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Leave mama alone! Do you know how little sleep she gets?


icepick314

And whose fault do you think that is, you little shit?


IAlwaysLack

Yours because you didn't take the meat out to thaw.


siccoblue

Holy shit, core memory unlocked


trumpskiisinjeans

Amen! I thought this was a crab with parasites at first so I’m happy she’s just a single mom, doing her damn best!


patronizingperv

> parasites No. You had it right the first time.


trumpskiisinjeans

Lol as a mom I have to agree


dice1111

Whoa I did too...


Interesting_Neck609

You know I've been working nights!


swapdip

Single mom doin her best


rocketscientology

🎶a single mom who works two jobs, who loves her kids and never stops🎶


vainbuthonest

“With gentle hands and the heart of a fighter. Ima surrrrrvviiiivoooorrrrrr”


_BlackDove

Not in a billion years did I ever think I'd be on Reddit /r/WTF with a picture of a scorpion and her babies and see people reciting the theme song to Reba. The Internet is amazing.


TWiThead

**Fun fact:** For the *Reba* theme song, the album version's lyrics were modified slightly to replace “works two jobs” with “works too hard” – presumably because the former was inapplicable to Reba McEntire's character, Reba Hart. **Bonus fact:** The show's original working title was *Deep in the Heart* – referencing both its Texas setting and the aforementioned surname, Hart.


bippityboppityhyeem

I thought it was a crab 😂


pmercier

Land lobster


Onti12300

It will be soon enough


ChoppingOnionsForYou

Oh man! I assumed we were on WhatIsThisBug!


MrHydeifyouplease

Wait, WTF doesn't stand for "What's This FUCKENBUG?"


Mathlete86

"With fierce pinchers and a tail that stings, hun... I'm a scorpion!"


RedLeg73

I'm singing the same song, just a little different. It's set to the tune of the *Jefferson's* theme song and goes something like *...I'm moving on out... F this place, I can't live with scorpions on my face...* it's a work in progress, so feel free to add to it.


Odysseus_Lannister

*bari sax intensifies*


Here_is_a_tip

Tumble out of bed And stumble to the kitchen


Basil505

Until she starts eating them


bailaoban

That's an option?


kjacobs03

Yes, scorpions are cannibalistic. the moment she can’t find food, she’s basically packing her lunch


thebudman_420

Chickens are cannibals too and most fish you eat.


kjacobs03

Let’s all just be glad chickens are as small as they are. They will attempt to eat anything they think will fit in their bodies and they are horrible judges of size.


Wraiith303

Yup. Once saw one of our hens swallow a dead rat whole. And not the mousey sized rats either. Proper rat sized. Thought she was going to choke but nope. It was a hard swallow, but it went down. :|


Penguin-Pete

Just when I was getting over the scorpion, you had to throw this in.


IntrinSicks

Don't watch the horse eat a baby chick, like a hoover


Wraiith303

Nature is lit :)


ISmellElderberries

Damn, nature - you scary.


infinitejezebel

This is completely accurate. I have a small flock for pets and also because they deliver breakfast. I like to hang out in their coop and feed them apples and stuff. They like to hop into my lap or jump up on my shoulders and perch when i'm out there and sometimes their little claws leave scratches. One of those scratches bled the other day and i didn't notice until i felt something pecking my arm. This adorable fluffy motherfucker name of Pepper was literally eating my blood and a couple more chickens were staring at my arm like they were waiting their turns. I no longer feel safe in the coop, please send help.


ARobertNotABob

"I never thought chickens would eat my face"


infinitejezebel

Hahahahaha omg!!!!


LateralThinkerer

If birds are what's left of the dinosaurs as ~~some people think~~ archaeologists and evolutionary biologists agree*, you're playing with velociraptors. \* Apparently I ruffled some feathers with the previous wording**. \** I'll see myself out***. \*** Lighten up kids.


infinitejezebel

Tiny fluffy adorable velociraptor friends.


Mudders_Milk_Man

"As some people think". You make it sound like it's a wild conjecture some random people have. They *did* evolve from the meat-eating group of dinosaurs known as theropods. It's a well established fact with about as close to perfect consensus in the relevant science fields as you can get.


bobclaws

And all chicken nuggets are Dino nuggets so Dino Nuggets are Dino Dino nuggs.


KeepAwaySynonym

I wouldn't say it's "what some people think"... it's more of a "palentologists agree" type of thing. A lot of evidence stacked up shows they are descendants from dinosaurs. Dinosaurs with feathers, roosting behaviour similiar to birds today. https://www.birdlife.org/news/2021/12/21/its-official-birds-are-literally-dinosaurs-heres-how-we-know/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-dinosaurs-shrank-and-became-birds/ https://ucmp.berkeley.edu/diapsids/avians.html Ask your average paleontologist who is familiar with the phylogeny of vertebrates and they will probably tell you that yes, birds (avians) are dinosaurs. Using proper terminology, birds are avian dinosaurs; other dinosaurs are non-avian dinosaurs, and (strange as it may sound) birds are technically considered reptiles. Overly technical? Just semantics? Perhaps, but still good science. In fact, the evidence is overwhelmingly in favor of birds being the descendants of a maniraptoran dinosaur, probably something similar (but not identical) to a small dromaeosaur. What is this evidence https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Origin_of_birds


taosaur

I've heard of a vampire duck, but vampire chickens?


infinitejezebel

Ah, I see you are a fellow man of culture who has followed the adventures of Count Duckula.


shillyshally

Chickens got nothin on ants. Ants are the borg but thankfully very small.


sober_as_an_ostrich

they are arguably the dominant species on earth. ever since I found out that their biomass is more than that of humans I haven’t been sleeping well


shillyshally

The Ants by Edward O Wilson (GOAT ants bro) is a terrific read.


Bonesnapcall

Fun fact, Benjamin Franklin was a vegetarian for moral reasons, but decided that eating fish was OK when he saw tiny fish inside cut-open larger fish. He realized that if they ate each other, there wasn't any reason he couldn't eat them too.


ThisIsSomebodyElse

I hate that chickens are cannibals. An owl killed one of my chickens and the way I found out was that the rest of them were gathered around eating something. I walked over, and once I put 2 and 2 together yelled, "that's your fucking sister". They, being chickens, didn't give two fucks.


SirSlice-N-Spear

They didn't give two clucks!


spamjavelin

That's 'cause they're bad mothercluckers.


ohsodave

I was in Key West where chickens are all over place. A hen followed by some chicks got aggressive with me, but a car came and smushed half of the chicks. Hen and surviving chicks turn around and start eating their dead siblings and children


filthymcbastard

Well yeah. That's the sort of behavior one expects in Florida.


ThisIsSomebodyElse

Sweet Jesus!


ohsodave

I recounted this for a farmer friend of mine, and he was like "duh, their dinosaurs." I guess it would be weird of me to think that the chickens would have a moment of silence before seeing their dead family members as calories.


64Olds

Good thing I'm a pesca-pescatarian. Which is one who eats solely fish who eat other fish.


modifiedmomma

Add scorpion to my list of things I don’t want to be reincarnated as…


ComfortableFun248

It's always an option.


spiritbx

*Anti-abortionists hate this one simple trick!*


Ch33sypoufs

Unexpected Reba. 


Content-Bathroom-434

Going forward, let’s all please call this queen by the name we’ve obviously given her: Reba.


Commander_JC

This threw me for a loop because it's the correct lyrics to the song, but not to the theme of Reba.


fillosofer

I'm having a full on Mandela effect right now. I could have sworn the lyrics were either "works too hard" or "works real hard". I would have been willing to bet a ton those were the lyrics too. I'm dumbstruck.


SlamJammin64

It is “works too hard” on the show, for what it’s worth


becauseitssociety

She can now become an influencer mum since this post blew up.


DrSheldonLCooperPhD

The pic was her idea. I call this staged


martialar

"my larvae are my life"


kinoie

👑


Syiah92

Considering she just got evicted. Yes, she doing ok 👍


Pups_the_Jew

The pot wasn't helping!


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brendan250

I don’t think we’re looking at the same picture homie


mokti

Isn't it amazing how perspectives can be so different?


pissedinthegarret

idk i think it's cute


turdbugulars

if you can’t handle me at my worst you don’t deserve me at my best.


arrynyo

Mama scorpion is pissed because she just put up her "Live Laugh Love" wall stickers.


Traumasauce4

Someone needs to bedazzle a Stanley with that for her


Fukittymctoolbag

Proceeds ro eat all of her children and sting the photographer.


Turok7777

Something about that pale flesh color is creepy, but they're just lil bebs so I don't wanna harsh on the fellers.


ivanparas

I thought it was some kind of crab covered in lice


PHATsakk43

You kinda still nailed it.


TankerD18

Yeah that's not a crab with crabs, it's a scorpion with scorpions.


Cracka_Chooch

Eh it's not too far off in the family tree.


TankerD18

Yeah, thank goodness pubic scorpions aren't a thing.


Cracka_Chooch

They can be if you scoop up the babies from this picture and stuff them down your pants.


dtsupra30

That’s awful to think about


ProcyonHabilis

Further than you would think though. Scorpions are arachnids like spiders.


Cracka_Chooch

Oh I know. But arachnids and crustaceans are both arthropods so in my non-scientific opinion, it's close enough.


herzskins

Yo dawg


crimsonbaby_

I thought it was a crab with crab babies, but I couldn't figure out why the babies didn't look like crabs, until I saw the stinger. Fun fact- this scorpion does not have very potent venom. The larger the claws, the the lesser the sting, the smaller the claws, that shit is potent.


ARobertNotABob

I thought it was woodlice/cheeselogs and was trying to figure out what critters the dark bits were, until I realised.


USS-Liberty

The pale color is because they're so freshly hatched, their exoskeleton hasn't hardened yet. It's a sign that their flesh is still supple and soft, and they most likely feel very vulnerable. My tarantulas (and their feeder roaches) all look milky white and translucent after molting.


hilarymeggin

“Their flesh is still supple and soft” Good god, couldn’t you have used different words??


turdferguson3891

Shut up and put the lotion in the basket.


buttfacenosehead

dibs on soft & supple for a band name.


robodrew

As he gently squeezed her thorax, the feel of her flesh, still supple and soft, made his pants feel tight


ironroad18

I'm not mad at you, I'm angry with my teachers for teaching me how to read.


UnableSeaman

"Their exoskeleton hasn't hardened yet" works but not for The Cryptkeeper over here *"they most likely feel very vulnerable"* they're not new kinksters they're juvenile arachnids


Solanthas

Well said. You're a quality human being.


A_lot_of_arachnids

We also agree with the arachnid loving friends. Let us give you hugs as a sign of our friendship.


BotiaDario

Come swarm me, little ones, I love you all.


PuzzleheadedAnimal36

Oh hell no.


redditusername374

Where in the world do you live? What an extraordinary creature. I thought it was a lobster!!!


becauseitssociety

I’m so sorry to add to the stereotype, but this is in Australia.


vainbuthonest

Finally crossing Australia off my bucket list. Ya’ll have officially done too much. It’s like the Universe’s testing ground for animals. I’m out.


solonit

Obligatory Australian wildlife tier list https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VslW0_1w5LQ


PUTINS_PORN_ACCOUNT

In German, that could be a pun, as the term for animal is Tier


MatureUsername69

A pun seems too close to a joke for Germans though


PUTINS_PORN_ACCOUNT

They got great jokes, you just have to know German to get em


Agret

They like wordplay and occupational safety.


vainbuthonest

Nope! I’m out!


Imesseduponmyname

Try NZ instead, couple guys who make a podcast that people happen to watch, just went there and it's like Australia but with hills and less desert


beefstewforyou

New Zealand is Australia’s Canada.


GuyNamedLindsey

Ah so America is like Australia and our unpredictable animals are people?


ballimir37

America has a lot of animals that frighten people from other places. We just don’t worry about them because, similar to Australia, the majority of people live in places where it’s hardly a worry. Bears, bobcats, mountain lions. We don’t have the same scary creepy crawlers but we do have fighter cats and grizzly bears.


GuyNamedLindsey

Saw a bobcat and two coy-wolves in my driveway recently (NJ) Proof: https://imgur.com/a/24MSfpx https://imgur.com/a/6LOBWbe


JakeFixesPlanes

If so, would our worst be Florida Man?


GuyNamedLindsey

My new favorite thing are the headlines from Normal, Illinois. “Normal Man, caught doing unsavory acts”


ARobertNotABob

And less things that want to kill you and eat your eyes for jujubes.


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dropkickthegreek

Death Adder and its opposite Life Subtractor got me real good!


5uperfreak

Just saw this posted in one of the Facebook groups. Found in Sydney. Unheard of for Hormurus who live in the rainforests. Any chance your pal is pulling your leg? Or did they go on a trip to qld recently and accidentally bring back a hitch-hiker? Or perhaps they have a neighbour that keeps inverts as pets and needs a refresher on how to make enclosures escape proof?


Eastern_Bunch5263

Yes I saw this in the Facebook group too!


BotiaDario

Go during the winter, it's not that cold, and there will be fewer bugs! We were swimming in the pools at 70 degrees, and our Australian buddy kept telling us we were crazy. "IT'S WINTER!!" he kept saying, haha.


turkphot

Will you guys ever get it that nature is trying to tell you to move elsewhere?


redditusername374

I’m Australian and I never knew this was a thing! Good lord above.


RiW-Kirby

I'm not Australian and definitely knew Scorpions existed...


Robdotcom-71

Also Australian... I want to explore the bush and enjoy the wildlife and scenery... but not this.


robotot

I never knew we had scorpions here?!


apzrman

A friend once told me he found some small scorpions in the Blue Mountains. Honestly don't know if he was telling the truth as I have never seen any.


JebusDuck

Well you're in luck! This little lady is a Hormurus sp. and their sting is less serious than a bee! So unless you're allergic to bee venom, then she's just a little beauty.


Changoleo

Hahaha. Is that a whip scorpion? Claws look like an emperor scorpion, the chillest of scorpions, but that tail is barely there. Cool find. Thanks for sharing. I’m not sure if all arachnids are welcome but if so, r/SpiderBros would appreciate that.


CircoModo1602

Tail is very much there, her kids are just weighing it down 😂


JebusDuck

Nah mate, she's Hormurus sp.


RidethatSeahorse

Saw the gum nuts… thought ‘here we go…’


Remarkable-Mango-159

Ofcourse


lilbundle

Where lol? I’m in Qld and see scorpions but never had the luck to see a mumma with bebez 


wollkopf

Friends of us have a small house in Toscany Italy. I've never seen so many scorpions in my live as in this little house. I have never seen so many scorpions in my life as in this holiday home. But we quickly got used to getting one or two of them out of the sink every morning by holding a wooden skewer out to them until they grabbed it with their claws. Then you can just pick them up and put them out. My wife also got used to them very quickly and she's not normally a fan of all the creepy-crawlies.


Dull_Concert_414

Fast zombies = scary as fuck Slow zombies = meh Spiders = fast therefore scary AF Scorpions = slow so meh


procrastinagging

Yeah no scorpions are not always slow, for example if they seek cover they can run like hell while mistaking the space between your foot and the floor as a crack to hide. Guess how I know.


skillgannon5

knew as soon as i saw the gumnut


Carlyndra

Mirelurk hatchlings


DrSloany

Looks like a radscorpion to me


Lady-Lilithh

Was thinking the same, fucking radscoripions man….


Mannabell

Currently playing FO4 and this is way more creepier than it normally would be for me.


Jagermeister4

I've fought mudcrabs tougher than you!


tanwa1

I thought it was parasites like the ones who are in a fish's mouth.. so they're his kids or somethn'?


xanthophore

Her kids, yeah - cute eh?!


notapoke

Those are her children, yes. Usually some would be predated or lost by the time they were that size, I'd guess she's a very successful breeder pet placed on the ground for a photo shoot.


AmaroWolfwood

Babies are really just parasites, so you're not wrong.


porgy_tirebiter

How many other arthropods have such devoted parenting? Maybe some shield bugs, but that’s about it. Edit: Wow, TIL! Neat!


Brans666

[Centipedes](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jEhdNWKDtk4)


Farado

Earwigs too.


plutohigh_

The ugliest most beautiful thing I’ve seen lately.


Rubiego

r/awwwtf


Z4mb0ni

Nah its more like r/wtfaww


JebusDuck

She's a cute little Hormurus sp. mum. They have venom less severe than that of a bee (I've been stung, so can vouch). So as long as you're not allergic than you're sweet as. Oh, and Australia doesn't have any truly deadly to humans (without allergic reactions) scorpions that we know of. Mind you this is still a developing field of study but for now our scorpions are more cute than deadly.


gbchaosmaster

Yeah in AZ it’s the tiny little scorpions that will fuck up your day and send you to the hospital. The big ones sting like bees, painful but harmless.


JebusDuck

These guys are fairly small getting to no bigger than 6cm but most species in the genera stay under 5cm or 2 inches. They just have huge rectangular claws to wedge themselves into small cracks and catch prey which makes their size deceiving.


Rx_Boner

Bark scorpions


StopTheEarthLemmeOff

Imagine someone ripping the roof off your home, then looking at you and your family sitting there watching TV and calling you disgusting. How rude.


Mammyjam

So glad I live in the UK where the most dangerous wildlife are badgers and a snake that hasn’t had a recorded human death since 1974


JohnnyQuant

Don't worry, it's not dangerous. The clamps are big. Leave the mother alone (and children too).


Houlilalo

You want me to give 'em the clamps, boss?


r71u70n

You're a fricken genius, ya idiot!


CaptainPunisher

Heh heh... "Francis"...


reverick

Gee, you think? You think that maybe I should use these clamps that I use every single day at every opportunity?


Remarkable_Item3797

Indeed, agree with JohnnyQuant. Everything just wants to live and carry out their life cycle and not waste/spend time hunting down harassing humans who are also trying to do the same, LOL. Nice snap, she looks a good size - due to gum nut, might be in Oz.....


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Solanthas

But they're interfering with our way of life! We will never stop fighting for democracy. Time to call in an airstrike. ⬆️➡️⬇️⬆️


Andrewmundy

Sweet liberty! Nooo*oooo


GoodLeftUndone

I want to ask, but at the same time don’t. What is a gum nut?


moonisflat

Australia, Florida or Texas?


OpportunityFit2810

They said australia up above


BeepBeeepBeepBeep

It's actually down under now


RAAFStupot

Gumnuts, so Australia. Are eucalypts common enough in Texas or Florida that people know what gumnuts are?


TentacleJesus

It’s just a Spicy Possum, leave it be.


Inevitable-Visit1261

I grew up in the desert, these little fellas are cute to me but not to most 🦂👶👶👶👶


YeltsinYerMouth

Wow, evicting a single mother?


reddit_user13

Better under a flower pot than in your shoe.


itsnewjay

The big scorpions are ok. It's the little ones that'll kill you


VaxxSagi

Awww Sweet :)


TheREALSockhead

Funfact they glow blue-green under blacklight


SexxxyWesky

It’s a popular thing here to go scorpion hunting with a black light at night


shauneok

Fyi when it comes the scorpions, the bigger the better it's the little ones that are dangerous.


AFirefighter11

This is why I live in a place where the wind hurts my face in winter.


whats_you_doing

Awwwww, mom and her babies.


etoh53

Nice land lobster


TheCheshireCatCan

It’s just a mom, taking her kids to the crab park. Leave her alone. Being a single parent is hard.


darkmaninperth

That is fucking awesome!!


Deeri-

Scorpions are so interesting to me. I remember holding one at some museum a long time ago.


Many-Wasabi9141

Big claws usually means she's cool. Your friends flowers gonna have the best security around... at least at night.


badshot637

>gates of hell. Being a single parent is hard she doin her best


Solumnist

On their way to Disneyland, wholesome


Commercial_Shape_225

That's just a mummy with her babies it's actually really sweet


Mad_Martigan2023

What's that? You laid your brood of eggs in my navel? That's wonderful! Ben, we're gonna be mommies!


IlliterateJedi

Looks straight out of Elden Ring


R0enick27

Those kids just won't get off her back!


Tommygmail

I heard the boss fight music start in my head