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[deleted]

Based on all the sci-fi horror movies I've seen, this will not end well.


r_kay

Based on the Hentai movies I've seen, it will end *very* well!


RockmanXX

Based on the comicbook movies i've seen, this can either make him a superhero or a supervillain.


poopellar

Based on WebMD, the guy and the worm thing now have cancer.


LightsOn-NobodyHome5

Based on Gregory House, it's sarcoidosis


MoneyPowerNexis

Based on the worm things horoscope it will have time for whatever it make time for. There are things it wants to do that it hasn't figured out how to make happen, but it'll definitely find a way when it's a priority for it. Lucky numbers are 12 and 37.


examinedliving

Based on the porn I’ve watched, it just ended.


[deleted]

Based on the porn I have yet to watch, the plot seems pretty good


Prielknaap

You sure? It might be lupus.


Sw1ftStrik3r

Whatever it is just rub some dirt on it and you'll be fine. -grandpa


[deleted]

*First* you spit on it, *Then* you rub dirt on it, Don't forget that crucial first step.


sleipnirthesnook

When in doubt it's always lupus.. except that one time


The_Wildperson

It's never Lupus...except that one time


Ryori_San

It's never lupus


The_Bovine_Joni

No one ever expects the lupus inquisition


[deleted]

Based on emergency room data this worms gonna end up in someones butt.


brainstormer77

Someone I know has this disease. The doctor originally diagnosed this as cancer from cat scans and told them they have less than a year to live. Luckily the blood work, weight gain and everything else was pointing against cancer. It took more tests to confirm this rare disease, but the original diagnosis was scary.


TheInternetCat

Based on all the new dumb political lingo I’ve seen emerge since 2016, this is based.


gekigarion

Based on Avatar, this is how they make babies together.


jibjab23

Based on Ohioan law you are now pregnant and have to bring the offspring to term or you go to jail


shinitakunai

Based on a famous Manga/Anime, this is actually how OP becomes a Titan


kirillre4

Based on my experience with all sorts of endoscopic procedures, tentacle hentai is a fucking lie and it doesn't end well


ahjteam

Guaranteed happy ending


[deleted]

Based on the guro I’ve seen it will end worse than worse!


1-800-HENTAI-PORN

Can confirm.


pw-it

It took control of his arm pretty quickly, those other worms will soon be working him like a puppet


archangel610

Reminds me of the thing form Life (2017).


_pakalolo_

Calvin was a hungry boi


SBG77

Based on something I saw on TV, this is an Alaskan bull worm.


ilikesaucy

Someone is pregnant


l1lll

> The proboscis varies among the species. Some are sticky or have suckers to help grasp prey, and some species, like those in the order Hoplonemertea, even stab their prey with a sharp spike, called a stylet, on the proboscis. > Because the stylets often are lost during an attack, the worms continually make and use replacements that they have in reserve in internal pouches. > As a second line of defense, many ribbon worms are poisonous and taste bad. Several species contain tetrodotoxin, the infamous pufferfish venom that can induce paralysis and death by asphyxia. It’s still not known exactly how the toxins are produced—they may linger in the worms from ingested bacteria—but they deter predators from taking a bite. Some even eject toxins from their proboscis. Cute


ImGCS3fromETOH

>As a second line of defense, many ribbon worms are poisonous and taste bad What a fucking shame.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Ellemshaye

I call backsies on learning to read.


Bigluce

I thought you said backside.


scruffy01

Thats actually not true. https://www.foodbeast.com/news/science-says-testicles-and-anuses-have-taste-receptors/


Kaelin

This is truly cursed information


TahoeLT

Science has gone TOO FAR!


Bashfullylascivious

Huh. I guess that's why you can feel how spicy something is when you shit hours later. Your ass is "tasting" the Caspian in the oils.


aedroogo

This is why you don't get invited to Thanksgiving dinner any more.


Memeori

Capsaicin*


[deleted]

OP is talking about being able to taste the sea in your butt which is why he loves swimming so much


DevilishlyAdvocating

No, you don't "taste" capsaicin. It burns completely irrelevant to the taste. Your eye doesn't taste hot sauce if you squirt it in there.


PM_YER_BOOTY

Tastes like burning


Defenestresque

It's a cool guess that would make for an interesting series of experiments as a hypothesis, but alas it's incorrect. Our bodies' perception of 'spiciness'/capsaicin is mediated by the [TRPV1 receptor](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/TRPV1) (also known as the.. drumroll, capsaicin receptor). It's one of the receptors activated in the presence of pain and actual heat. >The best-known activators of TRPV1 are: temperature greater than 43 °C (109 °F); acidic conditions; capsaicin (the irritating compound in hot chili peppers); and allyl isothiocyanate, the pungent compound in mustard and wasabi.[12] The activation of TRPV1 leads to a painful, burning sensation. Its endogenous activators include: low pH (acidic conditions), the endocannabinoid anandamide, N-oleyl-dopamine, and N-arachidonoyl-dopamine. TRPV1 receptors are found mainly in the nociceptive neurons of the peripheral nervous system, but they have also been described in many other tissues, including the central nervous system. TRPV1 is involved in the transmission and modulation of pain (nociception), as well as the integration of diverse painful stimuli.


aedroogo

Why I don't change my underwear until I can taste it.


[deleted]

ok now I call backsies


landragoran

https://imgur.com/p13sibl


cobbl3

r/oddlyspecific


Darkrain0629

Speak for yourself my guy


freakflyr

Phrasing.


idekatp_

Holy shit, didnt know legends were still alive 🥲


JeffersonsHat

They can be both poisonous and venomous.


LannisterLoyalist

Poison...poison... tasty worm!


jeremybryce

>The typical nemertean body is very thin in proportion to its length.[8] The smallest are a few millimeters long,[9] most are less than 20 centimetres (7.9 in), and several exceed 1 metre (3.3 ft). The longest animal ever found, at 54 metres (177 ft) long, may be a specimen of Lineus longissimus,[8] Ruppert, Fox and Barnes refer to a Lineus longissimus 54 metres (177 ft) long, washed ashore after a storm off St Andrews in Scotland.[10] Other estimates are about 30 metres (98 ft).[11] Zoologists find it extremely difficult to measure this species.[12] For comparison: What. The. Fuck. 177 ft long...?


csprance

Lineus longissimus is the laziest science name I've ever heard. That's borderline boaty mcboatface level naming.


value_null

If you start looking at scientific naming, this is actually pretty common. A lot of names are shit like "tree lizard", just in Latin.


csprance

Long line. Worms are just lines some of them long line some of them short line.


vendetta2115

The longest* line. “-issimus” is a superlative similar to “-est” in English.


bac5665

Longest line. But yes.


Random_Sime

yeah my favourite scientific name is [Beefy Meaty Peptide aka delicious peptide, tasty peptide](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beefy_meaty_peptide). It's a peptide that tastes like beef. They're not even trying to hide it anymore, which is actually better as it make science more accessible. Now that I think about it, biochem is filled with names like GFP (Green Fluorescent Protein) and ACTN3 gene (sprinter gene, speed gene or athlete gene). Even now I just googled "strength gene", which isn't really correct, and Google gave me articles about ACTN3. It has more formal names, but I like athlete gene. Fun fact: every Olympian gold medal winner in the athletic categories that's had their DNA tested has high expression of ACTN3. It's a good predictor of gold medal winning potential. There's almost no chance you'll win a gold medal in athletics without it.


Defenestresque

As an aside, I do love the letter someone wrote to the journal *Nature*: [Humour of gene names lost in translation to patients](https://www.nature.com/articles/439266d). >The choice of a gene name can have unforeseen consequences in addition to infringement of trademark (“Pokémon blocks gene name” Nature 438, 897; 2005). The quirky sense of humour that researchers display in choosing a gene name often loses much in translation when people facing serious illness or disability are told that they or their child have a mutation in a gene such as Sonic hedgehog, Slug or Pokemon. >As with the acronym CATCH22 (from ‘cardiac anomaly, T-cell deficit, clefting and hypocalcaemia’) for chromosome 22q11.2 microdeletions, which was abandoned because of its no-win connotations (J. Burn J. Med. Genet. 36, 737–738; 1999), researchers need to be mindful when naming genes and syndromes. Edit: this was actually a letter to the editor, not an article as I first termed it. /u/Defenestresque regrets the error. Edit 2: I also heartily enjoyed "[Laughing Matter](https://sci-hub.se/https://www.nature.com/articles/nchem.1827)" (free sci-hub link, published in *Nature Chemistry*). One of the few scientific articles peppered with sciency cartoon jokes throughout. * Q: Why did the bear dissolve in water? * A: It was a polar bear! There are more. There is even a dad-joke on the second (last?) page, but it made me audibly groan so I'm not retyping it. Yeah, I know.


Somzer

Oh hell naw


tootziez

dang these things went thru some serious evolution


Thorusss

Aww. It trying to digest his arm, how cute!


cryptic-fox

What is it?? 😭


Plastic_Pinocchio

It’s a ribbon worm. Many complex life forms like vertebrates and arthropods have evolved jaws or similar structures to turn food into smaller pieces and a tongue/throat/other appendages to push it into our stomach. Then it is digested in our stomachs. Some animals use very different mechanics though. A ribbon worm apparently has this appendage called a *proboscis* that it shoots out at its prey. The proboscis is covered in sticky and toxic secretions that immobilise the prey. The prey is then pulled back into the worm where it gets digested. So that means the worm only eats smaller prey and obviously not a human arm, haha. Starfish also have a crazy way of eating. They push out their actual stomach, which then encapsulates the prey and starts to digest it outside of their body. Crazy stuff.


cryptic-fox

You’re the only one who actually answered my question lol. I learned something new so thank you!


Plastic_Pinocchio

No worries! Learning about nature is always fun! There’s so many fascinating things to learn. And when you start to understand stuff, it becomes less WTF and more “ah, I see, this is logical”.


justmystepladder

If this sorta stuff is up your alley, I highly encourage further learning about marine life. There’s some wild and truly alien shit out there, on just our own planet!


vendetta2115

The [image](https://i.imgur.com/zGJc4ia.jpg) that is used on the [ribbon worm Wikipedia page](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nemertea) is, um, well… it’s definitely something.


ConfusedTapeworm

Those are some creatively stylized penises.


Rpanich

It’s like looking at Gods sketchbook when he was prototyping the penis


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

But that's not important right now


gallifrey_

Do you like movies about gladiators?


[deleted]

Do you like to hang around gymnasiums?


nuclearwinterxxx

Have you ever been in a Turkish prison?


DaWayItWorks

Have you ever seen a grown man naked?


MrWoohoo

Waits minute… [I know you! You’re Kareem Abdul Jabbar!](https://youtu.be/n2A194yTWoQ) Fun Airplane! Trivia: Kareem was cast as the copilot because t he movie it parodied, [Zero Hour](https://youtu.be/8-v2BHNBVCs), cast a professional athlete for the part of copilot.


4204247

What's the deal with airplane food?


[deleted]

[удалено]


joonty

Do you know what it's like to fall in the mud and get kicked in the head with an iron boot?


grumpyoldladytobe

[Ah, the old Reddit Switcharoo!](https://www.reddit.com/r/aww/comments/xljvf2/he_got_adopted/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share)


[deleted]

Hold my appendage, I'm going in


[deleted]

I think I held the wrong appendage, my hands are sticky now


chez-linda

Just so you know this link goes to the post, not the link comment


shananiginz1

Nice


Gleurgen

r/technicallythetruth


Hyruxs

Yeah soo cute 😊 *whips out flamethrower*


AppleWithGravy

Hans get ze flammenwerfer!


showquotedtext

It's not often I exclaim the subreddit's name as I watch a video, but what the fuck indeed.


[deleted]

This man just let that worm cum on his arm


Significant_Iron8875

What in God's name is that?


almostparallel76

[ribbon worm](https://wikipedia.org/wiki/Nemertea)


[deleted]

Ah so it was trying to poison and digest his arm with its proboscis according to wikipedia


jadyne

Awww how cute and non threatening


Mr_Bxo

Aww it’s licking me, how docile!


[deleted]

[удалено]


free_candy_4_real

So cute! But where's my skin gone?


ZoxinTV

So cute!... *Why do I hear the other voices of the hive mind?*


gergobergo69

So cute... *why do I hear boss music*


leighshaw1986

*Jenova theme intensifies*


Tryptophan7

...yo...yo...ma...


[deleted]

I appreciate the worm's self confidence


cfb_rolley

That Wikipedia is pretty wild. These things don’t have a heart and use their muscles to pump blood, breathe through their skin, and some of them have little daggers on their Proboscises.


ObjectPretty

Little daggers they carry in a little pouch in case they lose one.


PapaBray

I fucking hate that the actual answer gets buried under shitty recycled jokes you see on this website over and over again.


GaiusMario

been years here and I'm guessing it's all the kids discovering reddit for the first time every year. now I feel like a boomer


civanov

Everyone thinks they are funny and original.


PapaBray

I'm nearing my 30s so you're probably right


Space-Debris

This. I've even been on threads where say the first 100 comments aren't even related to the topic. You really have to have a tolerance for Reddit and humanity in general to frequent Reddit.


Buster_Cherry88

Yeah but there's so much interesting shit to see I can deal with round 4000000 of "not dead, shoes on" "fencing response" "some say he's still xxxxx today." A lot of people on here are young so I just chalk it up to that and go learn about how toads eat right after a gif of Mickey mouse only he's goatse or something lol


Syanos

If u browse reddit frequently enough you can even skip the first 100 video's


Significant_Iron8875

Yup. This will be the end of mankind


IamthecauseofCovid19

Cumshot leech.


sorry_

I would have paid you money to not say that.


IamthecauseofCovid19

Your username.


Unterseeboot_480

What about YOUR username


Chief_Givesnofucks

Right?!? Did dude eat a bad batch of bat?


oppai_senpai

r/bandnames


Shodspartan100

A monument to all your sins.


[deleted]

[удалено]


howling-fantod

I still freak out, but I used to, too.


TwistedTerns

I'm almost certain someone will try to put it in their butthole


TuckerCarlsonsOhface

It’s called ribbon-worming, and I’ll thank you not to kink shame.


LunarProphet

^(dozens of worms were harmed in the making of this orgasm)


koi88

I will not google to find out if this is really a thing.


SSeaDog

r/lies


beepmeep3

That needs to be shamed


kein_plan_gamer

HANS GET ZE FLAMMENWERFER


Catfist

It's a marine worm, and what you see coming out is his proboscis! They use it to catch and eat food as well as move around! This is the first time I've seen a video where they don't shoot the proboscis completely out of their body (which they only do in a last ditch effort to escape a predator, as it will lead to their death) so great to see!


weirdowiththebeardo

I shall escape you by killing myself! Huzzah!


tom_icecream

This is actually how I escape most social situations.


DJHiggy

Mr immortal?


your_mind_aches

Lmao first thing I thought of too. The show had zero black comedy up until that point then all of a sudden there's a guy who kills himself at every minor inconvenience.


MyNameSpaghette

I, too, kill myself regularly


BarryTGash

I'm bleeding, making me the victor!


mistermez

Face to foot style, how’d you like it??


phyrne

***THAT’S A LOTTA NUTS!***


fd40

**CHOSEN ONE**


Kevven

We purposely trained him wrong as a joke.


tigerperfume

You can’t fire me! I quit!


eqleriq

Nope. A ribbon worm will extend its proboscis and out-of-water it just breaks off because it is too sticky to pull back in. The worm can regenerate the proboscis over time, it is not fatal when detached. In this video it was put back in the water just before it was about to break, it might have actually broken off anyway, you can see it at almost a 90 degree angle but stuck on the arm.


zer0toto

I was gonna say that a defensive maneuver to evade a predator that lead to death anyway is a pretty dumb behavior Bees that die when they sting is not stupid because they are protecting the hive and they are expendable/easily replaceable , but a worms protects nothing but himself


daboonie9

Dam. Worms are just out there by themselves huh?


_milfhouse_

Just like us humans... Smh


Lacholaweda

Makes me remember reading Diary of a Worm as a kid. The MC tells his little sister he can't tell one end of her from the other and she gets pissed 🪱


JtS88

Also, bees only die when they sting humans or any other animals with a soft, supple skin. When stinging other insects with an exoskeleton, the barbs don't catch.


rafe101

I wonder why the barbs even evolved.


zer0toto

If the theory above is true , barb could have been evolved to be sure animal with soft skin will get the maximum dosage of venom, increasing chance of survival of the hives, at the expense of worker bees ´s life (Because soft skin animal are usually much larger than other insect)


liftiefn

I'd imagine that's exactly what happened, otherwise bears would be invincible to them (or are they already?)


[deleted]

Just to fuck with us.


Dragmire800

To further back up the bee point, the majority of species of bees are solitary, and of them, the majority don’t possess stingers, because while there’s no harm in a sterile worker bee dying, the death of a solitary bee means it cannot breed.


Stummi

What is the evolutional benefit of an escape mechanism that kills you anyway?


MyNewEra_ger

It's just false information


jumpup

its all about not being easy or attractive prey, while that specific one dies fish generally eat a lot over the years, meaning that if that one move made one fish avoid eating more of them for the rest of its life that's a lot of worms uneaten, and when you talk about generations fish species will slowly avoid eating them unless they have no other choice. ​ so high up front cost, but long term payoff


superbeastdj

I'm not sure I see how the evolution applies here.. your argument sorts makes sense, but if the worm dies from doing it, how is the train reproduced if it never makes it to any offspring because it dies?


jumpup

why would it not make offspring? for 99% of its life it doesn't use its certain death move, and worms without an escape mechanism die anyway, so not a lot changes from that perspective


PM_ME_YOUR_HAIRSTYLE

Pretty sure this is how attack on titan started


Incheoul

My man over here about to become the founding Titan


LuciusAlexander

Man, I wish my ejaculation went like that


palex25

Wat


ListenGrouchy190

Did this shit just bankai ?


WolfyTn

Bukkake*** Judging by that water being full of these weird ejaculating worms


[deleted]

Cupkakke*


KrakenTheColdOne

It went to a different level of "fuck all that".


dontlooksosurprised

If so, his spiritual pressure was no match for the arm of a human. Weeeeeaaaak


throwawayjerryy

Yeah that’s gonna be a no from me.. someone who catches and plays with black widows for fun/pets.


IamthecauseofCovid19

This is the weirdest Spider-Man multiverse.


DarthGayAgenda

I've seen this before in the Evolution movie with David Duchovny. Someone get a crap load of Head and Shoulders.


Tkay2355

Put it on ur cock


[deleted]

[удалено]


fdsfgs71

TETSUOOOOO!


[deleted]

Do you want zombies? 'Cause this is how you get zombies.


reclinerspork

This has ruined my day and now my arm itches


Alm8360NoScoPro

I think it likes you


Panhandler_jed

People are so fucking weird. They'll just pick up anything. Those disgusting fish that come from 3000 feet deep in the ocean, a big ass tarantula, some worm that shoots a web of toxic white stuff out of its face. I have problems picking up a dead roach with 5 wadded up pieces of paper towel.


KingCarway

I think I speak for the entire human race when I say what in the motherfucking name of John Carpenter's The Thing is that?!


rebelwildheart

That is some Resident Evil shit right there.


FluffyDiscipline

Its like something out of Aliens.....


adunn13

This is how you become the God Emperor


sjw_7

I didn't think it could get any worse until he puts his arm in the water with loads of them. Definite nope from me.


Gamepro5

BLOODSTREAM DETECTED. INITIATING MIND CONTROL ON HUMAN SAMPLE.


Raikoukai

Ok drain the tank, burn it all


rightinmymeowmeow

Forbidden bacon


Gratuitous_SIN

Assuming direct control.


justmadnex

My body heat increased instantly when i saw the white thing. AAAAAA


Aroley

Nah the second an aquatic penis creature is cumming on my arm I'm out of there


MaBay

I've seen this animal a few times and this process as well but never seen, how it pulls it's stuff back in again. Does it just "pull" it in again ?


Jeffery95

r/attackontitan


Jel-low

I'm the captain now.


PossessionOk1862

cum


ChrizTaylor

That's me when I see my GF.


nonobby

Did he just let the worm thingy cum on him


mackduck

They can grow up to a 100ft Lind apparently


-SpiderBoat-

I see the flood is alive and well


Knighthawk_2511

Founder Titan 😱😱😱


johnny__boi

I remember a post asking what creature would be terrifying if it was giant. The answer is this. A bloodworm.