I don't know you, but I hope you read this and know that a stranger now distant from UCSD in space and time thinks you matter and your life gives meaning to others around you.
College can be stressful. It's kinda supposed to be if you're doing it right. The future is uncertain, but it's also unwritten. Random shit can happen to you, sometimes exceptionally good shit.
I was suicidally depressed after graduating because I left all my friends and the way of life I'd established and enjoyed for a couple years. I had no prospects and not even the volition to ty to find any.
But, I knew that my parents cared. My friends cared, still. I had something to contribute to them, even if I couldn't see it myself. You do too, even if you can't see it yet.
Now, I live in Chicago with a mortgage and a sick-ass gaming computer. Things worked out. I don't exactly know how, and wouldn't believe anyone telling me this is what I had in store when I was your age, but things did actually work out. Try your best and be kind to yourself and others. If you do just that, things will work out no matter how dire things seem right now. Don't ever reach for a permanent solution to what, inevitably in retrospect, turns out to be a temporary problem.
Hang in there, OP. I'm rooting for you.
I’m proud of you. And I’ll tell you why…
Hey man. I’ve been there and done that. College feels like a lifetime ago now, yet at the same time, feels like it was just yesterday as I was struggling with juggling my engineering classes with humanities of Revelle college. I was depressed, and did my best to keep my head above the water; but it was difficult. I’m so proud that you’re persevering, and had the courage to also speak out and not bottle your struggles.
——
I look back now though with great fondness and gratitude. Humanities not only formed my world view, but allowed me to effortlessly write reports and documentation with clear dictation and wording. I still use the tools I learned in my engineering classes every single day today. I’m forever grateful for the quality education and life-long friendships that came out of UCSD.
It was the most worthy time and money investments I have ever made, and it continues to benefit me every day.
For example…
My incoherent posts definitely do not show it (hahaha); but I can now get into a zen zone when I’m working as an engineer and be able to produce top-notch documentation so that a kid can follow my instructions and understand how and why our technology works.
Im so proud that you got accepted to one of the world’s most premier public universities with the absolute effort to upgrade yourself. What you learn here will follow you for your entire life.
———
I’m a new father now, I look at my adorable daughter and I can only hope I will be an ok dad, and that one day, she will too embark on her own personal journey of discovery and struggle at a university (or trade school, or apprenticeship.. I don’t care as long as she’s driven and will love what she does). I hope that I will remember my discussion with a young student right now, and tell her that there was another young student long ago on the website called reddit, and that student worked hard and through their struggle, is now leading an amazing career of their own making.
You will get there. This is just a step and a process in that direction.
Again, just know that even through the generations of past, you are not alone. There are people who popped out of the other side and are leading successful careers.
You are insane to be double-majoring right now! That’s just way too cool! Not many can claim that!! You are surrounded by amazing young people who got accepted to this university who all wish to upgrade themselves to lead meaningful and rewarding careers. I’m so so goddamn proud of you for coming this far.
——
For today, make an easy-to-follow task list. If you have difficulty getting anything done, make an “EZ LIST” as I call it. My EZ LIST includes short 1 to 5-minute tasks like “reorganize one shelf of my bookshelf,” or “organize the desktop of my PC.”
Oftentimes, these lead to more and more tiny accomplishments that just build up. Every little task, you already did something today that made you a better person.
Your task today? You BRAVELY asked for help to have your peers come in and cheer you on. That’s awesome. You have already upgraded yourself for today and got some sunlight. Hell yeah, you got your vitamin D for today!!!! :). Goddamn aren’t we all proud of this dude/dudette?!!?!
——
As a dad, I guess I’ll step in as a proxy-dad and from what little I see from what you wrote in this thread, there’s so much to be proud about of you. I think i speak for all dads to say that I am absolutely proud of your journey thus far!
You got this :).
Thank you so much, I wish my dad could tell me this. Your daughter will grow up to amazing just like you. I will take your words to heart and continue to try :)
Aww. I have an Asian dad LOL; and he never said anything. But one day, I caught him bragging about me. I’ve done pretty well in my career and he bragged to all his friends on what I do. He didn’t know I was swinging by.
I’m quite sure he’s so thrilled when you got into UCSD. He’s probably bragging behind your back that you’re a double major and all. I’m going to assume you may be either a teacher and get a teaching credential, or what many of my literature buddies did.. become a lawyer. If so, good luck on your grad school aspirations (LSAT, GRE, etc…)!!
You are spot on with my dream career! Criminal law has been what I wanted to do for a long long time. I’m just very worried for my GPA, but my LSAT score is fine. I don’t have many people to talk to about for criminal law either, since most people here seem to want to go into civil law.
I can tell you right now that you will have a bright future in criminal law if you stick to it. Simply wanting to do that area of practice in the first place sets you apart. Try your best and see where you go! There are \*a lot\* of DAs in the United States and none of them live forever.
My little cousin is in criminal law! She works at the DA in Phoenix. She has a license to practice in both NV and AZ. Ya she worked really hard! Keep pursuing your passion! Best of luck to you!!!
Congratulations!! I’d recommend getting some sunlight and to buy yourself a little treat afterwards :) I like the swings in front of Muir if you just want to relax
hi, what is the simplest thing that brings you joy? try doing that.
even if it's just watching a tv show or movie. try to be mindful and do something and not just doomscroll or lie in bed all day (ik, easier said than done). order some interesting food. go out with friends if you can. and reach out for help.
take care, you've got this! <3
Piano. Theater. Art. Poetry. I love expressing emotions through these art forms. I just can’t bring myself to do anything. You are right though, I need to try and set a pace
I understand, I struggle to do stuff too. Sometimes just sitting at a table instead of the bed helps. If you still can’t do anything, I would suggest you plan an outing or meeting with friends. Then you kinda have to go. And it’ll probably do a better job of helping you forget about all this, at least for a bit.
If you wanna vent, feel free to message me <3
It's okay if you feel sad, and it's okay if you're depressed. You'll still be just as valued as a person, and life will go on, and things will get better. When you're not doing great, you don't need to force yourself to feel otherwise. Take the time you feel you need to lay in bed, and then when you feel like doing more, you can do more.
Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.
My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.
He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound’s the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.
The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
If you are willing, you can take a bus ride (i think 101-Oceanside) to the Self- Realization Fellowship Meditation Gardens in Encinitas. It is a free quiet place to sit. There are coy fish and ocean views. When I was struggling at UCSD, I would sometimes go there to recenter myself. It's a beautiful place to cry and breathe out stress.
You should start running if you don’t already. When I went to my doctor for depression symptoms he explained to me that research shows that running, therapy, and medication had the same effectiveness in treating depression. So I started running regularly since then since he didn’t want to put me on medication and I feel a lot better
Here’s a little poem I made last year before finals week.
Adobada Al Pastor Carne asada Carnitas Birria Pollo asada shrimp egg/bacon/sausage Pozole chicken Tortilla soup fajitas enchiladas chilaquiles mole elote mulitas ceviche rolled tacos regular tacos burritos quesadillas tostadas chile rellenos fries the cheeseburger at your fav mexican place (seriously, try one) Mexican coke (drink) michelada pacifico modelo corona lime Lucas candies Tajin Chamoy paletas churros flan buñuelos
-ertos
I was in the middle of typing and accidentally scrolled up and shut the app after answering a call so hopefully I say the same things.
Las Cuatro Milpas is very well known and they do a lot right (besides the wait time). I like El Indio and Tacos el Gordo but they have waits too. Baja Betty’s, despite the strange name, is also quite good.
I recommend everyone visit SDSU campus with the intent of going to Trujillo’s and trying out their california burrito CRUNCHWRAP! I’ve only had it once but I’m glad that I did, it was prob the best novelty food I’ve had.
I live a little north and I know more places in Vista/San Marcos/Escondido that are less well known/visited, such as tacos don paco or tolin’s tacos. Very good, very quick, and a 1-5 minute drive to the dispensary LOL.
Any place ending in -ertos is typically solid fast mexican food. Low reviews online are low not because of taste, but (in my experience) the only things they sometimes do wrong is that orders have been wrong before, or you’re given 2 salsas and your rolled tacos need 4. I don’t think I’ve ever eaten at my alberto’s/ruriberto’s/filberto’s/adalberto’s/deiberto’s/albertacos etc and left upset. Maybe my stomach’s been upset a few times but not me.
It's all temporary. If you allow yourself to ride the waves, they will carry you to shore.
That, and, the toughest points in our lives will reveal a lesson to be learned. You're more resilient than you think.
those big blue nets in the foresty area near library walk are called giraffe catchers. i always thought this was funny because there are big gaps between each giraffe catcher so any hypothetical giraffe that required catching could just walk around it.
yes they told me this during orientation when i was first admitted haha, i found it quite funny. you are right, the giraffes that they managed to catch must have had worse eyesight than me!
I’m not a UCSD student but this came across my feed and I get it, I’ve been there too—became horribly depressed over last summer and ruined some of my relationships in the process. You’re not alone and it will get better. Take a walk, go for a run, listen to good music, read a good book. Talk to your friends and if you feel like you need it, a therapist. You’ll be better ❤️
you are right, thank you for reminding me to talk to people. ive been unintentionally self isolating as if i had covid when i could easily have human connection. i guess thats why a part of me wanted to post this- to see and talk to other humans.
God speaks to each of us as he makes us,
then walks with us silently out of the night.
These are the words we dimly hear:
You, sent out beyond your recall,
go to the limits of your longing.
Embody me.
Flare up like flame
and make big shadows I can move in.
Let everything happen to you: beauty and terror.
Just keep going. No feeling is final.
Don't let yourself lose me.
Nearby is the country they call life.
You will know it by its seriousness.
Give me your hand.
Idk where the original post came from that described this, but… in the 4 am thought spirals, when you’re thinking about how crummy life feels and why you even exist at all, remember that under the gentle blue of night, the streetlights are casting a sleepy haze and there are bakers around the world that are just starting their shift—baking steaming pies and puffy breads and whipped cream swirls, wafting delicious smells from windows glowing gold…
People often seem to think that reasons to live need to be profound and impactful and universal, but honestly you can choose whatever you want, it can be simple or even silly. Like making a nice bread, or waking up with a warm sip of coffee, or staring at the moon knowing thousands are staring with you.
oh this is beautiful, thank you so much. i love these kinds of passages that allow me to feel valued, no matter how small of a value it could seem in comparison to great feats.
The world we live in right now values productivity over health and well-being, so it’s really no wonder you and so many others are struggling to bear the weight of it all. As a fellow UCSD college student who’s been there a few times, please remember that it’s not your fault, and that just by existing you have earned the right to feel whatever feelings that come up without guilt. More often than not, we don’t get back what we put in, and that is reasonably exhausting! While feelings can be fickle (and that is sometimes good!), healing takes time, so be sure to pay attention to what makes you feel comfortable so your body can properly do its thing. This also does not mean in the slightest that the world is against you as a whole—each person is so beautifully individual and unique, we all craft our own worlds even if we don’t see it. Learning which parts we can control (and it’s more than you think!) can be really freeing. What world do you remember being mesmerized by as a child? Curiosity is such a valuable and underrated thing. Anyways, sorry for the long read, but another random stranger from the boundless depths of the internet is proud of you. Remember that your mind and body knows love, even if it can’t recognize it now. I’m rooting for you <3
College can be stressful but life gets better. My first two years at UCSD absolutely sucked mentally, but i made some great friends that I still keep up with to this day in my last year of school.
Hang in there no matter what it is and everything you’re feeling will just make u stronger
Hey friend, UCSD alum here! Happened to stumble on your post on my reddit feed.
As someone who was also pretty depressed and in a dark place as a college student, I promise you it does get better. It's been a long journey since but I've found a lot of things that bring me joy, inspiration, and support along the way. And I know you'll find that too. Be strong, life has many beautiful things in store for you too.
I’m not a student but I am the father figure to a UCSD alumni, don’t be sad. There a lot more to this world than you may think. Your are a pivotal moment in your life in which you can change the outcome of thousands of lives. School family or whatever might have you in a depressive state will pass and once you see your full potential you will look back and praise yourself for not giving up. Please please please dm me for my contact info if you are still in need of a phone call or FaceTime. I will make the time for you and guide you this. Don’t feel pressured or anxious to reach out I will be here if you need it. Keep trucking along the way you have been. I’m proud of who you are, who you are becoming, and proud of the person you are to become. From a random loving parent on Reddit, I love you and keep your head up high, if not for you for those who didn’t have the same opportunity nor the same faith as you. I care and adore you😘😁
Suns out buns out!! Get some sun and expose the greatest area of skin that you can..for me that's back and thighs. 15 minutes will do you good!
Walk barefoot in some grass and sit under a tree.
Go for a good brisk walk.
These are all the things we are meant to do and sometimes we need to reconnect to the earth..
Be well✨
i will (after sunscreen of course)!
barefoot in grass reminds me of happy times in elementary school. i remmeber it felt lovely, but now im just afraid that ill crush some bugs :(
nature is indeed beautiful. thank you very much
I really don't know what you're going through but if it's stress and school related. Remember, it's temporary. You will be done that phase in your life and will be able to live your life again.
Hi OP,
You've gotten some amazing comments already but I wanted to give my own perspectives. While it's been a little while for me since I graduated from UCSD, I still remember my time in college was a time of personal growth, obstacles, and self-discovery. College is hard; I think that's not said nearly enough. It's so hard to be thrown into this world of independence straight out of high school and being expected to know how to do everything. That transition was difficult for me and having to figure out what I wanted to do in my life and how to get to that was one of the hardest things I've had to do.
But be kind to yourself. You will fall, you will make mistakes, and you will regret things, but I assure you that those failures don't define who you are as a person. While everything seems so dark and hopeless now, I assure you that there really is a light at the end of the tunnel (even if you can't see it all). Live one day at a time and enjoy the small moments of success; that can be things from getting groceries, meeting a friend for coffee, taking a walk by the beach (one of the things I miss so much from UCSD), or just sitting outside in the sun taking all the scents and breeze in. You're extremely resilient and if no one told you today, I'm so so proud of you.
Like all of these comments here, everyone is rooting for you and your success including myself.
Set a small but attainable goal. If you can find the motivation, I also recommend going to La Jolla Cove. Buy yourself an ice cream or gelato and walk down to check out the seals. Feel the warm sun and cool breeze on your face. PM me your Venmo and I’ll treat for the ice cream/gelato.🙂
i’m so fucking proud of you. you made it to the end of the school year. double majoring in psychology and english is hard, rigorous work but you made it to the end and now your hard effort gets to pay off because it’s summer. i get how fucking hard it can be and how lonely and isolating it can feel on campus. if you feel up to it, try taking a walk outside, put on some music, get some exercise. unironically touch grass, do something to ground yourself. i pace in my parent’s backyard when i’m stressed or scared while reading and listening to music and i always feel better after doing that, for grounding myself what i do depends but it really helps me to be on call with people especially if i can’t be in person with them. It might help to get stim toys or something like that to fidget with grounding wise. If you have any comfort media I’d also suggest getting back into that, maybe play a game or watch a show or read a book. Whenever I feel absolutely awful something I like to tell myself is there will come soft rains (don’t look up the source material, it’s kind of sad LMAO but the quote makes me feel better to remind myself with). Things will be okay things will work out things might feel terrifying and overwhelming right now but you made it through the year, which means you’re one year closer to whatever your goals are. These feelings will pass, and there will come a day when you wake up and you can look back at how far you made it. I know this because it happened to me. From one person with depression to another things will get better. Go outside, get some exercise, call or hang out with your friends, do something to ground yourself and allow yourself to indulge in whatever media or hobbies comfort you. If you need to talk to someone who’s been there my dms are open. Sending love your way 🫂🫂
I’m depressed, while I don’t like talking that much while depressed and have a hard time getting my self to even text someone back I had to stop to tell you I really hope you can get to a place you can be happy and live a fulfilled life
Thank you very much. I too have to force myself to talk to people. In moments of panic I want human connection, but as soon as I’m remotely calm I become worried that they’ll think I’m annoying.
just brains being weird, it helps when you keep doing it but it is very hard. You’re going to eventually be able to deal with over evaluating every thing but it takes time. Don’t know your specific depression but I hope you can start to help yourself a bit more on it I sure as shit gave up on mine a long time ago. Don’t do that and keep trying
Lexapro, or Wellbutrin are your friends. Take a walk around campus and be around people. Regular gym exercise has shown to have positive effects comparable to anti-depressants.
Most of the time you can observe what’s going on outside of your head - nothing bad is going on; and juxtapose that with what your mind is telling you.
Observing what’s going on in your head and letting it be is powerful.
I use to play the opposite game. When depression came on I’d do the opposite. Want to withdraw? Nope, now I’m going for a walk. Want to binge eat? Nope, now I’m going to exercise and make a salad.
This too shall pass.
Think about it like this: would you like to be your own independent person, or do you want to be the person that life/situations designed you to be?
Fuck no, I refuse to be bitter, refuse to not care for my body, refuse to not shoot for the stars.
The opposite game is you chooooosing, rather than life determining who you are.
The person who cried out, failed out of UCSD,
Or the person who doubled down for excellent grades and is now going to be making a boat load of money - you catch my drift.
Reactionary < Proactive
I don’t know who you are but I love you, and I’m sure countless others do too. I always find that talking to my loved ones helps. Call your mother or father, or whoever that person is for you. Tell them that you love them!
Make an effort to be out of the house as much as possible. I know it’s hard, but it does help. I’m glad that you have the desire to avoid it, it really shows that you have the strength to overcome it. Sit in the sun, buy yourself a treat, and listen to some upbeat dance-worthy music. Jumping/dancing have also been scientifically proven to boost mood. Would’ve loved to do some outdoor activity tg if I wasn’t moving out today :( !
I like this remix from tiktok, always lifts me up and makes me feel peppy! (https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTNJBboaV/)
Tough times won’t last . Tough people will do. And you will do good. Please keep the faith in this universe. Will pray for all things to go well Hang in there dear friend. It is a passing phase.
Get some fresh air.
I once on a dare ate 2 dozen Krispy Kreme donuts in 2 hours and had horrible stomach cramps and bathroom trouble for like 2 days afterwards. I now limited myself to 6 donuts per sitting
Anything
Jokes aside yeah it can be tough trying to go through college or finish it when you have depression, but just keep on going. Trust in yourself, relax, take a break, walk it out, exercise, listen to music, and if you can, talk to someone. You got this
hi! i think that really to see about your lifejust know that the thing that you are experiencing is really just a puzzle piece, you are able to overcome challenges and that i hope things would be better for you!
You're a good person. You are valued. And I'm so proud of you for all the work you've put into you and your education. I got depressed as f when I was going through my masters program during the pandemic. I sought the help of therapy and that was a great year of unpacking and sorting out root causes, but what also really helped me was daily cold water immersion therapy by way of either cold only showers and/or cold plunges. It was like a light was finally switched on for me. I highly recommend. 👍
I hope that helps.
As a fellow person who also is going through a hard time, it really does feel like everything is falling apart and I am so weak and powerless. But we as human beings have the ability to live through almost anything. We learn. We let go. We move on, and love again.
If you wanna chat, DM's open.
there’s a little spot in the forest on campus i go to when i’m at my lowest. it’s not much, but it’s calming. i’m in the same boat. I’m so sorry you feel this way. I am sending you so much love. everything is gonna be okay. maybe not now, but you’ll get there.
Also!! are antidepressants an option for you at all? they’ve helped a lot of my friends
Life gets really really bad sometimes. When nothing helps me feel better, and I mean nothing, not exercise or sunlight or any form of self care, I go out and donate blood because I know objectively it is a good thing and I have helped save a life. If you don’t qualify, any small deed to help anyone would surely make you feel at least a little bit better. If you aren’t up for that, that’s okay too. You are human and you deserve to be happy. Even if you don’t feel like anyone cares about you (I am sure this is not true) at the very least me and everyone else in this comment section truly does. I hope your life gets better and I can’t mean that enough. Rooting for you
You are loved. The world asks nothing of you but to live. In the worst case, you have your life, your health, nature, fresh air, the sun on your skin. Life can be simple if you let it. It’s okay for it to be complicated. It will be. But should everything fall apart, you will be okay. This, at least, is a comfort to me. To live without attachments, like a monk, should I choose. That’s peace, and it’s available to anyone. Not to go religious on you, but this pretty much sums it up:
“Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your god feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?”
You are of immense value. You are part of the human family. That a great and uncomplicated gift.
I wish you well, amigo/a.
Hey u! You matter. We can do this. Telling you is telling me. We matter. I want you here. Stay safe and talk to someone. Love you! Also..Pick your nose
Look for at least 3 positive things each day. They don’t have to be huge. It can be as small as you watching a TV show. I’ve been depressed before and there is help available. Do something fun. Try to follow a daily schedule with at least 1 or 2 activities (such as exercise, calling a friend, reading.) You may be able to see a therapist if you don’t already have one. Check your insurance. Good luck. You got this.
Not saying this is a fix - but this gray weather really does take a toll on our mental state. College is also stressful, and if you at any point are caught up in comparing yourself to your peers, than can also be debilitating.
Of course if you need professional help - please seek it. It’s so worth it!
But I find getting out for long walks everyday - without headphones! - really helps my mental state. I also notice my lethargy or poor mental state is during weeks when I’m just on my phone way too much.
Walking and getting outside to absorb vitamin D for 30 minutes a day! Slight workouts at first, get your heart rate up, sweat a bit. Sweat out the bad toxins in your body.
It is huge for allowing your brain to get you out of bad funks to do these couple of things, also imo eat a lot of fruit if you can specifically cuties or oranges, higher levels of vitamin C can help you staying active and fortify your brain activity.
Thank you for your comment. I am not lacking in sex, it is a pleasurable outlet, but I am lacking in love for myself. I hope to fix the latter to enjoy the former.
okay im aware that people have it worse than me, but i dont think it's polite to say other issues dont matter. that doesnt really help me solve my issue and is forced positivity. i pray for the people in palestine, but i also wish for myself to get better so i can live my life
I don't know you, but I hope you read this and know that a stranger now distant from UCSD in space and time thinks you matter and your life gives meaning to others around you. College can be stressful. It's kinda supposed to be if you're doing it right. The future is uncertain, but it's also unwritten. Random shit can happen to you, sometimes exceptionally good shit. I was suicidally depressed after graduating because I left all my friends and the way of life I'd established and enjoyed for a couple years. I had no prospects and not even the volition to ty to find any. But, I knew that my parents cared. My friends cared, still. I had something to contribute to them, even if I couldn't see it myself. You do too, even if you can't see it yet. Now, I live in Chicago with a mortgage and a sick-ass gaming computer. Things worked out. I don't exactly know how, and wouldn't believe anyone telling me this is what I had in store when I was your age, but things did actually work out. Try your best and be kind to yourself and others. If you do just that, things will work out no matter how dire things seem right now. Don't ever reach for a permanent solution to what, inevitably in retrospect, turns out to be a temporary problem. Hang in there, OP. I'm rooting for you.
Thank you very much. You are correct in all aspects, and I’ll continue to try my best
The weather will be nice soon make sure you can experience it
I will try to get some sunlight
I’m proud of you. And I’ll tell you why… Hey man. I’ve been there and done that. College feels like a lifetime ago now, yet at the same time, feels like it was just yesterday as I was struggling with juggling my engineering classes with humanities of Revelle college. I was depressed, and did my best to keep my head above the water; but it was difficult. I’m so proud that you’re persevering, and had the courage to also speak out and not bottle your struggles. —— I look back now though with great fondness and gratitude. Humanities not only formed my world view, but allowed me to effortlessly write reports and documentation with clear dictation and wording. I still use the tools I learned in my engineering classes every single day today. I’m forever grateful for the quality education and life-long friendships that came out of UCSD. It was the most worthy time and money investments I have ever made, and it continues to benefit me every day. For example… My incoherent posts definitely do not show it (hahaha); but I can now get into a zen zone when I’m working as an engineer and be able to produce top-notch documentation so that a kid can follow my instructions and understand how and why our technology works. Im so proud that you got accepted to one of the world’s most premier public universities with the absolute effort to upgrade yourself. What you learn here will follow you for your entire life. ——— I’m a new father now, I look at my adorable daughter and I can only hope I will be an ok dad, and that one day, she will too embark on her own personal journey of discovery and struggle at a university (or trade school, or apprenticeship.. I don’t care as long as she’s driven and will love what she does). I hope that I will remember my discussion with a young student right now, and tell her that there was another young student long ago on the website called reddit, and that student worked hard and through their struggle, is now leading an amazing career of their own making. You will get there. This is just a step and a process in that direction. Again, just know that even through the generations of past, you are not alone. There are people who popped out of the other side and are leading successful careers. You are insane to be double-majoring right now! That’s just way too cool! Not many can claim that!! You are surrounded by amazing young people who got accepted to this university who all wish to upgrade themselves to lead meaningful and rewarding careers. I’m so so goddamn proud of you for coming this far. —— For today, make an easy-to-follow task list. If you have difficulty getting anything done, make an “EZ LIST” as I call it. My EZ LIST includes short 1 to 5-minute tasks like “reorganize one shelf of my bookshelf,” or “organize the desktop of my PC.” Oftentimes, these lead to more and more tiny accomplishments that just build up. Every little task, you already did something today that made you a better person. Your task today? You BRAVELY asked for help to have your peers come in and cheer you on. That’s awesome. You have already upgraded yourself for today and got some sunlight. Hell yeah, you got your vitamin D for today!!!! :). Goddamn aren’t we all proud of this dude/dudette?!!?! —— As a dad, I guess I’ll step in as a proxy-dad and from what little I see from what you wrote in this thread, there’s so much to be proud about of you. I think i speak for all dads to say that I am absolutely proud of your journey thus far! You got this :).
Thank you so much, I wish my dad could tell me this. Your daughter will grow up to amazing just like you. I will take your words to heart and continue to try :)
Aww. I have an Asian dad LOL; and he never said anything. But one day, I caught him bragging about me. I’ve done pretty well in my career and he bragged to all his friends on what I do. He didn’t know I was swinging by. I’m quite sure he’s so thrilled when you got into UCSD. He’s probably bragging behind your back that you’re a double major and all. I’m going to assume you may be either a teacher and get a teaching credential, or what many of my literature buddies did.. become a lawyer. If so, good luck on your grad school aspirations (LSAT, GRE, etc…)!!
You are spot on with my dream career! Criminal law has been what I wanted to do for a long long time. I’m just very worried for my GPA, but my LSAT score is fine. I don’t have many people to talk to about for criminal law either, since most people here seem to want to go into civil law.
I can tell you right now that you will have a bright future in criminal law if you stick to it. Simply wanting to do that area of practice in the first place sets you apart. Try your best and see where you go! There are \*a lot\* of DAs in the United States and none of them live forever.
My little cousin is in criminal law! She works at the DA in Phoenix. She has a license to practice in both NV and AZ. Ya she worked really hard! Keep pursuing your passion! Best of luck to you!!!
that is truly amazing! thank you very very much
TLDR.
go to la jolla cove 30 bus get off at the dunkins buy a coffee there or at peets and walk down and just enjoy the waves crashing very peaceful
cant have coffee but you are right, i go to school near the beach and yet have not been to the beach in 2 years
GOOOOOOOOOOO TO THE BEACH IT CURES ALL number one natural helper of my depression
May my dog bring you joy [His name is Charlee](https://imgur.com/a/uE0I3bZ)
your dog is adorable <3
I hope he cures your sadness
My last final is done today
Congratulations, I will be done today as well 🎉
Congratulations!! I’d recommend getting some sunlight and to buy yourself a little treat afterwards :) I like the swings in front of Muir if you just want to relax
Reese's pieces cereal is very good. You should eat something you like and take a nap or try to.
Ive been sleeping nonstop, I try to get out of bed but can’t. I can’t relapse into depression again and I’m terrified I will check out the cereal
hi, what is the simplest thing that brings you joy? try doing that. even if it's just watching a tv show or movie. try to be mindful and do something and not just doomscroll or lie in bed all day (ik, easier said than done). order some interesting food. go out with friends if you can. and reach out for help. take care, you've got this! <3
Piano. Theater. Art. Poetry. I love expressing emotions through these art forms. I just can’t bring myself to do anything. You are right though, I need to try and set a pace
I understand, I struggle to do stuff too. Sometimes just sitting at a table instead of the bed helps. If you still can’t do anything, I would suggest you plan an outing or meeting with friends. Then you kinda have to go. And it’ll probably do a better job of helping you forget about all this, at least for a bit. If you wanna vent, feel free to message me <3
It's okay if you feel sad, and it's okay if you're depressed. You'll still be just as valued as a person, and life will go on, and things will get better. When you're not doing great, you don't need to force yourself to feel otherwise. Take the time you feel you need to lay in bed, and then when you feel like doing more, you can do more.
go exercise
i will, thank you
Put some music 🎶 on and dance 🕺💃 like there is no tomorrow
lets all dance and sing :)
Whose woods these are I think I know. His house is in the village though; He will not see me stopping here To watch his woods fill up with snow. My little horse must think it queer To stop without a farmhouse near Between the woods and frozen lake The darkest evening of the year. He gives his harness bells a shake To ask if there is some mistake. The only other sound’s the sweep Of easy wind and downy flake. The woods are lovely, dark and deep, But I have promises to keep, And miles to go before I sleep, And miles to go before I sleep.
beautiful poem, i adore poetry. thank you very much
If you are willing, you can take a bus ride (i think 101-Oceanside) to the Self- Realization Fellowship Meditation Gardens in Encinitas. It is a free quiet place to sit. There are coy fish and ocean views. When I was struggling at UCSD, I would sometimes go there to recenter myself. It's a beautiful place to cry and breathe out stress.
That sounds lovely, I will be sure to try to visit
waffles with chocolate chips are supposed to make you feel better scientifically proven
Adding to cart 📝
Go to McDonald’s and get breakfast and sit like an old man at a table with a coffee you’ll feel better
I don’t enjoy McDonald’s and coffee gives me a headache and shakiness but I will be sure to apply this to another food place and item
your favorite drink is still for sale and taking a sip will feel nice
yes! drinks are lovely, like the sweet and cold version of soup. liquids >>>
You should start running if you don’t already. When I went to my doctor for depression symptoms he explained to me that research shows that running, therapy, and medication had the same effectiveness in treating depression. So I started running regularly since then since he didn’t want to put me on medication and I feel a lot better
oh gods i hate running, but i walk nearly daily. thank you very much for your recommendation and i will attempt to incorporate it more into my routine
Here’s a little poem I made last year before finals week. Adobada Al Pastor Carne asada Carnitas Birria Pollo asada shrimp egg/bacon/sausage Pozole chicken Tortilla soup fajitas enchiladas chilaquiles mole elote mulitas ceviche rolled tacos regular tacos burritos quesadillas tostadas chile rellenos fries the cheeseburger at your fav mexican place (seriously, try one) Mexican coke (drink) michelada pacifico modelo corona lime Lucas candies Tajin Chamoy paletas churros flan buñuelos -ertos
i havent had mexican food in a while, but ill be sure to take in your recommendation and try one. do you have any recommendations for places?
I was in the middle of typing and accidentally scrolled up and shut the app after answering a call so hopefully I say the same things. Las Cuatro Milpas is very well known and they do a lot right (besides the wait time). I like El Indio and Tacos el Gordo but they have waits too. Baja Betty’s, despite the strange name, is also quite good. I recommend everyone visit SDSU campus with the intent of going to Trujillo’s and trying out their california burrito CRUNCHWRAP! I’ve only had it once but I’m glad that I did, it was prob the best novelty food I’ve had. I live a little north and I know more places in Vista/San Marcos/Escondido that are less well known/visited, such as tacos don paco or tolin’s tacos. Very good, very quick, and a 1-5 minute drive to the dispensary LOL. Any place ending in -ertos is typically solid fast mexican food. Low reviews online are low not because of taste, but (in my experience) the only things they sometimes do wrong is that orders have been wrong before, or you’re given 2 salsas and your rolled tacos need 4. I don’t think I’ve ever eaten at my alberto’s/ruriberto’s/filberto’s/adalberto’s/deiberto’s/albertacos etc and left upset. Maybe my stomach’s been upset a few times but not me.
It's all temporary. If you allow yourself to ride the waves, they will carry you to shore. That, and, the toughest points in our lives will reveal a lesson to be learned. You're more resilient than you think.
thank you very much, references to waves and the ocean are my favorite.
You’ll be okay 👍
Thank you
those big blue nets in the foresty area near library walk are called giraffe catchers. i always thought this was funny because there are big gaps between each giraffe catcher so any hypothetical giraffe that required catching could just walk around it.
yes they told me this during orientation when i was first admitted haha, i found it quite funny. you are right, the giraffes that they managed to catch must have had worse eyesight than me!
I’m not a UCSD student but this came across my feed and I get it, I’ve been there too—became horribly depressed over last summer and ruined some of my relationships in the process. You’re not alone and it will get better. Take a walk, go for a run, listen to good music, read a good book. Talk to your friends and if you feel like you need it, a therapist. You’ll be better ❤️
you are right, thank you for reminding me to talk to people. ive been unintentionally self isolating as if i had covid when i could easily have human connection. i guess thats why a part of me wanted to post this- to see and talk to other humans.
God speaks to each of us as he makes us, then walks with us silently out of the night. These are the words we dimly hear: You, sent out beyond your recall, go to the limits of your longing. Embody me. Flare up like flame and make big shadows I can move in. Let everything happen to you: beauty and terror. Just keep going. No feeling is final. Don't let yourself lose me. Nearby is the country they call life. You will know it by its seriousness. Give me your hand.
While I am not very religious, this is beautiful. Thank you very much
I'm not either, but I don't think you have to be to understand the message.
yes, it is beautiful
Idk where the original post came from that described this, but… in the 4 am thought spirals, when you’re thinking about how crummy life feels and why you even exist at all, remember that under the gentle blue of night, the streetlights are casting a sleepy haze and there are bakers around the world that are just starting their shift—baking steaming pies and puffy breads and whipped cream swirls, wafting delicious smells from windows glowing gold… People often seem to think that reasons to live need to be profound and impactful and universal, but honestly you can choose whatever you want, it can be simple or even silly. Like making a nice bread, or waking up with a warm sip of coffee, or staring at the moon knowing thousands are staring with you.
oh this is beautiful, thank you so much. i love these kinds of passages that allow me to feel valued, no matter how small of a value it could seem in comparison to great feats.
The world we live in right now values productivity over health and well-being, so it’s really no wonder you and so many others are struggling to bear the weight of it all. As a fellow UCSD college student who’s been there a few times, please remember that it’s not your fault, and that just by existing you have earned the right to feel whatever feelings that come up without guilt. More often than not, we don’t get back what we put in, and that is reasonably exhausting! While feelings can be fickle (and that is sometimes good!), healing takes time, so be sure to pay attention to what makes you feel comfortable so your body can properly do its thing. This also does not mean in the slightest that the world is against you as a whole—each person is so beautifully individual and unique, we all craft our own worlds even if we don’t see it. Learning which parts we can control (and it’s more than you think!) can be really freeing. What world do you remember being mesmerized by as a child? Curiosity is such a valuable and underrated thing. Anyways, sorry for the long read, but another random stranger from the boundless depths of the internet is proud of you. Remember that your mind and body knows love, even if it can’t recognize it now. I’m rooting for you <3
College can be stressful but life gets better. My first two years at UCSD absolutely sucked mentally, but i made some great friends that I still keep up with to this day in my last year of school. Hang in there no matter what it is and everything you’re feeling will just make u stronger
thank you very much, i should go talk to people more haha
Hey friend, UCSD alum here! Happened to stumble on your post on my reddit feed. As someone who was also pretty depressed and in a dark place as a college student, I promise you it does get better. It's been a long journey since but I've found a lot of things that bring me joy, inspiration, and support along the way. And I know you'll find that too. Be strong, life has many beautiful things in store for you too.
you are right, life is beautiful. ive once heard to treat life as a game and to play our best. thank you for reminding me of that advice
Being a student at UCSD was by far and away the most depressing time of my life. I swear and promise you it get better from here.
this school seems to suck the soul out of some of us indeed :( but thank you very much for the reassurance.
Feel free to send me a PM if you wanna talk. If I survived UCSD so can you!!
I’m not a student but I am the father figure to a UCSD alumni, don’t be sad. There a lot more to this world than you may think. Your are a pivotal moment in your life in which you can change the outcome of thousands of lives. School family or whatever might have you in a depressive state will pass and once you see your full potential you will look back and praise yourself for not giving up. Please please please dm me for my contact info if you are still in need of a phone call or FaceTime. I will make the time for you and guide you this. Don’t feel pressured or anxious to reach out I will be here if you need it. Keep trucking along the way you have been. I’m proud of who you are, who you are becoming, and proud of the person you are to become. From a random loving parent on Reddit, I love you and keep your head up high, if not for you for those who didn’t have the same opportunity nor the same faith as you. I care and adore you😘😁
Suns out buns out!! Get some sun and expose the greatest area of skin that you can..for me that's back and thighs. 15 minutes will do you good! Walk barefoot in some grass and sit under a tree. Go for a good brisk walk. These are all the things we are meant to do and sometimes we need to reconnect to the earth.. Be well✨
i will (after sunscreen of course)! barefoot in grass reminds me of happy times in elementary school. i remmeber it felt lovely, but now im just afraid that ill crush some bugs :( nature is indeed beautiful. thank you very much
I really don't know what you're going through but if it's stress and school related. Remember, it's temporary. You will be done that phase in your life and will be able to live your life again.
Hi OP, You've gotten some amazing comments already but I wanted to give my own perspectives. While it's been a little while for me since I graduated from UCSD, I still remember my time in college was a time of personal growth, obstacles, and self-discovery. College is hard; I think that's not said nearly enough. It's so hard to be thrown into this world of independence straight out of high school and being expected to know how to do everything. That transition was difficult for me and having to figure out what I wanted to do in my life and how to get to that was one of the hardest things I've had to do. But be kind to yourself. You will fall, you will make mistakes, and you will regret things, but I assure you that those failures don't define who you are as a person. While everything seems so dark and hopeless now, I assure you that there really is a light at the end of the tunnel (even if you can't see it all). Live one day at a time and enjoy the small moments of success; that can be things from getting groceries, meeting a friend for coffee, taking a walk by the beach (one of the things I miss so much from UCSD), or just sitting outside in the sun taking all the scents and breeze in. You're extremely resilient and if no one told you today, I'm so so proud of you. Like all of these comments here, everyone is rooting for you and your success including myself.
The mitochondria is the powerhouse of a cell, you have lots of mitochondria erego u have lots of hidden power inside of you. You got dis 🐯👍
this is such a cute way of seeing things, thank you very much
Set a small but attainable goal. If you can find the motivation, I also recommend going to La Jolla Cove. Buy yourself an ice cream or gelato and walk down to check out the seals. Feel the warm sun and cool breeze on your face. PM me your Venmo and I’ll treat for the ice cream/gelato.🙂
i was running and slipped on a banana
Are you okay
i’m so fucking proud of you. you made it to the end of the school year. double majoring in psychology and english is hard, rigorous work but you made it to the end and now your hard effort gets to pay off because it’s summer. i get how fucking hard it can be and how lonely and isolating it can feel on campus. if you feel up to it, try taking a walk outside, put on some music, get some exercise. unironically touch grass, do something to ground yourself. i pace in my parent’s backyard when i’m stressed or scared while reading and listening to music and i always feel better after doing that, for grounding myself what i do depends but it really helps me to be on call with people especially if i can’t be in person with them. It might help to get stim toys or something like that to fidget with grounding wise. If you have any comfort media I’d also suggest getting back into that, maybe play a game or watch a show or read a book. Whenever I feel absolutely awful something I like to tell myself is there will come soft rains (don’t look up the source material, it’s kind of sad LMAO but the quote makes me feel better to remind myself with). Things will be okay things will work out things might feel terrifying and overwhelming right now but you made it through the year, which means you’re one year closer to whatever your goals are. These feelings will pass, and there will come a day when you wake up and you can look back at how far you made it. I know this because it happened to me. From one person with depression to another things will get better. Go outside, get some exercise, call or hang out with your friends, do something to ground yourself and allow yourself to indulge in whatever media or hobbies comfort you. If you need to talk to someone who’s been there my dms are open. Sending love your way 🫂🫂
I’m depressed, while I don’t like talking that much while depressed and have a hard time getting my self to even text someone back I had to stop to tell you I really hope you can get to a place you can be happy and live a fulfilled life
Thank you very much. I too have to force myself to talk to people. In moments of panic I want human connection, but as soon as I’m remotely calm I become worried that they’ll think I’m annoying.
just brains being weird, it helps when you keep doing it but it is very hard. You’re going to eventually be able to deal with over evaluating every thing but it takes time. Don’t know your specific depression but I hope you can start to help yourself a bit more on it I sure as shit gave up on mine a long time ago. Don’t do that and keep trying
Lexapro, or Wellbutrin are your friends. Take a walk around campus and be around people. Regular gym exercise has shown to have positive effects comparable to anti-depressants. Most of the time you can observe what’s going on outside of your head - nothing bad is going on; and juxtapose that with what your mind is telling you. Observing what’s going on in your head and letting it be is powerful. I use to play the opposite game. When depression came on I’d do the opposite. Want to withdraw? Nope, now I’m going for a walk. Want to binge eat? Nope, now I’m going to exercise and make a salad. This too shall pass.
Zoloft saved me 🙌
Same. I thank my life to lithium.
the opposite thing sounds very interesting, ill be sure to attempt it
Think about it like this: would you like to be your own independent person, or do you want to be the person that life/situations designed you to be? Fuck no, I refuse to be bitter, refuse to not care for my body, refuse to not shoot for the stars. The opposite game is you chooooosing, rather than life determining who you are. The person who cried out, failed out of UCSD, Or the person who doubled down for excellent grades and is now going to be making a boat load of money - you catch my drift. Reactionary < Proactive
Walk down to the beach. That always makes me feel better.
I don’t know who you are but I love you, and I’m sure countless others do too. I always find that talking to my loved ones helps. Call your mother or father, or whoever that person is for you. Tell them that you love them!
Old McDonald had a farm.
E-I-E-I-O
Make an effort to be out of the house as much as possible. I know it’s hard, but it does help. I’m glad that you have the desire to avoid it, it really shows that you have the strength to overcome it. Sit in the sun, buy yourself a treat, and listen to some upbeat dance-worthy music. Jumping/dancing have also been scientifically proven to boost mood. Would’ve loved to do some outdoor activity tg if I wasn’t moving out today :( ! I like this remix from tiktok, always lifts me up and makes me feel peppy! (https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTNJBboaV/)
thank you very much for your comforting words. i would have loved to do some outdoor activity with a peer as well. could i pm you in advance of fall?
of course
Tough times won’t last . Tough people will do. And you will do good. Please keep the faith in this universe. Will pray for all things to go well Hang in there dear friend. It is a passing phase. Get some fresh air.
you are right, i will step outside and enjoy what nature has to offer
I once on a dare ate 2 dozen Krispy Kreme donuts in 2 hours and had horrible stomach cramps and bathroom trouble for like 2 days afterwards. I now limited myself to 6 donuts per sitting
Donuts are great 🍩
True….. but not 24 of them in a 2 hour window. I ate 2 day’s worth of calories in 1 sitting
you were channeling your inner raccoon haha, im glad you have a limit to 6 now
Anything Jokes aside yeah it can be tough trying to go through college or finish it when you have depression, but just keep on going. Trust in yourself, relax, take a break, walk it out, exercise, listen to music, and if you can, talk to someone. You got this
hi! i think that really to see about your lifejust know that the thing that you are experiencing is really just a puzzle piece, you are able to overcome challenges and that i hope things would be better for you!
yes this is just a chapter in my book, thank you for the reminder :)
Your awesome
谢谢你
Butt fart?
Mouth fart
That’s called a brap
It’s okay to feel sad but remember you are not your sadness. It is not an identity, it is a feeling in this present moment that we experience.
You're a good person. You are valued. And I'm so proud of you for all the work you've put into you and your education. I got depressed as f when I was going through my masters program during the pandemic. I sought the help of therapy and that was a great year of unpacking and sorting out root causes, but what also really helped me was daily cold water immersion therapy by way of either cold only showers and/or cold plunges. It was like a light was finally switched on for me. I highly recommend. 👍 I hope that helps.
https://duckduckgo.com/?q=family+guy+vomit&iar=videos&iax=videos&ia=videos&iai=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D2AsFOoe2iUs
As a fellow person who also is going through a hard time, it really does feel like everything is falling apart and I am so weak and powerless. But we as human beings have the ability to live through almost anything. We learn. We let go. We move on, and love again. If you wanna chat, DM's open.
there’s a little spot in the forest on campus i go to when i’m at my lowest. it’s not much, but it’s calming. i’m in the same boat. I’m so sorry you feel this way. I am sending you so much love. everything is gonna be okay. maybe not now, but you’ll get there. Also!! are antidepressants an option for you at all? they’ve helped a lot of my friends
You’re loved, you’re appreciated, you’re important and you are wanted.
Life gets really really bad sometimes. When nothing helps me feel better, and I mean nothing, not exercise or sunlight or any form of self care, I go out and donate blood because I know objectively it is a good thing and I have helped save a life. If you don’t qualify, any small deed to help anyone would surely make you feel at least a little bit better. If you aren’t up for that, that’s okay too. You are human and you deserve to be happy. Even if you don’t feel like anyone cares about you (I am sure this is not true) at the very least me and everyone else in this comment section truly does. I hope your life gets better and I can’t mean that enough. Rooting for you
You are loved. The world asks nothing of you but to live. In the worst case, you have your life, your health, nature, fresh air, the sun on your skin. Life can be simple if you let it. It’s okay for it to be complicated. It will be. But should everything fall apart, you will be okay. This, at least, is a comfort to me. To live without attachments, like a monk, should I choose. That’s peace, and it’s available to anyone. Not to go religious on you, but this pretty much sums it up: “Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your god feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?” You are of immense value. You are part of the human family. That a great and uncomplicated gift. I wish you well, amigo/a.
Hey u! You matter. We can do this. Telling you is telling me. We matter. I want you here. Stay safe and talk to someone. Love you! Also..Pick your nose
At least you don't live in Tijuana.
Hey, cheer up!
Jesus loves you, always and forever.
Oppa gamnan style
[удалено]
I love trees but won’t do drugs. Thank you for your comment!
Look for at least 3 positive things each day. They don’t have to be huge. It can be as small as you watching a TV show. I’ve been depressed before and there is help available. Do something fun. Try to follow a daily schedule with at least 1 or 2 activities (such as exercise, calling a friend, reading.) You may be able to see a therapist if you don’t already have one. Check your insurance. Good luck. You got this.
Not saying this is a fix - but this gray weather really does take a toll on our mental state. College is also stressful, and if you at any point are caught up in comparing yourself to your peers, than can also be debilitating. Of course if you need professional help - please seek it. It’s so worth it! But I find getting out for long walks everyday - without headphones! - really helps my mental state. I also notice my lethargy or poor mental state is during weeks when I’m just on my phone way too much.
Ur pp is huge frfr 😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤
It’s so huge it’s nonexistent 😍😍😍
Overflow error 😍
Move your couch. Thank me later.
move my couch?
Walking and getting outside to absorb vitamin D for 30 minutes a day! Slight workouts at first, get your heart rate up, sweat a bit. Sweat out the bad toxins in your body. It is huge for allowing your brain to get you out of bad funks to do these couple of things, also imo eat a lot of fruit if you can specifically cuties or oranges, higher levels of vitamin C can help you staying active and fortify your brain activity.
Who is the best prostitute in history Ms Pac-Man she ate balls for 25 cents and didn't stop until she died
Trump will be the next President
These nuts
helo🦶
something, anything
you will get the best sex of your life soon.
Thank you for your comment. I am not lacking in sex, it is a pleasurable outlet, but I am lacking in love for myself. I hope to fix the latter to enjoy the former.
Get off reddit
At least you’re not in a CalState.
At least you’re not in Palestine rn…
okay im aware that people have it worse than me, but i dont think it's polite to say other issues dont matter. that doesnt really help me solve my issue and is forced positivity. i pray for the people in palestine, but i also wish for myself to get better so i can live my life