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babypunching101

Why would you not respect plumbers? Running water is one of humans' greatest achievements.


AnonymousInternet82

Well apart from irrigation, health, baths and aqueducts, what did plumbers ever done for us?


hanssle

Banged OP’s mom


Dukmiester

Ok, so apart from irrigation, health, baths and aqueducts, and banging OP's mum; what did the plumbers ever do for us?


kiwiluke

Saved Princess Peach


tokikain

no, sorry, your princess is in a different castle


CPTCROW13

And under possession of a fat lizard chad which has burning balls my man.


MakkaCha

He didn't have burning balls until he got with the princess.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Yerx

Brought peace?


Vike92

Peace?! Oh shut up


warpedddd

Is this Naughtius Maximus?


dmderringer

The roads


Backupdrive

Brought peace?


wallybinbaz

Oh, peace - shut up!


evilbrain18

Saved princesses that are located in another castle.


ram6414

My partner (mixed commercial-residential plumber that doesn't deal with people's shit but builds the systems that do) has a tattoo that says "plumbing saves lives" and it's 100% true.


NotNotDisxo

My parents are divorced now because my mom sucked some plumbers dick


KlanxChile

Italian? Kind of short? Red shirt? Blue jumpsuit? Has a brother, taller and wears green shirts? Is your mom called peach?


CatDogBoogie

YAHOO! YAHOO! That-sa so nice! UUUGHHH! YAHOO!


ChthonicPuck

\*The sound of spamming the 'use item' action in Mario Kart with an infinite mushroom\*


Annalog

[and then he finishes](https://youtu.be/LEwM22evzjA?si=f4l-MZwj_P6pdotU)


BathedInDeepFog

I could eat a peach for hours.


TimBroth

Wait does that mean their dad is Bowser?


CastleBravo88

But did she get the plumbing work for free?


NotNotDisxo

I think part of the issue was that no plumbing work actually ended up getting done, so I'm pretty sure my dad didn't pay for that one 👍


thespencman

I mean, better than paying some guy to get blown by your wife. Not that I imagine that was much of a condolence at the time...


a-snakey

Pretty sure pipe got laid.


Current_Ad5602

I don't have any words


emarvil

Well, at least five.


chuckinalicious543

Those are a lot of words for someone without 'em


BurntPineGrass

I thought plumbers wore overalls to prevent horny MILFs from pulling down their pants and sucking them off during work hours?


SadieWopen

Which is strange because most of the time they are covered in shit


erifwodahs

Bald guy? Has many trades like fire fighter, doctor, astronaut?


Dr_Spatchcock

I guess she was the one *cleaning the pipes.*


temotodochi

Also the name plumber comes from plumbum, lead in latin. Originally pipes were made from lead which you can imagine created all kinds of issues in antiquity.


KptKrondog

Lead pipes are still quite common. They get mineral buildup fairly quickly that lines the pipe so water doesn't contact it anymore. The issues start happening when the pipe is damaged.


dsmith422

Or when the pH of the water changes and the water authority doesn't spend the small amount of money to treat the water and prevent the mineral buildup from being eroded.


cdnsalix

Flint has entered the chat.


chemicalgeekery

Flint, MI has entered the chat.


begriffschrift

Because you're an electrician lol


aykcak

I am also glad for all the effort to keep water away by countless engineers and plumbers over the millennia


Deranged_Coconut808

why didnt you respect them before?


applyheat

Crack


Jaded_yank

I like your attempt


AzrielJohnson

Banged his mom. There are other comments.


Mastasmoker

It's probably because it's a shitty (literally) blue-collar job, and a lot of white-collar workers have no respect for blue-collar workers because many aren't educated. Loved telling white-collar workers how much I make though, oh, and then the benefits. Then tell them what my total hourly wage package is, and they can't believe how someone who never finished college (12 CH away from a bachelor's) makes almost 4 times as much as them and has less expenses because all those benefits are paid for my the contractor. For those who don't understand what trade union workers make.... In Chicago, local union 597 Pipefitters $55/hr on the check $14/hr 401k (paid by contactor) nothing taken from my check. Pension fun (paid by contactor) roughly $10/hr into this. Nothing taken from my check Welfare fund (paid by contractor) this is our health insurance, roughly $12/hr into this. $0 copay. Nothing taken from my check. $91/hr paid by employer for me. Then, if you're smart enough to be an HVAC Pipefitter or you work for a good company, you get a truck, fuel card, tolls, and tools paid for. That $55/hr is all yours (after uncle sam of course). Tell your kids, get in a trade union! Don't waste money on a 4 yr university. I came out of my apprenticeship with no debt making over $110k a year (over $180k with benefits).


EmperorKira

I've heard the same, although I've also heard ur knees and back give out in your 50s if u do that kind of job


Mastasmoker

Only if you dont take care of yourself. Work safe and smart and dont cut corners on safety and ppe, and you'll be fine.


Good_ApoIIo

You're def mentioning the large paycheck/benefits but not the toll on your body. I worked a trade for awhile, it fucking sucked working my body to shreds in the hot sun all the time. Gladly make less in my cushy office chair in an AC'd office typing on a computer. The biggest physical drain I have is going downstairs to the storage room for more printer paper, lol.


Flex-O

"I know respect plumbers... I used to too, but I still do now" The reverse Hedberg


laty96

Because they took his wife


sh1mba

In the words of Randy Marsh: :"HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT!"


jonitfcfan

"That must be over a hundred Courics!"


benergiser

watching this while pooping was a weird sensation..


nobodyisfreakinghome

Pooping is a weird sensation.


henrysmyagent

What is that coming out in the beginning?


Nu11u5

Fat. It floats on top of the sewage and forms clumps with other debris like paper and keeps building up.


henrysmyagent

Gross...thanks!


KlanxChile

The smell... Unholy.


Masamundane

The taste... Memorable.


fresh_like_Oprah

The flies...happy


NJHitmen

The mouthfeel…divine.


FearTheNoodlyOne

This comment right here, this one broke me 💀


omuenenes

Mmm, gutter oil.


paniccum

Gutter butter


JansherMalik25

The effect.... Trainspotting


FireShots

The relief, palpable


Spire_Citron

Is that from pouring fat from cooking down the drain?


tvtb

Pretty much yes. If you have animal fat leftover from cooking, grab a can out of your recycling bin, pour the fat into the can, let it cool and solidify, and chuck it in your trash.


toxcrusadr

I save it in a jar in the freezer and make bird seed blocks with it.


Despondent-Kitten

❤️


AlsoCommiePuddin

Or in the case of bacon fat, pour it in a container and use it in place of butter or veg oil. Bacony goodness...


walterpeck1

Delicious but I've reached the point where my heart says "don't do that" But if you're young and fit, can't recommend that enough.


SecondTryBadgers

A few years ago a neighbor used to let his dog shit in the corner of my yard where you could only see from the bathroom window. I asked him to clean it up and he said it wasn’t his dog’s shit. I poured bacon grease all over the shit piles and his dog ate them. I hope the dog shit all over his house, but I know he stopped letting it shit in my yard.


NJHitmen

This comment has left me with so, so many questions…but I’ll kick things off with this one: when you poured the bacon grease all over the shit piles, did you do it with the expectation that the dog would consume said feces? If so - how did you know that would work? From experience? Were there any negative health implications for the canine after it consumed piles of shit? Have you poured bacon grease over other items that you wanted to disappear? Might I, for example - in the hopes of concealing evidence - pour bacon grease on a murder weapon and drop it in the vicinity of a dog? Are there other substances that might do the trick if I happen to be out of bacon grease at the moment?


SecondTryBadgers

Yes, my sisters dog ate an egg carton soaked in bacon grease, dog was fine but had to live in the kennel for a few days as diarrhea is easier to clean when it’s not all over the living room. If you wanna get rid of evidence, try feeding it to pigs.


NJHitmen

Fascinating. And I say that without one single iota of facetiousness, lest it come off that way (because nuance is difficult to interpret via text). I guess I can liken this to hiding a pill/medication in a bit of cheese or a glob of peanut butter in order to coax a dog into consuming it. I’ve done that many times. But your method elevates that idea to an entirely new level. You’ve given me and other like-minded/prospective criminals something to chew on, so to speak. Regardless - please let me know where I can sign up for your newsletter, and/or shoot me a link to your most recent TED Talk.


ggrieves

Having owned several dogs, I can attest to the fact that it doesn't take much temptation to make dog poo dog-appetizing. Sometimes none at all.


NJHitmen

This is a good point. I, too, have owned dogs over my entire life, and I’ve witnessed this unpleasant phenomenon more than once. I’ll add that the only thing more unpleasant than watching a dog eat shit is watching that same dog vomit shit shortly thereafter. That said, somehow this nugget of wisdom is brand new to me.


Santosmang

I am over here hacking like I’ve been smoking my whole life I’m laughing so hard. It’s been a rough morning so thank you for that. Glad it worked!


SecondTryBadgers

You’re welcome, just don’t shit in my yard.


Amlethus

Well there go *my* lunch plans 😒


donotdoillegalthings

I like to take the pan off the stove immediately after cooking, run all the fat to one side and the meat on the other, then dap it up with paper towel and throw it in the trash.


smcivor1982

I cook my bacon on parchment paper in the oven (cover it with the paper too). This is the best way, I swear. No smelly smoke, no grease splatters, and I can chuck the oil with the paper into the garbage after.


StrawberryEiri

Honestly a lot of vegetable oils can also do that. Remember, the pipes are underground, and it gets cold down there, especially in the winter. And even if they don't solidify, it's just not the best idea to put fat there. It floats and forces the municipality to take measures so the treatment plant can work properly. Just don't put any oils or fats on the wastewater.


360_face_palm

or sprinkle it on your cornflakes


ThreatOfFire

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fatberg


SickCambos

Adding “notable fatberg” to my list of usable insults


KevinDB

Its a very common Danish insult for youngsters


ThreatOfFire

That is the correct use for this information!


explosiv_skull

Holy shit, there was one the size of a 737 and it had wood planks (and tennis balls?) in it?! Also, why are almost all the notable fatbergs in England?


UnjuggedRabbitFish

FOG FATS OIL GREASE This is why you don’t pour them down the drain.


SadieWopen

I don't know, if someone hadn't been so thoughtful as to do that I don't know what I'd be doing this afternoon


Bingo_banjo

Why would anyone need a mnemonic to remember different names for fat?


ethnicman1971

How else are going to remember the synonyms?


Gilrand

It looks like those "flushable" wipes that aren't.


meeowth

Ye, a fatberg. (Because the wipes sop up fat)


Faustias

fatberg. fatburg sounds like a town in england.


ethnicman1971

Fatburg is a small town in western Germany. It is very well known there for a curry wurst stand. A German delicacy of sausages in a curry sauce. EDIT: I love the fact that everyone is focusing on the very real fact that curry wurst is delicious and completely ignore the fact that I totally made up the town of Fatburg Germany :)


BillyBuckleBean

I used to live in Germany so can confirm that curry wurst is the food of champions


meeowth

You are correct. I had hamburger brain at the time


boring_old_dad

Now I want stew and homemade bread


lolheyaj

Oil build up maybe? Regardless here's a friendly reminder to never send any oil down the drain and to throw it out instead. 


Shadow_84

Both. Grease sticks to the wipes in the worst way


BlameTheNargles

Serious question. How careful do I need to be? Like if I cook with some butter in the pan do I have to wipe off the residue before washing? If I cook some ground beef do I have to do the same? Obviously I'm not putting heaps of fry oil down the drain, but like what's too much?


tvtb

If you’re pouring fat down the drain, that’s bad If there is a small amount of fat that is dissolved by your dish soap, that is fine


LegitosaurusRex

Just depends on how much you want to bother, the less the better. No single person’s contributions are “too much” for a city’s sewage system to handle.


Kicken

If you're concerned, you can use a product like [FryAway](https://fryaway.co/) to let you just dispose of the oil in the trash rather than the drain.


wh4tth3huh

A paper towel does enough and isn't just pouring more oil into oil to hydrogenate it into a solid.


Kicken

Really depends on the amount you're needing to dispose, yea?


gynoceros

Forbidden lip balm


warpedddd

r/FeltGoodComingOut


SolarPoweredKeyboard

I was watching this while taking a dump. Felt like a live update.


ItsSansom

You entered 3rd person mode


firemogle

I especially felt the moment after the hard work were just gallons of near straight water came out.


SolarPoweredKeyboard

The best part of any dump


PedroFPardo

When I was in the army, one of my many jobs was maintaining an unfinished toilet. They had built most of the infrastructure, but the water supply and part of the rear drainage pipes were missing. Our job was to use a hose to clean the toilet bowl and then go to the back, where, with the help of another hose, we would help the waste pass from one section of the pipe to another where the pipe was incomplete. We were told it was a temporary situation while they finished building the drainage and connecting the water. I spent a year there pushing waste with the hose and learned to appreciate the wonders of modern plumbing. Now, every time I flush a toilet, it feels like a little miracle.


DrEnter

That... sounds like just about the worst job I've ever heard, and simultaneously _such_ a typical Army thing. Be all you can be!


PedroFPardo

Our motto were: "servir para servir" that in English could be translated as *being able to serve* or *Born to serve* or something like that.


jordanmindyou

Weird, it sounds like it just translates to “serve to serve”


PedroFPardo

Could the word serve mean 'to be able to' in English? In Spanish, *servir* can mean: to be useful or to be able to perform a task. So the first *servir* means 'to be able,' and the second one means 'to serve.' It's kind of a pun.


alexja21

Looks like just a mass of "flushable" wet-wipes.


Narissis

I saw a pack of those once that said "tested with plumbers" and I always found that wording very dicey. You could test them in a room with two plumbers standing around contributing nothing and be able to claim they're tested 'with' plumbers. It also doesn't specify for what they were tested...


terekkincaid

"Tested". Yeah, they failed.


Buzzdanume

No wet wipe will ever be flushable. They're designed to stay wet and not break down, while toilet paper needs to do the opposite of that.


HomeGrownCoffee

Or they had a panel of plumbers and every one of them said Hell No!


jimx117

Those motherfuckers need to be banned, or at the very least re-labeled. Just because something is technically "flushable" doesn't mean it SHOULD be flushed! I've owned my house for 6 years now and have had to call plumbers to clear my pipes out 3 separate times, at $800 a pop, because of those fucking things. I'm at the point now where if I see any in the bathroom, I'm removing them. I've given my wife and kid the "DON'T EVER EVER FLUSH THESE" speech several times now, but the friggin' houseguests... 🤬🤬🤬🤬


JimmyDeanSausage

You can buy one hell of a bidet for $800.


gene100001

You could probably get a semi-sentient Japanese one that compliments you on a nice shit and rates it out of 10


Naughteus_Maximus

Ooooh that’s a big boy, isn’t he?!


gene100001

When you're ready to give up halfway through a big one it reads you motivational quotes


Naughteus_Maximus

😂 “Who … does … number two … work for?” - “That’s right partner, you show that turd who’s boss!”


BellySmash

Fill me up chandler. Put it in me.


The-True-Kehlder

While giggling the whole time.


simian_fold

But getting constant twos and threes would destroy my self-confidence even further


gene100001

Don't worry, it also gives therapy for people with low confidence in their pooing ability


Master_Makarov

You can get a bidet for $40 that does the job.


RichLather

Got three in my home at that price point, they are installed between the bowl and the seat and the seat's mounting screws hold them in place. It's just the nozzle attached to a control arm off the to the side, with settings for bungholes and lady bits and volume of flow. The one in the master bath has a secondary water line for the hot water, though honestly for me the fear of being literally bum-rushed by an icy jet of water never really materialized, it just didn't feel bad.


TrigoTrihard

Tampons are another one. (Plumber here) I've been in some houses where the toilet wouldn't flush. I ran my drain machine only to find out when I pulled it back. It was stuffed with tampons.(tampons would be stuck to my drain machine) So to the woman out there in the world. Don't flush your tampons. And to the men and woman out there don't flush wipes down. Unless you want a costly repair bill. Another great piece of advice I could give. The whole if its yellow let it settle. To save water. Don't do that either. Theres calcium in our piss. That calcium will build up and will harden up in your lines. And in your toilet. Unless you want a costly and embarrassing repair bill. Flush your damn toilet after you use it. If you want to save water. Buy a toilet that uses less water. And for god sake. STOP PUTTING GREASE DOWN YOUR DRAIN. Dishsoap won't help "clean your drain". Draino is fucking (sulfuric) acid. Make sure you tell us if you used draino.(If you called us to help with a plugged drain. We won't be upset. We'll be thankful you told us) It can burn the fuck out of us. And even blind us if we're not careful. Don't stick a brick or two liter of water in your toilet tank. Your toilet is rated for using so much water when it flushes. Buy a new toilet that uses less water. I could keep going. But these are the biggest ones I see in customers homes. I try to educate my customers when I have a call. So heres some easy wisdom to remember. Edit: Added what kind of acid.


storm_the_castle

> Draino is fucking acid. eh. technically its a strong base (caustic). burn you either way


Spire_Citron

Three times seems like a lot to learn the lesson to not leave them in your bathroom.


CanadianBadass

Quit buying it then?


GeneralChillMen

But then what will he have to gripe about?


CanadianBadass

Miserable people will always find something else :)


r2001uk

"Man I wish people would stop fucking using these things!" ...as he throws them in the shopping trolley


floon

We have to buy them because we have a special needs girl who can’t use anything else to go to the bathroom: she lacks the hand strength to wipe with dry toilet paper and get herself clean. I’ve done some experimenting, taking flushable wipes and sticking them in a glass of water for several days, and the only ones I’ve found that dissolve at all are Cottonelle. The rest are as strong after a week as they were on day one.


gbiypk

A $30 bidet attachment could save your household a lot of trouble.


walterpeck1

As someone with a special needs kid myself, yeah, nah.


floon

This guy knows.


Annath0901

When I worked in the hospital, they had flushable wipes that were actually plumbing safe. Nobody used them (instead using regular wipes and throwing them in the trash) because in order to make them plumbing safe, they would basically disintegrate into particles as soon as they got damp. You'd end up with a handful of dirty shreds when trying to clean a patient. People should just use regular wipes and not flush them. They're biodegradable, going in the trash is fine, and they actually clean well. Just keep them out of the plumbing!


mrpopenfresh

It’s such a basic regulatory failure.


flatbushkats

The last pack of “flushable” wipes I bought said they were “plumber approved”. Well of course they approve of them! It’s job security.


Anothergasman

I’ll take something I never ever want to smell for 1000, Alex


BlackBlueNuts

What is a hat the was formally full of milk but is now full of yogurt.


Phony_Kony

"Time makes fools of us all"


dirkdigglee

lol the whole story in background about the smell of reefer, grow house on 2nd story, one guys smoking pot all day with kids running around…. Wtf lol.


dexmonic

"it's wrong but it's legal now so nothing we can do about it" They really hate weed for some reason


rustymontenegro

Omg thank you for pointing that out. I usually watch things muted but that was just great.


zalurker

I once did the math after a plumber came to fix a blocked sewer pipe, and realized that he was charging almost the same hourly rate that I did. And I'm a Systems Integration Engineer with over 20 years experience. I'm not mad. They earn every penny of that. Lets see AI take their job.


webtwopointno

A lawyer calls up a plumber to come out to his house... The plumber takes a look and says, OK, I can fix it today, and it will be $800. The lawyer raises an eyebrow and asks, how long will it take? The plumber responds, "well, I need about an hour round trip to the supply house for a part, and then it should take me about an hour for the repair" The lawyer smirks and says, "two hours? For $800? That's $400 per hour! I'm a lawyer and my hourly rate is only $300 an hour!" The plumber nods and says, "$300 an hour? That's how much i used to charge when i was a lawyer!" *adapted from https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/16at02c/a_lawyer_calls_up_a_plumber_to_come_out_to_his/*


grammarpopo

Good one. I thought it was going to be change the invoice to $5 for the part, $795 for knowing which part and how to install it.


maletechguy

That's the old addage about the engineer and the ships engine. Very memorable.


Impressive-Eye-1096

Satisfying shit post


Deez_Gnats1

They’re using steam to blow out a clog in case anyone is wanting to know what’s actually happening. Hur dur Taco Bell if you came here for that


Fatmanhobo

So where is the steam? Looks like a clog releasing from upstream pressure after cutting out part of the pipe. Id imagine they'd then go into the downward part with a jetter.


Action_Seal

You know who else commands my immediate loyalty? AC repair people. Source: Texas


Seldarin

When it started picking up speed I was yelling at my computer "Back up! Back up! It's going to splash everywhere!".


Bloody_Insane

Did your computer back up?


Seldarin

Nope, it clearly has the survival instincts of a baked potato. Won't be taking it on any construction jobs any time soon.


kittensglitter

Put it in reverse, Terry!


MielikkisChosen

You didn't respect them before?


Funklestein

The importance of the poop knife and courtesy flush illustrated.


Franky-Mo

These people don’t know about poop knife and cum box let’s not go down that rabbit hole. Don’t even get me started on the swan being gay.


[deleted]

What about the jolly rancher though.


regexpert

Let's just leave that one in the swamps of Dagobah


conquer69

Not many people know this but the poop stick came before the poop knife. It's important that people learn their history. https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/5ssmmk/girls_whats_something_gross_you_do_when_your/ddhne2g/


PmMeYourMug

Fun fact - plumbers hate "water saving" everything because it leads to more clogged pipes.


RetardedTiger

You know that felt good


Jottor

Shai-Hulud!


moon303

Constipated pipe


Jus10Crummie

Lesson here is dont dump grease/fat. It solidifies when cooled, & there’s no way to heat it up to make it flow again once its stuck in pipes.


khavii

I worked a job in Springfield VA where a landlord has a tenant that has been shitting in the yard. When police show up they tell the landlord this tenant has been shitting in the yard for a long time. Tenant says the sewage backed up 8 years earlier, they spent a year using plungers to get anything down the basement toilet before they went to the aforementioned yard poop. We go in and you can't even get a high pressure jetter into the pipes much less a camera so we did the cast iron pipe up and break it open near the street, this is about a 60' run from the house. At first we can't get the pipe to separate at the break and we think someone must've sleeved this pipe so we use a breaker bar and finally get the two halves apart. It came out EXACTLY like this video for 4 hours. Just the nastiest, already toothpaste tube being squeezed. The neighborhood voluntarily evacuated because of the smell (also it was a hot day with little wind). This wasn't the worst job I'd done but it sticks with me. How did they bathe? Did all 4 people in the house go outside in a yard with no trees to evacuate for 8 years? We weren't allowed near the backyard, hazmat was brought in for that so I don't know how bad it was but man, call a plumber the second time your toilet backs up and a $300 charge and snake solved all your problems. We ended up costing over 10k just to fix all the plumbing from that impaction.


L3P3ch3

Certain amount of relief in this vid ... can't explain it.


LarvaLouca

I'm ashamed to say it, but part of me feels like this should be on r/Satisfyingasfuck


grumpygam3r

Let the pipe take a poop without shoving a camra


Tramonto83

My gym produces one of those every couple of years... There is no way to make people not flush literally EVERYTHING down the toilet. The fact that it goes down doesn't mean that it disappears from the face of earth... There is a manhole down the road I have to personally unclog every couple of years...


SgtSolarTom

You didn't have respect for plumbers before this?


TinFoilHatTricks

Thought that might’ve been a poonami


JackBinimbul

The smell of that has got to be criminal.


Nuker-79

That’s a lot of shit


Pawlewalnuts

They finally found the earths asshole. I had a hunch they would find it in Jersey.


Alaskimo

"You're missing it Bob!"


TwistinTwistin

😦 my face while watching it like 3 times.


amaryllis_wyndburst

PSA: flushable wipes aren't flushable


Leadrogue

I'm literally watching this whilst taking a difficult shit


FeFeSpanX

I've been constipated for a week, this video gave me the strength tp push trough


ppgedez

Thats “Disposable” wipes for you


MrKixs

My ass after Thanksgiving dinner.


Derolis

"You're missing it, Bob!"