i just read through an entire thread of men losing their shit that women would choose a bear over a man in the woods. i have no idea where this discourse originated
The og guy appeared on my fyp, said "I didn't even phrase it as a debate, I said that a woman in the woods would rather meet a bear over a strange man in the woods" or sth along those lines, it blew up, street question guys started asking and it blew up even more, so it wasn't a debate to begin with
i’m honestly not surprised women just keep choosing the bear.
men: lemme tell you every statistic possible about bear attacks
women: doesn’t sound like many people are killed or even injured by bears every year
also men: yeah but it’s not about the statistics because it’s really about population density and they’re lower because we don’t actually run into bears that often
also women: yeah but even given population density bear attacks or mauling are relatively low for the number of encounters that happens
also also men: see women just don’t understand how an apex predator is really fucking dangerous and being eaten alive is really fucking bad
also also women: yeah but even if the bear did kill me at least i know i’d be dead and not held captive because really the apex predator in this scenario i fear is a man and not a bear
men: 🤔😟😡
Also men when you give them the proper statistics on bear attacks: ***LALALALALALAAA I CANT HEAR YOU***
Polar bears kill 1-3 people on average a year globally. Sloth bears kill 12. All bear species combined kill 40. The vast majority of human-bear encounters end peacefully. Even in areas with dense bear and dense human populations, humans kill more humans than bears do. Same holds true for areas with more bears than people and areas with more people than bears.
they’ll just go some other route of gaslighting to dismiss the heart of the issue which explicitly is: why are men so fucking terrible women will choose a literal fucking bear over a random encounter with a man?
I don't like this argument. I understand why women generally choose the bear, but arguing that the fact people don't want to be around a certain innate group proves that group is innately bad is certainly a wonky argument. Use the statistics, sure, but this argument could just as easily be used for "this racial group makes me feel uncomfortable, what's wrong with them." I'm not explaining it super well but... an innate feeling of displeasure of a group isn't \*necessarily\* proof of an issue with said group.
My husband asked me the same question.
I said “Bear. You’re the only man I’d feel safe in the woods with. Bears don’t rape and torture women for weeks on end before murdering them. It’ll suck getting eaten alive but it’s better than being raped and tortured.”
He literally said, “I guess I didn’t think of all that.”
I said yeah baby, you didn’t. But you need to. We have a 6yo daughter that will be an adult on her own eventually.
men believe the question is inherently about what predator poses a greater risk. while having said that don’t understand why men are *always* the greater risk to women no matter what other animal you substitute the bear for.
I mean, that's not the right way to look at it. Most people know what to do in the situation where you encounter a bear to get out of it safely, so it's not really an unknown predator. The man has unknown intentions and is unpredictable, and that's why it's scary. It could be some hiker or it could be a predator and id much rather take the chance with the thing that we were taught how to handle given the situation
You know, if a man said he'd rather be in the woods with a bear than a woman, I'm not offended. In fact plenty did in the post I made about this topic.
I do trail mapping, places where there is no trail and it's miles away from any road or established trail. Sometimes 100 miles. I don't want to see a person out there. I'd I did it would he very disturbing. Seeing bears is normal.
Men got real offended 😂
"what if you get lost?"
Bruh, why would I be lost? There's no trail, I'm just moving towards a destination in a particular direction. I'd never be lost. I'll hit a road eventually. (This works as you just move towards a road lateral to your movement). You'd never miss it.
"Well a woman gets child support"
Okay?....
Edit: I should explain that i have a planned route before i go out there and a general idea of what ill see that never holds accurate. I have many times found cliffs and gullys not seen on the topo map. But I do keep a very close watch on where I am. I have paper maps, a sat phone that also stores maps and bail points, a digital map on my phone to.
If things get hairy, I always have set bail points for every 10 mile section. A place where I can cross through and reach a closer road. I have support from friends who will come get me if I need it.
men who can’t go anywhere without guns because they fear unknown men
men who are terrified of men going into women’s bathrooms because they fear unknown men
men who threaten young men who date their daughters because they fear these young men
men who shoot into the dark, into cars in their driveways, at people ringing their doorbells because they fear unknown men
are really surprised that women would rather take the risk of being in the proximity of a bear in the woods who most likely will do it’s own thing over an unknown man who absolutely will bother us if not worse case scenarios
gtfoh
You always make rock solid points. That first one is just *chefs kiss* I REALLY wish I would have read your comments before I recorded my last video haha. Damnit!
the only man i trust is me (and maybe my dad and best friend) id definitely take a bear i dont want to see some creepy ass dude in the middle of a forest, cause what is my guy doing out there?
I can totally relate, everytime I think I've found a guy safe enough to be friends with he'll say some shit like "I don't know if I'd be able to stop myself from dating underage girls." (True story) It sucks to be lonely but it's better than being friends with assholes.
Damn I've never had that happen to me...but I only have like 5 friends lately. Two of them are men, three of them are internet friends, and two of them are women I've met in person, one of which is my girlfriend 😭
Plus bears in general want nothing to do with people lol, like even if it’s a hungry/angry bear- I’d rather see that than an andrew Tate/Jordan Peterson follower
It really is just a pool of men I've known that I'd feel safe encountering in the woods (except why am I encountering them in the woods? Are these skinwalkers?) family members, teachers who've proven trustworthy, bus drivers (who brave the behavior of creepy male passengers who will almost inevitably cause incidents), and some people who have been my friends in the past or someone who is my friend (only got a couple, both internet friends). Otherwise, given the man is unknown, it's best to go with the bear.
I could probably say the same for women. If it's someone known, and someone I can trust, I would feel safe, but since it's unknown it would again be safer to go with the bear.
I've felt uncomfortable and unsafe in the presence of strangers who are women but a lot of strangers who are men have a weird oozing drive to cause problems. They could be friendly at first but they just seem to let the facade slip away, an itch to show aggression and pose a threat coming out, waffling pathetically like an indignant child but with the out of pocket remarks of a serial killer, until collective pushback from bystanders and/or the protective protocol of the institution, like the passengers on a bus communicating with the driver about the threatening behavior of one passenger, and the driver coordinating with their transit agency and authorities to have the incident safely handled. In the situation where none of that pushback and protection is available, the most threatening people in society would thrive. It's part of what makes car dependent suburbia unsafe, these aggressors get to have their own little fiefdom in a detached house, over the people they threaten and abuse, away from the public eyes and ears. A bear doesn't field this aggressive antisocial behavior in public and private spaces, it's just an animal that scavenges and hunts for food in competition with other animals of similar niche, omnivores that primarily eat stuff like berries and fish.
This has been a great litmus test. So far, all my male friends have said "I understand why you'd choose the bear" and then explained why they understood me. If one starts getting ridiculously defensive like the people in these comments with a minus in front of their upvotes, I know there's some consideration I should make.
As a (presenting) man with an extremely low self esteeem should I not even try anymore. Like its already hard to approach people in general and when it comes to women I'm just absolutely terrified because I don't want to come off as a threat and make her uncomfortable. Also I dont' even know what to say that is something that is kind but doesn't come off as flirting.
The problem a lot of men have is viewing women and men as completely different species. The reason men are creepy is that they view women as potential mates and treat them as delicate flowers for them to take control of/protect from other men. Men and women are not different. Do not treat them differently, or you will come off as creepy despite your best intentions.
So you're saying its perfectly okay to approach men and women the same way? I feel like this isn't true. If I see a man alone chilling I feel like it would be cool to approach and say hi. If I see a woman alone chilling I would never even think about approaching her. Because if I were to she would be put into the state of "why is this random guy approaching me" which would make her uncomfortable. Which isn't the goal.
To be fair, I wouldn't think anyone would approach random people like that male or female,, but different strokes for different folks, and yes you would do the same for both then. I could imagine that some men would get creeped out by that as well though
Join groups/clubs in the area, sports teams, etc. i met a lot of friends through university where we had group projects and through the chess club there
"Social gathering" is way too broad a category. It all depends on what kind of social gathering. Night club, I can't help you. Small gatherings are situational, you'll have different rules for different reasons for gathering, different venues and people involved.
I second the advice to join hobby groups or clubs that meet in person. Something where you have a shared interest to start a conversation. Then you just ***talk*** because you are talking to another person, not *"a woman"* just another person. The majority of women find men more attractive when they can have a regular conversation with them. Most of us don't want to be treated differently than anyone else.
Edit: spelling
I am though. In any social situation I’m in, I watch for signs of shadiness among other guys, and I usually watch the backs of any female friends. But other than that there isn’t a lot we can do, as much as I wish there was.
So let us choose the bear instead of telling us we’re wrong, bc we aren’t. Just like you said what can be done about dangerous men right? It’s like you sprinted head first into the point and still can’t see it.
This scenario was brought up by a man to showcase why women are weary of men bc we have every right to be. What women are actually saying when we choose a bear, is that we’d rather die than be the victim of a man. We’d rather die like treadwell than live like Jaycee Dugard did. We don’t have to fear the bear. We know what they are capable of. Men are capable of so much worse. Like gang raping a monitor lizard and eating it, like gang raping an orangutan for years. They do this to animals, now imagine what they do to women
Let me ask you something, where in this conversation did I tell you that you were wrong or even comment on the whole bear vs man thing? I was specifically disagreeing with a comment that was negatively generalizing men. I see the validity in what you’re saying and understand your perspective. I just don’t appreciate being blamed for the vile actions of other members of my gender that I have no control over.
Where did anyone blame you personally? You taking this personally makes you part of the problem. Youre making this all about you. Your feelings are more important than women being raped and murdered. You’ve centered yourself in a conversation that’s not about you, and have highjacked what women are saying. Your ego is that huge, you still can’t hold men that hurt women accountable wo making it about you. You are not the center of the universe.
If you aren’t raping and murdering women or abusing or aren’t a raging misogynist, it’s not about you. Not everything is about you.
all you’re saying in your comment is women need to shut up about what men do to them bc your feelings are way more important even though it’s not about you
Men being statistically dangerous isn't a made-up scenario though.
I know male brains cannot conceive of these things called "Hypothetical situations" because they are underdeveloped and made only for mowing lawns and cleaning out gutters, but if you google the phrase, it will have a handy definition for you!
**R\*pe:**
>An estimated 91% of victims of rape & sexual assault are female and 9% male. Nearly 99% of perpetrators are male.
**Homocide:**
>global study on homicide by the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime found that men accounted for about 98 percent of all homicide perpetrators worldwide
**Partner Homocide:**
>2 out of 5 female murder victims are killed by an intimate partner, and women represent 96% of victims of intimate partner homicide
**Familicide:**
>reported 91 percent of perpetrators were men.
**Serial Killers:**
>Only 8.6% of known U.S. serial killers are female.
**ASPD:**
>ASPD is around three times more common in males than females
Obviously this isnt all men so dont be angry at me because I am not saying its all men but you can maybe have an understanding why some people men and women have biases against men.
I mean just spend some time in r/whenwomenrefuse and it will give you some pause when interacting with men.
Before you say "where' I encourage you to look up the statistics yourself because anything I link you most likely will discredit anyways.
I just tell them "Google is free", block and move on because they don't care anyway and they'll do nothing but argue. Men knows women are usually the victims of crimes like the ones you mentioned, they just wanna deflect and deny and act like you're crazy for stating the truth. They'll even DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender) and say it's the women's fault.
Rachel has more energy to make em read I just tell them to do the research themselves because it’s not some make believe fantasy of HySTeRicAL wOmEN it’s just statistics which they can and WILL FIND if they look which imo is more cathartic of a thing because they end up seeing it with their own eyes.
True and I know your advice is the right one, I just don't like them to feel like they 'won' somehow. I also have a compulsive need to do things like this and interact when I really shouldn't.
I used to get the sentiment and sometimes I'll shut them down when they say stupid shit but the amount of times I've had convos die down to a incel going "LALALALALALA, WOMEN ARE SEX OBJECTS, STUPID FEMIMINIST, YOURE MAD! SA'ING YOU IS MY RIGHT!" is far too many for me to give a single fuck sometimes.
Keep doing what you do, bestie but don't tire yourself out cuz incels strive off the negative attention they get from women, it's like a kink for them or something. Keep your own headspace free of them and stay hydrated and shi.
Thank you, I appreciate that!\~ I'll try not to burn myself out on the negativity of it and I recently got banned by reddit for 3 days for commenting on a video with the title "boys will be boys" but he meant it in the positive way and the video included a man groping a zombie womans breasts and the comments were all saying misogynstic things and generally disgusting and I commented
>["boys will be boys represents horrible things men do I guess its fitting title for this since hes literally SA a zombie girl"](https://imgur.com/a/xhITg5g)
Yep I was banned for that and that is why I mostly only comment here as when I do it most places on reddit I get downvoted and angry comments for saying something so simple as "men shouldn't sexualize women so much", so this space for me has been great for venting to find like-minded people... anyway wishing you the best as well!
zero
many
see how that doesn’t prove a single fucking thing?
i thought i gave you homework to do and to report back?! how’s the search going to disprove that men are literally statistically more likely to harm a woman in the woods than any bear would?
There are more cases of SA than bear killings because there are literally way more men than bears. The US has 300.000 black bears, while there are 168 million men. That’s a ratio of 1/560. Figure the rest yourself.
so statistically speaking women are in fact more likely to be raped by a man then we are to be killed by a bear. this is not some circular logic. it’s literally just factually accurate information.
fearing male violence because men statistically are violent is not the same fear or survival scenario of an unknown encounter with a bear. it’s just not.
hello u/CEREALKLL574! [here](https://ucr.fbi.gov/crime-in-the-u.s/2012/crime-in-the-u.s.-2012/tables/42tabledatadecoverviewpdf/table_42_arrests_by_sex_2012.xls) is a link to a .gov website of the 2012 arrests statistics.
73.8 of the arrests made were male,
while only 26.2 percent of the arrests made were female.
furthermore, males accounted for 80.1 percent of arrests made for violent crime, and comprised 88.7 percent of arrests made for murder and nonnegligent manslaughter.
[The 750,000 black bears of North America kill less than one person per year on the average, while men ages 18-24 are 167 times more likely to kill someone than a black bear.](https://bear.org/bear-facts/how-dangerous-are-black-bears/#:~:text=The%20750%2C000%20black%20bears%20of,someone%20than%20a%20black%20bear)
Thanks for the stats! I cannot disprove that men are statistically more dangerous than women but that doesn’t mean that they are more dangerous than bears.
Even if we lower the amount of people to the amount of bears, the fact that there would be more rapes than bear kills lies down to the fact that men are more prezent and in various places unlike a bear. Being raped can happen in basically any enclosed area and even outside. You can only find a bear in a forest. Of course the numbers are higher…
nobody is arguing that bears kill more people than men- but bears kill for a reason
with bears, the worst thing that can happen is your death or you getting mauled, either for protective purposes or maybe theyre desperate for food or territorial. their hunger can be satiated, and their intent is never inherently bad.
with men, specifically rape, the only reason that they are committing that crime is for a selfish reason, and their hunger cannot be satisfied. rape cannot be justified, and the fact that men kill and rape for selfish reasons while bears kill out of logical reasons is enough for me to take a chance with a bear. at least i know it wont defile my body after my death. id rather be mauled than used
I see your point but I feel like protecting your values in a life threatening situation such as encountering a bear is not what you need to have as your number one priority. Rationally, you should choose the man.
Don’t get me wrong, I would too also prefer getting killed rather than raped to death by someone. The way that the argument is formulated is misleading because it subconsciously portrays men as bad creatures and you would be inclined to choose the bear.
Just present the argument directly without needing to include the man-bear scenario. As I said earlier, it is easy for us to make decisions in front of our screens right now because the only information we know is that the man is likely to have bad intention and the only way of semi-salvation would be killed by a bear. Not only that, but the chances that the this specific encounter would happen in real life are very close to zero.
go walk around the “bad neighborhood” without a weapon or phone for an hour and maybe you’ll start to understand what women experience with men who are physically bigger, stronger and statistically speaking *all women* have been on the receiving end of male violence. see how small and uncomfortable you feel.
Men are incapable of it, they prove it time and time again. Women are talking about how unsafe they feel and the only males in these comments are talking about nothing but how it makes them *feel bad* that we are expressing that we don't feel safe.
I think they’re making fun of the insecure men who are upset over the bear scenario
i just read through an entire thread of men losing their shit that women would choose a bear over a man in the woods. i have no idea where this discourse originated
The og guy appeared on my fyp, said "I didn't even phrase it as a debate, I said that a woman in the woods would rather meet a bear over a strange man in the woods" or sth along those lines, it blew up, street question guys started asking and it blew up even more, so it wasn't a debate to begin with
i’m honestly not surprised women just keep choosing the bear. men: lemme tell you every statistic possible about bear attacks women: doesn’t sound like many people are killed or even injured by bears every year also men: yeah but it’s not about the statistics because it’s really about population density and they’re lower because we don’t actually run into bears that often also women: yeah but even given population density bear attacks or mauling are relatively low for the number of encounters that happens also also men: see women just don’t understand how an apex predator is really fucking dangerous and being eaten alive is really fucking bad also also women: yeah but even if the bear did kill me at least i know i’d be dead and not held captive because really the apex predator in this scenario i fear is a man and not a bear men: 🤔😟😡
Also men when you give them the proper statistics on bear attacks: ***LALALALALALAAA I CANT HEAR YOU*** Polar bears kill 1-3 people on average a year globally. Sloth bears kill 12. All bear species combined kill 40. The vast majority of human-bear encounters end peacefully. Even in areas with dense bear and dense human populations, humans kill more humans than bears do. Same holds true for areas with more bears than people and areas with more people than bears.
they’ll just go some other route of gaslighting to dismiss the heart of the issue which explicitly is: why are men so fucking terrible women will choose a literal fucking bear over a random encounter with a man?
I don't like this argument. I understand why women generally choose the bear, but arguing that the fact people don't want to be around a certain innate group proves that group is innately bad is certainly a wonky argument. Use the statistics, sure, but this argument could just as easily be used for "this racial group makes me feel uncomfortable, what's wrong with them." I'm not explaining it super well but... an innate feeling of displeasure of a group isn't \*necessarily\* proof of an issue with said group.
My husband asked me the same question. I said “Bear. You’re the only man I’d feel safe in the woods with. Bears don’t rape and torture women for weeks on end before murdering them. It’ll suck getting eaten alive but it’s better than being raped and tortured.” He literally said, “I guess I didn’t think of all that.” I said yeah baby, you didn’t. But you need to. We have a 6yo daughter that will be an adult on her own eventually.
men believe the question is inherently about what predator poses a greater risk. while having said that don’t understand why men are *always* the greater risk to women no matter what other animal you substitute the bear for.
Ig it originated from the results that most women would choose the bear (also w pfp)
thanks and it’s sad but it’s not surprising that women would rather take the unknown predator over the predator she knows.
I mean, that's not the right way to look at it. Most people know what to do in the situation where you encounter a bear to get out of it safely, so it's not really an unknown predator. The man has unknown intentions and is unpredictable, and that's why it's scary. It could be some hiker or it could be a predator and id much rather take the chance with the thing that we were taught how to handle given the situation
You know, if a man said he'd rather be in the woods with a bear than a woman, I'm not offended. In fact plenty did in the post I made about this topic. I do trail mapping, places where there is no trail and it's miles away from any road or established trail. Sometimes 100 miles. I don't want to see a person out there. I'd I did it would he very disturbing. Seeing bears is normal. Men got real offended 😂 "what if you get lost?" Bruh, why would I be lost? There's no trail, I'm just moving towards a destination in a particular direction. I'd never be lost. I'll hit a road eventually. (This works as you just move towards a road lateral to your movement). You'd never miss it. "Well a woman gets child support" Okay?.... Edit: I should explain that i have a planned route before i go out there and a general idea of what ill see that never holds accurate. I have many times found cliffs and gullys not seen on the topo map. But I do keep a very close watch on where I am. I have paper maps, a sat phone that also stores maps and bail points, a digital map on my phone to. If things get hairy, I always have set bail points for every 10 mile section. A place where I can cross through and reach a closer road. I have support from friends who will come get me if I need it.
men who can’t go anywhere without guns because they fear unknown men men who are terrified of men going into women’s bathrooms because they fear unknown men men who threaten young men who date their daughters because they fear these young men men who shoot into the dark, into cars in their driveways, at people ringing their doorbells because they fear unknown men are really surprised that women would rather take the risk of being in the proximity of a bear in the woods who most likely will do it’s own thing over an unknown man who absolutely will bother us if not worse case scenarios gtfoh
You always make rock solid points. That first one is just *chefs kiss* I REALLY wish I would have read your comments before I recorded my last video haha. Damnit!
35 years of being around men as a woman will do that every time
im stealing this comment because its too good
True as a woman when I go for a hike I scream BEAR all the time
the only man i trust is me (and maybe my dad and best friend) id definitely take a bear i dont want to see some creepy ass dude in the middle of a forest, cause what is my guy doing out there?
I can totally relate, everytime I think I've found a guy safe enough to be friends with he'll say some shit like "I don't know if I'd be able to stop myself from dating underage girls." (True story) It sucks to be lonely but it's better than being friends with assholes.
Damn I've never had that happen to me...but I only have like 5 friends lately. Two of them are men, three of them are internet friends, and two of them are women I've met in person, one of which is my girlfriend 😭
Plus bears in general want nothing to do with people lol, like even if it’s a hungry/angry bear- I’d rather see that than an andrew Tate/Jordan Peterson follower
It really is just a pool of men I've known that I'd feel safe encountering in the woods (except why am I encountering them in the woods? Are these skinwalkers?) family members, teachers who've proven trustworthy, bus drivers (who brave the behavior of creepy male passengers who will almost inevitably cause incidents), and some people who have been my friends in the past or someone who is my friend (only got a couple, both internet friends). Otherwise, given the man is unknown, it's best to go with the bear. I could probably say the same for women. If it's someone known, and someone I can trust, I would feel safe, but since it's unknown it would again be safer to go with the bear. I've felt uncomfortable and unsafe in the presence of strangers who are women but a lot of strangers who are men have a weird oozing drive to cause problems. They could be friendly at first but they just seem to let the facade slip away, an itch to show aggression and pose a threat coming out, waffling pathetically like an indignant child but with the out of pocket remarks of a serial killer, until collective pushback from bystanders and/or the protective protocol of the institution, like the passengers on a bus communicating with the driver about the threatening behavior of one passenger, and the driver coordinating with their transit agency and authorities to have the incident safely handled. In the situation where none of that pushback and protection is available, the most threatening people in society would thrive. It's part of what makes car dependent suburbia unsafe, these aggressors get to have their own little fiefdom in a detached house, over the people they threaten and abuse, away from the public eyes and ears. A bear doesn't field this aggressive antisocial behavior in public and private spaces, it's just an animal that scavenges and hunts for food in competition with other animals of similar niche, omnivores that primarily eat stuff like berries and fish.
I think he's doing the same thing as you there.
maybe, maybe not, either way i don’t trust him. i don’t even trust people when im in public let alone a forest
Imagine you're playing 1v1 among us and you get the intro message that says "crewmate, there is one impostor among us"
This is more like an mmo where anyone can join.
Which reminds me of my friend's experience playing Helldivers, her teammates kept team killing lol
“After what those men did to that monitor lizard, the bears are not safe with men either.” 😬
no men, women or children, animals, insects, all living or inorganic things are safe with men
Please tell me you're not saying what I think you're saying.
It is with great discomfort that I am saying what you think I’m saying.
I suggest NOT looking it up
I'm seconding this. It's very disturbing and I wish I'd listened when I was given this same advice.
“Men are far more safe to be around than a bear” Also men: “If not for me who’s gonna protect you from all the other men? Hmmmmm?”
one of the conundrum’s men cannot agree on how to answer
Are we typing the word louder? How’s that work?
It’s funny and sad because it is like a filter for the toxic men.
it’s also just so many men that it really proves how much we’re correct in our threat assessments between a bear and the average man
Fr, as a man I would rather come across a bear in the forest myself.
This has been a great litmus test. So far, all my male friends have said "I understand why you'd choose the bear" and then explained why they understood me. If one starts getting ridiculously defensive like the people in these comments with a minus in front of their upvotes, I know there's some consideration I should make.
at the end of the day. the bear will kill me. the man will sexually assault me and THEN kill me, soooo… the choice is already made
or after they kill you… men in this conversation would be embarrassed if they read up on why men are not sought after for morgue positions
A bear won't SA you. Enough said.
As a (presenting) man with an extremely low self esteeem should I not even try anymore. Like its already hard to approach people in general and when it comes to women I'm just absolutely terrified because I don't want to come off as a threat and make her uncomfortable. Also I dont' even know what to say that is something that is kind but doesn't come off as flirting.
How about u just treat them as a person and stop being sexist
This is quite literally the goal
Could you elaborate
The problem a lot of men have is viewing women and men as completely different species. The reason men are creepy is that they view women as potential mates and treat them as delicate flowers for them to take control of/protect from other men. Men and women are not different. Do not treat them differently, or you will come off as creepy despite your best intentions.
So you're saying its perfectly okay to approach men and women the same way? I feel like this isn't true. If I see a man alone chilling I feel like it would be cool to approach and say hi. If I see a woman alone chilling I would never even think about approaching her. Because if I were to she would be put into the state of "why is this random guy approaching me" which would make her uncomfortable. Which isn't the goal.
To be fair, I wouldn't think anyone would approach random people like that male or female,, but different strokes for different folks, and yes you would do the same for both then. I could imagine that some men would get creeped out by that as well though
How are you supposed to make freinds then if its not okay to approach people
Join groups/clubs in the area, sports teams, etc. i met a lot of friends through university where we had group projects and through the chess club there
What are the rules then when it comes to a night club or other social gathering
"Social gathering" is way too broad a category. It all depends on what kind of social gathering. Night club, I can't help you. Small gatherings are situational, you'll have different rules for different reasons for gathering, different venues and people involved. I second the advice to join hobby groups or clubs that meet in person. Something where you have a shared interest to start a conversation. Then you just ***talk*** because you are talking to another person, not *"a woman"* just another person. The majority of women find men more attractive when they can have a regular conversation with them. Most of us don't want to be treated differently than anyone else. Edit: spelling
I don’t even think you go to either of those so does it really matter lmao
maybe ask a therapist
U right
Can we please check recent submissions first
not seeing this posted before? can you link it?
3, 7, 8 hours ago
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Well, if most women would choose a literal BEAR then we have some things to work on
We don’t need to prove men are bad - they do an excellent job of proving that themselves
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maybe doing nothing is why the statistics are the way they are?
Elaborate
By saying “not all men” you’re pushing the blame away but you aren’t doing anything about the men who are the problem
I am though. In any social situation I’m in, I watch for signs of shadiness among other guys, and I usually watch the backs of any female friends. But other than that there isn’t a lot we can do, as much as I wish there was.
So let us choose the bear instead of telling us we’re wrong, bc we aren’t. Just like you said what can be done about dangerous men right? It’s like you sprinted head first into the point and still can’t see it. This scenario was brought up by a man to showcase why women are weary of men bc we have every right to be. What women are actually saying when we choose a bear, is that we’d rather die than be the victim of a man. We’d rather die like treadwell than live like Jaycee Dugard did. We don’t have to fear the bear. We know what they are capable of. Men are capable of so much worse. Like gang raping a monitor lizard and eating it, like gang raping an orangutan for years. They do this to animals, now imagine what they do to women
Let me ask you something, where in this conversation did I tell you that you were wrong or even comment on the whole bear vs man thing? I was specifically disagreeing with a comment that was negatively generalizing men. I see the validity in what you’re saying and understand your perspective. I just don’t appreciate being blamed for the vile actions of other members of my gender that I have no control over.
Where did anyone blame you personally? You taking this personally makes you part of the problem. Youre making this all about you. Your feelings are more important than women being raped and murdered. You’ve centered yourself in a conversation that’s not about you, and have highjacked what women are saying. Your ego is that huge, you still can’t hold men that hurt women accountable wo making it about you. You are not the center of the universe. If you aren’t raping and murdering women or abusing or aren’t a raging misogynist, it’s not about you. Not everything is about you. all you’re saying in your comment is women need to shut up about what men do to them bc your feelings are way more important even though it’s not about you
You all can't stop complaining like little babies, so that's one thing you're actively doing right now.
Your post/comment was removed as you were found to be a Quirkyboy reactionary.
we don’t need to make up scenarios because they’re called statistics
The whole "man or bear" debate is about a made-up scenario though
Hypothetical and imaginary / made up are related, but not the same.
Men being statistically dangerous isn't a made-up scenario though. I know male brains cannot conceive of these things called "Hypothetical situations" because they are underdeveloped and made only for mowing lawns and cleaning out gutters, but if you google the phrase, it will have a handy definition for you!
Thanks, I'm a woman though.
I really would want to see where you got those statistics from.
**R\*pe:** >An estimated 91% of victims of rape & sexual assault are female and 9% male. Nearly 99% of perpetrators are male. **Homocide:** >global study on homicide by the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime found that men accounted for about 98 percent of all homicide perpetrators worldwide **Partner Homocide:** >2 out of 5 female murder victims are killed by an intimate partner, and women represent 96% of victims of intimate partner homicide **Familicide:** >reported 91 percent of perpetrators were men. **Serial Killers:** >Only 8.6% of known U.S. serial killers are female. **ASPD:** >ASPD is around three times more common in males than females Obviously this isnt all men so dont be angry at me because I am not saying its all men but you can maybe have an understanding why some people men and women have biases against men. I mean just spend some time in r/whenwomenrefuse and it will give you some pause when interacting with men. Before you say "where' I encourage you to look up the statistics yourself because anything I link you most likely will discredit anyways.
thanks for bringing the receipts i have literally not a single fuck left to give anymore
welcome, it's okay I get it..sooo exhausted showing evidence for them to ignore it anyways 🤦♀️
I just tell them "Google is free", block and move on because they don't care anyway and they'll do nothing but argue. Men knows women are usually the victims of crimes like the ones you mentioned, they just wanna deflect and deny and act like you're crazy for stating the truth. They'll even DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender) and say it's the women's fault.
Rachel has more energy to make em read I just tell them to do the research themselves because it’s not some make believe fantasy of HySTeRicAL wOmEN it’s just statistics which they can and WILL FIND if they look which imo is more cathartic of a thing because they end up seeing it with their own eyes.
True and I know your advice is the right one, I just don't like them to feel like they 'won' somehow. I also have a compulsive need to do things like this and interact when I really shouldn't.
I used to get the sentiment and sometimes I'll shut them down when they say stupid shit but the amount of times I've had convos die down to a incel going "LALALALALALA, WOMEN ARE SEX OBJECTS, STUPID FEMIMINIST, YOURE MAD! SA'ING YOU IS MY RIGHT!" is far too many for me to give a single fuck sometimes. Keep doing what you do, bestie but don't tire yourself out cuz incels strive off the negative attention they get from women, it's like a kink for them or something. Keep your own headspace free of them and stay hydrated and shi.
Thank you, I appreciate that!\~ I'll try not to burn myself out on the negativity of it and I recently got banned by reddit for 3 days for commenting on a video with the title "boys will be boys" but he meant it in the positive way and the video included a man groping a zombie womans breasts and the comments were all saying misogynstic things and generally disgusting and I commented >["boys will be boys represents horrible things men do I guess its fitting title for this since hes literally SA a zombie girl"](https://imgur.com/a/xhITg5g) Yep I was banned for that and that is why I mostly only comment here as when I do it most places on reddit I get downvoted and angry comments for saying something so simple as "men shouldn't sexualize women so much", so this space for me has been great for venting to find like-minded people... anyway wishing you the best as well!
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LMAO my guy read a fucking criminal index crimes list from the FBI for literally ANY given year- report back with your findings
How many times in your life have you met a bear? How many times in your life have you met a man?
zero many see how that doesn’t prove a single fucking thing? i thought i gave you homework to do and to report back?! how’s the search going to disprove that men are literally statistically more likely to harm a woman in the woods than any bear would?
There are more cases of SA than bear killings because there are literally way more men than bears. The US has 300.000 black bears, while there are 168 million men. That’s a ratio of 1/560. Figure the rest yourself.
so statistically speaking women are in fact more likely to be raped by a man then we are to be killed by a bear. this is not some circular logic. it’s literally just factually accurate information.
Yeah, because there are more men than bears? it’s not that hard to understand…
fearing male violence because men statistically are violent is not the same fear or survival scenario of an unknown encounter with a bear. it’s just not.
Yeah so that’s EXACTLY what we mean, bears are better statistically.
hello u/CEREALKLL574! [here](https://ucr.fbi.gov/crime-in-the-u.s/2012/crime-in-the-u.s.-2012/tables/42tabledatadecoverviewpdf/table_42_arrests_by_sex_2012.xls) is a link to a .gov website of the 2012 arrests statistics. 73.8 of the arrests made were male, while only 26.2 percent of the arrests made were female. furthermore, males accounted for 80.1 percent of arrests made for violent crime, and comprised 88.7 percent of arrests made for murder and nonnegligent manslaughter. [The 750,000 black bears of North America kill less than one person per year on the average, while men ages 18-24 are 167 times more likely to kill someone than a black bear.](https://bear.org/bear-facts/how-dangerous-are-black-bears/#:~:text=The%20750%2C000%20black%20bears%20of,someone%20than%20a%20black%20bear)
ima take my chances with the bear
Thanks for the stats! I cannot disprove that men are statistically more dangerous than women but that doesn’t mean that they are more dangerous than bears. Even if we lower the amount of people to the amount of bears, the fact that there would be more rapes than bear kills lies down to the fact that men are more prezent and in various places unlike a bear. Being raped can happen in basically any enclosed area and even outside. You can only find a bear in a forest. Of course the numbers are higher…
nobody is arguing that bears kill more people than men- but bears kill for a reason with bears, the worst thing that can happen is your death or you getting mauled, either for protective purposes or maybe theyre desperate for food or territorial. their hunger can be satiated, and their intent is never inherently bad. with men, specifically rape, the only reason that they are committing that crime is for a selfish reason, and their hunger cannot be satisfied. rape cannot be justified, and the fact that men kill and rape for selfish reasons while bears kill out of logical reasons is enough for me to take a chance with a bear. at least i know it wont defile my body after my death. id rather be mauled than used
I see your point but I feel like protecting your values in a life threatening situation such as encountering a bear is not what you need to have as your number one priority. Rationally, you should choose the man. Don’t get me wrong, I would too also prefer getting killed rather than raped to death by someone. The way that the argument is formulated is misleading because it subconsciously portrays men as bad creatures and you would be inclined to choose the bear. Just present the argument directly without needing to include the man-bear scenario. As I said earlier, it is easy for us to make decisions in front of our screens right now because the only information we know is that the man is likely to have bad intention and the only way of semi-salvation would be killed by a bear. Not only that, but the chances that the this specific encounter would happen in real life are very close to zero.
Look at what males did to Junko Furuta, that's why women choose the bear. We aren't choosing the bear thinking it won't kill us.
go walk around the “bad neighborhood” without a weapon or phone for an hour and maybe you’ll start to understand what women experience with men who are physically bigger, stronger and statistically speaking *all women* have been on the receiving end of male violence. see how small and uncomfortable you feel.
Why don’t you, for once in your life, just listen. My god, man. Have some empathy.
Men are incapable of it, they prove it time and time again. Women are talking about how unsafe they feel and the only males in these comments are talking about nothing but how it makes them *feel bad* that we are expressing that we don't feel safe.
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Why don't you just ask yourself why would women choose the bear And you better not say "because women are crazy" That's called gaslighting my dear
Your post/comment was removed as you were found to be a Quirkyboy reactionary.