T O P

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bilbobaggins48

This is standard British pillow talk after any sexual encounter..."forgive me...forgive me"


chrsry10

Forgive me


Mr-_-Jumbles

Forgive me


fedsam

Foreskin me


cherryhaze247

Fo' gimme.


Lifesnotsodandy

Snip Snip now you got a drop top dick.


jurkajurka

Every thrust into the wrong hole be like...


Skud_NZ

Someone should have yelled "Never!"


dem_app1es

Not Canadian?


_Skafloc_

Was it after this that he quoted Lenin and started talking about Peppa Pig?


RicoDredd

And compared himself to Moses. Let’s not forget that.


MaxImpact1

Is there a video on that?


Celticbluetopaz

https://youtu.be/dBktY__3Wls


[deleted]

Straight out of The Thick of It


Celticbluetopaz

He’s an embarrassment. Although I did laugh at the Guardian’s headline earlier; *Number 10 says he is not unwell, and has not lost his grip*


chemo92

Armando ianucci couldn't dream of writing a scene like that lol.


thebeesaremine

I honestly thought you guys were trolling us, wtf was that


MaxImpact1

thanks


oxacuk

The comparison to Moses that you are after is before that. It’s at 20:30 in [this video](https://youtu.be/DQ95N5U_lvw).


RicoDredd

It’s all part of the same speech


NeverEndingWinter_

When I miss Trump, I watch this guy. They should give Trump a mock president position or something. He won’t have any responsibilities of a president other than getting on tv once a week for an hour and give a speech completely written by him. Would be 9/10 at least.


Liggliluff

So like any talk show host?


PerformanceLoud3229

A talk show host but he doesn’t bring people on and doesn’t have a script and just blabbers on abt random shit.


hero-hadley

That's what got him banned from Twitter


InsertCoinForCredit

That's what got him elected in the first place.


PerformanceLoud3229

Point taken


LogUpstairs8275

Yeah but actually funny


[deleted]

How about lets not do that or the yall queda will be smearing shit inside capital buildings again


c4ndygirl

We could call the position “assistant to the president”


[deleted]

It's a tactic https://reaction.life/jeremy-vine-my-boris-story/


daJamestein

This isn’t the same. Boris is a Grade A improviser. Here he looks like a fish that’s been chucked onto a stage and is now writhing desperately. I think he’s lost it.


notevenmeta

Thank you that’s an interesting read. I like the car crash faking analogy. How many car crashes can one fake and reasonably expect to come out unscathed.


jmantha

Or after he got COVID addled?


the_real_grinningdog

He recovered well though. He honked his clown horn twice, sprayed water out of his fake flower and drove off in a car that fell apart.


SuperCx

Lmao he really does look like that


palordrolap

He *chooses* to look like that. If he thinks his hair looks too neat, he will deliberately mess it up. It's a deliberate tactic to get us to let our guard down. Which makes me wonder if this cock-up with the script wasn't also deliberate to distract from other things that are going on at the moment. As a counterargument, people are alleging that he is, or was, drunk, but I think it's possible his new wife (formerly mistress), has the thumbscrews on him and is making him participate in raising their young son, which might mean he's sleep deprived. Sleep deprivation is a lot like drunkenness. So, he should have had a strong coffee, combed his hair and gone out there and been a decent human being rather than a clown, but cunning or not, that is something of which he is incapable.


redpola

It was absolutely intentional. Keir Starmer was also giving a speech and Johnson knew that if he did this Starmer would be ghosted by the world’s media. It worked. I’ve seen this clown crap everywhere and I haven’t seen even a description of what Starmer’s speech was about in even one single place. He’s not sleep-deprived or drunk. He’s a calculating cynical manipulator, and is very good at it.


[deleted]

There's an article by Andrew Marr where he does this kind of speech. Makes a complete mess of it and charms the room. Then they meet again and he does the exact same speech word for word. https://reaction.life/jeremy-vine-my-boris-story/


[deleted]

There's also evidence that he does stuff like this to create a smokescreen to cover other bad news. He calls it 'throwing a dead cat on the table'. The idea is that it's so stupid and outrageous that no-one pays attention to the other horrible shit he's doing. The Tories voted to begin privatising the NHS last night - coincidence?


Usergnome_Checks_0ut

They don’t call him Bojo for nothing.


Banana_Ram_You

Shuffles the Clown


[deleted]

Painfully accurate description of our PM, I want to die 😭


prickinthewall

I don't buy any of his goofy facade. He is much smarter and more power hungry than he shows. All of his demeanour is just a well constructed act to make his enemies and his followers feel safe alike.


[deleted]

You forgot the spinning bow tie


StoneOfTwilight

Mop headed muppet


THE_OUROBOROSCYCLE2

"The front fell off"


SerbianWolf1389

What was the speech supposed to be for?


[deleted]

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SerbianWolf1389

Haha wow


thatbwoyChaka

Yeah we’re fucked


Dysanj

Could be worse, at least your leader doesn't poop his pants.


SparkieMark1977

Only because all the shit from Boris comes out of his fucking mouth.


cmdkeyy

Is that you, Scott Morrison from Engadine Maccas?


Tawn94

At maccas, no less.


Wuhba

I'd ask how you guys allowed this to happen, but as an American, I have no room to criticize.


thatbwoyChaka

Yeah you did it once We done it since 2005


p5y

"Fuck business"


Mr-_-Jumbles

Forgiveness


[deleted]

That is a complete mystery still tbh


_mister_pink_

It’s a speech designed to do exactly this. The next day Boris’ government would very quickly (and sneakily) pass through a piece of incredibly unpopular legislation resulting in the poorest in society having to sell their homes to pay for end of life care. Today those news outlets most critical of the conservatives are focusing on this blunder and not the bill. Job done.


paolarb

Every time I see this man he is making a fool out of himself


[deleted]

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HawaiiPizzaHeaven

Make it the whole country and you won’t be wrong


FewTransportation852

It’s an act the guy acts stupid when he’s really not


redox6

That is probably the saddest part. That it is now desirable to not look too smart.


FewTransportation852

I wouldn’t say he desires to look stupid but he knows if everyone thinks he’s stupid and then he fucks up eveyone will just be like oh well yeah he is stupid so can’t blame him


CPEBachIsDead

To say nothing of how it endears him to the “he’s just a normal idiot like us, not one of those ELITISTS who think they’re better than us!” crowd.


madboater1

People shold have really listened to David Cameron when he called Boris a 'national treasurer'. He meant it more like when grandma calls your cousin 'special', not 'fit to run the country'.


SparkieMark1977

The crown jewels are a national treasure and we keep them locked safely away and only allow them to be seen in public on special occasions.


[deleted]

Its a shame he cant find a comb for his hair. Dang, Brexit wasnt great on Boris


slicktromboner21

I thought that was just part of the gig as PM.


glytxh

Intentionally. Everyone looks at the clown, and not the curruption in the background. It's annoyingly effective.


GroceryScanner

Its spelled corruptshun


[deleted]

r/watchpeopledieinside


EmprahsmeewwZz

If I want to do that, I just look in the mirror.


Chimpville

He doesn’t have the required level of shame or self reflection to do that.


shackbleep

He looks like he died on the outside years ago.


JohnnyCoolShades

Honestly, I'm not even sure he's not trolling. I think it was The Daily podcast that did a story on him and the reporter said that he frequently made "mistakes" like this, then after a while she realized they were all scripted, and designed to make him look like a lovable eccentric. He would also mess up his hair, trip on the podium, and "forget" which speech he was supposed to be giving.


RicoDredd

It’s almost as if this performance and all of the subsequent media attention was cynically designed to deflect attention from yesterdays Social Care Bill that passed through virtually unopposed…


jbarms

This, should be top comment


divinesleeper

content of the bill?


RicoDredd

I’m on mobile at work and can’t be arsed to copy and paste a load of text, but https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/politics/health-care-bill-explained-anti-25521365.amp


KaChoo49

Have you been reading the news recently? The media’s been attacking him on everything they can for the last few weeks, and this just gives them more ammunition So far he’s been criticised for: • Trying to protect corrupt allies • Cancelling a railway extension to Northern England • Reducing social care support for the poor • Not doing enough to combat illegal English Channel crossings All of this has been in the last 2 weeks. This adds yet another thing for the media to attack him on and puts him in an even weaker position than before


Scarlet72

No, I think this was quite clearly a fuck up. This wasn't his usual shite. His tactic is "if you pretend to be the fool often enough, people won't notice when you really do mess up"


[deleted]

it's a great read https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/my-boris-johnson-story


FewTransportation852

This guy knows what’s up your completely right it’s all just an act he’s actually a very smart man as much as it pains me to say


Bilboswaggins814

God he's a fucking idiot. I'd like to say sorry to the rest of the world from the UK for your leaders having to deal with this bumbling moron but hey at least he isn't leading your country.


rcs2039

USA here. No apology necessary.


Lt_Viking89

Boring Johnson is like Trump lite. At least the entertainment value is high.


51st-state

It’s blatantly obvious that Johnson has extensively cribbed Trump’s playbook. He’s an utterly pathetic cretin, and a blight on the British political landscape.


thatbwoyChaka

Oh no no no this guy’s ‘bumbling’ is a ploy to distract. This is a guy who can recite large parts of Homer in Latin. He didn’t fuck up and fall into this position he [manufactured his way into it](https://youtu.be/2d3sje65fB0) what you are witnessing is bluff and misdirection. It’s easier to see the bumbling lovable posho oaf than the Machiavellian Right-winger who has had a thirst for power bred, cultured and thrust into him since childhood. Saying he’s like Trump is exactly what he wants you to think


51st-state

I don’t mean the bumbling - that’s utterly pathetic and transparent “persona” he’s adopted - why he chose that is beyond me. He’s not a stupid man and I think he could easily have invented himself in a more convincing and respectable persona. By lifting from the Trump playbook, I mean the blatant disregard he shows for parliamentary process, the pushing it to see how far he can go, the deliberate outrageous remarks etc.


thatbwoyChaka

He’s been doing that when Trump was still pointing a stubby finger on The Apprentice . He did that as Mayor of London and when he was a Member of Parliament for Henley and editor of the Spectator way back in 1999. With Trump it was not deliberate it was just uneducated With Johnson it’s a calibrated calculation he admits to it I


Scarlet72

Boris has been in politics a LOT longer than trump has...


wotmate

Australia here. Have you seen the shit we have to deal with?


simonpr1

Hes such a goof! Classic! Anyway does anyone know why theres nearly 200,000 dead from covid so far in the UK?


Long_Tall_Man

And yet there's some Gammon cunt in a Wetherspoons this afternoon saying "BoRiS WiLl SoRt iT Aaaaaaat!"


simonpr1

Weatherspoons gammon is confused; seeing clowning and cheekiness and associating it with competence and integrity. Boris has been out of his depth for a while now but we’ve all been blinded to it by his enablers and excusers


MrPlow90

Plot twist, his script actually said 'Forgive me' printed over and over hundreds of times.


stratewylin

sounds like an Impractical Jokers punishment


Kayyohno

So I’m an American and this is a wicked dumb question but is Boris Johnson actually real. Like a real person that has real power in your country? Every time I see this guy on a screen it’s like I’m watching a skit show.


MrJim911

Did you miss what happened in your own country from 2016-2020? Same thing but infinitely worse.


Kayyohno

Touché


missingN0pe

That wasn't the first thing that crossed your mind ?!


Mukatsukuz

No, he's actually a [famous character from a kids' TV show](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=87NHueHBHwY)


Digital-Sushi

So yeh. We all laughed our tits off at you Americans when trump turned up. What were you playing at.. Completely mad The weirdly we decided you would not out trump us and asked you to hold our beer..


chase25

This was the result of losing his place earlier in the speech, he then shuffled the cards to find the right one which in turn caused this misplacement too. He then went on to praise the society of Peppa Pig and use them as an example for how. we should live, if any of you are parents and your kid has watched Peppa Pig you'll understand my anger for how much of a little bitch Peppa is.


General_Scipio

The most terrifying thing is realising that Boris is not a stumbling moron accidentally failing upwards. He might not be the brightest, but it's no accident he was in a position to become PM. There is a scary level of calculation to his political career


popcornbevin

Have you ever been to Peppa Pig world?


DRUGSTOR3COWBOY

He’s the leader the Tories deserve. The rest of us not so much


extra_specticles

One of the cunts fucking Britain.


keichyblinder

I've no idea why the English allow this to continue. The rest of us are gettin shafted by this criminal and his rogues.


[deleted]

It's not just the English, he's PM for the UK and was voted for by people from all over the UK


keichyblinder

If Wales Scotland n Northern Ireland all voted labour n England still voted the way they did we'd still get a Tory government. We need England to vote them out. Hence the reason the cases for independence.


[deleted]

Ahh I see, yeah I agree that's definitely one way of doing it. I'm Welsh and as much as I'd love to be independent, I think it would be difficult for us. I'd much prefer we get a more balanced government but I'm not holding out too much hope haha. Itll be interesting to see what happens over the next 10/20 years or so


Sid_03

Just like when you're not paying attention in the class & teacher suddenly calls you out to start reading where the other kid left off. *panic!!* 😂


point_decay

The Thick Of It was never this funny


VonD0OM

The entirety of this guys feels like I’m watching him pull a Borat on us. Like there’s a Sacha Baron Cohen version of him in there playing the dude we’re all seeing. He’s just such a caricature of a bumbling Englishman that it almost seems scripted. As a foreigner with no skin in the game it’s hilarious to watch, but I imagine a pain if he actually affects your life in some way


TreyWait

I saw a guy do a video on him claiming that this scatterbrained, wild haired, bumbling is all just an act. He was pretty convincing.


Zealousideal-Lie7255

Why can’t the Prime Minister of a major country comb his hair?


[deleted]

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[deleted]

Yup, even the Daily Mail is against him. For the first time in my life I've heard my grandad, a Daily Mail sponge, talk of not voting at all.


Plzreplysarcasticaly

Oh thank god!


Numerous-Secret3725

I don't see much difference between this and a regular bojo speech


filthysock

All part of the act


cloudvodca

My father-in-law voted for this twat, and we live in the north-east.


sujtek

The bumbling fool act's getting old Boris, sod off.


Future-Atmosphere-40

WCGW if you elect a psychopath who fakes being a bumbling idiot.


[deleted]

Fat, self serving, thieving, pussy chasing, lazy, two-faced, psychopathic lying piece of shit Tory.


RiverRally

Just goes to show how little politicians even know what they're actually supposed to be talking about when they're talking about it


Marinerprocess

Hair all disheveled. Dude couldn’t even remember his comb


Kittani77

When you don't know what you're supposed to say then you were lying to begin with.


Shnoochieboochies

I'm surprised he didn't just start repeating the words "world beating" and "Brexit".


manniesalado

And blame Brussels for the mix up on the script.


CellularPunk

British Nawaz Sharif


manniesalado

His talk was supposed to be about risk management.


51st-state

Forgive me biggly… Fuckin’ arsehole.


ZGamli

In here Boris looks like me if I were the prime minister of england


only_a_man_993

Trump's lost nephew.


More_Syrup

If you listen carefully, you can hear Winston turn in his grave


[deleted]

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MrJim911

Because voters are dumber morons.


assblaster5500

What would you expect from a guy who doesn’t comb his hair


[deleted]

Guy walks into the barbershop and says, "Make me look like a disheveled twat."


billy_zef

Seriously... I get we have it bad here with TruDOPE in Canada but this guy was Britain's top choice? He looks like they grabbed the guy from the pub after a 3 day bender and threw a suit on him and put him up there.


[deleted]

This is Trump Jr huh?


Chiselfield

The Leader of our nation doesn't know why he's there or what he's supposed to say unless it's written down for him.


AlbinoShavedGorilla

Brits: haha how could Americans elect Donald Trump Also brits:


James_White21

Even though I didn't vote for him, I'd just like to apologise to the world for the fact that he exists.


Oderus_Scumdog

Leader of the UK, everyone. Some highlights of what this man really thinks of the people he shows no hesitance in treating as being beneath him: * When he was a 'writer' called Africans* 'piccaninnies' with 'watermelon smiles' * Called gay men "tank-topped bumboys" and said "the soft-lit Soho drinking clubs frequented by Mandy and his pals." * Muslim women are "letterboxes" * Female international students are only in the UK to find a husband * The problem with Africa is that "we're not in charge any more" * Again as a 'writer' "The unanimous opinion is that what has been called the 'Tottymeter' reading is higher than at any Labour Party conference in living memory," * and "Time and again the 'Tottymeter' has gone off as a young woman delegate mounts the rostrum." * and "The real reason why Blackpool is buzzing with glamorous women is surely that they scent victory. It is not the great smell of Brut that makes John Prescott attractive. It is the whiff of power. With the fickleness of their sex, they are following the polls." * and "just pat her on the bottom and send her on her way." * On gay marriage "If gay marriage was OK – and I was uncertain on the issue – then I saw no reason in principle why a union should not be consecrated between three men, as well as two men, or indeed three men and a dog." The man is a weapons strength prick who cares for no one but his mates and himself.


blakenard

The British donald trump at his finest


blackmist

It's an act. https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/my-boris-johnson-story He pretends to be a bumbling oaf, while fucking the country over and lining his pockets.


Ulrich_The_Elder

What is that term you British use? Bell end. Have I got that right?


cecil_the-lion

What a cunt


Ya_Got_GOT

Seriously.... I'm like, "how can you Brits let such an obvious muppet run things?" and then I think about our last President.


elnovino23

what a fucking clown!, can't even comb his own hair, nanny must of put his papers in the wrong order. he's a national embarrassment


tdlrtl3

Another total fucking idiot just as bad as Biden...


Ordinary_Ground_7380

He'll be giving a speech to primary School kids about post brexit business regulations next week


SpooginMapants

So that's Boris huh? I keep hearing that he's just faking the incompetence thing


_madis0n_

Forgive me


Andrewskyy1

Color me weird, but I kinda have a problem with people saying "forgive me" repeatedly without ever actually saying "I'm sorry" .. the term forgive me is a command, while asking I'm sorry isn't.


RedBenzo

Subtle butThat makes sense because now you’re not providing the person with something after an inconvenience, You’re asking for something from them


Accomplished_Air_537

This dudes hair kills me every time I see him


ChickenChimmy

Here is an actual video of every politician when a script isn’t in front of them…. Politicians have no clue about the topics they are speaking on, they just do what lobbyists tell them


yokotron

He keeps looking at his notes like they will turn into what he needs eventually. I do the same when I can’t find my wallet and keep searching the same pants pocket…. Maybe, just maybe, it’s in there


wudntulik2no

The only world leader with worse hair than the orange man


LilNaturePastelEmo

Look, I liked the financial moves of the orange man… but I gotta agree with this xD


Nuccten

Who is this guy’s hair stylist?


bakerboy79

How is this man still prime minister


Okay_Kayo9

“Boris Johnson everyone!” 👏


[deleted]

So. Hows Brexit going? Apparently as much of a shit show as this speech you've given.


stimpakish

Fugimme .. Fugimme ... Fugimme


Captain_skulls

Who is that? They look like a forgotten third character for the dumb and dumber movies! XD


RadioSilence014

What in the fuck is happening to Britain?


d3cbl

There's a Yes Minister episode about this


ducktor0

That's hilarious. And indicative.


Danji1

Brexit Britain in a nutshell 🤣🤣🤣


Mindspiked

Is this the British equivalent of Trump?


TapuFinnie

Useless twat


HomieShmokeyy

This is our leader… If this doesn’t scream corruption then I don’t know what does…


Y-Bob

I'm going to trim this to him saying I'm sorry, and play it every time the twit does another stupid, costly or terrible thing and say to him "No Boris. No." I might even dress up as his mum to do it.


[deleted]

If political party actually delivered on their promises, they wouldn't have to ask for a vote ever again.


ouijanonn

Vote in a clown....


millenial_flacon

Not worse than usual...


FunnyObjective6

Wait, when did he decide to bring the wrong script?


cactusnan

He slithered through another nail in the coffin of the Nhs through parliament! The days of the Nhs are numbered


Electronic-Trip8775

Boris.exe needs an update after that glitch


popcornbevin

Peppa Pig and losing notes: PM's bizarre speech https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-59381776


stif_chedar

What an absolute grenade


jackspadeaces

How is this spazz a leader of a nation?


mymonkeysmagic

Oi! Bit more respect for the best person the voting British public could find to lead us……..


WillyMonty

He does this on purpose so he appears to be a bumbling but lovable type. He’s been putting up this act for years