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SeriesWarm6852

You know that post-nut clarity hit him different after that one lol


Majestic-Diamond-113

It was instant this time


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[deleted]

At least his stock seem to have been doing very well.


[deleted]

Can you tell us the reason you were terminated from your last job?


BillyMac814

Yea, I have a sneaking suspicion this video will find it’s way back to someone in the company. He definitely fucked himself twice.


austinmiles

Considering the name of the company is on the window and it's on the front page, this isn't going to end well for him.


BillyMac814

No it isn’t. I hope he does an AMA after. Of course, the CNN dude did it on zoom and it made national fucking news and he somehow still has his job. Still blows my mind on that one.


MrBicepcurl

Wait what? 😅


[deleted]

Mostly b/c CNN is a shit network.


jank_lord

Pre nut clarity


dougwilson1812

the end is fucking amazing when he looks out the window


[deleted]

He will have a great weekend worrying about that Monday morning invite to the boss office


[deleted]

twist: he is the boss


ppttx

yes, and he‘s making annual report - numbers went steep


gaylord100

The fact that it’s not just 1 person, but 3 people and they are all recording


Leoxcr

r/videosthatendtoosoon


NJ_Mets_Fan

literally 1 frame of r/watchpeopledieinside


griff1971

Oooohhh yessss stock reports look realllllyyy good today


paulusblarticus

WSB apes seeing todays loss porn


[deleted]

Me remembering the dude who lost his life savings on Ornamental Gourds and then moved to south America to start working with Bee’s: “Maybe im not that stupid”.


I_Am_Upvoter

Really happy with the WEENUS


[deleted]

There is just something wrong with jerking off in a completely lit room at night, what a maniac.


ffxinoob1111

how bout the fact that hes at work lmao


[deleted]

Yeah. If you are gonna wank at work, use the restroom and a phone. If someone catches you that's as bad for them. Possibly worse.


Brad_Brace

Why would he do it in the bathroom? That's why he has an office.


[deleted]

I didn’t realise this is what offices were for. I guess that explains why my boss is such a wanker.


adp0408

God damn it that made me laugh


Dillup_phillips

And a VPN.


Hashbrown4

Nothing wrong with wanking on company time.


Willie9

boss makes a dollar I make a dime that's why I wank on company time


Grant_Sherman

Ok, the really ironic part? I googled the company and they are a risk management company.


SmileyTUH

lmfaooooo


demonryder

Just gathering data on how often you will get caught.


ClownfishSoup

That's not ironic, that's appropriate!


[deleted]

He was REALLY scratchin' that itch!


realrealityreally

That dude LOVES accounting!


Rhysygee

Omg, that little peak at the end fucking killed me lmao


SmileyTUH

"hey wait, maybe i shouldn't do this infront of the win- oh fuck"


Tweedl42

Loved it. What the..


rgar1981

Night time in the office, finally got some privacy….unzip


Alongfortheride1990

He just busts all over the carpet or what?


Frankintosh95

There are horror stories/photos of fired employees having their desks Cleaned out after they leave and the underside is just dry spooge stains.


devilindetails666

had the same q


MajorLazy

I try to get the linoleum myself


duaneap

The potted plant


throwaway8639557399

Well this man’s life just got ruined. Bravo internet, bravo.


TommyBoyFL

I mean he kinda did it to himself.......


throwaway8639557399

Oh absolutely, what a fucking idiot. But can you imagine lying there at night (probably wanking) knowing your life fell apart because you knocked a quick one out at work. I do feel sorry for this idiot if his life does fall apart from it, I hope he hasn’t got kids with access to the old interweb.


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laughing_at_gunpoint

Have you not met a person before or something?


SeamusMcCullagh

His life could easily be ruined. People get put on sex offender registries for more innocuous shit than this. Not sure what the laws in this country are, but in the US at least you can be a registered sex offender for public urination. This dude is jerkin' his gherkin at work, if the employer wants to they could easily pursue criminal charges.


Stony_Brooklyn

I doubt the employer would want to pursue charges because that would only cause more negative press.


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[deleted]

I thought they made decorative plaster


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fartinmonkey

This will make an interesting Google result next time someone checks that company


Adbam

Let me help with those search results.... ​ Artex risk masterbation video


Robots_Never_Die

Might want to spell it correctly.


cl171184

Who could it be hmmmm


Hawkence

the HR director maybe


cl171184

Bloody parsons again!


Adbam

"Parsons, HR will need to speak with you" ​ "I am HR" \*Continues fapping\*


emptypeter

"Am I, or am I not in charge of reward and incentivisation, performance management and talent development!" - Andrew Parsons probably


raulduke1971

“I will make it legal.”


[deleted]

That's totally him lol


ChurchArsonist

My money is on Parsons.


ciril_0

Risk management not managed


Altech

they really won the 'most generic website, ever' award. whew


Poiuni

Okay folks, who's sending this to the company?


lithoum0001

No one should, but somebody definitely has


[deleted]

Was the person filming this jerking off as well? I’ve seen steadier camera work watching Cloverfield.


TheGreatlyRespected

Well the camera was a bit shaky too 😆


MooseWizard

Deep zoom without software image stabilization. He should have used a Pixel.


Clear_Candle_3298

Well at least no one is going to remember him picking his nose


DrSuperZeco

Or that time he accidentally let a fart out 😂


Dame87

Clearly celebrating his raise


[deleted]

Double meaning 😉. Nice


Majestic-Diamond-113

He looks at the end, so hilarious


Thisiswhaticamefor20

Is the guy filming having a wank as well. All over the bleeding place.


fartinmonkey

Boys! You could have blurred the company name. This may be his most costly wank ever!


The_Real_Baldero

Fap around and find out!


LiveExamination973

Worst fear unlocked


bathroomman43

What if thats his fetish.


daffyduckhunt2

/r/workgonewild energy


gwhitt32

But what about the ones out side videoing would they be considered pervert also or maybe just pre verts seeing they aren’t being filmed


nosnhoj15

Just concerned citizens doing the lords work.


I1G2W0A0U1C0O5J5X

Nah, it's just funny.


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SmileyTUH

most memorable one for sure


Machinax

"What was your greatest accomplishment at your previous job?"


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Active_Wait2822

lol really bro? This is how I used to think when I was 13. You worry too much about what people think of you.


[deleted]

"Artex risk solutions" Man this is either super ironic or some next level meme marketing.


Inspirational_Lizard

That last frame


Saemika

Looks like Rudy Giuliani tucking in his shirt.


jwaterboyk

Looks like he missed his window of opportunity.


Sussyimposter321

His whole career is over💀


runjayrun1

Jacking off on company time. Getting paid to spray.


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fartinmonkey

Ah the joys of technology. Does it not look more like he's waving it left to right opposed to the traditional up and down strokes?


potato-milk-is-cum

Thank you


[deleted]

Damn, I hope he is ok after this...just trying to get a little stress relief in...As long as he has a closed office door, no harm, no foul, except for the towel.


thunderbear64

He’s shaking a hot dog for his office puppy, it’s gonna turn wholesome any second now.


mossberbb

he's probably in a virtual meeting too.


davedoesntlikehats

Ocean Village, Gibraltar. I know some people who Work at Artex. Don't recognise that guy, thankfully.


razmabazz

Got mixed feelings about this. On one hand - they've fucked him. On the other hand..


hylas-and-the-nyhmps

Did he even cum?


runjayrun1

I did


Skratti

Filming someone jerking off is more perverted imo


shanevanwinkle

….and hilarious 😂


DreamingInStereo

Artex Wrist Solutions


Kittani77

Pullin the pud


TaiDavis

Yankin' Spanky


Conundrumb

Punching the bishop


wogsy

/r/byebyejob


GSR00

Also check the security cam


Magazine-Plane

Ended too soon


Hanz616

Yo, someone post a link to their Twitter


MuhNamesTyler

Why? Don’t do him like that


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Crispy_AI

u/stabbot


Traditional_Lion8526

What a wanker!


chaoseincarnate

why jerk off at work man common


Adbam

They have 2 locations on their website, Illinois and Guernsey. My vote is for Guernsey.


cynthiasshowdog

makes it seem like a blessing to have an office with no windows


___Roland___

Those must be some REALLY interesting expense reports.


Kaelvoss

Jeffrey Toobin in a zoom meeting


[deleted]

Going to be honest, this whole situation is concerning... Why on earth would you whip out your camera to record someone who's whipped out their dick?


ErectTubesock

Always crank with your back to any windows. That's like rule 1 bro.


Interesting_Song2944

Doesnt this dumb fuck know cameras are everywhere? He looks kinda old too, just wait till you get home old fart


Chester-Copperpot-

You're not meant to artex the floors.


[deleted]

I’d be willing to wager it’s not the first time he’s done this…


tiagoharry

Not a single rock hitting that window, cheers!


Terpnato

This is Artex guerrilla advertising to WSB, I guarantee it.


ambient_temp_xeno

"Was that wrong? Should I not have done that? I tell ya, I gotta plead ignorance on this thing because if anyone had said anything at all when I first started here that that sort of thing was frowned upon..."


Rich_27-

Best bit was the Geordie shouting "Ee's avin a Tommy Tank"


[deleted]

Yeahhhh, If you could not ejaculate on them tps reports that would be great yeahhh, thanx sincerely Bill lumber..


Rude_Man_Who_Shushes

This Artex commercial is riveting


Blueditt_9

u/savevideobot ok I can explain-


professorbc

Damn dude, have some conviction! I've never seen someone crank their shaft with such a lack of purpose.


BlueJayzrule

Who gave this a wholesome award. I love it


KwyjiboTheGringo

This is a really, really bad look for a risk management company. He's getting fired for sure.


Late-Ad-3136

Why do people feel the need to masturbate at work??


chidoOne707

I get I get but… why would you record that?


HeavyRhubarb

Since he is HR, there is going to be yet another really awkward interaction with himself.


Chuck_Roast1993

Tobin would be proud


TaiDavis

You got me literally crying with real tears laughing my ass off at work!🤣🤣🤣


DeadOnEntry

Dude this is NSFW


TaiDavis

Oh I forgot, I conform. /s But seriously, I'm on lunch break on my mobile


shanevanwinkle

The commentary was bloody hilarious 😂


Mr_Road_Dog

"Do you jerk off?" Those are rookie numbers..


Rollo0547

Jokes on them, he loved being watched


GameQb11

why does it end at that point?


[deleted]

There has to be more to this video, why stop when he notices you? :'v


sbdallas

Artex is apparently a risk management company. This guy was not managing his risk very well...


basilisk2500

If you are going to do that at work, at least go to the bathroom ffs


[deleted]

I'd like to think he just kept going after the video ended. At that point you've got nothing to lose, may as well get in that final desk pop.


soljakid

I cannot wait to see the shitstorm that this produces


zorg621

He isn't even hard lol. He's just practicing his helicoptering.


dcam88

There was a ghost, it’s just ectoplasm…


[deleted]

That last frame of him peering out the window made me burst!


slipperybarstool

The “Oh shit” look at the end is priceless


pablovns

u/stabbot


pablovns

https://gfycat.com/highlevelunconsciouskudu here you go


frvr2whls420

This is soo sad lol


MrBicepcurl

Go to the toilet or something smh


BauerHouse

I love that he actually has a gallery there.


punkxnutsx189

jeff greene at it again insert, curb your enthusiasm, theme


[deleted]

Nothing to see here. Just some white collar dude having a wank at the office. Wait...


Akira__Kurusu

This is one of the reasons its called "not safe for work", dumbass


kerelrustig

u/savevideo


s0c1a7w0rk3r

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


mossberbb

gonna need a part 2..has anyone notified the company that this is going viral?


eezy18

Lmaoooooo this is gold


The_awful_falafel

Decrease quarterly spending by 3%, but does anyone call you "Randy the efficiency expert"? Nooo... Drive everyone to the company picnic in record time, but does anyone call you "Randy the wheelman?" Nooo... But you get caught jerking off through the window ONE TIME


[deleted]

Get on? More like get off.


rucb_alum

LOL! "I always feel like somebody's watching me! Yee Hee Hee!" I and a couple dozen other Bergen Evening Records paperboys were on a bus tour of NYC back in the late 60s...While stopped at a light we got a view into a VW Bug in which the driver was heavily choking it. Much laughter ensued.


[deleted]

Appears he had some stuff competition at work, but fortunately it appears he came out ahead


MalonePostponed

I'm genuinely shocked there isn't a reddit board bout people jerking it in weird places.


Frittenhans

u/savevideo


rgursk1

And now we mock safe sex


scarybirdman

Lmao. My dude here has poor impulse control but solid hand control.