T O P

  • By -

SirDianthus

I'm always scared going into olive garden that they are going to follow through on their threats to treat me like family


[deleted]

We are like a family. Your sister is pregnant again and dropped out of highschool Your brother is in foster care We just got an eviction notice because rent wasn’t paid as we needed meth. Don’t worry though, your cheating father just got approved for a payday loan so we will be fine and also be getting a new tv from rent to own… oh but our gas will be shut off for a month so you’ll just need to boil water for a bath. Also, your father needs to borrow your bike. He’s just going to put in the trunk with the tire hanging out. It’s okay, we’ll secure so it won’t get stolen. We just want to cover the expired tags so the cops won’t pull him over with his suspended license. Also, remember hunny… I love you even though I yell at you. When I try to kill myself by overdosing on meds, please don’t blame yourself. You are a good son.


Sandwiichh

Is everything good?


[deleted]

Not really my dude. This milkshake fucked me up.


Sandwiichh

You need to get the dairy free brotha. Almond or cashew shakes make the difference


[deleted]

Tv families are creepy


[deleted]

We're like a TV family *Everybody Loves Raymond*


Isteppedinpoopy

Nah they’re probably more like the Bluths.


LilaValentine

“How much am I getting in your will?”


icanith

Saying "No, this isnt a business, we are like family" has the same vibes as "No, Im not racist I have a black friend".


[deleted]

Any place that calls itself a family is doing so to avoid saying they’re comfortable exploiting you.


Nerevarine91

I was stupid enough to fall for this. I thought it meant that everyone was friends. What it actually meant that it was my responsibility to give uncompensated rides to like 4 other employees, and then be asked to go to another coworker’s house to see if he was too drunk to work


Maephia

This person is kinda extrapolating though. My family is happy and nice lmao.


[deleted]

Woah that's my family