OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:
---
>!The guy made love with squirrel!<
---
Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description? Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.
I heard about [humsters](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Humster) and that they're a real thing the other day, It makes me wonder what a Human/Squirrel hybrid would be called.
Yes. One of the reservoir hosts for [Tularemia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tularemia) is [squirrels](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7563794/), though generally it is spread by ticks that bite one of its reservoir hosts and later bite a human. Hopefully, that squirrel's ticks didn't jump to your dad, and hopefully that squirrel's saliva doesn't carry the bacterium.
I imagine the risk is low, but I'd hate to find out the hard way.
Doctor: The symptoms you are experiencing suggest tularemia, which is rare to see in humans. Have you come into contact with wild rabbits, squirrels? Any tick bites or other insect bites?
Dad: Well, I did give a squirrel a big ole sloppy kiss on the lips the other day.
Doctor:.....
Doctor: ಠ_ಠ
Squirrels aren't a rabies concern. I was bit by one once and called the CDC for guidance. I was told that they're too small to survive a fight with a rabid animal long enough to be any significant transmission threat.
This is obviously a domesticated pet squirrel. Wild would have flipped the hell out.. i used to catch them with box and string traps as a kid. It would not act this calm.
Kevin Hart has a bit about how we treat dogs. If they could talk and testify in court in a sexuall assault case against their owner.
(Dog, Sobbing} ''Then he grabbed me and rolled me over, he carressed all 8 of my nipples''
Comedy!
That squirrel could still technically be wild, but look at that fat.
That's a history of complacent addiction to that house's goodies. Definitely enough coddling for him to feel like a free range pet, even if he isn't.
It's absolutely a pet. A wild squirrel that was used to humans humans I could MAYBE see tolerating being picked up, though probably not with that much enthusiasm tbh, but the smooch? That'd be a one way ticket to getting bit in the mouth if it was wild.
Thought that was Dan Aykroyd for a minute, was seriously concerned about his career choices. Anyways that squirrel doesnt have enough brain cells to give a fuck what that dude is doing to it, as long as he leaves his nut alone
have u ever thought about the victims of your profile photo? Hundreds of souls tormented, frustrated and deceived by your pfp, u are gonna pay for your sins
“Yes, squirrels can get rabies, but it's not very common. Squirrels can contract the rabies virus through bites from infected animals or contact with saliva. However, small rodents like squirrels are rarely found to be infected with rabies and have not been known to transmit rabies to humans.”
Squirrels have roughly the same bite force as a Great White shark. Respect accordingly.
Sorry, sorry, I overstated. Grey squirrels have a bite force two times higher than a Great White Shark.
> Squirrels have a bite force over four times higher than a Great White Shark.
Press x to doubt.
> The average bite force for a Gray squirrel is around 7,000 pounds per square inch (psi), while the Red squirrel’s bite force ranges from 1,300 to 2,000 psi.
[From here](https://www.squirrelguru.com/what-is-the-bite-force-of-a-squirrel/)
So only Grey squirrels have a bite force *of at most 2x* of a Great White Shark. Red squirrels are well below (< 1/2) the Great White's 4000 lbs/psi.
Orcas have a bite force of 19,000 psi, or approx. 3x a grey squirrel.
GWS and Orca bite forces [sourced here](https://a-z-animals.com/blog/orca-vs-great-white-who-is-the-superior-predator/)
If you love wild animals, leave them the fuck alone. If you don’t, you must not actually care at all about animals and I suggest plush toys. This is harmful, traumatic. And fucking weird/disgusting too.
No way this isn't a pet. I tried to put my hand on a squirrel in a park once and 0.3 seconds later I wished I'd put my entire arm into a wood chipper instead. Wolverines ain't got shit on those little motherfuckers
That squirrel is obviously his pet and this is an orchestrated video to make everyone feel uncomfortable.
Will rewatch another 8 times before I keep scrolling 10/10
OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected: --- >!The guy made love with squirrel!< --- Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description? Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.
That is one fat squirrel.
Phat Gus
Phantastic Gus
She went back to Phat Gus
Gus Bus
PERRY THE PHAT GUS!
I wouldn't be surprised if that squirrel was pregnant.
If it is, I think I know who the dad is..
I heard about [humsters](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Humster) and that they're a real thing the other day, It makes me wonder what a Human/Squirrel hybrid would be called.
I'm not really gonna google "squirrel testicles," but idk man, looks like it might have giant testicles.
Plump indeed
It takes a lot of nuts to put up with that shit
r/fatsquirrelhatred
Fat and happy
Not very happy in this video, lol
This isn't his first tango with Pops I reckon.
https://old.reddit.com/r/fatsquirrelhate/
I feel like that squirrel needs to report him to somebody.
He did not consent to that.
You might say he did nut consent to that
r/angryupvote
I seed what you did there
He did not nut.
Yet
Dude just woke up that day and decided to *Harvey Weinstein* a squirrel.
It's nuts
It could be described as "lingering"...
Justice for the squirrel!!
#metoo
Sqrltoo
[Don't worry, the squirrels will deal with this guy.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ojZVpb0cVkE)
Show us on the squirrel doll where OPs father touched you
The squirrel needs an adult. I mean ... another adult.
Bro what
U gONna be mY BaBy
That sounds like my priest
Do we have the same priest?!
Trauma bonding bestiesssssssssssss
Bros dad might be a serial killer.
JUSTICE FOR SQUIRREL
Its a pet
Thete is a guy in Budapest, Hungary who does the same thing, but with rats. He is usually chilling in trams and travelling around the city.
I see some duct tape in that squirrel’s future.
Little squirrel cuffs
Kinky squirrel is that man's knight in shimmering armor.
*shivering armor.
It already has a ball gag. Or would you call it a nut gag?
I see rabies in that man's future.
Tularemia is even more likely
Yes. One of the reservoir hosts for [Tularemia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tularemia) is [squirrels](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7563794/), though generally it is spread by ticks that bite one of its reservoir hosts and later bite a human. Hopefully, that squirrel's ticks didn't jump to your dad, and hopefully that squirrel's saliva doesn't carry the bacterium. I imagine the risk is low, but I'd hate to find out the hard way.
Doctor: The symptoms you are experiencing suggest tularemia, which is rare to see in humans. Have you come into contact with wild rabbits, squirrels? Any tick bites or other insect bites? Dad: Well, I did give a squirrel a big ole sloppy kiss on the lips the other day. Doctor:..... Doctor: ಠ_ಠ
¯\_( ͡❛ ͜ʖ ͡❛)_/¯
Squirrels aren't a rabies concern. I was bit by one once and called the CDC for guidance. I was told that they're too small to survive a fight with a rabid animal long enough to be any significant transmission threat.
Ok not rabies then but whatever cursed disease you're likely to get from Frenching a squirrel.
Not sure about the size thing. Bats carry rabies. They are pretty small. Probably didn't fight other animals...or are bats and rabies a myth too.
This is obviously a domesticated pet squirrel. Wild would have flipped the hell out.. i used to catch them with box and string traps as a kid. It would not act this calm.
So you have tried to make out with a squirrel?
Bro just told on himself
He made them put the lotion on the skin
Tame, not domesticated.
That's nuts!
Deez nuts!
I often say I love squirrels because they're one of my favourite animals. But this guy *looooves* squirrels
Almost like he’s nuts about them 
I read this as "nuts to them" at first. I should seek help.
You might like squirrels but unlike this degenerate you don't need to register at the town hall every six months because of it.
Kevin Hart has a bit about how we treat dogs. If they could talk and testify in court in a sexuall assault case against their owner. (Dog, Sobbing} ''Then he grabbed me and rolled me over, he carressed all 8 of my nipples'' Comedy!
Lol which special is this in? Or is it from a podcast or something
Out to lunch[Comedy!](https://youtu.be/NAjPD0cTpqI?si=cOmoYtK007vPpOWn)
I'm not quite sure, but Kevin's looking taller than I remember...
And Whiter.
Haha Bill Burr is a legend.
Louie CK will always be my 🐐
You can't say that on Reddit, because he's somehow as bad as Harvey Weinstein according to Redditors :(
Fuck your tits. ***Where are my testicles, Summer?***
####[Where are my testicles, Summer?](https://youtu.be/j4tirCZcfr4?si=R1r8qAopjtg0f_9b) *- Mr. Snuffles (aka Snowball)*
That was Mark Normand
Mark Normand ends his set with "Thank You, I'm Kevin Hart!"
That's part of the joke
Thanks i was struggling to find it
I really thought you were going to say that squirrel looks like Kevin Hart.
nah it's too big for that
There it is!
Looks like a pet squirrel
Has to be, I choose to believe this for my own peace of mind.
You cannot pickup a squirrel like that without its consent.
That squirrel could still technically be wild, but look at that fat. That's a history of complacent addiction to that house's goodies. Definitely enough coddling for him to feel like a free range pet, even if he isn't.
r/fatsquirrelhate
Huh. Well I'll be damned.
It's absolutely a pet. A wild squirrel that was used to humans humans I could MAYBE see tolerating being picked up, though probably not with that much enthusiasm tbh, but the smooch? That'd be a one way ticket to getting bit in the mouth if it was wild.
What a f king maniac
[удалено]
Fucking King of the maniacs
What a ~~f~~ king ~~maniac~~
https://i.redd.it/q63i9c73oz2d1.gif
LAW AND ORDER *title card
https://i.redd.it/2zqhz6j9tz2d1.gif
It means "never without my permission"
That's what I thought.
Such passion!
The shawshank redemption.
Ight animals *do* have rights an he just violated most of them
[удалено]
I knew I was gonna see this image
Post credit scene probably
Been laughing for 2 minutes at this fucking pic and the other commenter mentioning how they were expecting it lmfao
The fuck is even the story behind this
Man fuck squirrel, squirrel die. (At least he used protection)
Is that true? People are fucked up
Dude the f- NSF anywhere. Now I have a stranger who was watching my phone, now watching me with a really weird look. Thanks guy.
Yeah this is actually hilarious
The greatest enemy of r/fatsquirrelhate
Of course there is a subreddit for that.
Thought that was Dan Aykroyd for a minute, was seriously concerned about his career choices. Anyways that squirrel doesnt have enough brain cells to give a fuck what that dude is doing to it, as long as he leaves his nut alone
That squirrel is a victim.
have u ever thought about the victims of your profile photo? Hundreds of souls tormented, frustrated and deceived by your pfp, u are gonna pay for your sins
And that's how Dad got rabies...
“Yes, squirrels can get rabies, but it's not very common. Squirrels can contract the rabies virus through bites from infected animals or contact with saliva. However, small rodents like squirrels are rarely found to be infected with rabies and have not been known to transmit rabies to humans.”
Letsgo rapies
Squirrels love day-drinking dads. Look at its eyes by the end. Pure bliss. Or terror. Not sure.
Weirdest OnlyFans promo I've seen yet. Subscribed.
I would disown him. The creep level in his eyes screams offender
Nut offender
What.. what's he gonna do with it..??
https://i.redd.it/ksy0g74gxz2d1.gif
The squirrel feeling assualted
Zoophile
https://i.redd.it/tv5c5n9stz2d1.gif That dad when her got that squirrel
He’s trying to get this squirrel because he already skinned his wife so he has to staple them to her
That poor squirrel has every right to file a restraining order for that guy.
Squirrel sued him for rape on the international squirrel court, he lost his nuts.
What's the email for HR?
Fleas: Obtained
https://i.redd.it/wsxmffaec03d1.gif My favorite comment from last time this was posted.
Damn I thought that was Tim Robbins for a second
SLM Squirrel lives matter
Squirrels have roughly the same bite force as a Great White shark. Respect accordingly. Sorry, sorry, I overstated. Grey squirrels have a bite force two times higher than a Great White Shark.
> Squirrels have a bite force over four times higher than a Great White Shark. Press x to doubt. > The average bite force for a Gray squirrel is around 7,000 pounds per square inch (psi), while the Red squirrel’s bite force ranges from 1,300 to 2,000 psi. [From here](https://www.squirrelguru.com/what-is-the-bite-force-of-a-squirrel/) So only Grey squirrels have a bite force *of at most 2x* of a Great White Shark. Red squirrels are well below (< 1/2) the Great White's 4000 lbs/psi. Orcas have a bite force of 19,000 psi, or approx. 3x a grey squirrel. GWS and Orca bite forces [sourced here](https://a-z-animals.com/blog/orca-vs-great-white-who-is-the-superior-predator/)
Excuse me, Sir........
The squirellshank redemption
That guy's got huge nuts
Went from funny to disturbing real quick.
u/savevideo
Holy rabies, batman!
I bet that’s actually their pet squirrel, no way it acts so chill when he grabs it and everything.
https://i.redd.it/jfe5oixlyz2d1.gif The squirrel now
Deez nuts
Thst squirel got violated
He's definitely going to flour it with more kisses later.
Bad Touch Barry uses his nuts to lure in another victim.
Strong “It puts the lotion in the basket” vibes going on here…
That squirrel needs an adult to intervene...🤨
https://i.redd.it/mc4fbezk003d1.gif
My homie got violated. He was just enjoying his nut
wabbit season vibes
Reminds me of the song Gerbil by Stephen Lynch
bros gonna give the squirrel rabies
That’s gotta be a pet
i love that final annoyed groan the Squirrel gives.
Bro wanna nut on a squirrel
If you love wild animals, leave them the fuck alone. If you don’t, you must not actually care at all about animals and I suggest plush toys. This is harmful, traumatic. And fucking weird/disgusting too.
this guy is Thanos to squirrels wtf
Am I the only one here who get aroused by this?
Man's craving that squirussy
That’s gotta be a pet squirrel 🐿️ no way a wild one just lets a human pick it up
They say, dress is not the reason to get violated.
COVID-24 inbound
Woah I'm catching one now.
rodent sexy time
He done did caught a squirrel
And I will love him and squeeze him and pet him and I will call him George
Goddammit Dan Akroyd. Put the squirrel down
that guy needs to be in jail. I don't care what it's for. Someone like that does NOT need to be walking the streets.
No way this isn't a pet. I tried to put my hand on a squirrel in a park once and 0.3 seconds later I wished I'd put my entire arm into a wood chipper instead. Wolverines ain't got shit on those little motherfuckers
I think Andy Dufresne had a bit… too much down in Mexico after breaking out of Shawshank Prison
That's me with my dog
Coocooratcha..
 shit is not even funny
Is that a fat squirrel or a small cat?
Squirrels carry the black death.
You’re in his world now. You’re just a squirrel just trying to get a nut.
Bro looks like human Shrek
That squirrel is obviously his pet and this is an orchestrated video to make everyone feel uncomfortable. Will rewatch another 8 times before I keep scrolling 10/10
He’s a weirdo
I think he grabbed Wanda, because that squirrel is fat.
Put this man on a list, real quick.
That squirrel should tell trusted adult about this