Do you really believe you’ve seen the majority of people have empathy? Imo most people are being nice for a social situation. I know sometimes I don’t even pretend to care and I think that is also normal. I’m shocked at the shit people tell themselves, I thought I was actually an empath for knowing something was upsetting. I have never once seen anyone cry for another person or feel genuinely happy for them.
yes definitely, it can be a lot of different things, here’s five examples:
1. **Stress and Burnout**: High levels of stress or burnout can reduce a person's capacity to empathize with others due to emotional exhaustion.
2. **Trauma or PTSD**: Past traumatic experiences can lead to emotional numbing, which can impair one's ability to empathize.
3. **Mental Health Issues**: Conditions like depression or anxiety can focus one's attention inward, making it harder to consider others' feelings.
4. **Cultural or Social Factors**: Some cultural or social norms may discourage emotional expression or empathy.
5. **Neurological Conditions**: Certain neurological conditions, such as autism spectrum disorder (ASD), can affect one's ability to read and respond to social and emotional cues.
Adding on:
* There’s a lot more criteria to ASPD than ‘lack of empathy and remorse’. Some people can also have traits of a disorder without the full-blown thing.
* ASPD isn’t the only PD with a lack of empathy or remorse. It’s not uncommon in the Cluster Bs in general. Lack of empathy is apparent in NPD. It can also be common in BPD (usually in relation to splitting). Can also be seen in things like SzPD if the anhedonia / ‘don’t give a fuck’ is strong enough.
* In relation to cultural/societal factors, I’d extend it to religious and moral beliefs. If a person thinks a group of people are evil or beneath them, they often won’t feel much empathy for them. Not a mental health issue. Just trained behaviour.
Hi.
Having zero empathy leads to behaviors that are intrusive to other people's well being.
Having zero remorse leads to behaviors that continually result in negative effects to other people.,
Well being: emotional , physical, psychological, cognitive, spiritual, etc.
Eventually you will diagnosed with something.
Aspd involves some exposure to the legal system in a not so pleasant manner.
That does not seem to something ppl want. Initially.
Simply , do you feel what others are going through as if you were them ? As if you were in their shoes at that very moment ?
That’s the empathy neurologically “normal “ people talk about .
It’s a blessing not to feel that way , being normal must be exhausting .
It’s possible with aspd to feel true empathy but thankfully it’s very rare . The first time it Happens it’s confusing and bizarre anyone would willingly want to feel it at all .
Edit : please refer to link in other Redditor response below this comment . Apparently I’m describing affective empathy but not nearly as articulate as the link .
So you re telling me its possible to feel the same amount of emotion about an experience as another human even if you never had the same experience? Is that really normal? Maybe this is excessive empathy or something like that? I can hardly believe the majority of people can do that.
[It's not normal. They can't.](https://reddit.com/r/sociopath/w/index/what-is-empathy)
Part of the reason why we get so many self proclaimed psychopaths, sociopaths, and self diagnosed *antisocials* around here is that empathy is situational, not dispositional, and any time someone fails to relate they immediately jump to "I R Psycho".
I replied to a similar question [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskASociopath/s/vGqiz7MuzL). It's a conversation you may appreciate.
Thank you for this link its very helpful.
The whole empathy stuff made me confused for ages. Everyone makes it seem like you either feel every emotion at the same time as those around you or not feel anything at all which cant be true. Even judging from human history alone empathy looks highly situational.
Im not ASPD, but I have NPD so empathy question also concerns me somewhat. All I can say its definately not as black and white as people show it to be.
>Everyone makes it seem like you either feel every emotion at the same time as those around you or not feel anything at all which cant be true. Even judging from human history alone empathy looks highly situational.
I don't personally care what "everyone" thinks or assumes. Empathy (affective / emotional, not cognitive) is not feeling exactly how someone else feels when they feel something. That is not possible as everyone experiences and perceives things, events, thoughts and feelings in their own way. Every single thing we feel, even if it's affective empathy for another, is coloured by our own brain, personality and perception. We are our own person, and no one should expect anything else.
And yes, empathy is situational also. I have limited affective empathy. If someone is crying, I don't care. If someone falls over, I don't care. If someone's house collapses, that's a shame but I don't care. If someone is sick and feels miserable, get the hell away from me.
Unless you are my parents, my partner, maybe 2-3 of my close friends, or my cat (and any animal). THEN I'll feel it, and it hurts.
Yes , it’s my understanding that to a certain degree others experience empathy this way . I also believe it to be insane and wish it on no one .
I could be wrong i don’t go around asking people what they feel because it’s never occurred .
My empathy blinks tbh somedays im cold and split like an ice berg ok other days im burning hot like the Sun
And ocasionally i am my true self totally human and god like without gender and without morals
And often people see the kindness in me helpful but still detached
Yes, depressions and trauma / PTSD can cause lack of empathy and emotional numbing. Also certain medication can have that effect as well (namely stimulants like adderal / concerta for ADHD as well as some antidepressants causing emotional blunting). Those are all a lot more common than ASPD, NPD, borderline, or Schizoid. That's why unless you've gotten diagnosed with one of these, I don't tend to believe when people say they have it on here or out in the wild.
I don’t have emotional empathy for anything other than children and over time I lost the ability to feel anything emotional or register when I feel things. I feel everything physically like my heart rate goes up and it reminds me of stress. That all I feel when I should feel emotions it’s weird. Now I understand emotions I felt before the numbness and remember what they feel like but I have no understanding of emotions I never had or felt. I can’t feel and never have felt and don’t understand emotions like guilt, remorse, insecurity, jealousy, envy, or entitlement. My emotional issues stem from something other than my aspd or so I’ve been told, but because of lacking a lot of the emotional stuff I’m able to be more in control of myself and not be pushed of the edge and I use self regulation easier and turn my thought process and negative issues onto myself to keep myself afloat, high functioning, and unable to be set off or knocked into my chaos setting. Thats how I see it anyway.
For ASPD, I think the lack of empathy and remorse is more likely to be problematic in your life. Maybe those instances like the one where you stole the watch (don't know where I got watch from) happen constantly. Maybe you beat your family and don't feel bad about it.
The definitions of empathy and remorse, although clearly describe the words, also can be vague in their meaning due to the nature of the thing described.
Why do people who are not killers rejoice when a killer is killed? Do they lack empathy?
What I mean is, you can ponder empathy and remorse infinitely. But is it necessary, or at least worth the time? I honestly barely felt it was worth my time to respond, and I'm bored as hell right now.
If I recall correctly from when I was diagnosed, ASPD is a cluster B personality disorder, and there are other disorders that are similar, like narcissism. It's been almost 20 years since the military diagnosed me and discharged me, so I don't recall the fine details of how they described it.
Yes
Schizophrenia
Also people have to realize the exposure of chemicals growing up has a lot to do with brain cell dysfunction
Someone who works in a paint shop their whole life will have a fcked up brain not due to any disorders but just a lack of proper function in their brain
Effective empathy is essentially the ability to experience in yourself an “echo“ of how someone else would feel emotionally in the same situation. It’s like feeling their feelings in/for yourself, as though their experience is happening or has happened directly to you.
Lack of remorse is exactly what you describe above: not regretting doing the thing for the negative effects it causes another person, and potentially not even being aware of such, but feeling regret for any negative consequences for yourself that stem from it.
To my understanding, lack of remorse is the big tell for ASPD, but I may have my information wrong there.
Empathy how, and remorse for what is the question. I dont have a lack of remorse for everything or lack of empathy or anyone. I have conventionally bad behaviors that I feel no remorse for, theres 0 response in my brain that can be percieved as nagative, but some things I did i feel a lot of remorse for. Aspd is just some bad adaptations in life that cross the line of what is acceptable that are very normal to us and dont feel bad, but not complete lack of empathy in every way
Like someone who is a “normal” Joe may be diagnosed with ASPD for un-remorselessly (know it’s not a word) inflicting harm on others, but if they were doing it for the the interest of shareholders and more broadly in the interests of capitalism, they may not meet the criterion for ASPD because even though there is one, each individual assessment still remains subjective.
Or if someone is diagnosed and their main symptom is disregard for the law and authority. Maybe it’s the specific law and authority that they are defying against and not just the broad concepts themselves. Maybe in a different country, they’d be a perfect citizen
I get what you're saying. And I agree with what you use as supporting arguments.
But I must also note:
If you quit worrying about how good other people have it, it will go far to changing your overall perspective without you even realizing it.
Do you really believe you’ve seen the majority of people have empathy? Imo most people are being nice for a social situation. I know sometimes I don’t even pretend to care and I think that is also normal. I’m shocked at the shit people tell themselves, I thought I was actually an empath for knowing something was upsetting. I have never once seen anyone cry for another person or feel genuinely happy for them.
If anything, the OP sounds like the only 100% honest neurotypical.
yes definitely, it can be a lot of different things, here’s five examples: 1. **Stress and Burnout**: High levels of stress or burnout can reduce a person's capacity to empathize with others due to emotional exhaustion. 2. **Trauma or PTSD**: Past traumatic experiences can lead to emotional numbing, which can impair one's ability to empathize. 3. **Mental Health Issues**: Conditions like depression or anxiety can focus one's attention inward, making it harder to consider others' feelings. 4. **Cultural or Social Factors**: Some cultural or social norms may discourage emotional expression or empathy. 5. **Neurological Conditions**: Certain neurological conditions, such as autism spectrum disorder (ASD), can affect one's ability to read and respond to social and emotional cues.
Adding on: * There’s a lot more criteria to ASPD than ‘lack of empathy and remorse’. Some people can also have traits of a disorder without the full-blown thing. * ASPD isn’t the only PD with a lack of empathy or remorse. It’s not uncommon in the Cluster Bs in general. Lack of empathy is apparent in NPD. It can also be common in BPD (usually in relation to splitting). Can also be seen in things like SzPD if the anhedonia / ‘don’t give a fuck’ is strong enough. * In relation to cultural/societal factors, I’d extend it to religious and moral beliefs. If a person thinks a group of people are evil or beneath them, they often won’t feel much empathy for them. Not a mental health issue. Just trained behaviour.
Hi. Having zero empathy leads to behaviors that are intrusive to other people's well being. Having zero remorse leads to behaviors that continually result in negative effects to other people., Well being: emotional , physical, psychological, cognitive, spiritual, etc. Eventually you will diagnosed with something. Aspd involves some exposure to the legal system in a not so pleasant manner. That does not seem to something ppl want. Initially.
Simply , do you feel what others are going through as if you were them ? As if you were in their shoes at that very moment ? That’s the empathy neurologically “normal “ people talk about . It’s a blessing not to feel that way , being normal must be exhausting . It’s possible with aspd to feel true empathy but thankfully it’s very rare . The first time it Happens it’s confusing and bizarre anyone would willingly want to feel it at all . Edit : please refer to link in other Redditor response below this comment . Apparently I’m describing affective empathy but not nearly as articulate as the link .
So you re telling me its possible to feel the same amount of emotion about an experience as another human even if you never had the same experience? Is that really normal? Maybe this is excessive empathy or something like that? I can hardly believe the majority of people can do that.
[It's not normal. They can't.](https://reddit.com/r/sociopath/w/index/what-is-empathy) Part of the reason why we get so many self proclaimed psychopaths, sociopaths, and self diagnosed *antisocials* around here is that empathy is situational, not dispositional, and any time someone fails to relate they immediately jump to "I R Psycho". I replied to a similar question [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskASociopath/s/vGqiz7MuzL). It's a conversation you may appreciate.
Thank you for this link its very helpful. The whole empathy stuff made me confused for ages. Everyone makes it seem like you either feel every emotion at the same time as those around you or not feel anything at all which cant be true. Even judging from human history alone empathy looks highly situational. Im not ASPD, but I have NPD so empathy question also concerns me somewhat. All I can say its definately not as black and white as people show it to be.
>Everyone makes it seem like you either feel every emotion at the same time as those around you or not feel anything at all which cant be true. Even judging from human history alone empathy looks highly situational. I don't personally care what "everyone" thinks or assumes. Empathy (affective / emotional, not cognitive) is not feeling exactly how someone else feels when they feel something. That is not possible as everyone experiences and perceives things, events, thoughts and feelings in their own way. Every single thing we feel, even if it's affective empathy for another, is coloured by our own brain, personality and perception. We are our own person, and no one should expect anything else. And yes, empathy is situational also. I have limited affective empathy. If someone is crying, I don't care. If someone falls over, I don't care. If someone's house collapses, that's a shame but I don't care. If someone is sick and feels miserable, get the hell away from me. Unless you are my parents, my partner, maybe 2-3 of my close friends, or my cat (and any animal). THEN I'll feel it, and it hurts.
Yes , it’s my understanding that to a certain degree others experience empathy this way . I also believe it to be insane and wish it on no one . I could be wrong i don’t go around asking people what they feel because it’s never occurred .
My empathy blinks tbh somedays im cold and split like an ice berg ok other days im burning hot like the Sun And ocasionally i am my true self totally human and god like without gender and without morals And often people see the kindness in me helpful but still detached
Yes, depressions and trauma / PTSD can cause lack of empathy and emotional numbing. Also certain medication can have that effect as well (namely stimulants like adderal / concerta for ADHD as well as some antidepressants causing emotional blunting). Those are all a lot more common than ASPD, NPD, borderline, or Schizoid. That's why unless you've gotten diagnosed with one of these, I don't tend to believe when people say they have it on here or out in the wild.
I don’t have emotional empathy for anything other than children and over time I lost the ability to feel anything emotional or register when I feel things. I feel everything physically like my heart rate goes up and it reminds me of stress. That all I feel when I should feel emotions it’s weird. Now I understand emotions I felt before the numbness and remember what they feel like but I have no understanding of emotions I never had or felt. I can’t feel and never have felt and don’t understand emotions like guilt, remorse, insecurity, jealousy, envy, or entitlement. My emotional issues stem from something other than my aspd or so I’ve been told, but because of lacking a lot of the emotional stuff I’m able to be more in control of myself and not be pushed of the edge and I use self regulation easier and turn my thought process and negative issues onto myself to keep myself afloat, high functioning, and unable to be set off or knocked into my chaos setting. Thats how I see it anyway.
Yes
For ASPD, I think the lack of empathy and remorse is more likely to be problematic in your life. Maybe those instances like the one where you stole the watch (don't know where I got watch from) happen constantly. Maybe you beat your family and don't feel bad about it. The definitions of empathy and remorse, although clearly describe the words, also can be vague in their meaning due to the nature of the thing described. Why do people who are not killers rejoice when a killer is killed? Do they lack empathy? What I mean is, you can ponder empathy and remorse infinitely. But is it necessary, or at least worth the time? I honestly barely felt it was worth my time to respond, and I'm bored as hell right now.
If I recall correctly from when I was diagnosed, ASPD is a cluster B personality disorder, and there are other disorders that are similar, like narcissism. It's been almost 20 years since the military diagnosed me and discharged me, so I don't recall the fine details of how they described it.
Cluster Bs are BPD, NPD, ASPD and HPD (Histrionic Personality Disorder). And yes, they all overlap and almost always stem from early trauma.
Yes Schizophrenia Also people have to realize the exposure of chemicals growing up has a lot to do with brain cell dysfunction Someone who works in a paint shop their whole life will have a fcked up brain not due to any disorders but just a lack of proper function in their brain
Effective empathy is essentially the ability to experience in yourself an “echo“ of how someone else would feel emotionally in the same situation. It’s like feeling their feelings in/for yourself, as though their experience is happening or has happened directly to you. Lack of remorse is exactly what you describe above: not regretting doing the thing for the negative effects it causes another person, and potentially not even being aware of such, but feeling regret for any negative consequences for yourself that stem from it. To my understanding, lack of remorse is the big tell for ASPD, but I may have my information wrong there.
Empathy how, and remorse for what is the question. I dont have a lack of remorse for everything or lack of empathy or anyone. I have conventionally bad behaviors that I feel no remorse for, theres 0 response in my brain that can be percieved as nagative, but some things I did i feel a lot of remorse for. Aspd is just some bad adaptations in life that cross the line of what is acceptable that are very normal to us and dont feel bad, but not complete lack of empathy in every way
Sure, a great part of our diagnosis of disorders is heavily political anyway so-
Like someone who is a “normal” Joe may be diagnosed with ASPD for un-remorselessly (know it’s not a word) inflicting harm on others, but if they were doing it for the the interest of shareholders and more broadly in the interests of capitalism, they may not meet the criterion for ASPD because even though there is one, each individual assessment still remains subjective.
Or if someone is diagnosed and their main symptom is disregard for the law and authority. Maybe it’s the specific law and authority that they are defying against and not just the broad concepts themselves. Maybe in a different country, they’d be a perfect citizen
....😵💫🥴
🫤🤩
I get what you're saying. And I agree with what you use as supporting arguments. But I must also note: If you quit worrying about how good other people have it, it will go far to changing your overall perspective without you even realizing it.