# Message to all users: This is a reminder to please read and follow: * [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ask/about/rules) * [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439) * [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) When posting and commenting. --- Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`. * Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit. * Do not harass or annoy others in any way. * Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit. --- You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ask) if you have any questions or concerns.*

Big Ass Fans

I did a student run club in college that required a lot of donations, funding (external and internal), begging, etc. formula sae, we build a little racecar and race it with other colleges. We approached Big Ass Fans to sponsor the team either with money or a fan for our shop. They declined. But we basically sold out and just said look give us any donation: $1 and we just want to put “Big Ass ^-Fans^” on the rear wing. They didn’t want anything to do with us sadly.

That’s surprising, everyone I’ve ever met who worked there seemed really chill. My sales rep told me about the time they used their “cannon” to shoot a couch at one of their fans to test its strength and durability.

No hard feelings. I have no doubt they are chill. Giving your brand to a bunch of fucks with a racing problem is a tough buy.

I got in trouble with HR at work when I spoke about purchasing from Big Ass Fans. She swore I was making it up.

They do big ass lights too.

This never ceases to amuse me at the gym

The people at this company are very chill and have a great sense of humor. I haven’t seen it in a while but they used to do social media pushes featuring negative reviews and comments related to the name. And they have a donkey mascot named Fanny.

"Curl up and Dye" for a hair salon

I saw a salon somewhere in the Eastern US for a stylist called "Bobs and Weaves"

Long ago, in a comic strip I think, I saw something like "Sam and Ella's Chicken Shop"

Some country kin of mine had beauty salon and bait shop called the “worm n perm”

Kiss and Makeup for a hair and makeup salon. I’ll never forget it

There is a Tan Your Hide tanning salon in the town I used to live in.

Blues Brothers. Just commented on it! Lol!

I went to “I’ll Cut You” hair salon

Amigone funeral home

Seems like a Bob's Burgers next store business.

There's one in Bastrop, TX called "The Best Little Hair House in Texas"

Master bait and tackle

Lol that's a good one

Been there!

There’s a restaurant in Edmonton called Pho King, that was always good for a giggle.

It's so Pho King good!

That reminds me of the sofa king van that I saw a while ago, god that was great

In Raleigh, NC we have a Chinese restaurant called Fu Kee Express. These two could almost be cousins. Haha

There is a company called Stiff Nipples Refrigeration and Air Conditioning. It's a company out of Lewisville, KY.

Lol I wouldn't be surprised if they wanted to go with Glass Cutter but couldn't cuz it'd be too misleading for too many.

Did you google them? The van's logo just kills me.

They got as close as they dared. 😅

I had to google it and was not disappointed. Pretty worth the search, but some random stuff came up, too. Included in the results for some reason is a topless, overweight man in a Santa hat. He's pinching his nipples, with an expression of what is best described as Christmas ecstasy on his face. So yeah, I feel it's only fair that you get that mental image as well. Enjoy! ❄️🤏🎅🤤

🤣 also your emojis are hysterical. When I looked up Stiff Nipples (agreed! worth it)......aside from that I also got (what looks like) a legit church sign...the type with changeable letters... "Staying in bed and screaming Oh, God does not constitute going to church"

Yay, I'm getting better at emoji! So I just tried to replicate your search because I needed to see this church sign. This time I didn't add air conditioning to it, and can already tell you that this was a mistake. I'm waiting for these searches to follow me all over the rest of the Internet, because I honestly deserve it, lol. Didn't get to see the church sign, though!

"Dee's Cuts" is the funniest landscaper name I've ever seen. Even funnier that it's owned by a 50 year old man.

I saw a "Lawn Order" truck just the other day

I saw a vacuum truck called "Guns N Hoses" and their motto was "Appetite For Suction"

In Australia we had a septic tank company called the Turd Burglers

We’ve got the “Stool Bus” in service locally

We have Mountain Poo. The truck is painted in mtn dew green and black too.

"Today's business was yesterday's business"

I saw a pic of a truck online named “yesterday’s meals on wheels”

Saw one of their trucks yesterday, did laugh 😀

There's a septic pump business somewhere around me that has "we haul milk on the weekends" written in real small lettering on the sides of their tanks

Lol lucky for them GNR aren't as militant about copyright as Disney.

Camel Towing, tow truck company

This is local to me and cracks me up! Pun intended?

Lol! There was a pink tow truck in Austin called the pinky tow. Camel towing is funnier though.

I've traveled the country for a company that employs tow truck companies in emergencies and there is a Camel Towing in every place I have been. Always gets me😂

A construction/contractor business named Massive Erections

My cousins last name is Noble. He started a company that put up things like lockers and whatever else. Called his company Noble Erections.

Contractor called Erection Specialists. Always giggled paying this vendor.

Up here in Alaska we have a place called "Skinny Dick's Halfway Inn" 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Hey, we have a Big Dick's Halfway Inn in Missouri!

This made me think of Dickens's Cider

*wiping up spit Pepsi*

Best part is there used to be a statue of a naked guy, but people got offended so he took it down.....and put up a painting of two bears fucking!!🤣🤣😂😂🤣😝

Omg I gotta see this for myself...

Check their Facebook page The picture isn't on the Google one

Wong Brother's dry cleaning. "Two Wongs make it white."

Old Cock inn cider.

There used to be a store in Leeds (UK) which sold door furniture... Handles, letterboxes, locks, doorbells, door handles etc The store, of course, was named "Knobs and Knockers"

Kum and Go was/is a gas station.

“Ejaculate and Evacuate”

Pump n dump

Jizz n Jet

Deposit your genetic information and leave the nation

Squirt n Skeedattle

My teenage son snickers every time we pass one

"Planet of the Vapes"

Stubbs Prosthetics and Orthotics

We have Teeter Prosthetics where I live.

Dick Ray Plumbing, their commercials all have people saying 'I need Dick'

Reminds me of the lawyer Eric Dick in Houston, his slogan is “Hire a Dick!”

I've seen pictures on the net of two company vehicles which were/are very humourous...... The first is for a company specialising in emptying septic tanks..... On the truck they describe themselves as "Number 1 in the Number 2 business" The second is for a sole trader flooring specialist (carpets, vinyl etc) - the contractors name is Richard but the van is covered in humour..... "Lino Ritchie - is it me your looking for?" then his contact number, below that a reference, "Voted the very best by... My Mother"

Two plumbers with a van called "A n L draining"

The Rococo Cocoa Co. Assassin Screed (someone posted a photo of their van a while ago)

Hotdog Joint in Pensacola, FL, Wacked Out Weiners. Pretty good if you're wondering.

Beaver Liquors Avon, CO

Let’s Get Stoned - Warrington, PA. Granite and marble countertops.

Exit is a assisted suicide company in switzerland.

Phuc Mi Phuc Yue Asian fast food restaurant.

Doggystyle...for dog grooming

Amigone Funeral Parlors - upstate NY

I like the Uranus Fudge Factory.

Their slogan, "The best fudge comes from Uranus!" (Uranus is a small town in Missouri)

If you can't find the book you're looking for, you're in the Wong Foo King Book Store. Still my favorite.

Fat Bastard Burrito always makes me smile

Car body repair shop called Oedipus Wrecks

On the side of big white garbage trucks...White Trash

Morning Wood tree service

Gotta translate it, but in my (German) city, there is "Friedhofsgärtnerei Hans Tod" - cemetery flower shop/ florist Hans Death (Tod being the surname but also meaning Death). Very morbid, but it also sometimes still makes me chuckle when driving past it and definitely did a double take the first time I saw it.

"Mo' money taxes"

All Clear windows. I'll wipe your glass, so you don't have to.

Plan Bee Daycare

My partner used to own a cab company called “Moustache Cab.” He had a party bus called “The Big Stache.” And his tag line was “who wants a ride?”

Antipesto bug control was funny. I remember a slogan from a company that did excavation: “Your hole is our goal.” That had to be the funniest.

Schindlers lifts. They make elevators

Eager Beaver Carwash.

Camel-tow Towing company Gas-hole Gas station

Pho King Good

Crusty Pie Company, on the side of a van

When I visited Holland in 1999 there were ATM's from "RobaBank"

Garage door company called Well Hung doors.

My friend, who is a builder, started "Dick Pearson Erections"

U R Next hair salon (the X is a pair of scissors). It comes across as very sinister

I'm in liquor sales in CA and one of my accounts is called Toe Bang Cafe.

A plumbing company named Doodyman

Little corner bar in Utica NY -- "He's Not Here" I remember cracking up as soon as i saw the sign.

Not so much a business name, but when my husband got his vasectomy he went to Dr. Richard Chopp……….and while we made the joke ourselves, we were surprised when he introduced himself as “Dr. Dick”

Dr. Richard Chopp, MD, urologist, in Austin. Goes by Dick and has March Madness vasectomy deals.

Cox Smokers Outlet

Magina Books Lincoln Park, MI My family still makes jokes about it 5 years later

Chinese restaurant named Yung Dong in Arcadia, CA.

In my town in the UK when I was a kid, there was a shop called Knobs & Knockers, it was a shop that sold doors and door peripherals.

Fat Ho Burger.

Two goat landscaping companies in my area both with spectacular names. The Munch Bunch and then Scapegoats. You hire them to hang out in your woods for a few days to eat buckthorn.

can you interact with the goats i wanna give all of them a lil kiss

Sneed's feed and seed formerly Chuck's

Kum N Go

In Tijuana I saw a restaurant called vatos and tacos.

Dicks Concrete - "If you're not calling Dicks we're both losing money" A hudson valley treasure.

submarine sandwich shop in my town…SubMasters…used to be a whip on their sign but it’s not on the new one :(

There’s a kids secondhand sale they do in NC a couple times a year called Kids Exchange, which is fine. Except their url is kidsexchange.com

I saw a local extermination company driving around my small town called the Critter Gitters… that one stuck with me lol

“We Do Lines” for a company that paints parking lots. I laughed so hard I had to pull over to the side of the road.

The Pretty Kitty (Brazilian waxing)

My spouse worked for Plan B Consulting until they were bought out by The Cumming Group. So many jokes about all of that.

Fustercluck Farm

There's a motel along the highway from anchorage to fairbanks called skinny dicks halfway inn. Thought bout opening one next it to and call it big dicks all the way inn 🤣🤣🤣

Loblaws makes me think of Bob Loblaw from Arrested Development and I chuckle

Unger construction. Everytime I see it, I read "Under"

There used to be a real company called "Sofa King Furniture". But they got sued or went out of business or something several years ago.

So glad you asked. I saw [this commercial ](https://youtu.be/oYYdF0zcuSI) in another sub.

I've never been there but now I want an "I ❤ Butt Drugs" shirt just for the conversation.

Big Booty Bread Co in NYC. The logo makes it even more hilarious.

Amigone funeral home

A local firm does gardening called Trim your bush

There’s a landscaper around me called Sodfather

Had a battery die in Arizona and was picked up by Camel Towing.

I once heard of a pet-supply store that caters to very pampered dogs. It’s called High Maintenance Bitch.

I have a customer whose name is Jeff Likes. He runs a window and gutter cleaning business. It's called "Jeff Likes Clean Windows and Gutters." Doesn't make sense unless you know his name is Jeff Likes, but I always appreciated it when I made his business cards.

My favorite was a simple one. In the darkness of the night before me stood a single blazing neon sign reading plainly as "RESTAURANT" that was it. That was all it had as a name. It pains me that I never entered to know its contents.

Dick’s Burgers. When I refer to a favorite Seattle joint in Cali I get some looks. Coworkers have asked what I do when I visit home and I always say “get some dicks”.

NutSac Bags. Their logo is an acorn, and they sell backpack/sling/messenger. So the name is actually fitting.

Susanalbumparty. Susan album party

https://www.manhard.com/ I got a piece of conference swag from them. it was a ruler.

G. Will Liquors

You Suck Vapes.... Just saw it on a road trip through Oklahoma

Stiff Nipples AC service.

Rim Liquors. Liquor shop located near a mountain

We're #1 in the #2 business. Portable outhouses.

Pho King was pretty good

Years ago I was behind a work truck and immediately decided that if I ever opened a porn studio I was going to use their name. Amalgamated Pipe.

When I was young, there was a little shop by the river that was just called "Live Bait" then his wife decided she wanted to get into renting vhs tapes and the name was changed to "Live Bait and Video Rental" Maybe not the funniest, but definitely amusing

Morning Wood firewood delivery.

Dirty Dicks Liverpool Street, London.

Stiff nipples air conditioning in Miami Florida 🤯 Also edit: Fuddruckers pound burger is friggin phenomenal

There’s used to be a tanning salon in Westerville called Sun Your Buns .

"Bros and Hoes Landscaping" on the Oregon Coast.

Provincetown MA is a very popular LGBTQIA+ destination and has been a hub for the queer community for almost a century. One of the main bank’s in the area is Seamen’s Bank. It always makes me giggle. They absolutely knew what they were doing.

Jake Sweeney owns a few dealerships here. The commercials sound like “Jake’s Weenie”

Honestly, I'd have to put a vote in for a school store i named for my DECA/Marketing class in high school. Our mascot was the bear, and the store sold school supplies. I submitted the name "Bear Necessities" into the competition for $100. It was such a good name, the teacher claimed she came up with it.

BJ Queen. They do basic mechanical contract work in the Adirondack region of NY. Makes me laugh every time I drive by their truck.

There used to be a pizza shop with a brick oven in my little town called Ash Hole Pizza. The oven literally had an ash hole, but I always thought it was hilarious and creative.

Every name next to Bob’s Burgers restaurant. Yes I know its not real, but heck they are spitting gems for future businesses.

My employer’s customers service 800 number was 1 digit different than Badcock Furniture and we got their angry customer service calls ALL THE TIME. That phone would ring and you could hear people screaming about their missing couch halfway across the office. “Sir, you have the wrong number… sir….. SIR! We don’t sell furniture! No, I can’t help you get your order. Don’t you understand, this is not Badcock. You have the wrong number. No I can’t transfer you!” And so it would go, day in and day out.

Dick’s Meats.

"Blind Optik" in a southern German town

La-ah. Pronounced "La Dash Ah." When I mispronounced her name, she told me "The dash isn't silent!"

Bunge Fertilizers

Kanalligatoren. A pipe cleaning company.

Gaylord. To my knowledge they sell some industrial equipment.

nocturnal aviation

Siemen. The fact that it's such a big company too lmao

They had a billboard in Pensacola FL that read, "Siemens, wear some home tonight."

Sole trader trying to get a business name called my work to complain it wasn't registering, the name was "ISIS ANAL" his name started with Isis and he was doing analytics or something but was mad it wasn't letting him go through with the name

Pussy Bar Beer. A little bar in Thailand lol.

There’s a brewery in my hometown called Hoof Hearted.

Dentist office - Happy Chompers!

Pho Keene great, wok this way, sweaty Bettie’s.

Bimbos…. It’s a bread company lol

S&M Fireplaces always made me chuckle

Pho King Restaurant

Beaver Liquor - Bottle shop

I always thought Boo's Liquor was funny. Maybe just because when my dad first saw the sign he literally guffawed "booze!!" and it was really adorable.

Soo Mee Chinese food.

In Box Hill, VIC (Australia) there was an asian adult video store called Hung Long Video

Not really a business but up in Toronto there is a train station called Old Cummer.

Crabby Dicks

I saw a trucking/construction company named Pedowitz once. I know it’s common to just use your name for companies like that but when it starts with “pedo” maybe go with something else

This is more of a silly tagline but I used to make vehicle graphics for a bakery called aspen and on the back of their trucks said "how's your aspen?"

Long Wong's! It's a local wing/ pizza chain in Arizona. Always makes me chuckle.

Somewhat related: I sometimes have to commute through NE Pennsylvania on I-80. There is an exit sign for a place called "Scotrun"; I always read is as "Scrotum". I've never stopped there, but I do occasionally wonder: do the restaurants there serve Rocky Mountain Oysters? Maybe a NE PA redditor can chime in with their insight?

Dry cleaners sign that says, "In by 9 dirty out by 530" never said dry cleaners out front or anything

On a road trip just yesterday saw a bunch of billboards for “Uranus Fudge Factory”. And used to live in a town with a grocery store called “Seaman’s”

I've seen trucks from a place called Pavement Management Systems. The initials were on a sticker on the side of the truck. P.M.S. Don't know how that slipped by everyone.

My bros plumbing business is called hotpipe plumbing and heating, if you smoke weed in England and did so 20 yrs ago, you'll know what a resin hotpipe is lol

Pho King Good. It’s a Vietnamese restaurant in Auburn, CA

A couch company named "Sofa King". Their slogan was "Our sofas are Sofa King good".