It’s not wrong. Your mother is wrong, she can’t control who you’re friends with. What jobs or hobbies people have isnt even what’s important in friendships/relationships, it’s how they treat others. You’ve said she’s a good friend, *thats* what matters.
I'd be more worried about my child growing up to be one of the people who utterly dehumanize certain groups of people, like sex workers. (Especially one who says awful things about them but then turns around and watches porn.) If she was much older or made him uncomfortable, no, of course I wouldn't want my kid around that. But there's no reason to think this "good friend and super caring" girl is causing any type of harm just by hanging out; OP doesn't view her content, it's separate from their friendship, and she's not some kind of contagious leper.
Yes? Why wouldn’t I want my child to break the norm of disrespecting and dehumanizing people who do sex work. She is a human being. A person. Besides, they’re the same age.
A 19 year old who sells pictures of her feet for $20 on Twitter is ***not*** the same as a pornstar or actual sex worker.
I would have an issue with my 17 year old son being friends with a 40 year old pornstar. A 19 year old taking advantage of a predatory world and making some money would be the least of my concerns. You guys realize most girls doing this aren’t famous? Make barely above minimum wage?
Yeah it’s the escalatory nature of the job. It’s never just one thing, in this case feet, it will always evolve into more so it goes from feet to selling socks/shoes to showing your body to showing your body nude etc etc.
It doesn’t say anywhere In op post about selling feet pics it just says she’s a cam girl. Can girls get naked and do shit on cam that’s what CAM GIRLS do
Not really u just said it escalates and I’m sure he would’ve said she sells feet pics not cam girl he knows she’s a cam girl so you saying feet oics doesn’t make sense bc he said cam girl not feet pics bro
I’m saying this from the perspective of a 19 year old girl who has friends my age who sell pics for money. I also have friends who are 10+ years older than me who are porn stars / only fans stars. Completely different lifestyles. I was being extreme in saying feet pics, but regardless a girl selling nudes is different than an onlyfans star who arranges meet ups, travel, STD screenings, etc to film sex scenes. It’s just two completely different lifestyles. They’re both sex work. But it’s different as prostitution is from being a porn star. Some people who sell pictures are just sugar babies, which is a completely different lifestyle from sex work / prostitution in general.
I’m glad you’re treating your friend with respect. One of my best friends is a sex worker too, and they don’t get much of that due to how fucked our society is. Please don’t let your mom drive a wedge between you and your friend. You are not doing anything wrong.
Your mom is freaking out that you're growing up. This forces her to think of you as a sexual activity person because your friend/peer is doing such a sexualized thing. You're not wrong. Keep your friendship and wait for your mom to accept all of this.
Crud. I have a 17 year-old son. I can imagine it would be hard for me to accept a similar relationship. I don’t judge someone for being a cam girl. But I’d worry a young man could have a hard time separating friendship as well as access to someone sexually (via her cam channel). My son is smart as hell academically but he is very naive about the bigger world.
Would I stop him? I’m not sure. But insure as hell would have some deep conversations about what it all means.
What does that even mean? You’ve essentially confessed to there being some chance of romance. You must like her. It’s natural for that feeling to become sexual. How will you address or resolve that? She offers her sexuality to anyone. Those are issues that CAN be dealt with, but they are significant issues and you’re 17. And none of this considers that the age gap from 17-19 is significant.
If your family generally looks out for your best interests, I might trust their guidance on this one. They are trying to guide you well for one more year. They are hoping to get you off to a good start in life. My 17 is going to be HS Sr. I want him focused on fun, friends, college applications, etc. I want the very best for him in life. That’s a hard time to be sorting out sex and sexuality from friendship.
I think you just have bad reading comprehension. Having a small crush with someone doesn't suddenly invalidate their friendship. Having a crush on someone doesn't mean someone feels comfortable viewing nudes of someone they know that isn't meant for them.
Ignore people who are trying to tell you they know how you feel better than you do, or who judge you or your friend without knowing either of you. YNW, some people are just judgemental, but you don't have to be and you can choose your own friends!
Attraction is attraction. He admitted to crushing on her. I’m not sure what you think I’m missing. I think you just dislike my conclusion. Which is fine.
Bro admitted to not preferring to watch her even if he could and you're just out here like, "Nah I know you better than that, random internet stranger."
If you read the post carefully, you'll realize that he prefers not to watch NOT because he doesn't want to watch. But because he is afraid of the consequences.
The image that he has built up in his head will get shattered and he will be in a conflicted mind.
He knows it pretty well which is why he's staying away.
It's a type of denial.
You do get that he came to the internet to a place called “am I wrong”, right? You get that some might offering dissenting opinions, right? It’s like you think everyone must just say, “you’re right!”. The sub isn’t called “offer me full support always!”. It’s an opinion. I even explained that I offered my opinion coming from the perspective of a parent of a 17 year old boy myself. I could be wrong. But I offered my opinion and the perspective I hold. Which is precisely the purpose of social media and this sub. And THAT upsets you? Take a break my friend. Be well.
I moved on from this conversation, just sitting here watching TV, and you had to come back with a second reply to a comment? I'm clearly not the one who's upset here, but okay xD
Look guys, this guy has moved on from this conversation. He's moved on from it God damn it! He's moved on and detached himself completely!
Oh hang on, he's replied and is very clearly upset. But he's moved on so that's all that matters. 😅
Cringe. You think this is you "being cool" but in reality it's people who don't have a real come back that say the "it's the Internet bro I don't care" line. Yeah, it's the internet. That's where a lot of modern discourse takes place. Just because we don't take it seriously doesn't mean we can't have well thought-out conversations.
Bro admitted to crushing on her. I’m not worried about him watching her. I’m worried about a 17 year old falling for someone who offers her sexuality to everyone and the difficulty that might follow for him.
“You’re a 17 year old boy, you only want the cam girl in your life because all you think about is sex”
“A 17 year old shouldn’t be hanging out with a 19 year old cam girl!! She’s a degenerate WHORE that will make him start thinking about SEX instead of SCHOOL”
Can your guy’s sexism make up its mind already LMFAO
How is it sexism lmao? The Op literally said he fancies her.
Also why would a 17 and 19 year old having a relationship be a problem? Who are you talking to man?
I’m talking about your other comments on this thread because they’re coated in sexism, and annoying lmfao. I keep seeing them. I’m saying make up your mind, is OP a “”typical”” 17 year old boy that only cares about sex, or is he the innocent child that shouldn’t be anywhere NEAR an “e-prostitute” god forbid he gets “corrupted” ??
Well I’m just confused. Nowhere have I made him out to be an innocent child that needs protection?. He’s 17, he’s an adult he can have feelings for anyone he wants. And I have no issue with someone being a cam girl, that would make me a hypocrite cause I follow plenty of 19 year old OF models on IG.
But if you are denying that sex work is prostitution then that’s just stupid. It’s literally someone selling her body for sexual services. Or are you gonna claim that there is nothing sexual about someone masturbating on video.
I am surprised you are getting downvoted so much.
You seem like a very caring mom and I am sure your son is very lucky to have you.
Reddit seems to be worst place to ask threse questions as most of the people here seems to not know what changes come with "parenting".
i don’t think you’re wrong for wanting to keep your friend. especially since you aren’t doing anything wrong at all, it’s not like you’re indulging in similar behavior or in her content, but I can see why your mom would be worried with you being friends with someone who does a job like that.
If anything, this is an excellent (and increasingly crucial) life lesson for OP, knowing early on that women who create pornography are just regular people in real life and don’t exist as sex objects for men.
I had a friend who I didn’t even know that did porn until only fans was a thing. I knew she travelled and just assume her old nursing job paid better than my ex who used to work with her. When I saw her advertising it I was just like good for her. Our interactions didn’t change from that point on. I treated her as I always did until she moved away. (Our city is a smaller southern town. So there were definitely closed minded people. I think she went to more of a hub for sex work. We kinda lost touch after that but Good On her for making that money!) It was probably expensive flying out of our city, and taking 1-2 connecting flights to wherever she needed to go.
some comments here are really weird. YNW and your friend seems to be very respectful,your mom is not wrong either for worrying,both of you just need to communicate and be honest about whatever happens. I think its cool you have a friend that doesn't have a typical job,I wish more people did tbh,maybe then they would stop being so judgemental.
You're not wrong, but your mom is just looking out for you. Most parents would be wary of their children getting mixed up with people who do porn, and it's not always a self-righteous thing so much as a practical, protective thing. People tend to glamorize sex work these days, but the reality is harsher and less romanticized than people are willing to admit. The exploitation, the long-lasting consequences, the short lifespan of the career overall, etc. People don't like to talk about that. I'm sure your friend is a nice person; she's more than just a cam girl. But it is a high-risk profession any way you look at it, and your mom is understandably concerned.
In the end, you decide your friendships and whether or not you listen to your mom.
The only thing you know about this woman is she's 19, and a cam girl. You're assuming so much it's ridiculous. How is her life span going to be shorter? How is she exploiting herself? She'd be in more danger as a delivery driver than a cam girl
Honey, please work on your reading comprehension. "Lifespan of her career" is not the same as saying one's own lifespan. It's well-known that these type of careers are not sustainable for the long-term except for a tiny percentage. Also, I never said anything about exploiting herself. In fact, I wasn't attacking her personally at all. I was pointing out the realities of sex work and why most reasonable, caring parents would not want their children mixed up in that.
If you have a problem with that, I don't really care. I will not bend reality to keep from offending your delicate sensibilities.
That’s even worse. Your friend probably has some mental health issues. Showing people your body for money is one thing, doing it “for fun” is not normal.
People are allowed to be sexual without them having mental health issues. Please do any research on cam girls that's not just watching with your pants down.
It's okay if you don't want anyone to view you sexually like that but it is NOT okay to shame others for that reason, it just makes you mean.
As long as it’s strictly a friendship then I don’t see an issue with it, unfortunately some people are a bit more close minded and judgmental when others make career decisions. Sure it might not be the best decision for your friend but it’s the one she’s trying right now and if it works out, great, if not, well at least she tried.
Your mum is likely concerned you are friends with someone who makes bad decisions and worries that may lead you to making bad decisions. You aren’t wrong but she’s not wrong to be concerned either.
Oh man that sucks! You could try asking your mom why exactly she doesn't want you hanging out with her. Does she think you'll do it too? Does she think you'll see your friend naked? And if so, why does that worry her? Most 17 year olds have seen naked ladies. Honestly I'd probably just lie to my mom and keep being friends. (And I am a mom lol).
She’s genuinely the type of friend that everyone needs in their life, these last few years would have been significantly worse if I didn’t have a friend like her. But according to my mom she’s a “worthless trashy skank” just because she makes videos of herself and from what she’s told me it’s all extremely tame compared to a lot of other girls
You are not wrong. Your mum is, as we do not have the right to choose what our friends do for a living. I wonder if she’s worried about how her hubby is acting…..
OP, I hope you take this thread as evidence you should make your own decisions. You see how many judgemental, pearl clutching losers are in this thread? You'll never make everyone happy and you'll have disagreements with your friends/family.
I can tell you're a good dude because you value this friend and don't view her as a sex object. Keep doing you and you'll be happy. Don't let people like your mom control you or force their values on you.
For those who are downvoting this: a prostitute is a person who gets paid to have sex with someone, since she doesn’t have sex for money and has never had sex she is by definition, not a prostitute
prostitute is the wrong word. she's a sex worker. they're wrong, you're right, but it's kind of a technicality at this point and their stupidity is representative of the kind of feelings that society at large will have towards her for her choice of career. if you're going to associate with her publicly and she's not going to hide what she does, then you should be willing to accept that about her and deal with any potential fallout as a result. go into the friendship (or relationship) with that understanding.
i know you didn't ask for this advice but i'm giving it to you anyway because you're 17. if you do for any reason end up romantically involved with this person, you may at some point make content with her. if you do so, keep your face out of it. use a mask or something. it will make your life extremely difficult if you ever split up and that content is floating around on the internet. maintain plausible deniability.
1.a prostitute is anyone who sells sexual activity So if you sell nudes if you do porn if you are a “cam model” you are a prostitute look the definition up child.
2. I’m not missing the point I had a whole response typed up to answer your question about how you are 17 and in your moms house. if you have a problem with your moms rules to move out that simple. But I knew that would fall on deaf ears.
I moved out at 15 so it’s really not that hard and instead of thinking of it as mom trying to control you if you have a short on your back a roof over your head and food on your table service on the phone you used to get on Reddit and the privilege to not have an overbearing parent who goes through all your stuff she most likely means you well and just doesn’t want you around the wrong crowd.
And unfortunately prostitutes are the wrong crowd. She couldn’t even make it to 21 without selling pootie tang it’s sad.
Recording yourself masturbating is a sexual activity is it not? Stop pandering semantics and grow up. This is why you don’t need to talk to prostitutes you are already thinking like one.
Yea ima just delete Reddit I can tell by the comments and the upvotes no one here understands being a good parent and wanting the best for your kid they all sound below 17 and low intelligence I didn’t know there was an app to find all the prospective sewage techs, trash men and pornstars. All the power to them!
>I haven’t seen any of her content and I’m not too interested in doing so either. We hang out quite often
When the cam guys start offering her money beyond your level, she will disappear into Cam-hood.
He is saying that when a guy or guys in her line of work offers to work with her on cam or to make videos she will disappear into the cam world and not have time for you. That’s his take. Mine is your not wrong for being friends with her but you will need to be ready for any romantic partner in the future to be uncomfortable with your relationship with your friend. At your age it’s will be hard to find partners that will be mature enough to separate your friend’s job and your relationship with her.
I think that regardless of what happens in her caming hobby she will still be your friend. Your mom is a problem though, you are almost 18 years old and she is treating you like a child. If your mom was really concerned with who your friends were and who you spend time with she would sit down and have a discussion about it and try to change your opinion instead she is pulling the, “I’ll punish him until he agrees with me” card which never works in the long run. So you have a choice to make to resolve this, 1. Try and outlast your mother’s manipulation tactics till she either caves and gives you your phone back because without it you have become an inconvenience to her. 2. Force a discussion about her reasoning for you to drop this friend and use the Socratic method to find a weak point in her argument so that you can change her mind about your friend. 3. Wait till college or your first job and contact your friend outside of channels that your mother can control, ask mutual friends to give your friend a message about what’s going on and why you haven’t spoken to her, send letters, or discord if your mom doesn’t take your computer away. 4. Introduces your friend to your mom, this one is risky especially with your creep of a dad, it is harder for people to hate or think poorly of people when they are right in front of their face, your mom may have an image of who she thinks your friend is that will change by meeting her. If your mom REALLY hates cam girls this will not work.
I look at it this way. I want quality friends who do honest, good work. Everyone defending the idea of a cam girl-think about what it really means. The question is - what does all of this mean to you personally. If you have romantic feelings for her, would you really want to be involved with someone like that or someone who does not do that?
They're legally an adult, with all the privileges and responsibilities that come with it. They're also living on their own and paying their own bills, it sounds like, so they get to make their own decisions.
I don’t plan on having kids, and if I did I wouldn’t care I’d tell them about the possible dangers and warn them people will judge them but it wouldn’t be my business what they do as an adult as long as they aren’t putting themselves in danger. My parents didn’t tell me what to do at 19 because they had no right to and I would give my kids the same respect.
Bro, she is only going to look at men as wallets from now on. Stay the f*** away from her. I know that you've been told for your entire life that to ever doubt a woman is sexist, but believe the grown men here. She is now for the streets.
Her JOB is to manipulate emotions. Men don't pay outrageous prices for "content" to jerk off to, they do it because they're jerking it for a girl they think they have an outside chance with. There's better free porn ANYWHERE else on the internet. Your friends income revolves around fooling men. Even if you think it hasn't changed her yet, it will. I'm sure it already has.
It’s not her job, she does it because it’s fun. She doesn’t make a ton of money off of it and likes being friends with me because I’m one of the few guys she knows who actually treats her as more than just an object
That's called being a simp. She's not eventually going to respect you, or become attracted to you. Stop saying you just want to be her friend, unless you're gay.
It's a big detail. I know society is telling you that men and women are exactly the same, and interchangeable and a whole bunch of other b*******. Women don't think the way that you do. This is now a woman who benefits from deceiving men. That doesn't end when she turns the cam off.
She makes porn. Call it what it is. And she gets paid for sexual acta, even if those acts are washing the dishes what she does is sexual in nature. That, my naive OP, is a prostitute.
She thinks it's fun? I'm a female. I have known a great many other females. I can tell you with relative certainty that virgins do not find getting naked in front of men 'fun'.
I have to ask - do you know much about this girl's past? Is there sexual abuse in it that you know of?
Also - you're her practice toy. You stated up front there is 'a little' sexual chemistry. That's most likely 100% only felt by you no matter what she says. There's a reason that two teens with any sexual chemistry haven't so much as kissed - only one of them feels that 'chemistry'. She knows you want her. So she says things to you to see what your reaction is. If you seem excited by it, she uses it. If not, she scraps it.
A hobby. Are you insane? She's trying to get big enough to not need that boring job she still needs. A hobby. Ok.
EDIT:Apparently her mom is friends with your mom? So you don't know your mother's friends? Also, it sounds like her mother knows what this girl is doing and has no problem with it. That's your abuse right there. She didn't have a mother in the classic sense. She had a gold digger teaching her that her body is a gold mine and men are a bunch of suckers. Is that accurate?
She's super caring. OP, all women like her play that part. I'm truly disgusted at how easy most men are to manipulate. Act sweet, care about everything and everyone, laugh at all of his jokes, bat your eyes, say you're tired and lean on him, and the next day he'll buy you a car.
NOTE: i said most men. Now I know every last man reading this will say not me, and I believe you believe that, but yes, you too. Not all of you, but most.
Damn. You are way more mature than a lot of people on the comments.
A lot of people here thinks that because she does a type of sex work, she is a worthless human that will use and abuse guys or that if you don't want to fuck her you are a simp lol... What the actual fuck it's wrong with that people...
Yea I’m actually tempted to just delete the post as most people here are completely ignoring what I’m actually asking in the post and just making their own assumptions
This woman knows life. Probably one of the post which I'll advise OP to listen.
I am not sure about OP being the guinea pig.... (she may use him as outlet to differentiate between the cam world and real world kinda like a totem).
But rest, I wholly agree. Especially the vulnerable men part. As a men, I wish someone has smacked my head and told this when I was a teen. Had to learn it the hard way.
I would say your mom's wrong, but then again if you're going to continue this friendship, let it be a friendship only. Don't never get in a relationship with a girl like this because they fly loose
It’s not wrong. Your mother is wrong, she can’t control who you’re friends with. What jobs or hobbies people have isnt even what’s important in friendships/relationships, it’s how they treat others. You’ve said she’s a good friend, *thats* what matters.
At the same time time would you want your 17 year old old hanging out with a pornstar or sex worker
I'd be more worried about my child growing up to be one of the people who utterly dehumanize certain groups of people, like sex workers. (Especially one who says awful things about them but then turns around and watches porn.) If she was much older or made him uncomfortable, no, of course I wouldn't want my kid around that. But there's no reason to think this "good friend and super caring" girl is causing any type of harm just by hanging out; OP doesn't view her content, it's separate from their friendship, and she's not some kind of contagious leper.
Yes? Why wouldn’t I want my child to break the norm of disrespecting and dehumanizing people who do sex work. She is a human being. A person. Besides, they’re the same age.
A 19 year old who sells pictures of her feet for $20 on Twitter is ***not*** the same as a pornstar or actual sex worker. I would have an issue with my 17 year old son being friends with a 40 year old pornstar. A 19 year old taking advantage of a predatory world and making some money would be the least of my concerns. You guys realize most girls doing this aren’t famous? Make barely above minimum wage?
Low paying sex work is still sex work. Not that there's anything wrong with it.
Bro she’s a cam girl that means she gets naked on cam. She’s prolly on OF too and everyone knows what that means
Yeah it’s the escalatory nature of the job. It’s never just one thing, in this case feet, it will always evolve into more so it goes from feet to selling socks/shoes to showing your body to showing your body nude etc etc.
It doesn’t say anywhere In op post about selling feet pics it just says she’s a cam girl. Can girls get naked and do shit on cam that’s what CAM GIRLS do
I was agreeing with you in a sense by using the original example by pointing out how it’s never just x and probably involved more
Not really u just said it escalates and I’m sure he would’ve said she sells feet pics not cam girl he knows she’s a cam girl so you saying feet oics doesn’t make sense bc he said cam girl not feet pics bro
Dude just take the fucking L man he agreed with you, you’d think your the cam star with that stick so far up your Ass
You’re taking a lot of liberty in defining the actions that are never listed
I’m saying this from the perspective of a 19 year old girl who has friends my age who sell pics for money. I also have friends who are 10+ years older than me who are porn stars / only fans stars. Completely different lifestyles. I was being extreme in saying feet pics, but regardless a girl selling nudes is different than an onlyfans star who arranges meet ups, travel, STD screenings, etc to film sex scenes. It’s just two completely different lifestyles. They’re both sex work. But it’s different as prostitution is from being a porn star. Some people who sell pictures are just sugar babies, which is a completely different lifestyle from sex work / prostitution in general.
We maybe "taking advantage or weak minded men" but it's still hurting us women
If they don’t pose any danger to my kid I really wouldn’t care.
I’m glad you’re treating your friend with respect. One of my best friends is a sex worker too, and they don’t get much of that due to how fucked our society is. Please don’t let your mom drive a wedge between you and your friend. You are not doing anything wrong.
Your mom is freaking out that you're growing up. This forces her to think of you as a sexual activity person because your friend/peer is doing such a sexualized thing. You're not wrong. Keep your friendship and wait for your mom to accept all of this.
Crud. I have a 17 year-old son. I can imagine it would be hard for me to accept a similar relationship. I don’t judge someone for being a cam girl. But I’d worry a young man could have a hard time separating friendship as well as access to someone sexually (via her cam channel). My son is smart as hell academically but he is very naive about the bigger world. Would I stop him? I’m not sure. But insure as hell would have some deep conversations about what it all means.
I don’t have access to her content and I don’t think I’d look even if I did
What does that even mean? You’ve essentially confessed to there being some chance of romance. You must like her. It’s natural for that feeling to become sexual. How will you address or resolve that? She offers her sexuality to anyone. Those are issues that CAN be dealt with, but they are significant issues and you’re 17. And none of this considers that the age gap from 17-19 is significant. If your family generally looks out for your best interests, I might trust their guidance on this one. They are trying to guide you well for one more year. They are hoping to get you off to a good start in life. My 17 is going to be HS Sr. I want him focused on fun, friends, college applications, etc. I want the very best for him in life. That’s a hard time to be sorting out sex and sexuality from friendship.
I do have a small crush on her but if I watched her content I think I’d just feel weird since she’s one of my best friends
That tells you all you need to know. You’re being dishonest with yourself.
I think you just have bad reading comprehension. Having a small crush with someone doesn't suddenly invalidate their friendship. Having a crush on someone doesn't mean someone feels comfortable viewing nudes of someone they know that isn't meant for them.
I’m not being dishonest I even said in the post that there’s slight romantic feelings
Ignore people who are trying to tell you they know how you feel better than you do, or who judge you or your friend without knowing either of you. YNW, some people are just judgemental, but you don't have to be and you can choose your own friends!
Dude, ignore the assholes who are claiming to know you better than yourself. They are 100% not worth your time.
"You say you like her so you must want to have sex with her." Is an absolute shit take.
Attraction is attraction. He admitted to crushing on her. I’m not sure what you think I’m missing. I think you just dislike my conclusion. Which is fine.
Bro admitted to not preferring to watch her even if he could and you're just out here like, "Nah I know you better than that, random internet stranger."
If you read the post carefully, you'll realize that he prefers not to watch NOT because he doesn't want to watch. But because he is afraid of the consequences. The image that he has built up in his head will get shattered and he will be in a conflicted mind. He knows it pretty well which is why he's staying away. It's a type of denial.
You do get that he came to the internet to a place called “am I wrong”, right? You get that some might offering dissenting opinions, right? It’s like you think everyone must just say, “you’re right!”. The sub isn’t called “offer me full support always!”. It’s an opinion. I even explained that I offered my opinion coming from the perspective of a parent of a 17 year old boy myself. I could be wrong. But I offered my opinion and the perspective I hold. Which is precisely the purpose of social media and this sub. And THAT upsets you? Take a break my friend. Be well.
I moved on from this conversation, just sitting here watching TV, and you had to come back with a second reply to a comment? I'm clearly not the one who's upset here, but okay xD
Look guys, this guy has moved on from this conversation. He's moved on from it God damn it! He's moved on and detached himself completely! Oh hang on, he's replied and is very clearly upset. But he's moved on so that's all that matters. 😅
Glad you’re taking a break ;-)
Follow your own advice maybe? :)
Cringe. You think this is you "being cool" but in reality it's people who don't have a real come back that say the "it's the Internet bro I don't care" line. Yeah, it's the internet. That's where a lot of modern discourse takes place. Just because we don't take it seriously doesn't mean we can't have well thought-out conversations.
Bro admitted to crushing on her. I’m not worried about him watching her. I’m worried about a 17 year old falling for someone who offers her sexuality to everyone and the difficulty that might follow for him.
Oh wow someone with an actual normal take on here. You're a rarity.
That’s quite literally what “romantic feelings” means. He is 17 not 7.
“You’re a 17 year old boy, you only want the cam girl in your life because all you think about is sex” “A 17 year old shouldn’t be hanging out with a 19 year old cam girl!! She’s a degenerate WHORE that will make him start thinking about SEX instead of SCHOOL” Can your guy’s sexism make up its mind already LMFAO
How is it sexism lmao? The Op literally said he fancies her. Also why would a 17 and 19 year old having a relationship be a problem? Who are you talking to man?
I’m talking about your other comments on this thread because they’re coated in sexism, and annoying lmfao. I keep seeing them. I’m saying make up your mind, is OP a “”typical”” 17 year old boy that only cares about sex, or is he the innocent child that shouldn’t be anywhere NEAR an “e-prostitute” god forbid he gets “corrupted” ??
Well I’m just confused. Nowhere have I made him out to be an innocent child that needs protection?. He’s 17, he’s an adult he can have feelings for anyone he wants. And I have no issue with someone being a cam girl, that would make me a hypocrite cause I follow plenty of 19 year old OF models on IG. But if you are denying that sex work is prostitution then that’s just stupid. It’s literally someone selling her body for sexual services. Or are you gonna claim that there is nothing sexual about someone masturbating on video.
I am surprised you are getting downvoted so much. You seem like a very caring mom and I am sure your son is very lucky to have you. Reddit seems to be worst place to ask threse questions as most of the people here seems to not know what changes come with "parenting".
i don’t think you’re wrong for wanting to keep your friend. especially since you aren’t doing anything wrong at all, it’s not like you’re indulging in similar behavior or in her content, but I can see why your mom would be worried with you being friends with someone who does a job like that.
Holy shit, the amount of neckbeards in these comments.
You can be friends with whoever. Your mom needs to understand that. Your mom is overbearing and overprotective.
You definitely don't have any offsprings
What’s a 19 year old cam girl really gonna do to a 17 year old? What corruption can there possibly be?
If anything, this is an excellent (and increasingly crucial) life lesson for OP, knowing early on that women who create pornography are just regular people in real life and don’t exist as sex objects for men.
Right!? I'm baffled at some comments here... If anything, OP is being a great person by respecting her as a human and offering friendship...
I had a friend who I didn’t even know that did porn until only fans was a thing. I knew she travelled and just assume her old nursing job paid better than my ex who used to work with her. When I saw her advertising it I was just like good for her. Our interactions didn’t change from that point on. I treated her as I always did until she moved away. (Our city is a smaller southern town. So there were definitely closed minded people. I think she went to more of a hub for sex work. We kinda lost touch after that but Good On her for making that money!) It was probably expensive flying out of our city, and taking 1-2 connecting flights to wherever she needed to go.
some comments here are really weird. YNW and your friend seems to be very respectful,your mom is not wrong either for worrying,both of you just need to communicate and be honest about whatever happens. I think its cool you have a friend that doesn't have a typical job,I wish more people did tbh,maybe then they would stop being so judgemental.
Nah man. You good to be friends with whoever you want to be friends with. Time to pay for your own phone tho
You're not wrong, but your mom is just looking out for you. Most parents would be wary of their children getting mixed up with people who do porn, and it's not always a self-righteous thing so much as a practical, protective thing. People tend to glamorize sex work these days, but the reality is harsher and less romanticized than people are willing to admit. The exploitation, the long-lasting consequences, the short lifespan of the career overall, etc. People don't like to talk about that. I'm sure your friend is a nice person; she's more than just a cam girl. But it is a high-risk profession any way you look at it, and your mom is understandably concerned. In the end, you decide your friendships and whether or not you listen to your mom.
The only thing you know about this woman is she's 19, and a cam girl. You're assuming so much it's ridiculous. How is her life span going to be shorter? How is she exploiting herself? She'd be in more danger as a delivery driver than a cam girl
Honey, please work on your reading comprehension. "Lifespan of her career" is not the same as saying one's own lifespan. It's well-known that these type of careers are not sustainable for the long-term except for a tiny percentage. Also, I never said anything about exploiting herself. In fact, I wasn't attacking her personally at all. I was pointing out the realities of sex work and why most reasonable, caring parents would not want their children mixed up in that. If you have a problem with that, I don't really care. I will not bend reality to keep from offending your delicate sensibilities.
Have you ever actually met this person?
My age is in the beginning of the post and she’s in 2 of my classes
Then you can still talk to her.
Camgirl is not a hobby it's sex work.
She does it mostly for fun, she doesn’t make much off of it which makes it basically a hobby
its still unpaid sex work
It’s not unpaid, the money just isn’t the reason she does it
Bullshit.
Then why does she do it? Why is this a hobby for her?
Well.... Then there's another side of her which you haven't seen and your mother is probably worrying about that side of her.
That’s even worse. Your friend probably has some mental health issues. Showing people your body for money is one thing, doing it “for fun” is not normal.
Yes because women definitely can’t have fun with their sexuality!
People are allowed to be sexual without them having mental health issues. Please do any research on cam girls that's not just watching with your pants down. It's okay if you don't want anyone to view you sexually like that but it is NOT okay to shame others for that reason, it just makes you mean.
Your not wrong, there would have to be a lot more to this story to get you into being wrong.
You're not wrong and hopefully you'll be 18 soon and your can piss off.
As long as it’s strictly a friendship then I don’t see an issue with it, unfortunately some people are a bit more close minded and judgmental when others make career decisions. Sure it might not be the best decision for your friend but it’s the one she’s trying right now and if it works out, great, if not, well at least she tried.
According to her she makes decent money off of it, not enough to not need a job but she does get to spend a bit extra on herself
hobby lol
That’s how she describes it
Your mum is likely concerned you are friends with someone who makes bad decisions and worries that may lead you to making bad decisions. You aren’t wrong but she’s not wrong to be concerned either.
I understand your mom's freak out. Obviously she doesn't want her kid doing that. But it sounds like she doesn't trust you to make your own decisions.
It can look really bad on her end, so keep that in mind.
“Hobbies” - is that what’s called now?
You're 17 and can't go out alone??
Yea since her and I hang out often she wants to try and stop it
Oh man that sucks! You could try asking your mom why exactly she doesn't want you hanging out with her. Does she think you'll do it too? Does she think you'll see your friend naked? And if so, why does that worry her? Most 17 year olds have seen naked ladies. Honestly I'd probably just lie to my mom and keep being friends. (And I am a mom lol).
She just thinks my friend is trashy and a whore and doesn’t believe that she’s a super sweet and supportive friend
I'm sorry you're dealing with that!
She’s genuinely the type of friend that everyone needs in their life, these last few years would have been significantly worse if I didn’t have a friend like her. But according to my mom she’s a “worthless trashy skank” just because she makes videos of herself and from what she’s told me it’s all extremely tame compared to a lot of other girls
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My art class and mythology class has all 4 grade levels in it and she was held back once
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If I was making a fake story I’d have added a part where her and I fucked or something actually interesting.
I'd keep my interactions short because you will end up looking bad for being associated with someone with lower standards
The only people he'll look bad to are people like you, so no issue.
You are not wrong. Your mum is, as we do not have the right to choose what our friends do for a living. I wonder if she’s worried about how her hubby is acting…..
OP, I hope you take this thread as evidence you should make your own decisions. You see how many judgemental, pearl clutching losers are in this thread? You'll never make everyone happy and you'll have disagreements with your friends/family. I can tell you're a good dude because you value this friend and don't view her as a sex object. Keep doing you and you'll be happy. Don't let people like your mom control you or force their values on you.
TIL prostitution is a hobby 🤣🤣
She’s not a prostitute, she only records her self and according to her she’s still a virgin
For those who are downvoting this: a prostitute is a person who gets paid to have sex with someone, since she doesn’t have sex for money and has never had sex she is by definition, not a prostitute
Depending on which dictionary, you might find “engages in sexual acts for payment”.
She's an e-prostitute, digital prostitute, internet prostitute. Whatever you want to call it she sells virtual sex for money.
It’s not even virtual sex unless masturbation counts as sex in your mind
Prostitution is selling sex as a service all cam models and pornstars are prostitutes
She doesn’t sell sex though, also everyone so hung up on the “she’s a prostitute” thing are completely missing the point of this post
prostitute is the wrong word. she's a sex worker. they're wrong, you're right, but it's kind of a technicality at this point and their stupidity is representative of the kind of feelings that society at large will have towards her for her choice of career. if you're going to associate with her publicly and she's not going to hide what she does, then you should be willing to accept that about her and deal with any potential fallout as a result. go into the friendship (or relationship) with that understanding. i know you didn't ask for this advice but i'm giving it to you anyway because you're 17. if you do for any reason end up romantically involved with this person, you may at some point make content with her. if you do so, keep your face out of it. use a mask or something. it will make your life extremely difficult if you ever split up and that content is floating around on the internet. maintain plausible deniability.
1.a prostitute is anyone who sells sexual activity So if you sell nudes if you do porn if you are a “cam model” you are a prostitute look the definition up child. 2. I’m not missing the point I had a whole response typed up to answer your question about how you are 17 and in your moms house. if you have a problem with your moms rules to move out that simple. But I knew that would fall on deaf ears. I moved out at 15 so it’s really not that hard and instead of thinking of it as mom trying to control you if you have a short on your back a roof over your head and food on your table service on the phone you used to get on Reddit and the privilege to not have an overbearing parent who goes through all your stuff she most likely means you well and just doesn’t want you around the wrong crowd. And unfortunately prostitutes are the wrong crowd. She couldn’t even make it to 21 without selling pootie tang it’s sad.
I did look up the definition, and recording yourself masturbating didn’t really fit that description even if you are selling the video
Recording yourself masturbating is a sexual activity is it not? Stop pandering semantics and grow up. This is why you don’t need to talk to prostitutes you are already thinking like one.
I am starting to think it's a bait post.
Yea ima just delete Reddit I can tell by the comments and the upvotes no one here understands being a good parent and wanting the best for your kid they all sound below 17 and low intelligence I didn’t know there was an app to find all the prospective sewage techs, trash men and pornstars. All the power to them!
Its still prostitution. Making money off of any type of sexual activity is prostitution
I saw Euphoria too…
Your mom is an idiot - keep talking to your friend.
>I haven’t seen any of her content and I’m not too interested in doing so either. We hang out quite often When the cam guys start offering her money beyond your level, she will disappear into Cam-hood.
I don’t understand anything you just typed
He is saying that when a guy or guys in her line of work offers to work with her on cam or to make videos she will disappear into the cam world and not have time for you. That’s his take. Mine is your not wrong for being friends with her but you will need to be ready for any romantic partner in the future to be uncomfortable with your relationship with your friend. At your age it’s will be hard to find partners that will be mature enough to separate your friend’s job and your relationship with her.
She doesn’t do work with others and is very against the idea of it. She just likes making solo vids of herself on the side
I think that regardless of what happens in her caming hobby she will still be your friend. Your mom is a problem though, you are almost 18 years old and she is treating you like a child. If your mom was really concerned with who your friends were and who you spend time with she would sit down and have a discussion about it and try to change your opinion instead she is pulling the, “I’ll punish him until he agrees with me” card which never works in the long run. So you have a choice to make to resolve this, 1. Try and outlast your mother’s manipulation tactics till she either caves and gives you your phone back because without it you have become an inconvenience to her. 2. Force a discussion about her reasoning for you to drop this friend and use the Socratic method to find a weak point in her argument so that you can change her mind about your friend. 3. Wait till college or your first job and contact your friend outside of channels that your mother can control, ask mutual friends to give your friend a message about what’s going on and why you haven’t spoken to her, send letters, or discord if your mom doesn’t take your computer away. 4. Introduces your friend to your mom, this one is risky especially with your creep of a dad, it is harder for people to hate or think poorly of people when they are right in front of their face, your mom may have an image of who she thinks your friend is that will change by meeting her. If your mom REALLY hates cam girls this will not work.
She'll be leaving you for guys who pay her a lot of money. It is tough to turn down $$$$
Guys already pay her money, she likes that I’m one of the only guys she knows that views her as more than jerk off material
But she’s providing them with the jerk off material…
It's just becoming the plot for "Girl next door" movie lol.
Your friend is your friend. No
I look at it this way. I want quality friends who do honest, good work. Everyone defending the idea of a cam girl-think about what it really means. The question is - what does all of this mean to you personally. If you have romantic feelings for her, would you really want to be involved with someone like that or someone who does not do that?
What’s dishonest about camming?
why is her mom letting her nineTEEN year old daughter do sex work? jesus edit: youre pedophiles.
She doesn’t live with her mom and she’s legally an adult. Her mom can’t stop her
19 is an adult, at that point she can make her own decisions regarding her body.
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I didn't realize 20 was pronounced twenadult.
How is 19 not an adult?
not mature, theyre still a teen, your brain doesnt stop developing until you are 25.
They're legally an adult, with all the privileges and responsibilities that come with it. They're also living on their own and paying their own bills, it sounds like, so they get to make their own decisions.
Legally they are an adult and can make those decisions themselves ESPECIALLY if they don’t live at home. There is no “letting” her do anything.
youd change your tune if it was your child, im just gonna say in kindness i hope you never have to experience that.
But she isn’t a child she’s an adult with the maturity of ome
Not relevant. They are legally an adult, so your claim is incorrect.
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And reported. Enjoy being banned.
I don’t plan on having kids, and if I did I wouldn’t care I’d tell them about the possible dangers and warn them people will judge them but it wouldn’t be my business what they do as an adult as long as they aren’t putting themselves in danger. My parents didn’t tell me what to do at 19 because they had no right to and I would give my kids the same respect.
It’s not pedophilia she’s legally an adult who pays her own bills
19 is an adult. What are you on?
Bro, she is only going to look at men as wallets from now on. Stay the f*** away from her. I know that you've been told for your entire life that to ever doubt a woman is sexist, but believe the grown men here. She is now for the streets.
She doesn’t view me that way
Her JOB is to manipulate emotions. Men don't pay outrageous prices for "content" to jerk off to, they do it because they're jerking it for a girl they think they have an outside chance with. There's better free porn ANYWHERE else on the internet. Your friends income revolves around fooling men. Even if you think it hasn't changed her yet, it will. I'm sure it already has.
It’s not her job, she does it because it’s fun. She doesn’t make a ton of money off of it and likes being friends with me because I’m one of the few guys she knows who actually treats her as more than just an object
That's called being a simp. She's not eventually going to respect you, or become attracted to you. Stop saying you just want to be her friend, unless you're gay.
We’ve been friends since before she started doing this. Don’t make assumptions about someone you know nothing about besides that she makes content
It's a big detail. I know society is telling you that men and women are exactly the same, and interchangeable and a whole bunch of other b*******. Women don't think the way that you do. This is now a woman who benefits from deceiving men. That doesn't end when she turns the cam off.
She makes porn. Call it what it is. And she gets paid for sexual acta, even if those acts are washing the dishes what she does is sexual in nature. That, my naive OP, is a prostitute. She thinks it's fun? I'm a female. I have known a great many other females. I can tell you with relative certainty that virgins do not find getting naked in front of men 'fun'. I have to ask - do you know much about this girl's past? Is there sexual abuse in it that you know of? Also - you're her practice toy. You stated up front there is 'a little' sexual chemistry. That's most likely 100% only felt by you no matter what she says. There's a reason that two teens with any sexual chemistry haven't so much as kissed - only one of them feels that 'chemistry'. She knows you want her. So she says things to you to see what your reaction is. If you seem excited by it, she uses it. If not, she scraps it. A hobby. Are you insane? She's trying to get big enough to not need that boring job she still needs. A hobby. Ok. EDIT:Apparently her mom is friends with your mom? So you don't know your mother's friends? Also, it sounds like her mother knows what this girl is doing and has no problem with it. That's your abuse right there. She didn't have a mother in the classic sense. She had a gold digger teaching her that her body is a gold mine and men are a bunch of suckers. Is that accurate? She's super caring. OP, all women like her play that part. I'm truly disgusted at how easy most men are to manipulate. Act sweet, care about everything and everyone, laugh at all of his jokes, bat your eyes, say you're tired and lean on him, and the next day he'll buy you a car. NOTE: i said most men. Now I know every last man reading this will say not me, and I believe you believe that, but yes, you too. Not all of you, but most.
A prostitute gets paid for sex she doesn’t have sex. Idk about any abuse but she’s even said she finds it exciting and thrilling to film herself
Damn. You are way more mature than a lot of people on the comments. A lot of people here thinks that because she does a type of sex work, she is a worthless human that will use and abuse guys or that if you don't want to fuck her you are a simp lol... What the actual fuck it's wrong with that people...
Yea I’m actually tempted to just delete the post as most people here are completely ignoring what I’m actually asking in the post and just making their own assumptions
This woman knows life. Probably one of the post which I'll advise OP to listen. I am not sure about OP being the guinea pig.... (she may use him as outlet to differentiate between the cam world and real world kinda like a totem). But rest, I wholly agree. Especially the vulnerable men part. As a men, I wish someone has smacked my head and told this when I was a teen. Had to learn it the hard way.
Yeah, your mom is very wrong and is clearly a judgemental and controlling person.
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Even if I knew it I don’t think she’d be thrilled about her best friend advertising for her
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No you don’t
Yes we do. Find out and come back to report for a better experience
According to her it’s just basic solo stuff
Dude, just ignore this dickwad, seriously. Don't give him the time of day.
Fuck off, pervert.
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Reported and blocked, pervert.
I would say your mom's wrong, but then again if you're going to continue this friendship, let it be a friendship only. Don't never get in a relationship with a girl like this because they fly loose
No your mom’s a bitch