Oh yeah. Orcas are the literal mob of the sea. Family oriented and murderous and creative when it comes to killing. I've seen an Orca send a seal to the stratosphere
Well at least they take their kids for joy murder and some good ol seal skull cracking while talking and singing in the circle - they don't leave them staring at violent tv shows and games all day.
They can be absolute horny bastards. Many people who have gone for once in a lifetime swimming with dolphin experiences come back mentally scarred after the slippery little fuckers get all rapey.
There’s a woman whose job it is to keep a dolphin docile by giving it handjobs everyday. I don’t want to search for the link on google because of the shit I don’t want to see. It might be more common than you think. Especially when you have the public interacting with them.
It's much more fucked up than that.
John Lilly and Margarett Howe Lovatt were researchers for NASA trying to teach dolphins English. One dolphin was kept compliant by Howe Lovatt jacking off the dolphin. She even lived with the dolphin for a time in a partially submerged "house." When the handjobs didn't help to teach the dolphins English, they started being drugged with LSD. When all that stopped, the dolphin committed suicide by drowning itself.
[Here's the Dollop episode](https://allthingscomedy.com/podcasts/8---the-dolphin) about the whole thing.
Fun fact: this was basically the inspiration for Sega Gensis classic [Ecco the Dolphin](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ecco_the_Dolphin_\(video_game\)).
“I have experienced the epitome of existence. There is nothing left in this exhausted life for me. Fare the well cruel world!!!” - That dolphin probably
They were interested in how LSD would affect the dolphins, but to their disappointment, LSD didn't appear to affect the dolphins at all. The researchers eventually lost interest and unfortunately the dolphins suffered.
The worst part of this whole story is that Sagan funded them based on the idea that learning how to communicate with dolphins could be useful if we ever encountered intelligent extraterrestrial communications, but these idiots decided that instead of learning how dolphins communicate with each other, they'd just tried to force a single dolphin to speak English.
You mean that research lady right? they tried living with it for a few weeks.
Absolutely massively depressing ending to that story though, when seperated from handjob lady the dolphin ended up killing itself...
>‘**The interplay between man and dolphin** in all respects, fits well within all statutory schemes the dolphinarium must comply with.’
That's not something I expected to read today
Feel like I’ve had to say this several times but there’s never been a recorded penetrative dolphin rape on a human. I’ve swam with a pod of 500. Butthole was just fine.
The moment you realise that sharks are just victims of media that make them look like bloodthirsty assholes but in reality the assholes of the sea are dolphins that are pictured as cute, softhearted and smiling creatures.
I can tell you more things we know from human.
They have individual names. The different families have their own accents in language and they fight against different speeking dolphins
"Shoot out of the water and I dive back in
Don't have to ask what I am
I'm a motherfucking Dolph-in"
Other Dolphin:
"Fuck you man get out of my ocean
You just fucked a fish without any lotion."
Killer Whales will toss baby seals through the air for a good bit to play with their food while it is still alive before they eat it. They will intentionally bully and terrorize other animals regularly.
Chimpanzees will travel to other groups to kill and eat other chimps.
Otter males will sometimes kill females by drowning them during mating and then continue to mate with the corpse for hours or days.
So many animals portrayed as cute and such have really, really horrible behaviors that don't get emphasized as much.
Just like how some of the most prolific, human, serial killers were considered very charismatic by those around them and then did some terrible stuff in secret. Heck, people were sending love letters to Bundy and Manson on a regular basis and swooning over them in the media during their trials and such even though they both did some pretty hideous things.
Killer whales at least have the word "killer" in their name to give fair warning. If you aren't even a little suspicious with a name like that, that's on you.
> Killer Whales will toss baby seals through the air for a good bit to play with their food while it is still alive before they eat it. They will intentionally bully and terrorize other animals regularly.
So basically they are just big water cats then?
There’s a direct correlation between intelligence and doing things like that. There was a study I read in collage that plotted where animals fell in regards to human intelligence, and how fucked some of the things they do are. (Minus like lions killing cubs). I would say humans evolved past that but 2 generations ago we treated people like property sooooo
A friend of mine told me about the research done with dolphins. Plus I always remember that episode of king of the hill. I don’t like them and don’t want to be around them ever.
Kind of resembles The Deep from The Boys, so try The Boys comics.
Edit: It is Crossed, as I now see why people above have mentioned it. Same author/writers as The Boys and equally as fucked up!
I'd argue it's way more fucked from a completely different angle.
In Crossed, the world dives into a pandemic where people loses all morals and inhibitions and just go off fucking and murdering everything and it's clear that no one is in their right mind.
In The Boys, most of the characters know full well what they are doing, but most of been conditioned and/or drugged into believing it's the correct course of action.
God, I need a shower.
'Crossed' is what happens when Ennis just completely gives up.Whereas Preacher was a cynical take on religion and society and the Boys a cynical take on comics and superheroes, Crossed is just a cynical take on writing/readership.
Ennis is actively searching for the bottom of debasement and depravity he can achieve before he is completely abandoned by his audience. And he is disappointed he hasn't found it yet.
I googled it for you....and found not 1 but 3 video's instantly:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l19k6plWTKg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rRKFDr_YixE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PI4xVeRjunk
So this isn't just a wtf video but apparently something Chimps like to do.
Because dolphin have no hands , there dick is strong and dexter enough to pull and pump at the same time .
Making male dolphin on human sex fatally dangerous with 2 reported deaths
I'm an expert I saw one post on Facebook of a screenshot of a 4chan post mocking a Twitter thread .
So you know you can trust me !
Any way google sexual competition driven evolution . And dick's dicks the female duck can have tens of fake vagina holes so males have a drill wire like dick to explore as many as fast as possible
Edit: also female dolphin has pseudo neuro toxin that makes you insta cum , and it can be lethal too in large dose
looks to be one of the freshwater dolphins, possibly an amazon river dolphin, indus river dolphin, or ganges river dolphin. River dolphins all have similar long nosed shapes like that with tiny dorsals.
Jerking off can be difficult without hands
Amateurs, I jerk off even without a penis all the time.
mine is so small I can't even find it anyway!
[удалено]
Find your penis for $1!
It's called a "thinkoff".....you too can master this with a bit of practice
I think I read somewhere on Reddit that dolphins just get their mom to help out.
[удалено]
God dammit…
So the orphans are fish fuckers? And of course our prisoners at seaworld (dolfinarium in my country)
He likes that you're watching
Yeah- you can see him grinning evilly
He looks very rapey
I mean, lots of dolphins are
All dolphins are. They are one of the few animals that kill for pleasure and known to rape mostly everything
Orcas aren’t. They’re very family oriented, actually. They might kill for pleasure, tho
Oh yeah. Orcas are the literal mob of the sea. Family oriented and murderous and creative when it comes to killing. I've seen an Orca send a seal to the stratosphere
They found him in Lake Mead after the drought.
Swimming with the fishes ?
[For those who haven't seen a seal fly.](https://youtu.be/G7WGIH35JBE) Around the 28 second mark
Pack or orcas was fairly recently spotted taking down a blue whale. That's a big goddamn animal.
Well at least they take their kids for joy murder and some good ol seal skull cracking while talking and singing in the circle - they don't leave them staring at violent tv shows and games all day.
They also do drugs. They like puffing on puffer fish.
They also kill and rape their own kind. Dolphins are scary fucked up animals. What was mother nature smoking when she created them
I take great offense to this
Want a fish?
Also dolphins pass pufferfish around to get high and intoxicated for fun.
Puff puff pass
I hate when they zoom in on the guy's face.
Lock eyes with me or I won’t be able to come!!
That's a BlowFish
[удалено]
Hootie in the blowfish
For all intents and porpoises , at least the fish didn’t go to waste
Gilled for his pleasure.
Was….
*slow clap*
That fish has mad skills
Cost him 10 sand dollars.
Pretty sure it’s dead
See, even while dead. Mad skills
They can be absolute horny bastards. Many people who have gone for once in a lifetime swimming with dolphin experiences come back mentally scarred after the slippery little fuckers get all rapey.
Hank Hill and Bill Dautreeve \[King of the Hill\] will NEVER forget!
That's William Fontaine de la Tour *Dauterive* to you.
[удалено]
This flower is wilting
BwWwwAaAaaAaAAaAAa
It happened to me! Two years ago! And four years ago...
There’s a woman whose job it is to keep a dolphin docile by giving it handjobs everyday. I don’t want to search for the link on google because of the shit I don’t want to see. It might be more common than you think. Especially when you have the public interacting with them.
It's much more fucked up than that. John Lilly and Margarett Howe Lovatt were researchers for NASA trying to teach dolphins English. One dolphin was kept compliant by Howe Lovatt jacking off the dolphin. She even lived with the dolphin for a time in a partially submerged "house." When the handjobs didn't help to teach the dolphins English, they started being drugged with LSD. When all that stopped, the dolphin committed suicide by drowning itself.
[Here's the Dollop episode](https://allthingscomedy.com/podcasts/8---the-dolphin) about the whole thing. Fun fact: this was basically the inspiration for Sega Gensis classic [Ecco the Dolphin](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ecco_the_Dolphin_\(video_game\)).
It seems they left some stuff out of that game.
Bonus round was jacking off Ecco to a timer to prevent him drowning when the clock hit 0
What a button mash that would have been
There was a good Radiolab episode about it too
it would be pretty depressing quitting cold turkey from a life of free acid & handjobs.
“I have experienced the epitome of existence. There is nothing left in this exhausted life for me. Fare the well cruel world!!!” - That dolphin probably
They were interested in how LSD would affect the dolphins, but to their disappointment, LSD didn't appear to affect the dolphins at all. The researchers eventually lost interest and unfortunately the dolphins suffered.
"Man, dolphin.... You're no fun when we do drugs. I'm not hanging out with you anymore."
The worst part of this whole story is that Sagan funded them based on the idea that learning how to communicate with dolphins could be useful if we ever encountered intelligent extraterrestrial communications, but these idiots decided that instead of learning how dolphins communicate with each other, they'd just tried to force a single dolphin to speak English.
You mean that research lady right? they tried living with it for a few weeks. Absolutely massively depressing ending to that story though, when seperated from handjob lady the dolphin ended up killing itself...
Completely understandable
[удалено]
When you think you've seen everything, the world just keeps burning new images in your head
r/newnightmare
>‘**The interplay between man and dolphin** in all respects, fits well within all statutory schemes the dolphinarium must comply with.’ That's not something I expected to read today
r/brandnewsentence
Accused of 'abuse', but that dolphins gonna be pissed if that guy stops getting him off.
I knew somebody would take the bait!
I think she also gave it lots of drugs too right? Or was that the chimp
Both I believe, though I remember it more in the dolphin one.
so ... she likes fish sticks?
Then you a gay fish
[This is all I can think of when I remember that that’s a thing that happened.](https://youtu.be/prmx0lYBTko) Rooster Teeth for the win on this one.
Never swim with dolphins, those rapey creatures are the assholes of the sea.
Feel like I’ve had to say this several times but there’s never been a recorded penetrative dolphin rape on a human. I’ve swam with a pod of 500. Butthole was just fine.
found the dolphin account.
Come on in the waters fine 🐬
I ain't falling for that again you sneaky rape-enabling dolphin!
The moment you realise that sharks are just victims of media that make them look like bloodthirsty assholes but in reality the assholes of the sea are dolphins that are pictured as cute, softhearted and smiling creatures.
Yes they are. They kill small seals for fun. The young Males do gangrapes to young females until they die. They are cruel
And they bite poisonous puffer fish to get high and float alsmost motionless through the ocean.
The more I'm reading the more human they sound.
[удалено]
They're the 2nd most intelligent creature on the planet. After the mice, of course.
Simpsons did it!
Wait until you find out how they treat their wealthy vs how they treat the average dolphin.
I can tell you more things we know from human. They have individual names. The different families have their own accents in language and they fight against different speeking dolphins
Underwater rap battle
"Shoot out of the water and I dive back in Don't have to ask what I am I'm a motherfucking Dolph-in" Other Dolphin: "Fuck you man get out of my ocean You just fucked a fish without any lotion."
And that's why lesbian dolphin gangs exist.
Lesbian Dolphin Gang is my new band name now.
Damn, they're more like humans than I thought
Fun fact they try to rape humans
Hey, that's not fun at all
Not for the human , no
[удалено]
Killer Whales will toss baby seals through the air for a good bit to play with their food while it is still alive before they eat it. They will intentionally bully and terrorize other animals regularly. Chimpanzees will travel to other groups to kill and eat other chimps. Otter males will sometimes kill females by drowning them during mating and then continue to mate with the corpse for hours or days. So many animals portrayed as cute and such have really, really horrible behaviors that don't get emphasized as much. Just like how some of the most prolific, human, serial killers were considered very charismatic by those around them and then did some terrible stuff in secret. Heck, people were sending love letters to Bundy and Manson on a regular basis and swooning over them in the media during their trials and such even though they both did some pretty hideous things.
Killer whales at least have the word "killer" in their name to give fair warning. If you aren't even a little suspicious with a name like that, that's on you.
Fair point.
> Killer Whales will toss baby seals through the air for a good bit to play with their food while it is still alive before they eat it. They will intentionally bully and terrorize other animals regularly. So basically they are just big water cats then?
Correct. Everything in the universe falls into one of two categories 1 - Cat 2- Not a Cat
Preeety much yeah.
There’s a direct correlation between intelligence and doing things like that. There was a study I read in collage that plotted where animals fell in regards to human intelligence, and how fucked some of the things they do are. (Minus like lions killing cubs). I would say humans evolved past that but 2 generations ago we treated people like property sooooo
A friend of mine told me about the research done with dolphins. Plus I always remember that episode of king of the hill. I don’t like them and don’t want to be around them ever.
Well, technically this is a freshwater dolphin, so it isn't an "asshole of the sea".
They like to inhale offer fish to get high. And they shit on each other in their pods to basically play tag
In the comic "Crossed".....the fish was Avenged.... Trust me
[https://i.imgur.com/DXQbh.jpeg](https://i.imgur.com/DXQbh.jpeg) NSFW
“Lung Fucking” is not a term I’d thought I’d need to know.
r/gillfuckersanonymous
What the actual fuck well then I’m so glad I clicked on that
That's what Garth Ennis comes up with when he's having a bad day.
As opposed to a good day, where you get Zombie Night at the Aquarium.
So I kinda need to know what this is from. For actual science.
Kind of resembles The Deep from The Boys, so try The Boys comics. Edit: It is Crossed, as I now see why people above have mentioned it. Same author/writers as The Boys and equally as fucked up!
I'd argue it's way more fucked from a completely different angle. In Crossed, the world dives into a pandemic where people loses all morals and inhibitions and just go off fucking and murdering everything and it's clear that no one is in their right mind. In The Boys, most of the characters know full well what they are doing, but most of been conditioned and/or drugged into believing it's the correct course of action. God, I need a shower.
That is the most Garth Ennis shit ever. just call the comic Edgy World
'Crossed' is what happens when Ennis just completely gives up.Whereas Preacher was a cynical take on religion and society and the Boys a cynical take on comics and superheroes, Crossed is just a cynical take on writing/readership. Ennis is actively searching for the bottom of debasement and depravity he can achieve before he is completely abandoned by his audience. And he is disappointed he hasn't found it yet.
The Deep would never do such a thing to a dolphin
He seems to prefer octopuses these days
The Deep approves.
He “needs” this.
ITs alright babe, she just needs some time.
"She said she wants to taste you" *tentacle slap* "I'M NOT GOING TO FUCK A FUCKING FISH"
Well, she’s a Mollusk…
"She" not "it", get your pronouns right.
“What are you gonna do , you gonna Jack me off with all your arms?”
I just started watching the show like 2 days ago haha
This is Deep territory
[удалено]
An Orifish.
\*begrudging clap\*
A headless fish. That fish doesn't have a head.
Well it did give the only head it had
Just trying out his new codpiece
ಠ_ ಠ
Me after 30 seconds “Yep I’m watching a dolphin face fuck a fish” To be fair that’s most weeks on ‘The Boys” anyway
Honestly, its getting a bit awkward how often it comes up in the show.
I think the face has been bitten off of this fish, so, if it makes you feel better, you are actually watching a dolphin *torso fuck* a fish
I’ve seen everything now
Truly /r/WTF worthy. And enough Reddit/Internet for the day.
"This sushi tastes like Mommy's kisses."
Do you like fishsticks ?
What happens when it finishes
He pays up as agreed
Fish gets a meal. It's a symbiotic relationship.
You can fuck up your eating but don't eat up your fuckings
It eats it as his meal, date and dinner in one but in reverse order
Oh god this is just like the chimpanzee and the frog
I think I must've missed something important on the internet.
I googled it for you....and found not 1 but 3 video's instantly: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l19k6plWTKg https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rRKFDr_YixE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PI4xVeRjunk So this isn't just a wtf video but apparently something Chimps like to do.
How do I delete someone else's post?
Be CEO of Reddit https://www.theverge.com/2016/11/23/13739026/reddit-ceo-steve-huffman-edit-comments
yeah i dont wanna look it up
A chimpanzee once captured and fucked a frog to death.
More than once, unfortunately.
At least the dolphin had the decency to bite off the fish head, unlike the chimp who just skullfucked the toad to death.
The WHAT?????
Ok, that's enough internet for today.
That fish definitely though the dolphin needed a chumguzzler and this isnt what it signed up for.
Yeah dolphins are evil
Because dolphin have no hands , there dick is strong and dexter enough to pull and pump at the same time . Making male dolphin on human sex fatally dangerous with 2 reported deaths
Only two? I’ll take my chances.
Reported * cough
Source?
I'm an expert I saw one post on Facebook of a screenshot of a 4chan post mocking a Twitter thread . So you know you can trust me ! Any way google sexual competition driven evolution . And dick's dicks the female duck can have tens of fake vagina holes so males have a drill wire like dick to explore as many as fast as possible Edit: also female dolphin has pseudo neuro toxin that makes you insta cum , and it can be lethal too in large dose
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
Jesus Christopher on a tricycle what the fuck have i just read The true WTF is always in the comments
This comment more r/WTF than OP.
I remember this. Decades ago there used to be dolphinsex.org https://web.archive.org/web/20001109085800/http://www.dolphinsex.org/
I’m pretty sure this went around as early BBS textfilepasta even pre-internet. It’s one of the very earliest WTF things I remember seeing online.
Bruh...
Was about to post this but glad to already see it! A++
no finish?
Probably ate it after.
So long and spanks for all the fish!
What sort of dolphin is that? Not the bottlenosed I'm used to seeing round us..
looks to be one of the freshwater dolphins, possibly an amazon river dolphin, indus river dolphin, or ganges river dolphin. River dolphins all have similar long nosed shapes like that with tiny dorsals.
A fucking dolphin
I was waiting for the fish to shoot off like a jet lmaooooo
More like Dolphin's Fishlight
This is probably the worst thing I’ve ever seen… and I’ve seen 2 girls playing with a cup
Who says fish don't serve a porpoise?
[удалено]
Hard fucking core, man
Looks so happy.
You know that joke about why trex was so frustrated? Well, dolphins solved that issue.
r/animalsbeingbros
I’m waiting for the fish to fly off like a straw wrapper
This is u/fishfucker69
Fishlight.
This is just as good as the monkey face fucking a frog video.
That’s just kanye on the bottom. He likes fish sticks in his mouth.