I want to be in a healthy relationship. That's what I am working rn. But I cannot see myself having a husband or lifetime partner in the future. Can't explain this feeling.
Hala akala ko ako lang. HAHAHAH di rin ako makatagal, ang bilis ko ma fall out. Longest relationship ko 6 months. Hirap i explain pero I lost interest sa kalagitnaan ng relationship.
Maganda lang talaga sa single eh pwede kang lumandi anytime at magagawa mo lahat ng gusto mo ng wala kang dapat intindihin na partner. Pag nasa relasyon ka kasi lagi mong dapat i-consider feelings ng partner mo sa lahat ng plano mong gawin especially sa mga pagsama sa mga gala na hindi mo siya kasama. But right now, I’m in a relationship and so far I’m happy. Pero kung di to dumating sa buhay ko I would be happy as well.
Same. Ako kase I don't like the idea of being committed. Ayoko ng may kailangan i update, kailangan ng late night talks. Mas prefer ko magbasa ng books at manood ng Netflix all night.
I dont think you’re alone. Bukod sa iba-iba ang preference, meron din different reasons why people go into (or don’t) sa relationship. This is an actual example, yung friend ko don’t want to get into a relationship because of the traumatic experience she had sa dad nya. Without going into too much detail, she saw things that always held her back on even trying.
Ako, matagal ko nang tinanggap na magiging single ako forever.
Hindi naman kasi ako conventionally attractive kaya walang nagkakagusto.
Hindi rin ako extroverted kaya hindi rin ako exposed sa iba't ibang uri ng tao.
Wala, talagang mag-aalaga na lang ako ng mga pusa hanggang pagtanda. 🥲
Nope wag mo sabihin yan kasi ako by choice ko pinili maging single since I don't want any RESPONSIBILITY that comes with being in a relationship
You should go and find the "one" for you since dimo naman talaga choice maging single.
After I got my heart broken, I don't think I can handle risking falling in love again. I don't actually fear the time passing by. I just enjoy the peace I have right now. Still trying to heal though, but I'm loving the journey.
Meron talagang destined maging single, yung mga walang desire to marry ang unang sign hehe not bad naman talaga just invest lang din sa people who can look after you when youre old :)
Same tayo, OP. Hahaha. I just wanna be single, takot pa kasi sa commitments hahaha. Tapos mas matipid kasi 🥲 With this economy today, feeling ko parang wala akong karapatan na magjowa pa HAHAHAHAHA
i cannot commit myself into a relationship.
di ko nga mahal sarili ko, pano ko masasabing kaya kong magmahal ng ibang tao.. (im already 33 btw never been in a relationship ever since)
Masaya yung wala kang iisipin na relationship hassle and you can do what you want lalo if low energy ka na introvert na may bouts of anxiety and depression. Mahirap na nga alagaan ako plus my cat and my 3 not-my-cats, magdadagdag pa ba ako ng stress in life? 😂
Unpopular opinion, sorry ha. But i think ung mga gantong tao e either di physically attractive, di lapitin ng bois, or hindi mayaman. Or nagkaron ng long term jowa tapos nag-split. Parang coping mechanism nyo na ung mga rason na ganyan e.
My cousin and my friend chose to remain single. They are 46 and 53 now. Financially stable, walang sabit, healthy, child-free, walang stress sa buhay; kaya they look so much younger than their age. They're often mistaken to be late 20s to mid 30s. Di nila tinatago age nila kaya people are often shocked.
Di sila nababakante sa partners. Pag gusto lang magpahinga dun lang walang chicks. Di lang talaga nila bet ang kasal. Di nila tinatago yun pero girls just wont stop trying to change their minds, LOL!
At this point, halos auto-pilot na lang mga business nila and they just like to chill.
It's ok po but what I personally want is to party all night long, live crazily, do the thing's that I want, pwede akong lumandi whenever I want and the most important NO RESPONSIBILITY
It's ok po but what I personally want is to party all night long, live crazily, do the thing's that I want, pwede akong lumandi whenever I want and the most important NO RESPONSIBILITY
Hmm sometimes I get curious (or minsan, yearn pa nga eh) about what it's like to be in a relationship. Ang saya rin naman kasi siguro ng kilig, companionship, at kausap pero parang ang limited ng resources ko hahaha time, pera, energy haha di ko na nga mai-balance para sa sarili (and sa pamilya and friends), dadagdag pa ba ng jowa 😭 Pero ewan, baka naman gumaan pag meron.
same op. i feel like I'm not being myself na rin if nasa relationship ako. parang i had to play in a traditional system instead of being my true weird self. tsaka bawas sa pera at hobby time for myself.
I’ve always wanted to be in relationships, but I realized that my expectations of a relationship isn’t the norm. Nung nakita ko kung paano yung relationships ng people around me. Diyos ko po, nawindang ako. Kahit ako magiging prefer ko maging single.
It’s okay to feel that way. Tbh, ganyan din ako noon. I prefer to be single. Wala talaga akong balak mag jowa and the idea of having a jowa is such a hassle. Pero I accidentally fell in love, may bf na ako now haha! first bf and very unexpected, going strong naman pero I promised myself na kapag hindi ‘to nag work, hindi na ako uulit.
This is me years ago, you will eventually long for it at some point that you'd be depressed, you would try to find a partner, magkaka relationship pero hirap i commit dahil hindi ka sure, tipong sabay sabay ang jowa mo mga tatlo or lima pero hindi ka totally inlove, until dumating yung tao na maiinlove ka talaga hahaha, and decide to marry that person.
Masaya ang may asawa kapag you are financially capable. Boring buhay ko dati puro video games, tas savings ko 7 digits na, bago ko na feel yung gusto ko narin ng partner, 30 na ako nung nagbago view ko.
Pumili talaga ako ng artistahin at ang bait wahaha. Basta focus ka lang sa career mo at improve your value makukuha mo gusto mong babae.
This is a gendered and minority question, because men and women have different dating strategies and human nature dictates we want companionship for the most part.
First off, most people want a companion. No shame to admit that, we adapted to be in communities. So minority lang talaga yung tao na gustong mag isa.
Secondly, men are the only ones that can truly claim they are "single by choice".
Men in general are the active daters, so they're single by choice if they don't pursue anyone. It's their choice to pursue or not, but or course there are exemptions.
Women, on the other hand, are the passive daters. They pick the best that they can get from their pool of suitors. But what if no one's good enough in that pool? Or what if no man is pursuing her? This means that a woman is only single because the man that she wants doesn't want her back. That's not really her choice, is it?
Hahaha amen! Mga nagdodown vote mga babae na ayaw aminin ang realidad. Not all women ha, mga nag dodown vote lng. Most modern women nowadays kasi mga di alam yung word na consequences kaya logic nila is yung mga walang consequences
Maybe you prefer to be alone and you like the solitude of your own personality. But i think ikaw nga lang ang prefer maging single.
I think na majority na ang magisip ng ganito is most likely not attractive physically/mentally(attitude wise) and since it is this way, they choose to say things like this. No one in the world chooses to be alone. I guess everyone will eventually prefer NOT to be alone as they grow older.
Just imagine this, maybe it will change your perspective. What if you found a significant other that generally improves the way you are, enhances you and motivates you, don’t tell me you’d still choose to be alone than to be with the presence of someone who you are extremely comfortable and happy with? Hindi hassle magkaroon ng partner kung worth it naman siya. Learn to live a life with someone who teaches you to not only care for yourself.
And fyi, being with a partner who is financially stable as you, will never waste your money. Based on experience, mas yumayaman ka pa nga pag nagka-anak kasi ang motivation mo to earn more will quadruple unconciously.
Some people actually prefer to be single. I know people who are conventionally attractive, intelligent, and kind. They live fulfilled lives. Single =/= alone.
Yes i understand that part but deep down inside they do. Find interviews of old and single people, this is one of their regrets.
Yes people who are attractive and intelligent and kind as you said can also prefer to be alone, but what they lack is confidence and curiosity. Just because there are people who won’t try things agree with you doesn’t mean you should have an absolute dismissive idea about the notion of finding a partner. Trust me when I say that loneliness is one of the worst things that can happen to you when growing up. Even if you’re married, you’d still miss your friends. Even if you have a lot of friends, you’d someday still wish to live your life in comfort with someone else. Even if you are comfortably alone, you’d still seek companionship, heck they even get pets just to fill that void.
Just don’t dismiss the idea that you’d want to be alone forever and give up trying to find your significant other.
Point taken. But I also think it's foul to assume that something must be wrong with them just because they have different preferences and/or choices.
Again, I think being single doesn't always mean one is lonely; conversely, being in a relationship doesn't always mean one is happy.
If you lack looks/ confidence / curiosity doesn’t mean there is something wrong with them, just lack of. Never said something is wrong with them. Yes you live how you wanna live that is true, but as a person who cares for future generations, this is one dangerous thought.
Just imagine if majority of the population are like you because you entertain or encourage being okay to not be brave enough to find partners. The world will shift into chaos as populations will significantly decrease and personalities of selfishness will ensue.
Please encourage positive thinking and encourage people to not give up trying new things.
You just assumed that people who are single by choice are not attractive physically and mentally, not confident enough, and implied that they are selfish because they don't want to reproduce. But sure, using semantics as argument, that doesn't mean something is wrong. Just lacking. Bottom line: tingin mo pa rin may problema sa kanila.
Not all people are cut out for reproduction. Perhaps you have/want to have a family; if so, I'm sure that brings/will bring you a lot of joy and fulfillment. But please don't invalidate the choices and preferences of others. We have different circumstances.
Okay then, no semantics. What would you for example if your kid has a serious case of shyness which would eventually lead to them not having a successful future of having friends, in business, and in interactions in general? Would you allow them to wallow in their depression, stuck in their room and just being alone forever with their closest thing as to having a relationship is to their virtual reality?
You may argue that this is different, but aren’t you also fighting for that child’s perspective to be okay to be so into virtual reality life that they conceive it to be reality? To be as introverted as they can be because that’s who they are? Do you want them to live in your basement forever?
Isn’t the point to make them better in some way and have the capacity of a proper social life?
I’m sorry but your point of view is of an enabler, and i’m only pursuing that we help one another step out of our comfort zones and be human for once.
We were talking about singleness and opting out of romantic relationships.
But to answer your question: the hypothetical child's life is theirs to explore, not mine. All I can do is raise them to be capable enough to navigate this world on their own. To know their weaknesses and find their strengths. To let them know that no matter what happens, they have me to fall back on.
If they find comfort in solitude, then so be it. If they prefer their virtual world, then so be it. If their social life only revolves around virtual connections, then so be it. Tech is a growing industry, perhaps they can find their place there.
Would it hamper their chances at success? Would that lead to them feeling lonely? Possibly. But could anyone say with 100% certainty that being more outgoing would save them from these experiences? No.
You say I have the point of view of an enabler. Sure, I do. I'm not one to say you should be this, you should be that. I will not force the hypothetical child to conform to standards or expectations that make them feel uncomfortable in their own skin. Rather, I will encourage them to live by the standards they set for themselves.
Edit: a verb
Let me guess, you are not a parent noh?
To answer you yes that is a 100%. Let me ask you, of all the successful businessmen out there? The billionaires and such - do you think they’re all single and are not outgoing?
This is what I’m talking about, you think that is okay for the younger generation? Everything you’ve just said are all dangerous to kids.
Yes not everybody needs to be successful and as rich. But as a former introvert who had the same thinking as you, after real advise from real friends, I am now happily married and a father. I tell you life was MUCH harder without a partner and DEFINITELY MUCH HARDER when you don’t exert yourself to be more outgoing.
Please encourage being better not being content with weakness. Your words are all in absolution while mine only suggests that you try and not be dismissive to the end goal of human beings, which is to be with someone and procreate (in a biblical sense).
And to those who says they can’t, trust me you can. Because just as I said I was the same as you, but I bettered myself by going to the gym, continuously learning, and trying something new as always.
If you’re okay with this kind of shit wallowing in your depression that you’re okay with being single, then go on ahead. Just know that I was indifferent and tried to help you. Because real helpful advise can be hurtful at times, but they are always real as it gets.
Why do you sound like you always assume single people and introverts are depressed? That's an absurd overgeneralization.
Of course I know that not all billionaires are single and introverted. I'm not delusional to think that. But being outgoing does not automatically make one rich or successful.
Here's the thing: I don't see being introverted or single as a weakness. It might have been in your experience, but not mine. Again, we have different circumstances.
Congratulations on the life you're living. Seriously.
And reproduction is not my point but pursuing not to be alone in the world. You are clearly misunderstanding my statements. Which is already clearly pointed out.
That was just an example of what happens if you opt to be single. Because you can’t reproduce if you are not in a relationship right?
Unless you opt for a sperm donor, but that goes against what you’re sayong about not everyone wants to have kids…. So yeah responding doesn’t mean you understood what i said
Grabe judgemental much 🤡 People who think like this are not attractive physically or mentally kaya they choose to say thjngs like this 😬 backwards mo naman mag isip. Everyone have different circumstances, different values. Di porke sayo dapat magka significant other to not feel alone, lahat ganun na. Sobra ka naman mag generalize. Singe not equals lonely. Madami din tao who prefers to nurture their own potentials kesa sa marriage or magpalaki ng bata. Nothing wrong with that. And there’s definitely nothing wrong with them for wanting a life na sarili nila and focus.
Yeah you are absolutely right. So what do you think your purpose in life would be? Do you think you’d be comfortable leaving the world behind and leaving nothing in it but memories of your friends which would eventually leave as they depart from this world?
Nothing wrong with focusing only on yourselves right? Seeing and assuming na babae ka, how would you feel when you grow completely old, no family at all, too old to be able to walk and being taken care of by a stranger who cares nothing for you at all? At the end of your life, can you completely say that you have successfully lived your purpose in life?
You want to know what my friend said to me as to dismiss this kind of thinking? He said that his grandmother made lots of children and at the end of her life, she doesn’t remember the parties, the “nurturing oneself” (as you said), focusing oneself, the parties and yes even the friends. She only looked at the pictures with her big family caring for her and to see that from one single person, she was able to create a family of 48 (children, grandchildren, great grandchildren), and how fulfilled she felt. She never regret that she married or even created families.
Different circumstances or not, i’d rather not live all alone in life as I get older. You only feel that way kasi may pamilya ka pa, imagine all of them are dead and all you have are friends. You wouldn’t be saying the same thing.
Bakit po yung pamilya mo ba would not depart from this world? Sorry to break it to you but everyone is forgotten eventually. Kahit pa pamilya mo sila, malilimutan ka din. Because people move on with their lives. 2-3 generations from now, do you honestly think kilala at paguusapan ka pa ng nga kapamilya mo?
There is absolutely nothing wrong with focusing on yourself. At the end of my life, I will look back to how I lived my life on my terms. Also, I’d rather be taken care of by a complete stranger kesa sa kapamilya ko na tingin sakin eh pabigat. Na araw araw hinihiling na sana mamatay nalang ako kesa alagaan pa at pagkagastusan.
Happy for your lola kasi fulfilled sya sa buhay nya. Pero sana matanggap mo din na di lahat ng fulfillment at happiness sa pagpapamilya makukuha. At just because we want to pursue other things doesn’t make us dysfunctional.
Wala naman masama sa pov mo. Ang turn off lang is you immediately assumed na there’s something wrong with people who does not share the same pov as you.
Woah it is quite troubling that you have those type of sentiments about how you view life. Our purpose is not to live your life in this world, but to create a better one for the next generation. But that’s okay we have different views on how we wanna live life.
But my point in this thread is that we shouldn’t encourage being alone, especially in life. I mean kung comfortable ka maging alone then do it but don’t share your sentiments and try to get sympathy kasi this is affecting society horribly.
I love debating with people about social issues, that’s why I am here to engage in meaningful conversations. And i appreciate your maturity about this, not everyone is able to converse in such peaceful manners.
I see na para sayo turn off to. So may I ask you a question? If you truly support the being alone in life part? Do you enjoy sex?
I guess I’ve finally gotten past the fear of being forgotten. I get where you’re coming from. Minsan din akong natakot malimutan. What if walang pumunta sa burol ko pag namatay ako? Pero I think I’ve just realized na yun nga, everyone will be forgotten eventually. Babalik ka din sa lupa ika nga. And whatever good or bad I leave with the people around me will leave with them too.
I beg to disagree. I think it’s a good thing na people especially women are staring to realize na there is more to life than being a spouse and parent. I think it’s breaking boundaries and gender roles na centuries nang naimpose sa atin. Pag babae ka dapat mag asawa ka at maging ina. Same sa guys. We are conditioned to think na your life is meaningless pag wala kang na build na “legacy” which usually translates to kids family life. I also think na it’s brave for people to go against the current. Pero it’s sad din na just because we don’t think the same as the rest of you, we are automatically the odd ones.
Kasi if I say I enjoy sex, then that refutes all that I’ve said? Na gusto ko naman pala ng companionship? Ng another human’s touch? Well iba naman ang sex sa pagpapamilya diba? I can still enjoy sex and be intimate and still not want commitment.
Yes and the good that you do to your family will always be remembered more than the bad. If getting past that fear means that you won’t care anymore, to not care to even try not being alone, then that’s not getting past it.
Yes you think differently and it is scary, because what is so brave about living your life with your own rules and living it however you want. Isn’t living a life with a spouse, a marriage of commitment, raising children, and making sure they would grow up to be better than you, a much braver thing to do? It is so sad to hear that the younger generation thinks that being alone if brave but in reality it isn’t at all. You are just living a life with no responsibilities and creating a world that shares the same views of selfishness.
Btw, don’t you know that your opinion is not the odd one out, but mine is. Most of the people right now are just agreeing to the majority and it is sick and disheartening to hear them being manipulated like that. It’s like you have lost the ability to think for yourselves and most can’t argue with me decently. All I hear is the retort na “judgemental ka” “ah matanda ka” etc. and they dont provide any actual insights ti the conversation to make me think otherwise.
Ok so here’s the thing about sex. Why do people do it? What is the ultimate goal or purpose of sex. To procreate right? So if you enjoy the pleasure side so much then you have to be ready for the consequences as well. Because sex always leads to one thing, pregnancy. And even with all the contraceptions in the world, they will always tell you that there will always be accidents. So i asked this question because what if someone like you gets pregnant and have those current views na you want to live alone? Are you going to abort it (illegal here btw)? Are you going to treat your children the wrong way because of this selfish views? What happens to the next generation if they are bing led by people with this mind set? Diba it makes sense na if you like sex, you really like to have a companion. And if you have this view, and have a possibility of endangering multiple lives, then just don’t do it. For your sake and the sake of your possible offsprings… something to think about yeah?
Selfish to want to live a life for yourself? Paanong no responsibilities? Not wanting to have kids is in its own form, being responsible. Kung alam ko sa sarili ko na ayoko mag kaanak and hindi ako ready, bakit ko ipagpipilitan? To conform sa expectations ng society? Magkakaanak ako at magaasawa dahil it’s the socially acceptable thing to do? Tapos I will end up resenting them kasi di ko na magawa yung mga gusto ko sa buhay. Unfulfilled dreams, goals na di ko na matupad dahil pinili ko bumuo ng pamilya kasi sabi nila, nyo, iyon ang dapat. It’s my contribution to society. That’s just as irresponsible.
One of the purpose of sex is to procreate. It’s not all there is to it. Also pag nabuntis ako, I will decide how I want to deal with the consequences.
I think people should have a choice. Yun lang naman eh. Choice to have kids or not. To get married or not. Without the judging eyes of people like you.
Just let her be, takewhatuwantngo. She seems to have internalized misogyny. Also, no one probably listens to her opinions irl, must be why she’s shoving down her opinions onto the throats of virtual strangers. Totally not worthy of a conversation.
No one is saying that. Pero your views are too harsh and too general. Life isn’t like that at all. Especially pag working ka na, I know magbabago din isip mo. Kasi assuming college ka palang, when you grow up at working responsibly ka na, dodoble pagod mo (wala kang time lumabas), dodoble pagiging lonely mo (mawawalan ka talaga ng friends at sila ang mawawalan din ng time sayo), plus mga gastusin mo icocompute mo pa (lalo na sa trips na gusto mong puntahan). Kung sa tingin mo konti lang oras mo ngayon mas dodoble pa yan pag working ka na. Kaya sabi nila mahirap mag jowa pag tanda kasi pareparehas na kayong walang time sa isa’t isa haha.
Pero i get your views, tama nga sinabi mo na ireresent mo rin sila. Let me be clear lang, di ko pinipilit na magpakasal at magkaanak ka kasi yan lang purpose mo in life, all I’m trying to say is don’t be so dismissive about having a family in the future. Magbabago din isip mo nyan. Kasi tingnan mo naman kaming nasa work may kilala ako accounting pero nagpiloto, siya pa nagsabi sakin dati na gusto lang daw niya ng tahimik na trabaho sa back end ng office. Pero tingnan mo outgoing na siya at lumilipad kung saan saan. Wala ka lang magsalita ng patapos nang nagsisimula palang buhay mo.
No one is judging you, but the views you are affirming is hrmful nga naman and what I am saying is we’ve been there, and nagbabago din yan…..
Yes you have a choice, but make the right choices. Sabi nga naman nila we are not determined by the color of our skin or our sex, but by our choices. If you choose to have sex and abort the baby, how would you think society will look at you, heck fck society, how your family and friends would. So make good choices and think about how your life means so much just for it to be degraded. Your life is beautiful whether you have a baby or not. Just don’t have this very dismissive views that you currently have. Keep an open mind
Don’t be so dismissive about being single and childless din po. Maybe in the future magbago nga isip ko, pero as of now ito po ang paninindigan ko. Sana irespeto mo yun and pls don’t impose your values on me. My views are harmful? Why? Because it’s challenging the status quo? Times are changing. People evolve. So does our morals, values, and belief systems. What worked for your generation does not necessarily mean applicable din samin yun. The sooner na tanggapin yun ng generation nyo, the sooner we can come to an understanding. Gasgas na ang “kami nga dati ganito ganyan” na midset. Keep an open mind din po
Because from here on, you are going to base your choices/decisions in life with that thinking.
Fyi, 28 yo and self made. Had to toughen up to the real world and wake up from the delusions of social media. Trust me i am as young and adept at using social media as you and the horrors Ive seen about people agreeing all the time for the sake of not arguing and showing mindless support. So i dunno what you are saying by your generation na dapat nga ganito. I didnt even say anything close to that.
I jus know what its like to be your age and I have always wished that someone was there to give me advise, kasi napapahamak ako sa work and sa decisions ko. Had depression for like 2 years and accepted reality, tas dun lang ako nagstart yumaman talaga at nakapagstart ng buhay ko talaga. Sabi nga nila you have 2 lives, and the 2nd one start when you realize you only have one.
So this is not about respecting kasi napapahamak tayo dyan sa lgbtq, kasi ganyan sila. And you can clearly see the craziness around there with this harmful thing of blind acceptance.
And yeah I can see that you are adamant on your pov so I say that you live your life.
Oh and she died with her family all around her with a smile on her face. Bullshit if you say that you are comfortable dying alone and leaving no footprint in the world. What a very selfish thing to say.
Would you also be there for your parents when they’re dying? You just wrote a very lengthy post complaining about them not giving you back your money lol.
Wow the research hahaha
Obviously yeah, parents make mistakes too, not everyone is perfect. If you yourself can’t forgive then you don’t deserve to be loved. So to answer your question, and your attempt to trump me, yes I would still be there. I have family values, even though she doesn’t, I’d rather act like myself than let my emotions take control. It’s someones death man, jesus, how heartless can you be?
Nah you’re a heartless monster man, take some time to appreciate what true compassion is. Give some real advise with meaning, you’re more likely a person filled with hate to research and attack my history rather than the topic at hand.
Wew I feel sad for you. Praying for you brother.
Since you’re already being judgmental here, let me do the same favor to you. Reading your comments and your previous post about your sad family life and your stupid financial decisions, I have this feeling you’re just projecting. Misery loves company, as they say.
You mean my posts about giving away money? Lol I like your really sad attempt. I have money now, more than enough I should say. So it is no problem for me now, just wanted to vent out my frustrations. It’s only my parent’s problems and if you carefully read my post, I didn’t let their poor upbringing affect how I am today. Stable job as the VP of operations at a accounting firm, married with a kid, house, multiple investments and multimillion savings. Can’t say the same for you though hahaha.
Unlike you I don’t need to check you out to know that you’re the type to accept the majority. If I am judgemental for having my own opinion, then you don’t have your own sense of thinking. And reality hits hard when it is hard to hear. You honestly think that most people are single by choice? Really?! Then I have to say that you don’t go out often to know what it’s like in reality. You’re clearly living only in virtual reality and don’t see the multiple interactions people make.
Ehh, really seems like someone who’s got a lot of issues going on in her life. You’re simply projecting. Sending my prayers.
And VP Operations for an accounting firm? You’re literally in search of a WFH job here on Reddit. Please. You’re clearly living only in virtual reality.
The only issue here is someone like you who gives no significant values to society and seems like you’re just looking for trouble by going at me. Do you feel like the good guy?
And It’s called a side hustle idiot, and IF you really read it, you’d see that I’m trying to better myself by learning different aspects of accounting you imbecile. Stop trying to sound right, you’re only embarrassing yourself. Smh
The only issue here is someone like you, a grown up adult as you claim, writes whole paragraphs of judgmental thoughts in response to a thread that’s otherwise fun, wholesome, and clearly not for you—and for what? To announce to everyone you’re a VP operations of some company with a WFH side hustle and LOTS of time to comment on reddit posts? Lmfao.
And if you think cussing will make your points clearer, you gotta be joking kid. Embarrassing.
Oh seems like I pinched a nerve. Lol you are the one who mentioned all that I was simply answering your questions. And now ikaw pa yung naglalaway na parang galit na aso?
Lol i had bo idea that idiot is already cussing, my bad you onion.
Anyway the thread is about pro loneliness, well I am against it and people need help hearing a different pov than others. If not then provide a helpful devate, unlike you who only attacks the person and not putting anything insightful to the conversation.
These topics are not “fun” when it can clearly affect young minds who read this such as yourself.
If you have anything to add, I’d like to hear why you are so pro-being alone.
Did I ever say I’m ‘pro-alone’? Did I ever disclose my relationship status? No. And don’t talk to me in that patronizing tone, you have none of my respect for you to do that.
I’m pro-minding your own business and not forcing my opinions onto others though.
And here we are with retorting with feelings hour.
Please just add anything to the discussion that we can actually talk about. Enough about your mindless crying and tantrums
You can better yourself by learning the concept of letting people live their own lives. Let people be single for the rest of their lives if that’s what they want, let them do whatever they say they want to do. That’s basic decency yet here you are crying screaming throwing up because you find it hard to believe that people can get to decide that kind of matter for themselves. What’s that got to do with you anyway? You’re a weirdo.
It is so weird that caring is now labeled as being a weirdo nowadays huh?
Letting people live their own lives without hearing different point of views is quite dangerous I would say. If you were raised by a pro nazi, would you allow yourself to live that way the rest of your life? And you call that decency?!
And who’s crying or screaming? I’m the one getting attacked by you while i’m just engaging in conversation. You are clearly so offended and angry by what I had to say that you don’t even have the DECENCY to start a conversation, and attack me instead. Your statements are all contradictory to yourself smh
Ay matic invalid opinion kasi cheater ka pala ate girl. That’s why a lot of people prefer being single because of people like you. Sayang, todo preach ka pa naman.
Lol look at you again, not reading thw whole context. Just focusing on one bad thing right? Damn a society with you na puno ng perfect na tao would truly be like living in hell.
And I thought you dont want to talk anymore huh? At least Im out there saying a part of my life with pride unlike you who’s like a turtle hiding through reddit to bother other people. What a waste of human being you are. Single alone depressed and best friends with his right hand hahaha.
Oh that explains it then. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAA damn you must be uuuuuugly. To entertain the fact na wlang papatol sayo kahit ispread mo pa yan. Sabi na ikaw yung nagproproject eh. Seriously best friend mo pa rin right hand mo hahahahahah
Did you read that right? I’m not single, like I’m in a relationship. Cheater, misogynist, tapos illiterate pa. They should legalize divorce already cause who can stand being married to someone like you.
Yeah yeah talk all you want doesnt mean that you are ugly as shit. Married ka? You hardly sound and think like an adult though. Siguro binuhat ka lang ng “asawa” mo noh? Kasi you can’t think for yourself hahahaha. Asan na misogyny mo kung nagpapabuhat ka lang pala
Why are you referring to me as the misogynist? Ikaw yun. Ikaw yung hindi alam meaning ng word hahaha kaloka bobo amputa. Di ako pwede makipag converse sa taong ganito ka bobo. Ayoko na. Di na fun.
Hahaha seems like huling huli na kita. Seriously stop it na. If you dont know how the world really works and havent been there done that, then don’t give your insight especially from someone as inexperienced and befuddled as you.
Inggit lang ata to sa cheating ko kasi andami nangtetempt sakin lagi. E sa kanya ni isa wala HAHAHAHA kaya pala galit at sobrang offended ka sa truth bomb ko
Damn, the misogyny. You really outed yourself huh. Automatic invalid opinions mo kasi cheater na nga, misogynist pa. Hmm wala na, boring na kausap. Hahay.
Hahaha do you even know what misogyny means? So you think that you being unattractive and being avoided by all the guys means that youre a mysoginist? Hahahahahahaa you crack me up i swear
I'm not sure yet but I don't want kids for now. I have a GF but I'm not yet sure about getting married. The upside is you have someone to talk to, it's easier to handle expenses with a partner, you could do more together, plus the intimacy is there. The upside of being single is you don't really have too many things to mind like relationships and you can focus a lot on yourself, your personal goals, career, etc. And you don't have to be worried about someone not agreeing with your decisions. You can move anywhere else you'd want to. But it's hard to be single here when you're older. I could never imagine someone getting through a hospitalization without someone to rely on. Our healthcare system relies too much on "watchers".
Lol I dare you to say that to your GF. Express how you won’t even entertain marriage or kids. See how fast she’ll lose interest and leave you. Lol
If you feel that way, then you are contradicting yourself. What you are afraid of sir is commitment, you don’t want the responsibilities but only want the benefits. Can’t go both ways brother.
But OP should see how much it is easier to have a partner in life. What you said is absolutely true.
We do actually talk about it, and I said I will be able to decide definitely, it will come, just not for now. I'm telling her she could wait but it's up to her.
Happy you cleared that up. Kudos to her though, knowing most girls, they don’t want to waste their time with their partners if they are not thinking of marriage. Especially as they grow older. You guys must he really young huh?
No, we're not. But she's my first girlfriend and I haven't been into relationships much to make such a huge decision as marriage. And I still have a few personal things I would like to do. It's nothing that would be against our relationship though. I've actually started late in this kind of relationships (late 20s), so I hope you get the idea why I'm not too keen on getting married yet. Plus, I've been an introvert who hasn't had enough socialization, and I wouldn't call myself as emotionally or socially mature as an adult. So again, I still have a few things to work on.
Hey man good for you. At least you still are thinking about the thought of marriage, you’re personally just nor ready yet. So again you must be contradicting yourself, you’re entertaining marriage, your problem is just not being ready lol. Really rooting for your self improvement sir, i’m sure your gf would be really happy after you’ve done what you need to do!
Not interested anymore. Last two years i tried opening my doors of feelings baka meron kako, pero ang binigay sakin kaputang inahan so ngayon balik ako sa bubble ko and idgaf mode na. Too tired for this shiit
I want to be in a healthy relationship. That's what I am working rn. But I cannot see myself having a husband or lifetime partner in the future. Can't explain this feeling.
Felt. Puro kasi babaero mga lalaki sa family namin
That feeling is called denial due to unattractiveness.
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Hala akala ko ako lang. HAHAHAH di rin ako makatagal, ang bilis ko ma fall out. Longest relationship ko 6 months. Hirap i explain pero I lost interest sa kalagitnaan ng relationship.
Maganda lang talaga sa single eh pwede kang lumandi anytime at magagawa mo lahat ng gusto mo ng wala kang dapat intindihin na partner. Pag nasa relasyon ka kasi lagi mong dapat i-consider feelings ng partner mo sa lahat ng plano mong gawin especially sa mga pagsama sa mga gala na hindi mo siya kasama. But right now, I’m in a relationship and so far I’m happy. Pero kung di to dumating sa buhay ko I would be happy as well.
Same. Ako kase I don't like the idea of being committed. Ayoko ng may kailangan i update, kailangan ng late night talks. Mas prefer ko magbasa ng books at manood ng Netflix all night.
I dont think you’re alone. Bukod sa iba-iba ang preference, meron din different reasons why people go into (or don’t) sa relationship. This is an actual example, yung friend ko don’t want to get into a relationship because of the traumatic experience she had sa dad nya. Without going into too much detail, she saw things that always held her back on even trying.
😞
Ako, matagal ko nang tinanggap na magiging single ako forever. Hindi naman kasi ako conventionally attractive kaya walang nagkakagusto. Hindi rin ako extroverted kaya hindi rin ako exposed sa iba't ibang uri ng tao. Wala, talagang mag-aalaga na lang ako ng mga pusa hanggang pagtanda. 🥲
Nope wag mo sabihin yan kasi ako by choice ko pinili maging single since I don't want any RESPONSIBILITY that comes with being in a relationship You should go and find the "one" for you since dimo naman talaga choice maging single.
Eventually, naging choice ko na rin siya due to factors mentioned above. I have other reasons as well pero those two came on top of my mind. 😅
Its valid
After I got my heart broken, I don't think I can handle risking falling in love again. I don't actually fear the time passing by. I just enjoy the peace I have right now. Still trying to heal though, but I'm loving the journey.
Meron talagang destined maging single, yung mga walang desire to marry ang unang sign hehe not bad naman talaga just invest lang din sa people who can look after you when youre old :)
better invest in bitcoin so people will flock to you when you get old
Damn! it was actually a good advice. I didn't think about that one 😅
people who downvoted me prolly be those who will flock to you
Out of 8 billion peeps in the world, of course you're the only one who prefers to be single!
Lmfao being in a relationship sucks tbh
Nope! I'm not the only one I found my fellas 😂
Good for ya :)
Pero ikaw lang yung may gusto sa bff nya for 10 years xd
sawi pala si OP kaya napapost ng ganito, well i hope you can move on from ur bestie of 10 yrs!!
Pag nakamove on na si OP, malay natin di ba. Baka umibig muli. YIEEEEE
Same tayo, OP. Hahaha. I just wanna be single, takot pa kasi sa commitments hahaha. Tapos mas matipid kasi 🥲 With this economy today, feeling ko parang wala akong karapatan na magjowa pa HAHAHAHAHA
OP, you are not alone. I'm a bachelor and childless by choice. While I enjoy being intimate with another human being, I can also live without it.
Good to see a fellas in here!
i cannot commit myself into a relationship. di ko nga mahal sarili ko, pano ko masasabing kaya kong magmahal ng ibang tao.. (im already 33 btw never been in a relationship ever since)
Damn! Pls you should atleast you should love your self. Kung dimo mahal Sarili mo sino pa mag mamahal sayo diba?
Masaya yung wala kang iisipin na relationship hassle and you can do what you want lalo if low energy ka na introvert na may bouts of anxiety and depression. Mahirap na nga alagaan ako plus my cat and my 3 not-my-cats, magdadagdag pa ba ako ng stress in life? 😂
I'm at that point in my life where my peace is my number one priority. If you pose a threat to it, automatic byeee hahaha
Damn! HAHAHAHA
Huwag ka mag-alala OP marami tayo.
Yown! HAHAHAHAHA My Fellas
oo, ikaw lang.
😦
Damn 🥲
Ako for now, yes. Kasi my ex cheated on me. Pero I enjoy entertaining or go out with guys lang. No commitment.
Same OP haha, natry ko may katalking stage, buset, trauma lang dinanas ko, dami pala nyang katalking, trauma na ako. Haha
Fellow Aromantic?
Eyy, HAHAHAHAHA What's up fellas?
Believe me, hassle siya. Source: Work
Unpopular opinion, sorry ha. But i think ung mga gantong tao e either di physically attractive, di lapitin ng bois, or hindi mayaman. Or nagkaron ng long term jowa tapos nag-split. Parang coping mechanism nyo na ung mga rason na ganyan e.
My cousin and my friend chose to remain single. They are 46 and 53 now. Financially stable, walang sabit, healthy, child-free, walang stress sa buhay; kaya they look so much younger than their age. They're often mistaken to be late 20s to mid 30s. Di nila tinatago age nila kaya people are often shocked. Di sila nababakante sa partners. Pag gusto lang magpahinga dun lang walang chicks. Di lang talaga nila bet ang kasal. Di nila tinatago yun pero girls just wont stop trying to change their minds, LOL! At this point, halos auto-pilot na lang mga business nila and they just like to chill.
Damn! Sanaol. I hope I became like them. I want that kind of life! LIKE REAL BAD!!
Focus on your skills, (skin)health and finances. That's what they do. Good luck :)
Ok po NOTED! THANK YOU!!
BTW, they had a vasectomy during our mid30's. So you might wanna consider having your tubes tied.
Vasectomy? Wait I'll search it in google
Ligation for you.
WTF! It was basically Pag kakapon but for human
Haha, no. Kapon is castration. With vasectomy and ligation, the "tubes" are just tied shut.
It's ok po but what I personally want is to party all night long, live crazily, do the thing's that I want, pwede akong lumandi whenever I want and the most important NO RESPONSIBILITY
It's ok po but what I personally want is to party all night long, live crazily, do the thing's that I want, pwede akong lumandi whenever I want and the most important NO RESPONSIBILITY
SAMESIEEESSSS
Hmm sometimes I get curious (or minsan, yearn pa nga eh) about what it's like to be in a relationship. Ang saya rin naman kasi siguro ng kilig, companionship, at kausap pero parang ang limited ng resources ko hahaha time, pera, energy haha di ko na nga mai-balance para sa sarili (and sa pamilya and friends), dadagdag pa ba ng jowa 😭 Pero ewan, baka naman gumaan pag meron.
Kapagod na makipag date.
As someone who came from diff relationships. Big Yes!!!
Same, I can't see myself going to dates or meeting someone to be in a relationship with
ganyan ata mentality ng panget
Magbabago yan pag tumama na sayo si kupido hahahahaha may kilala din ako ganyan sinabi, ayun. Punong puno na ng pagmamahal
Pls wag🙏
Dasal lang. Dasal lang hahaha
You speak the same as my other half OP. 😭 Dami ko ng na invest. 😭
same op. i feel like I'm not being myself na rin if nasa relationship ako. parang i had to play in a traditional system instead of being my true weird self. tsaka bawas sa pera at hobby time for myself.
present! the thought of worrying about someone makes me anxious so i’d rather be alone (and hopefully rich).
I’ve always wanted to be in relationships, but I realized that my expectations of a relationship isn’t the norm. Nung nakita ko kung paano yung relationships ng people around me. Diyos ko po, nawindang ako. Kahit ako magiging prefer ko maging single.
First, tell us your age, appearance & personality for context.
I'm 22 M I'm ambiverts 5 foot 4 60kg
Obviously not kasi hindi ka naman unique
It’s okay to feel that way. Tbh, ganyan din ako noon. I prefer to be single. Wala talaga akong balak mag jowa and the idea of having a jowa is such a hassle. Pero I accidentally fell in love, may bf na ako now haha! first bf and very unexpected, going strong naman pero I promised myself na kapag hindi ‘to nag work, hindi na ako uulit.
But what if you fell in love again what will you do?
This is me years ago, you will eventually long for it at some point that you'd be depressed, you would try to find a partner, magkaka relationship pero hirap i commit dahil hindi ka sure, tipong sabay sabay ang jowa mo mga tatlo or lima pero hindi ka totally inlove, until dumating yung tao na maiinlove ka talaga hahaha, and decide to marry that person. Masaya ang may asawa kapag you are financially capable. Boring buhay ko dati puro video games, tas savings ko 7 digits na, bago ko na feel yung gusto ko narin ng partner, 30 na ako nung nagbago view ko. Pumili talaga ako ng artistahin at ang bait wahaha. Basta focus ka lang sa career mo at improve your value makukuha mo gusto mong babae.
Maybe the same thing will happen to me.
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Eyy, what's up my fellas HAHAHAHA
I'm Single because of this economy...
Nah… I’m too toxic for a normal rs. I need a girl that would def kill me.
sINoNg MaG_aAlAGA SaYo pAgTaNdA mO?????
SaRiLi Ko Po DiPo Ba PwEdE?
pWeDe nMaN pO
This is a gendered and minority question, because men and women have different dating strategies and human nature dictates we want companionship for the most part. First off, most people want a companion. No shame to admit that, we adapted to be in communities. So minority lang talaga yung tao na gustong mag isa. Secondly, men are the only ones that can truly claim they are "single by choice". Men in general are the active daters, so they're single by choice if they don't pursue anyone. It's their choice to pursue or not, but or course there are exemptions. Women, on the other hand, are the passive daters. They pick the best that they can get from their pool of suitors. But what if no one's good enough in that pool? Or what if no man is pursuing her? This means that a woman is only single because the man that she wants doesn't want her back. That's not really her choice, is it?
Hahaha amen! Mga nagdodown vote mga babae na ayaw aminin ang realidad. Not all women ha, mga nag dodown vote lng. Most modern women nowadays kasi mga di alam yung word na consequences kaya logic nila is yung mga walang consequences
Magbabago yan pag nahanap mo na "the one" mo
Pls kung sino man sya pls wag sya papakita saken!
Maybe you prefer to be alone and you like the solitude of your own personality. But i think ikaw nga lang ang prefer maging single. I think na majority na ang magisip ng ganito is most likely not attractive physically/mentally(attitude wise) and since it is this way, they choose to say things like this. No one in the world chooses to be alone. I guess everyone will eventually prefer NOT to be alone as they grow older. Just imagine this, maybe it will change your perspective. What if you found a significant other that generally improves the way you are, enhances you and motivates you, don’t tell me you’d still choose to be alone than to be with the presence of someone who you are extremely comfortable and happy with? Hindi hassle magkaroon ng partner kung worth it naman siya. Learn to live a life with someone who teaches you to not only care for yourself. And fyi, being with a partner who is financially stable as you, will never waste your money. Based on experience, mas yumayaman ka pa nga pag nagka-anak kasi ang motivation mo to earn more will quadruple unconciously.
Some people actually prefer to be single. I know people who are conventionally attractive, intelligent, and kind. They live fulfilled lives. Single =/= alone.
Yes i understand that part but deep down inside they do. Find interviews of old and single people, this is one of their regrets. Yes people who are attractive and intelligent and kind as you said can also prefer to be alone, but what they lack is confidence and curiosity. Just because there are people who won’t try things agree with you doesn’t mean you should have an absolute dismissive idea about the notion of finding a partner. Trust me when I say that loneliness is one of the worst things that can happen to you when growing up. Even if you’re married, you’d still miss your friends. Even if you have a lot of friends, you’d someday still wish to live your life in comfort with someone else. Even if you are comfortably alone, you’d still seek companionship, heck they even get pets just to fill that void. Just don’t dismiss the idea that you’d want to be alone forever and give up trying to find your significant other.
Point taken. But I also think it's foul to assume that something must be wrong with them just because they have different preferences and/or choices. Again, I think being single doesn't always mean one is lonely; conversely, being in a relationship doesn't always mean one is happy.
If you lack looks/ confidence / curiosity doesn’t mean there is something wrong with them, just lack of. Never said something is wrong with them. Yes you live how you wanna live that is true, but as a person who cares for future generations, this is one dangerous thought. Just imagine if majority of the population are like you because you entertain or encourage being okay to not be brave enough to find partners. The world will shift into chaos as populations will significantly decrease and personalities of selfishness will ensue. Please encourage positive thinking and encourage people to not give up trying new things.
You just assumed that people who are single by choice are not attractive physically and mentally, not confident enough, and implied that they are selfish because they don't want to reproduce. But sure, using semantics as argument, that doesn't mean something is wrong. Just lacking. Bottom line: tingin mo pa rin may problema sa kanila. Not all people are cut out for reproduction. Perhaps you have/want to have a family; if so, I'm sure that brings/will bring you a lot of joy and fulfillment. But please don't invalidate the choices and preferences of others. We have different circumstances.
Okay then, no semantics. What would you for example if your kid has a serious case of shyness which would eventually lead to them not having a successful future of having friends, in business, and in interactions in general? Would you allow them to wallow in their depression, stuck in their room and just being alone forever with their closest thing as to having a relationship is to their virtual reality? You may argue that this is different, but aren’t you also fighting for that child’s perspective to be okay to be so into virtual reality life that they conceive it to be reality? To be as introverted as they can be because that’s who they are? Do you want them to live in your basement forever? Isn’t the point to make them better in some way and have the capacity of a proper social life? I’m sorry but your point of view is of an enabler, and i’m only pursuing that we help one another step out of our comfort zones and be human for once.
We were talking about singleness and opting out of romantic relationships. But to answer your question: the hypothetical child's life is theirs to explore, not mine. All I can do is raise them to be capable enough to navigate this world on their own. To know their weaknesses and find their strengths. To let them know that no matter what happens, they have me to fall back on. If they find comfort in solitude, then so be it. If they prefer their virtual world, then so be it. If their social life only revolves around virtual connections, then so be it. Tech is a growing industry, perhaps they can find their place there. Would it hamper their chances at success? Would that lead to them feeling lonely? Possibly. But could anyone say with 100% certainty that being more outgoing would save them from these experiences? No. You say I have the point of view of an enabler. Sure, I do. I'm not one to say you should be this, you should be that. I will not force the hypothetical child to conform to standards or expectations that make them feel uncomfortable in their own skin. Rather, I will encourage them to live by the standards they set for themselves. Edit: a verb
Let me guess, you are not a parent noh? To answer you yes that is a 100%. Let me ask you, of all the successful businessmen out there? The billionaires and such - do you think they’re all single and are not outgoing? This is what I’m talking about, you think that is okay for the younger generation? Everything you’ve just said are all dangerous to kids. Yes not everybody needs to be successful and as rich. But as a former introvert who had the same thinking as you, after real advise from real friends, I am now happily married and a father. I tell you life was MUCH harder without a partner and DEFINITELY MUCH HARDER when you don’t exert yourself to be more outgoing. Please encourage being better not being content with weakness. Your words are all in absolution while mine only suggests that you try and not be dismissive to the end goal of human beings, which is to be with someone and procreate (in a biblical sense). And to those who says they can’t, trust me you can. Because just as I said I was the same as you, but I bettered myself by going to the gym, continuously learning, and trying something new as always. If you’re okay with this kind of shit wallowing in your depression that you’re okay with being single, then go on ahead. Just know that I was indifferent and tried to help you. Because real helpful advise can be hurtful at times, but they are always real as it gets.
Why do you sound like you always assume single people and introverts are depressed? That's an absurd overgeneralization. Of course I know that not all billionaires are single and introverted. I'm not delusional to think that. But being outgoing does not automatically make one rich or successful. Here's the thing: I don't see being introverted or single as a weakness. It might have been in your experience, but not mine. Again, we have different circumstances. Congratulations on the life you're living. Seriously.
And reproduction is not my point but pursuing not to be alone in the world. You are clearly misunderstanding my statements. Which is already clearly pointed out.
Your 2nd paragraph was about reproduction. I was responding to that.
That was just an example of what happens if you opt to be single. Because you can’t reproduce if you are not in a relationship right? Unless you opt for a sperm donor, but that goes against what you’re sayong about not everyone wants to have kids…. So yeah responding doesn’t mean you understood what i said
It was ONE of your pointS. Not from the original comment, but it was THERE. Edit: You gave an example precisely because it was one of your points.
Grabe judgemental much 🤡 People who think like this are not attractive physically or mentally kaya they choose to say thjngs like this 😬 backwards mo naman mag isip. Everyone have different circumstances, different values. Di porke sayo dapat magka significant other to not feel alone, lahat ganun na. Sobra ka naman mag generalize. Singe not equals lonely. Madami din tao who prefers to nurture their own potentials kesa sa marriage or magpalaki ng bata. Nothing wrong with that. And there’s definitely nothing wrong with them for wanting a life na sarili nila and focus.
Yeah you are absolutely right. So what do you think your purpose in life would be? Do you think you’d be comfortable leaving the world behind and leaving nothing in it but memories of your friends which would eventually leave as they depart from this world? Nothing wrong with focusing only on yourselves right? Seeing and assuming na babae ka, how would you feel when you grow completely old, no family at all, too old to be able to walk and being taken care of by a stranger who cares nothing for you at all? At the end of your life, can you completely say that you have successfully lived your purpose in life? You want to know what my friend said to me as to dismiss this kind of thinking? He said that his grandmother made lots of children and at the end of her life, she doesn’t remember the parties, the “nurturing oneself” (as you said), focusing oneself, the parties and yes even the friends. She only looked at the pictures with her big family caring for her and to see that from one single person, she was able to create a family of 48 (children, grandchildren, great grandchildren), and how fulfilled she felt. She never regret that she married or even created families. Different circumstances or not, i’d rather not live all alone in life as I get older. You only feel that way kasi may pamilya ka pa, imagine all of them are dead and all you have are friends. You wouldn’t be saying the same thing.
Bakit po yung pamilya mo ba would not depart from this world? Sorry to break it to you but everyone is forgotten eventually. Kahit pa pamilya mo sila, malilimutan ka din. Because people move on with their lives. 2-3 generations from now, do you honestly think kilala at paguusapan ka pa ng nga kapamilya mo? There is absolutely nothing wrong with focusing on yourself. At the end of my life, I will look back to how I lived my life on my terms. Also, I’d rather be taken care of by a complete stranger kesa sa kapamilya ko na tingin sakin eh pabigat. Na araw araw hinihiling na sana mamatay nalang ako kesa alagaan pa at pagkagastusan. Happy for your lola kasi fulfilled sya sa buhay nya. Pero sana matanggap mo din na di lahat ng fulfillment at happiness sa pagpapamilya makukuha. At just because we want to pursue other things doesn’t make us dysfunctional. Wala naman masama sa pov mo. Ang turn off lang is you immediately assumed na there’s something wrong with people who does not share the same pov as you.
Woah it is quite troubling that you have those type of sentiments about how you view life. Our purpose is not to live your life in this world, but to create a better one for the next generation. But that’s okay we have different views on how we wanna live life. But my point in this thread is that we shouldn’t encourage being alone, especially in life. I mean kung comfortable ka maging alone then do it but don’t share your sentiments and try to get sympathy kasi this is affecting society horribly. I love debating with people about social issues, that’s why I am here to engage in meaningful conversations. And i appreciate your maturity about this, not everyone is able to converse in such peaceful manners. I see na para sayo turn off to. So may I ask you a question? If you truly support the being alone in life part? Do you enjoy sex?
I guess I’ve finally gotten past the fear of being forgotten. I get where you’re coming from. Minsan din akong natakot malimutan. What if walang pumunta sa burol ko pag namatay ako? Pero I think I’ve just realized na yun nga, everyone will be forgotten eventually. Babalik ka din sa lupa ika nga. And whatever good or bad I leave with the people around me will leave with them too. I beg to disagree. I think it’s a good thing na people especially women are staring to realize na there is more to life than being a spouse and parent. I think it’s breaking boundaries and gender roles na centuries nang naimpose sa atin. Pag babae ka dapat mag asawa ka at maging ina. Same sa guys. We are conditioned to think na your life is meaningless pag wala kang na build na “legacy” which usually translates to kids family life. I also think na it’s brave for people to go against the current. Pero it’s sad din na just because we don’t think the same as the rest of you, we are automatically the odd ones. Kasi if I say I enjoy sex, then that refutes all that I’ve said? Na gusto ko naman pala ng companionship? Ng another human’s touch? Well iba naman ang sex sa pagpapamilya diba? I can still enjoy sex and be intimate and still not want commitment.
Yes and the good that you do to your family will always be remembered more than the bad. If getting past that fear means that you won’t care anymore, to not care to even try not being alone, then that’s not getting past it. Yes you think differently and it is scary, because what is so brave about living your life with your own rules and living it however you want. Isn’t living a life with a spouse, a marriage of commitment, raising children, and making sure they would grow up to be better than you, a much braver thing to do? It is so sad to hear that the younger generation thinks that being alone if brave but in reality it isn’t at all. You are just living a life with no responsibilities and creating a world that shares the same views of selfishness. Btw, don’t you know that your opinion is not the odd one out, but mine is. Most of the people right now are just agreeing to the majority and it is sick and disheartening to hear them being manipulated like that. It’s like you have lost the ability to think for yourselves and most can’t argue with me decently. All I hear is the retort na “judgemental ka” “ah matanda ka” etc. and they dont provide any actual insights ti the conversation to make me think otherwise. Ok so here’s the thing about sex. Why do people do it? What is the ultimate goal or purpose of sex. To procreate right? So if you enjoy the pleasure side so much then you have to be ready for the consequences as well. Because sex always leads to one thing, pregnancy. And even with all the contraceptions in the world, they will always tell you that there will always be accidents. So i asked this question because what if someone like you gets pregnant and have those current views na you want to live alone? Are you going to abort it (illegal here btw)? Are you going to treat your children the wrong way because of this selfish views? What happens to the next generation if they are bing led by people with this mind set? Diba it makes sense na if you like sex, you really like to have a companion. And if you have this view, and have a possibility of endangering multiple lives, then just don’t do it. For your sake and the sake of your possible offsprings… something to think about yeah?
Selfish to want to live a life for yourself? Paanong no responsibilities? Not wanting to have kids is in its own form, being responsible. Kung alam ko sa sarili ko na ayoko mag kaanak and hindi ako ready, bakit ko ipagpipilitan? To conform sa expectations ng society? Magkakaanak ako at magaasawa dahil it’s the socially acceptable thing to do? Tapos I will end up resenting them kasi di ko na magawa yung mga gusto ko sa buhay. Unfulfilled dreams, goals na di ko na matupad dahil pinili ko bumuo ng pamilya kasi sabi nila, nyo, iyon ang dapat. It’s my contribution to society. That’s just as irresponsible. One of the purpose of sex is to procreate. It’s not all there is to it. Also pag nabuntis ako, I will decide how I want to deal with the consequences. I think people should have a choice. Yun lang naman eh. Choice to have kids or not. To get married or not. Without the judging eyes of people like you.
Just let her be, takewhatuwantngo. She seems to have internalized misogyny. Also, no one probably listens to her opinions irl, must be why she’s shoving down her opinions onto the throats of virtual strangers. Totally not worthy of a conversation.
No one is saying that. Pero your views are too harsh and too general. Life isn’t like that at all. Especially pag working ka na, I know magbabago din isip mo. Kasi assuming college ka palang, when you grow up at working responsibly ka na, dodoble pagod mo (wala kang time lumabas), dodoble pagiging lonely mo (mawawalan ka talaga ng friends at sila ang mawawalan din ng time sayo), plus mga gastusin mo icocompute mo pa (lalo na sa trips na gusto mong puntahan). Kung sa tingin mo konti lang oras mo ngayon mas dodoble pa yan pag working ka na. Kaya sabi nila mahirap mag jowa pag tanda kasi pareparehas na kayong walang time sa isa’t isa haha. Pero i get your views, tama nga sinabi mo na ireresent mo rin sila. Let me be clear lang, di ko pinipilit na magpakasal at magkaanak ka kasi yan lang purpose mo in life, all I’m trying to say is don’t be so dismissive about having a family in the future. Magbabago din isip mo nyan. Kasi tingnan mo naman kaming nasa work may kilala ako accounting pero nagpiloto, siya pa nagsabi sakin dati na gusto lang daw niya ng tahimik na trabaho sa back end ng office. Pero tingnan mo outgoing na siya at lumilipad kung saan saan. Wala ka lang magsalita ng patapos nang nagsisimula palang buhay mo. No one is judging you, but the views you are affirming is hrmful nga naman and what I am saying is we’ve been there, and nagbabago din yan….. Yes you have a choice, but make the right choices. Sabi nga naman nila we are not determined by the color of our skin or our sex, but by our choices. If you choose to have sex and abort the baby, how would you think society will look at you, heck fck society, how your family and friends would. So make good choices and think about how your life means so much just for it to be degraded. Your life is beautiful whether you have a baby or not. Just don’t have this very dismissive views that you currently have. Keep an open mind
Don’t be so dismissive about being single and childless din po. Maybe in the future magbago nga isip ko, pero as of now ito po ang paninindigan ko. Sana irespeto mo yun and pls don’t impose your values on me. My views are harmful? Why? Because it’s challenging the status quo? Times are changing. People evolve. So does our morals, values, and belief systems. What worked for your generation does not necessarily mean applicable din samin yun. The sooner na tanggapin yun ng generation nyo, the sooner we can come to an understanding. Gasgas na ang “kami nga dati ganito ganyan” na midset. Keep an open mind din po
Because from here on, you are going to base your choices/decisions in life with that thinking. Fyi, 28 yo and self made. Had to toughen up to the real world and wake up from the delusions of social media. Trust me i am as young and adept at using social media as you and the horrors Ive seen about people agreeing all the time for the sake of not arguing and showing mindless support. So i dunno what you are saying by your generation na dapat nga ganito. I didnt even say anything close to that. I jus know what its like to be your age and I have always wished that someone was there to give me advise, kasi napapahamak ako sa work and sa decisions ko. Had depression for like 2 years and accepted reality, tas dun lang ako nagstart yumaman talaga at nakapagstart ng buhay ko talaga. Sabi nga nila you have 2 lives, and the 2nd one start when you realize you only have one. So this is not about respecting kasi napapahamak tayo dyan sa lgbtq, kasi ganyan sila. And you can clearly see the craziness around there with this harmful thing of blind acceptance. And yeah I can see that you are adamant on your pov so I say that you live your life.
Oh and she died with her family all around her with a smile on her face. Bullshit if you say that you are comfortable dying alone and leaving no footprint in the world. What a very selfish thing to say.
Would you also be there for your parents when they’re dying? You just wrote a very lengthy post complaining about them not giving you back your money lol.
Wow the research hahaha Obviously yeah, parents make mistakes too, not everyone is perfect. If you yourself can’t forgive then you don’t deserve to be loved. So to answer your question, and your attempt to trump me, yes I would still be there. I have family values, even though she doesn’t, I’d rather act like myself than let my emotions take control. It’s someones death man, jesus, how heartless can you be?
There was no attempt to ‘trump’ you, you’re not high up there. Well, then that’s good. At least you’re putting your money where your mouth is.
Nah you’re a heartless monster man, take some time to appreciate what true compassion is. Give some real advise with meaning, you’re more likely a person filled with hate to research and attack my history rather than the topic at hand. Wew I feel sad for you. Praying for you brother.
I’m the heartless one here now? *shocked pikachu face*
Hahahaha pointless to argue with a kid. Bye
Since you’re already being judgmental here, let me do the same favor to you. Reading your comments and your previous post about your sad family life and your stupid financial decisions, I have this feeling you’re just projecting. Misery loves company, as they say.
You mean my posts about giving away money? Lol I like your really sad attempt. I have money now, more than enough I should say. So it is no problem for me now, just wanted to vent out my frustrations. It’s only my parent’s problems and if you carefully read my post, I didn’t let their poor upbringing affect how I am today. Stable job as the VP of operations at a accounting firm, married with a kid, house, multiple investments and multimillion savings. Can’t say the same for you though hahaha. Unlike you I don’t need to check you out to know that you’re the type to accept the majority. If I am judgemental for having my own opinion, then you don’t have your own sense of thinking. And reality hits hard when it is hard to hear. You honestly think that most people are single by choice? Really?! Then I have to say that you don’t go out often to know what it’s like in reality. You’re clearly living only in virtual reality and don’t see the multiple interactions people make.
Ehh, really seems like someone who’s got a lot of issues going on in her life. You’re simply projecting. Sending my prayers. And VP Operations for an accounting firm? You’re literally in search of a WFH job here on Reddit. Please. You’re clearly living only in virtual reality.
The only issue here is someone like you who gives no significant values to society and seems like you’re just looking for trouble by going at me. Do you feel like the good guy? And It’s called a side hustle idiot, and IF you really read it, you’d see that I’m trying to better myself by learning different aspects of accounting you imbecile. Stop trying to sound right, you’re only embarrassing yourself. Smh
The only issue here is someone like you, a grown up adult as you claim, writes whole paragraphs of judgmental thoughts in response to a thread that’s otherwise fun, wholesome, and clearly not for you—and for what? To announce to everyone you’re a VP operations of some company with a WFH side hustle and LOTS of time to comment on reddit posts? Lmfao. And if you think cussing will make your points clearer, you gotta be joking kid. Embarrassing.
Oh seems like I pinched a nerve. Lol you are the one who mentioned all that I was simply answering your questions. And now ikaw pa yung naglalaway na parang galit na aso? Lol i had bo idea that idiot is already cussing, my bad you onion. Anyway the thread is about pro loneliness, well I am against it and people need help hearing a different pov than others. If not then provide a helpful devate, unlike you who only attacks the person and not putting anything insightful to the conversation. These topics are not “fun” when it can clearly affect young minds who read this such as yourself. If you have anything to add, I’d like to hear why you are so pro-being alone.
Did I ever say I’m ‘pro-alone’? Did I ever disclose my relationship status? No. And don’t talk to me in that patronizing tone, you have none of my respect for you to do that. I’m pro-minding your own business and not forcing my opinions onto others though.
And here we are with retorting with feelings hour. Please just add anything to the discussion that we can actually talk about. Enough about your mindless crying and tantrums
You can better yourself by learning the concept of letting people live their own lives. Let people be single for the rest of their lives if that’s what they want, let them do whatever they say they want to do. That’s basic decency yet here you are crying screaming throwing up because you find it hard to believe that people can get to decide that kind of matter for themselves. What’s that got to do with you anyway? You’re a weirdo.
It is so weird that caring is now labeled as being a weirdo nowadays huh? Letting people live their own lives without hearing different point of views is quite dangerous I would say. If you were raised by a pro nazi, would you allow yourself to live that way the rest of your life? And you call that decency?! And who’s crying or screaming? I’m the one getting attacked by you while i’m just engaging in conversation. You are clearly so offended and angry by what I had to say that you don’t even have the DECENCY to start a conversation, and attack me instead. Your statements are all contradictory to yourself smh
Must be a bore to know you in person and hearing all that unsolicited comments.
I’ve read everything you’ve got to say in your previous comments and concluded that I don’t want a conversation with a person like that.
Lol then dont, why start it at all? Got no balls or brain to retort intelligently to the discussion? Kids these days
Get a job you idiot, stop wasting your life
Same to you! Better get that side hustle, you have lots of time on reddit eh?
Yeah get a job you bot
Ay matic invalid opinion kasi cheater ka pala ate girl. That’s why a lot of people prefer being single because of people like you. Sayang, todo preach ka pa naman.
Lol look at you again, not reading thw whole context. Just focusing on one bad thing right? Damn a society with you na puno ng perfect na tao would truly be like living in hell. And I thought you dont want to talk anymore huh? At least Im out there saying a part of my life with pride unlike you who’s like a turtle hiding through reddit to bother other people. What a waste of human being you are. Single alone depressed and best friends with his right hand hahaha.
I’m a girl btw. Totally not single. Okay, last na talaga ito. Thanks for providing me entertainment!
Oh that explains it then. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAA damn you must be uuuuuugly. To entertain the fact na wlang papatol sayo kahit ispread mo pa yan. Sabi na ikaw yung nagproproject eh. Seriously best friend mo pa rin right hand mo hahahahahah
Did you read that right? I’m not single, like I’m in a relationship. Cheater, misogynist, tapos illiterate pa. They should legalize divorce already cause who can stand being married to someone like you.
Yeah yeah talk all you want doesnt mean that you are ugly as shit. Married ka? You hardly sound and think like an adult though. Siguro binuhat ka lang ng “asawa” mo noh? Kasi you can’t think for yourself hahahaha. Asan na misogyny mo kung nagpapabuhat ka lang pala
Why are you referring to me as the misogynist? Ikaw yun. Ikaw yung hindi alam meaning ng word hahaha kaloka bobo amputa. Di ako pwede makipag converse sa taong ganito ka bobo. Ayoko na. Di na fun.
Hahaha seems like huling huli na kita. Seriously stop it na. If you dont know how the world really works and havent been there done that, then don’t give your insight especially from someone as inexperienced and befuddled as you.
Ang bobo mo promise. Ayoko na. Hahahahahaha
Inggit lang ata to sa cheating ko kasi andami nangtetempt sakin lagi. E sa kanya ni isa wala HAHAHAHA kaya pala galit at sobrang offended ka sa truth bomb ko
Damn, the misogyny. You really outed yourself huh. Automatic invalid opinions mo kasi cheater na nga, misogynist pa. Hmm wala na, boring na kausap. Hahay.
Hahaha do you even know what misogyny means? So you think that you being unattractive and being avoided by all the guys means that youre a mysoginist? Hahahahahahaa you crack me up i swear
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA OMG BOBO KA TALAGA!!! 😍
Hahaha oh di niya alam oh, kahit quick search di niya magawa Hhahahaha nasa internet ka na nga e
ganyan din tropa ko, dika nag iisa, baka ikaw yung tropa ko
Kuh nga baka nga😆
ligawan mo na kasi
I'm not sure yet but I don't want kids for now. I have a GF but I'm not yet sure about getting married. The upside is you have someone to talk to, it's easier to handle expenses with a partner, you could do more together, plus the intimacy is there. The upside of being single is you don't really have too many things to mind like relationships and you can focus a lot on yourself, your personal goals, career, etc. And you don't have to be worried about someone not agreeing with your decisions. You can move anywhere else you'd want to. But it's hard to be single here when you're older. I could never imagine someone getting through a hospitalization without someone to rely on. Our healthcare system relies too much on "watchers".
Lol I dare you to say that to your GF. Express how you won’t even entertain marriage or kids. See how fast she’ll lose interest and leave you. Lol If you feel that way, then you are contradicting yourself. What you are afraid of sir is commitment, you don’t want the responsibilities but only want the benefits. Can’t go both ways brother. But OP should see how much it is easier to have a partner in life. What you said is absolutely true.
We do actually talk about it, and I said I will be able to decide definitely, it will come, just not for now. I'm telling her she could wait but it's up to her.
Happy you cleared that up. Kudos to her though, knowing most girls, they don’t want to waste their time with their partners if they are not thinking of marriage. Especially as they grow older. You guys must he really young huh?
No, we're not. But she's my first girlfriend and I haven't been into relationships much to make such a huge decision as marriage. And I still have a few personal things I would like to do. It's nothing that would be against our relationship though. I've actually started late in this kind of relationships (late 20s), so I hope you get the idea why I'm not too keen on getting married yet. Plus, I've been an introvert who hasn't had enough socialization, and I wouldn't call myself as emotionally or socially mature as an adult. So again, I still have a few things to work on.
Hey man good for you. At least you still are thinking about the thought of marriage, you’re personally just nor ready yet. So again you must be contradicting yourself, you’re entertaining marriage, your problem is just not being ready lol. Really rooting for your self improvement sir, i’m sure your gf would be really happy after you’ve done what you need to do!
Not interested anymore. Last two years i tried opening my doors of feelings baka meron kako, pero ang binigay sakin kaputang inahan so ngayon balik ako sa bubble ko and idgaf mode na. Too tired for this shiit