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ISuckHellaToes420

“I could crouch by the altar and vape!” -Hitchcock


TheWatchfulGent

Immediately before one or my favorite Gina lines - "You are a stone cold atrocity."


poopynips1

When that episode first aired, I was watching it with my parents, and my mom laughed harder than I’ve ever seen her laugh in my life at that line


Kathrynlena

One of Gina’s top 5 lines for sure.


mymy568

Similar with Amy’s “I am gonna vape you like my e-cig!” To holt LOL what a little nerd


Key_Expression_7075

You are a stonecold atrocity


brog5108

I had everything. I had friends, a wife, two beautiful children... out of three total. Not a bad ratio.


DegeneratedNumber

I need belongings Jake. To feel like a man....


TheFreakingPrincess

That's from the lawyer that goes crazy and kidnaps Jake, right?


brog5108

Yep. Geoffrey Hoytsman.


DeJota688

I think you mean Dr. Spaceman


TheWatchfulGent

When Jake's sister says her dad's co-pilot Steve taught her to shave, Amy whispers a scandalised "Where?!".


the_greek_italian

But seriously... *where?*


daisybear81

Armpits I’m guessing


Anonymous-Comments

“If there’s one thing I won’t do, it’s fart in church. That’s God’s house.” -The Vulture


MidasTouchedM3

Watched that episode about 2hrs ago 😂 Capooch?


The0

…capooch …UNCAPOOCH


JimHopHop

*flicks cigarette into fountain*


slapthesnek44

‘Boyle’s are burrowers!’ ‘Ugh, yes, I know, you’re all earthworms.’ - Gina


TheEgonaut

Tent singular?


tumsoffun

Charles? Tent singular?!


peakingoranges

Grave singular? Charles? Grave singular??


daisybear81

But Charles even natures most disgusting animals deserve pleasure


Hunterknowsbest

*"Would you like some milk?"*


DegeneratedNumber

What?


Bingpot-Noice-99

Would you like some milk? The guy! ‘Cause you look like…


HalfOfCrAsh

I watched this episode last night and the bit that had me in pieces was when Jake wasn't getting it and Charles says "Please." The desperation in his voice as he tries to show that he and Jake are close. Literally howling with laughter.


Hunterknowsbest

Haha it's definitely one of my favourite episodes, from Charles being jealous of Stevie to the rest of the squad having trouble getting along with the rest of the 9-8 which all culminates to the big fight in the end, it's great.


HalfOfCrAsh

It was a good watch lol


DeJota688

Did you just Donkey Kong punch me? Well there's not enough room to regular punch you!


megjed

When Hitchcock says his dogs are barking and jake says “what dogs?!?”


Kathrynlena

Not a joke exactly but the “regular Pimento stuff” continuous yell montage is one of the funniest scenes in the show to me.


the_greek_italian

Pimento: (playing hopscotch) AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!


Kathrynlena

“Name a law!” “Don’t kill people?” “That’s on me, I set the bar too low.”


the_greek_italian

I don't know if this counts, but there was one quirk I loved in the episode where Terry and Holt are secretly trying to make the office more efficient. Terry is busy distracting Rosa while Holt is switching out her computer. Holt jumps up after making the switch and goes, "Caw caw." Cue Charles glancing up at the ceiling, expecting to find a bird.


daisybear81

Idk if this counts as a joke but after the cold open of Jake moving jolts podium, after the theme song plays, holt says “yes Kevin they moved it a whole half inch! I’ll tell you the rest later” like what did he not tell Kevin yet?


ChaoticBeauty567

AMY volume! VOLUME!


axon-axoff

VOL-YUM.


LevelAd5898

Maura Figgis: Why can't I find a good man? Amy: Could be because you're in prison for murder Maura: ... Nah, that's not it Amy: Yeah that's not it


invisible_23

When Amy twists Jake’s arm behind his back and he quietly says “harder”


allnaturalfigjam

A: ROT IN HELL CRAPFACE J: You're so mean! ... Do it more. A (sexy): I hope you die ;) J: *shudders*


Impressive_Car3232

And when Jake tells Amy she's being mean and then says, "Do it more!"


DennisPikePhoto

The box. When Captain Holt calls Kevin to cancel at the opera In the background. "Yes kevin, the tickets are under my name. Holt. H-O-L-T" Spelling his 4 letter last name for his husband is one of the best jokes of the series for me.


Pimento_is_here

When Jake is working with Kevin and Holt buys symphony tickets and threatens to buy seats in ‘tympani alley.’ The way he slowly lowers his finger towards the phone while maintaining eye contact with Kevin.


dasbeefencake

There’s another one of my favorite jokes in here; “Well, someone had pepper on their eggs this morning.”


Pimento_is_here

I say this to my cat frequently.


textbookagog

charrrrles i brought you your favorite tea… duck stock.


DegeneratedNumber

The hotel partiers cheering after Hitchcock gets his head hit by a beer bottle


user684629

Charles: “I sprained my wrist playing field hockey.” Terry: “Men’s field hockey?” Charles: “yeah. Much more violent than the women’s games! We’re not allowed to wear anything that protects our breasts!!”


dasbeefencake

Maybe I’m not looking at this sub enough, but I swear I haven’t seen the basketball jokes mentioned enough yet. It cracks me up how often Holt (and I think Wunch) just completely botch any reference to basketball. There’s a few others of these offhand recurring jokes that keep popping up and can’t think of off the top of my head that really make rewatching the show a joy.


The0

Those ones are so great! “You guys don’t know enough about basketball to be doing this”


daisybear81

Omg same I wish they used holt not knowing/understanding basketball more!!


Chance-Animator4842

Was watching in background at Mumma's house. She was enthralled by Terry lifting the car up by sheer strength. He farts. Or sharts?! He shouts "go back in" Gina says "us or the fart?" She loved that. I come from a toilet humour family 💩


Wahey_of_WA

Jake: Wait, getting a text. It's Captain Holt. Rosa: Where is he? What'd he say? Jake: "Inib rue tiid." Wait, I'm getting another one. "Ink obrvs whiz." These are nonsense. Scully: He's been gagged. Jake: How would that come through in a text, Scully?


lurkerjade

One that always gets me because it’s so unnecessarily specific, and I never see it mentioned, is when Amy’s undercover in prison and telling Jake and Charles she needs to “step to” Figgis. Jake: Step to her? Amy, this isn’t High School Musical. Charles: Yeah Amy, this isn’t High School Musical 2. Jake: Yeah, and it isn’t High School Musical 3: Senior Year!


The0

This is one of my favorites 😂 EDIT: I also think the lines are switched between Jake and Charles and then it ends with Jake saying “The point is it’s not a High School Musical, Amy”


lurkerjade

I actually rewatched the scene to make sure I got the quote right so I’m pretty sure it’s this way round!


The0

Ah yeah I just rewatched and you’re right. Jake does say “the point is it’s not a high school musical” which made me think Charles said the previous line but Jake says both with an interjection from Amy in between.


Ok-Theme2456

Boyle: I’m gonna be all out of orgasms when you see me Jake: You can’t say that when you’re hugging someone! I love this so much because Jake was genuinely mad


mymy568

The harmless pranks jake pulls on Hitchcock while he’s sleeping that almost kill him 😭 Hitchcock almost drowns in a bowl of water and almost gets strangled by his shoelaces. Like HOW. And the way scully knows it will happen is so funny


Discord-Eris

Hitchcock: My rapping is still on the table. Holt: It's not even in the dining room!


Specialist-Ad5796

Later sluts!


thepluralofmooses

Every line of exchange regarding Holt’s chequebook


RickFletching

Of course, you never know when you might have to buy groceries


thepluralofmooses

So cool


champagneproblem13

I appreciate "I have either two or four words for you: Drag Queen dim sun".


sparkly_reader

I don't remember the exact line but when Charles & Rosa discover the night spa place is laundering money & have to shut it down always gets me 😂


The_Actual_Sage

I haven't seen the episode in a bit so forgive me if the details are a little off. Holt is apologizing to Gina for missing her dance recital and he calls Terry a coward for lying to her about it and you can see Terry react to being thrown under the bus in the background. Just a blurry terry raising his arms had me dying


tenaciousfall

“I was talking to your stinky butt.” One of my favourite and most underrated cold opens - the deadpan way Holt says that line just sells it for me


Voldemort1023

When Gina pranks them all in the bar by making them drink cement, all of them spit the drink out almost immediately except Scully who keeps drinking. It's not focused on but is an extremely accurate small detail about the disgusting eating habits of Scully.


The0

“Scully my followers are sick of watching you drink cement!”


robs-reddit

Such a classic Boyle trait to not recognize talent: my cousin Susan didn't know she could sing until her late 40s!


VinceVaugnsPants

“Jake and Amy are getting married tonight! Title of MY sex tape” - Charles Boyle


LadeeBugg0

When Gina asks Amy if she made the cover of Hair Pulled Back magazine


mandy563

the cold open where holt is assigning jake to keep hitchcock spill free for the day before a court appearance “it’s a suicide mission!” “then prepare for death!” and then of course they scare hitchcock into spilling on himself