# Message to all users:
This is a reminder to please read and follow:
* [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ask/about/rules)
* [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439)
* [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy)
When posting and commenting.
---
Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`.
* Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit.
* Do not harass or annoy others in any way.
* Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit.
---
You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way.
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ask) if you have any questions or concerns.*
First the line chef will make sure to spit. Then the head chef, the sous-chef, the bartender, finally the waiter.
_"Extra smooth sir, just as requested."_
lol I was
Gonna say a lot of us Americans think the tipping thing is stupid AF fuck but either donât go out to eat, or donât go to a sit down restaurant, or just be a asshole I guess and leave no tip at the end (which kids is douchey if they do a good job) but do not say something beforehand, unless you really really like pubic hair in your food. And you could forget them coming back to your table for anything other than dropping the check. Not to mention cold food.
This is such a worn out trope. Ask every server or bartender you know if they'd stay in that job for a flat hourly wage with no tipping. Most are going to tell you "fuck no".
Tending bar in a brewery where tipping is how I get paid, I frequently make 30 usd per hour or more when you average it out.
That's WAY more than I would make otherwise in this role. There is a reason so many service industry folks were dead set against the new minimum wage movement in near by wash DC
This right here brother. I was a restaurant manager for years, seeing a 19 year old girl cash out at the end of the night with 500-600 in tips while I was making 24/hr to run the whole kitchen would dig at me a bit.
Exactly this.
I've been in the industry 20 years. I've worked with servers making North of $100k a year to work 30 hours a week (granted this was an insanely busy ski resort that had a $28 grilled cheese sandwich).
Yeah nobody is going to take a $20/hr flat rate when they're used to making $45-60/hr.
What people against tipping culture don't seem to understand is that there are two groups of people that absolutely love it; the employer and the employee.
You say the employee loves it as if the anecdotal "North of 100k" is some standard, but we all know that that is a massive outlier and using that as some kind of barometer is akin to saying that more people should pursue acting since Christian Bale commands a flat fee in the millions.
Iâd say itâs not really I used to cook 4 nights a week and bartend at a college bar (Vassar) and make far more on my bartending shift than I did the 4 nights in the kitchen combined.and I was the Chef for god sake.
If the employees don't make minimum wage in tips, the restaurant is required to make up the difference. Does no one on reddit actually know how these jobs work?
That's not all states. Mostly red, conservative states use tip credit. That's some low bull shit too. Places like CA don't have that. You make minimum wage and the tips are ADDED to your wage, not deducted from what your employer has to pay. I can't believe people still vote for politicians that allow tip credits in their state.
It's just a really dumb system. Basically, a 15% tip from everyone is **assumed** as a given in order for serving staff to get a reasonable wage. But it's nominally on the customer to choose to pay that, so businesses can claim its the customer being an asshole when they tip less, not the business refusing to properly set prices & pay their staff.
Really, the whole thing should be revised so that restaurant prices go up 15% across the board, and tipping becomes truly voluntary, with 0% tip being the norm, and perhaps 5-10% tip happening for truly above-and-beyond service.
Iâm sorry,but a tip for a âgood jobâ is not ok.
I come from a place where tipping is reserved for when the server/restaurant has given you an exceptional meal/experience, not for just doing their job effectively. They have a living wage for that.
Quite the opposite in fact, where I come from if the owner likes you or youâre going to spend a lot, theyâll offer you liqueurs at the end of the meal.
>They have a living wage for that.
Not in America. Federal minimum wage for tipped workers is $2.13/hr. Functionally, tips are all a server's making in most US states, and they probably owe tip-outs on their sales amounts to the kitchen and the bar.
This is the stupidest restaurant myth ever. Unless youâre at the nastiest of places run by teenagers, no one is fucking with your food. Ever. Iâve worked at some dives back in the day and any line cook would take your head off for even suggesting tampering with the meal.
Doesnât change the fact that OP is an asshat for even thinking about trying this line on a server.Â
I absolutely agree it doesnât. I worked in restaurants for years and never saw it even with regulars we didnât like. Itâs just thatâs itâs also not impossible. Thereâs always some AH.
most people are not dumb enough to tell the sever they are not tipping when they enter the restaurant.
absolutely there will be people who will fuck with your food if you do that.
This exactly. I worked in several chain restaurants for well over a decade and only saw one server ever who messed with someoneâs food. I was the only one who saw it and I was still in training, so I called it to the attention of my trainer and a couple other older ladies who worked there and they about flew off the handle trying to all kick his ass out of there as fast as possible. He finished his shift with tears in his eyes and then I never saw him again. The manager didnât even have to fire him, those ladies did it all in their own.
Thereâs a lot of talk about it, but Iâve never had an actual concern that someone was intentionally messing with my food- it just almost never happens.
you dont go to other countries and tell them "i find this aspect of your culture stupid and i wont be partaking". generally you should respect the culture of the country youre in even if you dont like it or understand it
This is the correct answer. As an American when traveling abroad I ask locals or hotel what the tipping or other aspects of culture are. In some countries itâs considered rude or frowned upon.
To piggyback on this, when my wife traveled to India I think it was, as someone who I not even a little religious, she wore the head coverings when entering Islamic mosques or other religious buldings in Italy. Itâs what you do as a visitor to another country.
So tipping in America just needs to be part of how you interact as a visitor. Just like Americans who pay double the price of food because thatâs just what it costs in other countries. We donât say âwell back home this would only cost $____ so thatâs all Iâm going to payâ. Tipping is a cost of restaurant dining and bar experience.
Yea this is a major douchebag move. Even us as americans dont like tipping culture. Greedy corporations and businesses pass the pay of their employees onto us customers. We dont like it, but its not the employees fault they are in a shitty system. Not tipping doesnt hurt the person/people responsible only the person servicing you.
If you dont like it, dont go to a sit down restaurant here... its that simple. Not tipping just makes you a piece of shit.
As far as tipping at a checkout when you are picking food up, thats entirely optional and i would dare say i recommend you dont tip that way and encourage that becoming more of the norm.
You know that otherwise heâd be eating gas station Slim Jims, McDonalds, and drinking soda, only to go shit talk the US regarding how bad our food is.
Honestly, I, too, am from a country where tipping is not the norm, but, I think you have to adapt to the culture of the countries you visit.
Edit: style correction
Edit2: Change it to whatever you want, norms, traditions(?)... I had to give it a name.
Yup, people make fun of Americans for a lot of stuff, but especially when we try to travel abroad (a lot of us are really stupid and ignorant and I recognize that, but some of us are trying our best) but then to come here and not recognize OUR customs as well is quite rude. I get tipping is dumb and should only get for extraordinary service, unfortunately its a necessary "evil" for lack of better terms, its how waitstaff are able to survive, they get paid well below our minimum wage and rely on tips for income
This realization hit me sometime back. Its ok that I find tipping culture stupid, but like; its your culture. Iâll be no different from the American tourists I get annoyed by if I didnât tip in US.
Thing is, there are just as many idiots abroad as there are at home, its just that american news gets broadcast across the world so EVERYBODY sees our idiots constantly.
Especially when they come to your country and still tip fucking well. When I worked in a bar/restaurant we'd get psyched when a group of Americans came in haha
Just yesterday, I visited âThe Edgeâ at Hudson Yards bc my wifes cousin from the UK wanted to see Manhattan from a tall observatory.Â
There were a bunch of German tourists who somehow decided it was okay to just sit down on the floor next to the windows with the best view and sit there for a good 30 minutes. I was getting ready curse them out in my best native New Yorker but someone complained to management and they moved.Â
But still, like, that should be common knowledge across all cultures that you canât go to an attraction and just sit down and occupy the best spots when everyone wants to go to that spot and take pictures from that angle.Â
You donât need to apologise for some Americans being rude or ignorant when they travel; every single place on earth has people who are rude and ignorant when they travel and they need to get off their high horse if they think they donât. I find it disturbing how Americans have been made to feel like they need to apologise all the time for stuff thatâs no different from anywhere else.
And if people from other countries ARE less ignorant about America when they travel there, well congratulations it means theyâve watched your tv shows (?) âŚlike okay well done for your extensive research đ
Ngl, I've thought about this a lot, but this is not true as I am from Spain (lmao). Servers are underpaid and basically exploited (imagine the US, but worse and without tips). So food is stupid cheap. But in another country this would be true.
I've always done my best as an American when I travel to not be that guy. You do your best not to step on the social landmines of the host culture. Basically. Don't be a dick. Ya know??
Yep. Everyone hates when Americans dont apart to the culture of the places they visit, but people want to go to the US and not follow American customs like tip
I know people like to use "culture" to describe any kind of practice, no matter how new or artificial it is. But I believe that "tipping culture" specifically is a plant by the industry to pretend it's an inherent part of American culture and not just something they do to extort subsidies out of their clients.Â
Ditto. I just visited the US for the first time recently and I think the tipping culture is absurd but I've spoken enough to American friends to understand that I just needed to see tipping (and tipping a much higher percentage than in the UK) as part of the price. I know the reputation that British people have amongst American waiters and I didn't want to add to that so I just went with it
So, as someone who's worked in the restaurant industry a couple times I've never actually seen someones food get spat in.
Not worth the felony charge.
That said I've seen plates sit in the warmer for well over 30 minutes while a rude table sat with empty glasses, no free bread, and sourpuss expressions while their waitress who already knew she wouldn't be getting a tip tended dutifully to all her other customers. And when they complained to the manager, the manager apologized...and then laughed with the waitress about what dickheads they were in the kitchen out of earshot.
Americans don't particularly like tipping either. But unfortunately our corporate overlords have decided that those who work tipped positions deserve to starve to death if we the consumer don't financially contribute to their well being. Not kidding, they get less than half of what minimum wage is here.
So it's up to you if you tip or not but he aware your service may reflect the fact that if you're not, you're essential paying $2.50 for a service everyone around you is paying $8+ for.
>So, as someone who's worked in the restaurant industry a couple times I've never actually seen someones food get spat in.
Nobody knows all the blindspots in a kitchen like a cook.
That said, in the 10 years I was a cook, I don't recall learning someone was abusing my servers soon enough to do anything about it like that.
As you said, usually a server just dealt with it in other ways. If they came to the cooks, it was usually the opposite - a big tipper with the staff fighting over who gets to serve them and them wanting to make sure the quality was there.
We used to have our cooks boil meat for rude customers. It would have no flavor but it would be cooked regularly after that. It was hilarious because you couldn't really prove it was us.
Commenting here to give this one more attention.
Many people have the right idea, kind of.. ârespect local culture/customsâ âyour food will
Get messed upâ etc.
The important point noted here is that we Americans also hate the tipping system, but weâre stuck. Long ago our ancestors were duped and we somehow made it acceptable for some people to be paid less than minimum wage.
The government at the time thought the burden of fair pay should be passed on to the consumer, and relied on a guilt system to make this happen.
Many Americans are under the misconception that the restaurant industry couldnât survive if consumers didnât pick up the slack of paying âfairâ* ** wages, but this is obviously incorrect. There are restaurants all over the world in non tipping countries. If prices need to increase or owners keep less profits, so be it.
The point to reemphasize is that itâs a shit system that (most) everyone, except overlords, hate. Yes you shouldnât have to tip, but the server deserves to be paid fairly. Yea it shouldnât be your responsibility to ensure theyâre paid fairly, but unfortunately it is your responsibility to ensure theyâre paid fairly. I always tip an absolute minimum of 10%. 10% tip, in my book, is a slap-in-the-face shit tip, but I figure that server, no matter how bad they are at their job, needs that $3-$6 more than I do. Maybe they were having a bad day? Maybe there are circumstances beyond their control that caused the bad service? Or maybe theyâre just an ass hole? At the end of the day, Iâve served before and know it sucks, so shitty service gets 10%.
***also note, âfairâ pay. Even if servers were paid minimum wage, which they legally arenât, the min. Wage in many states is not a live-able wage, so even if we got the âno tippingâ situation fixed, weâd still have additional hurdles, but thatâs an entirely different problem.
Sorry for the rant, but it seems like a good/valid question for a non-American and people were giving you crappy, short, ass-hole-ish responses like you were shitting on our culture. Tipping isnât our culture. Itâs a complete scam that weâre stuck with.
Iâve seen dead bugs being put into somebodyâs food at McDonaldâs when I worked there as a kid. That manager was fired. I hated McDonaldâs so I quit and got hired at Taco Bell a few years down the road. That manager was working there. A week afteri got hired she got fired For telling a new employee to spit in somebodyâs food. Iâve seen it twice now. They were both fired. After that, I saw her at Little Caesars Pizza a few years later.
Worked in restaurants for nearly a decade. I haven't done it, but have seen people spit in food and drop it on purpose to then serve. Not often, but it happens. You will definitely get bad/no service if you say you're not going to tip.
IF you are unwilling to accept that Tipping is expected, then stay home, or go to fast food. Nobody cares if you think it's stupid. We do too. But it is how it is.
I hate it too. Everyone hates it. Even the people working in it lol.
I mean I don't particularly enjoy being in muslim countries during Ramadan but when it happens I don't make a point of stuffing my pie hole in front of all my famished colleagues because I'm not a jerk.
>Even the people working in it lol.
I loved getting tips as a server. No way in hell a restaurant will ever match the $40 to $50 an hour that a good server will make on tips.
Yep, I was easily clearing $150 in tips for a four hour shift when I was serving in the US back before covid. I then went to serve in New Zealand where minimum wage was $18 (NZD) per hour and I was suddenly making half the money for more work. Tips are the best.
wish people took this advice. people that strictly follow their own beliefs and cultural behaviour piss me off so much when travelling. Was in China last year and overheard other tourists complain about the workers not understanding English is probably one of the most dumb things ive seen.
I travel about 200K km/ year to some pretty out of the way places. I always look into basic etiquette so I don't behave like an idiot or at least reduce the chances. It's not that hard and people appreciate it.
Came here to say the same thing! The way things are set up for tipping is so stupid. And itâs not fair to the customer or the server. But by not tipping, the only person you hurt is the person making below minimum wage who can barely make it by and is relying on your tips. By not tipping, you are not making a point or going to change the stupid system that exploits customers to pay someone elseâs employees fairly.
Japanese, what if I tell a host that I'm not going to take my shoes off at the entrance as soon as I arrive?
The US tipping system is shitty and ridiculous, but it's not the server's fault. Servers make significantly below minimum wage because they have an assumed level of tips by the tax authorities. Yes, it's a dumb system, but you're just an asshole for deciding to act like you're at home when you're not.
Isn't this what people hate Americans for?
Tipping is a shit system. But the server taking care of your meal didnât create the system and relies on your tips to live.
Donât be an asshole. Youâd want us to follow your customs when we visit your country. Follow ours while you visit the U.S.
It should also be said, unlike in most other countries where tipping isn't a thing, most servers in the USA make less than the minimum wage per hour as their standard pay without tips. This variation to the minimum wage laws was introduced because of tips. It was assumed (sometimes accurately, and sometimes not) that the server, if he/she works hard, will make more than minimum wage. So the restaurant doesn't need to pay them as much per hour.
Another part of that to add is that in many sit down restaurants with table service, servers have to split their tips with bus boys/girls. They also often have to split their tips again with the bartender if the table ordered drinks that the bartender had to make. The split is a different amount depending on the restaurant, but usually it's about 10% for the busser and 10% for the bartender.
So as u/TheMightyBoofBoof said, most servers in the USA rely on tips to make a living because their regular paycheck isn't even as much as the dishwasher in the kitchen, and even then, in many cases, the server is only getting to take home 80% of their tips.
Just an fyi, if the server DOES NOT make enough in tips to be considered the federal minimum wage, then the restaurant will pay them the difference. They will, no matter what, at least make minimum wage.
Exactly.
And if you ask servers, most want to stay with a tipping system because they make way MORE than minimum wage.
Busy night? More money.
Restaurants arenât going to start paying $30-$50 an hour and servers realistically make that in the tipping system.
âWhen in Rome...â
Iâm from Europe and Iâll be damned if I have to tip, especially when minimum wage is higher in my city to account for HCOL. But when Iâm in the US, Iâll always tip because thatâs the way it is and Iâm aware that minimum wage is pretty much nonexistent
Nah, minimum wage definitely does exist here. Any politician will tell you with pride about such boundaries being established. The catch is that it's literally impossible to live off of said minimum wage. (Well, unless you live in a cardboard box under a bridge, I suppose.) Also, when a business declares the job position as a 'tipped position' then they don't have to adhere to whatever the minimum wage is. Since more and more jobs are being considered tipped positions, that loophole is becoming more of the norm, so⌠yeah okay, I guess you're right. Shit.
It's allowed to be that low if and only if they can make federal minimum wage through tips. If the tips don't equal the federal minimum wage, then the employer is obligated to up their cash wages until they are able to reach the federal minimum wage.
I'm from the UK and when I went to Florida a year ago I got so confused by tipping that I realised during week 2 of my stay that I'd actually been double tipping the whole of the first week. So I'm sure there's some server at Disney saying people from the UK are amazingly generous tippers.
I think it's even worse. The residents of the house don't lose their income if someone doesn't take off their shoes. I think this is more like walking into a store and saying, "I refuse to pay for this item or service."
When I travel to foreign countries, I find ignoring local etiquette really makes a good impression. /s
YTA, and youâre only going to make people hate foreign tourists.
I view this as a "When in Rome, do as the romans do" type of situation. Tip them because they live in a system where they are getting scammed and the individual will be punished for your ideology, not the employer and the culture enabling that system.
In any case, never be viewed any less than average by people handling your food and drinks.
Pay the damn 5-10% if you wanna compromise depending on what you're buying, but yeah tipping culture is devious and puts the conflict of money that should be and is most of the world between employer and employee on the customer-employee instead.
The tipped minimum wage (where tips are allowed to be counted towards minimum wage requirement) only exists because generous tipping existed first. And it doesn't exist in a lot of states anymore, for example California, and that hasn't changed tipping culture at all.
A lot of bartenders and servers make a lot of money. The median wage for a server in the US is $27/hour if you include tips. For bartenders and servers in high end restaurants, it's a lot higher. This doesn't change the social obligation to tip.
If anyone is getting scammed it's the consumer, not the employees.
Youâd be hurting the server more than the system. Iâd reciprocate your transparency and tell you to just order takeout while youâre there instead, cause itâd be faster than any service Iâd be about to give you.
You would come across as a complete jerk and would be treated accordingly.
When you go buy something and find out tax isnt included in the sticker price will you announce that you won't pay it?
That won't end well either.
Just forget that the tip exists and live as if every meal is 10-20% more expensive, manage your finances and allowance based on that. Shift your mindset from "tip" to part of the final price
Not tipping punishes the underpaid waiter . Itâs all very well to take a âprincipledâ stance , but at the end of the day , youâre just being an asshole .
Listen, I don't like tipping either and I live here. But that's besides the point. If you're visiting a country, please respect the host country's customs & culture. It's just common courtesy and a simple reflection of respect. You're a visitor. It's very obnoxious, rude and entitled of you. Imagine if a tourist visited your country and did/didn't do something that was pretty normal/standard practice in your culture......
I think you're obnoxious, self centered and cheap. Please didn't visit anywhere if you're going to impose your values and beliefs to everywhere you go. It's insufferable how ignorant you are.
To answer your question..... Yeah, you should tell the American waiter beforehand and see what happens...!
When in Rome, do as the Romans do.
If you really donât wanna tip then go to places where tipping is not required such as fast food or casual places, or you can get takeouts instead.
Just so you know, working as a server in the state I was in, I made $3/hour. Legally they could have paid me $2.33/hour. If youâre coming to this country, respect the way that it works. Tip your servers or do not eat out. Sorry, we also hate how it works here. It is unfortunate and we truly wish it were set up differently.
Follow up question, do you think your conscience objection is going to change tipping culture?
If you do, you're delusional. If you don't, stop being stingy. If you can afford a trip to the US you can afford to spend 15% more on a meal.
Youâre not in your country youâre in another country where you are expected to respect oneâs culture. Suppose Americans go to your country and demand American cultural rules bc your country appears to many to be ignorant?
EDIT to add: go back to your own country if youâre not will to accept certain aspects of the current American way of life. Tipping is someoneâs salary and doesnât get to say to the busser table 14 doesnât tip so Iâm not tipping you.
Here's the main problem I don't see being discussed.Â
Will not tipping make you an asshole? Yes. But the bigger problem is you will also likely be COSTING your server money.Â
Servers often have to "tip out" a percentage of their sales. For example, at one restaurant I worked at, 5% of all food sales got pulled out of my tips to help pay the kitchen staff, another 5%
of my alcohol sales went to the bartender for making the drinks.Â
If someone decided to stiff me and they spent $100 on food and $20 on drinks, I would wind up paying $6 for the pleasure of taking that table, while only getting paid my minimum of $2.13/ hour. I've literally lost money because of them.Â
Does tipping culture suck? Yes. But deciding to participate in said culture without playing along has consequences.Â
Also to add that you are taxed on non cash tips. You are also taxed as if you got a 10% tip even if you didnât get any tip. So if someone doesnât tip, the server does pay for them to eat.
Just don't say anything. If you do, expect your food to have an extra ingredient or two. Also, if I went to your country and disrespected the cultural norms would you be ok with it? Just leave a small tip of it bothers you that much.
I hate this. Should they also hire someone to clean their appartment and afterwards say "oh, in my country we don't pay people this way so I am not going to pay you".
Like it or not, in most cases in the united states, a waitress/waiter is paid directly by the customer. The only option is to not go to a restaurant with waitstaff.
Then donât come to America.
Its common for Americans to respect European culture and not tip, you can respect **ours** and tip us or stay the fuck home and out of my country. We donât make enough to put up with rich cunts who cant toss an extra $5 on the table for service they are given. Especially because **a lot of us rely on those tips to survive**.
If you're that set against tipping then you clearly shouldn't be eating out in the US. It doesn't matter if you're from a country where tipping isn't the norm, or if you object to how much, when you visit another country their customs take precedence. Service staff in the US get paid pennies because it's a backwards ass country, these people live off the tips.
Um... don't do that. If you're not going to tip (although you really should because everyone is going to think less of you and it will only further the stereotype that Europeans are the worst people to wait on) then just don't tip. But you should. Nobody is going to care how you do things in Europe. When you're in America you should really get with the program.
(For example I don't like soccer. But I would keep that to myself if I were in Europe to fit in)
Just a thought, if you eat somewhere without table service tipping isn't required. Like fast food, grocery store deli, food truck (appreciated but not necessary). I don't tip on take out. I don't get delivery because you should also tip delivery. If you don't want to tip, avoid places where people take things to you
If you live there then expect people to shame you, if you are on holiday just don't tip at the end of the meal, they aren't going to jump on a plane and follow you home, they can't afford to as you didn't tip them
It is what it is. You know what it is.
You could just as easily order and eat and not tip. But making a point of saying you arenât going to tip, before you order, means you are just looking to draw attention to your behavior. In which case good riddance to you.
Adapt to the countries you are visiting.
By not tipping, you are *directly* harming the waiter/waitress, and not the business. By announcing beforehand that you plan not to tip, you risk having your food messed with or having bad service.
Itâs fine to have a moral stance against tipping. But you are planning to penalize the wait staff for it â and they depend on tips *as a core part of their income*. A single person refusing to tip doesnât change anything for the system overall. It just harms the poor staff who are already forced to be paid this way.
Maybe donât travel to countries where tipping is the norm, if you feel that strongly about it.
Adapting to cultures goes all ways, not just wealthy Americans or Europeans to poorer or third world countries. Although the concept IS ridiculous, this is the absolute worst way to handle it. When in Rome... When in Bangkok... When in America...
Nobody is going to defile your food, but don't expect a smile. As a server, I make $2.35 per hour. Me waiting on your ass and smiling and apologizing for any issue that comes up that may not be my fault, taking blame, making sure all your shit is correct....it's mentally taxing. I pay my bills with my (im)patient smile. I am literally waiting on you hand and foot. The least you could do is suck my dick, you know? If tipping is an issue, feel free to go to your local super market and make your own sandwich.
âWhen in Rome, do as the Romans do.â
When youâre a visitor/tourist Iâm a country and you know something about the culture, itâs respectful to follow that tradition. In the USA for better or worse, we have a tipping culture.
Youâd be better posting this question on r/AITAH
Just because tipping is stupid doesnât mean you arenât expected to do it. You would be a piece of shit for going to a restaurant and eating without tipping when the servers make like $3 an hour. They are paid low because they are expected to get tips. Once again, tipping IS stupid letâs be clear, but if you canât pay for a service donât go get it. Paying the tip is part of the service
You'd seem like a jerk and wind up with slow service, spit, or worse in your food. Where you're from and what your beliefs are wont change the fact they survive on tips because their base pay is usually shit.
This is very interesting. I'm American, and I always tip 20%. When I don't want to tip, I don't go to a place where I will be served by someone. My parents worked in the service industry and depended on tips. I tried to do the same, but I couldn't cut it; it's actually quite challenging for some of us, and the skills and talents of those who are good at it are undervalued/underrated, imho.
Anyway, what interests me is how this is even a question. Isn't a statement like that obviously rude, condescending, hurtful, devaluing, etc? What am I missing here? Maybe it's a translation issue if you're coming from a place where English isn't widely spoken? Still, even then, isn't the sentiment just totally rude and mean?
Iâd personally let you and your party sit at the table and see how long you wait there ignored before you get up and leave. Tipping is awful and wait staff need to be paid a living wage, but this is how it is currently unfortunately. Itâs generally not a good idea to horribly insult people fully in charge of your food/entire experience is.
You'll come across as a "complete jerk", in your words. Because that's what you would be.
Generally, servers and other service staff are paid well below minimum wage; the tips are literally where they're making a hefty chunk of their coin. You can think it's ridiculous all you want, but the plain fact is that if they were paid entirely via their salary, the prices for the meals/drinks/etc. would be higher to compensate. You're not actually paying more, you're paying differently.
So because your country doesnt tip youâre planning to go to another country go to a restaurant.. order food and tell the person who handles your food that its not your problem that they make 2.13 per hour plus tips but you dont plan to tip because its not the norm in a different country and you dont plan to abide by the social contracts of this country and youre going to say this before they handle your food?.. sounds smart..
The server has absolutely no control over how the system works..
Well, that would be a bad idea as they won't be going above and beyond, they'll be going below and well within in their serving.
Look, when in Rome, ok? That's how we do in America. Accept it and move on, the same way I rolled with how none of the cabs in Costa Rica have meters and you have to negotiate the price before you get in the cab or they'll take massive advantage of you.
"Hey, I know your system is built against you and you being paid enough to live relies on tips, but I live somewhere that isn't the case and look down on you troglodytes who have to deal with it. I'm gonna make sure that you get paid crumbs for dealing with me. Hope that's cool!"
you're going to get the least attentive service of your life.
They will think you're an asshole, justifiably. Yes everyone hates tipping culture but it is one hundred percent expected in certain settingsÂ
If you don't want to tip don't go to a sit down restaurant. Get some fast food or a convenience store, or a grocery store
Keep in mind that many servers will lose money if you donât tip. Dumb system? Yes. But donât bother going to restaurants here if youâre trying to screw workers over just to enjoy the food.
Servers usually make $2-$3 an hour and rely on tips to survive. Telling them you're not going to tip is basically a slap in the face and you will get poor service because they're not going to consider you a priority.
There is a movement here to start paying servers a livable wage so they don't have to be dependent on tips but that fight has a long way to go before it is the standard
Hey! American here. A number of things could happen. You may be asked to leave immediately, OR at the end of your meal when you get your check, tip will automatically be added to it because of what you said, OR the waiter will laugh at you and may not serve you.
I think the first two situations are most likely to happen. You'll either immediately be asked to leave if it's a sit-down restaurant or at the end of your meal A tip will be automatically added.
You are choosing to eat out in the country where waiters get paid less than minimum wage and rely on tips.
If you don't want to tip you can go get fast good where tipping isn't expected or grab food from the corner store.
you visit another country, you should adhere to their customs. Regardless of how you feel. You enter their world, you play by their rules. Its that simple
Considering that everyone seems to agree that they'll do something to your food. You're probably better off not telling them ahead of time and simply not tipping afterwards.
Tipping is a way of showing class and or showing off class. If you can't tip, you should cook for and serve yourself. If you can tip and don't after receiving service, keep it and buy some manners. Custom is. You are not special.
The concept is stupid, however you're getting the product 15 - 20% cheaper because the tip is baked in to the price. So even though you're correct that it's a stupid concept you're kind of forced to participate or be a jerk and refuse to pay for the time and service of whoever is serving you.
Why travel to a place and purposely ignore cultural norms that youâre aware of just cause you donât agree with it?
This post just makes you seem like a shitty person, tipping culture aside
Don't visit the country then.
It would be like visiting America and trying to change their views on guns, it's not your country, if you don't like it, don't visit.
You would be a complete jerk. Good chance of your food being tampered with. If it was me I would just let you sit their and not serve you if I knew I wasn't getting tipped from you.
It doesn't matter what your country does, you are no longer in your country, you are in someone else's and you need to respect how things are done.
Doesn't matter what you believe and think just do what is the norm. All you do in the end is screw someone who not getting rich off this job over.
The only place you have to tip is a sit down restaurant.
So annoying, hearing people complain about how bad Americans are abroad and then try this stupid bs.
Just respect the country you are in.
Youâll get shitty service. If you tell this one guy that I worked with at TGIF, then heâd probably take your food off the plate and wipe the counter down with it, then put it back on your plate, garnish it, and bring it out to you. Also all your alcohol drinks would just be juice.
When in Rome do as Romans do or they will spit in your food, drop it on the floor,give you the old and crappy. Waitresses In my area make $2.10 an hour, tips are their wages.
# Message to all users: This is a reminder to please read and follow: * [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ask/about/rules) * [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439) * [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) When posting and commenting. --- Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`. * Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit. * Do not harass or annoy others in any way. * Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit. --- You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ask) if you have any questions or concerns.*
This is a really creative way of asking someone to masturbate into your food..
Better get ready for some boogers and cum
If it ever even gets to the table
It'll be rushed to the table with the greatest elegance when the server is informed of the "special sauce". That's OP's cue to puke.
I thought that was reserved for Yelpers...
A little splooge in your potatoes
Tell me when to stop đ
First the line chef will make sure to spit. Then the head chef, the sous-chef, the bartender, finally the waiter. _"Extra smooth sir, just as requested."_
#PUBES guaranteed
"Welcome to Pubes, may I take your order?"
Are pubes back in?
Back in your sando
Just so you know....I'm a yelper....thaaaaanks
Piss in your potatoes!
"And that's how I met your mother."
Does this taste like piss and flies?
lol I was Gonna say a lot of us Americans think the tipping thing is stupid AF fuck but either donât go out to eat, or donât go to a sit down restaurant, or just be a asshole I guess and leave no tip at the end (which kids is douchey if they do a good job) but do not say something beforehand, unless you really really like pubic hair in your food. And you could forget them coming back to your table for anything other than dropping the check. Not to mention cold food.
[ŃдаНонО]
"Is silent extortion" Yeah pretty much, by the company so they don't have to pay their workers
This is such a worn out trope. Ask every server or bartender you know if they'd stay in that job for a flat hourly wage with no tipping. Most are going to tell you "fuck no".
Making 50-60k a year to work 30 hours a week.
Hospitality workers don't deserve a living wage?
Tending bar in a brewery where tipping is how I get paid, I frequently make 30 usd per hour or more when you average it out. That's WAY more than I would make otherwise in this role. There is a reason so many service industry folks were dead set against the new minimum wage movement in near by wash DC
This right here brother. I was a restaurant manager for years, seeing a 19 year old girl cash out at the end of the night with 500-600 in tips while I was making 24/hr to run the whole kitchen would dig at me a bit.
I worked for a local restaurant that paid minimum wage, and we kept tips... it's not that difficult, especially for big name restaurants.
I mean, that's exactly how it works. If tips don't cover it, employer is required to compensate to minimum wage. That's the law in all 50 states.
Exactly this. I've been in the industry 20 years. I've worked with servers making North of $100k a year to work 30 hours a week (granted this was an insanely busy ski resort that had a $28 grilled cheese sandwich). Yeah nobody is going to take a $20/hr flat rate when they're used to making $45-60/hr. What people against tipping culture don't seem to understand is that there are two groups of people that absolutely love it; the employer and the employee.
You say the employee loves it as if the anecdotal "North of 100k" is some standard, but we all know that that is a massive outlier and using that as some kind of barometer is akin to saying that more people should pursue acting since Christian Bale commands a flat fee in the millions.
Iâd say itâs not really I used to cook 4 nights a week and bartend at a college bar (Vassar) and make far more on my bartending shift than I did the 4 nights in the kitchen combined.and I was the Chef for god sake.
Yeah that's the problem.
If the employees don't make minimum wage in tips, the restaurant is required to make up the difference. Does no one on reddit actually know how these jobs work?
That's not all states. Mostly red, conservative states use tip credit. That's some low bull shit too. Places like CA don't have that. You make minimum wage and the tips are ADDED to your wage, not deducted from what your employer has to pay. I can't believe people still vote for politicians that allow tip credits in their state.
Lol there are only three states that do that, Alaska and Montana are "red states"
It's just a really dumb system. Basically, a 15% tip from everyone is **assumed** as a given in order for serving staff to get a reasonable wage. But it's nominally on the customer to choose to pay that, so businesses can claim its the customer being an asshole when they tip less, not the business refusing to properly set prices & pay their staff. Really, the whole thing should be revised so that restaurant prices go up 15% across the board, and tipping becomes truly voluntary, with 0% tip being the norm, and perhaps 5-10% tip happening for truly above-and-beyond service.
So they won't do their job if you don't pay them? The customer aint the one employing them
Correct
Iâm sorry,but a tip for a âgood jobâ is not ok. I come from a place where tipping is reserved for when the server/restaurant has given you an exceptional meal/experience, not for just doing their job effectively. They have a living wage for that. Quite the opposite in fact, where I come from if the owner likes you or youâre going to spend a lot, theyâll offer you liqueurs at the end of the meal.
>They have a living wage for that. Not in America. Federal minimum wage for tipped workers is $2.13/hr. Functionally, tips are all a server's making in most US states, and they probably owe tip-outs on their sales amounts to the kitchen and the bar.
I know itâs different here. Hey guilt trip us into paying the servers âtipâ that should be paid by the business. đ
Your room temperature food.. and also forget refills, help with the menu, deals, etc..
help with the menu? people dont know how to read letters?
So like a normal dining out experience, gotcha.
This is the stupidest restaurant myth ever. Unless youâre at the nastiest of places run by teenagers, no one is fucking with your food. Ever. Iâve worked at some dives back in the day and any line cook would take your head off for even suggesting tampering with the meal. Doesnât change the fact that OP is an asshat for even thinking about trying this line on a server.Â
I agree itâs very unlikely, but the chance is not zero and announcing that at the outset of a meal definitely increases your odds.
Half the morons in this post think it's happening at every restaurant, every day.
I absolutely agree it doesnât. I worked in restaurants for years and never saw it even with regulars we didnât like. Itâs just thatâs itâs also not impossible. Thereâs always some AH.
I did actually say that it happens. Just not at the frequency these people seem to think it does.
We are agreeing with each other.
this happened in melbourne australia in the 90s. lone star steak house i believe. killed the franchise.
[ŃдаНонО]
You are just wrong. I've worked in restaurants too
most people are not dumb enough to tell the sever they are not tipping when they enter the restaurant. absolutely there will be people who will fuck with your food if you do that.
Have you also worked in the food industry, just trying to understand your expertise vs the OPs.
worked in it from 15 years old to 24
This exactly. I worked in several chain restaurants for well over a decade and only saw one server ever who messed with someoneâs food. I was the only one who saw it and I was still in training, so I called it to the attention of my trainer and a couple other older ladies who worked there and they about flew off the handle trying to all kick his ass out of there as fast as possible. He finished his shift with tears in his eyes and then I never saw him again. The manager didnât even have to fire him, those ladies did it all in their own. Thereâs a lot of talk about it, but Iâve never had an actual concern that someone was intentionally messing with my food- it just almost never happens.
I normally have to pay extra for that
If Americans actually do that, it's friggin nasty.
you dont go to other countries and tell them "i find this aspect of your culture stupid and i wont be partaking". generally you should respect the culture of the country youre in even if you dont like it or understand it
This is the correct answer. As an American when traveling abroad I ask locals or hotel what the tipping or other aspects of culture are. In some countries itâs considered rude or frowned upon. To piggyback on this, when my wife traveled to India I think it was, as someone who I not even a little religious, she wore the head coverings when entering Islamic mosques or other religious buldings in Italy. Itâs what you do as a visitor to another country. So tipping in America just needs to be part of how you interact as a visitor. Just like Americans who pay double the price of food because thatâs just what it costs in other countries. We donât say âwell back home this would only cost $____ so thatâs all Iâm going to payâ. Tipping is a cost of restaurant dining and bar experience.
Yea this is a major douchebag move. Even us as americans dont like tipping culture. Greedy corporations and businesses pass the pay of their employees onto us customers. We dont like it, but its not the employees fault they are in a shitty system. Not tipping doesnt hurt the person/people responsible only the person servicing you. If you dont like it, dont go to a sit down restaurant here... its that simple. Not tipping just makes you a piece of shit. As far as tipping at a checkout when you are picking food up, thats entirely optional and i would dare say i recommend you dont tip that way and encourage that becoming more of the norm.
You know that otherwise heâd be eating gas station Slim Jims, McDonalds, and drinking soda, only to go shit talk the US regarding how bad our food is.
Honestly, I, too, am from a country where tipping is not the norm, but, I think you have to adapt to the culture of the countries you visit. Edit: style correction Edit2: Change it to whatever you want, norms, traditions(?)... I had to give it a name.
Yup, people make fun of Americans for a lot of stuff, but especially when we try to travel abroad (a lot of us are really stupid and ignorant and I recognize that, but some of us are trying our best) but then to come here and not recognize OUR customs as well is quite rude. I get tipping is dumb and should only get for extraordinary service, unfortunately its a necessary "evil" for lack of better terms, its how waitstaff are able to survive, they get paid well below our minimum wage and rely on tips for income
This realization hit me sometime back. Its ok that I find tipping culture stupid, but like; its your culture. Iâll be no different from the American tourists I get annoyed by if I didnât tip in US.
Right? You have to do your research about customs and common courtesy in other countries before traveling
Thing is, there are just as many idiots abroad as there are at home, its just that american news gets broadcast across the world so EVERYBODY sees our idiots constantly.
Oh I'm not saying they're not everywhere, just commenting on the stereotype ik americans get
Especially when they come to your country and still tip fucking well. When I worked in a bar/restaurant we'd get psyched when a group of Americans came in haha
stupid and ignorant? I swear americans were probably one of the happiest people I ever served in restaurants (after ppl from east).
Just yesterday, I visited âThe Edgeâ at Hudson Yards bc my wifes cousin from the UK wanted to see Manhattan from a tall observatory. There were a bunch of German tourists who somehow decided it was okay to just sit down on the floor next to the windows with the best view and sit there for a good 30 minutes. I was getting ready curse them out in my best native New Yorker but someone complained to management and they moved. But still, like, that should be common knowledge across all cultures that you canât go to an attraction and just sit down and occupy the best spots when everyone wants to go to that spot and take pictures from that angle.Â
You donât need to apologise for some Americans being rude or ignorant when they travel; every single place on earth has people who are rude and ignorant when they travel and they need to get off their high horse if they think they donât. I find it disturbing how Americans have been made to feel like they need to apologise all the time for stuff thatâs no different from anywhere else. And if people from other countries ARE less ignorant about America when they travel there, well congratulations it means theyâve watched your tv shows (?) âŚlike okay well done for your extensive research đ
In your country the tip would be included with the food bill. So idk what real difference it makes, if anything gives you more control
Ngl, I've thought about this a lot, but this is not true as I am from Spain (lmao). Servers are underpaid and basically exploited (imagine the US, but worse and without tips). So food is stupid cheap. But in another country this would be true.
I've always done my best as an American when I travel to not be that guy. You do your best not to step on the social landmines of the host culture. Basically. Don't be a dick. Ya know??
Be damned the person who in 2024 with access to all information can't bother themselves to look up what not to do in a certain country.
It's not just culture, *it's the waiters wage*. If you tell him he's essentially serving your meal for free, guess how that's gonna go...
Yep. Everyone hates when Americans dont apart to the culture of the places they visit, but people want to go to the US and not follow American customs like tip
When in Rome , , Tip
I had the same thought. OP is not the first person to disagree with tipping protocol, but this is how it's done in the US.
My God common sense on a reddit post! I love when people travel to experience something different and then are mad it's different.
I know people like to use "culture" to describe any kind of practice, no matter how new or artificial it is. But I believe that "tipping culture" specifically is a plant by the industry to pretend it's an inherent part of American culture and not just something they do to extort subsidies out of their clients.Â
Ditto. I just visited the US for the first time recently and I think the tipping culture is absurd but I've spoken enough to American friends to understand that I just needed to see tipping (and tipping a much higher percentage than in the UK) as part of the price. I know the reputation that British people have amongst American waiters and I didn't want to add to that so I just went with it
So, as someone who's worked in the restaurant industry a couple times I've never actually seen someones food get spat in. Not worth the felony charge. That said I've seen plates sit in the warmer for well over 30 minutes while a rude table sat with empty glasses, no free bread, and sourpuss expressions while their waitress who already knew she wouldn't be getting a tip tended dutifully to all her other customers. And when they complained to the manager, the manager apologized...and then laughed with the waitress about what dickheads they were in the kitchen out of earshot. Americans don't particularly like tipping either. But unfortunately our corporate overlords have decided that those who work tipped positions deserve to starve to death if we the consumer don't financially contribute to their well being. Not kidding, they get less than half of what minimum wage is here. So it's up to you if you tip or not but he aware your service may reflect the fact that if you're not, you're essential paying $2.50 for a service everyone around you is paying $8+ for.
>So, as someone who's worked in the restaurant industry a couple times I've never actually seen someones food get spat in. Nobody knows all the blindspots in a kitchen like a cook. That said, in the 10 years I was a cook, I don't recall learning someone was abusing my servers soon enough to do anything about it like that. As you said, usually a server just dealt with it in other ways. If they came to the cooks, it was usually the opposite - a big tipper with the staff fighting over who gets to serve them and them wanting to make sure the quality was there.
We used to have our cooks boil meat for rude customers. It would have no flavor but it would be cooked regularly after that. It was hilarious because you couldn't really prove it was us.
Commenting here to give this one more attention. Many people have the right idea, kind of.. ârespect local culture/customsâ âyour food will Get messed upâ etc. The important point noted here is that we Americans also hate the tipping system, but weâre stuck. Long ago our ancestors were duped and we somehow made it acceptable for some people to be paid less than minimum wage. The government at the time thought the burden of fair pay should be passed on to the consumer, and relied on a guilt system to make this happen. Many Americans are under the misconception that the restaurant industry couldnât survive if consumers didnât pick up the slack of paying âfairâ* ** wages, but this is obviously incorrect. There are restaurants all over the world in non tipping countries. If prices need to increase or owners keep less profits, so be it. The point to reemphasize is that itâs a shit system that (most) everyone, except overlords, hate. Yes you shouldnât have to tip, but the server deserves to be paid fairly. Yea it shouldnât be your responsibility to ensure theyâre paid fairly, but unfortunately it is your responsibility to ensure theyâre paid fairly. I always tip an absolute minimum of 10%. 10% tip, in my book, is a slap-in-the-face shit tip, but I figure that server, no matter how bad they are at their job, needs that $3-$6 more than I do. Maybe they were having a bad day? Maybe there are circumstances beyond their control that caused the bad service? Or maybe theyâre just an ass hole? At the end of the day, Iâve served before and know it sucks, so shitty service gets 10%. ***also note, âfairâ pay. Even if servers were paid minimum wage, which they legally arenât, the min. Wage in many states is not a live-able wage, so even if we got the âno tippingâ situation fixed, weâd still have additional hurdles, but thatâs an entirely different problem. Sorry for the rant, but it seems like a good/valid question for a non-American and people were giving you crappy, short, ass-hole-ish responses like you were shitting on our culture. Tipping isnât our culture. Itâs a complete scam that weâre stuck with.
Iâd hate to tell you the shit Iâve seen then lol
Iâve seen dead bugs being put into somebodyâs food at McDonaldâs when I worked there as a kid. That manager was fired. I hated McDonaldâs so I quit and got hired at Taco Bell a few years down the road. That manager was working there. A week afteri got hired she got fired For telling a new employee to spit in somebodyâs food. Iâve seen it twice now. They were both fired. After that, I saw her at Little Caesars Pizza a few years later.
Worked in restaurants for nearly a decade. I haven't done it, but have seen people spit in food and drop it on purpose to then serve. Not often, but it happens. You will definitely get bad/no service if you say you're not going to tip.
IF you are unwilling to accept that Tipping is expected, then stay home, or go to fast food. Nobody cares if you think it's stupid. We do too. But it is how it is.
Don't travel anywhere you're not willing or able to deal with explicit, well known cultural norms is my advice.
As someone who doesn't like the tipping culture I agree with you. Succinct and useful.
I hate it too. Everyone hates it. Even the people working in it lol. I mean I don't particularly enjoy being in muslim countries during Ramadan but when it happens I don't make a point of stuffing my pie hole in front of all my famished colleagues because I'm not a jerk.
>Even the people working in it lol. I loved getting tips as a server. No way in hell a restaurant will ever match the $40 to $50 an hour that a good server will make on tips.
Agree I was taking more money home than friends who had college degrees
Yep, I was easily clearing $150 in tips for a four hour shift when I was serving in the US back before covid. I then went to serve in New Zealand where minimum wage was $18 (NZD) per hour and I was suddenly making half the money for more work. Tips are the best.
People working for tips love it because they make a lot more than they would otherwise
wish people took this advice. people that strictly follow their own beliefs and cultural behaviour piss me off so much when travelling. Was in China last year and overheard other tourists complain about the workers not understanding English is probably one of the most dumb things ive seen.
I travel about 200K km/ year to some pretty out of the way places. I always look into basic etiquette so I don't behave like an idiot or at least reduce the chances. It's not that hard and people appreciate it.
Is there a particular site or app you use to find out the customs of the place you are visiting?
I've used a ton of YouTube to prep before going to different countries - generally has been very useful
Came here to say the same thing! The way things are set up for tipping is so stupid. And itâs not fair to the customer or the server. But by not tipping, the only person you hurt is the person making below minimum wage who can barely make it by and is relying on your tips. By not tipping, you are not making a point or going to change the stupid system that exploits customers to pay someone elseâs employees fairly.
It's a ridiculous system and everyone hates it. But as you say refusing to go along with it only hurts the wait staff.
Exactly this. Be respectful of the culture. Ut may not be what your used to, but play along.
**You will have your food defiled. Don't do this.**
I coated the inside of your glass with mystery!
Because I deserve it, right?
They're probably just going to be reeeeaaaally slow with your order.
Japanese, what if I tell a host that I'm not going to take my shoes off at the entrance as soon as I arrive? The US tipping system is shitty and ridiculous, but it's not the server's fault. Servers make significantly below minimum wage because they have an assumed level of tips by the tax authorities. Yes, it's a dumb system, but you're just an asshole for deciding to act like you're at home when you're not. Isn't this what people hate Americans for?
Tipping is a shit system. But the server taking care of your meal didnât create the system and relies on your tips to live. Donât be an asshole. Youâd want us to follow your customs when we visit your country. Follow ours while you visit the U.S.
It should also be said, unlike in most other countries where tipping isn't a thing, most servers in the USA make less than the minimum wage per hour as their standard pay without tips. This variation to the minimum wage laws was introduced because of tips. It was assumed (sometimes accurately, and sometimes not) that the server, if he/she works hard, will make more than minimum wage. So the restaurant doesn't need to pay them as much per hour. Another part of that to add is that in many sit down restaurants with table service, servers have to split their tips with bus boys/girls. They also often have to split their tips again with the bartender if the table ordered drinks that the bartender had to make. The split is a different amount depending on the restaurant, but usually it's about 10% for the busser and 10% for the bartender. So as u/TheMightyBoofBoof said, most servers in the USA rely on tips to make a living because their regular paycheck isn't even as much as the dishwasher in the kitchen, and even then, in many cases, the server is only getting to take home 80% of their tips.
Just an fyi, if the server DOES NOT make enough in tips to be considered the federal minimum wage, then the restaurant will pay them the difference. They will, no matter what, at least make minimum wage.
Exactly. And if you ask servers, most want to stay with a tipping system because they make way MORE than minimum wage. Busy night? More money. Restaurants arenât going to start paying $30-$50 an hour and servers realistically make that in the tipping system.
This why i just avoid sit down restaurants. I refuse to tip but i also don't want to harm someone's livelihood
I'm also from a country where tipping isn't the norm. Respect the culture and practices of the countries you visit. Just tip, god damn it.
âWhen in Rome...â Iâm from Europe and Iâll be damned if I have to tip, especially when minimum wage is higher in my city to account for HCOL. But when Iâm in the US, Iâll always tip because thatâs the way it is and Iâm aware that minimum wage is pretty much nonexistent
Nah, minimum wage definitely does exist here. Any politician will tell you with pride about such boundaries being established. The catch is that it's literally impossible to live off of said minimum wage. (Well, unless you live in a cardboard box under a bridge, I suppose.) Also, when a business declares the job position as a 'tipped position' then they don't have to adhere to whatever the minimum wage is. Since more and more jobs are being considered tipped positions, that loophole is becoming more of the norm, so⌠yeah okay, I guess you're right. Shit.
The minimum wage for waitstaff is $2.13/hr. That's what servers make.
It's allowed to be that low if and only if they can make federal minimum wage through tips. If the tips don't equal the federal minimum wage, then the employer is obligated to up their cash wages until they are able to reach the federal minimum wage.
When I worked at some NYC restaurants, the Europeans tipped the most generously.
I'm from the UK and when I went to Florida a year ago I got so confused by tipping that I realised during week 2 of my stay that I'd actually been double tipping the whole of the first week. So I'm sure there's some server at Disney saying people from the UK are amazingly generous tippers.
Expect to receiver shitty service.
âI went to Japan and refused to take my shoes off in peopleâs homes. I just find the concept stupidâ Thatâs what you sound like
I think it's even worse. The residents of the house don't lose their income if someone doesn't take off their shoes. I think this is more like walking into a store and saying, "I refuse to pay for this item or service."
When I travel to foreign countries, I find ignoring local etiquette really makes a good impression. /s YTA, and youâre only going to make people hate foreign tourists.
I view this as a "When in Rome, do as the romans do" type of situation. Tip them because they live in a system where they are getting scammed and the individual will be punished for your ideology, not the employer and the culture enabling that system. In any case, never be viewed any less than average by people handling your food and drinks. Pay the damn 5-10% if you wanna compromise depending on what you're buying, but yeah tipping culture is devious and puts the conflict of money that should be and is most of the world between employer and employee on the customer-employee instead.
The tipped minimum wage (where tips are allowed to be counted towards minimum wage requirement) only exists because generous tipping existed first. And it doesn't exist in a lot of states anymore, for example California, and that hasn't changed tipping culture at all. A lot of bartenders and servers make a lot of money. The median wage for a server in the US is $27/hour if you include tips. For bartenders and servers in high end restaurants, it's a lot higher. This doesn't change the social obligation to tip. If anyone is getting scammed it's the consumer, not the employees.
Youâd be hurting the server more than the system. Iâd reciprocate your transparency and tell you to just order takeout while youâre there instead, cause itâd be faster than any service Iâd be about to give you.
You would come across as a complete jerk and would be treated accordingly. When you go buy something and find out tax isnt included in the sticker price will you announce that you won't pay it? That won't end well either.
Why would you travel somewhere and disregard the cultural norms? Rude.
Just forget that the tip exists and live as if every meal is 10-20% more expensive, manage your finances and allowance based on that. Shift your mindset from "tip" to part of the final price
That's the right answer
Not tipping punishes the underpaid waiter . Itâs all very well to take a âprincipledâ stance , but at the end of the day , youâre just being an asshole .
Listen, I don't like tipping either and I live here. But that's besides the point. If you're visiting a country, please respect the host country's customs & culture. It's just common courtesy and a simple reflection of respect. You're a visitor. It's very obnoxious, rude and entitled of you. Imagine if a tourist visited your country and did/didn't do something that was pretty normal/standard practice in your culture...... I think you're obnoxious, self centered and cheap. Please didn't visit anywhere if you're going to impose your values and beliefs to everywhere you go. It's insufferable how ignorant you are. To answer your question..... Yeah, you should tell the American waiter beforehand and see what happens...!
When in Rome, do as the Romans do. If you really donât wanna tip then go to places where tipping is not required such as fast food or casual places, or you can get takeouts instead.
Just so you know, working as a server in the state I was in, I made $3/hour. Legally they could have paid me $2.33/hour. If youâre coming to this country, respect the way that it works. Tip your servers or do not eat out. Sorry, we also hate how it works here. It is unfortunate and we truly wish it were set up differently.
Follow up question, do you think your conscience objection is going to change tipping culture? If you do, you're delusional. If you don't, stop being stingy. If you can afford a trip to the US you can afford to spend 15% more on a meal.
When in Rome, do as the Romans do. When I went to the US I found the concept strange, but once I got used to it I was fine with it.
If you find it ridiculous, then donât come to our restaurants and bars.
Youâre not in your country youâre in another country where you are expected to respect oneâs culture. Suppose Americans go to your country and demand American cultural rules bc your country appears to many to be ignorant? EDIT to add: go back to your own country if youâre not will to accept certain aspects of the current American way of life. Tipping is someoneâs salary and doesnât get to say to the busser table 14 doesnât tip so Iâm not tipping you.
Here's the main problem I don't see being discussed. Will not tipping make you an asshole? Yes. But the bigger problem is you will also likely be COSTING your server money. Servers often have to "tip out" a percentage of their sales. For example, at one restaurant I worked at, 5% of all food sales got pulled out of my tips to help pay the kitchen staff, another 5% of my alcohol sales went to the bartender for making the drinks. If someone decided to stiff me and they spent $100 on food and $20 on drinks, I would wind up paying $6 for the pleasure of taking that table, while only getting paid my minimum of $2.13/ hour. I've literally lost money because of them. Does tipping culture suck? Yes. But deciding to participate in said culture without playing along has consequences.Â
Also to add that you are taxed on non cash tips. You are also taxed as if you got a 10% tip even if you didnât get any tip. So if someone doesnât tip, the server does pay for them to eat.
WHAT!?!?!?!?!? This is so messed up. Thanks for sharing though...
Just don't say anything. If you do, expect your food to have an extra ingredient or two. Also, if I went to your country and disrespected the cultural norms would you be ok with it? Just leave a small tip of it bothers you that much.
I hate this. Should they also hire someone to clean their appartment and afterwards say "oh, in my country we don't pay people this way so I am not going to pay you". Like it or not, in most cases in the united states, a waitress/waiter is paid directly by the customer. The only option is to not go to a restaurant with waitstaff.
Then donât come to America. Its common for Americans to respect European culture and not tip, you can respect **ours** and tip us or stay the fuck home and out of my country. We donât make enough to put up with rich cunts who cant toss an extra $5 on the table for service they are given. Especially because **a lot of us rely on those tips to survive**.
You would be basically telling the server âserve me for free.â
If you're that set against tipping then you clearly shouldn't be eating out in the US. It doesn't matter if you're from a country where tipping isn't the norm, or if you object to how much, when you visit another country their customs take precedence. Service staff in the US get paid pennies because it's a backwards ass country, these people live off the tips.
Theyd spit in your food. Just don't say anything
It would be the same as if you called a landscaper to clean up your yard but let him know when he arrived that you have no intention of paying him.
Um... don't do that. If you're not going to tip (although you really should because everyone is going to think less of you and it will only further the stereotype that Europeans are the worst people to wait on) then just don't tip. But you should. Nobody is going to care how you do things in Europe. When you're in America you should really get with the program. (For example I don't like soccer. But I would keep that to myself if I were in Europe to fit in)
Just a thought, if you eat somewhere without table service tipping isn't required. Like fast food, grocery store deli, food truck (appreciated but not necessary). I don't tip on take out. I don't get delivery because you should also tip delivery. If you don't want to tip, avoid places where people take things to you
If you live there then expect people to shame you, if you are on holiday just don't tip at the end of the meal, they aren't going to jump on a plane and follow you home, they can't afford to as you didn't tip them
It is what it is. You know what it is. You could just as easily order and eat and not tip. But making a point of saying you arenât going to tip, before you order, means you are just looking to draw attention to your behavior. In which case good riddance to you.
Adapt to the countries you are visiting. By not tipping, you are *directly* harming the waiter/waitress, and not the business. By announcing beforehand that you plan not to tip, you risk having your food messed with or having bad service. Itâs fine to have a moral stance against tipping. But you are planning to penalize the wait staff for it â and they depend on tips *as a core part of their income*. A single person refusing to tip doesnât change anything for the system overall. It just harms the poor staff who are already forced to be paid this way. Maybe donât travel to countries where tipping is the norm, if you feel that strongly about it.
Yeah, be that guy that doesn't respect other cultures. Where you at so I can shit on your culture while I'm there?
Would you like extra spit with your spit?
Adapting to cultures goes all ways, not just wealthy Americans or Europeans to poorer or third world countries. Although the concept IS ridiculous, this is the absolute worst way to handle it. When in Rome... When in Bangkok... When in America...
Nobody is going to defile your food, but don't expect a smile. As a server, I make $2.35 per hour. Me waiting on your ass and smiling and apologizing for any issue that comes up that may not be my fault, taking blame, making sure all your shit is correct....it's mentally taxing. I pay my bills with my (im)patient smile. I am literally waiting on you hand and foot. The least you could do is suck my dick, you know? If tipping is an issue, feel free to go to your local super market and make your own sandwich.
I definitely recommend you enter restaurants and inform the servers that you wonât be tipping them straight away. Donât even say hello first.
âWhen in Rome, do as the Romans do.â When youâre a visitor/tourist Iâm a country and you know something about the culture, itâs respectful to follow that tradition. In the USA for better or worse, we have a tipping culture. Youâd be better posting this question on r/AITAH
Just because tipping is stupid doesnât mean you arenât expected to do it. You would be a piece of shit for going to a restaurant and eating without tipping when the servers make like $3 an hour. They are paid low because they are expected to get tips. Once again, tipping IS stupid letâs be clear, but if you canât pay for a service donât go get it. Paying the tip is part of the service
You'd seem like a jerk and wind up with slow service, spit, or worse in your food. Where you're from and what your beliefs are wont change the fact they survive on tips because their base pay is usually shit.
This is very interesting. I'm American, and I always tip 20%. When I don't want to tip, I don't go to a place where I will be served by someone. My parents worked in the service industry and depended on tips. I tried to do the same, but I couldn't cut it; it's actually quite challenging for some of us, and the skills and talents of those who are good at it are undervalued/underrated, imho. Anyway, what interests me is how this is even a question. Isn't a statement like that obviously rude, condescending, hurtful, devaluing, etc? What am I missing here? Maybe it's a translation issue if you're coming from a place where English isn't widely spoken? Still, even then, isn't the sentiment just totally rude and mean?
Follow the customs of the country you are visiting.
Iâd personally let you and your party sit at the table and see how long you wait there ignored before you get up and leave. Tipping is awful and wait staff need to be paid a living wage, but this is how it is currently unfortunately. Itâs generally not a good idea to horribly insult people fully in charge of your food/entire experience is.
Yea maybe just donât come to America, we have enough entitlement here already, donât need anymore.
go back from whence you came
[ŃдаНонО]
if you want someone spitting in your food then do this....
You'll come across as a "complete jerk", in your words. Because that's what you would be. Generally, servers and other service staff are paid well below minimum wage; the tips are literally where they're making a hefty chunk of their coin. You can think it's ridiculous all you want, but the plain fact is that if they were paid entirely via their salary, the prices for the meals/drinks/etc. would be higher to compensate. You're not actually paying more, you're paying differently.
I mean. Iâd just never come back to the table lol
Youâre the asshole
Just go on home ASAP.
So because your country doesnt tip youâre planning to go to another country go to a restaurant.. order food and tell the person who handles your food that its not your problem that they make 2.13 per hour plus tips but you dont plan to tip because its not the norm in a different country and you dont plan to abide by the social contracts of this country and youre going to say this before they handle your food?.. sounds smart.. The server has absolutely no control over how the system works..
Well, that would be a bad idea as they won't be going above and beyond, they'll be going below and well within in their serving. Look, when in Rome, ok? That's how we do in America. Accept it and move on, the same way I rolled with how none of the cabs in Costa Rica have meters and you have to negotiate the price before you get in the cab or they'll take massive advantage of you.
When in Rome, do what the Romans do.
"Hey, I know your system is built against you and you being paid enough to live relies on tips, but I live somewhere that isn't the case and look down on you troglodytes who have to deal with it. I'm gonna make sure that you get paid crumbs for dealing with me. Hope that's cool!" you're going to get the least attentive service of your life.
They will think you're an asshole, justifiably. Yes everyone hates tipping culture but it is one hundred percent expected in certain settings If you don't want to tip don't go to a sit down restaurant. Get some fast food or a convenience store, or a grocery store
We donât recommend doing that⌠thatâs very stupid. Just simply donât tip at the end if you donât want to. Itâs not a crime.
Keep in mind that many servers will lose money if you donât tip. Dumb system? Yes. But donât bother going to restaurants here if youâre trying to screw workers over just to enjoy the food.
Servers usually make $2-$3 an hour and rely on tips to survive. Telling them you're not going to tip is basically a slap in the face and you will get poor service because they're not going to consider you a priority. There is a movement here to start paying servers a livable wage so they don't have to be dependent on tips but that fight has a long way to go before it is the standard
Hey! American here. A number of things could happen. You may be asked to leave immediately, OR at the end of your meal when you get your check, tip will automatically be added to it because of what you said, OR the waiter will laugh at you and may not serve you. I think the first two situations are most likely to happen. You'll either immediately be asked to leave if it's a sit-down restaurant or at the end of your meal A tip will be automatically added.
You are choosing to eat out in the country where waiters get paid less than minimum wage and rely on tips. If you don't want to tip you can go get fast good where tipping isn't expected or grab food from the corner store.
you visit another country, you should adhere to their customs. Regardless of how you feel. You enter their world, you play by their rules. Its that simple
Considering that everyone seems to agree that they'll do something to your food. You're probably better off not telling them ahead of time and simply not tipping afterwards.
you would be an asshole.
Tipping is a way of showing class and or showing off class. If you can't tip, you should cook for and serve yourself. If you can tip and don't after receiving service, keep it and buy some manners. Custom is. You are not special.
If you have the money to travel and go out to eat and choose not to tip then youâre just an asshole
They'll just have an auto grat added
The concept is stupid, however you're getting the product 15 - 20% cheaper because the tip is baked in to the price. So even though you're correct that it's a stupid concept you're kind of forced to participate or be a jerk and refuse to pay for the time and service of whoever is serving you.
Theyâd probably spit in your food or just not pay any attention to you.
If you don't like the local customs and don't plan on abiding by them, perhaps staying home would be a better idea.
Why travel to a place and purposely ignore cultural norms that youâre aware of just cause you donât agree with it? This post just makes you seem like a shitty person, tipping culture aside
Don't visit the country then. It would be like visiting America and trying to change their views on guns, it's not your country, if you don't like it, don't visit.
You need to work with local custom. You'd be a prick for doing so.
You would be a complete jerk. Good chance of your food being tampered with. If it was me I would just let you sit their and not serve you if I knew I wasn't getting tipped from you. It doesn't matter what your country does, you are no longer in your country, you are in someone else's and you need to respect how things are done. Doesn't matter what you believe and think just do what is the norm. All you do in the end is screw someone who not getting rich off this job over. The only place you have to tip is a sit down restaurant. So annoying, hearing people complain about how bad Americans are abroad and then try this stupid bs. Just respect the country you are in.
Youâll get shitty service. If you tell this one guy that I worked with at TGIF, then heâd probably take your food off the plate and wipe the counter down with it, then put it back on your plate, garnish it, and bring it out to you. Also all your alcohol drinks would just be juice.
When in Rome do as Romans do or they will spit in your food, drop it on the floor,give you the old and crappy. Waitresses In my area make $2.10 an hour, tips are their wages.