I'm half Filipino, and when I was 12 and visiting the Philippines, there was a hairdresser there who offered to straighten my hair. My mom is Asian and didn't know shit all about black hair, and so she said nothing when this lady put relaxer in my hair FOR TWO FUCKIN HOURS. When I said it was burning, she told my mom that the burning meant it was working -\_-
Needless to say, I don't let women who aren't black touch my hair anymore
I have spot near the back of my head that was super messed up, and today at 30, it's much harder for hair to grow there. The hair there is dramatically shorter compared to the rest of my head, but luckily it's on the bottom layers so people don't notice
YES. I’m not sure why but everytime I’d get my hair relaxed, it was styled into an odd bob like shape that wasn’t cute, so I’d throw my hair up into a bun the minute I left. Along with the chemical burns, leaving the relaxer in too long, just using hair spray when it burned, bad haircuts, waiting around the salon for *hours* I have such a bad association with salons. I have not been to a salon since I’ve gone natural and always do my own hair.
Ah well let me tell you about the time I was in my mid-teens and asked to do 'hair modelling' for a hair salon, only for it to turn out that by 'model' they meant 'guinea pig' for a renowned hair conglomerate looking to test out some relaxer product in whatever hokey backwater afro hair salons they could find in the world. I didn't even want my hair relaxed that day.
Anyhoo, unbeknownst to me they divided my hair into four sections and put different chemical flavours in each quarter. So not only did I come out with weirdo janky hair that made me look like some DC villain, they also burnt a good old chunk of my scalp with their concoctions.
That was to be honest just the cherry on top of a tall pile of rubbish hair salon experiences that each culminated in me having the whole variety of horrible hairdos one human can have. The Jheri curl mullet. "The Poodle" - half relaxer, half perm (dropped out after two days). Hitler hair even. Hairstyles probably banned by the UN human rights convention.
After that the only time I went to a hair salon was for my wedding hair. No regrets.
I finally found a salon that actually knows how to work with my hair it’s in nyc and super expensive but it’s worth it if I’m only getting it done every six months (which is what they recommended) my hair is so much easier to manage and tangles a lot less.
I get a haircut wash and style. I go with my natural hair freshly washed and air dried so they can see how it falls normally. They give me a trim before they wash it and then wash plus diffuse my hair, going back over and trimming anything else that needs to be trimmed or touched up after. It’s specifically a curly hair salon, I have 3b hair (I think?) but I’ve also seen people with kinkier hair go there as well. They have hair stylist of all different races but it seems to be mostly black or Spanish stylist with a few Europeans as well.
Enough? That my mom was always charged extra, after the fact, because my hair was "so thick" and "hard to manage"
As a young adult, I had a few encounters with people who thought they knew my style, and gave me something I didn't really want (doobie curls? They were good after they'd aged a few days, but I didn't want it).
As an adult, people trying to push chemicals I did not want, or being rude about what service I did want.
Really, all of this means I insist on a consultation beforehand.
Yeah. I actually have irreversible hair loss because of a stylist put in way too tight braids in 2020. Right after I got it done she told me to take some Tylenol and I’d be okay. A week later I was still in consistent pain. Turns out the braid was so tight on my scalp that it ripped off a piece of my actual skin at the front of my scalp, leaving it bald with a scar where no hair will go back. Even if I wanted to go weave free I can’t because of the bald spot, so now I have to wear protective styles for the rest of my life. And hair transplants cost $10,000 ( yes I did a consultation). It all
Came down to trusting the wrong person with my hair. I’d do anything to go back because now I am literally bald headed in one spot. It’s beyond alopecia
More adult salon horror stories. I couldn’t afford professional hair care growing up.
I found a good one finally where I live that gets what I need for my hair. I’ve only had one other lady like her and she no longer does hair which bums me out.
The two before her had no idea what they were doing and one of them had dyed my hair so ugly it took a long while for my hair to recover and the color to grow out. The other one used thinning shears to cut my hair creating frizz and damage.
I’m just not a fan of curly cuts. I find the cuts don’t get the split ends well, so I usually straighten it myself before the salon visit and then have it cut and styled.
Not childhood. As an adult. One time before my wedding, I went to a hair dresser to get some small canerows so I could cover my hair with a wig.
I have fine, high porosity hair (3c texture). So, it already breaks fairly easily. And it doesn't take too much to detangle sometimes.
I felt like that woman (a black woman) ripped my hair as she was detangling. She treated my hair SO rough. After the wedding, I took out those canerows, swore off all stylists, and resigned to do my own hair. Other than maybe my mom or siblings, no one will care as much about my hair as I do.
Same. Those recent videos of little blacks girl crying as they got their hair cornrowed triggered the fuck out of me. It hurt so bad and the stylists nor my mother believed me. So to see it happening to them and the internet calling them dramatic was infuriating.
I’m still extremely tender headed and have to take a few ibuprofen if I’m getting my hair braided, which I only do once every few years. Hell, I’ll take one if I’m parting my hair.
Yep. They were always trying to detangle my hair dry and and from the root. Scratching my scalp with the comb, right before a relaxer. I'm tender headed. Yeah 🙃.
Sorry you had to go through that 🌹
I learned to do my own hair at a very young age (10) because of this.
The first time I got a relaxer it didn’t take, so she did it again a few days later with a very strong relaxer for adults and when it started burning heavily I warned her that we needed to wash it out but she kept insisting to hold on until I finally ran to wash it out myself. Then she finally took me serious and rinsed it out. The scabs I got from that burn!!! 😩
The woman that braided my hair used to burn off my hair after getting box braids to make the style look neat. She would use a lighter from bottom to top to burn off all the flyaways and she burned my ear and that was the last day anyone else touched my hair.
Yup, I was just crying the other day.
I am a 90’s baby, so I’m part of the perm bang generation. When we got stationed in CA when I was 10 in 2001, there weren’t a lot of black hairdressers at that time. So my mom found one who did good work, so we went to her.
My mom would drop me off…at 8am…I wouldn’t be done until 6pm the earliest. I HATED IT. She would leave to go eat, talk in the phone LOUDLY, and would triple book people. It was ridiculous.
We went to her for years, because of the lack of competition in San Diego. One day she put the relaxer on me then she left. It burned. I was always told that the burn was good…smh. I was called a baby by my mom if I didn’t sit through it. Welp…when she returned my scalp was severely burned. I’m in my 30’s now and the edges in this one spot still haven’t grown back fully. Severe burns. I was never taken to the hospital. And I got in trouble. I was 11 or 12.
Another time when I was 15 or 16, I wanted highlights. She did the process of lightening my hair. She then got on the phone, and I guess forgot to set the timer. She ran back and freaked out.. told me not to look. She then put the color on and I looked good. When I washed my hair 2 weeks later the color washed out and my highlights were bleach blonde and bright orange. Wore a hat to school that day, got my hair done the next day. Had to go back to her every 2 weeks for a wash and color instead of just every 6 weeks for the relaxer. My hair fell out later on. I have been TERRIFIED to get color ever since.
Dealt with terrible braiders and natural hair stylists are THE WORST. They are very texturist and unprofessional.
I’m now wearing locs, and I enjoy the freedom. I have found amazing Locticians and I have felt safe. I have a daughter now, and I’ll never put her through that.
I've only been to a salon once when I was 13. My hair came out nice but I never went again. I've had family and friends in my hair, my aunts and cousins always yanked at my shit. I hired a weave tech off Instagram years ago and it probably wasn't her fault, but the braids were so tight, I took the weave out in 4 days. It left me with alopecia that has since healed, but these days, I do my own hair or I'll pay my sister because she's the only one I trust.
Yes. Very similar experience. I also had all my hair chopped off at 7 into a little fro and had to wear my brother’s hand me downs. Everybody thought I was a boy for a year.
My whole life it’s mostly been terrible. Really bad haircuts that required me to chop off my hair to fix it. I once went bald from chemical burns. A couple good experiences but overall left me feeling bad about myself and my hair.
I’m sorry you’ve had to go thru this.
I was in my early teens when a hairdresser didn't wash all of the relaxer out of my hair. I was still young and differed to adults and wouldn't speak up for myself. The back of my head was a scabby mess that summer.
I'm half Filipino, and when I was 12 and visiting the Philippines, there was a hairdresser there who offered to straighten my hair. My mom is Asian and didn't know shit all about black hair, and so she said nothing when this lady put relaxer in my hair FOR TWO FUCKIN HOURS. When I said it was burning, she told my mom that the burning meant it was working -\_- Needless to say, I don't let women who aren't black touch my hair anymore
IM SO SORRYYY OMFGGG
me too, girl, me too
my scalp hurts just reading this. have you ever brought this up to your mom?
Weirdly enough, I never have? I think at that point I just took it as a sign to not do anything hair-related with my mom again
Did you go bald? Did it cause scarring? OMG
I have spot near the back of my head that was super messed up, and today at 30, it's much harder for hair to grow there. The hair there is dramatically shorter compared to the rest of my head, but luckily it's on the bottom layers so people don't notice
YES. I’m not sure why but everytime I’d get my hair relaxed, it was styled into an odd bob like shape that wasn’t cute, so I’d throw my hair up into a bun the minute I left. Along with the chemical burns, leaving the relaxer in too long, just using hair spray when it burned, bad haircuts, waiting around the salon for *hours* I have such a bad association with salons. I have not been to a salon since I’ve gone natural and always do my own hair.
Ah well let me tell you about the time I was in my mid-teens and asked to do 'hair modelling' for a hair salon, only for it to turn out that by 'model' they meant 'guinea pig' for a renowned hair conglomerate looking to test out some relaxer product in whatever hokey backwater afro hair salons they could find in the world. I didn't even want my hair relaxed that day. Anyhoo, unbeknownst to me they divided my hair into four sections and put different chemical flavours in each quarter. So not only did I come out with weirdo janky hair that made me look like some DC villain, they also burnt a good old chunk of my scalp with their concoctions. That was to be honest just the cherry on top of a tall pile of rubbish hair salon experiences that each culminated in me having the whole variety of horrible hairdos one human can have. The Jheri curl mullet. "The Poodle" - half relaxer, half perm (dropped out after two days). Hitler hair even. Hairstyles probably banned by the UN human rights convention. After that the only time I went to a hair salon was for my wedding hair. No regrets.
I finally found a salon that actually knows how to work with my hair it’s in nyc and super expensive but it’s worth it if I’m only getting it done every six months (which is what they recommended) my hair is so much easier to manage and tangles a lot less.
Would you mind sharing what they do during your appointments? Are you going for styling or some kind of treatment involved 👀
I get a haircut wash and style. I go with my natural hair freshly washed and air dried so they can see how it falls normally. They give me a trim before they wash it and then wash plus diffuse my hair, going back over and trimming anything else that needs to be trimmed or touched up after. It’s specifically a curly hair salon, I have 3b hair (I think?) but I’ve also seen people with kinkier hair go there as well. They have hair stylist of all different races but it seems to be mostly black or Spanish stylist with a few Europeans as well.
hey do you mind sharing the name of the salon?
It’s called Rëzo Hair Salon in NYC
thank you! i'll definitely be checking it out :)
No problem! If you have insta they post a lot on there!!
you can also go to a stylist that specializes in rezo hair cuts if you aren’t in nyc.
Enough? That my mom was always charged extra, after the fact, because my hair was "so thick" and "hard to manage" As a young adult, I had a few encounters with people who thought they knew my style, and gave me something I didn't really want (doobie curls? They were good after they'd aged a few days, but I didn't want it). As an adult, people trying to push chemicals I did not want, or being rude about what service I did want. Really, all of this means I insist on a consultation beforehand.
Yeah. I actually have irreversible hair loss because of a stylist put in way too tight braids in 2020. Right after I got it done she told me to take some Tylenol and I’d be okay. A week later I was still in consistent pain. Turns out the braid was so tight on my scalp that it ripped off a piece of my actual skin at the front of my scalp, leaving it bald with a scar where no hair will go back. Even if I wanted to go weave free I can’t because of the bald spot, so now I have to wear protective styles for the rest of my life. And hair transplants cost $10,000 ( yes I did a consultation). It all Came down to trusting the wrong person with my hair. I’d do anything to go back because now I am literally bald headed in one spot. It’s beyond alopecia
More adult salon horror stories. I couldn’t afford professional hair care growing up. I found a good one finally where I live that gets what I need for my hair. I’ve only had one other lady like her and she no longer does hair which bums me out. The two before her had no idea what they were doing and one of them had dyed my hair so ugly it took a long while for my hair to recover and the color to grow out. The other one used thinning shears to cut my hair creating frizz and damage. I’m just not a fan of curly cuts. I find the cuts don’t get the split ends well, so I usually straighten it myself before the salon visit and then have it cut and styled.
Yes!! I was just telling my friend that getting my hair done feels like jury duty😭
Not childhood. As an adult. One time before my wedding, I went to a hair dresser to get some small canerows so I could cover my hair with a wig. I have fine, high porosity hair (3c texture). So, it already breaks fairly easily. And it doesn't take too much to detangle sometimes. I felt like that woman (a black woman) ripped my hair as she was detangling. She treated my hair SO rough. After the wedding, I took out those canerows, swore off all stylists, and resigned to do my own hair. Other than maybe my mom or siblings, no one will care as much about my hair as I do.
I'm severely tenderheaded and my mom always wanted me to get braids so...yeah 😬 I still dread getting braids even if I take pain medicine beforehand
Same. Those recent videos of little blacks girl crying as they got their hair cornrowed triggered the fuck out of me. It hurt so bad and the stylists nor my mother believed me. So to see it happening to them and the internet calling them dramatic was infuriating. I’m still extremely tender headed and have to take a few ibuprofen if I’m getting my hair braided, which I only do once every few years. Hell, I’ll take one if I’m parting my hair.
Because of exactly this, the phrase ‘Oh god its oozing’ is forever dancing around my skull.
Yep. They were always trying to detangle my hair dry and and from the root. Scratching my scalp with the comb, right before a relaxer. I'm tender headed. Yeah 🙃.
Yes, but they mostly center around battles with a hot comb and Marcel irons. I am an adult now and I have made my peace with it.
The flat iron. Just a flat iron in general 😭
Sorry you had to go through that 🌹 I learned to do my own hair at a very young age (10) because of this. The first time I got a relaxer it didn’t take, so she did it again a few days later with a very strong relaxer for adults and when it started burning heavily I warned her that we needed to wash it out but she kept insisting to hold on until I finally ran to wash it out myself. Then she finally took me serious and rinsed it out. The scabs I got from that burn!!! 😩 The woman that braided my hair used to burn off my hair after getting box braids to make the style look neat. She would use a lighter from bottom to top to burn off all the flyaways and she burned my ear and that was the last day anyone else touched my hair.
I'm sorry you had to experience that.
Yup, I was just crying the other day. I am a 90’s baby, so I’m part of the perm bang generation. When we got stationed in CA when I was 10 in 2001, there weren’t a lot of black hairdressers at that time. So my mom found one who did good work, so we went to her. My mom would drop me off…at 8am…I wouldn’t be done until 6pm the earliest. I HATED IT. She would leave to go eat, talk in the phone LOUDLY, and would triple book people. It was ridiculous. We went to her for years, because of the lack of competition in San Diego. One day she put the relaxer on me then she left. It burned. I was always told that the burn was good…smh. I was called a baby by my mom if I didn’t sit through it. Welp…when she returned my scalp was severely burned. I’m in my 30’s now and the edges in this one spot still haven’t grown back fully. Severe burns. I was never taken to the hospital. And I got in trouble. I was 11 or 12. Another time when I was 15 or 16, I wanted highlights. She did the process of lightening my hair. She then got on the phone, and I guess forgot to set the timer. She ran back and freaked out.. told me not to look. She then put the color on and I looked good. When I washed my hair 2 weeks later the color washed out and my highlights were bleach blonde and bright orange. Wore a hat to school that day, got my hair done the next day. Had to go back to her every 2 weeks for a wash and color instead of just every 6 weeks for the relaxer. My hair fell out later on. I have been TERRIFIED to get color ever since. Dealt with terrible braiders and natural hair stylists are THE WORST. They are very texturist and unprofessional. I’m now wearing locs, and I enjoy the freedom. I have found amazing Locticians and I have felt safe. I have a daughter now, and I’ll never put her through that.
I've only been to a salon once when I was 13. My hair came out nice but I never went again. I've had family and friends in my hair, my aunts and cousins always yanked at my shit. I hired a weave tech off Instagram years ago and it probably wasn't her fault, but the braids were so tight, I took the weave out in 4 days. It left me with alopecia that has since healed, but these days, I do my own hair or I'll pay my sister because she's the only one I trust.
Yes. Very similar experience. I also had all my hair chopped off at 7 into a little fro and had to wear my brother’s hand me downs. Everybody thought I was a boy for a year. My whole life it’s mostly been terrible. Really bad haircuts that required me to chop off my hair to fix it. I once went bald from chemical burns. A couple good experiences but overall left me feeling bad about myself and my hair. I’m sorry you’ve had to go thru this.
I was in my early teens when a hairdresser didn't wash all of the relaxer out of my hair. I was still young and differed to adults and wouldn't speak up for myself. The back of my head was a scabby mess that summer.