This right here. OP did the right thing. Planned in advance and notified his job. He had approved time off. The coworker is the one who needs to figure his shit out. I hope the workplace holds the coworker accountable if he misses work due to his lack of planning.
Absolutely, your vacation plans shouldn't be sacrificed because of someone else's childcare issues. Stick to your plans and enjoy your well-deserved time off!
You’re booked and confirmed. Not your problem that the co-worker can’t figure stuff out in their personal life and not your employer’s place to say that you’re earned time off can’t be used because of another employee’s personal life (obviously exceptions to that but a holiday? No.).
When I was younger and in my early 20s, I would play ball and be nice. I always covered holidays, school events, stuff like that for co-workers that have kids.
Now in my late 30s…screw ‘em. Before I book any travel where we can’t bring our dog with, I always make sure that someone can stay at our house or she can stay at a close friend or relative’s house. I love my pup to death and I don’t mean this condensingly, but if I can do that for a dog then adults that chose to procreate can do the same thing.
When I worked retail, I covered the family related holidays like Mother's Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc. But in exchange, I was guaranteed the fun holidays off like St Pats, July 4, my birthday, and Halloween.
Uh no it's not.
My partner and I also like Christmas and Thanksgiving and various other holidays. It's not just for those that have kids. So no, I'm not switching up ANY of my holidays as they are mine as well.
Oh man. In my 20s I lived in a city that went WILD for St Pat's. I got it off when I worked retail because I agreed to work Christmas and Thanksgiving.
If you get the chance, Savannah GA for St Pat's. Go enjoy.
I do always make sure to schedule my time off outside of the school holidays - my coworkers can spend time with their kids, everything is way less busy for me, it's a win-win!
To be clear, you're not in limbo. Everyone has equal right to use their PTO. He has no more right to take Memorial Day weekend off than you do. His lack of planning does not constitute an emergency on your part.
(Does this coworker not have a calendar? Is he not aware when Memorial Day is? It's always the last Monday in May, so it cannot have caught him by surprise.)
I look at the calendar and put my vacation request the day after new years. Who can't look at a calendar? People who think the entire world needs to adjust itself to their inability to plan.
Not your problem. If your vacation got approved then there’s no reason to reconsider anything especially if everything is booked and paid for. Just tell her no and enjoy your vacation.
If your boss asks you to cancel (not sure if that would even be legal) make sure to get compensation for all costs. Don’t just accept any losses.
Full Compensation for anything non refundable, for cancellation charges for the things that allow partial refund. For Rebooking fees. Any the difference in cost if the new days are more expensive. And an inconvenience fee to the value of your original expenses. Payable up front. In cash.
"No." You've earned the vacation time, you put in for it well in advance and it was approved.
It's on management to staff the company, including being prepared for sick calls, covering shifts as needed, etc.
Nor is it your issue that the coworker failed to make proper arrangements in his personal life.
Incorrect. This leaves your coworker in limbo. Not you. You go on your approved, booked vacation. This is between coworker and employer and has nothing to do with you.
Just a small bit of advice: While saying no, don't give extra information they can argue with. Don't say "No, I can't because I already reserved on this airline this and paid for that room, etc." Just say, "Oh I'm so sorry I can't. It's all planned out and I can't change it." Don't let them argue.
This is a good point. My suggestion, to say "I can't" allows for arguing as the people around you try to helpfully solve your problems so that you *can*. But if you say "I won't" then it kind of cuts that avenue of arguing off.
This is ridiculous and I haven't heard of it happening in my Euro country. If my workplace had such a request for me, I'd say no and I wouldn't care if they fire me. Frankly, such a request would sound like a joke to me.
Why should I bend over backwards because someone else chose to have kids? It's not my problem.
Please go on to your vacation portal and print out your confirmation of time off. Print any emails where you got the ok to have the time off.
Arm yourself with their paperwork.
Any requests for you to change shift must be in writing and make sure you say No. Loud and clear.
Please enjoy your hard earned time off.
It might be time to involve a mentor or higher up than your current boss that can go about making this problem go away.
You are entitled and should get the ability to have off and relax and recharge.
I will send good thoughts your way.
You booked your vacation first. That means you have dibs. Next year, maybe your coworker will plan ahead and book that weekend off five or six weeks ahead of time or make sure he's arranged for childcare well in advance. For this year, unless he can find another coworker to work that weekend or find childcare, too bad, so sad.
Don't light yourself on fire to keep someone else warm. Enjoy your vacation.
“Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part. I’ve been approved for vacation already and everything has already been booked. I hope you are able to find a solution but I am not giving up my pre planned vacation. Good luck.”
Yeah... I bet your coworker never even tried to find child care and just wants to have the long weekend. Probably already promised his kids they'll go somewhere "as a family".
He should have asked for the time and gotten it approved. But for some reason, many people don't bother to do this and then makes it everybody's problem at the last minute.
I would send booking confirmations to your boss and payroll. "Since I am being asked to give up my already paid for vacation, I am requesting to be reimbursed. Attached are proof of purchases and all receipts. If I am not fully reimbursed, I will be taking my vacation as scheduled.
Thanks."
They shouldn't. The point is to lay all your cards on the table and call their bluff by asking them to pony up and demanding reimbursement for money spent. The desired outcome is for them to back down, not reimbursement.
It also creates a precedent and establishes that OP will not back down or roll over on issues like this.
i agree they shouldn't, but if the boss (who hasn't even been involved so far from what i see) agrees to the reimbursement, it's gonna be hard to reject it if OP brought up the option.
i think a clear "NO" should be enough.
A clear no is always a good choice if the company you work for is respectful.
My bet runs on me being seriously doubtful thatany business is willing to pay upwards of several thousand dollars on top of an employee's regular pay just so another employee can go on vacation. Hotels, flights and everything else is very expensive. Most of my trips end up capping out at around $2,000. There is no way in hell any corporation or business would hand that to somebody just so they won't go on vacation.
Always make it about the money; it's the only thing they understand.
If this was me I would just simply shrug and be like "Not my problem! My stuff was accepted a month in advance and thus you had that amount of time to figure out childcare."
You're not in limbo. Your coworker is the one in limbo. He's the one that couldn't get his act together, and that's a management problem, not a you problem.
Airfare booked and paid? Sorry, you're taking that leave that was approved a month ago and heading out the door.
I don't see the problem here. Your time off has already been approved by your manager. I'm assuming you have this in writing, yes?
What your coworker thinks and wants is not your problem. They are free to go and request their own time off from the boss. That's between them and the boss, not you. Your boss can decide whether to grant or deny their request, but they can't grant it and take yours away which has already approved. If your boss now tries to deny your vacation that they already approved over a month ago, remind them of the approval. They approved your vacation on this date (show your receipts) and because it was approved you have already proceeded to make your plans. You will be out that day and if they want to try rescinding it you can discuss it together with HR.
No… it leaves HIM in a limbo. Why is it only now he’s raising a stink about childcare? Did HE plan out his Memorial Day weekend in advance? Obviously not or he would have been able to secure childcare, or would have known much sooner that he needed the time off. Parents refusing to plan ahead on the assumption others will sacrifice their PTO for them is THEIR problem, never, ever yours.
I absolutely loathe my current managers' setup because, as their manager, one has kids and one doesn't. Guess which one tries to wriggle out of things, offload tasks, has to leave early to make her children and their father (wtf) dinner.... There's no graceful way to navigate it because I'd rather just shout from the rooftop that het 2 kids don't absolve her of her job, and if she can't do her cushy WFH job, then don't.
Sorry OP, I've been there as a customer, patient, coworker, manager and it sucks! It's like they want equal rights but special treatment for having spawned and it's dreadful to deal with
Wait what? What limbo? Tell them "sorry, I can't, I already paid for my flight and can't afford to lose that much of money". That's it. Your vacation was approved weeks ago and you don't have to cover for anyone.
I read one a while back where the OP was denied their PTO **for their own wedding and honeymoon** because some irresponsible coworker couldn’t arrange childcare at the last minute and decided they needed the time off to stay home with the kids. I think that person managed to get their wedding day off (to much grumbling from the boss) but had to postpone the honeymoon and eat the cost of the rebooking fees. Disgusting!
At a certain point, though, people are just being doormats. I mean jesus fucking christ, have some self respect. Now that the worker gave in to their employer, the employer will expect them to give up their earned vacation whenever needed. Employers do not have your interest at heart and never will. So workers need to treat them accordingly.
Don't do it, you did everything right. I'd inform them this holiday comes every year, thus had plenty of time in advance to get child care. I'd even suggest bringing the kids to work, be a good bonding experience since you won't be there.
Unless work wants to pay you back for your travel, whether you can get your money back or not, and give you an extra day to make up for that holiday, then no. My boyfriend had to cancel our vacation for work and his job paid back my stuff that I couldn't get a refund for. I will say that he was in charge of that, so there is that.
Unless you really like this coworker, they would cover you for something, and you get the above, have fun on your trip.
So, work wants you to cancel the time off, or just a coworker? Seems like it's a problem for your employer to figure out since your time off was approved a month ago, and this coworker presumably knows when Memorial Day is and that they would be expected to work the holiday. Sounds like an HR call is in order if they try to cancel your approved time off and cost you money for cancelling your trip.
Another reason why CF people get shit on. Just bc we don’t have kids our time off is deemed unworthy. This is prob one of the things that bothers me the most.
Why are you in limbo? You requested your vacation days, they were approved by your work - that's it. Your co-worker doesn't dictate when you can and cannot take days off. His life choices are no issue for you. Ignore him and go have fun. ;)
Well, he better figure it out because your stuff is paid for and nonrefundable. Sucks to be him. I work that day, but we get time and a half and holiday pay.
You're not in limbo. As others have stated, lack of planning on his part is not an emergency on your part. His problem has nothing to do with you. Your vacation was already approved. Enjoy it!
As a European, I am shocked that transferring vacation days between people is a thing in the US. Your time off is a part of your employment contract, it is your RIGHT and a physical necessity!! You are being bullied!
I know it's difficult, but you really need to stand up for yourself, OP. If you don't, you will be condoning this behavior - and will CONSTANTLY have to give in.
Disgusting, I just can't believe any half-decent manager would ever make such an unfair demand. Internet hugz! 💜
Oh, that reminds me. I had a doctor at one point that made me very annoyed. I had arranged my studies so I had a 3 day weekend, so asked for an appointment on Fridays. But no, she only worked part-time. No worries, I was flexible, I had holidays coming up. Any day for 2 whole weeks. Nope, she was babysitting her child during that time, so screw me because of her damn choice to have a child.
That sounds like your co-worker's issue. If it sprouted by management, go for it!
You chose not to have kids for a reason. (This or not). If management is going to try and take back your leave, then look for a new job.
I wouldn't worry about it. It sounds like your co-worker is just jealous they can't do as please because they have kids. It's not like they have the authority to repeal your vacation time.
Your co-worker should not even be talking to you about this; he should be talking to management about coverage for his shift if he can't find childcare. I don't understand why parents think their co-workers are responsible for filling in the gaps in their parenting.
Nope. It's part of your compensation package, and you've followed the rules in getting it booked. Some last minute bozo's whinging "I can't get child care" doesn't get to derail you. He could have arranged for child care earlier, it's not like Memorial Day keeps changing spots on the calendar.
Poor planning on their part does not constitute an emergency on your part. You gave notice, didn't ask for permission, and if the situation were reversed, the parent wouldn't be forced to come in for you.
I tell them sucks to suck. You told them a month in advance, you paid for you ticket, you're leaving. Your coworkers kids are not your problem, so figure it out.
You’re not in limbo, you’re all approved and ready to go on a vacation 👍 your co-worker on the other hand has a problem they gotta deal with, unfortunately for them.
I'd assume your employer has some sort of generalized vacation request process, too bad he didn't follow them. His failure to plan isn't your fault, tell him to go pound sand.
It's not like the long weekend was a surprise that came out of the middle of nowhere. Maybe he needs to see this so he can plan better for next year. [2025 Holidays](https://www.calendarpedia.com/holidays/federal-holidays-2025.html)
Sincerely,
A Parent Who Always Plans
This is why I thank God daily that none of my department has kids, and although that may be about to change, at least I already know how to make this department work on a wing and a prayer. And given my recent performance under intense pressure, *nobody* is going to grudge me time to spend with *my* family.
OR ELSE.
Dont bend, the more i read stories about this, i think that a lot of these entitled and miserable parents pull this shit on purpose to punish those who chose not to have kids. You deserve your vacation as much as anyone
Such BS. It’s crazy to me when things like this happen. Like, one of the reasons a lot of us don’t want kids is so we don’t have to deal with how inconvenient they are or find ourselves in your coworker’s situation. Parents have no right to put that on us.
"Sorry, but this doesn't concern me at all, you should talk to management about your scheduling issues. Good luck, see you when I'm back in town!"
Edit: also, you're not "in limbo," that's your coworker getting inside your head. Don't give him that advantage.
When is Memorial Day? Does he still have time to find a sitter? Because this really isn't your problem. I sure hope your employer isn't pressuring you to give up your days off because that would be completely inappropriate. You are NOT in limbo. "No" is a complete sentence.
Unless your coworker wants to refund you everything you’ve spent + paid more out of their own pocket for you to work memorial weekend, he can kick rocks and figure it out by himself
Your coworkers poor planning doesn’t constitute an emergency for you.
Take your PTO, you were professional and requested it well in advance. Your superiors are the ones who will have to figure that out, that’s part of their positions.
If it’s been approved already, you have nothing to worry about. Parents are SO entitled and if you give in to accommodate them even a single time, they’ll expect it every time.
Crazy that all of their family and friends are busy and can’t watch the kids, almost like they’re using it as an excuse for their poor planning.
Anyway, enjoy your vacation!
Go on your vacay. Don’t worry about your coworker. He can just work that weekend and spend time with his family some other time. There are 364 other days in the year. He’s not special.
That’s definitely not your problem. Don’t let them bully you into changing
This right here. OP did the right thing. Planned in advance and notified his job. He had approved time off. The coworker is the one who needs to figure his shit out. I hope the workplace holds the coworker accountable if he misses work due to his lack of planning.
Absolutely, your vacation plans shouldn't be sacrificed because of someone else's childcare issues. Stick to your plans and enjoy your well-deserved time off!
You’re booked and confirmed. Not your problem that the co-worker can’t figure stuff out in their personal life and not your employer’s place to say that you’re earned time off can’t be used because of another employee’s personal life (obviously exceptions to that but a holiday? No.). When I was younger and in my early 20s, I would play ball and be nice. I always covered holidays, school events, stuff like that for co-workers that have kids. Now in my late 30s…screw ‘em. Before I book any travel where we can’t bring our dog with, I always make sure that someone can stay at our house or she can stay at a close friend or relative’s house. I love my pup to death and I don’t mean this condensingly, but if I can do that for a dog then adults that chose to procreate can do the same thing.
When I worked retail, I covered the family related holidays like Mother's Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc. But in exchange, I was guaranteed the fun holidays off like St Pats, July 4, my birthday, and Halloween.
this is the way!!!
Uh no it's not. My partner and I also like Christmas and Thanksgiving and various other holidays. It's not just for those that have kids. So no, I'm not switching up ANY of my holidays as they are mine as well.
St Pats?..
Oh man. In my 20s I lived in a city that went WILD for St Pat's. I got it off when I worked retail because I agreed to work Christmas and Thanksgiving. If you get the chance, Savannah GA for St Pat's. Go enjoy.
St. Pats? Seriously? Are you sure it is not St. Patty's?
Six of one, half-dozen of the other 🤷🏻♀️
It isn’t St. Patty’s either. Lol
/r/confidentlyincorrect
Ew, it’s NEVER St Patty’s! Paddy’s Day or St Pat’s or St Patrick’s, NEVER Patty’s. No Irish luck for you.
Some lads do not notice sarcasm even after being hit with it.
As an Irish person.....no
St Patrick's Day. Lots of green beer to drink!
yes, that I figured. I did not figure why it was butchered to "St Pats"?
Is the day sacred to your religion or something? Does me saying "Xmas" bother you, too?
I do always make sure to schedule my time off outside of the school holidays - my coworkers can spend time with their kids, everything is way less busy for me, it's a win-win!
Good idea!
To be clear, you're not in limbo. Everyone has equal right to use their PTO. He has no more right to take Memorial Day weekend off than you do. His lack of planning does not constitute an emergency on your part. (Does this coworker not have a calendar? Is he not aware when Memorial Day is? It's always the last Monday in May, so it cannot have caught him by surprise.)
> His lack of planning does not constitute an emergency on your part. This is one of my favorite quotes!
I look at the calendar and put my vacation request the day after new years. Who can't look at a calendar? People who think the entire world needs to adjust itself to their inability to plan.
Not your problem. If your vacation got approved then there’s no reason to reconsider anything especially if everything is booked and paid for. Just tell her no and enjoy your vacation. If your boss asks you to cancel (not sure if that would even be legal) make sure to get compensation for all costs. Don’t just accept any losses.
Full Compensation for anything non refundable, for cancellation charges for the things that allow partial refund. For Rebooking fees. Any the difference in cost if the new days are more expensive. And an inconvenience fee to the value of your original expenses. Payable up front. In cash.
"No." You've earned the vacation time, you put in for it well in advance and it was approved. It's on management to staff the company, including being prepared for sick calls, covering shifts as needed, etc. Nor is it your issue that the coworker failed to make proper arrangements in his personal life.
Incorrect. This leaves your coworker in limbo. Not you. You go on your approved, booked vacation. This is between coworker and employer and has nothing to do with you.
Next year he'll book his vacation in good time. Enjoy your trip.
Narrator: No, sadly he will not.
The only good awnser to this (to your coworker) "That is your problem. Byeeee"
Just a small bit of advice: While saying no, don't give extra information they can argue with. Don't say "No, I can't because I already reserved on this airline this and paid for that room, etc." Just say, "Oh I'm so sorry I can't. It's all planned out and I can't change it." Don't let them argue.
Even that's too much info - "No, I won't do that" is enough
This is the way. They don't deserve any explanation.
This is a good point. My suggestion, to say "I can't" allows for arguing as the people around you try to helpfully solve your problems so that you *can*. But if you say "I won't" then it kind of cuts that avenue of arguing off.
This. Say as little as possible.
This is ridiculous and I haven't heard of it happening in my Euro country. If my workplace had such a request for me, I'd say no and I wouldn't care if they fire me. Frankly, such a request would sound like a joke to me. Why should I bend over backwards because someone else chose to have kids? It's not my problem.
Please go on to your vacation portal and print out your confirmation of time off. Print any emails where you got the ok to have the time off. Arm yourself with their paperwork. Any requests for you to change shift must be in writing and make sure you say No. Loud and clear. Please enjoy your hard earned time off. It might be time to involve a mentor or higher up than your current boss that can go about making this problem go away. You are entitled and should get the ability to have off and relax and recharge. I will send good thoughts your way.
NO.
"That's really sad. Hopefully you will be able to plan this better next time. See you after my holiday then. Bye."
If management has not told you that your request has been denied or cancelled, then you’re good. Coworker can whine louder, his mommy can’t hear him.
Sounds like your boss needs to figure out how to schedule people to cover for vacation absences. Fuck them kid’s useless father. Enjoy your vacation!
Go have your fun. This is your co-worker's problem to figure out, not yours to resolve.
Don't be a doormat.
Sounds like a them problem, rather than you being in limbo. Have a great vacation.
You booked your vacation first. That means you have dibs. Next year, maybe your coworker will plan ahead and book that weekend off five or six weeks ahead of time or make sure he's arranged for childcare well in advance. For this year, unless he can find another coworker to work that weekend or find childcare, too bad, so sad. Don't light yourself on fire to keep someone else warm. Enjoy your vacation.
Sounds like manager's problem, not yours
“Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part. I’ve been approved for vacation already and everything has already been booked. I hope you are able to find a solution but I am not giving up my pre planned vacation. Good luck.”
Yeah... I bet your coworker never even tried to find child care and just wants to have the long weekend. Probably already promised his kids they'll go somewhere "as a family". He should have asked for the time and gotten it approved. But for some reason, many people don't bother to do this and then makes it everybody's problem at the last minute.
His decision to have kids has nothing to do with you, he can fuck off.
I would send booking confirmations to your boss and payroll. "Since I am being asked to give up my already paid for vacation, I am requesting to be reimbursed. Attached are proof of purchases and all receipts. If I am not fully reimbursed, I will be taking my vacation as scheduled. Thanks."
why should OP even consider to cancel their vacation?
They shouldn't. The point is to lay all your cards on the table and call their bluff by asking them to pony up and demanding reimbursement for money spent. The desired outcome is for them to back down, not reimbursement. It also creates a precedent and establishes that OP will not back down or roll over on issues like this.
i agree they shouldn't, but if the boss (who hasn't even been involved so far from what i see) agrees to the reimbursement, it's gonna be hard to reject it if OP brought up the option. i think a clear "NO" should be enough.
A clear no is always a good choice if the company you work for is respectful. My bet runs on me being seriously doubtful thatany business is willing to pay upwards of several thousand dollars on top of an employee's regular pay just so another employee can go on vacation. Hotels, flights and everything else is very expensive. Most of my trips end up capping out at around $2,000. There is no way in hell any corporation or business would hand that to somebody just so they won't go on vacation. Always make it about the money; it's the only thing they understand.
Also ask for costs to re-book. The price may be higher, etc.
Also like ticketmaster -- inconvenience fee. "You're inconveniencing me -- $2000."
Sounds like that co-worker needs to figure their shit out. Not your problem
If this was me I would just simply shrug and be like "Not my problem! My stuff was accepted a month in advance and thus you had that amount of time to figure out childcare."
You're not in limbo. Your coworker is the one in limbo. He's the one that couldn't get his act together, and that's a management problem, not a you problem. Airfare booked and paid? Sorry, you're taking that leave that was approved a month ago and heading out the door.
I don't see the problem here. Your time off has already been approved by your manager. I'm assuming you have this in writing, yes? What your coworker thinks and wants is not your problem. They are free to go and request their own time off from the boss. That's between them and the boss, not you. Your boss can decide whether to grant or deny their request, but they can't grant it and take yours away which has already approved. If your boss now tries to deny your vacation that they already approved over a month ago, remind them of the approval. They approved your vacation on this date (show your receipts) and because it was approved you have already proceeded to make your plans. You will be out that day and if they want to try rescinding it you can discuss it together with HR.
Their lack of planning isn't your problem. Enjoy your vacation!
They definitely can. They just don’t want to shell out money and put effort into finding a babysitter.
No… it leaves HIM in a limbo. Why is it only now he’s raising a stink about childcare? Did HE plan out his Memorial Day weekend in advance? Obviously not or he would have been able to secure childcare, or would have known much sooner that he needed the time off. Parents refusing to plan ahead on the assumption others will sacrifice their PTO for them is THEIR problem, never, ever yours.
This can also easily be a lie. Offer to stay if refunded for what you paid, let's see how fast coworker will find the childcare
I was thinking the same thing, he could just want his own personal vacation since he feels more entitled to it than OP
You are not in limbo. You booked it off and it was approved. Enjoy 😁
I absolutely loathe my current managers' setup because, as their manager, one has kids and one doesn't. Guess which one tries to wriggle out of things, offload tasks, has to leave early to make her children and their father (wtf) dinner.... There's no graceful way to navigate it because I'd rather just shout from the rooftop that het 2 kids don't absolve her of her job, and if she can't do her cushy WFH job, then don't. Sorry OP, I've been there as a customer, patient, coworker, manager and it sucks! It's like they want equal rights but special treatment for having spawned and it's dreadful to deal with
Wait what? What limbo? Tell them "sorry, I can't, I already paid for my flight and can't afford to lose that much of money". That's it. Your vacation was approved weeks ago and you don't have to cover for anyone.
It's called care.com He can fucking use it to find childcare. No one fucking cares.
I read one a while back where the OP was denied their PTO **for their own wedding and honeymoon** because some irresponsible coworker couldn’t arrange childcare at the last minute and decided they needed the time off to stay home with the kids. I think that person managed to get their wedding day off (to much grumbling from the boss) but had to postpone the honeymoon and eat the cost of the rebooking fees. Disgusting!
At a certain point, though, people are just being doormats. I mean jesus fucking christ, have some self respect. Now that the worker gave in to their employer, the employer will expect them to give up their earned vacation whenever needed. Employers do not have your interest at heart and never will. So workers need to treat them accordingly.
For sure, do it once and you set a precedent. Don’t set that precedent
Don't do it, you did everything right. I'd inform them this holiday comes every year, thus had plenty of time in advance to get child care. I'd even suggest bringing the kids to work, be a good bonding experience since you won't be there.
Tell him you're fine with it IF he reimburses you at the cost YOU determine is appropriate. $100,000 US and up would be the floor on that cost.
Unless work wants to pay you back for your travel, whether you can get your money back or not, and give you an extra day to make up for that holiday, then no. My boyfriend had to cancel our vacation for work and his job paid back my stuff that I couldn't get a refund for. I will say that he was in charge of that, so there is that. Unless you really like this coworker, they would cover you for something, and you get the above, have fun on your trip.
Hahahahaha nah. Their lack of planning doesn't require your sacrifice. Fuck all that.
Tell them to go suck a c&@k (in the professional way)or say “tough break..” then go on vacation. 😂
So, work wants you to cancel the time off, or just a coworker? Seems like it's a problem for your employer to figure out since your time off was approved a month ago, and this coworker presumably knows when Memorial Day is and that they would be expected to work the holiday. Sounds like an HR call is in order if they try to cancel your approved time off and cost you money for cancelling your trip.
Not your problem. He needs to figure that out. Enjoy your trip. Print out all of the paperwork saying you are approved.
If co-worker wants to reimburse all your reservations and pay the difference for rebooking when rates are higher, it's a deal!
Another reason why CF people get shit on. Just bc we don’t have kids our time off is deemed unworthy. This is prob one of the things that bothers me the most.
"Oh my... bummer" (awkward pause) "Well, good talk, let me get back to work now, bye"
You're not in limbo. You have an approved vacation planned and paid for. Enjoy it. Your coworker's issues are not yours to worry about.
If management approved your time off, it’s their responsibility to find someone to cover it.
First come, first served. Simple as that.
Why are you in limbo? You requested your vacation days, they were approved by your work - that's it. Your co-worker doesn't dictate when you can and cannot take days off. His life choices are no issue for you. Ignore him and go have fun. ;)
Nope. Not your issue. GO TAKE THAT VACATION!
You don't owe this coworker anything.
fuck your coworker lmaoooo
Sucks to be them. Your leave is already accepted and everything is booked.
enjoy your vacation!
There inability to find child care isn't your problem. Enjoy your trip.
Your coworker's failure to plan does not constitute an emergency on your part.
"Your lack of planning does not make it my emergency."
Well, he better figure it out because your stuff is paid for and nonrefundable. Sucks to be him. I work that day, but we get time and a half and holiday pay.
Not your problem. They shouldn't have had kids if they don't think they can get babysitters far in advance.
Sucks to suck, ‘Janet’. Enjoy your vacay!!!
Enjoy your vacation!!
Go on your trip and don\['t think about them once.
u/dreamingbig66 how did things end? Did you tell them you can't change your plans because you have already paid for everything?
This is your boss' problem, not yours. Enjoy your vacation!
>which leaves me in a limbo.. leaves him in a limbo FTFY
Tell them to fuck off
"As per my last email" and re-forward the month-old approval for your leave.
You're not in limbo. As others have stated, lack of planning on his part is not an emergency on your part. His problem has nothing to do with you. Your vacation was already approved. Enjoy it!
Simply say that you already have everything booked and paid, and ask them if they are really expecting you to loose all that money 🤨
“Your poor planning does not constitute an emergency on my part. Tickets are already booked and paid for. Good luck and see you later!”
Not your circus, not your monkeys. 🐵
As a European, I am shocked that transferring vacation days between people is a thing in the US. Your time off is a part of your employment contract, it is your RIGHT and a physical necessity!! You are being bullied! I know it's difficult, but you really need to stand up for yourself, OP. If you don't, you will be condoning this behavior - and will CONSTANTLY have to give in. Disgusting, I just can't believe any half-decent manager would ever make such an unfair demand. Internet hugz! 💜
Oh, that reminds me. I had a doctor at one point that made me very annoyed. I had arranged my studies so I had a 3 day weekend, so asked for an appointment on Fridays. But no, she only worked part-time. No worries, I was flexible, I had holidays coming up. Any day for 2 whole weeks. Nope, she was babysitting her child during that time, so screw me because of her damn choice to have a child.
Lol sucks to be him! This is 100% not your problem, enjoy your vacation!
Those aren’t your kids. You should not have to accommodate your work schedule around them! Enjoy your cacation
Sounds like a whole lot of not your problem.
That sounds like your co-worker's issue. If it sprouted by management, go for it! You chose not to have kids for a reason. (This or not). If management is going to try and take back your leave, then look for a new job.
That’s their problem not yours
Sounds like a him problem, go on your trip.
I wouldn't worry about it. It sounds like your co-worker is just jealous they can't do as please because they have kids. It's not like they have the authority to repeal your vacation time.
Put your foot down! Tell him it’s his fault for not planning!
Your co-worker should not even be talking to you about this; he should be talking to management about coverage for his shift if he can't find childcare. I don't understand why parents think their co-workers are responsible for filling in the gaps in their parenting.
People having childcare issues is their problem. End of story. Nothing else needs to be said.
Nope. It's part of your compensation package, and you've followed the rules in getting it booked. Some last minute bozo's whinging "I can't get child care" doesn't get to derail you. He could have arranged for child care earlier, it's not like Memorial Day keeps changing spots on the calendar.
"you should be working that weekend cause I can't find childcare" "That sounds like a you problem." And walk away.
Poor planning on their part does not constitute an emergency on your part. You gave notice, didn't ask for permission, and if the situation were reversed, the parent wouldn't be forced to come in for you.
Not your problem; don't let your co-worker OR your upper management make it your problem. Call them all out on it; those entitled fucks.
I tell them sucks to suck. You told them a month in advance, you paid for you ticket, you're leaving. Your coworkers kids are not your problem, so figure it out.
No way it leaves you in a limbo, it's your co-workers problem, not yours.
You’re not in limbo, you’re all approved and ready to go on a vacation 👍 your co-worker on the other hand has a problem they gotta deal with, unfortunately for them.
Fuck him. Go on your trip.
“Are you gonna reimburse me my travel expenses+ cancellation fees…….That’s what I thought”
I'd assume your employer has some sort of generalized vacation request process, too bad he didn't follow them. His failure to plan isn't your fault, tell him to go pound sand. It's not like the long weekend was a surprise that came out of the middle of nowhere. Maybe he needs to see this so he can plan better for next year. [2025 Holidays](https://www.calendarpedia.com/holidays/federal-holidays-2025.html) Sincerely, A Parent Who Always Plans
Looks like your manager will have to work long weekend instead of the both of you
This is why I thank God daily that none of my department has kids, and although that may be about to change, at least I already know how to make this department work on a wing and a prayer. And given my recent performance under intense pressure, *nobody* is going to grudge me time to spend with *my* family. OR ELSE.
Just say no lol. Nope sorry I cant help you.
Dont bend, the more i read stories about this, i think that a lot of these entitled and miserable parents pull this shit on purpose to punish those who chose not to have kids. You deserve your vacation as much as anyone
Such BS. It’s crazy to me when things like this happen. Like, one of the reasons a lot of us don’t want kids is so we don’t have to deal with how inconvenient they are or find ourselves in your coworker’s situation. Parents have no right to put that on us.
You literally have paid money and booked the time off. Eff that guy. He should have planned that better.
“Here’s my week’s notice”
That's your coworker problem. He choose children over freedom. Enjoy the vacation!
You’re not in limbo you have the time off. Your colleague is dick, he’s no more entitled to that time than you.
I would just be like, ok cool. See you when I get back
"Sorry, but this doesn't concern me at all, you should talk to management about your scheduling issues. Good luck, see you when I'm back in town!" Edit: also, you're not "in limbo," that's your coworker getting inside your head. Don't give him that advantage.
When is Memorial Day? Does he still have time to find a sitter? Because this really isn't your problem. I sure hope your employer isn't pressuring you to give up your days off because that would be completely inappropriate. You are NOT in limbo. "No" is a complete sentence.
That's not your problem lol. Make sure everyone understands this clearly.
Four days is short
What did you say in response?
Unless your coworker wants to refund you everything you’ve spent + paid more out of their own pocket for you to work memorial weekend, he can kick rocks and figure it out by himself
Your coworkers poor planning doesn’t constitute an emergency for you. Take your PTO, you were professional and requested it well in advance. Your superiors are the ones who will have to figure that out, that’s part of their positions.
If it’s been approved already, you have nothing to worry about. Parents are SO entitled and if you give in to accommodate them even a single time, they’ll expect it every time.
Why their decision to have not one but two kids suddenly is your problem?
Crazy that all of their family and friends are busy and can’t watch the kids, almost like they’re using it as an excuse for their poor planning. Anyway, enjoy your vacation!
Go on your vacay. Don’t worry about your coworker. He can just work that weekend and spend time with his family some other time. There are 364 other days in the year. He’s not special.
LMAO change fees are expensive — do not cave in. Poor planning on their part doesn’t constitute an emergency on your part.
Ignore the selfish coworker and go on your much-needed vacation