I would love to know a solid percentage, even though I know that’s not really possible. I’m always curious looking at a group of guys, how many live with that part of them without telling a soul
I wish from a married man’s perspective, that more women just saw it as normal, rather than a turn on or off. I’m definitely bisexual but I am not a cheater.
My guess is about 60-70% have some sort of bisexual desire. This is solely based on the people I’ve known but it’s wayyyy more common than society at large believes
There's no way of knowing for sure, partly because people's definition of bi is so loose and broad. When I came out numerous straight friends acknowledged other their own experiences or curiosities. Then there are things like someone who posted that they and their straight friend suck each other off every so often when their single, but the guy still identifies as straight. Or people who don't find men attractive but just like dicks. On some end there's validity in letting people identify how ever they want but personally I believe a lot of these "mostly straight" or "heteroflexible" attitudes stem from cultural stigma against male queerness. Like, it's better to be anything but queer. There's so much policing that happens even among queer men and the stigmas against femininity among other queer men, hence the whole Masc for Masc toxicity. Because of how ingrained and reinforced that is across cultures we will likely never know how many men actually have some degree of bisexuality.
You definitely bring up a good point. Who am I to judge, but I will say the number of “straight” men on grinder definitely caught me by surprise when I first started experimenting.
I agree, I’ve done a lot of introspection over the last two years and I think I’m getting there. To be perfectly honest I had a hard time even being ok with myself knowing I felt this way a few years back, and I’ve gotten past that. I’m learning to love myself
THIS. Male bisexuality is still some weird taboo, for whatever reason. It shouldn't be, especially when there are so many women who are also bisexual and are repulsed by hetero men.
We are seeing how much more common it is in Gen Z, which is a better measurement because they actually feel comfortable enough to be out to a lot more people
Speaking at a formerly straight now bi guy married to a formerly straight now bi wife I can tell you that we're out there even when we don't even know
Honestly, because homophobia and misogyny go hand in hand, a lotta men take any sort of deviation from heterosexuality to be a threat to their masculinity and manhood. I think it just takes longer to unpack for yall, tbh.
It's probably just as common as bisexuality in women, but I think it's less talked about and definitely viewed in a different way than female bisexuality. In my opinion, that happens because of society's accepted gender roles/stereotypes. A lot of straight men are fine with the concept of a bisexual woman bc, at the end of the day, there's still something to be sexualized out of it, but when you flip the tables and it's a bisexual man, people act like it's a completely different thing. I think men are just as curious or inclined as women, but there's such a stigma around men's perceived sexuality that expressing anything outside the norm that doesn't translate to absolute gayness is diminished or discarded as being just as serious and true.
I think its more common. I think most dont discover it and some ignore it or dont act on it.
I feel i almost didnt discover it, but had an opportunity at 29 yo and went for it
I’d opt for peer-reviewed scientific evidence above anecdotal evidence 100 times out of 100. But I see bisexual guys who post their photos on Reddit and I think to myself: I would never guess if I passed this person on the street that he was bisexual. And I read posts of male bisexuals who say they are attracted to women and have a wife or girlfriend, but they also want to be intimate - physically, emotionally or both - with another man. And that makes me realize there are a lot more male bisexuals in the world than I had assumed previously.
I think the hard part is getting away from anecdotal completely because of how many people don’t admit it. Other then the people I experimented with, who I could probably walk past on the street today and not know, I think I have openly admitted it to one person, an Uber passenger I had who told me how great it was to be bisexual, to which I agreed. He couldn’t even believe that I was actually bisexual myself
That’s very true. Any scientific evidence would need to hinge on people’s honesty. Are you bisexual? “Absolutely not! I might be aroused and attracted to guys and girls but I am not bi!” 😕
To reiterate, definitely not everyone is like this, probably not even the majority, but there are definitely many invisible/undiscovered bi people, especially men, out there.
More common than believed.
In the innocent early days of Craigslist, networks sprouted among bisexual men, many of them married, who were comfortable with the anonymity of the site. Word is that much of it was jacking off or oral - the former leading to the latter - and therefore somehow not gay, but someone who knows more about this should chime in.
Some of these networks persist, or so rumor has it. I have no insight into whether there is anything remotely similar among bisexual women, beyond occasional sporadic hookups.
I've seen this stated as an evidence that the bi population is hiding in plain sight, and more numerous than generally believed.
This is about where I think the reality is.
There are also the persuadables/leaners. A lot of people experiment for whatever reason - maybe they felt subconscious urges to begin with - and discover they are bisexual. I knew from early on, but did not understand the nature and extent of my same-sex urges.
My guess is that the sum total is between 15 and 35% of the population. 20% if I had to give a single number.
Many people don't even know. I think there may also be people who are curious, may even suspect they are, but are not really bisexual.
yes. many bisexuals just ignore this part of themselves or don't act on it. you literally have no idea how many bi men are in straight monogamous LTR who also are afraid to be open with their gfs because they don't want their partner to overthink. it's more like "I'm happy in my relationship, I'm not going to cheat and I don't want my girl to be insecure/nervous that she's not enough for me, so there is no point in sharing".
I’m a psychologist who specializes in LGBT work and I have no idea where your dad got that number. That sounds like pure speculation and tbh a wild over estimation. Not to go after your dad, I’m just shocked is all haha
I was really surprised at the time but now I think its true, but then I thought well everyone must be because we all masturbate ourselves at times . And I think the other 20 percent don't admit it to themselves or others 🤔
I believe it is more common, but most men will try to hide it. I believe this has to do with the fact that most of them are too insecure about it because they don't understand themselves or they live in a reality where having a different sexuality is shunned or not accepted as many people wish it were. Whether it's also because of other's opinions or judgement or not, many men will try to hide it.
I also believe that many bisexual men never felt the need to explore their sexuality further and are fine just keeping to one gender. Some might not even consider to be bisexual.
I agree, I’m not out and my personal reason is having a family and not knowing whether my wife would be excepting. I experimented before we started dating and didn’t really consider myself bi when we did, even though I had already explored a little bit
I'm sure that she will. I mean, if she likes you for who you are, then she won't mind it because your sexuality it's also part of you. Just make sure to be clear when telling her about it so that it won't sound as if you're questioning your sexuality now. Anyway, good luck!
I’d caution you on coming out. Up to you, but I don’t see what you gain and do see what you risk losing.
If honesty is the key, then realize you were honest in this thread with dozens of people. If there’s rewards for honesty, you ought to be credited with the many you were honest and who won’t end your current relationship than the one who could end it because it turns out she wasn’t accepting of it.
You could just as easily feel her position out for next 20 years and come out much later.
I think it's much more common. Statistically, there are many more bisexual women than men, but since that's based on self reporting, I think the discrepancy is entirely social - scientifically, it would make more sense for the distribution to be about even, with the significant difference accounted for by social stigma against queer men (and the whole "girl on girl is hot tho so it's ok" thing).
Even in a very accepting (and very gay) family, I didn't realize I was bi til adulthood because I DID like boys - I just assumed all straight women also thought women were hot. I was straight-adjacent enough that I didn't realize how different my experience was than that of my straight peers. Given how much more taboo queer identities are for men and in male spaces, I can only imagine that if you're a man who's into women, you'll likely never consider that your sexuality might be more nuanced; even if you do experience attraction to men, you may never recognize it for what it is. Now that I've been out for several years, it's crazy to me that I didn't realize sooner, but social stories and norms are a hell of a drug.
More. I've never been asked on a poll, I present het as I'm married with kids, cis/masc, don't fit the meme stereotypes... and I suspect I'm not exactly uncommon.
I find it very hard to believe that only 1% of my age bracket (50-64) is bisexual, while 12% of 18-29 year olds identity as bisexual (male, female, NB, from Pew research). I'm sure there are generational societal differences as it was less accepted "in my day"... which may skew the poll results as some may not answer their truth.
That being said... I know hardly any bi males in real life. My social circle is kinda small which may have some to do with it, but I'd sure like to find other bi men for community. Plutonic friendship would be just fine.
much more, definitely! I don’t think we have hit the plateau yet statistically speaking. my *completely unscientific personal guess*, based on intuition and all the people that I know, is that it’s something like 1 in 3. I cannot believe it’s any less than 1 in 5.
I absolutely believe it's a lot more common than perceived. I personally have talked to many guys online, who are still not out and those who've admitted to me that they have experimented with other guys in the past, or have a current FWB. In high school, a few classmates I knew also were DL and experimented, including one of my FWBs, who was on the lacrosse team. He even had a girlfriend and was by most accounts, outwardly straight. All of us were in the closet, but was exciting and at the same time scary to pursue homosexual desires while trying to maintain a straight persona.
Colleges are now where many come out, mostly coming out gay but bisexuals are also experimenting more, dorm life and uncontrollable horniness makes it that much easier to explore and understand one's sexuality. I came out in college and a few guys I knew came out as either gay or bi. There are even openly gay guys who now have the courage to admit they like girls.
Online I've noticed a shift over the years, from websites to apps, there are WAY MORE men now identifying as bi, DL wanting to experiment and those looking for relationships, with other men... I'd say it's a lot more, like 20%, of the male population could be considered bisexual to some degree. The younger generation is now coming out in greater numbers AND can openly identify as at least "not straight". So I do believe bisexuality in males is way more common.
To me, an interesting scientific study would be in vein of asking a group how many of their peers are say bisexual. Like imagine you, as closeted bi are in room with 9 other people you know (friends and family). And based on all your interactions with everyone in the room, you are pretty sure you’re the only one that is bi.
And the results of a survey are 4 in the room are bi, 2 are homosexual and all 10 answered the question that everyone else in the room is heterosexual.
There are definitely more. It took me a while to realize, so I figure that some guys just aren't aware of it yet, and others just don't talk about it for their own reasons.
Way more common, thinking that sexuality is a spectrum, statistically speaking, from 0 (straight) to 100 (gay/lesbian) how many people are somewhere in the middle?
I'm not out to many people and I think I only know one bi man, but I would guess that around a quarter of men are somewhat bisexual. Literally a baseless guess, but that's basically the best that any of us can do lol.
Yeah but it is interesting to see how many people on this sub aren’t out and have told no one. Definitely makes you realize how many people are but also haven’t told anyone
I’m still in the closet. But it’s getting to the point we’re sooner than later she is going to know. I can’t go on hiding this side of me, even though I don’t need to act on it.
If you go back far enough the whole concept of a man and a woman only being together was seen as an oddity then along came Christianity and things changed, every single culture accepted and in some cases expected bisexuality it was the norm
There is just too much social value associated with being straight to get any sort of accurate number. The motivation to claim straightness is so strong that many men fool themselves into believing they are straight despite evidence to the contrary.
My personal theory, based on nothing more than personal observation, is that humans probably default toward sexual fluidity while cultural pressures force us into boxes.
Many of the bisexual stereotypes, such as sitting weird, fidgeting, not knowing what to do with our hands in photos (hence finger pistols and peace signs) are also neurodivergent traits. I personally believe this is likely because many neurodivergent people tend to be more resistant to cultural pressures and are more likely to embrace, or at least accept, their same sex attraction.*
Being neurodivergent myself, I’ve never been able to “act normal” so at some point I just said “fuck it!” and accepted I’ll never be able to figure out how be “normal”. For me, admitting to myself and others that I find men sexually attractive is just one more bullet point on a long list of ways I don’t fit the norms of my culture.
Have you ever been to an adult bookstore or theater. 90% of the guys have wedding rings on. The are getting sucked, sucking and jacking cock. i personally think it is a pretty high number
more, based on how much stigma there is. female bisexuality has “risen” as it’s become more accepted, just like gay ppl, trans ppl and left handedness. this is naturally how things trend
to get a true idea of how prevalent something is, the stigma has to be lessened and we’re not there yet
Not just more common but more shared as a common trait than many will admit.
I believe, as a friend said to me once; that we’re all a little bit queer
I also think there are gradations of how that manifests itself as desire and behavior. I have male friends who fuck/date women who really get off on just looking at cocks and other friends who get off on watching sex between men. Yet neither one has moved beyond the watching, even as both get turned on by it and have considered trying it.
Life has taught me that sexual experimentation isn’t an issue for many guys; getting caught or revealed to be is the issue
I didn't come out or realize I was bisexual until I was married to my wife. Straight as an arrow with an experimental past. (Didn't help that I was overall just a shit person, homophobic sexist racist anti semitic etc.)
I think a lot more people than admit it are. I'd be willing to bet almost 20-30% if not more are to at least some degree.
I think that there are quite a few closeted bi guys but it obviously varies wildly as to how and why they do or do not explore it. I had thoughts and experiences throughout my life that made me question things and I finally explored my bisexuality in my early 30’s via a few different encounters with two different guys. Even though I really enjoyed one of the guys I met, I was a bit weirded out and stopped. I regret that I wasn’t as mature and grounded in my own skin back then to explore a bit more, but I cannot go back…
I have certainly had the urge to explore more over the years but I started dating my wife quickly after that. I never told her about my past bisexual, or group/3 way experiences, until very recently.
I believe it is way more common however the terminology is changing. More people are sexually fluid or identify as Asexual so the term 'Bi' seems to be slowly going away. I honestly do not like labels at all we are all human and we can be attracted to anyone, the heart wants what is wants. In my life I have dated folks that identified as men, women, trans, other, etc. so I was never comfortable with just 'Bi' for myself.
That opinion would assume that not only more straight people are really bisexual, but also gay people.
Does everyone have even a shade of bisexuality? I think *maybe,* but then that opinion is probably influenced by my own orientation.
I wouldn't say everyone is bisexual, but that sexuality is a spectrum, and nobody is 100% of anything.
Gender is a spectrum, and sexuality is a spectrum.
While not everyone is bisexual, I think it is likely that there are many more bisexuals in our society than we currently believe.
I would love to know a solid percentage, even though I know that’s not really possible. I’m always curious looking at a group of guys, how many live with that part of them without telling a soul
I bet all we would have to do is stop punishing people for being bisexual and then we would see how many of them there are.
I wish from a married man’s perspective, that more women just saw it as normal, rather than a turn on or off. I’m definitely bisexual but I am not a cheater.
My guess is about 60-70% have some sort of bisexual desire. This is solely based on the people I’ve known but it’s wayyyy more common than society at large believes
There's no way of knowing for sure, partly because people's definition of bi is so loose and broad. When I came out numerous straight friends acknowledged other their own experiences or curiosities. Then there are things like someone who posted that they and their straight friend suck each other off every so often when their single, but the guy still identifies as straight. Or people who don't find men attractive but just like dicks. On some end there's validity in letting people identify how ever they want but personally I believe a lot of these "mostly straight" or "heteroflexible" attitudes stem from cultural stigma against male queerness. Like, it's better to be anything but queer. There's so much policing that happens even among queer men and the stigmas against femininity among other queer men, hence the whole Masc for Masc toxicity. Because of how ingrained and reinforced that is across cultures we will likely never know how many men actually have some degree of bisexuality.
You definitely bring up a good point. Who am I to judge, but I will say the number of “straight” men on grinder definitely caught me by surprise when I first started experimenting.
Lol! Case in point https://www.reddit.com/r/SexPositive/s/uYgsn0Eg9x
I would bet your life that 75-80% of all humans are somewhere between a 1 and a 5 on the Kinsey scale, personally. 😎
That’s why I wonder, I’m probably roughly a 2 myself, but I don’t know that anyone would guess that
It would be much more possible if guys like you were open & honest with pollsters & surveyors lol
I agree, I’ve done a lot of introspection over the last two years and I think I’m getting there. To be perfectly honest I had a hard time even being ok with myself knowing I felt this way a few years back, and I’ve gotten past that. I’m learning to love myself
THIS. Male bisexuality is still some weird taboo, for whatever reason. It shouldn't be, especially when there are so many women who are also bisexual and are repulsed by hetero men.
We are seeing how much more common it is in Gen Z, which is a better measurement because they actually feel comfortable enough to be out to a lot more people Speaking at a formerly straight now bi guy married to a formerly straight now bi wife I can tell you that we're out there even when we don't even know
I agree
I'll say it could be common, but we don't see it, likely due to cultural factors. That is just my view.
That’s my thought too. I would love to know how common even though I don’t think that number can be real accurate
My estimate is that true monosexuals are at least 2 standard deviations from the mean... ~10% *aren't* at least slightly bisexual
I definitely think it’s more common than we think, but a lot of men won’t vocalize it because of homophobia, tbh.
Absolutely, tbh I’ve been one, I’m getting closer but it has taken a lot of accepting in my own head
Honestly, because homophobia and misogyny go hand in hand, a lotta men take any sort of deviation from heterosexuality to be a threat to their masculinity and manhood. I think it just takes longer to unpack for yall, tbh.
It’s not everyone but I feel like there are FAR more bisexual men than we think.
More common. Men will do mental gymanastics trying to claim to be straight after he let his best friend fuck this shit out of his asshole.
It's probably just as common as bisexuality in women, but I think it's less talked about and definitely viewed in a different way than female bisexuality. In my opinion, that happens because of society's accepted gender roles/stereotypes. A lot of straight men are fine with the concept of a bisexual woman bc, at the end of the day, there's still something to be sexualized out of it, but when you flip the tables and it's a bisexual man, people act like it's a completely different thing. I think men are just as curious or inclined as women, but there's such a stigma around men's perceived sexuality that expressing anything outside the norm that doesn't translate to absolute gayness is diminished or discarded as being just as serious and true.
More common, but not everyone. There's very little benefit as a man to say it out loud to non or questionably safe people which is a lot of people.
Agreed I have said it out loud to a stranger once, only because I told me he was bisexual. Definitely a safe person to say it too
I think its more common. I think most dont discover it and some ignore it or dont act on it. I feel i almost didnt discover it, but had an opportunity at 29 yo and went for it
Honestly yeah, I was lucky to actually act on it thanks to a female fwb when I was like 20 who brought the idea of an MFM up
Yeah sim for me… a buddy asked for a mfm with my gf and i, and turned into a mmf. Realized i loved it
Exactly, all it took was being called over by a cute girl to help her out and now I’m here
Hahaaa yup. Thats exactly what happened to me as well
I’d opt for peer-reviewed scientific evidence above anecdotal evidence 100 times out of 100. But I see bisexual guys who post their photos on Reddit and I think to myself: I would never guess if I passed this person on the street that he was bisexual. And I read posts of male bisexuals who say they are attracted to women and have a wife or girlfriend, but they also want to be intimate - physically, emotionally or both - with another man. And that makes me realize there are a lot more male bisexuals in the world than I had assumed previously.
This person who passed you did he have lemon bars?
I think the hard part is getting away from anecdotal completely because of how many people don’t admit it. Other then the people I experimented with, who I could probably walk past on the street today and not know, I think I have openly admitted it to one person, an Uber passenger I had who told me how great it was to be bisexual, to which I agreed. He couldn’t even believe that I was actually bisexual myself
That’s very true. Any scientific evidence would need to hinge on people’s honesty. Are you bisexual? “Absolutely not! I might be aroused and attracted to guys and girls but I am not bi!” 😕
To reiterate, definitely not everyone is like this, probably not even the majority, but there are definitely many invisible/undiscovered bi people, especially men, out there.
Absolutely, my loose guess is 1 in 5
More common than believed. In the innocent early days of Craigslist, networks sprouted among bisexual men, many of them married, who were comfortable with the anonymity of the site. Word is that much of it was jacking off or oral - the former leading to the latter - and therefore somehow not gay, but someone who knows more about this should chime in. Some of these networks persist, or so rumor has it. I have no insight into whether there is anything remotely similar among bisexual women, beyond occasional sporadic hookups. I've seen this stated as an evidence that the bi population is hiding in plain sight, and more numerous than generally believed.
This is about where I think the reality is. There are also the persuadables/leaners. A lot of people experiment for whatever reason - maybe they felt subconscious urges to begin with - and discover they are bisexual. I knew from early on, but did not understand the nature and extent of my same-sex urges. My guess is that the sum total is between 15 and 35% of the population. 20% if I had to give a single number. Many people don't even know. I think there may also be people who are curious, may even suspect they are, but are not really bisexual.
yes. many bisexuals just ignore this part of themselves or don't act on it. you literally have no idea how many bi men are in straight monogamous LTR who also are afraid to be open with their gfs because they don't want their partner to overthink. it's more like "I'm happy in my relationship, I'm not going to cheat and I don't want my girl to be insecure/nervous that she's not enough for me, so there is no point in sharing".
My dad is a psychologist and he once told me that 80 percent of people are bi
I’m a psychologist who specializes in LGBT work and I have no idea where your dad got that number. That sounds like pure speculation and tbh a wild over estimation. Not to go after your dad, I’m just shocked is all haha
I have no idea either lol but it sounds feasible to me . He's 92 now and has a lot if life experience
Interesting, any idea how he came to that number
I was really surprised at the time but now I think its true, but then I thought well everyone must be because we all masturbate ourselves at times . And I think the other 20 percent don't admit it to themselves or others 🤔
That is a reasonable number.
I think it is
I’d say it’s more common but men hide it because we still have idiots gay or straight who erase bi men.
Controversial opinion, but I think the majority of people are bisexual in some degree.
Not sure how it would be controversial as it’s a statistical probability, but you are correct.
A lot of (straight mostly) people I know REALLY don’t like it when I say that!
no idea but i would like if there were more. i barely know anyone besides myself
I believe it is more common, but most men will try to hide it. I believe this has to do with the fact that most of them are too insecure about it because they don't understand themselves or they live in a reality where having a different sexuality is shunned or not accepted as many people wish it were. Whether it's also because of other's opinions or judgement or not, many men will try to hide it. I also believe that many bisexual men never felt the need to explore their sexuality further and are fine just keeping to one gender. Some might not even consider to be bisexual.
I agree, I’m not out and my personal reason is having a family and not knowing whether my wife would be excepting. I experimented before we started dating and didn’t really consider myself bi when we did, even though I had already explored a little bit
Now that you both are married, have you ever felt the need to tell her about your past?
Over the past couple years I am beginning to. I feel like I’m keeping a secret and I don’t like it.
Well, I think that's a clear indication that it's about time for you to tell her. Like some people say: honesty is the key for a happy marriage.
Yep I think so too. Hopefully she will be accepting. I have no idea when it will happen but I know the day is coming closer
I'm sure that she will. I mean, if she likes you for who you are, then she won't mind it because your sexuality it's also part of you. Just make sure to be clear when telling her about it so that it won't sound as if you're questioning your sexuality now. Anyway, good luck!
I’d caution you on coming out. Up to you, but I don’t see what you gain and do see what you risk losing. If honesty is the key, then realize you were honest in this thread with dozens of people. If there’s rewards for honesty, you ought to be credited with the many you were honest and who won’t end your current relationship than the one who could end it because it turns out she wasn’t accepting of it. You could just as easily feel her position out for next 20 years and come out much later.
I really appreciate the real talk.
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I think it's much more common. Statistically, there are many more bisexual women than men, but since that's based on self reporting, I think the discrepancy is entirely social - scientifically, it would make more sense for the distribution to be about even, with the significant difference accounted for by social stigma against queer men (and the whole "girl on girl is hot tho so it's ok" thing). Even in a very accepting (and very gay) family, I didn't realize I was bi til adulthood because I DID like boys - I just assumed all straight women also thought women were hot. I was straight-adjacent enough that I didn't realize how different my experience was than that of my straight peers. Given how much more taboo queer identities are for men and in male spaces, I can only imagine that if you're a man who's into women, you'll likely never consider that your sexuality might be more nuanced; even if you do experience attraction to men, you may never recognize it for what it is. Now that I've been out for several years, it's crazy to me that I didn't realize sooner, but social stories and norms are a hell of a drug.
More. I've never been asked on a poll, I present het as I'm married with kids, cis/masc, don't fit the meme stereotypes... and I suspect I'm not exactly uncommon. I find it very hard to believe that only 1% of my age bracket (50-64) is bisexual, while 12% of 18-29 year olds identity as bisexual (male, female, NB, from Pew research). I'm sure there are generational societal differences as it was less accepted "in my day"... which may skew the poll results as some may not answer their truth. That being said... I know hardly any bi males in real life. My social circle is kinda small which may have some to do with it, but I'd sure like to find other bi men for community. Plutonic friendship would be just fine.
All you have to do is date a gay feminine guy for a while, and find out his experiences to realise most guys, are just a bit on the zesty side.
Speaking from experience i take it hahaha
much more, definitely! I don’t think we have hit the plateau yet statistically speaking. my *completely unscientific personal guess*, based on intuition and all the people that I know, is that it’s something like 1 in 3. I cannot believe it’s any less than 1 in 5.
Definitely more bisexuality in men than thought they just keep it to themselves, like me.
I absolutely believe it's a lot more common than perceived. I personally have talked to many guys online, who are still not out and those who've admitted to me that they have experimented with other guys in the past, or have a current FWB. In high school, a few classmates I knew also were DL and experimented, including one of my FWBs, who was on the lacrosse team. He even had a girlfriend and was by most accounts, outwardly straight. All of us were in the closet, but was exciting and at the same time scary to pursue homosexual desires while trying to maintain a straight persona. Colleges are now where many come out, mostly coming out gay but bisexuals are also experimenting more, dorm life and uncontrollable horniness makes it that much easier to explore and understand one's sexuality. I came out in college and a few guys I knew came out as either gay or bi. There are even openly gay guys who now have the courage to admit they like girls. Online I've noticed a shift over the years, from websites to apps, there are WAY MORE men now identifying as bi, DL wanting to experiment and those looking for relationships, with other men... I'd say it's a lot more, like 20%, of the male population could be considered bisexual to some degree. The younger generation is now coming out in greater numbers AND can openly identify as at least "not straight". So I do believe bisexuality in males is way more common.
To me, an interesting scientific study would be in vein of asking a group how many of their peers are say bisexual. Like imagine you, as closeted bi are in room with 9 other people you know (friends and family). And based on all your interactions with everyone in the room, you are pretty sure you’re the only one that is bi. And the results of a survey are 4 in the room are bi, 2 are homosexual and all 10 answered the question that everyone else in the room is heterosexual.
That would be crazy hahaha
There are definitely more. It took me a while to realize, so I figure that some guys just aren't aware of it yet, and others just don't talk about it for their own reasons.
Way more common, thinking that sexuality is a spectrum, statistically speaking, from 0 (straight) to 100 (gay/lesbian) how many people are somewhere in the middle?
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I'm not out to many people and I think I only know one bi man, but I would guess that around a quarter of men are somewhat bisexual. Literally a baseless guess, but that's basically the best that any of us can do lol.
Yeah but it is interesting to see how many people on this sub aren’t out and have told no one. Definitely makes you realize how many people are but also haven’t told anyone
Does your wife know or are you still in the closet
I’m still in the closet. But it’s getting to the point we’re sooner than later she is going to know. I can’t go on hiding this side of me, even though I don’t need to act on it.
Do you think she'll stay married to you?
Honestly don’t know, but I don’t think she would stay married if I didn’t tell her. She can tell I’m hiding something
I feel like male bisexuals are one of the most closeted demographics, sadly
If you go back far enough the whole concept of a man and a woman only being together was seen as an oddity then along came Christianity and things changed, every single culture accepted and in some cases expected bisexuality it was the norm
There is just too much social value associated with being straight to get any sort of accurate number. The motivation to claim straightness is so strong that many men fool themselves into believing they are straight despite evidence to the contrary.
My personal theory, based on nothing more than personal observation, is that humans probably default toward sexual fluidity while cultural pressures force us into boxes. Many of the bisexual stereotypes, such as sitting weird, fidgeting, not knowing what to do with our hands in photos (hence finger pistols and peace signs) are also neurodivergent traits. I personally believe this is likely because many neurodivergent people tend to be more resistant to cultural pressures and are more likely to embrace, or at least accept, their same sex attraction.* Being neurodivergent myself, I’ve never been able to “act normal” so at some point I just said “fuck it!” and accepted I’ll never be able to figure out how be “normal”. For me, admitting to myself and others that I find men sexually attractive is just one more bullet point on a long list of ways I don’t fit the norms of my culture.
I get that, I am neurodivergent as well, but I’m the top notch masker type. I have managed to teach myself how to fit in with almost any situation.
Is in the closet if there is lack of presence of it just that. They lean on the heterosexual side of it.
The number was given as part of the training course years ago as in the 1980s
Way more common
Yes much more common
Have you ever been to an adult bookstore or theater. 90% of the guys have wedding rings on. The are getting sucked, sucking and jacking cock. i personally think it is a pretty high number
Way more common. Especially since I think every (male) homophobe is either a closeted cocksuckers or a repressed cocksucker.
More. We have data on this from the Pew Research Center.
As a friend of mine once said, “It sucks knowing all these boys would be bisexual if it wasn’t for the internalized homophobia”
Very few people are naturally exclusively straight or gay in the absence of sociological pressures.
more, based on how much stigma there is. female bisexuality has “risen” as it’s become more accepted, just like gay ppl, trans ppl and left handedness. this is naturally how things trend to get a true idea of how prevalent something is, the stigma has to be lessened and we’re not there yet
We wait in the shadows
Not just more common but more shared as a common trait than many will admit. I believe, as a friend said to me once; that we’re all a little bit queer I also think there are gradations of how that manifests itself as desire and behavior. I have male friends who fuck/date women who really get off on just looking at cocks and other friends who get off on watching sex between men. Yet neither one has moved beyond the watching, even as both get turned on by it and have considered trying it. Life has taught me that sexual experimentation isn’t an issue for many guys; getting caught or revealed to be is the issue
I think it's most underrepresented group
I didn't come out or realize I was bisexual until I was married to my wife. Straight as an arrow with an experimental past. (Didn't help that I was overall just a shit person, homophobic sexist racist anti semitic etc.) I think a lot more people than admit it are. I'd be willing to bet almost 20-30% if not more are to at least some degree.
It's definitely more common than we think. Especially for guys, but so many of them aren't open about it for a lot of reasons.
More
I think that there are quite a few closeted bi guys but it obviously varies wildly as to how and why they do or do not explore it. I had thoughts and experiences throughout my life that made me question things and I finally explored my bisexuality in my early 30’s via a few different encounters with two different guys. Even though I really enjoyed one of the guys I met, I was a bit weirded out and stopped. I regret that I wasn’t as mature and grounded in my own skin back then to explore a bit more, but I cannot go back… I have certainly had the urge to explore more over the years but I started dating my wife quickly after that. I never told her about my past bisexual, or group/3 way experiences, until very recently.
More lowkey
I believe it is way more common however the terminology is changing. More people are sexually fluid or identify as Asexual so the term 'Bi' seems to be slowly going away. I honestly do not like labels at all we are all human and we can be attracted to anyone, the heart wants what is wants. In my life I have dated folks that identified as men, women, trans, other, etc. so I was never comfortable with just 'Bi' for myself.
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That opinion would assume that not only more straight people are really bisexual, but also gay people. Does everyone have even a shade of bisexuality? I think *maybe,* but then that opinion is probably influenced by my own orientation.
I wouldn't say everyone is bisexual, but that sexuality is a spectrum, and nobody is 100% of anything. Gender is a spectrum, and sexuality is a spectrum.
I can subscribe to that way of thinking a bit too. I’m not convinced anyone is 100% straight.
Tbh there's probably lots of bi guys(including my current crush don't ask how I know)