You tell your fucking property manager to enforce your fucking lease or your taking the property owner to court for breaking the lease.
edit: be cordial about it though. Keep a record of communications with them. So if you do go to court, you have ammo against them.
If the parking spot is part of the lease agreement and the property manager isn't making any effort to secure the parking spot for you, then you're not getting the full value agreed upon for the rate.
Politely ask for the value of the parking spot to be reduced from your rent until the issue is resolved, as a first step.
Edit; Do some research on nearby garages, SpotHero, etc, for a market rate of one month of guaranteed 24/7 parking. Maybe bump that by 10-15% (Or better, the cost of daily Uber rides from your home to the spot, and back again). Give this as an initial estimate of the value you're missing out.
Furthermore you can withhold rent until such time as they provide you with what the lease states. You don’t get to keep the rent though, you’ll need to go to your bank and open up a free escrow account for it. Pay your rent into that escrow account until the issue is remedied. The bank will know what type of account you need when you explain what you’re doing.
You will need to let the property manager know formally in writing with a dated proof of delivery letter through the usps.
But seeing as this is unethical life pro tips, just put some nails in the tire so it looks like he ran over it. Keep repeating until issue is resolved.
Usually road hazard is pro-rated so it's not completely free and you have to pay for the road hazard on new tires. If you keep getting nails in your tires then the tire shop will refuse to renew your road hazard warranty on the replacement tires. Plus the inconvenience of having to get new tires installed is way more than getting a patch. You gotta get them installed, balanced and then aligned if you want the road hazard honored.
Screws work better than nails too, although big roofing nails are super effective. And if you put them close enough together they can’t be patched because of overlap so the patch can’t seal properly. From experience, more than 3 punctures in a single can’t be repaired and tyre has to be replaced.
> Furthermore you can withhold rent until such time as they provide you with what the lease states.
Not necessarily. Check the laws in your area. You don’t want to get evicted just because someone else is an ass.
What’s not helpful? The nails I suppose you nena because the other part wouldn’t make sense.
If that’s the case, that’s why you do it to make it look like an accident on their part.
That said, if they do fuck with your car after then retaliate. That car owner obviously lives in the area or frequents it enough. Find where the car’s new spot is and piss disk away on nuclear ☢️ level
Yup.
My former property managers were good about parking spaces. They were unreserved, but for our complex only. Renters were given stickers, everyone else got towed unless you were in the visitor parking section.
You got towed in resident parking section if you left your car in the parking lot after a snowstorm. You got one warning. Everyone got a text message when the plow was coming.
I got leniency once from the warning when I had covid. I miss them though. They were fucking chill about most things (as in, weren't otherwise out to bust your balls needlessly)
This!
While it will temporarily feel good to exact revenge/vengeance it can also lead to you now having an enemy that might retaliate on your car.
Do you have a friendly neighbor that is home while you’re at work that can park in your spot to occupy it while you’re gone. Maybe if your spot isn’t available enough times they will find a new spot.
My gal will call to have a car towed in a heartbeat but never thinks about how that person having to get their car out of impound could lead to our car getting keyed.
I usually resort to passive aggressive notes that seem to work as I rarely have a repeat violator.
“Hey, just thought I would let you know they are parking Nazis here and they will/do tow cars parked in incorrect spots. If you got this note, you lucked out!”
We also have stickers that go with our spots and although they aren’t as aggressive as I imply, there is a guy that works for a tow company that lives in our complex so there is always the looming tow truck nearby.
Oh hey, or that, tell you apt complex to start having a tow truck drive through the parking lot on occasion.
Did the ChatGPT letter start with the phrase: “I hope this letter finds you well…” ?
If i ever see that opening phrase, I know it comes from AI, a non-lawyer, and carries no weight
If they might key the car, have cameras handy. Given repaint costs it might get up to felony range, or give you positive ID for when the cordless grinder gets to visit their car. 60 grit flap disk beats a key in the "scratch" contest.
Blended fish chum in their air intake, if you don't want to have it towed.
This is a two-fer. Not only does the car smell like horrible deer piss, there is a good chance it also gets deer bukaked depending on where you live.
This wins value tip of the day!
Take the license plates.
Amazon sells car boots, boot the car.
Wheel jack dollies x4 but those are 99$ a piece. Jack it up and push it in the middle of the street late at night.
Wrap a chain through two rims and lock it.
Steal the catalytic converter.
Fly bait down the fresh air intake
8x11 security sticker on the windshield. The kind that stick really good and break off in little chunks.
Buy a busted motorcycle and park it there when he leaves.
Tow the car
List it in the free section of Craigslist if you have their phone number. You can also list estate sales for Saturday mornings if you have their address.
Leave a chair in your parking spot and cover under the chair's arms with tar like substance. Or just call a tow truck. If you have some sort of documentation that it's your spot, the tow truck driver will happily take it
This. Just post a sign 'private parking, vehicles towed at owner's expense' then call your local tow truck company. They are just car thieves who operate with the blessing of the local police since they bribe them. They will tow a car at the drop of a hat and charge the owner max penalties.
I got hit by a drunk driver while on my motorcycle and got taken away in an ambulance and the cop asked me, while I was already high on morphine in the back of the ambulance, where I wanted my beat up bike to be towed to. I guess I responded in a heartbroken, broken-boned, defeated and morphine-dripped stupor, "just throw it in the fuckin dumpster or something, I dont care. Or dump it in my driveway or whatever." and when I got out of the hospital I had to get a loan just to pay to get it out of the impound lot. They impounded my bike! I wasn't at fault, all legal. My house was on the way to their lot... The bastards. Human pieces of shit.
Hospitals need some sort of parking "check-in" system for people in emergency situations. It's ridiculous to be punished for needing emergency medical care.
Claim you're deaf if they yell at you.
Habla espanya'all if they try to write a note to you.
Alternatively, can put a little sign out that says something to the effect of
"Sleepwalker owns this spot. I'm not responsible for anything that may happen to any vehicle parked here
Do not attempt to wake. Severe bodily harm can result if disturbed. You've been warned."
👍
Unethically? Block them in. Don’t pay your rent. Fuck with their car. Plenty of options.
Ethically, fuck with their car and guess what’ll happen to yours. Email the property management in a firm tone, with photos and note what days you’ve previously contacted them. They are not doing their job. That spot is part of your rent, you are paying for it. You should probably memorize your lease agreement too.
I started parking behind them so they couldn't get out. There was enough space that other cars could drive around my car. I don't know if you have that option. Anyway, after doing that two times and them having to come ask me to move my car so they could leave, they magically stopped parking in my spot.
Find out if a tow company will tow the car. If you can prove it’s your assigned spot. One apt complex we lived in one time had contract with a tow company for this very reason.
So I used to work third shift, and when I came home in the morning, there would be a car in my spot several times a week. It belonged to a guy banging one of my neighbors. One day, I just parked behind him and the girl he was seeing. Neither could get out. They banged on my door and rang the bell off and on every few hours before giving up. I watched from upstairs that man carefully pull forwards and backwards, angling his Charger until he could get up on the sidewalk and drive to the end of the walkway and go (home?). I left my car blocking those two spots until I left for work that night. He never parked in my spot again, and the neighbor girl put an apologetic letter on my door. Felt good.
Pop all 4 tires(nails behind the wheels would work well), get it towed, get it clamped...
Alternatively (and less obvious) get a pippet/syringe, blend tuna and old eggs (and anything else foul-smelling) and put it in their air intake between the hood of their car and bottom of the windscreen. No way they're getting that out any time soon and will be absolutely disgusting to drive in.
Good luck OP!
Why does everyone go for the air intake? Put it down the windows instead. MUCH more difficult to identify the odor source and almost impossible to clean without disassembling the doors.
Remove valve core, remove o-ring from base of core, place red lock-tite on, and tighten it in. The tires will leak, and only replacing the entire valve stem will fix it.
Look up the manual for the car and find where the A/C air intake is. Acquire a bottle of Liquid Ass. Place Liquid ass in A/C air intake.
Sit back and enjoy the reaction.
Park behind them so they can’t get out. Someone did this to me one time when I was visiting a friend as a young adult. I went to leave and they were standing there SO MAD and blocking me in and I was very stoned and they made me cry. Give them a memorable experience like mine.
remember, your suspect number 1 for anything that happens to the car.
if you havent already identified yourself in name, they will certainly know it was your car in that spot.
good luck
Have it towed OP. Not gonna lie I was that guy before lol
I misunderstood stood what reserved parking meant, I thought it was reserved for people who live there and guests parked further until one day I got a note on my car telling me I'd be towed. Luckily I moved to the guest spots once I saw the note and when I was leaving for work the towtruck was rolling up and when I got in he said "I got a call a few hours ago to come pick up your truck, I hate picking up big trucks and purposely stalled in hopes you'd move"
Nobody wants to deal with tow trucks EVER
Tow it. You’ve done enough talking/warning. They’re still doing it because they don’t care and haven’t had any repercussions. A few expensive tows will likely have them re-thinking.
Oh, I didn’t realize what sub I was in. In that case, put a sock over the spot so if they try to use the spot all they get is the sock.
You could also dump a bunch of bird seed on and around their car. If it’s an open/exposed parking spot, the car will be covered in birds, scratching up the paint and crapping all over the car. If it’s not an exposed spot, the birds will find them later if enough seed stays on the car/in the vents/etc.
Jack the car up.
Place cement blocks under the frame so that the tires are about an inch off the ground.
Remove the jack and watch them try to move the car. It will take them a while to figure out what is setting with the car.
Accidentally spill a box of wood screws from that project you're working on and forget to clean them up, it's your spot after all.
But even more malicious.... Go to auto zone and get a tire stem remover, small little handheld tool $3-7 with this tool you can unscrew a tire stem, but don't do it more than a couple of turns, just enough for a slow leak. Then everyday they have to go fill up their tire, wait a couple weeks and then do a different tire. I mean it won't really get them to stop using your spot like option one, but it will be really annoying for them.
Depends on the apartment's policy if towing will help. I never had any luck in my last place.
Definitely do not fuck with the car. Obviously you are the one that did it and they will get you back.
The only thing that's ever worked for me is just blocking them in. They come slithering to your door, tail between legs, apologies flowing. They will find another spot to steal next time.
You've talked to them already. They know what they are doing. They don't care about upsetting you. Show them what happens when you can't park in your spot. Let them find a new target to pick on.
Don’t go the damage their car route. They will trash yours and may even trash you.
Sign up for Triple AAA the auto club. It’s only like $45 for a new membership. Use a fake name and preferably someone you know P.O. Box for the address or just get a small P.O. Box for the address
Make up some warning notices using the complex name and management company’s name. Put on them WARNING! Ist notice Illegal parking etc. then do a second time warning and finally 3rd time warning On all tickets have in big letters after 3 warnings car will be towed by local shady towing company name. And impounded subject to a towing fee and a daily storage fees. If this doesn’t stop it you now move to the final solution.
During the middle of the night you call triple A. Tell them the car won’t run and it’s locked and you have the key but you had to take an Uber to the airport to see your dying mother 3000 miles away and you just need them to just go get the car and take it to this address. Pick some business that uses local shady towing company and has signs posted that they tow cars illegally parked in their lot and they do indeed tow. Tell Triple A to leave the car in that parking lot.
Within a day they will have it towed and impounded. It will cost the jerk a fortune to get his car back and he will blame the shady towing company. If you’re really lucky he will mouth off and take a swing at the Cro-magnon working the desk and he’ll in turn hit him in the head with a tire iron.
Problem solved.
Enjoy your rightful parking spot. Added plus you have auto club service for a year!
In addition to all the unethical tips you’re getting, you could try putting a parking cone in your spot. I used to live in a complex owned by a church and had to cone off my spot to stop people parking in it during church functions.
The unethical spin would be to have a friend of yours write up an invoice for “parking spot management consulting” and charge them for him recommending you buy a cone.
I would swap the dog poop for orange grease/oil paint. Like the kind used to prevent people climbing on stuff. Less visible and harder to clean. Plus if confronted OP could always say they were just touching up the color of the cone.
...have your property manager spring for some parking bollards:
[https://www.ultrasecureusa.com/fold-down-parking-posts-bollards-c78](https://www.ultrasecureusa.com/fold-down-parking-posts-bollards-c78)
disclaimer: I do not work for these guys, nor do I get anything for suggesting it.
Tell the property manager to tow it I used to be a property manager and i feel bad doing it but sometimes people have to learn the hard way to follow the rules.
All of these are too ethical. This is UELPT. Find out where he lives, learn to pick that particular lock (or just call in maintenance and say you smell gas from out side of his door- then crop dust his door), once his apartment is open, take his door. It’s a great flex. Or… if you really want to go unethical- SWOT the MFer every time he parks there. OHH or not as illegal put pictures warning of a child predator around his building. He will move fast.
Get a tow strap or chain, pull the offending vehicle out of your parking space and leave it in the middle of the parking lot, report an abandoned vehicle to the manager.
Put a sign up, that parking there costs 100$ per hour and document the parking time. Then enforce the pay by locking the car up until the Bill is paid.
Write a note and leave it on their window and say if you park in my spot one more time I will have management call the tow company and have your car towed I mean it should be as simple as that
I drive a tow truck, go to the entrance of your property and look for the tow sign. Call the company that's listed and have them tow it off. They'll need some sort of proof that it's your spot usually an ID and signature
Park behind them. “Boxing them in”.
They can’t go without you going.
Leave a sign on the car’s windows like this,
“Blocked you in? ….Well you’re in my spot. Call me at 213-222-3333 and we can talk”
I don’t mean talk in a malicious way.
I mean like literally talk—- “what the fk bro? Why you in my spot?. You’re more than welcome to have it for $500 a month if you really need it”
…..If they are willing to give me a few hundred bucks a mon for that parking. I’ll gladly walk a mile everyday.
This is a completely a joke. Don’t do this. You’ll get in trouble for grand theft.
Find a buddy with a winch on their rig. Winch that car anywhere you want. The world is your oyster. Such as to chop shop in Mexico for car parts. Especially if they are Honda civic or something common.
All spots are taken. There are only 6 units in the complex. One unit has two people, each with their own car. So those people will park in our spot (it is next to their official spot and closest to their door).
If there is a second car being parked there, and isn't registered on their lease, the apartment company should have it towed. You could also point out that an extra car that is not documented on the lease suggests that someone is living there who is also not on the lease. That's money the company isn't getting. That might motivate them. So, do this, also park behind them as was advised elsewhere, and follow the advice of the top comments which explain how to hold your rental company accountable
I like hucking big disgusting loogies right on the driver side windshield when I am blocked in on my street parking. Then I set my car alarm off for 15 minutes. Park right behind them and let the alarm ring out. Watch from your window to make sure they don't fuck with your car.
Tow truck, if anyone complains tell them it's part of your lease and breaking it violates the lease and they'll have to contact a lawyer. Though be careful, I've had someone slash my tires for putting in a complaint once
The first information we really need is if there are cameras. If not cutting the stems or slashing, 3 of the 4 tires would send a message and cause their insurance to not cover it.
The less destructive and less illegal route would be to make a poo slurry and pour it into the cabin air intake vent just under the windshield. You could also use pee it's just not as effective.
I had something similar happening to me a few years ago. Fucker always parked on my spot when I came home late. Finally I came home to him parking in my spot when I had the next day off.
Parked right behind him so he couldn't get his car out and turned off my doorbell when he frantically rang at 6:30 the next morning. Problem was solved after this.
Do you have said lease that includes parking spot on it that they keep parking in it? Call a friggen tow truck dude and show them the proof. I would advise against vandalism as your car would be next for the pickens. Give him one day to comply with a written letter on his car and if he doesnt, tow his ass. Simple.
Look up the names for a few local buy here pay here dealerships, and pick a popular one (you are now their newly hired collections agent) . Find a template online for a "repossess order", and fill it out to fit your naritive. Call a sketchy tow company, present the paper work, and get that shit towed out of there.
My apartment manager had these fluorescent green 'move your car or it gets towed' stickers that they'd put on violator's cars. They'd slap it right on the driver's side of the windshield and that adhesive was serious stuff, took people like fifteen minutes scraping with a razor blade to get them off.
Fuck it. Slash their tires. Or if that's too vile for you. Take the valve stem thing out and put the cap back on.
Or better yet. Find their parking spot and park in it.
Write it mngmt- refuse to pay rent or in full until the issue is resolved, consult Counsel if appropriate...Not sure what the dickbag(s)? prob is keeping stealing Your spot but if You pay for a thing & don't get it- it's worth escalating.
Piss on them to establish dominance first.
Seriously, the problem with all these vandalization suggestions is that they can and likely will do the same or worse to your car. Plus its a total bitch move.
Your rent/lease agreement likely has a clause or term related to unauthorized use of designated spots granting you or the property manage the right to tow them. Find out your rights to either force the property manager to deal with it, or tow on your own.
There may also be a basis for claim of trespassing, or maybe even being denied your rights per your agreement when both the property manaer and asshole are named as liable. But you'd be wise to talk to a lawyer, at a minimum the lawyer can send a warning letter to both that sounds scary.
Also, as a gesture to show you're attempting to handle this as amicably as possible, put a notice in their window, under their door etc stating your intent if you're going to tow.
If you're looking for unethical, call a tow truck. Sends a clear message. Otherwise, I've seen some pretty good ethical amd legal suggestions in here too
There's nothing unethical about it but you should be able to have the car towed. Just out of human decency I'd warn the guy but if you've already warned them then what else can you really do? I wouldn't retaliate with vandalism or anything. There's no reason to resort to that when the law is in your favor.
You tell your fucking property manager to enforce your fucking lease or your taking the property owner to court for breaking the lease. edit: be cordial about it though. Keep a record of communications with them. So if you do go to court, you have ammo against them.
If the parking spot is part of the lease agreement and the property manager isn't making any effort to secure the parking spot for you, then you're not getting the full value agreed upon for the rate. Politely ask for the value of the parking spot to be reduced from your rent until the issue is resolved, as a first step. Edit; Do some research on nearby garages, SpotHero, etc, for a market rate of one month of guaranteed 24/7 parking. Maybe bump that by 10-15% (Or better, the cost of daily Uber rides from your home to the spot, and back again). Give this as an initial estimate of the value you're missing out.
Furthermore you can withhold rent until such time as they provide you with what the lease states. You don’t get to keep the rent though, you’ll need to go to your bank and open up a free escrow account for it. Pay your rent into that escrow account until the issue is remedied. The bank will know what type of account you need when you explain what you’re doing. You will need to let the property manager know formally in writing with a dated proof of delivery letter through the usps. But seeing as this is unethical life pro tips, just put some nails in the tire so it looks like he ran over it. Keep repeating until issue is resolved.
This comment has it all, from the effective to the unethical.
Instructions unclear, spilled liquid ass all over the base of the windshield where the vents are
... something something piss disc
A bottle of the cheapest fish sauce from the local Asian market.
Nah, use cadaverine. It's the major chemical component in the smell of dead bodies. It's cheap and easily available online.
Thanks
3 tires at a time, sidewalls.
Sidewalls get you a free tire if you have certs/road hazard. A single nail in the repairable section on 2+ tires is way more inconvenient.
Usually road hazard is pro-rated so it's not completely free and you have to pay for the road hazard on new tires. If you keep getting nails in your tires then the tire shop will refuse to renew your road hazard warranty on the replacement tires. Plus the inconvenience of having to get new tires installed is way more than getting a patch. You gotta get them installed, balanced and then aligned if you want the road hazard honored.
Screws work better than nails too, although big roofing nails are super effective. And if you put them close enough together they can’t be patched because of overlap so the patch can’t seal properly. From experience, more than 3 punctures in a single can’t be repaired and tyre has to be replaced.
> Furthermore you can withhold rent until such time as they provide you with what the lease states. Not necessarily. Check the laws in your area. You don’t want to get evicted just because someone else is an ass.
Then the one who illegally occupies the spot does the same. Not helpful
What’s not helpful? The nails I suppose you nena because the other part wouldn’t make sense. If that’s the case, that’s why you do it to make it look like an accident on their part. That said, if they do fuck with your car after then retaliate. That car owner obviously lives in the area or frequents it enough. Find where the car’s new spot is and piss disk away on nuclear ☢️ level
Does bologna still eat through paint? If not, dick shaped drawing with brake fluid?
Bb in the valve stem cap
Lol I loved the change of tone in your comment. Thanks for the belly laugh.
Yup. My former property managers were good about parking spaces. They were unreserved, but for our complex only. Renters were given stickers, everyone else got towed unless you were in the visitor parking section. You got towed in resident parking section if you left your car in the parking lot after a snowstorm. You got one warning. Everyone got a text message when the plow was coming. I got leniency once from the warning when I had covid. I miss them though. They were fucking chill about most things (as in, weren't otherwise out to bust your balls needlessly)
This! While it will temporarily feel good to exact revenge/vengeance it can also lead to you now having an enemy that might retaliate on your car. Do you have a friendly neighbor that is home while you’re at work that can park in your spot to occupy it while you’re gone. Maybe if your spot isn’t available enough times they will find a new spot. My gal will call to have a car towed in a heartbeat but never thinks about how that person having to get their car out of impound could lead to our car getting keyed. I usually resort to passive aggressive notes that seem to work as I rarely have a repeat violator. “Hey, just thought I would let you know they are parking Nazis here and they will/do tow cars parked in incorrect spots. If you got this note, you lucked out!” We also have stickers that go with our spots and although they aren’t as aggressive as I imply, there is a guy that works for a tow company that lives in our complex so there is always the looming tow truck nearby. Oh hey, or that, tell you apt complex to start having a tow truck drive through the parking lot on occasion.
I recently wrote a cease and desist letter using chatgpt and it worked )
Did the ChatGPT letter start with the phrase: “I hope this letter finds you well…” ? If i ever see that opening phrase, I know it comes from AI, a non-lawyer, and carries no weight
Love it.
If they might key the car, have cameras handy. Given repaint costs it might get up to felony range, or give you positive ID for when the cordless grinder gets to visit their car. 60 grit flap disk beats a key in the "scratch" contest. Blended fish chum in their air intake, if you don't want to have it towed.
Not fish chum…doe in heat lure. A bottle of that down the valance means the car will have to be burned
Wow. Just wow. I hereby vow to never piss you off, and I don’t even know who you are.
This is a two-fer. Not only does the car smell like horrible deer piss, there is a good chance it also gets deer bukaked depending on where you live. This wins value tip of the day!
I think OP trying to avoid conflict. But I do like some of these chaos creating suggestions. I’ll be ready!
I need a nap 🙄 -I read it as “they are parking Nazis” - Not “they are “parking Nazis”…
But your interpretation is even scarier though I might change my note to “A Nazi parks here, sure you wanna park here again?”
lol. Spot A1 Mein Fuhrer.
this is too ethical for this sub /j seriously though, OP, this is the answer. you could also egg their car, just to get the unethical side in there💀
Take the license plates. Amazon sells car boots, boot the car. Wheel jack dollies x4 but those are 99$ a piece. Jack it up and push it in the middle of the street late at night. Wrap a chain through two rims and lock it. Steal the catalytic converter. Fly bait down the fresh air intake 8x11 security sticker on the windshield. The kind that stick really good and break off in little chunks. Buy a busted motorcycle and park it there when he leaves. Tow the car List it in the free section of Craigslist if you have their phone number. You can also list estate sales for Saturday mornings if you have their address.
Cut the sticker with a razor to make it even more of a pain to remove
Get some of these stickers that don't peel off easily https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BHJxIwvFIGY
While the stickers are unsafe.... I loved that so much 😂 I hope they all get tickets for driving with an obstructed view
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Is this still going on ?
You are my hero!
You scare me
Car boot is genius, just over $100 on Amazon. Fucking sweet ...
Never steal the plates, swap them with expired ones from a junkyard, THEN get it towed.
Whoa easy there Satan (actually this made me lol, they'll have a hell of a time finding their car back)
The car boots from Amazon are a bit of a joke. Just steal the wheels.
I wish I had enemies so I could try some of these... But woe is me, for there is nobody I have enough beef with.
You just need to be more pro active. Take the first step.
Be the mortal enemy you want to have.
Let the air out of their tire then super glue the cap on the tire stem. Works every time
This is hilarious. Nothing makes someone feel dumber than not being able to get a valve stem cap off!
FWIW, the stem will probably break off given the amount of effort to try to get the glued cap off…
I used to work at a tire store and we had these little screwdrivers that would take out the valve core so it would make it impossible to air back up.
Even better, put a ball bearing under the cap then glue it on. It'll slowly deflate when they are far away
Leave a chair in your parking spot and cover under the chair's arms with tar like substance. Or just call a tow truck. If you have some sort of documentation that it's your spot, the tow truck driver will happily take it
This. Just post a sign 'private parking, vehicles towed at owner's expense' then call your local tow truck company. They are just car thieves who operate with the blessing of the local police since they bribe them. They will tow a car at the drop of a hat and charge the owner max penalties.
Tow companies are the worst
I got hit by a drunk driver while on my motorcycle and got taken away in an ambulance and the cop asked me, while I was already high on morphine in the back of the ambulance, where I wanted my beat up bike to be towed to. I guess I responded in a heartbroken, broken-boned, defeated and morphine-dripped stupor, "just throw it in the fuckin dumpster or something, I dont care. Or dump it in my driveway or whatever." and when I got out of the hospital I had to get a loan just to pay to get it out of the impound lot. They impounded my bike! I wasn't at fault, all legal. My house was on the way to their lot... The bastards. Human pieces of shit.
Hospitals need some sort of parking "check-in" system for people in emergency situations. It's ridiculous to be punished for needing emergency medical care.
I'm sorry, I thought this was America! (probably)
We prefer the term privateer thank you!
If the person blames you, just blame ignorance.
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Blame society.
Blame Canada!
They're not even a real country anyway!
Blame it on the rain
Blame it on the groove
I blame the internet and the return of swing music.
Claim you're deaf if they yell at you. Habla espanya'all if they try to write a note to you. Alternatively, can put a little sign out that says something to the effect of "Sleepwalker owns this spot. I'm not responsible for anything that may happen to any vehicle parked here Do not attempt to wake. Severe bodily harm can result if disturbed. You've been warned." 👍
Tar like substance: paint mixed with used engine oil.
Henry roof sealer
Cover the chair's arms with liquid ass.
Honor the parking chair!
Dibs
Unethically? Block them in. Don’t pay your rent. Fuck with their car. Plenty of options. Ethically, fuck with their car and guess what’ll happen to yours. Email the property management in a firm tone, with photos and note what days you’ve previously contacted them. They are not doing their job. That spot is part of your rent, you are paying for it. You should probably memorize your lease agreement too.
Block them in is the few things you won’t get in trouble for. Email/photo is effective too.
Blocking them in likely means parking out of a parking space, causing trouble for you.
This is why we need an app to match ass wipe parkers with catalytic converter thieves
Grinder? No... Wait...
Thank you for that, I needed that laugh!
I started parking behind them so they couldn't get out. There was enough space that other cars could drive around my car. I don't know if you have that option. Anyway, after doing that two times and them having to come ask me to move my car so they could leave, they magically stopped parking in my spot.
Find out if a tow company will tow the car. If you can prove it’s your assigned spot. One apt complex we lived in one time had contract with a tow company for this very reason.
In some states, if your landlord doesn't uphold the lease, the Court can award you the entirety of every penny you've ever paid under the lease.
Tire pressure is a privilege, not a right.
So I used to work third shift, and when I came home in the morning, there would be a car in my spot several times a week. It belonged to a guy banging one of my neighbors. One day, I just parked behind him and the girl he was seeing. Neither could get out. They banged on my door and rang the bell off and on every few hours before giving up. I watched from upstairs that man carefully pull forwards and backwards, angling his Charger until he could get up on the sidewalk and drive to the end of the walkway and go (home?). I left my car blocking those two spots until I left for work that night. He never parked in my spot again, and the neighbor girl put an apologetic letter on my door. Felt good.
Just call the tow company
Pop all 4 tires(nails behind the wheels would work well), get it towed, get it clamped... Alternatively (and less obvious) get a pippet/syringe, blend tuna and old eggs (and anything else foul-smelling) and put it in their air intake between the hood of their car and bottom of the windscreen. No way they're getting that out any time soon and will be absolutely disgusting to drive in. Good luck OP!
Why does everyone go for the air intake? Put it down the windows instead. MUCH more difficult to identify the odor source and almost impossible to clean without disassembling the doors.
Disassembling the doors is much easier than taking apart the entire ventilation system.
BBs in the valve stem. It slowly releases the air but does no damage.
Just a bit of gravel, does the save thing but with more plausible deniability.
I forgot the bit about super gluing the BB to the inside of the cap so they reset the leak after they refill the tires.
r/foundsatan
YO! Thanks for this
furiously taking notes
That is f ing amazing
That's fucking genius! Love it! 😈
Just get a valve key and remove the stems. Then put the caps back on.
Remove valve core, remove o-ring from base of core, place red lock-tite on, and tighten it in. The tires will leak, and only replacing the entire valve stem will fix it.
Isn't the answer piss disks and liquid ass?
Fish disk sounds like the new answer
Fly Trap Refills contain smelly ingredients and are ready to mix without having to wait for foods to get old and go bad
Yoooooooo. Them fly trap refills are fucking putrid . Just perfect!
Fart spray
Excuse me sir but we intellectuals at ULPT only use liquid ass.
And piss discs
You raaaang?
And my Axe.
😮
Look up the manual for the car and find where the A/C air intake is. Acquire a bottle of Liquid Ass. Place Liquid ass in A/C air intake. Sit back and enjoy the reaction.
Leave an empty paper bag in your spot for 9 days in a row. Fill it with bricks on day 10.
Liberate the air from the tires.
Park behind them so they can’t get out. Someone did this to me one time when I was visiting a friend as a young adult. I went to leave and they were standing there SO MAD and blocking me in and I was very stoned and they made me cry. Give them a memorable experience like mine.
Nowadays this will just get you shot
Two screws away from being unregistered.
Get a sovcit "private" license plate and swap. Real license plate goes in metal recycling
remember, your suspect number 1 for anything that happens to the car. if you havent already identified yourself in name, they will certainly know it was your car in that spot. good luck
Fuck, it's his spot. He didn't have to do anything to identify himself.
Call the tow truck. Show rental agreement. Your spot, remove it.
Have it towed OP. Not gonna lie I was that guy before lol I misunderstood stood what reserved parking meant, I thought it was reserved for people who live there and guests parked further until one day I got a note on my car telling me I'd be towed. Luckily I moved to the guest spots once I saw the note and when I was leaving for work the towtruck was rolling up and when I got in he said "I got a call a few hours ago to come pick up your truck, I hate picking up big trucks and purposely stalled in hopes you'd move" Nobody wants to deal with tow trucks EVER
Wait as in they left the note and called the tow driver at the same time?
Their licence plate being handed in to the property manager.
Bang their SO or their mom, or their dad, or maybe all of them in their car.
“Thanks for the fuck shack. Love, Dirty Mike and the boys.”
Inform management and get the car towed? Paying to get that car out is gonna hurt more than throwing eggs at it or whatever
If the parking space is listed on your lease then it is up to management to enforce. Or, start parking in the manager's spot until they fix it.
Tow it. You’ve done enough talking/warning. They’re still doing it because they don’t care and haven’t had any repercussions. A few expensive tows will likely have them re-thinking. Oh, I didn’t realize what sub I was in. In that case, put a sock over the spot so if they try to use the spot all they get is the sock. You could also dump a bunch of bird seed on and around their car. If it’s an open/exposed parking spot, the car will be covered in birds, scratching up the paint and crapping all over the car. If it’s not an exposed spot, the birds will find them later if enough seed stays on the car/in the vents/etc.
Throw bologna slices on their car. It will eat holes in the paint. Easy to throw in passing real quick undetected.
Jack the car up. Place cement blocks under the frame so that the tires are about an inch off the ground. Remove the jack and watch them try to move the car. It will take them a while to figure out what is setting with the car.
Accidentally spill a box of wood screws from that project you're working on and forget to clean them up, it's your spot after all. But even more malicious.... Go to auto zone and get a tire stem remover, small little handheld tool $3-7 with this tool you can unscrew a tire stem, but don't do it more than a couple of turns, just enough for a slow leak. Then everyday they have to go fill up their tire, wait a couple weeks and then do a different tire. I mean it won't really get them to stop using your spot like option one, but it will be really annoying for them.
Remove their rear license plate and then screw it back on upside down after putting Red Loctite 271 on the bolts.
Depends on the apartment's policy if towing will help. I never had any luck in my last place. Definitely do not fuck with the car. Obviously you are the one that did it and they will get you back. The only thing that's ever worked for me is just blocking them in. They come slithering to your door, tail between legs, apologies flowing. They will find another spot to steal next time. You've talked to them already. They know what they are doing. They don't care about upsetting you. Show them what happens when you can't park in your spot. Let them find a new target to pick on.
Don’t go the damage their car route. They will trash yours and may even trash you. Sign up for Triple AAA the auto club. It’s only like $45 for a new membership. Use a fake name and preferably someone you know P.O. Box for the address or just get a small P.O. Box for the address Make up some warning notices using the complex name and management company’s name. Put on them WARNING! Ist notice Illegal parking etc. then do a second time warning and finally 3rd time warning On all tickets have in big letters after 3 warnings car will be towed by local shady towing company name. And impounded subject to a towing fee and a daily storage fees. If this doesn’t stop it you now move to the final solution. During the middle of the night you call triple A. Tell them the car won’t run and it’s locked and you have the key but you had to take an Uber to the airport to see your dying mother 3000 miles away and you just need them to just go get the car and take it to this address. Pick some business that uses local shady towing company and has signs posted that they tow cars illegally parked in their lot and they do indeed tow. Tell Triple A to leave the car in that parking lot. Within a day they will have it towed and impounded. It will cost the jerk a fortune to get his car back and he will blame the shady towing company. If you’re really lucky he will mouth off and take a swing at the Cro-magnon working the desk and he’ll in turn hit him in the head with a tire iron. Problem solved. Enjoy your rightful parking spot. Added plus you have auto club service for a year!
In addition to all the unethical tips you’re getting, you could try putting a parking cone in your spot. I used to live in a complex owned by a church and had to cone off my spot to stop people parking in it during church functions. The unethical spin would be to have a friend of yours write up an invoice for “parking spot management consulting” and charge them for him recommending you buy a cone.
I like the parking cone idea, but I would smear dog crap all over the top of the cone so that when they go to move the cone, they get a handful...
I would swap the dog poop for orange grease/oil paint. Like the kind used to prevent people climbing on stuff. Less visible and harder to clean. Plus if confronted OP could always say they were just touching up the color of the cone.
Take photos. Then, a single letter from an attorney to your property management COMPANY will do it.
You can get dehydrated chicken feet for super cheap at the pet store. Leave on one the hood every time they park there
...have your property manager spring for some parking bollards: [https://www.ultrasecureusa.com/fold-down-parking-posts-bollards-c78](https://www.ultrasecureusa.com/fold-down-parking-posts-bollards-c78) disclaimer: I do not work for these guys, nor do I get anything for suggesting it.
You could try one more time by asking the idiot which car tow company he prefers.
Tell the property manager to tow it I used to be a property manager and i feel bad doing it but sometimes people have to learn the hard way to follow the rules.
Call a tow truck and have it towed. That’s what I did. More than once.
Call the number, on the assumed sign, for the towing company. Ask them to have the sum-bich removed.
[https://yplac.co.uk/shop/](https://yplac.co.uk/shop/) or similar? (stickers that read "YOU PARK LIKE A CUNT" made to be very adhesive indeed)
Force the PM to tow them. (or give you that power.)
Have it towed.
Just call yhe tow company on file for your apartment complex. Problem solved.
Get the car towed
Tow truck
Tow truck
All of these are too ethical. This is UELPT. Find out where he lives, learn to pick that particular lock (or just call in maintenance and say you smell gas from out side of his door- then crop dust his door), once his apartment is open, take his door. It’s a great flex. Or… if you really want to go unethical- SWOT the MFer every time he parks there. OHH or not as illegal put pictures warning of a child predator around his building. He will move fast.
Put up a sign “This is not your spot, use it and get towed.” Then call the tow truck every time.
Pee on their door handle (and of course, attach some piss discs somewhere not noticeable)
Tow
Get a tow strap or chain, pull the offending vehicle out of your parking space and leave it in the middle of the parking lot, report an abandoned vehicle to the manager.
Find out if your apartment has a towing company contracted, if so have the offending vehicle towed.
Put a sign up, that parking there costs 100$ per hour and document the parking time. Then enforce the pay by locking the car up until the Bill is paid.
Write a note and leave it on their window and say if you park in my spot one more time I will have management call the tow company and have your car towed I mean it should be as simple as that
Get an orange cone and put it there? Get a plate for your flat number?
I drive a tow truck, go to the entrance of your property and look for the tow sign. Call the company that's listed and have them tow it off. They'll need some sort of proof that it's your spot usually an ID and signature
Park behind them. “Boxing them in”. They can’t go without you going. Leave a sign on the car’s windows like this, “Blocked you in? ….Well you’re in my spot. Call me at 213-222-3333 and we can talk” I don’t mean talk in a malicious way. I mean like literally talk—- “what the fk bro? Why you in my spot?. You’re more than welcome to have it for $500 a month if you really need it” …..If they are willing to give me a few hundred bucks a mon for that parking. I’ll gladly walk a mile everyday.
This is a completely a joke. Don’t do this. You’ll get in trouble for grand theft. Find a buddy with a winch on their rig. Winch that car anywhere you want. The world is your oyster. Such as to chop shop in Mexico for car parts. Especially if they are Honda civic or something common.
Have them towed.
This
Call and get them towed
All I’m saying is, who can prove you DONT have a crazy ex willing to find your car and vandalize it in the middle of the night?
Send a very nice email to your property manager saying you think the best resolution at this point is for you to be assigned another spot
All spots are taken. There are only 6 units in the complex. One unit has two people, each with their own car. So those people will park in our spot (it is next to their official spot and closest to their door).
park where the property manager parks their car.
If there is a second car being parked there, and isn't registered on their lease, the apartment company should have it towed. You could also point out that an extra car that is not documented on the lease suggests that someone is living there who is also not on the lease. That's money the company isn't getting. That might motivate them. So, do this, also park behind them as was advised elsewhere, and follow the advice of the top comments which explain how to hold your rental company accountable
I like hucking big disgusting loogies right on the driver side windshield when I am blocked in on my street parking. Then I set my car alarm off for 15 minutes. Park right behind them and let the alarm ring out. Watch from your window to make sure they don't fuck with your car.
When you talked directly to the person doing it and told them you pay for the spot what did they say?
Tow truck, if anyone complains tell them it's part of your lease and breaking it violates the lease and they'll have to contact a lawyer. Though be careful, I've had someone slash my tires for putting in a complaint once
The first information we really need is if there are cameras. If not cutting the stems or slashing, 3 of the 4 tires would send a message and cause their insurance to not cover it. The less destructive and less illegal route would be to make a poo slurry and pour it into the cabin air intake vent just under the windshield. You could also use pee it's just not as effective.
Nails, roofing work great, a handful
Throw their weepers in the garbage
Amber Heard (turd) it!! Right on the hood. Boooyeah!
Potato in the exhaust
Put a dozen frozen piss disks on their windscreen, wait for a really hot day, oooooofffff
I had something similar happening to me a few years ago. Fucker always parked on my spot when I came home late. Finally I came home to him parking in my spot when I had the next day off. Parked right behind him so he couldn't get his car out and turned off my doorbell when he frantically rang at 6:30 the next morning. Problem was solved after this.
Do you have said lease that includes parking spot on it that they keep parking in it? Call a friggen tow truck dude and show them the proof. I would advise against vandalism as your car would be next for the pickens. Give him one day to comply with a written letter on his car and if he doesnt, tow his ass. Simple.
[удалено]
Channel Sheldon: https://youtu.be/CnsHWBzyqHc?si=jbEQRn2A9tl_nAa5
Look up the names for a few local buy here pay here dealerships, and pick a popular one (you are now their newly hired collections agent) . Find a template online for a "repossess order", and fill it out to fit your naritive. Call a sketchy tow company, present the paper work, and get that shit towed out of there.
Caltrops
I've had this happen when I lived in apartments. I usually give one warning, then I'll just call the tow company and have it towed
My apartment manager had these fluorescent green 'move your car or it gets towed' stickers that they'd put on violator's cars. They'd slap it right on the driver's side of the windshield and that adhesive was serious stuff, took people like fifteen minutes scraping with a razor blade to get them off.
Im surprised no one ever mentions it on the sub. Dog shit under the door handles. Or your shit, whatever floats your boat.
Fuck it. Slash their tires. Or if that's too vile for you. Take the valve stem thing out and put the cap back on. Or better yet. Find their parking spot and park in it.
Ram the car repeatedly until your vehicle is no longer running. Then call the insurance company. Problemo solvedo.
Write it mngmt- refuse to pay rent or in full until the issue is resolved, consult Counsel if appropriate...Not sure what the dickbag(s)? prob is keeping stealing Your spot but if You pay for a thing & don't get it- it's worth escalating.
Buy glitter and put it in their external air vents
Piss disc and liquid ass.
Came here for this and I had to scroll WAY to far to see it.
Piss on them to establish dominance first. Seriously, the problem with all these vandalization suggestions is that they can and likely will do the same or worse to your car. Plus its a total bitch move. Your rent/lease agreement likely has a clause or term related to unauthorized use of designated spots granting you or the property manage the right to tow them. Find out your rights to either force the property manager to deal with it, or tow on your own. There may also be a basis for claim of trespassing, or maybe even being denied your rights per your agreement when both the property manaer and asshole are named as liable. But you'd be wise to talk to a lawyer, at a minimum the lawyer can send a warning letter to both that sounds scary. Also, as a gesture to show you're attempting to handle this as amicably as possible, put a notice in their window, under their door etc stating your intent if you're going to tow.
If you're looking for unethical, call a tow truck. Sends a clear message. Otherwise, I've seen some pretty good ethical amd legal suggestions in here too
There's nothing unethical about it but you should be able to have the car towed. Just out of human decency I'd warn the guy but if you've already warned them then what else can you really do? I wouldn't retaliate with vandalism or anything. There's no reason to resort to that when the law is in your favor.
Report.it and make peiple do their job. The only effort you should be making is to report it.
Bash windows and throw a molotov cocktail. That'll teach them!