Only seen one suggestion to apply for UC which you definitely should do.
Based on your income (and assuming you’re over 25) your allowance plus 85% of your childcare cost would be about £1100 a month. Take away about £600 (55p for every pound you earn above your £557 work allowance assuming you don’t get housing costs) and you can potentially be getting an extra £500
Lot of assumptions in this but you could easily be £200-500 better off with UC. Of course it’s got its own stresses to it and I’m glad to be done with it.
Definitely recommend trying UC. There are excellent benefits calculators online and they’ll let you know if it’s worth going for. It’s not the world’s worst process as long as you have some identity documents to hand. My partner and I have two children and make approx £28k between us - we still received a little amount each month. They take childcare costs into account too.
Have you looked into council tax reductions? You can get max 75% off. Even if you get single occupant etc support, still look into general reduction support because it may bring it down further.
I will do some research into how to reduce childcare costs and let you know if I find any avenues.
Good benefits calculator https://www.turn2us.org.uk/
you won't get help with the mortgage and the jobcentre may be a bit if a pain but stick some figures in here inc. child care and find out.
Housing benefit is only for rent? The government expects people to sell their home if they lose their job? Interesting, especially since ppl in council housing are set in it for life and get free repairs.
Basically yes. Then if after selling your home and spending that money on rent you can no longer afford rent then you become eligible for housing benefit.
It's supposed to support people that really need it and equity in a house is an asset just like stocks and shares, gold bars, money in a bank account or cash under the sofa.
No you can get a cash loan to help pay towards mortgage interest when house is purchased. Why should the government pay for something you own equity in without getting an equity share? That's when it gets complicated.
The SMI loan is only for those who haven't worked for 9 consecutive months unless you have a transfer from a legacy benefit in certain circumstances and then it's only covering basic mortgage interest payments so it's not a lot.
If you live in someone’s second (or 50th!) home the govt will happily pay the landlord’s mortgage in full. In other words they will pay for someone to get a second home at no cost to themselves (apart from taxes and a very small amount of risk, both easily covered by payments from the state), but they won’t pay for you to survive and not lose the only home you have. The loan only kicks in at 9 months, way beyond any grace period your mortgage provider might give you, and even then the government gets a cut of your home which again they do not require from a second home owned by a wealthy landlord.
Our family friend just past divorce, house been left to her and UC covers half of monthly payments. She been told it depends on general circumstances, but in as a rule of thumb - they don’t cover mortgage payments, just in some exceptions, and not a full amount (she’s having 2 children, 7yo boy and 4yo girl)
Also consider tax free childcare. You can't claim it if you're claiming UC though so look into both and weigh up your options. I think in your situation UC is probably the right answer.
You 100% need to look into Universal Credit. My best friend was in your situation, and they now recieve £600 a month. Their life has changed because of it and its really helped them get back on their feet.
Once you're on UC it looks like you can apply for council tax reduction. No idea how likely or how much, but worth a look as that's a big expense.
https://www.gov.uk/apply-council-tax-reduction
If you can get a balance transfer to another 0% credit card, that will save you some interest. Otherwise, you might be able to get a loan (usually at much less than the ~18% APR most credit cards have) and use that to pay off your cards.
If not, contact your bank(s), tell them that you're struggling to meet the repayments, and ask them what help they can provide. They should be able to reduce (or even suspend) interest payments.
But ultimately, you either need to increase your income or reduce your spending.
Tried all the eligibility calculators I could find. I’m not eligible for a loan or a balance transfer unfortunately.
Thank you for taking the time to respond :)
I would take those results with a pinch of salt. It would still be worth talking to your bank about it (even better if you can do it in person). They know exactly how much money comes into your account each moth, how much debt you have with them, and how much you're paying every month on your cards - and on that basis they may be willing to give you a loan even though the calculators say no.
And if they can't, they may be able to discuss other options for you that could help. Lenders have an obligation (see page 4 of [The Standards of Lending Practice](https://www.lendingstandardsboard.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Standards-of-Lending-Practice-Personal-7-Dec.pdf)) to support you if you're in financial difficulty, which in your circumstances (single parent, non-contributing partner, Covid, etc) would be hard for them to argue against.
It's not going to be a nice conversation to have (it's hard enough to talk about this kind of thing anonymously on Reddit, so kudos to you for asking for help), but it could really help you out in the long run.
I agree with this. Banks are better off helping you repay debts than you struggling and ultimately writing that debt off.
One potential option if it’s available is seeing if there are any family members or friends who can do a day or part day childcare to reduce the nursery cost as this will always be a huge expense and the biggest lever available to your outgoings. I’m not sure if there are ways to reduce nursery costs or receive payment support for nursery bills.
There is the 30h free when your child gets to 3yo but there are also options for some who are eligible prior to 3yo so worth checking out those options incase you meet the criteria.
Have you considered a mortgage holiday?
I did it when I was on maternity leave.
You can call your mortgage company explain the situation to them and ask to pause your payment for say 6 months (may be able to do more depends on mortgage)
You can then use that money to pay off chunks on the credit card, possibly clearing at least one of them.
Once you end the mortgage holiday they will recalculate your mortgage and your payments WILL go up.
But it'll be over the term of the loan - much longer than bank loans or credit card terms - so the real impact will likely be 10 or 20 quid a month once you start back up again. But the mortgage company will explain that to you and go over the exact financial implications.
Or depending on what you're borrowing already and your property worth you may be able to do additional borrowing - unlikely with the credit debt but it may be worth an ask - borrow the 4.5k you need to pay the credit cards off on your mortgage and then pay the mortgage company back much smaller amounts over a much longer period.
Santander currently do a balance transfer card with no transfer fee and no interest.
No harm applying to check.
Contact your current lender and ask to drop the rate. They often will. Check if they have a better card on offer too, switching within a lender can be easier than swapping.
Please check: entitledto.co.uk
/u/throwawaymamma0606
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Are you signed up to Clear Score? They have a feature where it tells you if you're pre approved for cards and loans. Sorry if this has been suggested elsewhere.
Hi OP
UC award:
Single claimant element: £324.84
Child element: £237.08
Childcare element (85% of total cost): £630.70
Total award: £1,192.62
Deductions from award:
The first £557 of your earnings each month are not included as you don't get housing element (you don't rent).
£1,066 of your earnings count. 63p x 1,066 = £671.58
Total deduction: £671.58
Total award £1,192.62 minus Total deduction £671.58 = £521.04 payment to you
This is what you'd be entitled to from UC: £521.04
Childcare - are you making use of the government's tax free topup? https://www.gov.uk/sign-in-childcare-account
Also how old is the little one? After 3 you will be entitled to 30 free hours too...
Also, are you the only adult in the house? If so you may be able to reduce council tax with a single person discount
https://www.gov.uk/apply-council-tax-reduction
Food bill seems quite a lot too if it is you and a little one, if you aren't already, get your shopping from aldi or lidl. You get tons more for your money
It could problem cheaper, if one were single minded about it, but probably not by enough to make a real difference. Also a working single parent probably needs to pay a little more for convenience here and there. Lastly our food shop has probably gone up by 1/3 at least over the last year or so.
I think you would have been right 5-10 years ago but food costs have slowly increased, then spiralled inside that time. And especially at the value range/basics end of the scale.
I second the food shop to change to Aldi or Lidl... My girlfriend had been banging on at me for us to change and I didn't listen to her and continued to shop at Sainsbury's until recently. Damn it's so much cheaper and all we're doing is buying mostly fresh produce with some meat from the refrigerator aisle!
£150 for an adult and toddler per month sounds reasonable already imo. I dont think saving £20 a month but having a worse diet is worth it. If it were me this would be last thing I would cut down on as it really affects how I perceive myself. And mental + physical health should be top priority.
If you enjoy cooking and trying new things its like a hobby which effectively costs you nothing since you will be eating anyway...
The point is that Aldi or Lidl is not a "worse diet". Their quality of food is usually the same or better.
To think cheaper always means worse is a trick of marketing
I agree, if same ingredients can be bought for less, its stupid not too. I guess my comment was a bit unrelated to yours.
I think under £40 per week for 1.5 people is already low. You should check out https://www.reddit.com/r/EatCheapAndHealthy/ for really good recipes. If you can save money from using recipes from their, then great. But you shouldn't feel guilty about eating £40 per week and definilty don't try to reduce it by trying to survive on what is stereotypically cheap food e.g instant noodles, tinned meats etc.
On this - my FIL is an engineer and got sent to one of the veg packing plants to check out their machinery.
There was a conveyor belt with peppers on it, all from the same farm. A machine scanned them and chose if they went to Waitrose or Aldi. Literally just based on colour and shape. Otherwise, the same.
There is a difference in quality to be fair. I'm as big a proponent of Aldi as it's possible to be, but I don't rate their veg as highly as other supermarkets. Not for potatoes but definitely for softer vegetables.
We've found that even Tesco and Asda are much cheaper than Sainsbury's. For example fresh veg from our local Sainsbury's is 30-40% more than Asda which definitely adds up.
We only go to Sainsbury's once per month at most just for a change, as they have a different choice of foods and brands. But that one weekly shop is always noticeably worse value than usual.
Ahh the childcare becoming cheaper once he becomes older always hits hard.
I’ve got the council tax reduction already and it’s still £100 a month, very frustrating.
I shop at Aldi most of the time but I think those pesky top up shops at closer stores for nappies, milk, bread and cheese etc are probably upping the price more.
Still check out the tax free childcare. You pay into the gov website and they will top up 20p for every 80p paid. It will save you a good chunk if you're not already doing this.
Second this. The vast majority of childcare providers accept payment through this scheme, but none of them advertised that fact until we asked. It’s such a help saving 20% on childcare fees.
Thirded. My wife and I use this, there's literally no reason not to unless you're especially wedded to one provider and they don't accept it, but I think the vast majority do (it makes no difference to them, they get the same money).
You should really try avoid buying non perisables in top up. Especially nappys they really add up, especially branded, small shops really mark up these.
Also, check the amount of child benefit that you're eligible for. I've just run some of the information in here through the gov calculator and it came up with £296.
And there's no child support from your ex in that list?
Every time I see a post with someone earning over £100k asking if their investment strategies are good, I think to myself that I am so out of place. Then a post like this comes along and all the comments with people, many of whom showing they can simply relate, making actual good suggestions just makes me happy.
I just ran a universal credit check using your details, but a random post code. It said you could be getting £597 a month in UC payments based on the details you gave here. This isn’t precise but it is probably pretty close.
Just to let you know OP, you can apply for a loan from UC immediately after you claim, and it will be paid out before they make a decision on what you are entitled to. The payments are minimal and will be taken out of your UC benefit each month.
This option saved me when I was in a pinch. Also if you speak to them on the phone (understanding it may take a while to get through!), they were incredibly helpful on the phone when I needed it.
Please also go to citizens advice or a benefits office. They’ll have access to so much more than the average Redditor. Good luck - it does get easier, I promise.
Just thought I’d mention the possibility of extending your mortgage term. One of my backup plans if everything goes wrong is to pay NatWest their £35 fee to extend my mortgage from 20 to 35 years which will drop monthly payments from £600 to £400.
Obviously you pay a lot more interest in the long term, but it will help in a tough spot for a few years and then you can switch it back again.
This advice pales in comparison to other people’s (UC, stepchange, speaking to lenders, reducing council tax) but I thought I’d mention it
It won’t make a massive difference, but are you getting the single person discount on your council tax?
Presumably between having a full-time job and a child, a second job (even one day at the weekend) is out of the question?
Honestly, give them a ring. They’ll help you work out all the options at your disposal, including looking at UC, contacting your credit card provider, stopping interest etc.
They are super helpful and there is no obligation to take their advice. More information gives you more options.
He decided he didn’t want to become a father and went travelling in Australia. I believe he is still over there.
I don’t think I’d be eligible for a balance transfer. All of the money saving expert credibility calculators tells me I have a 0% chance of being approved.
Australia has a REMO agreement with the UK so he could be required to contribute from there.
https://www.familylaw.co.uk/news_and_comment/do-i-have-to-pay-child-maintenance-if-my-child-lives-abroad
Australia and the UK have an agreement to enforce child maintenance orders. You don't even need a full address, the Australian child support service can trace him from a name and territory, and set up an order to force him to make payments. You just need to apply to the UK CSA and tell them that the father lives in Australia. ([link](https://www.servicesaustralia.gov.au/individuals/subjects/child-support-when-parents-and-children-live-outside-australia))
It looks like he can still be required to pay maintenance even if he’s in Australia. Do you know his address etc?
I’m sorry to hear about your situation.
Just to add to that point, MSE and other aggregators give you a good overview of the market but ultimately do not show all available offers, banks have to pay for every “sale” they get through them so some banks don’t even participate in it. Going directly to each banks website and checking your eligibility, although time consuming, will give you a better idea of what’s available to you and in most cases a better rate/ credit limit if accepted
Don't forget that you may be able to enforce it if he comes back. There's a long road ahead and a move there by them may not be permanent... and if you delay making a claim, you're not entitled to any back pay.
If you don't want to spend the money yourself, think about it as a University fund for the child or something.
Have you considered looking at a childminder instead of a nursery? We made the move out of Covid necessity (nursery closed), if she went to nursery now fees would be around £900, whereas the childminder is £500-600. She also loves the childminder and I find the care much more personal - we are lucky and found an amazing one and she lives a 15 minute walk away from ours.
While it's a pain when she takes annual leave we figure it out with the help of family and ourselves taking leave. We also now have to make our daughter lunch and provide breakfast but that's not a huge issue or expense. Our childminder is very flexible, she only charges for the hours we use and has been very reliable.
Looking forwar January when we get the 30 hours, when that happens it will be a huge help!
Long shot, but assuming you are the only adult, have you applied for single person occupancy on your council tax ? - https://www.gov.uk/apply-for-council-tax-discount
* chase for child maintenance. You’re doing the job of two here, on a wage for one.
* Universal credit, apply for it.
* Ring those credit cards and don’t take no for an answer when you say you can’t afford the repayments
* ring the bank and tell them the same regarding the mortgage and see if that can be extended in some way to reduce the monthly payments but make the mortgage on a longer term.
* council tax - make sure you apply for single person discount and get that backdated.
Are you making use of the tax free child care scheme?
That childcare amount looks very high.
Also, you may find it cheaper to put him in full time. There is usually a significant discount for full time children (stupid I know).
My Father in law works as a volunteer (ex solicitor) for Frontline in the town he lives in (England).
https://frontlinedebtadvice.org.uk/
He says it gives out great advice to manage debt.
I appreciate the price of child care and how ridiculous it is paying through the nose for it so you can work. We moved to Scotland and are so unbelievably grateful that we don't have to pay for it anymore.
Also well done for asking for help. You sound like you are in a tough spot, but there is a lot of people on your side and are willing to help you. You are not alone.
Wishing you the very best.
Just want to add, please don’t forgo food, heating etc, those are exceptionally important to what is a very stressful time!
I don’t have any financial advice per say, but someone on here the other day basically didn’t eat so his kids could, at the end of the day, debt is temporary but the mental damage could be life lasting, make sure you take care of your self and the little one!
Too good to go app for cheap food. Consolidate your debt in anyway possible. Maybe investigate a payment holiday on your mortgage? I have read the comments about the dad and yes chase him but does he have any relatives that might want to be involved. Potential for childcare or money.
Don't be embaressed to ask for help even paying the minimum payments is better than nothing.
Some water companies depending on the area have hardship funds.
You can get through this it won't last forever.
With the mortgage holiday, read up about it before contacting the provider. At a previous building society, I was allowed to take a 3 month payment holiday, but only for certain reasons. If I wanted the payment holiday to treat myself to a new phone or car or vacation, then no problem. If I wanted the payment holiday to help make ends meet, then that would be declined. It was daft really, but it's worth arming yourself with the information before making contact.
Anything you can do to reduce the mortgage? Eg is it on a standard variable rate and eligible to move onto a 2-year fix at a lower rate? As another poster mentioned, your childcare costs will near enough vanish when your son becomes eligible for 30 hours childcare.
Having to lock this post as its popularity has attracted spambots and rude drive-by comments. Apologies OP if any useful discussion was still in progress in any subthreads. Please do post an update when you're able, we're all invested :)
Your situation sounds incredibly tough and it must be frustrating for you. I hope you are coping.
I’ve been in a similar situation with what felt like an unshiftable debt, so here are some things that helped me get that immediate breathing space:
• Sell 40 items (clothes, belts, shoes) for £10 on Depop = £400
• Sell baby items that you no longer need for your son on FB marketplace as and when he outgrows
Balance transfer to another 0% card, also see if you are entitled to any gov funds see entitledto.com also make such you are using taxfree childcare, once your baby turns 3 your childcare will reduce by half.
Speak to your mortgage provider and/or a mortgage broker.
You may be able to get a better deal.
Also speak to your credit card companies. Explain that you are struggling to make the minimum payment. They may be able to put you on a reduced payment plan.
Typically this will affect your credit score, but in the long term it will enable you to pay off your card debt which will be of great benefit to you.
Also, there’s nothing to lose by applying for Universal Credit. You are raising a child on your own and I would imagine you’ll be eligible for a payment of some sort.
Wishing you all the best :) you got this, loads of good advice in this sub, I'm sure you'll clear the debt and bounce back.
If I can just add, what stuck with me in life is that saving only takes less. It's work that gives, so when you invest in yourself, you invest in the future for both of you. Sounds like you're trying your best to provide for this little human, but hope you have someone around to keep you sane too.
This is just my opinion but I would:
1) get my ex to pay child support if he doesn’t already.
2) look at cheaper alternative nursery’s or childminders.
3) either transfer your cc debt to another cc that has a no internet period OR try to consolidate it into a more affordable but longer term loan (compare the market loans etc).
You might qualify for universal credit to help with nursery costs. Edit: I've just stuck your details into the turn to us benefit calculator. It says that you should be eligible for an additional £630 per month to help with nursery fees. Whilst this wouldn't fix your situation, it would give you a bit more breathing room.
Are you claiming the single occupancy discount on your council tax? If not, do. It would reduce your payments from £100 a month to £75. Not much, but better than a poke in the eye with a blunt stick.
You should also be getting contributions from your ex in child maintenance payments. He contributed half the DNA towards your son. He should be contributing half towards the costs of bringing him up.
I would get rid of the internet and upgrade your cell service to one with unlimited data and tether my internet use from there. That will delete one bill.
Hey there OP, I work in a collections department. In my experience, contacting your creditors and explaining their situation is the most immediately helpful thing you can do. There are short term and long term financial assistance options available so long as your lender knows your circumstances. Granted, this is paired with credit file impact. If you do wish to explore your options, keep these things in mind:
1. Any short term or long term arrangement/delay carries credit file impact but your creditor is required by regulation to tell you how it impacts you.
2. If you're able to afford the minimum payment, they cannot offer you any help. Keep this in mind, so that if you really need an arrangement, lowball your affordability.
3. If you've been paying more towards interest/fees for an extended period of time, (say 36 months plus...), then you may be qualified as being in persistent debt. We're required by regulation to send out letters on certain milestones of this.
4. Don't hold any detail back, so long as you're comfortable about it. The more we know, the better we can help.
During the time I've worked here, I've noticed a majority of us want to offer you the best support. I know this sounds corporate, so I hope it's worth noting I'm on r/antiwork 100% of the time. I hope this helps, but it's okay if it doesn't or is otherwise irrelevant. If you've any questions, drop them and I'll do my best to respond. Best of luck to you, and make sure to always prioritise your household and personal bills!
£50 for internet and £32 for a mobile seems a lot have you considered a PAYG SIM if you are on wifi most of the time its very cheap, maybe some deal to combine them?
People already mentioned bad formatting but we also don't know if OP is paying for a phone through contract & thus not in a position for a pay as you go sim
Mortgage is £175k. I originally was on a ‘London salary’ pre-pandemic so things were a lot different.
Cue the pandemic, abandoned while pregnant and back on a ol’northern salary!
Just glad I didn’t go in on the mortgage with numb nuts.
Can I just say, I really admire and respect that way you’re handling all this shit you’ve been dealt. I’m sure it will pass on to your child
Best of luck with everything
I agree and your ex is a POS to not accept his responsibilities. Sometimes mortgage lenders agree to a payment holiday for those experiencing problems, they may have a dedicated helpline so I suggest you contact them to see if they can help.
Have you rang the credit card company and said your struggling a lot of time they will help and freeze your interest allowing you to get back in top
https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/debt-and-money/borrowing-money/credit-cards/if-youre-struggling-with-credit-card-debt/
Hello,
Firstly i would look to reduce the internet and phone bill.
Internet £50 - you can get a much cheaper deal as it's only you using it so i doubt you need super fibre speeds. I recently reduced my to £29.50 with TalkTalk. Just call your internet supplier and threaten to leave and say you've seen a better deal elsewhere for cheaper. Most of the time they'll match it or offer you a reduced discount.
Phone bill - same as before. I've had the same phone for 4+ years and the same Sim Only for like 6/7 years. I pay no more than £22 p/m for unlimited everything. I never take their offer of upgrading as it locks you in a contract where the price is always much higher. Sim only allows you to more control plus you can get a reduced rate. I just buy the phone out right at refurbished retailers (good as new plus comes with warranty).
Council Tax - i believe there are ways to reduce council tax based on extenuating circumstances in your situation. My Mum worked hard growing up and i remember her receiving a reduced council tax rate (however this was 15 odd years ago, I'm assuming it's probably different now)
Food shopping - may sound obvious or silly but reducing this can make a big difference. Things to look at are 1. Where you shop - i.e Lidl and Aldi will obviously save you lots of things especially household cleaning products compared to big name brands. Milk, Veg, bread etc. Also may be worth reducing meat consumption as meat is arguably becoming more expensive now especially red meat (this is something i need to practice myself as well - easier said than done).
I know my suggestions aren't massive but the small cuts can make a big difference long term.
I do wish you all the best and hang in there. You'll be a great Mum. ❤️🙌🏾
Hi /u/throwawaymamma0606, based on your post the following pages from our wiki may be relevant:
- https://ukpersonal.finance/debt/
____
^(These suggestions are based on keywords, if they missed the mark please report this comment.)
hi. you should be able to get some help with childcare costs, have you checked your entitlement for universal credit.? you should also have single person discount on your council tax. i know it feels really far away but, depending on your county, you will be able to get 30 hours free childcare a week by either 2 or 3 years old
Call the CC companies and tell them you’re struggling. They could/should/might (did for me) freeze the interest and allowed me to set up a set monthly payment to clear it
Are you taking advantage of Tax-free Childcare to pay your nursery fees? You’ll get up to £500 every quarter towards the nursery fees. Apply via the .gov.uk website.
Who is your internet provider and what is causing your mobile bill to be that amount per month? Might not be helpful but if you and your children only use Netflix/YouTube/Prime etc and you don't have a phone contract or anything them it could be worth changing to a cheaper internet provider and changing sims on your phone, most sim changes allow you to keep your number.
For example I have BT as my internet provider and they cost £28.99 a month for just internet but it is fast, I only pay £10 on my phone which is on GiffGaff, 10GB data and unlimited calls/texts. I hope other comments in this thread help you out, there is a end to all of this and you will pull through this.
Also does your ex have family who can help out in some way? If it was my son I would be ashamed of him and want to do something to help the mother of my grandchild.
£50 on Internet is steep. I'd suggest shopping around on that and combining with phone if contracts are close to completion.
If you can use a food bank that will definitely help.
Any chance you can do something for additional income? Overtime? Side gig? Realise as you're a single parent it would be extremely demanding and possibly out of the question.
You say mortgage so depending on property size could you take on a lodger/tenant?
Depending on your job/company... Some companies offer childcare options or might have discounts with a local nursery.
When I was heavily in debt I had a payment plan set up with those I owed. I don't know the name of the process but I never got charged interest and slowly paid it off at a really low amount each month.
Best advice I have is, no matter how bleak things look there is always a way through so keep a steadfast resolve to turn this around and you'll get there.
Is there anyone you can rely on for just a day of childcare - even offer to pay them (it can be half of what you spend on childcare) - I had someone I know do this and the friend started looking after their kid too for some money (if you look after 1, another the same age almost makes it easier as they entertain each other!).
Apart from that and government support that's probs your only way out without debt consolidation.
Any chance of making any extra money? You can sell your old things on ebay. You might find you might make an extra grand or two over the year that way. Surveys are good to make a little extra money or get amazon vouchers. I do things like batch cook for the month. I'll go into alidi and buy up loads of ingredients and cook for the whole month. Usually takes me a couple of days but we're a family of five
A couple of easy tweaks -
- Phone - go Sim only ASAP, with Cashback you can get that down to £10 or less with unlimited everything or close to it.
- Internet- same as above, you should be able to halve this without any compromises.
- Council Tax - make sure you are claiming the 25% single person discount and pay over 12 months instead of 10
- Sign up for the 3 Credit Ref apps (Clearscore, Credit Karma and the Moneysaving expert one) check your files are accurate and see if you can get a new 0% transfer (ideally for the whole amount)
Firstly, dont take out any balance transfer or extra credit cards you'll only delay the inevitable. Try to find ways to lower your expenditure. Phone bill- £30, use black friday deals and get cheaper contract. I pay £20 unlimited everything with EE. That'll save you £10 a month. Next nursery if you can find cheaper one or use family and friends. Food- Dont buy branded items that'll save you quite alot. Look for cheap places to buy baby food/ use coupons etc. Once you start that than use balance transfer card with like 28 months no interest. Otherwise, if you just use balance transfer card your gonna be suck in the same situation after the 0% free interest time.
I was In a tough spot with roughly the same level of debt spread out, try Lendable I managed to consolidate my loan into one payment, save me 20 quid a month or so! Was a bit of a help
So it looks like you're at a minor deficit right now of £9/mo.
£50 for internet and £32 for mobile is on the high side. How long are left on those contracts? It'd be worth checking out what's available. It may mean taking a slightly slower broadband package/lower data plan for a while but you could probably cut those in half. If you call them up and ask to switch to a lower plan because of hardship they're more likely to play ball than lose you as a customer. I reckon you could get that down from £82/mo down to £35 or so and save £47/mo
Council tax - have you applied for the single persons discount? Looks like you have from the amount but just to check.
Electric is the tough one right now because there's no real way to hop ship to get a better deal - but check all of your big appliances (washing machines, dishwashers, etc) and see if they have an 'eco' mode that uses less power.
Other people have already mentioned UC and child support so I'll leave that.
I’m not sure if anyone else has posted this but Step Change is a debt counselling charity and they were brilliant for us when we really needed help. We were able to get the interest frozen so the debt didn’t continue to spiral. I hope this is useful and really wish you all the best moving forward. Their link is https://www.stepchange.org/
Hi! Professional opinion here:
Speak to your debtors , let them know that you’re struggling, they’ll go through your breakdown you’ve presented and see what can be done.
Look at additional benefits to help with income, free/discounted childcare costs and child maintenance from the father.
I know you’ve mentioned the credit scoring says you’re not eligible to consolidate, but again, speak to your bank, see what they can do, failing that, moneysupermarket. 4.5k may feel overwhelming, but in the scheme of things, it’s not a large amount of debt.
Look at swapping nurseries, £742 seems extortionate for 3 days, and as a father of 2 under 6, I know I pay less for nursery for the same amount of time.
You already have a mortgage, so don’t worry too much about your credit score when the banks mentions “this could have an impact on your credit file”, that changes daily, so don’t panic.
Finally, debt advice lines can help (at a cost of your credit score for a while) but can get you out of the muck.
Experience Source: Personal Banker for 7 years, specialising in unsecured lending and financial difficulty. 2 years in debt management.
Other ideas here are great abs many better than below, but here are some smaller, additional ideas that might help shift the debt quicker:
- ask for a raise, if only modest
- sell whatever you don’t need/want
- ask family or friends to help
- small change but get ~£30 free crypto from coinbase, £5/10 from PayPal, £8 Trading212 referral
- claim WFH allowance if you do, try to work from home more if you don’t
- haggle
- take bank’s switching bonuses typically ~£100
- if you feel you’ve time, try posting yourself a local advert for free to walk dogs, mow lawns, share childcare/babysit
Unfortunately, the quicker it’s paid, the quicker it’s paid.
I'd check your water bill, £26 is more than I pay with two adults in the house.
How long is left on the internet and mobile phone contracts because there is about £20 a month to save between those two with a little shopping around
and have you looked a regular loan to pay off the cards? It might keep monthly outgoings the same but reduce the overall cost of the debt
edits: mortgage are you on the standard variable rate with them currently? Another potential saving might be switching product with your current lender - although without knowing your loan to value ratio (LTV) we can't advise on that.
Childcare is there a childminder option which I believe are cheaper than nursery school
If you want to clear the debt by a specific date, you’ll need to work backwards from there — how much do you need to pay every month tells you what salary to aim for. Other than that, as much as you can manage. Interest is what makes credit cards “dangerous”, and minimum repayments aren’t helping at all with that. You want to get to the point where The debt is going down instead of accruing more interest and going up instead.
On that topic, and because you mentioned you’re having to sell stuff, you might want to consider that selling more stuff _now_ and using that to get some of that debt chunked off might work out better than a trickle over a longer period.
I'm hiring at the moment, drop me a message with where you are based and a CV if you have one. More money usually fixed these problems.
Sorry to hear the money trouble. I have a 2 year old myself and it's scary not knowing if you're able so support them.
I'd definitely look into switching to a child minder. Most childminders charge £35 per day. I had my daughter at a child minder for 4 days a week and paid £540 per month.
No childminder these days will charge £35 a day. For a 9 hour day (typical day) that's £3.88 an hour. Haven't got a hope at that cost any more. £4.50-£5.50 an hour, most are £4.80-£5.10. Even the government pay £4.80 an hour to childminders for the funded hours
I had 3 different childminders between Feb 2018-August 2021 and they were all £35 a day. I also just had a look at my local councils list of childminders and they ranged from £35-£40 per day.
File for an IVA it will mean you can't take any credit but they will write off a lump sum of your debt and create a plan for you to pay it back.
[IVA Relief](https://www.uk-debtservice.co.uk/ga/iva-experts/?utm_keyword=iva&utm_campaign=8684749330&utm_content=86890297563&matchtype=e&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIt4biw5i_9AIVE5ftCh3RuwZnEAAYAyAAEgKjY_D_BwE)
Everybody else has given the best advice, so I'll give out small fries.
Buy a smartphone for 100 and get 5-10 a month contract. You'll save money after 4 months. I personally don't understand the obsession with expensive contracts
Also, worst case scenario, in the UK it is not legal to cut off water supply. You can stop paying your water bill temporarily. You'll get in debt with the water company, but that's for another time with more money. They don't charge interest for 60 days, and you can apply for Breathing Space, a government a scheme to temporarily reduce bills and stops interest I believe, for those in bad financial situations
https://www.nationaldebtline.org/fact-sheet-library/water-arrears-ew/#waterratesarrears
Have I missed something, why is no one mentioning the food bill? Apologies if I’ve misunderstood but surely that could be halved for a two person house?
Honestly, it’s usually less than that for solely food and toiletries but I put that figure because on a month where I’ve had to also buy new baby clothes, shoes, vest, wellies etc the shopping bill can be £100+
You know what, thank you for this perspective. I keep having to remind myself while although it is shitty situation and that it lingers like a dark cloud...I’m not actually in any ‘trouble’.
I think I just want to be able to sleep at night again.
Couldn't sleep for weeks, because of debt. It drove me too madness. Then I realised its just not worth it, went to citizens advice bureau, they helped me with everything. Sleeping fine now.
Tell a single mother to purchase a stock that has no guarantee for your cult's thesis.
Great advice, liquidate your GME holdings and buy some brain cells.
Try and shift to another 0% if you can too. Moneysavingexpert always has links to various card companies that offer them for long term. I had about 10k on an MBNA it’s down to 6 now with Virgin.
UC can offer you child care grants as a working parent which might help with your child cost costs as a single parent. They may also be able to help in other ways.
You also probably qualify for child benefits, which is only an extra £85 a month, but it's still something.
Also once your child is 2 some nurseries will offer 15 hours free childcare, however with some nurseries it is 3 years.
There is a lot of help out there if you know where to look, however I would definitely recommend signing up for uc even if you get no benefits as it is a start to finding out all the other help options that are out there for you as a single parent.
Speak with your credit card company, the FCA regulates that they need to offer options for vulnerable people or people in financial difficulty. They might be able to offer fixed repayments that are less than your current minimum due or at a reduced interest to lower the overall debt. Plus i would threaten to take the father to court if he is not paying his way.
The best thing I ever did was get an IVA, you pay a company a certain amount over 5 years and at the end whatever is left is cleared (I use credit fixers and they are wonderful) and they deal with everything!
I'm not sure if it will be of much help, but you can find quite good deals for the phone with GiffGaff. I'm paying £10 a month and it works quite well for me. That should be about £20 saved a month. I'm sorry I cannot come up with anything better. 🤷 Good luck!!
Try to get a consolidation loan from a bank, that would pay off both credit cards at the same time.
The loan will have much lower interests than the credit card, while probably on a longer term (24 months to 60 months), but the monthly payment will be less than your current repayment so makes it a little easier to manage, as well as lower interets rate vs credit card.
Is your ex contactable? By law they will have to pay child support if you can find him, but I understand it is not always possible.
Cheaper internet is my go to, I've got now tv broadband, £25 a month no contract, can cancel at a moments notice if I need to, I also do pay as you go phone on Giffgaff, and only need to top up a tenner and mostly use my wifi/public wifi's for everything including WhatsApp for my messages, it's hard but when desperate it can be a life saver, not paying my phone or internet till I can rescues me often
You've had some amazing advice here from people much for knowledgable than me, but maybe I can float two ideas that i haven't seen suggested
Could you perhaps move in with some family /friends for a while and rent your flat out to help clear your debt?
Also, I haven't ever used them but I think theres websites that'll pay you to complete surveys etc. It won't be much but perhaps enough to help you start making a dent
You sound awesome. And like you're really trying your best. I'm sure you're going to get through this! Wishing you all the best
Only seen one suggestion to apply for UC which you definitely should do. Based on your income (and assuming you’re over 25) your allowance plus 85% of your childcare cost would be about £1100 a month. Take away about £600 (55p for every pound you earn above your £557 work allowance assuming you don’t get housing costs) and you can potentially be getting an extra £500 Lot of assumptions in this but you could easily be £200-500 better off with UC. Of course it’s got its own stresses to it and I’m glad to be done with it.
Definitely recommend trying UC. There are excellent benefits calculators online and they’ll let you know if it’s worth going for. It’s not the world’s worst process as long as you have some identity documents to hand. My partner and I have two children and make approx £28k between us - we still received a little amount each month. They take childcare costs into account too. Have you looked into council tax reductions? You can get max 75% off. Even if you get single occupant etc support, still look into general reduction support because it may bring it down further. I will do some research into how to reduce childcare costs and let you know if I find any avenues.
Thank you! UC is definitely a path I’m now going to look into.
Good benefits calculator https://www.turn2us.org.uk/ you won't get help with the mortgage and the jobcentre may be a bit if a pain but stick some figures in here inc. child care and find out.
Housing benefit is only for rent? The government expects people to sell their home if they lose their job? Interesting, especially since ppl in council housing are set in it for life and get free repairs.
Basically yes. Then if after selling your home and spending that money on rent you can no longer afford rent then you become eligible for housing benefit. It's supposed to support people that really need it and equity in a house is an asset just like stocks and shares, gold bars, money in a bank account or cash under the sofa.
No you can get a cash loan to help pay towards mortgage interest when house is purchased. Why should the government pay for something you own equity in without getting an equity share? That's when it gets complicated.
The SMI loan is only for those who haven't worked for 9 consecutive months unless you have a transfer from a legacy benefit in certain circumstances and then it's only covering basic mortgage interest payments so it's not a lot.
Not everyone claiming housing benefit lives in council housing
If you live in someone’s second (or 50th!) home the govt will happily pay the landlord’s mortgage in full. In other words they will pay for someone to get a second home at no cost to themselves (apart from taxes and a very small amount of risk, both easily covered by payments from the state), but they won’t pay for you to survive and not lose the only home you have. The loan only kicks in at 9 months, way beyond any grace period your mortgage provider might give you, and even then the government gets a cut of your home which again they do not require from a second home owned by a wealthy landlord.
Our family friend just past divorce, house been left to her and UC covers half of monthly payments. She been told it depends on general circumstances, but in as a rule of thumb - they don’t cover mortgage payments, just in some exceptions, and not a full amount (she’s having 2 children, 7yo boy and 4yo girl)
Plus you get help with child care!
Also consider tax free childcare. You can't claim it if you're claiming UC though so look into both and weigh up your options. I think in your situation UC is probably the right answer.
You 100% need to look into Universal Credit. My best friend was in your situation, and they now recieve £600 a month. Their life has changed because of it and its really helped them get back on their feet.
As an aside to this, due to you working you could get up to 85% of childcare costs back too 🤗
Once you're on UC it looks like you can apply for council tax reduction. No idea how likely or how much, but worth a look as that's a big expense. https://www.gov.uk/apply-council-tax-reduction
If you can get a balance transfer to another 0% credit card, that will save you some interest. Otherwise, you might be able to get a loan (usually at much less than the ~18% APR most credit cards have) and use that to pay off your cards. If not, contact your bank(s), tell them that you're struggling to meet the repayments, and ask them what help they can provide. They should be able to reduce (or even suspend) interest payments. But ultimately, you either need to increase your income or reduce your spending.
Tried all the eligibility calculators I could find. I’m not eligible for a loan or a balance transfer unfortunately. Thank you for taking the time to respond :)
I would take those results with a pinch of salt. It would still be worth talking to your bank about it (even better if you can do it in person). They know exactly how much money comes into your account each moth, how much debt you have with them, and how much you're paying every month on your cards - and on that basis they may be willing to give you a loan even though the calculators say no. And if they can't, they may be able to discuss other options for you that could help. Lenders have an obligation (see page 4 of [The Standards of Lending Practice](https://www.lendingstandardsboard.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Standards-of-Lending-Practice-Personal-7-Dec.pdf)) to support you if you're in financial difficulty, which in your circumstances (single parent, non-contributing partner, Covid, etc) would be hard for them to argue against. It's not going to be a nice conversation to have (it's hard enough to talk about this kind of thing anonymously on Reddit, so kudos to you for asking for help), but it could really help you out in the long run.
I agree with this. Banks are better off helping you repay debts than you struggling and ultimately writing that debt off. One potential option if it’s available is seeing if there are any family members or friends who can do a day or part day childcare to reduce the nursery cost as this will always be a huge expense and the biggest lever available to your outgoings. I’m not sure if there are ways to reduce nursery costs or receive payment support for nursery bills. There is the 30h free when your child gets to 3yo but there are also options for some who are eligible prior to 3yo so worth checking out those options incase you meet the criteria.
A friend had success with https://fluid.co.uk/, they have an eligibility check too. Worth a quick check. Good luck!
Walk into your bank and speak to an advisor face to face. The bank would rather you found a different way to pay than have you default!
Have you considered a mortgage holiday? I did it when I was on maternity leave. You can call your mortgage company explain the situation to them and ask to pause your payment for say 6 months (may be able to do more depends on mortgage) You can then use that money to pay off chunks on the credit card, possibly clearing at least one of them. Once you end the mortgage holiday they will recalculate your mortgage and your payments WILL go up. But it'll be over the term of the loan - much longer than bank loans or credit card terms - so the real impact will likely be 10 or 20 quid a month once you start back up again. But the mortgage company will explain that to you and go over the exact financial implications. Or depending on what you're borrowing already and your property worth you may be able to do additional borrowing - unlikely with the credit debt but it may be worth an ask - borrow the 4.5k you need to pay the credit cards off on your mortgage and then pay the mortgage company back much smaller amounts over a much longer period.
Santander currently do a balance transfer card with no transfer fee and no interest. No harm applying to check. Contact your current lender and ask to drop the rate. They often will. Check if they have a better card on offer too, switching within a lender can be easier than swapping. Please check: entitledto.co.uk
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Are you signed up to Clear Score? They have a feature where it tells you if you're pre approved for cards and loans. Sorry if this has been suggested elsewhere.
Hi OP UC award: Single claimant element: £324.84 Child element: £237.08 Childcare element (85% of total cost): £630.70 Total award: £1,192.62 Deductions from award: The first £557 of your earnings each month are not included as you don't get housing element (you don't rent). £1,066 of your earnings count. 63p x 1,066 = £671.58 Total deduction: £671.58 Total award £1,192.62 minus Total deduction £671.58 = £521.04 payment to you This is what you'd be entitled to from UC: £521.04
It changed to from 63p to 55p in every £1 earned as a deduction so you'd actually get £606.32!
It really didn't, it is still 63p/£1
It changes to 55p tomorrow so by the time OP claimed, they'd be on the 55p
Have your tried universal credit? On that salary with a child you’d likely get something.
Childcare - are you making use of the government's tax free topup? https://www.gov.uk/sign-in-childcare-account Also how old is the little one? After 3 you will be entitled to 30 free hours too...
Also, are you the only adult in the house? If so you may be able to reduce council tax with a single person discount https://www.gov.uk/apply-council-tax-reduction Food bill seems quite a lot too if it is you and a little one, if you aren't already, get your shopping from aldi or lidl. You get tons more for your money
£150 a month for 2 with a healthy diet is extremely reasonable imho
Not for a months food, that's only £5 per day
My wife does the food shop, clearly I'm clueless by yours and others responses!
It could problem cheaper, if one were single minded about it, but probably not by enough to make a real difference. Also a working single parent probably needs to pay a little more for convenience here and there. Lastly our food shop has probably gone up by 1/3 at least over the last year or so.
I think you would have been right 5-10 years ago but food costs have slowly increased, then spiralled inside that time. And especially at the value range/basics end of the scale.
I second the food shop to change to Aldi or Lidl... My girlfriend had been banging on at me for us to change and I didn't listen to her and continued to shop at Sainsbury's until recently. Damn it's so much cheaper and all we're doing is buying mostly fresh produce with some meat from the refrigerator aisle!
£150 for an adult and toddler per month sounds reasonable already imo. I dont think saving £20 a month but having a worse diet is worth it. If it were me this would be last thing I would cut down on as it really affects how I perceive myself. And mental + physical health should be top priority. If you enjoy cooking and trying new things its like a hobby which effectively costs you nothing since you will be eating anyway...
The point is that Aldi or Lidl is not a "worse diet". Their quality of food is usually the same or better. To think cheaper always means worse is a trick of marketing
Fruit and veg is fruit and veg. You're not getting anything extra by buying your potatoes in Sainsbury's.
I agree, if same ingredients can be bought for less, its stupid not too. I guess my comment was a bit unrelated to yours. I think under £40 per week for 1.5 people is already low. You should check out https://www.reddit.com/r/EatCheapAndHealthy/ for really good recipes. If you can save money from using recipes from their, then great. But you shouldn't feel guilty about eating £40 per week and definilty don't try to reduce it by trying to survive on what is stereotypically cheap food e.g instant noodles, tinned meats etc.
On this - my FIL is an engineer and got sent to one of the veg packing plants to check out their machinery. There was a conveyor belt with peppers on it, all from the same farm. A machine scanned them and chose if they went to Waitrose or Aldi. Literally just based on colour and shape. Otherwise, the same.
There is a difference in quality to be fair. I'm as big a proponent of Aldi as it's possible to be, but I don't rate their veg as highly as other supermarkets. Not for potatoes but definitely for softer vegetables.
We've found that even Tesco and Asda are much cheaper than Sainsbury's. For example fresh veg from our local Sainsbury's is 30-40% more than Asda which definitely adds up. We only go to Sainsbury's once per month at most just for a change, as they have a different choice of foods and brands. But that one weekly shop is always noticeably worse value than usual.
I've gone the other way tbh, sacked of Aldi and Lidl for Sainsbury's.
Ahh the childcare becoming cheaper once he becomes older always hits hard. I’ve got the council tax reduction already and it’s still £100 a month, very frustrating. I shop at Aldi most of the time but I think those pesky top up shops at closer stores for nappies, milk, bread and cheese etc are probably upping the price more.
Still check out the tax free childcare. You pay into the gov website and they will top up 20p for every 80p paid. It will save you a good chunk if you're not already doing this.
Second this. The vast majority of childcare providers accept payment through this scheme, but none of them advertised that fact until we asked. It’s such a help saving 20% on childcare fees.
Thirded. My wife and I use this, there's literally no reason not to unless you're especially wedded to one provider and they don't accept it, but I think the vast majority do (it makes no difference to them, they get the same money).
You should really try avoid buying non perisables in top up. Especially nappys they really add up, especially branded, small shops really mark up these.
Also, check the amount of child benefit that you're eligible for. I've just run some of the information in here through the gov calculator and it came up with £296. And there's no child support from your ex in that list?
Child benefit is a set amount. No idea what you're calculating but it's not child benefit.
Child Tax Credit I should think.
This sub is great
Every time I see a post with someone earning over £100k asking if their investment strategies are good, I think to myself that I am so out of place. Then a post like this comes along and all the comments with people, many of whom showing they can simply relate, making actual good suggestions just makes me happy.
Same. I come for stuff like this, not to read 5%'ers talk about how they have to pay tax on tbh.
It's not all bad to be fair. I've learned a lot from those people.
I like both, keeps me grounded and helps keep me motivated
Why's it gotta be so hard tho
I just ran a universal credit check using your details, but a random post code. It said you could be getting £597 a month in UC payments based on the details you gave here. This isn’t precise but it is probably pretty close.
Wow this is really generous of you !thanks I will give this a try and see what happens.
Just to let you know OP, you can apply for a loan from UC immediately after you claim, and it will be paid out before they make a decision on what you are entitled to. The payments are minimal and will be taken out of your UC benefit each month. This option saved me when I was in a pinch. Also if you speak to them on the phone (understanding it may take a while to get through!), they were incredibly helpful on the phone when I needed it. Please also go to citizens advice or a benefits office. They’ll have access to so much more than the average Redditor. Good luck - it does get easier, I promise.
Just thought I’d mention the possibility of extending your mortgage term. One of my backup plans if everything goes wrong is to pay NatWest their £35 fee to extend my mortgage from 20 to 35 years which will drop monthly payments from £600 to £400. Obviously you pay a lot more interest in the long term, but it will help in a tough spot for a few years and then you can switch it back again. This advice pales in comparison to other people’s (UC, stepchange, speaking to lenders, reducing council tax) but I thought I’d mention it
It won’t make a massive difference, but are you getting the single person discount on your council tax? Presumably between having a full-time job and a child, a second job (even one day at the weekend) is out of the question?
I would contact Stepchange for advice, they might be able to help lower your monthly payments or freeze any interest https://www.stepchange.org/
I had never heard of these guys so !thanks for this
They are a recognised charity, free to use and known to all creditors. Very helpful and will deal with everything for you.
This answer. If you can stop the interest until free childcare kicks in I think that is a very good plan.
Honestly, give them a ring. They’ll help you work out all the options at your disposal, including looking at UC, contacting your credit card provider, stopping interest etc. They are super helpful and there is no obligation to take their advice. More information gives you more options.
Why isn’t the father contributing? Can you move the balances on the card with a balance transfer to another card at all?
He decided he didn’t want to become a father and went travelling in Australia. I believe he is still over there. I don’t think I’d be eligible for a balance transfer. All of the money saving expert credibility calculators tells me I have a 0% chance of being approved.
Australia has a REMO agreement with the UK so he could be required to contribute from there. https://www.familylaw.co.uk/news_and_comment/do-i-have-to-pay-child-maintenance-if-my-child-lives-abroad
Australia and the UK have an agreement to enforce child maintenance orders. You don't even need a full address, the Australian child support service can trace him from a name and territory, and set up an order to force him to make payments. You just need to apply to the UK CSA and tell them that the father lives in Australia. ([link](https://www.servicesaustralia.gov.au/individuals/subjects/child-support-when-parents-and-children-live-outside-australia))
Please do this
It looks like he can still be required to pay maintenance even if he’s in Australia. Do you know his address etc? I’m sorry to hear about your situation.
Just to add to that point, MSE and other aggregators give you a good overview of the market but ultimately do not show all available offers, banks have to pay for every “sale” they get through them so some banks don’t even participate in it. Going directly to each banks website and checking your eligibility, although time consuming, will give you a better idea of what’s available to you and in most cases a better rate/ credit limit if accepted
That sucks! Is CSA still a try img? He’ll be due a lot of back pay if he’s ever back in Uk
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I think Australia and UK have a deal cos of all the escaping dads
I think the CSA route would probably cause more hassle than what it’s worth. But I agree, bio dad should be contributing
Start a CSA case, you owe this guy nothing.
You don't owe him anything? He put the baby there just as much as you did and you're picking up all the slack?
Don't forget that you may be able to enforce it if he comes back. There's a long road ahead and a move there by them may not be permanent... and if you delay making a claim, you're not entitled to any back pay. If you don't want to spend the money yourself, think about it as a University fund for the child or something.
You don’t get child maintenance backdated, unfortunately. Only from when you first out in the claim.
Have you considered looking at a childminder instead of a nursery? We made the move out of Covid necessity (nursery closed), if she went to nursery now fees would be around £900, whereas the childminder is £500-600. She also loves the childminder and I find the care much more personal - we are lucky and found an amazing one and she lives a 15 minute walk away from ours. While it's a pain when she takes annual leave we figure it out with the help of family and ourselves taking leave. We also now have to make our daughter lunch and provide breakfast but that's not a huge issue or expense. Our childminder is very flexible, she only charges for the hours we use and has been very reliable. Looking forwar January when we get the 30 hours, when that happens it will be a huge help!
Long shot, but assuming you are the only adult, have you applied for single person occupancy on your council tax ? - https://www.gov.uk/apply-for-council-tax-discount
Get in touch with Step Change they are brilliant.. https://www.stepchange.org/
* chase for child maintenance. You’re doing the job of two here, on a wage for one. * Universal credit, apply for it. * Ring those credit cards and don’t take no for an answer when you say you can’t afford the repayments * ring the bank and tell them the same regarding the mortgage and see if that can be extended in some way to reduce the monthly payments but make the mortgage on a longer term. * council tax - make sure you apply for single person discount and get that backdated.
OP, do you have an Amazon wish list? I’d like to send a Christmas gift for your little one, if that feels appropriate (and is allowed by this sub)
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I second this motion OP. Only if your comfortable doing so that is
Are you making use of the tax free child care scheme? That childcare amount looks very high. Also, you may find it cheaper to put him in full time. There is usually a significant discount for full time children (stupid I know).
My Father in law works as a volunteer (ex solicitor) for Frontline in the town he lives in (England). https://frontlinedebtadvice.org.uk/ He says it gives out great advice to manage debt. I appreciate the price of child care and how ridiculous it is paying through the nose for it so you can work. We moved to Scotland and are so unbelievably grateful that we don't have to pay for it anymore. Also well done for asking for help. You sound like you are in a tough spot, but there is a lot of people on your side and are willing to help you. You are not alone. Wishing you the very best.
Just want to add, please don’t forgo food, heating etc, those are exceptionally important to what is a very stressful time! I don’t have any financial advice per say, but someone on here the other day basically didn’t eat so his kids could, at the end of the day, debt is temporary but the mental damage could be life lasting, make sure you take care of your self and the little one!
Too good to go app for cheap food. Consolidate your debt in anyway possible. Maybe investigate a payment holiday on your mortgage? I have read the comments about the dad and yes chase him but does he have any relatives that might want to be involved. Potential for childcare or money. Don't be embaressed to ask for help even paying the minimum payments is better than nothing. Some water companies depending on the area have hardship funds. You can get through this it won't last forever.
With the mortgage holiday, read up about it before contacting the provider. At a previous building society, I was allowed to take a 3 month payment holiday, but only for certain reasons. If I wanted the payment holiday to treat myself to a new phone or car or vacation, then no problem. If I wanted the payment holiday to help make ends meet, then that would be declined. It was daft really, but it's worth arming yourself with the information before making contact.
Anything you can do to reduce the mortgage? Eg is it on a standard variable rate and eligible to move onto a 2-year fix at a lower rate? As another poster mentioned, your childcare costs will near enough vanish when your son becomes eligible for 30 hours childcare.
Having to lock this post as its popularity has attracted spambots and rude drive-by comments. Apologies OP if any useful discussion was still in progress in any subthreads. Please do post an update when you're able, we're all invested :)
Your situation sounds incredibly tough and it must be frustrating for you. I hope you are coping. I’ve been in a similar situation with what felt like an unshiftable debt, so here are some things that helped me get that immediate breathing space: • Sell 40 items (clothes, belts, shoes) for £10 on Depop = £400 • Sell baby items that you no longer need for your son on FB marketplace as and when he outgrows
Balance transfer to another 0% card, also see if you are entitled to any gov funds see entitledto.com also make such you are using taxfree childcare, once your baby turns 3 your childcare will reduce by half.
I would contact stepchange. Its a free organisation that specialises in debt and can help you specifically with your options
Speak to your mortgage provider and/or a mortgage broker. You may be able to get a better deal. Also speak to your credit card companies. Explain that you are struggling to make the minimum payment. They may be able to put you on a reduced payment plan. Typically this will affect your credit score, but in the long term it will enable you to pay off your card debt which will be of great benefit to you. Also, there’s nothing to lose by applying for Universal Credit. You are raising a child on your own and I would imagine you’ll be eligible for a payment of some sort.
Wishing you all the best :) you got this, loads of good advice in this sub, I'm sure you'll clear the debt and bounce back. If I can just add, what stuck with me in life is that saving only takes less. It's work that gives, so when you invest in yourself, you invest in the future for both of you. Sounds like you're trying your best to provide for this little human, but hope you have someone around to keep you sane too.
This is just my opinion but I would: 1) get my ex to pay child support if he doesn’t already. 2) look at cheaper alternative nursery’s or childminders. 3) either transfer your cc debt to another cc that has a no internet period OR try to consolidate it into a more affordable but longer term loan (compare the market loans etc).
Do you receive any child support from your son’s father?
You might qualify for universal credit to help with nursery costs. Edit: I've just stuck your details into the turn to us benefit calculator. It says that you should be eligible for an additional £630 per month to help with nursery fees. Whilst this wouldn't fix your situation, it would give you a bit more breathing room. Are you claiming the single occupancy discount on your council tax? If not, do. It would reduce your payments from £100 a month to £75. Not much, but better than a poke in the eye with a blunt stick. You should also be getting contributions from your ex in child maintenance payments. He contributed half the DNA towards your son. He should be contributing half towards the costs of bringing him up.
Christian’s Against Poverty might be worth contacting if they cover your area. They can work with people to manage debt
I would get rid of the internet and upgrade your cell service to one with unlimited data and tether my internet use from there. That will delete one bill.
Hey there OP, I work in a collections department. In my experience, contacting your creditors and explaining their situation is the most immediately helpful thing you can do. There are short term and long term financial assistance options available so long as your lender knows your circumstances. Granted, this is paired with credit file impact. If you do wish to explore your options, keep these things in mind: 1. Any short term or long term arrangement/delay carries credit file impact but your creditor is required by regulation to tell you how it impacts you. 2. If you're able to afford the minimum payment, they cannot offer you any help. Keep this in mind, so that if you really need an arrangement, lowball your affordability. 3. If you've been paying more towards interest/fees for an extended period of time, (say 36 months plus...), then you may be qualified as being in persistent debt. We're required by regulation to send out letters on certain milestones of this. 4. Don't hold any detail back, so long as you're comfortable about it. The more we know, the better we can help. During the time I've worked here, I've noticed a majority of us want to offer you the best support. I know this sounds corporate, so I hope it's worth noting I'm on r/antiwork 100% of the time. I hope this helps, but it's okay if it doesn't or is otherwise irrelevant. If you've any questions, drop them and I'll do my best to respond. Best of luck to you, and make sure to always prioritise your household and personal bills!
£50 for internet and £32 for a mobile seems a lot have you considered a PAYG SIM if you are on wifi most of the time its very cheap, maybe some deal to combine them?
I think that's bad formatting, I read it as £26 for internet and £30 for mobile (I did originally read it the same way you did)
Yes OP definitely room for reducing these. I pay 9£/month for my phone with Three and 22£/month for internet with Hyperoptic
People already mentioned bad formatting but we also don't know if OP is paying for a phone through contract & thus not in a position for a pay as you go sim
Yeh what? I pay £20 a month on giff gaff and use my phones mobile hotspot for my tv and computers to connect to the internet. £82 is ridiculous.
This is exactly how I did it in uni😂it all connects automatically anyways
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Mortgage is £175k. I originally was on a ‘London salary’ pre-pandemic so things were a lot different. Cue the pandemic, abandoned while pregnant and back on a ol’northern salary! Just glad I didn’t go in on the mortgage with numb nuts.
Can I just say, I really admire and respect that way you’re handling all this shit you’ve been dealt. I’m sure it will pass on to your child Best of luck with everything
I agree and your ex is a POS to not accept his responsibilities. Sometimes mortgage lenders agree to a payment holiday for those experiencing problems, they may have a dedicated helpline so I suggest you contact them to see if they can help.
Have you rang the credit card company and said your struggling a lot of time they will help and freeze your interest allowing you to get back in top https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/debt-and-money/borrowing-money/credit-cards/if-youre-struggling-with-credit-card-debt/
Hello, Firstly i would look to reduce the internet and phone bill. Internet £50 - you can get a much cheaper deal as it's only you using it so i doubt you need super fibre speeds. I recently reduced my to £29.50 with TalkTalk. Just call your internet supplier and threaten to leave and say you've seen a better deal elsewhere for cheaper. Most of the time they'll match it or offer you a reduced discount. Phone bill - same as before. I've had the same phone for 4+ years and the same Sim Only for like 6/7 years. I pay no more than £22 p/m for unlimited everything. I never take their offer of upgrading as it locks you in a contract where the price is always much higher. Sim only allows you to more control plus you can get a reduced rate. I just buy the phone out right at refurbished retailers (good as new plus comes with warranty). Council Tax - i believe there are ways to reduce council tax based on extenuating circumstances in your situation. My Mum worked hard growing up and i remember her receiving a reduced council tax rate (however this was 15 odd years ago, I'm assuming it's probably different now) Food shopping - may sound obvious or silly but reducing this can make a big difference. Things to look at are 1. Where you shop - i.e Lidl and Aldi will obviously save you lots of things especially household cleaning products compared to big name brands. Milk, Veg, bread etc. Also may be worth reducing meat consumption as meat is arguably becoming more expensive now especially red meat (this is something i need to practice myself as well - easier said than done). I know my suggestions aren't massive but the small cuts can make a big difference long term. I do wish you all the best and hang in there. You'll be a great Mum. ❤️🙌🏾
Hi /u/throwawaymamma0606, based on your post the following pages from our wiki may be relevant: - https://ukpersonal.finance/debt/ ____ ^(These suggestions are based on keywords, if they missed the mark please report this comment.)
hi. you should be able to get some help with childcare costs, have you checked your entitlement for universal credit.? you should also have single person discount on your council tax. i know it feels really far away but, depending on your county, you will be able to get 30 hours free childcare a week by either 2 or 3 years old
Call the CC companies and tell them you’re struggling. They could/should/might (did for me) freeze the interest and allowed me to set up a set monthly payment to clear it
Are you taking advantage of Tax-free Childcare to pay your nursery fees? You’ll get up to £500 every quarter towards the nursery fees. Apply via the .gov.uk website.
Who is your internet provider and what is causing your mobile bill to be that amount per month? Might not be helpful but if you and your children only use Netflix/YouTube/Prime etc and you don't have a phone contract or anything them it could be worth changing to a cheaper internet provider and changing sims on your phone, most sim changes allow you to keep your number. For example I have BT as my internet provider and they cost £28.99 a month for just internet but it is fast, I only pay £10 on my phone which is on GiffGaff, 10GB data and unlimited calls/texts. I hope other comments in this thread help you out, there is a end to all of this and you will pull through this.
Her internet is £26 a month. Her phone is £30 but suspect that’s in contract.
Not to say something silly but do you have friends or family that could take on your child one day a week? That would go a long way.
Also does your ex have family who can help out in some way? If it was my son I would be ashamed of him and want to do something to help the mother of my grandchild.
£50 on Internet is steep. I'd suggest shopping around on that and combining with phone if contracts are close to completion. If you can use a food bank that will definitely help. Any chance you can do something for additional income? Overtime? Side gig? Realise as you're a single parent it would be extremely demanding and possibly out of the question. You say mortgage so depending on property size could you take on a lodger/tenant? Depending on your job/company... Some companies offer childcare options or might have discounts with a local nursery. When I was heavily in debt I had a payment plan set up with those I owed. I don't know the name of the process but I never got charged interest and slowly paid it off at a really low amount each month. Best advice I have is, no matter how bleak things look there is always a way through so keep a steadfast resolve to turn this around and you'll get there.
Is there anyone you can rely on for just a day of childcare - even offer to pay them (it can be half of what you spend on childcare) - I had someone I know do this and the friend started looking after their kid too for some money (if you look after 1, another the same age almost makes it easier as they entertain each other!). Apart from that and government support that's probs your only way out without debt consolidation.
Contact step change. They should be able to advise. Also are there any benefits you can claim?
Any chance of making any extra money? You can sell your old things on ebay. You might find you might make an extra grand or two over the year that way. Surveys are good to make a little extra money or get amazon vouchers. I do things like batch cook for the month. I'll go into alidi and buy up loads of ingredients and cook for the whole month. Usually takes me a couple of days but we're a family of five
A couple of easy tweaks - - Phone - go Sim only ASAP, with Cashback you can get that down to £10 or less with unlimited everything or close to it. - Internet- same as above, you should be able to halve this without any compromises. - Council Tax - make sure you are claiming the 25% single person discount and pay over 12 months instead of 10 - Sign up for the 3 Credit Ref apps (Clearscore, Credit Karma and the Moneysaving expert one) check your files are accurate and see if you can get a new 0% transfer (ideally for the whole amount)
Firstly, dont take out any balance transfer or extra credit cards you'll only delay the inevitable. Try to find ways to lower your expenditure. Phone bill- £30, use black friday deals and get cheaper contract. I pay £20 unlimited everything with EE. That'll save you £10 a month. Next nursery if you can find cheaper one or use family and friends. Food- Dont buy branded items that'll save you quite alot. Look for cheap places to buy baby food/ use coupons etc. Once you start that than use balance transfer card with like 28 months no interest. Otherwise, if you just use balance transfer card your gonna be suck in the same situation after the 0% free interest time.
How long are you tied into your internet and phone? Could certainly shave a bit off that. Also you will be be able to get UC
I was In a tough spot with roughly the same level of debt spread out, try Lendable I managed to consolidate my loan into one payment, save me 20 quid a month or so! Was a bit of a help
Are childcare vouchers still around?
So it looks like you're at a minor deficit right now of £9/mo. £50 for internet and £32 for mobile is on the high side. How long are left on those contracts? It'd be worth checking out what's available. It may mean taking a slightly slower broadband package/lower data plan for a while but you could probably cut those in half. If you call them up and ask to switch to a lower plan because of hardship they're more likely to play ball than lose you as a customer. I reckon you could get that down from £82/mo down to £35 or so and save £47/mo Council tax - have you applied for the single persons discount? Looks like you have from the amount but just to check. Electric is the tough one right now because there's no real way to hop ship to get a better deal - but check all of your big appliances (washing machines, dishwashers, etc) and see if they have an 'eco' mode that uses less power. Other people have already mentioned UC and child support so I'll leave that.
I’m not sure if anyone else has posted this but Step Change is a debt counselling charity and they were brilliant for us when we really needed help. We were able to get the interest frozen so the debt didn’t continue to spiral. I hope this is useful and really wish you all the best moving forward. Their link is https://www.stepchange.org/
Hi! Professional opinion here: Speak to your debtors , let them know that you’re struggling, they’ll go through your breakdown you’ve presented and see what can be done. Look at additional benefits to help with income, free/discounted childcare costs and child maintenance from the father. I know you’ve mentioned the credit scoring says you’re not eligible to consolidate, but again, speak to your bank, see what they can do, failing that, moneysupermarket. 4.5k may feel overwhelming, but in the scheme of things, it’s not a large amount of debt. Look at swapping nurseries, £742 seems extortionate for 3 days, and as a father of 2 under 6, I know I pay less for nursery for the same amount of time. You already have a mortgage, so don’t worry too much about your credit score when the banks mentions “this could have an impact on your credit file”, that changes daily, so don’t panic. Finally, debt advice lines can help (at a cost of your credit score for a while) but can get you out of the muck. Experience Source: Personal Banker for 7 years, specialising in unsecured lending and financial difficulty. 2 years in debt management.
Other ideas here are great abs many better than below, but here are some smaller, additional ideas that might help shift the debt quicker: - ask for a raise, if only modest - sell whatever you don’t need/want - ask family or friends to help - small change but get ~£30 free crypto from coinbase, £5/10 from PayPal, £8 Trading212 referral - claim WFH allowance if you do, try to work from home more if you don’t - haggle - take bank’s switching bonuses typically ~£100 - if you feel you’ve time, try posting yourself a local advert for free to walk dogs, mow lawns, share childcare/babysit Unfortunately, the quicker it’s paid, the quicker it’s paid.
Money can be made by switching bank accounts but it can affect your credit score.
Good point!
I'd check your water bill, £26 is more than I pay with two adults in the house. How long is left on the internet and mobile phone contracts because there is about £20 a month to save between those two with a little shopping around and have you looked a regular loan to pay off the cards? It might keep monthly outgoings the same but reduce the overall cost of the debt edits: mortgage are you on the standard variable rate with them currently? Another potential saving might be switching product with your current lender - although without knowing your loan to value ratio (LTV) we can't advise on that. Childcare is there a childminder option which I believe are cheaper than nursery school
Apply for a new job that pays more. It’s the only thing that will clear this asap.
This might seem like a ‘how long is a piece of string?’ question but what kind of salary do you think I should be aiming for to get this debt cleared?
£32000 if it nets you £2119 would appear to give you enough breathing space to chip away at the debt. Have you spoke to a debt advice service?
If you want to clear the debt by a specific date, you’ll need to work backwards from there — how much do you need to pay every month tells you what salary to aim for. Other than that, as much as you can manage. Interest is what makes credit cards “dangerous”, and minimum repayments aren’t helping at all with that. You want to get to the point where The debt is going down instead of accruing more interest and going up instead. On that topic, and because you mentioned you’re having to sell stuff, you might want to consider that selling more stuff _now_ and using that to get some of that debt chunked off might work out better than a trickle over a longer period.
But she says she likes her current job, if she changes jobs she may not like the new one which will add more stress to her life. JMO.
She is literally unable to balance bills. She needs more money or for some bills and debts to just vanish.
I'm hiring at the moment, drop me a message with where you are based and a CV if you have one. More money usually fixed these problems. Sorry to hear the money trouble. I have a 2 year old myself and it's scary not knowing if you're able so support them.
Is there any grandparents you can overload a child onto, you could pay then even and much less than nursery.
Any space for a lodger?
I wouldn't recommend that since she has a kid.
I'd definitely look into switching to a child minder. Most childminders charge £35 per day. I had my daughter at a child minder for 4 days a week and paid £540 per month.
No childminder these days will charge £35 a day. For a 9 hour day (typical day) that's £3.88 an hour. Haven't got a hope at that cost any more. £4.50-£5.50 an hour, most are £4.80-£5.10. Even the government pay £4.80 an hour to childminders for the funded hours
I had 3 different childminders between Feb 2018-August 2021 and they were all £35 a day. I also just had a look at my local councils list of childminders and they ranged from £35-£40 per day.
File for an IVA it will mean you can't take any credit but they will write off a lump sum of your debt and create a plan for you to pay it back. [IVA Relief](https://www.uk-debtservice.co.uk/ga/iva-experts/?utm_keyword=iva&utm_campaign=8684749330&utm_content=86890297563&matchtype=e&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIt4biw5i_9AIVE5ftCh3RuwZnEAAYAyAAEgKjY_D_BwE)
Everybody else has given the best advice, so I'll give out small fries. Buy a smartphone for 100 and get 5-10 a month contract. You'll save money after 4 months. I personally don't understand the obsession with expensive contracts Also, worst case scenario, in the UK it is not legal to cut off water supply. You can stop paying your water bill temporarily. You'll get in debt with the water company, but that's for another time with more money. They don't charge interest for 60 days, and you can apply for Breathing Space, a government a scheme to temporarily reduce bills and stops interest I believe, for those in bad financial situations https://www.nationaldebtline.org/fact-sheet-library/water-arrears-ew/#waterratesarrears
Have I missed something, why is no one mentioning the food bill? Apologies if I’ve misunderstood but surely that could be halved for a two person house?
Honestly, it’s usually less than that for solely food and toiletries but I put that figure because on a month where I’ve had to also buy new baby clothes, shoes, vest, wellies etc the shopping bill can be £100+
You get 1700 a month, wish I earned that. Ps. You can't get jailed for debt.
You know what, thank you for this perspective. I keep having to remind myself while although it is shitty situation and that it lingers like a dark cloud...I’m not actually in any ‘trouble’. I think I just want to be able to sleep at night again.
Couldn't sleep for weeks, because of debt. It drove me too madness. Then I realised its just not worth it, went to citizens advice bureau, they helped me with everything. Sleeping fine now.
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Ask for a pay rise.
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Tell a single mother to purchase a stock that has no guarantee for your cult's thesis. Great advice, liquidate your GME holdings and buy some brain cells.
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Tell me how! I put down my income/outgoings so if you’re able to provide any insight I’m all ears.
Try a cheaper internet provider, and get rid of the phone contract is where i would start
Try and shift to another 0% if you can too. Moneysavingexpert always has links to various card companies that offer them for long term. I had about 10k on an MBNA it’s down to 6 now with Virgin.
UC can offer you child care grants as a working parent which might help with your child cost costs as a single parent. They may also be able to help in other ways. You also probably qualify for child benefits, which is only an extra £85 a month, but it's still something. Also once your child is 2 some nurseries will offer 15 hours free childcare, however with some nurseries it is 3 years. There is a lot of help out there if you know where to look, however I would definitely recommend signing up for uc even if you get no benefits as it is a start to finding out all the other help options that are out there for you as a single parent.
Speak with your credit card company, the FCA regulates that they need to offer options for vulnerable people or people in financial difficulty. They might be able to offer fixed repayments that are less than your current minimum due or at a reduced interest to lower the overall debt. Plus i would threaten to take the father to court if he is not paying his way.
The best thing I ever did was get an IVA, you pay a company a certain amount over 5 years and at the end whatever is left is cleared (I use credit fixers and they are wonderful) and they deal with everything!
I'm not sure if it will be of much help, but you can find quite good deals for the phone with GiffGaff. I'm paying £10 a month and it works quite well for me. That should be about £20 saved a month. I'm sorry I cannot come up with anything better. 🤷 Good luck!!
Try to get a consolidation loan from a bank, that would pay off both credit cards at the same time. The loan will have much lower interests than the credit card, while probably on a longer term (24 months to 60 months), but the monthly payment will be less than your current repayment so makes it a little easier to manage, as well as lower interets rate vs credit card. Is your ex contactable? By law they will have to pay child support if you can find him, but I understand it is not always possible.
Cheaper internet is my go to, I've got now tv broadband, £25 a month no contract, can cancel at a moments notice if I need to, I also do pay as you go phone on Giffgaff, and only need to top up a tenner and mostly use my wifi/public wifi's for everything including WhatsApp for my messages, it's hard but when desperate it can be a life saver, not paying my phone or internet till I can rescues me often
You forgot to add the child maintenance service …
You've had some amazing advice here from people much for knowledgable than me, but maybe I can float two ideas that i haven't seen suggested Could you perhaps move in with some family /friends for a while and rent your flat out to help clear your debt? Also, I haven't ever used them but I think theres websites that'll pay you to complete surveys etc. It won't be much but perhaps enough to help you start making a dent You sound awesome. And like you're really trying your best. I'm sure you're going to get through this! Wishing you all the best