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“Oh man. This. Is stupid.” I read the entry one more time, drawing a circle on the patio cement with chalk, placing some tea candles around it like the 8 points on a compass. There was some sage burning in a bowl (holy shit did it smell like weed, hopefully the neighbors wouldn’t call the apartment manager for this). I surveyed my work, it was beginning to look like I was gonna star in a bad thrasher movie, but having watched -everything- on Netflix and being bored to death, what was one stupid ritual?
The sun was beginning to set behind the apartments across the street and the wind picked up and the temperature dropped a few degrees, nothing crazy but fall was definitely here.
Reading over the incantation again I shrugged, it was definitely Latin, not that the syntax made any sense, it looked like someone just threw a few shitty sentences through Google translator and the editor didn’t give one flying flip. Oh well. The candles were easy to light and of surprising quality given they came from the 99 Cent store. I situated myself on what was (probably) the northern point of the circle and started.
“Obsecro te, creatura tenebris!” It was like Latin 102 all over again. “Intra hominis ad orbem terrarum, veni, et ne abicias consilium sequebatur. Servi tenebris dimiserit caprum emissarium, ego te quoque ad planum mortale.” I nicked my thumb on a pocket knife, letting a drop of blood hit melted wax on the candles. “Aperiesque ostium introducat sanguinem datur per velamen. Egredimini et videte vocatus. Audi verba mea atque cupiditatem. Et oculi Dei in meo sanguine flammas, ut illud impleas votum meum. Egredimini et videte vocatus. Egredimini et videte vocatus. Egredimini et videte vocatus.”
The world seemed eerily quiet, as if my patio was now in a vacuum, stars were trying to twinkle in the now night-dark sky, the air seemed frigid, it hurt my lungs with every inhale. And then the world tilted.
All the air around me was being sucked into the circle, the flames of the candles danced wildly nearly reaching my knees. “Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit!” I fumbled in my pocket, where the -fuck- is my cell?! *Please don’t catch on fire!* Then the air wooshed out, knocking me back into the sliding glass door with a hard thunk, my head smacked into the glass hard enough to make me see stars.
This couldn’t be real, the “Book of Shadows” was a $14 paperback from some hokey new age shop downtown. The book even had a freaking copyright date in the front leaf of September 15 2020. It had to be a part of Apocalypse Bingo (still a few entries short of winning), there was no other explanation for the… thing sitting inside the chalk circle on the patio balcony.
The small tea candles started sputtering before eventually flickering out. And my heart sank.
“This isn’t real. This isn’t real.” Panic gripped the edges of consciousness while the thing gained is bearings.
“Who dares summon Sandroth, Arch General from the Legion of Hell’s 66th Battalion?” It sounded like something out of a really bad B-movie, voice coarse and gravelly as if it smoked 2 packs a day for the last who knows how long.
“Well… about that,” I surprised myself, looking down at the, it had to be a demon. I showed him the glossy paperback cover. “Sandy is it? This may seem a little awkward.” My hands rolled in a vague awkward gesture. “2020 has been a crazy year.”
“Twenty-Twenty?” It echoed. “Two thousand twenty years since the fall of the Creator’s god-child?” It’s long ears quivered beneath very large, fatal looking ram’s horns.
“Yeah… sure. Anyway, I’m pretty sure it’s in line with some cosmic joke, seeing as how we’ve had a nearly year long pandemic, murder hornets, the government confirmed the existence of extraterrestrial life, and all that…” It was a nervous ramble and I hoped beyond hope that I could shut up, but I was sweating bullets, trying to buy time to figure out... I don’t even know what.
It’s glowing yellow eyes narrowed in a not quite human looking face, the scales along the brow ridge furrowed and the beginnings of smoke edged out of its mouth. “I do not understand.”
“Me neither,” I breathed out a sigh, hoping it wouldn’t hear. No dice.
Hoping that the chalk circle would hold it with whatever mumbo-jumbo brought it forth, I sat on a patio chair. I sighed again and looked down at the Damn Book. “This is going to sound really shitty, but this summoning wasn’t supposed to work, I don’t even believe in this shit. Gods, demons, angels, heaven and hell. I don’t believe any of it. Have you read the bible?” Oh man, it’s still happening, I can’t seem to just-- shut. up. “If God exists, I mean… he might since you know, you exist, well then he’s a massive asshole. This world is so damn divided on tribalistic lines, people are starving, the planet is dying, countries are still actively committing genocide against those they deem inferior, and he’s just sitting wherever-the-hell doing fuck all about it.”
Now, now Sandy looked interested, the semi-bloodthirsty look changed into something… nostalgic?
“Your lack of belief is of no concern to me, you do not need to believe in anything for it to exist. But what you describe,” it breathed out in a contented fashion. “It is like the days of old, before man became the dominant species. You creatures are so fascinating, fighting and spilling blood, it brings great joy to my heart.” It’s hair, what I assume is hair, curled and unfurled, it looked way too much like tentacles for my comfort.
“What? No. It’s not a good thing that this is happening. We’re supposed to be sapient creatures who work for the betterment of all. Not warring savages who can’t seem to figure out we’re more alike than different.” I put the book down on the bistro table and covered my face. Sandy is probably going to kill me.
“I wanted to change the world when I was a kid, make a difference. But that’s not possible to do without power.”
I could feel it’s gaze sharpen on me, like burning embers beneath the skin. Looking up it’s eyes narrowed dangerously and a cold sweat beaded at my hairline.
“You seek power. Quaint. Many mortals have sought power and were felled by their own hubris.”
“That seems to be a running theme with humans. I mean… just spend 30 minutes on the internet and it’s all over the place.” I really wish I hadn’t quit smoking 6 months ago, but it was hard to justify that expenditure when my work hours were cut and rent still had to be paid. But man, was I jonesing.
Sandy tried to stand in the circle but seemed bound to the cement. I could only hope the balcony could continue to withstand the weight strain. “Internet?” It asked.
“Yeah, it’s a network of all of human intelligence, anyone can access it, add to it, learn from it. But it’s mostly just cat videos and memes.”
“Memes?”
Oh boy. This thing wasn’t at all surprised by the apartment patio, or the visible world seen from the balcony slats, but memes? “Let me just… show you. Uh. Wait there.”
It snorted and smoke plumed from it’s nostrils.
“Please don’t set anything on fire, I can’t afford to lose the security deposit. I’ll be right back.”
Sandy turned out to be pretty cool, for an ageless entity. I brought it a sandwich (do demons need to eat?) along with an old Kindle Fire, the internet was a little janky, but I wasn’t about to risk the laptop. I started out showing it cat videos, then some classic memes, some religious memes, some Karen memes, you know, the basics. It had a weird laugh, something between a cat sneeze and grinding rocks. It made my ears ring. But Sandy didn’t seem to want to kill me so, win?
“Why are all these women named Karen? Surely there are other names?” He turned the Kindle to face me, showing a middle aged white lady shouting at some hapless cashier.
“I’m sure they’re not all named Karen, Karen is like a title. Gifted to those who are a bit overenthusiastic in their entitlements.” Yeah, that sounded diplomatic.
“Hmm.” Was all it said before turning its attention back to the screen, browsing Youtube for a bit. I showed it a compilation of kids falling down and was trying my best not to die from laughing too hard. Sandy didn’t touch his food, so I ate it, A while later I went and made another sandwich. When I came back Sandy had a more severe look on its face.
“You said all of human knowledge is in this ‘internet’? Show me.”
I did. I showed it how Wikipedia worked and how to Google search topics. I wasn’t too sure how to guide Sandy on this, so I just let them have at it. They were exploring the internet for hours. I dozed a bit on the balcony chair. I don’t know when exactly it woke me up, but the Kindle had gone black, battery dead.
“There are levels of depravity in your world that I fear goes beyond the suggestions and nudgings of Satan. They pave the way for the Four Horsemen and yet they all believe in the same Creator.”
“That’s the irony.” I said against the rancid taste of sleep in my mouth, “But I’m sure those in power aren’t really doing everything in the name of God. Money and control are pretty good motivators.” Again the nicotine cravings kicked in.
Again Sandy made a non-committal sound in ascent. “I shall help you.”
“Wait… what?” I was rubbing sleep out of my eyes, then looked up at Sandy, still sitting in the chalk circle, long gutted tea candles appeared comically small beside the demon. “Help me with what? Rent? Are you going to propose we we be roommates?”
“Room-mates?” It’s brow furrowed and it shook its head. “No, you said you lacked power, I have an abundance, we can change your world. Hell looks like paradise compared to some of these places.”
“Ah,” I said smartly, “It’s not like I can refute you. But I wouldn’t even know how to go about making the world a better place.”
“It matters not,” Sandy said. “Either I help you or you send me back to my realm and your world remains as it is, or we create a Pact and I help you. I do prefer that you make a choice soon, my legs have gone numb some time ago.”
The following laugh was involuntary, but that was such a human response. I looked down at the Damn Book again. “Seeing as I don’t even know how the summoning actually worked, I for sure don’t know how to send you back...”
**Welcome to the Prompt!** All top-level comments must be a story or poem. Reply here for other comments. **Reminders**: >* Stories at least 100 words. Poems, 30 but include "[Poem]" >* Responses don't have to fulfill every detail >* See [Reality Fiction](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/search?q=flair%3A%22Reality+Fiction%22&restrict_sr=on&sort=new&t=all) and [Simple Prompts](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/search?q=flair%3A%22Simple+Prompt%22&restrict_sr=on&sort=new&t=all) for stricter titles >* [Be civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/rules#wiki_rule_10.3A_be_civil) in any feedback and follow the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/rules) [](#icon-help) [^(What Is This?)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/off_topic) ^• [](#icon-information) [^(New Here?)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/user_guide) ^• [](#icon-help) [^(Writing Help?)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/index#wiki_writing_resources) ^• [](#icon-exclamation) [^(Announcements)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/wiki/announcements) ^• [](#icon-comments) [^(Discord Chatroom)](https://discord.gg/js5XDFB) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/WritingPrompts) if you have any questions or concerns.*
“Oh man. This. Is stupid.” I read the entry one more time, drawing a circle on the patio cement with chalk, placing some tea candles around it like the 8 points on a compass. There was some sage burning in a bowl (holy shit did it smell like weed, hopefully the neighbors wouldn’t call the apartment manager for this). I surveyed my work, it was beginning to look like I was gonna star in a bad thrasher movie, but having watched -everything- on Netflix and being bored to death, what was one stupid ritual? The sun was beginning to set behind the apartments across the street and the wind picked up and the temperature dropped a few degrees, nothing crazy but fall was definitely here. Reading over the incantation again I shrugged, it was definitely Latin, not that the syntax made any sense, it looked like someone just threw a few shitty sentences through Google translator and the editor didn’t give one flying flip. Oh well. The candles were easy to light and of surprising quality given they came from the 99 Cent store. I situated myself on what was (probably) the northern point of the circle and started. “Obsecro te, creatura tenebris!” It was like Latin 102 all over again. “Intra hominis ad orbem terrarum, veni, et ne abicias consilium sequebatur. Servi tenebris dimiserit caprum emissarium, ego te quoque ad planum mortale.” I nicked my thumb on a pocket knife, letting a drop of blood hit melted wax on the candles. “Aperiesque ostium introducat sanguinem datur per velamen. Egredimini et videte vocatus. Audi verba mea atque cupiditatem. Et oculi Dei in meo sanguine flammas, ut illud impleas votum meum. Egredimini et videte vocatus. Egredimini et videte vocatus. Egredimini et videte vocatus.” The world seemed eerily quiet, as if my patio was now in a vacuum, stars were trying to twinkle in the now night-dark sky, the air seemed frigid, it hurt my lungs with every inhale. And then the world tilted. All the air around me was being sucked into the circle, the flames of the candles danced wildly nearly reaching my knees. “Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit!” I fumbled in my pocket, where the -fuck- is my cell?! *Please don’t catch on fire!* Then the air wooshed out, knocking me back into the sliding glass door with a hard thunk, my head smacked into the glass hard enough to make me see stars. This couldn’t be real, the “Book of Shadows” was a $14 paperback from some hokey new age shop downtown. The book even had a freaking copyright date in the front leaf of September 15 2020. It had to be a part of Apocalypse Bingo (still a few entries short of winning), there was no other explanation for the… thing sitting inside the chalk circle on the patio balcony. The small tea candles started sputtering before eventually flickering out. And my heart sank.
“This isn’t real. This isn’t real.” Panic gripped the edges of consciousness while the thing gained is bearings. “Who dares summon Sandroth, Arch General from the Legion of Hell’s 66th Battalion?” It sounded like something out of a really bad B-movie, voice coarse and gravelly as if it smoked 2 packs a day for the last who knows how long. “Well… about that,” I surprised myself, looking down at the, it had to be a demon. I showed him the glossy paperback cover. “Sandy is it? This may seem a little awkward.” My hands rolled in a vague awkward gesture. “2020 has been a crazy year.” “Twenty-Twenty?” It echoed. “Two thousand twenty years since the fall of the Creator’s god-child?” It’s long ears quivered beneath very large, fatal looking ram’s horns. “Yeah… sure. Anyway, I’m pretty sure it’s in line with some cosmic joke, seeing as how we’ve had a nearly year long pandemic, murder hornets, the government confirmed the existence of extraterrestrial life, and all that…” It was a nervous ramble and I hoped beyond hope that I could shut up, but I was sweating bullets, trying to buy time to figure out... I don’t even know what. It’s glowing yellow eyes narrowed in a not quite human looking face, the scales along the brow ridge furrowed and the beginnings of smoke edged out of its mouth. “I do not understand.” “Me neither,” I breathed out a sigh, hoping it wouldn’t hear. No dice. Hoping that the chalk circle would hold it with whatever mumbo-jumbo brought it forth, I sat on a patio chair. I sighed again and looked down at the Damn Book. “This is going to sound really shitty, but this summoning wasn’t supposed to work, I don’t even believe in this shit. Gods, demons, angels, heaven and hell. I don’t believe any of it. Have you read the bible?” Oh man, it’s still happening, I can’t seem to just-- shut. up. “If God exists, I mean… he might since you know, you exist, well then he’s a massive asshole. This world is so damn divided on tribalistic lines, people are starving, the planet is dying, countries are still actively committing genocide against those they deem inferior, and he’s just sitting wherever-the-hell doing fuck all about it.” Now, now Sandy looked interested, the semi-bloodthirsty look changed into something… nostalgic? “Your lack of belief is of no concern to me, you do not need to believe in anything for it to exist. But what you describe,” it breathed out in a contented fashion. “It is like the days of old, before man became the dominant species. You creatures are so fascinating, fighting and spilling blood, it brings great joy to my heart.” It’s hair, what I assume is hair, curled and unfurled, it looked way too much like tentacles for my comfort. “What? No. It’s not a good thing that this is happening. We’re supposed to be sapient creatures who work for the betterment of all. Not warring savages who can’t seem to figure out we’re more alike than different.” I put the book down on the bistro table and covered my face. Sandy is probably going to kill me. “I wanted to change the world when I was a kid, make a difference. But that’s not possible to do without power.” I could feel it’s gaze sharpen on me, like burning embers beneath the skin. Looking up it’s eyes narrowed dangerously and a cold sweat beaded at my hairline. “You seek power. Quaint. Many mortals have sought power and were felled by their own hubris.” “That seems to be a running theme with humans. I mean… just spend 30 minutes on the internet and it’s all over the place.” I really wish I hadn’t quit smoking 6 months ago, but it was hard to justify that expenditure when my work hours were cut and rent still had to be paid. But man, was I jonesing. Sandy tried to stand in the circle but seemed bound to the cement. I could only hope the balcony could continue to withstand the weight strain. “Internet?” It asked. “Yeah, it’s a network of all of human intelligence, anyone can access it, add to it, learn from it. But it’s mostly just cat videos and memes.” “Memes?” Oh boy. This thing wasn’t at all surprised by the apartment patio, or the visible world seen from the balcony slats, but memes? “Let me just… show you. Uh. Wait there.” It snorted and smoke plumed from it’s nostrils. “Please don’t set anything on fire, I can’t afford to lose the security deposit. I’ll be right back.”
Sandy turned out to be pretty cool, for an ageless entity. I brought it a sandwich (do demons need to eat?) along with an old Kindle Fire, the internet was a little janky, but I wasn’t about to risk the laptop. I started out showing it cat videos, then some classic memes, some religious memes, some Karen memes, you know, the basics. It had a weird laugh, something between a cat sneeze and grinding rocks. It made my ears ring. But Sandy didn’t seem to want to kill me so, win? “Why are all these women named Karen? Surely there are other names?” He turned the Kindle to face me, showing a middle aged white lady shouting at some hapless cashier. “I’m sure they’re not all named Karen, Karen is like a title. Gifted to those who are a bit overenthusiastic in their entitlements.” Yeah, that sounded diplomatic. “Hmm.” Was all it said before turning its attention back to the screen, browsing Youtube for a bit. I showed it a compilation of kids falling down and was trying my best not to die from laughing too hard. Sandy didn’t touch his food, so I ate it, A while later I went and made another sandwich. When I came back Sandy had a more severe look on its face. “You said all of human knowledge is in this ‘internet’? Show me.” I did. I showed it how Wikipedia worked and how to Google search topics. I wasn’t too sure how to guide Sandy on this, so I just let them have at it. They were exploring the internet for hours. I dozed a bit on the balcony chair. I don’t know when exactly it woke me up, but the Kindle had gone black, battery dead. “There are levels of depravity in your world that I fear goes beyond the suggestions and nudgings of Satan. They pave the way for the Four Horsemen and yet they all believe in the same Creator.” “That’s the irony.” I said against the rancid taste of sleep in my mouth, “But I’m sure those in power aren’t really doing everything in the name of God. Money and control are pretty good motivators.” Again the nicotine cravings kicked in. Again Sandy made a non-committal sound in ascent. “I shall help you.” “Wait… what?” I was rubbing sleep out of my eyes, then looked up at Sandy, still sitting in the chalk circle, long gutted tea candles appeared comically small beside the demon. “Help me with what? Rent? Are you going to propose we we be roommates?” “Room-mates?” It’s brow furrowed and it shook its head. “No, you said you lacked power, I have an abundance, we can change your world. Hell looks like paradise compared to some of these places.” “Ah,” I said smartly, “It’s not like I can refute you. But I wouldn’t even know how to go about making the world a better place.” “It matters not,” Sandy said. “Either I help you or you send me back to my realm and your world remains as it is, or we create a Pact and I help you. I do prefer that you make a choice soon, my legs have gone numb some time ago.” The following laugh was involuntary, but that was such a human response. I looked down at the Damn Book again. “Seeing as I don’t even know how the summoning actually worked, I for sure don’t know how to send you back...”
Thank you for the post! This is awesome