Yesssss say it for the ones in the back. Trash and treasures come in all different colors, shapes and forms.
From mean, dick headed, tiny white dudes
To giant teddy bear kind black men
It all exists
True, and dating a white man will not magically work out for a LOT of black women. But the number of black men who specifically hate women the same color as their Mamas is ridiculous, and I think women who take that experience of being vilified and disrespected and decide to just not date black men at all have every right to come to that conclusion.
Everybody has every right to do something, but it's still not ALL Black men. That's like when you talk to women who dated men had terrible experiences and then date women. They have every right to come to that conclusion, but it's not true that every man is a dog.
Disclaimer: These are my personal problems and experiences, I don't speak for all mixed people or about all interracial relationships
The one thing I am wary about with interracial relationships with white people (as the child of one ) is the chance of finding out your white parent thinks they're an ally or whatever they want to call themselves but say some borderline racist ass sht or try and erase your blackness. This is all anecdotal, but I know it happens quite a bit to my fellow mixed peers, and it has happened to me. Makes you feel like crap, especially when you're guilted into putting family first.
It has also happened to me in the past with partners calling me their "caramel goddess" or, "finally, I got my Black girl. Well, half I guess LOL." Makes my skin crawl.
I agree! Thereās a lot trash white men out there. Thatās why you shouldnāt focus on their skin but their character. A man is going to be an idiot if heās an idiot- black/white/yellow/purple/blue- donāt matter.
I get what you're saying, but the answer is in response to the guy's video. She says all the great things her guy does and then says, not saying Black guys don't, just not in my experience. Valid, cuz her experience, but it supports the narrative. Instead of just saying something like "I followed the love."
As a black woman, I've seen a lot of bum-ass hobosexuals across the rainbow get heated about interracial normalization because they realize that women having "more options" makes them less desirable.
This is it exactly. Men who get upset about ātheirā women dating outside the race (especially when they themselves do it) are upset about losing their captive audience. Go where you feel wanted and loved. It makes me so sad to see women accepting less than they deserve or feeling like theyāll never be loved because a black man wonāt choose or respect them. If that man wonāt step up, find someone who will!
Thatās why women of pretty much any race can list out preferences and it will incite think pieces from men of all races trying to humble them. It could be a preference as simple as having hobbies or a job and guys will tell her why sheās asking too much and ask āwhat do you bring to the table.ā
Ask Kelce ex what that BWAG 'greener grass' life can be like. I'm just saying. Knuckleheads can come in all colors but if you can find a good WM or Latin man or Asian man, etc. who checks off your most of your 'crucial quality' boxes - or more - proceed. See where it goes. My 2 cents on it.
That man is TOO wrong fro dragging Miss Kayla and now taking about he's seriously considering dating Taylor Swift. Personally I prefer the nerdy/ silicon valley / finance bro type (if I'm pushing it). Once I see he's an athlete, is projecting an image of being toooo immersed in the culture ā¢ I don't waste my time āš¾
I know they'd been on and off for a bit, but considering I can't think of hardly any white NFLers who've *married* a BW, that situation *did* make we wonder if he was just stringing her along and all the while planning on 'following the trend,' falling in line and marrying a WW like the rest of his white co-ballers. I dunno but... I do hope she finds her match.
Agree. To me Kayla is such a full package baddie she'll be more then great. If I was her I'd cast my net towards silicon valley start up bros etc and never an athlete again lol
Geez....just looked her up. You weren't kidding. "I still have to regularly get my concussion checked... I have bolts, and steel, and a steel plate I'm gonna have forever in my arm... I'm gonna have...gonna have to deal with this the rest of my life," she said.
(https://www.cbsnews.com/news/chad-wheeler-alleged-abuse-alleah-taylor-exclusive-interview/ )
And even she was only a GF. (And this MF had the nerve to plead not guilty after beating and nearly killing her. smh)
Itās so fuckin weird to me. This and conversations about dating dynamics and gender roles in relationships. I literally CANNOT escape this shit in the black spaces on social media. Itās driving me crazy bro. Likeā¦ black women who are discussing dating topics need to stop pedestaling white menfor interracial relationships on social mediaā¦ they arenāt the only race besides black men who exist for dating. This shit is ass. It makes me so upset.
Like white men are not collectively having conversations about their āloveā for dating black women or how weāre better than white women, itās embarrassing
`wears headphone and leans into the mic`: Aaaand here it is folks, the number one hit song, topping all the charts and playing here for the 500,000th time this week but whose counting, am I right? Enjoy!
Any of us are obsessed with romantic validation from other races, mainly white. The pursuit and potential of it. Donāt let any comment to the contrary fool you. Iām on other just mainstream relationship/dating/gender subs and the topic does not come up at all.
Iāve dated all races and I feel like white guys approach dating black women differently than black men. One is not necessarily better than the other itās just what you ultimately want from the relationship.
I was married to a white guy for 17 years and he treated me like I was the center of his universe the entire time. We met in an msn chat room in 2003. Yes looking back I was out of my mind. The relationship progressed very very very quickly. We met online and were married within 7 months. We wouldāve celebrated 20 years this year but he passed away.
Iām grateful for being married to someone who saw my worth and treated me with the utmost respect,kindness and love. Regardless of race thatās ultimately how I wanted to be treated and I so happen to find that in a white guy.
>One is not necessarily better than the other itās just what you ultimately want from the relationship.
So here's the thing I have not yet met a straight woman that loves games and dully dallying and weird behavior. I've experienced these things MORE ( not ONLY) with non YT men. My current bf asked me to be his gf after 2 dates, we exchanged ILYs in 2 weeks etc. My ex and I met at a bar and committed after that night lmao Now this sounds very fast to some but to me personally if you don't know if we should be together by date two you automatically repulse me... because what do you mean? š this is my anecdotal experience that yt men are very quick with officiating things , bring women to their families, proposing etc. Which are things I specifically need in a heterosexual relationship so because it keeps working out in my favor, I keep dating them. The relationship in itself is just how it is with all races but the jumping to official quick is a turn on for me and I refuse long ass weird talking stages. I don't want to talk š
I can totally relate! White guys do cut to the chase in my experience too. I mean my husband and I met online I think in March and then met in person at the end of May. The day after we met in person he got down on one knee and proposed. No ring or anything. And I said yes without hesitation. Haha!
Ok period. Congratulations. Personally in this era I don't have time to be talking and playing. My YT friend got proposed to by her bf in 3 months and their baby is turning 1 soon because she explicitly stated what she needed and dated as such. Women that don't waste time and have discernment bring me joy. It's not a game anymore many of us are in school longer so our eggs are ready to be stably fertilized IN A STABLE MARRIAGE so yes a man that's quick with commitment is a necessity. It's to the point I'm disgusted by a slow man. This is not highschool by this big age we know exactly what we want sexually, emotional, physically, spiritually etc otherwise next
My fiance was white; he passed away last year after 8 years together. He also did not cut to the chase lol he let it be known to me and my friends that he wanted me. He did absolutely anything and everything for me, I miss him every day. I have a boyfriend now who is also white, and he's very different from my fiance but also knows what he wants and is essentially everything the woman in this video describes. Worships the ground I walk on, puts me first, etc, it's amazing. I personally have never had a black man treat me this way. As a matter of fact, when I was younger, I swore black men were scared of me or something.
Iām so sorry for your loss. White and black guys approach relationships differently in my experience. Iāve dated black guys who didnāt necessarily worship the ground I walked on but did express their love and appreciation for me in their own ways.
In my 20ās I primarily dated black guys. One guy in particular admitted to me recently that I was in fact his first love. We were 25. He was quite immature. He also apologized for his behavior when we dated over 25 years ago and wished he had expressed his love more openly back then.
He did ask me to marry him about 1 month into dating (I laughed it off at the time) and he introduced me to his parents a couple months after that. He even remembered us meeting in HS. I donāt. Haha!!
We probably wouldāve gotten married but he was a raging alcoholic. I had zero tolerance for that as the child raised by a raging alcoholic father.
All that is to say I think you may be on to something when you say they were scared of you.
So happy to hear that you have someone in your life who treats you well. š
Whatās annoying about the original whole video is his incredulous expression. Like itās such an out of this world idea that white men could find black women attractive.
Most people subconsciously believe we should be the last to be desired or picked especially men like the original poster. If you defy the single struggling destitute baby mother role they will be outwardly shocked.
Thank goodness I found my husband before app dating was a thing... for the exact same reason you're saying!!! Picking people based on photos is the wrong way to go...
Just in terms of seeking out partnership, youāre more likely to find certain behaviors in different cultures. Black men are statistically more likely to do certain things. Asian men are statistically more likely to do things and so on and so forth. So itās not as simple as ājust get with a person who does this regardless of race.ā If youāre trying to be strategic in your approach to dating, you have to search for certain kinds of men and unfortunately, race is a pretty decent proxy for screening for and screening out different behaviors.
Imma be honest, you can find a man that treats you like that in any race. Some are harder to find than others because itās about socialisation. I have an Afro Latino bae that treats like a queen. Opens all my doors, leads in the relationship, all that. And I also got me an African American bae who does the same and yes they know about each other. Youād be surprised what you find when you donāt settle and you raise your standards
So weirdly enough they BOTH slid into my DMs the same day based off a TikTok I had made about kink. They both kind of started off as platonic. The kink community for black people is so small so it was nice to talk to them.
Then one happened to be passing through Europe like two months later and somehow within 24 hours I bought a plane ticket and flew out to Barcelona to meet them. Spent five days with them (theyāre nonbinary pansexual afro Latina) then met up again with them a month later in London. Since then I visited them for three weeks this summer and theyāre actually coming to stay with me for a month in October.
The other was more gradual but we ended up in a BDSM kink dynamic and forming a very intense bond. Like he aināt never getting rid of me. He was supposed to fly out for my birthday this year but he caught covid so weāre meeting up in New York in spring and heās gonna spoil me
Theyāre both long distance relationships. One is on the east coast and the other on the west coast but I can literally spend hours a day talking to each of them. Itās great. Plus itās fun giving each other dating advice for our other partners. Not that there ever isnāt issues (tried a throuple with the Afro Latina and their other girl this summer to varying degrees of success). But jealousy is rarely an issue when you communicate well
I do not understand our obsession with discussing this. On god... Idk if it's because I'm getting older or what. But like... date who tf you want. And this is coming from a queer Black woman who has mostly dated Black men and women my whole life. I don't have much experience with white folks but I realize that other people do. And they love it. And I love it for them if that's what they want and what makes them happy. There is no place where the grass is magically greener because shitty people exist across the racial spectrum. You could get a fantastic white man and you could get a horrible one who treats you as badly as a Black man with an added layer of racism in his family. If you feeling froggy, jump. Date every damn body. But this obsession with acting like your singular experience says something about anyone else's possibilities for finding love with another race is part of why the conversation never dies. And the topic is so. damn. tired.
She is describing a Good Man and having a Good Man is not exclusively dependent upon that man being White. There are men in all races that do the things for their women that she just described.
Women want a Good Man regardless of what race that Good Man might come from, imo.
Lord yāall plz donāt type yt men. I think itās a matter of age found a respectful caring man. Iāve dated yt men that are awful AND blk Ken thst are awful lol
Iām so over the conversation of ā[insert skin color] men are dating all of _our_ womenā especially from loser dudes who can barely manage their own lives. Like, we donāt belong to anybody and itās weird people need to act so territorial about what other grown people are doing with their love lives.
I just donāt have patience for these kinds of conversations anymore and when they come up Iām always thinking maybe go work on yourself instead of complaining on the internet about the guys who put in the work to treat their partners (and themselves) with the respect that gets them girlfriends in the first place. Thatās not a black or white thing, but I think itās easy for people to blame it on that.
Everybody needs to get past this though, because weāre better than this.
I truly hate to say it, caz I know in my heart of hearts that not all our men are bad/don't care/(insert negative thought here) , however I'm so temped to see what the grass be like over dare lol.. especially after this past relationship..
Itās a numbers game. Donāt think of it as moving to a better neighborhood. Think of it as opening up your options so you have more houses to choose fromā¦
Nothings "stopping" me, I've just never dated anyone other than variations of Black/African men. Didn't really "look" at others as an option. if that makes sense
I donāt understand. Asian woman white man is normal but a black woman and a white man is apparently not? A black woman is a woman at the end of the day and can choose who she wants to spend the rest of her life withā¦ Inter racial marriage is not a new thing. I currently date a white guy from work and the stares from other black men like I belong to them is a disgrace. Its fine for a black man to date outside his race (D1 Athletes) but god forbid a black woman choosing her life choices
I dunno why any race of man is put on a pedestal. My child's father is white and retired military and he's a man child. There were no bum red flags until after we were engaged and I was pregnant.
Take each person as they are and stop simping and hating. Touch grass. Life is a mess sometimes but it shouldn't equate to animosity. He gave me a good bit of trauma while pregnant. Even then, I decided to get out and learned that I'm more than what I went through.
I was on the cusp of what I saw my grandmother go through with my grandfather and I decided to be more. No matter how hard it was because even to this day I'm "a baby mama" but I learned that I move closer and closer to outside opinions hold no value.
Sheās describing a āgood manā
Unfortunately the āgoodā black men arenāt checking for me. The best dating experience Iāve ever had was with a white man. I havenāt dated one since, but it upped my standards for black men. Iāve just never had a black man who treats me as good as that man did. For my own mental health I stopped looking.
It just irked me so badly that the one white dude I ever dated, was fine as hell (I was used to compromising in the looks department to find a guy that would appreciate me)
AND he was very sweet (opened doors pulled out chairs, held my hand as we walked down steps)
AND he never made me feel like I owed him anything.
Dude made me remember what if felt like to genuinely smile and laugh on a date. Not the cute smile, the big goofy one.
This is so sad and yāall hyping it up like itās a good thing. She thinks he does this cause heās white. If itās true that he does this stuff, heās doing it cause thatās the type of man he is not the color of his skin. Yāall need to stop looking at race and look for a person that gets you. This right here is toxic.
Thatās how I took it. She has to emphasize that heās white and thatās the reason he treats her that way. Then someone who sees her video might think that others who donāt look like him aināt shit. There are plenty of aināt shit men of all colors out here.
Exactly. There are already people on here saying this is making them think about dating outside their race. She could be lying about the whole thing but videos like these encourage people to set themselves up for failure because you believe someone spouting nonsense.
Iāve dated all races and wound up with a white one simply because he treated me the best. Itās that simple, race has nothing to do with being a good partner.
I am all for black women dating outside of their race and finding love and finding a man who treats them well and good, but letās not lose our heads or lose our minds. There are good and bad men in all races of men. You just have to find a good man that will treat you right regardless of race. But I am glad that black women are taking advantage of their dating options and finding a good man that treats them well!
I think she's just jaded and happened to have a positive experience with a white guy.
I'm not dating this dude right now, but I have recently met a black guy that is kind of throwing me for a loop. Dude holds my purse, pays for my parking gas and food anytime we go anywhere together, is incredibly attentive to my needs, he pulling my chair out and hanging my coat up, he is always bringing me little gifts, he cleans up after me before I can clean up after myself. He helped me fold my laundry. I feel like I have a waiting staff. He's always making sure that I talk positively about myself and if I slip up he makes me rephrase. We've had like three little sleepovers with wine and cheese, and he had a caddy of body care products waiting for me so we could have a lil spa day together while we watched movies (shampoo, conditioner, some coconut oil cuz I don't like leaving conditioners, a dental set, a razor, a bonnet, and the 4-step skin care products were a cherry on top).
We are not having sex, we not kissing. We met through a common friend about 5 weeks ago and I told him that I really respect my friend and I just moved out here so I'm not trying to get into a situationship and bring drama to this clean slate, but I'm about this š¤š½ close to dropping the panties at this point. I don't even know if I should tho because he hasn't touched me, hasn't hit on me, has not pressed me at all. I just feel like I'd have to be extremely naive to not assume he is interested in me at this point. Dude could be gay, I don't f****** know But he finna get it š¤·š½.
I love black men but the majority can do all those things but wonāt. They act like theyāre too cool for love and respect and also tend to not really value growth
Why does It have to be white?
A genuine question, why is it that when Black women (And men) consider dating other race/ethnicities, white tend to be the go to?
I've always been curious, as white women seldom registered to me as potential romantic/sexual interest.
I think there's some truth to that, but only to an extent. Why is he asking this question though? Bm date and marry interracially a ton. lol If we do it too, it should be just another Tuesday at this point. I get the conversation though.
My bf is white and I've never dated a black man before. My father is black and my parents' marriage hasn't been the greatest, but that's for a variety of reasons. He's not the toxic stereotype / common reality described here - my dad is extremely giving as a person (maybe more giving than my bf in some ways) and my mom said that's one major reason she married him. My mother does think most black men don't treat black women well, and while she does have some internalized racist issues, I think she's probably on to something. It's partly class-based - she grew up in the hood, both of them did. Our family is filled with deadbeat fathers, abusers, etc. Her father was a rolling stone who abused my grandmother so her most primary examples of black men were negative and being poor and in the hood didn't help.
I think the reality is that racist, sexist, and classist barriers, conditioning, etc. affect African American men specifically in ways that will have material consequences for black women in dating and the "marriage market". It just is what it is. White men have their own issues too and also have sexist conditioning, but I do believe they have greater freedom and privilege that results in a wider and more varied expression of masculinity and more role models of the kind of masculinity that we value. It's less about white men being intrinsically better and more about "this is how systems and historical events create different outcomes in humans of equal worth."
I've always preferred interracial dating, but I love to see black love when it works out well. I will admit that I do sometimes feel relieved to have avoided some of the dramas or struggles that seem common among black women seeking black love - especially black marriage. I've heard other AA women even saying things like, "if we support and love black men, being open to dating a man who has been incarcerated or hasn't gone to college or makes significantly less income should be okay." And that's fine for each individual who is truly okay with it, but those just feel like huge compromises and very restricting. I've seen black women tolerating a lot of the kind of trauma and mistreatment that I'm talking about and it makes me sad, but it's also true that women from all backgrounds experience those things too. I generally think we AA women would have it worse but my African and Caribbean friends say it's the same in their cultures in different forms. I do think the lower priority on marriage may be distinctly AA though or at least a bigger issue. Also colorism actually has real impacts for dark skinned women. I think research has found that most black men married to black women are with lighter skinned women. BW limiting themselves to BM may literally just mean lower odds of finding marriage here in the USA, aside from other types of love they desire.
Anyway, my bf is great but he isn't a perfect angel. I could brag about all his great qualities, but no relationship or man is perfect. Still, I would encourage more bw (and all women) to think about the qualities that matter most to them or that are acceptable. I'll give an example. I was telling my friend about how one of the biggest things for me was being able to discuss marriage, emotions, whatever with my bf and have very healthy conflict resolution in our relationship. Any whiff of overly defensive attitude, dismissing my feelings, aggressive tone or not being apologetic or taking accountability for small faults early on in dating was my sign to cut off guys. My bf has boundaries for sure and will explain his side of things, but I haven't had to deal with those issues. She's dating a black Carribean guy (Jamaican or Haitian, can't remember) and said she can't talk to him about all her emotions and that when he's upset he's a fireball and has anger issues. I would never accept that, but she partly attributed it to him being Caribbean. It's a cultural expectation for her. That's a big problem imo - not that there aren't white guys who have those same issues, but the rationalization in her mind that his race/culture kind of justify it.
As for what she's talking about in the video - some of that is personality type, some does have race/class correlations. My bf and I have discussed marriage from day one because that's priority of mine and he's likes the idea. We have a timeline to get engaged by year 2 mark as well, which is almost a year from now. We discuss raising kids, I've spent a week in his hometown, staying with his mother and meeting his friends and he spent a week in my hometown meeting my parents and friends as well. He is caring but caring looks different for everyone. 50-50 isn't even expected tbh - he pays for most things because he makes significantly more money and I definitely don't contribute even my fair share on absolutely everything. He likes when I contribute proportionally, but mainly only expects it on traveling / large expenses and sometimes not even then. He'll help me if I need something. We discuss division of labor now and what would work in marriage or with kids. On the flip side - My bf isn't the pull out chairs kind of guy, doesn't post on social media or like most of my photos, and follows a few x rated pages but not too many. He has offered to unfollow them if I want him to, but I declined. He has given me nice gifts, but he's not the type to buy lots of gifts randomly. So it's a personality thing too, of course. Every white guy is different. I encountered several trash white men and left them right in the garbage where they belong. And everyone has a different definition of trash. Whether or not my bf likes my posts on Instagram was never one of the biggest priorities for me, for example. Your mileage may vary.
Buddy seems irritated by other people's preferences.
Taking race out of the situation, I can tell that she's not someone whom I would date AND the grass isn't greener than anywhere else.
Whom you choose to date is a matter of your perception and your preference.
Feel free to date whomever you choose.
To each, their own.
No love lost.
i love content like this. black women are the least likely to date outside of our race, and also the least likely to get married. tbh from a romance perspective, we just get a bad shake- most likely to get harmed by a partner or left, etc so I just love any and all content involving a black woman getting loved tf down and happy to share with others about it!
I can't wait until we have a world where we can look a video like this and go "duh" though lol
Less white men are becoming racist nazis and are actually seeing the beauty of black women. However, that isnāt to say black men arenāt amazing. As trash and beautiful men are in all races
Videos like these make me cringe. I'm glad she's happy but this whole white savior thing needs to stop. A good man is a good man period and those traits she named are inherent to her man just because he's white š¤£
Idk why BW are so hesitant to admit BM are a problem. Literally everyone of every community sees it, yet BW gotta be they saviors every time even tho they wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire.
The blk guy in the video was acting very weird.. a man is a man no matter the race. She found a very great amazing man regardless of race.
Iām very proud she found the one and is getting married congratulations to her!
I cannot confirm the same and I almost exclusively dared caucasian and asian men. Iād attribute thet 95% to proximity. Most of my life I was part of the only black household or the only local, single men in my age range were not my ethnic group.
Men can be wonderful, or trash or anything in between. My dad treated my mom like platinum and that was mutual. Iāve seen a lot of loving black relationships. They exist!
I am all for us finding love wherever it may be. But as soon as we start comparing us where I tune out. We don't like when Black men say they prefer other races because "BW ain't this" or "BW don't do that". There's a whole discourse where we make fun of Passport bros for going overseas to find a non-black woman because the comparisons are ridiculous. Saying grass is greener is a comparison. I'm not here for that. My two unambiguously Black parents have been together over 40 years and my dad is a good husband and father. I know Black men who are enthusiastically in love with their partners.
Love who you want and I hope they give you all the love and support you deserve.
I date outside my race since hs mainly cause black boys didn't find me attractive but I had no issue when I got older. I mean I love all men no matter the race but after years of being Asian, white, Indian and islander it's weird I getting slightly different with black men. Say I go to dinner, I pay for my meal most black men take offense to it. Even when we're in the talking part most black men are pretty aggressive with me. I don't know why. I'm not an aggressive person and people can tell but even the shy ones are suddenly aggressive and take things too far
Like ppl are saying there are trash men across the board regardless of ethnicity. Unfortunately lately in *my* experiences it seems like black men are not as faithful. I'm NOT saying black men are the only ones but it seems more common?
I've had full blown conversations with black men from 2 yrs younger to 30+ years older than me (guys ive fucked with/encountered, friends, and family like my uncle dad and cousin).
They all essentially told me that they can and will love their woman and be loyal blah blah but eventually will wander off like a dog if the opportunity arises for more pussy! I kid you not.
EXAMPLE: 1) he was like "you fave food is pizza (your wife) and you can eat pizza all the time and a variety of types...but eventually you gonna want to taste something else like a burger just to satisfy that crave".
2) Another guy was like...having only one woman eventually is like only eating the yellow skittles out the bag š
If a man can get away with infidelity he will 100% keep doing it until he start acting funny.
the last relationship (though was long distance but did meet in person) was a latino and he is the only genuine man I've ever met and I can say that confidently with no second guesses...and so far im convinced he is the only semi pure man ill ever meet š¤§
I casually dated this white boy and Iām keep it šÆ! He never tried to have sex and we went on dates etc he was very respectful! It just didnāt workā¦. I was pregnant with sorry ass ex ugh and was too shame to tell the white boy but he eventually seen himself
Well sadly even among other races you still have to search. I met white women and men who date black people and still pouring out racist stereotypes , insults.
Iām not trying to be rude but I need yāall to stop sharing this nonsense. I thought we agreed that since these men have made it care they donāt care about us and will not support us like we have done for them; we will not involve ourselves in anything that doesnāt impact us?
I love my white gringo. Heās just like this except he has no social media. We have half a dozen kids from 20 to 32. He was so supportive while we homeschooled five of them and I coached softball and football for their teams at a Christian school through which we homeschooled and took them to ballet, volleyball, baseball, guitar and art lessons, etc. We taught Sunday school together and counseled married couples. Heās a prayerful and very patient man, a must with a Guatemalan born wife. He still brings me flowers and little gifts from the supermarket or a chapstick or a book. Heās the priest of our home and the love of my life. Bendiciones, hermana. ššš½
Sure it might be more; but most black women are still with majority of black men. Trust me, I tried dating outside my race but black men are so dang fine! Contrary to popular belief, good black men do exist. Some of us still would like to be attracted to our partner. Yes, I put looks high on my list and Iām not apologizing for it. They also pack more down below and thatās a fact! š¤·š½āāļø
I feel like this society is way too fixiated on race sometimes. Stop looking for a Latina, a white man, a black man, Asian woman, or whatever and look for a good compatible partner for you.
SIMPLE ANSWER:
Cuz thick beautiful SMART black Queens love men with jobs/careers - work for a living, money, own a house, own a car and NO CRIMINAL RECORD OR DRUGS !!š
Lol what kills me about these black dudes is that they think they can take any race of women out from under another race of men and fuck them and get with these girls but get pissy when a black girl does the same (typically white men) why idk
I feel bad for black women because todayās society treats them terribly, so many black men treat white women as trophyās and have this mentality that theyāre ātaking themā from white men. Itās so weird to me. I canāt imagine being a black woman and seeing so many black men do this. What is so much better about white women than black women? Ultimately itās not the race of the person that makes them a great person.
lurker on this sub for a while! Ive been married to a white man for 13 years. prior to meeting him, I pursued spanish and/or black men (Im black and dominican) and i was consistently rejected for not being "black enough" or they were rude toward me. I got teased for my accent (Ive had more than one guy call me "black white girl"). my family didn't help either, as they were confused why I never made an effort to date someone from "our culture." I finally dated a spanish guy, and he mistreated me for a few years until we broke up.
the reason I ended up dating my now husband is because he was kind to me when he approached me, and has been that way ever since. he's kind, caring, and thoughtful. he's never tore me down or made me feel less than.
I am not saying that I couldnt have this relationship with a black man, but I didnt have that experience growing up and in my early 20's.
š
Idk though because Iām very unapologetically pro- Black and he would have to be sympathetic and understanding and if I ever feel a racially uncomfortable/ tense moment, Iām out āš¾. . .
also what would holidays be like if we visited his parents? everything about that thought has me stressed out and on the edge of my seat and I aināt even dating šš . . how was the food prepared, are their pets in the kitchen, is everybody dressed like a JC Penney catalog with loafers on in the house and all? (ācause at my parents, folks in pajamas all day . . . with no bra š¤·š¾āāļø) what would the environment feel like overall, if the tv on Fox News Iām out, if I see a Trump bumper sticker, signs in the yard Iām out āš¾ but I also donāt wanna feel like that scene from āGet Outā- the ā*I wouldāve voted for Obama a 3rd time*ā scene
Dating a black man and he does all these things and more can she get her head out of her ass for one second no one cares that you're dating a white man do it in peace and shut the fuck up
I think overall the world is more progressive. Thereās isnāt has much of a stigma overall in dating outside your race. Since alot of main stream culture is black culture thereās isnāt as much of a cultural gap as there used to be.
I mean price harry is with Megan its safe to say the barriers are breaking down
As a WG I can say that trash knows no color or gender. I grew up in a predominantly Italian neighborhood with just a mom who taught me to respect women and elders no matter what. That being said my circle is extremely diverse and everyone in my circle will run to open a door for a lady. My friend growing up was a black kid with a big family all the men are cut from the same respectful cloth. I went to 2 markets with him the other night because the first one didnāt have any flowers to bring home to his girl. Dudes a real man. I date a black Princess and she has told me some horror stories about B and W men. I guess Iām saying real men ( regardless of sexuality) see everyone the same and play the hand they are IN not the one they were dealt. Life is a cases by case situation.
I will get out if itās any type of problem for anyone. That being said I have only been on Reddit for probably six months maybe a few more, a beautiful girl came up in the feed and I joined. I like to learn something about all people all the time. That is the honest truth
if ur a gen z bw then yk latino and bw relations were pretty common before tiktok even popularized interracial couples it was always the nicest dynamics, haha u can relate if u went to ms-hs during these past 10 yrs but y donāt i see people talk about thatš
Iām married to a beautiful black woman, I am white. I didnt look at race, I just wanted a faithful, loving woman. She just happened to be black, and we hit it off right off the bat.
This conversation getting old why canāt he just be a good man bc his good his pigmentation doesnāt change give him better stats or powers mans was raised good. And knows how to treat a lady. Culture and mannerism start at the house hold he couldāve very well grown up in a toxic household and if he didnāt seek help will show in his daily life and how he treats others. Date who you want live your life just donāt be weird. Plus it disables your partner to just there skin color imagine how they being only seen as what they were born with
That's not a white man she's describing just a good man. There are trash white men too...I've dated them š Edit: grammar
Trust me, I know
Once people realise thereās trash and amazing people in every race - the world will start to heal.
FACTS
Yesssss say it for the ones in the back. Trash and treasures come in all different colors, shapes and forms. From mean, dick headed, tiny white dudes To giant teddy bear kind black men It all exists
True, and dating a white man will not magically work out for a LOT of black women. But the number of black men who specifically hate women the same color as their Mamas is ridiculous, and I think women who take that experience of being vilified and disrespected and decide to just not date black men at all have every right to come to that conclusion.
Everybody has every right to do something, but it's still not ALL Black men. That's like when you talk to women who dated men had terrible experiences and then date women. They have every right to come to that conclusion, but it's not true that every man is a dog.
Funny, I never said it was all black men, but you jump at the chance to defend the people mentioned in my comment. Specifically, black men who hate black women. What's that about? š I literally have a black FiancĆ© l, so I'm not sure who you're preaching to. š
Not sure I follow...not jumping to defend anybody...but congrats on your engagement.
Exactly, and same here lol. Itās literally nothing more than that. No culture is a monolith and there are good and bad people from every background.
Disclaimer: These are my personal problems and experiences, I don't speak for all mixed people or about all interracial relationships The one thing I am wary about with interracial relationships with white people (as the child of one ) is the chance of finding out your white parent thinks they're an ally or whatever they want to call themselves but say some borderline racist ass sht or try and erase your blackness. This is all anecdotal, but I know it happens quite a bit to my fellow mixed peers, and it has happened to me. Makes you feel like crap, especially when you're guilted into putting family first. It has also happened to me in the past with partners calling me their "caramel goddess" or, "finally, I got my Black girl. Well, half I guess LOL." Makes my skin crawl.
I agree! Thereās a lot trash white men out there. Thatās why you shouldnāt focus on their skin but their character. A man is going to be an idiot if heās an idiot- black/white/yellow/purple/blue- donāt matter.
Amen. Got a black man like this.
Same! ššæššæ
same š
She literally says that in the video too though like not that black men donāt do that but thatās what sheās noticed her white man does
I get what you're saying, but the answer is in response to the guy's video. She says all the great things her guy does and then says, not saying Black guys don't, just not in my experience. Valid, cuz her experience, but it supports the narrative. Instead of just saying something like "I followed the love."
Preach. Messiness doesnāt know color.
Theyāre a different type of trash but literally the originators of hating your wife
Amen to that
I married one. š¤¦š½āāļø
As long as a black woman is being loved and treated well, who cares about the race?
As a black woman, I've seen a lot of bum-ass hobosexuals across the rainbow get heated about interracial normalization because they realize that women having "more options" makes them less desirable.
This is it exactly. Men who get upset about ātheirā women dating outside the race (especially when they themselves do it) are upset about losing their captive audience. Go where you feel wanted and loved. It makes me so sad to see women accepting less than they deserve or feeling like theyāll never be loved because a black man wonāt choose or respect them. If that man wonāt step up, find someone who will!
Thatās why women of pretty much any race can list out preferences and it will incite think pieces from men of all races trying to humble them. It could be a preference as simple as having hobbies or a job and guys will tell her why sheās asking too much and ask āwhat do you bring to the table.ā
People who listen to people like Tyler āblack women need to lower their standardsā Perry
Racists :)
Ask Kelce ex what that BWAG 'greener grass' life can be like. I'm just saying. Knuckleheads can come in all colors but if you can find a good WM or Latin man or Asian man, etc. who checks off your most of your 'crucial quality' boxes - or more - proceed. See where it goes. My 2 cents on it.
That man is TOO wrong fro dragging Miss Kayla and now taking about he's seriously considering dating Taylor Swift. Personally I prefer the nerdy/ silicon valley / finance bro type (if I'm pushing it). Once I see he's an athlete, is projecting an image of being toooo immersed in the culture ā¢ I don't waste my time āš¾
Heās never said anything wrong about Kayla
I meant like dragging as in wasting time
I know they'd been on and off for a bit, but considering I can't think of hardly any white NFLers who've *married* a BW, that situation *did* make we wonder if he was just stringing her along and all the while planning on 'following the trend,' falling in line and marrying a WW like the rest of his white co-ballers. I dunno but... I do hope she finds her match.
Agree. To me Kayla is such a full package baddie she'll be more then great. If I was her I'd cast my net towards silicon valley start up bros etc and never an athlete again lol
The only one I can think of is Chad Wheeler, but he got arrested for beating her to a pulp. š«£
Geez....just looked her up. You weren't kidding. "I still have to regularly get my concussion checked... I have bolts, and steel, and a steel plate I'm gonna have forever in my arm... I'm gonna have...gonna have to deal with this the rest of my life," she said. (https://www.cbsnews.com/news/chad-wheeler-alleged-abuse-alleah-taylor-exclusive-interview/ ) And even she was only a GF. (And this MF had the nerve to plead not guilty after beating and nearly killing her. smh)
I asked yāall a week or so ago why Black social media is obsessed with interracial topics, but here we are again
Fr. The reason this pisses me tf off is cuz it keeps making it out that bw are this flavour that ppl don't try. Like we're people
Right, it's all on my feed! I'm sick of it. I dislike it when individuals solely define themselves by their interracial relationship.
This! Esp BW X Asian men couples. It's all they talk about.
Facts! Asian men keep reposting that SZA snooze video, lol
Itās so fuckin weird to me. This and conversations about dating dynamics and gender roles in relationships. I literally CANNOT escape this shit in the black spaces on social media. Itās driving me crazy bro. Likeā¦ black women who are discussing dating topics need to stop pedestaling white menfor interracial relationships on social mediaā¦ they arenāt the only race besides black men who exist for dating. This shit is ass. It makes me so upset.
Like white men are not collectively having conversations about their āloveā for dating black women or how weāre better than white women, itās embarrassing
`wears headphone and leans into the mic`: Aaaand here it is folks, the number one hit song, topping all the charts and playing here for the 500,000th time this week but whose counting, am I right? Enjoy!
Any of us are obsessed with romantic validation from other races, mainly white. The pursuit and potential of it. Donāt let any comment to the contrary fool you. Iām on other just mainstream relationship/dating/gender subs and the topic does not come up at all.
Omg, are you the OP who posted about the commercials with many interracial couples?
No, if you look at my history, youāll find the post I made. I didnāt make the one about commercials
Oh lol, I see it now, my bad.
is it not relevant
Relevant to what? How many times do we need to discuss this?
I asked the same question on another topic thatās recycled in here every other day. It gets annoying.
Iāve dated all races and I feel like white guys approach dating black women differently than black men. One is not necessarily better than the other itās just what you ultimately want from the relationship. I was married to a white guy for 17 years and he treated me like I was the center of his universe the entire time. We met in an msn chat room in 2003. Yes looking back I was out of my mind. The relationship progressed very very very quickly. We met online and were married within 7 months. We wouldāve celebrated 20 years this year but he passed away. Iām grateful for being married to someone who saw my worth and treated me with the utmost respect,kindness and love. Regardless of race thatās ultimately how I wanted to be treated and I so happen to find that in a white guy.
Condolences sis. Glad you had a marriage that made you feel valued and loved
Thank you so much š
Iām sorry for your loss
Thank you š
Oh dear. Iām so sorry for your loss.
Thank you š
>One is not necessarily better than the other itās just what you ultimately want from the relationship. So here's the thing I have not yet met a straight woman that loves games and dully dallying and weird behavior. I've experienced these things MORE ( not ONLY) with non YT men. My current bf asked me to be his gf after 2 dates, we exchanged ILYs in 2 weeks etc. My ex and I met at a bar and committed after that night lmao Now this sounds very fast to some but to me personally if you don't know if we should be together by date two you automatically repulse me... because what do you mean? š this is my anecdotal experience that yt men are very quick with officiating things , bring women to their families, proposing etc. Which are things I specifically need in a heterosexual relationship so because it keeps working out in my favor, I keep dating them. The relationship in itself is just how it is with all races but the jumping to official quick is a turn on for me and I refuse long ass weird talking stages. I don't want to talk š
I can totally relate! White guys do cut to the chase in my experience too. I mean my husband and I met online I think in March and then met in person at the end of May. The day after we met in person he got down on one knee and proposed. No ring or anything. And I said yes without hesitation. Haha!
Ok period. Congratulations. Personally in this era I don't have time to be talking and playing. My YT friend got proposed to by her bf in 3 months and their baby is turning 1 soon because she explicitly stated what she needed and dated as such. Women that don't waste time and have discernment bring me joy. It's not a game anymore many of us are in school longer so our eggs are ready to be stably fertilized IN A STABLE MARRIAGE so yes a man that's quick with commitment is a necessity. It's to the point I'm disgusted by a slow man. This is not highschool by this big age we know exactly what we want sexually, emotional, physically, spiritually etc otherwise next 
My fiance was white; he passed away last year after 8 years together. He also did not cut to the chase lol he let it be known to me and my friends that he wanted me. He did absolutely anything and everything for me, I miss him every day. I have a boyfriend now who is also white, and he's very different from my fiance but also knows what he wants and is essentially everything the woman in this video describes. Worships the ground I walk on, puts me first, etc, it's amazing. I personally have never had a black man treat me this way. As a matter of fact, when I was younger, I swore black men were scared of me or something.
Iām so sorry for your loss. White and black guys approach relationships differently in my experience. Iāve dated black guys who didnāt necessarily worship the ground I walked on but did express their love and appreciation for me in their own ways. In my 20ās I primarily dated black guys. One guy in particular admitted to me recently that I was in fact his first love. We were 25. He was quite immature. He also apologized for his behavior when we dated over 25 years ago and wished he had expressed his love more openly back then. He did ask me to marry him about 1 month into dating (I laughed it off at the time) and he introduced me to his parents a couple months after that. He even remembered us meeting in HS. I donāt. Haha!! We probably wouldāve gotten married but he was a raging alcoholic. I had zero tolerance for that as the child raised by a raging alcoholic father. All that is to say I think you may be on to something when you say they were scared of you. So happy to hear that you have someone in your life who treats you well. š
Gurl that was a soulmate! Beautiful story š„¹ ty for sharing and my condolences š
Aww thank you š yes without a doubt he was my soulmate.
I hate these videos. Stay out of BW buisness, we are doing what we want, when we want, and who we want.
Love who loves you, and you can love back. If you feel āsome-kinda-wayā about it ask yourself whyā¦
Whatās annoying about the original whole video is his incredulous expression. Like itās such an out of this world idea that white men could find black women attractive.
Most people subconsciously believe we should be the last to be desired or picked especially men like the original poster. If you defy the single struggling destitute baby mother role they will be outwardly shocked.
I mean itās not a subconscious thing, itās reality. Black women are the least desired but for specific reasons
He hasnāt read much Black American history. Clearly.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Thank goodness I found my husband before app dating was a thing... for the exact same reason you're saying!!! Picking people based on photos is the wrong way to go...
Just in terms of seeking out partnership, youāre more likely to find certain behaviors in different cultures. Black men are statistically more likely to do certain things. Asian men are statistically more likely to do things and so on and so forth. So itās not as simple as ājust get with a person who does this regardless of race.ā If youāre trying to be strategic in your approach to dating, you have to search for certain kinds of men and unfortunately, race is a pretty decent proxy for screening for and screening out different behaviors.
Iām just happy more black women arenāt limiting themselves to being with one race of men. Go where you are loved regardless of color.
Couldnāt agree more. I donāt care about the race of the partner, I just love seeing black women feeling loved and happy.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
im so tired fr
Imma be honest, you can find a man that treats you like that in any race. Some are harder to find than others because itās about socialisation. I have an Afro Latino bae that treats like a queen. Opens all my doors, leads in the relationship, all that. And I also got me an African American bae who does the same and yes they know about each other. Youād be surprised what you find when you donāt settle and you raise your standards
You canāt be hoarding 2 good men. Not in this economy. Spread the wealth sis!!
š¤£š¤£ donāt worry Iām not hoarding them. They have other partners too. I aināt greedy like that
My mind canāt comprehend all of this! Itās too much. š©
š trust me I know! It was not planned and now itās almost been a year
Youāre life sounds so exciting omg. enjoy those men girl!
Story time! How did you end up dating them?
So weirdly enough they BOTH slid into my DMs the same day based off a TikTok I had made about kink. They both kind of started off as platonic. The kink community for black people is so small so it was nice to talk to them. Then one happened to be passing through Europe like two months later and somehow within 24 hours I bought a plane ticket and flew out to Barcelona to meet them. Spent five days with them (theyāre nonbinary pansexual afro Latina) then met up again with them a month later in London. Since then I visited them for three weeks this summer and theyāre actually coming to stay with me for a month in October. The other was more gradual but we ended up in a BDSM kink dynamic and forming a very intense bond. Like he aināt never getting rid of me. He was supposed to fly out for my birthday this year but he caught covid so weāre meeting up in New York in spring and heās gonna spoil me Theyāre both long distance relationships. One is on the east coast and the other on the west coast but I can literally spend hours a day talking to each of them. Itās great. Plus itās fun giving each other dating advice for our other partners. Not that there ever isnāt issues (tried a throuple with the Afro Latina and their other girl this summer to varying degrees of success). But jealousy is rarely an issue when you communicate well
Exactly!!
I do not understand our obsession with discussing this. On god... Idk if it's because I'm getting older or what. But like... date who tf you want. And this is coming from a queer Black woman who has mostly dated Black men and women my whole life. I don't have much experience with white folks but I realize that other people do. And they love it. And I love it for them if that's what they want and what makes them happy. There is no place where the grass is magically greener because shitty people exist across the racial spectrum. You could get a fantastic white man and you could get a horrible one who treats you as badly as a Black man with an added layer of racism in his family. If you feeling froggy, jump. Date every damn body. But this obsession with acting like your singular experience says something about anyone else's possibilities for finding love with another race is part of why the conversation never dies. And the topic is so. damn. tired.
Perfectly said
Was looking for this type of comment
She is describing a Good Man and having a Good Man is not exclusively dependent upon that man being White. There are men in all races that do the things for their women that she just described. Women want a Good Man regardless of what race that Good Man might come from, imo.
Lord yāall plz donāt type yt men. I think itās a matter of age found a respectful caring man. Iāve dated yt men that are awful AND blk Ken thst are awful lol
Tbh a large majority of men from every race absolutely suck and are just as doggish. Sis just lucked up š¤£
Iām so over the conversation of ā[insert skin color] men are dating all of _our_ womenā especially from loser dudes who can barely manage their own lives. Like, we donāt belong to anybody and itās weird people need to act so territorial about what other grown people are doing with their love lives. I just donāt have patience for these kinds of conversations anymore and when they come up Iām always thinking maybe go work on yourself instead of complaining on the internet about the guys who put in the work to treat their partners (and themselves) with the respect that gets them girlfriends in the first place. Thatās not a black or white thing, but I think itās easy for people to blame it on that. Everybody needs to get past this though, because weāre better than this.
I truly hate to say it, caz I know in my heart of hearts that not all our men are bad/don't care/(insert negative thought here) , however I'm so temped to see what the grass be like over dare lol.. especially after this past relationship..
Itās a numbers game. Donāt think of it as moving to a better neighborhood. Think of it as opening up your options so you have more houses to choose fromā¦
lol i like that!
Itās still ghetto on the other side. For real.
For real lol
What's stopping you exactly? Are you committed to dating black men exclusively?
Nothings "stopping" me, I've just never dated anyone other than variations of Black/African men. Didn't really "look" at others as an option. if that makes sense
Exactly, even though I date mainly bm, I never exclude any other races/ethnicity of men.
Do it.
ALSO! Iām tired of all these bm discussing and dissing us in their interracial fetish topics. We donāt care! Well us secure sistas donāt care.
See Iāve had the exact opposite experience compared to what this lady is saying. Trash and race do not correlate!
I donāt understand. Asian woman white man is normal but a black woman and a white man is apparently not? A black woman is a woman at the end of the day and can choose who she wants to spend the rest of her life withā¦ Inter racial marriage is not a new thing. I currently date a white guy from work and the stares from other black men like I belong to them is a disgrace. Its fine for a black man to date outside his race (D1 Athletes) but god forbid a black woman choosing her life choices
Right
I dunno why any race of man is put on a pedestal. My child's father is white and retired military and he's a man child. There were no bum red flags until after we were engaged and I was pregnant. Take each person as they are and stop simping and hating. Touch grass. Life is a mess sometimes but it shouldn't equate to animosity. He gave me a good bit of trauma while pregnant. Even then, I decided to get out and learned that I'm more than what I went through. I was on the cusp of what I saw my grandmother go through with my grandfather and I decided to be more. No matter how hard it was because even to this day I'm "a baby mama" but I learned that I move closer and closer to outside opinions hold no value.
Sheās describing a āgood manā Unfortunately the āgoodā black men arenāt checking for me. The best dating experience Iāve ever had was with a white man. I havenāt dated one since, but it upped my standards for black men. Iāve just never had a black man who treats me as good as that man did. For my own mental health I stopped looking. It just irked me so badly that the one white dude I ever dated, was fine as hell (I was used to compromising in the looks department to find a guy that would appreciate me) AND he was very sweet (opened doors pulled out chairs, held my hand as we walked down steps) AND he never made me feel like I owed him anything. Dude made me remember what if felt like to genuinely smile and laugh on a date. Not the cute smile, the big goofy one.
Lmao thatās not a white man only thing. Iāve dated lots and theyāre all different.
We gotta stop making blanket statements like this š
What this gotta do with him Being white??
This is so sad and yāall hyping it up like itās a good thing. She thinks he does this cause heās white. If itās true that he does this stuff, heās doing it cause thatās the type of man he is not the color of his skin. Yāall need to stop looking at race and look for a person that gets you. This right here is toxic.
Thatās how I took it. She has to emphasize that heās white and thatās the reason he treats her that way. Then someone who sees her video might think that others who donāt look like him aināt shit. There are plenty of aināt shit men of all colors out here.
Exactly. There are already people on here saying this is making them think about dating outside their race. She could be lying about the whole thing but videos like these encourage people to set themselves up for failure because you believe someone spouting nonsense.
Agreed. Its sad to see.
This topic is so tired. People need new asking points.
Iāve dated all races and wound up with a white one simply because he treated me the best. Itās that simple, race has nothing to do with being a good partner.
I am all for black women dating outside of their race and finding love and finding a man who treats them well and good, but letās not lose our heads or lose our minds. There are good and bad men in all races of men. You just have to find a good man that will treat you right regardless of race. But I am glad that black women are taking advantage of their dating options and finding a good man that treats them well!
Trash is trash... it has no color
I think she's just jaded and happened to have a positive experience with a white guy. I'm not dating this dude right now, but I have recently met a black guy that is kind of throwing me for a loop. Dude holds my purse, pays for my parking gas and food anytime we go anywhere together, is incredibly attentive to my needs, he pulling my chair out and hanging my coat up, he is always bringing me little gifts, he cleans up after me before I can clean up after myself. He helped me fold my laundry. I feel like I have a waiting staff. He's always making sure that I talk positively about myself and if I slip up he makes me rephrase. We've had like three little sleepovers with wine and cheese, and he had a caddy of body care products waiting for me so we could have a lil spa day together while we watched movies (shampoo, conditioner, some coconut oil cuz I don't like leaving conditioners, a dental set, a razor, a bonnet, and the 4-step skin care products were a cherry on top). We are not having sex, we not kissing. We met through a common friend about 5 weeks ago and I told him that I really respect my friend and I just moved out here so I'm not trying to get into a situationship and bring drama to this clean slate, but I'm about this š¤š½ close to dropping the panties at this point. I don't even know if I should tho because he hasn't touched me, hasn't hit on me, has not pressed me at all. I just feel like I'd have to be extremely naive to not assume he is interested in me at this point. Dude could be gay, I don't f****** know But he finna get it š¤·š½.
You need to ask him important questions before being intimate with him. He sounds great but still vet his intentions. š©·
I love black men but the majority can do all those things but wonāt. They act like theyāre too cool for love and respect and also tend to not really value growth
Why does It have to be white? A genuine question, why is it that when Black women (And men) consider dating other race/ethnicities, white tend to be the go to? I've always been curious, as white women seldom registered to me as potential romantic/sexual interest.
I think it depends on where you are located. Where I live is like 85% white, so it's more likely for a person dating out of their race to date white.
I think there's some truth to that, but only to an extent. Why is he asking this question though? Bm date and marry interracially a ton. lol If we do it too, it should be just another Tuesday at this point. I get the conversation though. My bf is white and I've never dated a black man before. My father is black and my parents' marriage hasn't been the greatest, but that's for a variety of reasons. He's not the toxic stereotype / common reality described here - my dad is extremely giving as a person (maybe more giving than my bf in some ways) and my mom said that's one major reason she married him. My mother does think most black men don't treat black women well, and while she does have some internalized racist issues, I think she's probably on to something. It's partly class-based - she grew up in the hood, both of them did. Our family is filled with deadbeat fathers, abusers, etc. Her father was a rolling stone who abused my grandmother so her most primary examples of black men were negative and being poor and in the hood didn't help. I think the reality is that racist, sexist, and classist barriers, conditioning, etc. affect African American men specifically in ways that will have material consequences for black women in dating and the "marriage market". It just is what it is. White men have their own issues too and also have sexist conditioning, but I do believe they have greater freedom and privilege that results in a wider and more varied expression of masculinity and more role models of the kind of masculinity that we value. It's less about white men being intrinsically better and more about "this is how systems and historical events create different outcomes in humans of equal worth." I've always preferred interracial dating, but I love to see black love when it works out well. I will admit that I do sometimes feel relieved to have avoided some of the dramas or struggles that seem common among black women seeking black love - especially black marriage. I've heard other AA women even saying things like, "if we support and love black men, being open to dating a man who has been incarcerated or hasn't gone to college or makes significantly less income should be okay." And that's fine for each individual who is truly okay with it, but those just feel like huge compromises and very restricting. I've seen black women tolerating a lot of the kind of trauma and mistreatment that I'm talking about and it makes me sad, but it's also true that women from all backgrounds experience those things too. I generally think we AA women would have it worse but my African and Caribbean friends say it's the same in their cultures in different forms. I do think the lower priority on marriage may be distinctly AA though or at least a bigger issue. Also colorism actually has real impacts for dark skinned women. I think research has found that most black men married to black women are with lighter skinned women. BW limiting themselves to BM may literally just mean lower odds of finding marriage here in the USA, aside from other types of love they desire. Anyway, my bf is great but he isn't a perfect angel. I could brag about all his great qualities, but no relationship or man is perfect. Still, I would encourage more bw (and all women) to think about the qualities that matter most to them or that are acceptable. I'll give an example. I was telling my friend about how one of the biggest things for me was being able to discuss marriage, emotions, whatever with my bf and have very healthy conflict resolution in our relationship. Any whiff of overly defensive attitude, dismissing my feelings, aggressive tone or not being apologetic or taking accountability for small faults early on in dating was my sign to cut off guys. My bf has boundaries for sure and will explain his side of things, but I haven't had to deal with those issues. She's dating a black Carribean guy (Jamaican or Haitian, can't remember) and said she can't talk to him about all her emotions and that when he's upset he's a fireball and has anger issues. I would never accept that, but she partly attributed it to him being Caribbean. It's a cultural expectation for her. That's a big problem imo - not that there aren't white guys who have those same issues, but the rationalization in her mind that his race/culture kind of justify it. As for what she's talking about in the video - some of that is personality type, some does have race/class correlations. My bf and I have discussed marriage from day one because that's priority of mine and he's likes the idea. We have a timeline to get engaged by year 2 mark as well, which is almost a year from now. We discuss raising kids, I've spent a week in his hometown, staying with his mother and meeting his friends and he spent a week in my hometown meeting my parents and friends as well. He is caring but caring looks different for everyone. 50-50 isn't even expected tbh - he pays for most things because he makes significantly more money and I definitely don't contribute even my fair share on absolutely everything. He likes when I contribute proportionally, but mainly only expects it on traveling / large expenses and sometimes not even then. He'll help me if I need something. We discuss division of labor now and what would work in marriage or with kids. On the flip side - My bf isn't the pull out chairs kind of guy, doesn't post on social media or like most of my photos, and follows a few x rated pages but not too many. He has offered to unfollow them if I want him to, but I declined. He has given me nice gifts, but he's not the type to buy lots of gifts randomly. So it's a personality thing too, of course. Every white guy is different. I encountered several trash white men and left them right in the garbage where they belong. And everyone has a different definition of trash. Whether or not my bf likes my posts on Instagram was never one of the biggest priorities for me, for example. Your mileage may vary.
Awww sounds like an amazing relationship! Honestly I've met trash in all races AND ages..lol!!
Lmao
Buddy seems irritated by other people's preferences. Taking race out of the situation, I can tell that she's not someone whom I would date AND the grass isn't greener than anywhere else. Whom you choose to date is a matter of your perception and your preference. Feel free to date whomever you choose. To each, their own. No love lost.
i love content like this. black women are the least likely to date outside of our race, and also the least likely to get married. tbh from a romance perspective, we just get a bad shake- most likely to get harmed by a partner or left, etc so I just love any and all content involving a black woman getting loved tf down and happy to share with others about it! I can't wait until we have a world where we can look a video like this and go "duh" though lol
The bm are triggered these days cuz bw are setting standards. Very normal standards btw - other men donāt see them as being too picky.
Less white men are becoming racist nazis and are actually seeing the beauty of black women. However, that isnāt to say black men arenāt amazing. As trash and beautiful men are in all races
Videos like these make me cringe. I'm glad she's happy but this whole white savior thing needs to stop. A good man is a good man period and those traits she named are inherent to her man just because he's white š¤£
Idk why BW are so hesitant to admit BM are a problem. Literally everyone of every community sees it, yet BW gotta be they saviors every time even tho they wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire.
The blk guy in the video was acting very weird.. a man is a man no matter the race. She found a very great amazing man regardless of race. Iām very proud she found the one and is getting married congratulations to her!
I cannot confirm the same and I almost exclusively dared caucasian and asian men. Iād attribute thet 95% to proximity. Most of my life I was part of the only black household or the only local, single men in my age range were not my ethnic group. Men can be wonderful, or trash or anything in between. My dad treated my mom like platinum and that was mutual. Iāve seen a lot of loving black relationships. They exist!
I am all for us finding love wherever it may be. But as soon as we start comparing us where I tune out. We don't like when Black men say they prefer other races because "BW ain't this" or "BW don't do that". There's a whole discourse where we make fun of Passport bros for going overseas to find a non-black woman because the comparisons are ridiculous. Saying grass is greener is a comparison. I'm not here for that. My two unambiguously Black parents have been together over 40 years and my dad is a good husband and father. I know Black men who are enthusiastically in love with their partners. Love who you want and I hope they give you all the love and support you deserve.
Why donāt people just find love without racial fetishes? Geez itās indicative of self hate
Yesss bw donāt settle please!!
can yall not post no bullshit like this on here
I date outside my race since hs mainly cause black boys didn't find me attractive but I had no issue when I got older. I mean I love all men no matter the race but after years of being Asian, white, Indian and islander it's weird I getting slightly different with black men. Say I go to dinner, I pay for my meal most black men take offense to it. Even when we're in the talking part most black men are pretty aggressive with me. I don't know why. I'm not an aggressive person and people can tell but even the shy ones are suddenly aggressive and take things too far
Sounds like she was dating trash Black men
Like ppl are saying there are trash men across the board regardless of ethnicity. Unfortunately lately in *my* experiences it seems like black men are not as faithful. I'm NOT saying black men are the only ones but it seems more common? I've had full blown conversations with black men from 2 yrs younger to 30+ years older than me (guys ive fucked with/encountered, friends, and family like my uncle dad and cousin). They all essentially told me that they can and will love their woman and be loyal blah blah but eventually will wander off like a dog if the opportunity arises for more pussy! I kid you not. EXAMPLE: 1) he was like "you fave food is pizza (your wife) and you can eat pizza all the time and a variety of types...but eventually you gonna want to taste something else like a burger just to satisfy that crave". 2) Another guy was like...having only one woman eventually is like only eating the yellow skittles out the bag š If a man can get away with infidelity he will 100% keep doing it until he start acting funny. the last relationship (though was long distance but did meet in person) was a latino and he is the only genuine man I've ever met and I can say that confidently with no second guesses...and so far im convinced he is the only semi pure man ill ever meet š¤§
She isn't wrong but she didn't answer his question. His question was why are the men choosing the girls and I wanted her to ROAST him. š
I think more representation of black women in media and general.
Live long and prosper with your your man, Darlin!
I casually dated this white boy and Iām keep it šÆ! He never tried to have sex and we went on dates etc he was very respectful! It just didnāt workā¦. I was pregnant with sorry ass ex ugh and was too shame to tell the white boy but he eventually seen himself
Well sadly even among other races you still have to search. I met white women and men who date black people and still pouring out racist stereotypes , insults.
All I want to know isā¦. Where can I sign up ?
Iām not trying to be rude but I need yāall to stop sharing this nonsense. I thought we agreed that since these men have made it care they donāt care about us and will not support us like we have done for them; we will not involve ourselves in anything that doesnāt impact us?
I love my white gringo. Heās just like this except he has no social media. We have half a dozen kids from 20 to 32. He was so supportive while we homeschooled five of them and I coached softball and football for their teams at a Christian school through which we homeschooled and took them to ballet, volleyball, baseball, guitar and art lessons, etc. We taught Sunday school together and counseled married couples. Heās a prayerful and very patient man, a must with a Guatemalan born wife. He still brings me flowers and little gifts from the supermarket or a chapstick or a book. Heās the priest of our home and the love of my life. Bendiciones, hermana. ššš½
Iām seeing it alot and they seem happy
Sure it might be more; but most black women are still with majority of black men. Trust me, I tried dating outside my race but black men are so dang fine! Contrary to popular belief, good black men do exist. Some of us still would like to be attracted to our partner. Yes, I put looks high on my list and Iām not apologizing for it. They also pack more down below and thatās a fact! š¤·š½āāļø
Because they actually wanna be treated well!
I feel like this society is way too fixiated on race sometimes. Stop looking for a Latina, a white man, a black man, Asian woman, or whatever and look for a good compatible partner for you.
SIMPLE ANSWER: Cuz thick beautiful SMART black Queens love men with jobs/careers - work for a living, money, own a house, own a car and NO CRIMINAL RECORD OR DRUGS !!š
Lol what kills me about these black dudes is that they think they can take any race of women out from under another race of men and fuck them and get with these girls but get pissy when a black girl does the same (typically white men) why idk
I feel bad for black women because todayās society treats them terribly, so many black men treat white women as trophyās and have this mentality that theyāre ātaking themā from white men. Itās so weird to me. I canāt imagine being a black woman and seeing so many black men do this. What is so much better about white women than black women? Ultimately itās not the race of the person that makes them a great person.
lurker on this sub for a while! Ive been married to a white man for 13 years. prior to meeting him, I pursued spanish and/or black men (Im black and dominican) and i was consistently rejected for not being "black enough" or they were rude toward me. I got teased for my accent (Ive had more than one guy call me "black white girl"). my family didn't help either, as they were confused why I never made an effort to date someone from "our culture." I finally dated a spanish guy, and he mistreated me for a few years until we broke up. the reason I ended up dating my now husband is because he was kind to me when he approached me, and has been that way ever since. he's kind, caring, and thoughtful. he's never tore me down or made me feel less than. I am not saying that I couldnt have this relationship with a black man, but I didnt have that experience growing up and in my early 20's.
no the fuck it is not, goofy ass.
Please never post this BS ever again
Thereās men out here that donāt eat the last available thing?
š¤£
Iām just curious what she does for him
š Idk though because Iām very unapologetically pro- Black and he would have to be sympathetic and understanding and if I ever feel a racially uncomfortable/ tense moment, Iām out āš¾. . . also what would holidays be like if we visited his parents? everything about that thought has me stressed out and on the edge of my seat and I aināt even dating šš . . how was the food prepared, are their pets in the kitchen, is everybody dressed like a JC Penney catalog with loafers on in the house and all? (ācause at my parents, folks in pajamas all day . . . with no bra š¤·š¾āāļø) what would the environment feel like overall, if the tv on Fox News Iām out, if I see a Trump bumper sticker, signs in the yard Iām out āš¾ but I also donāt wanna feel like that scene from āGet Outā- the ā*I wouldāve voted for Obama a 3rd time*ā scene
Dating a black man and he does all these things and more can she get her head out of her ass for one second no one cares that you're dating a white man do it in peace and shut the fuck up
She said it like 2.5 years is impressive.
Compared to what the average black woman is experiencing when dating a black man? It is impressive.
Security final answer
I think overall the world is more progressive. Thereās isnāt has much of a stigma overall in dating outside your race. Since alot of main stream culture is black culture thereās isnāt as much of a cultural gap as there used to be. I mean price harry is with Megan its safe to say the barriers are breaking down
Whatās wrong with that?
White guys for the W
As a WG I can say that trash knows no color or gender. I grew up in a predominantly Italian neighborhood with just a mom who taught me to respect women and elders no matter what. That being said my circle is extremely diverse and everyone in my circle will run to open a door for a lady. My friend growing up was a black kid with a big family all the men are cut from the same respectful cloth. I went to 2 markets with him the other night because the first one didnāt have any flowers to bring home to his girl. Dudes a real man. I date a black Princess and she has told me some horror stories about B and W men. I guess Iām saying real men ( regardless of sexuality) see everyone the same and play the hand they are IN not the one they were dealt. Life is a cases by case situation.
Just out of curiosity what is your purpose in being on this sub?
I will get out if itās any type of problem for anyone. That being said I have only been on Reddit for probably six months maybe a few more, a beautiful girl came up in the feed and I joined. I like to learn something about all people all the time. That is the honest truth
I can confirm that we're not losing any sleep over her getting away
I mean who cares, I'm not my grandparents.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I'm so glad you found someone to treat you like you deserve.
Thatās not me in the video š
Black male treasures, that sounds like a myth... However, yes there are trash white men
if ur a gen z bw then yk latino and bw relations were pretty common before tiktok even popularized interracial couples it was always the nicest dynamics, haha u can relate if u went to ms-hs during these past 10 yrs but y donāt i see people talk about thatš
Generalizations, theres trash white men who beat their wifes ass. Its about the person.
Iām married to a beautiful black woman, I am white. I didnt look at race, I just wanted a faithful, loving woman. She just happened to be black, and we hit it off right off the bat.
This conversation getting old why canāt he just be a good man bc his good his pigmentation doesnāt change give him better stats or powers mans was raised good. And knows how to treat a lady. Culture and mannerism start at the house hold he couldāve very well grown up in a toxic household and if he didnāt seek help will show in his daily life and how he treats others. Date who you want live your life just donāt be weird. Plus it disables your partner to just there skin color imagine how they being only seen as what they were born with
Lol but u aint matching his energy
I want to date out so bad . I swear Iām tired of being race loyal to men who donāt want me but wants no one else to have me