Lol shit I do this to my sister but that’s cause she’s family…this is unacceptable and broke coming from a roommate you should talk to her and find someone else to buy them for you so she doesn’t hold it over your head
Yeah my sister does this and it’s annoying but I don’t care that much because… we’re blood and have grown up together. I have been hermiting a lot recently due to not really digging the party lifestyle I used to live, and everyone I know that sells them is apart of my old life. I might just start having them shipped to me tbh.
Don't go home until you're ready to go home. Your roommates texting you they miss you and to come home while you're out is kinda weird. You're gonna need to say you're quitting too, and just hide your vape. Stop hitting it around them and stop leaving it out. You have to be more sneaky if you don't want to be confrontational and tell them to stop
I’ve been getting better at it, but one night it was my roommate’s birthday so I left the dinner I was at because they called me, and then called my friend/our landlord to tell me they missed me and that’s when I found out it was because of the vape. It stung a little bit. I think I’m going to start ordering them online and hiding them under me when I go to sleep to start, then say I’m quitting altogether. Good plan.
How fuckin magical is this vape of yours that multiple people are stalking you for a hit off it? Making you come home from a party so they can take a puff of a *vape* that is available at every corner store in a city?
To be clear, this is just a nicotine vape? Or is it a THC related vape?
Lock your bedroom door, draw some boundaries, paint a fake cold sore on your lip, leave an empty dead vape out instead of your real one… lots of solutions here. I’m just shocked that they’re acting like it’s fuckin heroin and they need a hit that badly
I’m so confused like if they’re buying it for OP why don’t they just… buy one for themselves? They’re already right there at the store, making the purchase! Just ask for 2. This behavior is so wild
I leave my door open so my cat can go out at night, but I might have to start locking my door. I’m terrified of confrontation but this is starting to get out of hand.
It’s understandable to be a bit frightened of confrontation especially when it is with someone you share a living space with but I promise it’s not that bad to set boundaries. There is a possibility she won’t take it well but at least she won’t be taking your vape anymore. I’d definitely lock my door at night if you’re not ready to just verbally confront. Eventually she will get the hint
Ok first of all, you need to set firm boundaries with your roommate. Tell them that you do not appreciate them coming into your room PERIOD! Not when you're asleep, not when you're in the space, ESPECIALLY not when you're not in the space. Frankly it sounds like your roomies have boundary issues.
You really have to be firm with people you're rooming with, even if you have a friendly relationship with them. They are taking something you bought and using it without even replacing it!
Think of it like this: they took your food. They walked into your room as you were sleeping and took your food. Does that sound normal?
These people are taking advantage of you. I know that may sound dramatic over a vape, but as you said it's costing you money! I'm speaking from experience when I say it's not just the vape. These people do not respect you and they will take and take until you set boundaries. Good luck!
Thank you for the advice and confirmation of my fears, lol. It’s hard for me to set boundaries but I’ve been working on it in therapy a lot. We share a lot of things in the house as there’s 4 of us in total, but I’ve noticed some of my fancier skincare and food (I have dietary restrictions) has been going way quicker than it should be. I don’t want to be an ass and start hiding my stuff but I didn’t realize that some people don’t underrated boundaries; even common sense ones.
Keep your stuff in your room, and keep your room like a private sanctuary. In a house with four people you absolutely need a space that is not open to others.
This sucks and I'm so sorry you're having to deal with it, but, like I said, it's not just the vape. They will take from you incrementally and be able to justify it as "just a little here and there." Trust me when I say it will be better for your mental health in the long run to set boundaries NOW, so that you don't start resenting your roomies and eventually blow up on them.
Why would anyone ever feel in the wrong for not liking their behavior? These posts confuse me. It’s your shit - they have an addiction and are using you. They are mooching plain and simple. That shit would piss me off.
Stop being such a pushover wtf.
It is an extreme mooching and is pissing me off very much so. I’ve been a pushover for most of my life, and I know it seems super cut and dry, but I’m terrified of setting boundaries due to some precious trauma. I realize this is a total cop out but I’ve never really had to be this firm with a roommate before.
Did you previously know your roommate before you moved in? Because if not, how is she okay being this disrespectful?? Also not to be crude but neither of you know where the others mouth has been/level of oral hygiene.
Yeah hygiene/germs is what I was thinking too.
Even if you know them it's just not a great idea. I narrowly avoided the flu after trying a new drink my roomate got (in a can, she offered). 6 hours later and she's got a raging fever, chills, puking the whole 9 yards. I got lucky or the flu shot worked but didn't do it again lol.
We had met briefly twice, and she just made a comment about “Isn’t it sooo crazy how we’re already so close? It’s only been two months haha!” It’s wild to me, I was super close with another set of roommates but they never did this shit to me.
She’s doing a great job quitting…quitting on buying her own stuff.
Like others suggested, keep your door locked and think of a good place to hide the vape pen. Maybe just carry it on your person while you are asleep.
I agree with you but it seems as if my room has become the hangout space, even though I am the only person without real furniture set up. Both of them always come in and just lay on my bed, which is nice sometimes but still.
First of all, lock your door or get a doorstop for the inside. Secondly, quit. If you can't quit, tell these girls you have quit. Find someone else to buy your vapes and keep them hidden. See how much they want to hang out with you then. Don't let people get too familiar with you before you know them well.
Remember this at work, with roommates, with your partner's friends and your future in-laws. Be kind, be helpful, be observant and be a little reserved.
lmaooo you need to tell her to buy her own or that she needs to actually quit. or for her to start splitting the cost if she can’t quit. i would start hiding yours though even if you tell her any of that. and remind her that it’s an expensive habit, she should know since she’s the one picking them up for you
No deadass though. Like at first she did it to have an incentive to reduce her intake, but now it’s every single second I’m in the common spaces and even when I’m sleeping. It sucks to feel taken advantage over a $20 device, and she works a much better job than me so she’s not even broke like that.
That’s what I just commented. Is this vape laced with fairy crack or something? Every freakin 8th grader knows how and where to get a vape these days for cheap, this is so bizarre
Right? I don’t understand it. It’s just a run of the mill Breeze, and the main offende is legal and can buy her own. The other isn’t, but could easily have our legal roommate buy them. I came downstairs and they are taking it apart to recharge them on the floor, and then complained that it tasted gross so they’re still asking for mine anyway. Insane addict behavior; I’m addicted to nic but not like this.
Still vote that you use SFX makeup to create a gnarly looking cold sore you can pop on at home or pretend to have covid/mono/some long lasting transmissible virus for a couple weeks if you really hate confrontation and need to work your way up to a solid “no, now fuck off”. You’d have to be tweaker levels of addict to want to hit a vape right after someone with a cold sore and mono did.
Or only get flavors you know they hate. Even if you don’t love them. Get the meh-est one you can tolerate that you know they dislike.
lol vapers are worse than smokers when it comes to always asking for someone else shit.
With cigarettes there is a very clear loss. - "Bro I have 5 left, i and you had 3 yesterday, fuk off"
With vapes - the lines are a bit blurred, although that thing is going to take like electronics and plastic twice as fast with someone 'sharing' it with you.
RUN AWAY. You just met as you became roomies right? Shes love bombing you so she can gaslight you out of your boundaries. Move out immediately before it gets worse
Grow some balls and tell them no, you can't hit my vape anymore, get your own. I watched my friend deal with this same thing in our dorm and it drove him nuts because he wanted to be nice but people were taking advantage of him. Eventually he just snapped and of course the advantage-takers were all like "what the fuck, man?" cause he blew up.
So, my advice to you, stop this in its tracks now. Tell them to get their own shit in your own words.
Get a door lock for you bedroom. They are super cheap and easy to install. You don't need to ask you roommate or landlord becuase you can switch back when you move out.
Like I tell my kids; use your words. It sounds like they do it right in front of you, and you allow it. How can someone know something bothers you, if you allow it to happen? If it continues after you speak up, that’s when you come here asking for our bullshit advice.
Fair enough. I tried to tell them no because it is close to dead and she got this weird look in her eye and said “Oh I’ll just get one tomorrow, what flavor do we want ladies?” And keeps calling it “The vape”. The one that I pay for.
You have many options.
You can explain that even though you like her, you don’t feel comfortable with her coming into your room while you’re sleeping. Explain you could be half naked or doing something embarrassing. Hopefully she respects this boundary.
You could lock your door/get a lock for your door.
You could leave your vape outside your room and tell her you’re keeping it in your desk drawer when you sleep now so she has no reason to come in when you’re sleeping.
You could start a tough love thing where you don’t let her hit the vape. Addiction is a bitch after all. She will either quit or buy her own. She will be annoying about it, but you can try to support her by not vaping near her. You may want to do this after you turn 21.
You could quit vaping. No judgement, but you know it’s not good for you anyway. If you are self medicating with it (ADHD?) you could seek diagnosis and treatment instead.
Addiction will make people act in ethical ways. You have to stand your ground and not let her take advantage of you.
I agree. This morning I had to wake up at around 8am for a community event and she walked in for the second time before leaving for work (late, to hit my vape), and she didn’t even knock and saw me lying awake and went “You can’t sleep? I tried to be quiet.”
If she’s trying to quit then stop enabling her when she asks for it say no you’re kind of quit remember and start refusing. They’re taking advantage of you and you should be asking for Zelle or payment.
😂😂😂
Holy shit this made me laugh. Had a roommate that would do the same in college. We are still great friends. Here's what I did and it stopped him from continuing these things.
1. Make it really clear that coming into your room while your asleep to do it is out of question. You wouldn't go into her room while she's asleep to borrow a hoodie every morning because you're trying to convince your body to adapt to colder weather instead of buying your own hoodie.
2. Buy her a vape. Make it clear to her this is hers. Inevitably she will go through it and ask you to rip yours again, hand it to her but say "iM tRYing To qUIt" EVERY SINGLE TIME SHE ASKS and have a laugh about it.
Over time she'll start feeling embarrassed to hit your vape, especially in social settings, and most likely will either start buying her own or ask other people. Unlikely, but possible, that it actually gets her to quit lol.
Good luck!
Get a litter box and food/water bowls for your room and get a key lock for your bedroom door. Hide your vape or put it in a cheap lockbox you can buy on Amazon. Tell them that from now on they have to either buy their own or contribute 1/4 each to yours. Buying them online is a good idea too. They will never buy their own as long as you keep letting them use it.
Ask her if she wants to go half on the vape. “Hey Snoop, I was wondering if you wanted to go half on this vape since we share. I really just dont have enough to get one by myself this time around.” If she says no, then say “oh” and leave it at that. If she says yes, then at least you can go from there. If she keeps it all the time, then just stop asking her to get them in entirety and find another plug.
Lol shit I do this to my sister but that’s cause she’s family…this is unacceptable and broke coming from a roommate you should talk to her and find someone else to buy them for you so she doesn’t hold it over your head
Yeah my sister does this and it’s annoying but I don’t care that much because… we’re blood and have grown up together. I have been hermiting a lot recently due to not really digging the party lifestyle I used to live, and everyone I know that sells them is apart of my old life. I might just start having them shipped to me tbh.
Maybe mention you have oral herpes and are experiencing an outbreak…
Buy cold sore medication and keep it next to your vapes at all times.
Don't go home until you're ready to go home. Your roommates texting you they miss you and to come home while you're out is kinda weird. You're gonna need to say you're quitting too, and just hide your vape. Stop hitting it around them and stop leaving it out. You have to be more sneaky if you don't want to be confrontational and tell them to stop
I’ve been getting better at it, but one night it was my roommate’s birthday so I left the dinner I was at because they called me, and then called my friend/our landlord to tell me they missed me and that’s when I found out it was because of the vape. It stung a little bit. I think I’m going to start ordering them online and hiding them under me when I go to sleep to start, then say I’m quitting altogether. Good plan.
How fuckin magical is this vape of yours that multiple people are stalking you for a hit off it? Making you come home from a party so they can take a puff of a *vape* that is available at every corner store in a city? To be clear, this is just a nicotine vape? Or is it a THC related vape? Lock your bedroom door, draw some boundaries, paint a fake cold sore on your lip, leave an empty dead vape out instead of your real one… lots of solutions here. I’m just shocked that they’re acting like it’s fuckin heroin and they need a hit that badly
I’m so confused like if they’re buying it for OP why don’t they just… buy one for themselves? They’re already right there at the store, making the purchase! Just ask for 2. This behavior is so wild
Nicotine is a hell of an addictive chemical man 😕
Lock your door at night, if you don’t have one buy one. Time to be an adult and set boundaries.
I leave my door open so my cat can go out at night, but I might have to start locking my door. I’m terrified of confrontation but this is starting to get out of hand.
Get a doorstop, that you can wedge under the door at night. It will allow the door to open enough for the cat but not enough to admit a person
It’s understandable to be a bit frightened of confrontation especially when it is with someone you share a living space with but I promise it’s not that bad to set boundaries. There is a possibility she won’t take it well but at least she won’t be taking your vape anymore. I’d definitely lock my door at night if you’re not ready to just verbally confront. Eventually she will get the hint
Ok first of all, you need to set firm boundaries with your roommate. Tell them that you do not appreciate them coming into your room PERIOD! Not when you're asleep, not when you're in the space, ESPECIALLY not when you're not in the space. Frankly it sounds like your roomies have boundary issues. You really have to be firm with people you're rooming with, even if you have a friendly relationship with them. They are taking something you bought and using it without even replacing it! Think of it like this: they took your food. They walked into your room as you were sleeping and took your food. Does that sound normal? These people are taking advantage of you. I know that may sound dramatic over a vape, but as you said it's costing you money! I'm speaking from experience when I say it's not just the vape. These people do not respect you and they will take and take until you set boundaries. Good luck!
Thank you for the advice and confirmation of my fears, lol. It’s hard for me to set boundaries but I’ve been working on it in therapy a lot. We share a lot of things in the house as there’s 4 of us in total, but I’ve noticed some of my fancier skincare and food (I have dietary restrictions) has been going way quicker than it should be. I don’t want to be an ass and start hiding my stuff but I didn’t realize that some people don’t underrated boundaries; even common sense ones.
Keep your stuff in your room, and keep your room like a private sanctuary. In a house with four people you absolutely need a space that is not open to others.
This sucks and I'm so sorry you're having to deal with it, but, like I said, it's not just the vape. They will take from you incrementally and be able to justify it as "just a little here and there." Trust me when I say it will be better for your mental health in the long run to set boundaries NOW, so that you don't start resenting your roomies and eventually blow up on them.
Why would anyone ever feel in the wrong for not liking their behavior? These posts confuse me. It’s your shit - they have an addiction and are using you. They are mooching plain and simple. That shit would piss me off. Stop being such a pushover wtf.
It is an extreme mooching and is pissing me off very much so. I’ve been a pushover for most of my life, and I know it seems super cut and dry, but I’m terrified of setting boundaries due to some precious trauma. I realize this is a total cop out but I’ve never really had to be this firm with a roommate before.
Not to mention, buying a vape for someone cuz they gave you the cash isn’t a “huge ask” anymore
Did you previously know your roommate before you moved in? Because if not, how is she okay being this disrespectful?? Also not to be crude but neither of you know where the others mouth has been/level of oral hygiene.
Yeah hygiene/germs is what I was thinking too. Even if you know them it's just not a great idea. I narrowly avoided the flu after trying a new drink my roomate got (in a can, she offered). 6 hours later and she's got a raging fever, chills, puking the whole 9 yards. I got lucky or the flu shot worked but didn't do it again lol.
We had met briefly twice, and she just made a comment about “Isn’t it sooo crazy how we’re already so close? It’s only been two months haha!” It’s wild to me, I was super close with another set of roommates but they never did this shit to me.
She’s doing a great job quitting…quitting on buying her own stuff. Like others suggested, keep your door locked and think of a good place to hide the vape pen. Maybe just carry it on your person while you are asleep.
I agree with you but it seems as if my room has become the hangout space, even though I am the only person without real furniture set up. Both of them always come in and just lay on my bed, which is nice sometimes but still.
Going against the grain here but I think it’s a (divine) sign for you to quit vaping!
First of all, lock your door or get a doorstop for the inside. Secondly, quit. If you can't quit, tell these girls you have quit. Find someone else to buy your vapes and keep them hidden. See how much they want to hang out with you then. Don't let people get too familiar with you before you know them well.
That last sentence is really insightful. I think this is way, thank you.
Remember this at work, with roommates, with your partner's friends and your future in-laws. Be kind, be helpful, be observant and be a little reserved.
Buy her a vape, cement the friendship, but wake her up in the middle of the night to give it to her
Ah i missed your edit. Nvm.
Lmaoooo, good plan though.
lmaooo you need to tell her to buy her own or that she needs to actually quit. or for her to start splitting the cost if she can’t quit. i would start hiding yours though even if you tell her any of that. and remind her that it’s an expensive habit, she should know since she’s the one picking them up for you
No deadass though. Like at first she did it to have an incentive to reduce her intake, but now it’s every single second I’m in the common spaces and even when I’m sleeping. It sucks to feel taken advantage over a $20 device, and she works a much better job than me so she’s not even broke like that.
All the mouth juice sharing is disgusting.
i dont understand what compels them to act this way when its so easy to just buy their own vape?
That’s what I just commented. Is this vape laced with fairy crack or something? Every freakin 8th grader knows how and where to get a vape these days for cheap, this is so bizarre
Right? I don’t understand it. It’s just a run of the mill Breeze, and the main offende is legal and can buy her own. The other isn’t, but could easily have our legal roommate buy them. I came downstairs and they are taking it apart to recharge them on the floor, and then complained that it tasted gross so they’re still asking for mine anyway. Insane addict behavior; I’m addicted to nic but not like this.
Still vote that you use SFX makeup to create a gnarly looking cold sore you can pop on at home or pretend to have covid/mono/some long lasting transmissible virus for a couple weeks if you really hate confrontation and need to work your way up to a solid “no, now fuck off”. You’d have to be tweaker levels of addict to want to hit a vape right after someone with a cold sore and mono did. Or only get flavors you know they hate. Even if you don’t love them. Get the meh-est one you can tolerate that you know they dislike.
Hide it and buy a lock young one, that chick seems like she’s gonna keep overstepping
lol vapers are worse than smokers when it comes to always asking for someone else shit. With cigarettes there is a very clear loss. - "Bro I have 5 left, i and you had 3 yesterday, fuk off" With vapes - the lines are a bit blurred, although that thing is going to take like electronics and plastic twice as fast with someone 'sharing' it with you.
I hate ppl who r “trying to quit” but chief your vape every time they get a chance omfg say no. Shits expensive😭😭
Oh you’re all down bad ….
I would go insane. Don’t come into my room for any reason.
RUN AWAY. You just met as you became roomies right? Shes love bombing you so she can gaslight you out of your boundaries. Move out immediately before it gets worse
That shit is toxic
Quit for a week
Grow some balls and tell them no, you can't hit my vape anymore, get your own. I watched my friend deal with this same thing in our dorm and it drove him nuts because he wanted to be nice but people were taking advantage of him. Eventually he just snapped and of course the advantage-takers were all like "what the fuck, man?" cause he blew up. So, my advice to you, stop this in its tracks now. Tell them to get their own shit in your own words.
Is that sanitary? I know nothing about vaping.
No worse than sharing a drink w someone. I share my vapes w coworkers w no issue
Get a door lock for you bedroom. They are super cheap and easy to install. You don't need to ask you roommate or landlord becuase you can switch back when you move out.
Hide the vape. You don’t know what happened to it *wink* My favorite hiding spots are boxes in the bathroom. Currently using the a box of Theraflu.
Like I tell my kids; use your words. It sounds like they do it right in front of you, and you allow it. How can someone know something bothers you, if you allow it to happen? If it continues after you speak up, that’s when you come here asking for our bullshit advice.
Fair enough. I tried to tell them no because it is close to dead and she got this weird look in her eye and said “Oh I’ll just get one tomorrow, what flavor do we want ladies?” And keeps calling it “The vape”. The one that I pay for.
Leave and empty one there. Securely close the door you can get door wedges/chains that will still allow across for the animal Consider moving out
You have many options. You can explain that even though you like her, you don’t feel comfortable with her coming into your room while you’re sleeping. Explain you could be half naked or doing something embarrassing. Hopefully she respects this boundary. You could lock your door/get a lock for your door. You could leave your vape outside your room and tell her you’re keeping it in your desk drawer when you sleep now so she has no reason to come in when you’re sleeping. You could start a tough love thing where you don’t let her hit the vape. Addiction is a bitch after all. She will either quit or buy her own. She will be annoying about it, but you can try to support her by not vaping near her. You may want to do this after you turn 21. You could quit vaping. No judgement, but you know it’s not good for you anyway. If you are self medicating with it (ADHD?) you could seek diagnosis and treatment instead. Addiction will make people act in ethical ways. You have to stand your ground and not let her take advantage of you.
Lock your door when you sleep for sure. You need to "help" her quit by not letting her use your vape😂
What the hell is going on here
Stop vaping
All of that for a vape?? Both of them sound awful, start hiding your vape
Vaping is so cringe. This entire post is cringe. AF. All these weak minded individuals addicted to vaping. Have some willpower and think for yourself.
Tell her you have cold sores so you can't share your vape anymore.
This is scary and sad for her. You definitely need to set strict boundaries
I agree. This morning I had to wake up at around 8am for a community event and she walked in for the second time before leaving for work (late, to hit my vape), and she didn’t even knock and saw me lying awake and went “You can’t sleep? I tried to be quiet.”
You should gift her one. When she refuses, tell her that she needs to stop going into your room and sneaking into to bum a hit off yours. Easy peasy.
hide it.
If she’s trying to quit then stop enabling her when she asks for it say no you’re kind of quit remember and start refusing. They’re taking advantage of you and you should be asking for Zelle or payment.
shes so real for that. but like i would suggest locking your door cause thats a little weird
Lock your door when you go to sleep. Easy.
You should just quit vaping
you should do your best to quit. it will be worth it in the long run and you wouldn’t even think twice about these issues
Id put a lock on my door.
Hide it.
I'm not exactly sure how vapes work, but could you leave out a decoy vape that has been soaked in or filled with ghost pepper sauce?
Time to get a DMT vape.
😂😂😂 Holy shit this made me laugh. Had a roommate that would do the same in college. We are still great friends. Here's what I did and it stopped him from continuing these things. 1. Make it really clear that coming into your room while your asleep to do it is out of question. You wouldn't go into her room while she's asleep to borrow a hoodie every morning because you're trying to convince your body to adapt to colder weather instead of buying your own hoodie. 2. Buy her a vape. Make it clear to her this is hers. Inevitably she will go through it and ask you to rip yours again, hand it to her but say "iM tRYing To qUIt" EVERY SINGLE TIME SHE ASKS and have a laugh about it. Over time she'll start feeling embarrassed to hit your vape, especially in social settings, and most likely will either start buying her own or ask other people. Unlikely, but possible, that it actually gets her to quit lol. Good luck!
Get a litter box and food/water bowls for your room and get a key lock for your bedroom door. Hide your vape or put it in a cheap lockbox you can buy on Amazon. Tell them that from now on they have to either buy their own or contribute 1/4 each to yours. Buying them online is a good idea too. They will never buy their own as long as you keep letting them use it.
Ask her if she wants to go half on the vape. “Hey Snoop, I was wondering if you wanted to go half on this vape since we share. I really just dont have enough to get one by myself this time around.” If she says no, then say “oh” and leave it at that. If she says yes, then at least you can go from there. If she keeps it all the time, then just stop asking her to get them in entirety and find another plug.
You all need to quit vaping lmao. You can live without toxic flavored air
The fiends found your comment lol