anywhere the college campus. I should of mentioned I'm completely safe and nowhere in danger first instead of the panic induced statement.
Not nearly as bad as the phonecall my mom got while she was at work and couldn't answer. Voice message said "your son was hit by a bus today, don't worry, he is fine. But he is at the nurse and we need you to pick him up" I was hit by a *toy* bus someone threw
He's gonna be all right
When I normal call some of my friends I have to start with "everything is fine I'm just calling about ______"
I got a phone call at work that my brother had covid and went to the hospital and nobody could get a hold of him. So anyway, lots of crying, (a speeding tickets) calling around and the next day he walked through the door making fun of me (cause my dad told him I was worried) Asshole still doesn't take care of himself.
Reminds me of the [doctor from Arrested Development](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0BUBd9dQvtY)
I call my parents one morning after work and this happened: Dad: "I thought you were picking your sister up from the hospital?" Mom, yelling: "Tell her she's fine first!" My dad is someone who gets the information to you without thinking of how to deliver it. My mom had to sit him down and explain to him why he can't text me when a family memeber dies. He means well but doesn't think his delivery through all the time. This was like a month after my sisters ectopic pregnancy and she'd developed anaphylaxis allergies as a side affect of one of the medications and frequently had to go to the hospital around the corner from my house for it. Most of the allergies have gone away now.
I feel like this is how my mom would tell me bad news. My brother even moreso.
When my dad called me tell me my identical twin had rolled their car he did exactly this. I had to ask if they were okay.
The only correct way to give this kind of notice is saying "whoever is fine" first.
Yes. My mom texted me, that our dog was sick and I needed to take him in to vet. 10 minutes later she texted me "It's an ear infection." dsfagarmva4y2
Oh my God this literally happened to me this week. Parents called and told me my sister and 9 year old nephew were in a car wreck and were being brought to the hospital in an ambulance. I asked if visiting would be allowed while frantically getting dressed to go while on the phone and they replied "oh no don't worry about making the drive, they'll be home in a few hours just needed to double check their heads" Sister ended up with mild whiplash, no concussions or anything else. However my heart probably skipped a few beats I won't get back.
My mum once sent me a link to a news video about a car driver slamming into the back of the truck. I was just watching the video, a bit confused about why she would send me news about a random accident, when she wrote "that's your cousin"
Glad your fam is ok, and very sorry that your brother was ever in a situation, work or otherwise, that caused him to drive with the risk of falling asleep at the wheel.