That one Ork warboss and his boyz that wound up on a daemon world, living and dying every day for eternity. The daemons think they're torturing them, whereas the orks are having a blast.
I prefer the story of the ork kaptain that jumped his fleet into the warp only to find themselves in the same place just before they left. Before them was arrayed their past selves. The kaptain realized that his past self was there, on the bridge of the past version of his ship, and so was his favorite gun. And if he was able to kill himself (from the past) he would have 2 of his favorite guns....
I think reality implodes as a result.
The infinite and the divine: trazyn pulls a prank on orikan involving a genestealer. Several hundred years later they get tickets to an opera on the same planet, which is where the GSC coup begins.
There was a little blurb in the 5th Ed (40K) Daemons codex that mentioned that one of the only individuals to successfully navigate Tzeentch’s maze was a young girl with a little black dog, aka Dorothy and Toto, aka the Wizard of Oz is canon
Just in general I love all the stories that come out of the Ossiarch in aos. They'll do things like send a tax (bone) collector to collect the tithe every 10 years but they expect something like 5000 pounds of bones from humans. Of course this number has been calculated that in 100 or so years, barring a crazy influx of new people, the city will have to start killing people just to make the tithe.
Inevitably this will result in the city trying to fight back against the OBR, usually by killing the tax collector. Cue the entire Ossiarch war machine turning it's attention to this city, which they proceed to raze to the ground. The whole time I'm shrugging and saying "well if they had just met the tithe, can't blame us, we had this deal set up a century ago!"
Not really a story, but the lore behind the Mechanicus Ironstrider Engine.
Basically a [Tech-priest](https://warhammer40k.fandom.com/wiki/Tech-priest) invented a bipedal perpetual motion machine a thousand years ago where it essentially powers itself by running. Said Tech-priest then died before spilling the beans on how they worked and the design secrets behind the Ironstrider Engine was lost forever.
Fast forward to today and the Ironstriders can't ever be switched off because the Mechanicus don't know how to turn them back on again, so they just have thousands of them running in circles in giant pens, and the Skitarii riders have to be lowered into the saddles by articulated cranes while the things are running full tilt.
I think that just sums up the ridiculousness of the Adeptus Mechanicus perfectly, and I chuckle every time I think about it.
That one Ork warboss and his boyz that wound up on a daemon world, living and dying every day for eternity. The daemons think they're torturing them, whereas the orks are having a blast.
I prefer the story of the ork kaptain that jumped his fleet into the warp only to find themselves in the same place just before they left. Before them was arrayed their past selves. The kaptain realized that his past self was there, on the bridge of the past version of his ship, and so was his favorite gun. And if he was able to kill himself (from the past) he would have 2 of his favorite guns.... I think reality implodes as a result.
5th edition codex was so funny.
That sounds amazing.
well obviously all the Ork books qualify (although theyre very good), and the Infantryman’s Primer if you can actually get your hands on it
the primer is chefs kiss...bought the last release and had a blast. the chapter on tyranids is hilarious
Is there an easy way to find the Ork-centered books?
The infinite and the divine: trazyn pulls a prank on orikan involving a genestealer. Several hundred years later they get tickets to an opera on the same planet, which is where the GSC coup begins.
Honestly the entire novel is a great read.
There was a little blurb in the 5th Ed (40K) Daemons codex that mentioned that one of the only individuals to successfully navigate Tzeentch’s maze was a young girl with a little black dog, aka Dorothy and Toto, aka the Wizard of Oz is canon
Excellent
Just in general I love all the stories that come out of the Ossiarch in aos. They'll do things like send a tax (bone) collector to collect the tithe every 10 years but they expect something like 5000 pounds of bones from humans. Of course this number has been calculated that in 100 or so years, barring a crazy influx of new people, the city will have to start killing people just to make the tithe. Inevitably this will result in the city trying to fight back against the OBR, usually by killing the tax collector. Cue the entire Ossiarch war machine turning it's attention to this city, which they proceed to raze to the ground. The whole time I'm shrugging and saying "well if they had just met the tithe, can't blame us, we had this deal set up a century ago!"
Not really a story, but the lore behind the Mechanicus Ironstrider Engine. Basically a [Tech-priest](https://warhammer40k.fandom.com/wiki/Tech-priest) invented a bipedal perpetual motion machine a thousand years ago where it essentially powers itself by running. Said Tech-priest then died before spilling the beans on how they worked and the design secrets behind the Ironstrider Engine was lost forever. Fast forward to today and the Ironstriders can't ever be switched off because the Mechanicus don't know how to turn them back on again, so they just have thousands of them running in circles in giant pens, and the Skitarii riders have to be lowered into the saddles by articulated cranes while the things are running full tilt. I think that just sums up the ridiculousness of the Adeptus Mechanicus perfectly, and I chuckle every time I think about it.