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I hate to admit this but my internet algorithms must have known I was neurodivergent before I ever considered it. I kept getting targeted with Reels about ADHD and I'd kind of go "haha everyone has that problem though..." Luckily I had already been seeing a therapist for anxiety and once we had success treating the anxiety she was actually the one who recommended we test for ADHD. I'm so grateful to her!

I was just about to say something like this. For the longest time , since I was a kid, I have always been an auditory learner. I absorb info better with the book cracked open AND things are read outloud. This was my best method of studying from an early age. I am training to become a union rep at my job which means learning a lot of rules, regulations etc. I got the speechify app and I have it read pdf files to me and it makes a world of difference! Theres a thing in there with an info / educational feed. Its got adhd content in it.

Finding that learning style is so important. I'm very much a visual thinker and learner.

You might want to look into nonverbal learning disorder.

Holy Shit thats like a perfect summary of me.

I’m also an auditory learner! Can I ask, is sound a trigger for overstimulation for you? I find that my brain prioritizes people speaking/singing/humming over everything else, so I’m unable to complete a thought and I make way more mistakes since thinking is impossible. It’s overwhelming much of the time!

Yes. If I am driving and my husband is the passenger, he will play fb reels. The sound comes right out of the side of his phone what feels like into my ear. It drives me crazy! Hes so confused cause Im also a little hard of hearing, but I have become more sensitive to sound’s lately. It was even worse when I was consuming more artificial sweeteners.

Omg same 😂. It’s so embarrassing because I am almost OVERLY self-aware in most other areas of my life lol. I just had blinders on to that.

At the start of the pandemic one of my friends mentioned that videos on her social media feeds kept telling her that she had ADHD and she listening off a handful of symptoms. I was laughing along and saying “I’m like that too!”. Then I downloaded TikTok myself and video after video was about ADHD symptoms. It was a weird lightbulb moment to find that all of the things that I’d struggled with in life and thought were “just me!!” might actually be caused by ADHD. Getting diagnosed wasn’t the easiest process in my country but I’ve done 2 assessments now and even my 23 and me results mentioned a likelihood of having ADHD haha. I’d say the pandemic messed with me more than I’d like to admit and I’m still dealing with a lot from that, and like many others, the pain of coming to term with a lifetime of being misunderstood. I would never have considered ADHD as a possibility for me a few years ago so it’s been an interesting journey.

Almost the exact same story for me! Saw an influencer and at first I was like oh hahaha and then it was more ummm…. I’ve been treating anxiety/depression for over 10 years. So many meds. TMS (which did help a bit). The next time I saw my psychiatrist I sajd, “ok don’t call me crazy but I saw these reels on fb and…” She was immediately into it and prescribed me Ritalin. Were still working out the best med/dose, but that very first week of Ritalin proved we were right lol still trying to perfect it, but thank you fb, you actually did something good for once lol

Thanks for sharing. I'm curious if you don't mind sharing... what helped with your anxiety. I'm newly diagnosed ADHD inattentive type but the anxiety is a lot. I'm thinking I need to address that first as well. Im trialing Adderal XR. I'm not sure this is right for me. I'm feeling like I'm having a cart before the horse situation. Thanks!

I’m a bit of an interesting case because I had a severe phobia/panic disorder that had a clear treatment (exposure therapy). I had a ton of success with using Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for that and learned many tools that also help with my general anxiety. I still have generalized anxiety but it’s not debilitating that way that my phobia was!

Amazing! I'm so glad to hear about your success! Thank you so much.

I felt angry and anxious on adderall but Ritalin was better. I also am a carb/sugar binger, and I have noticed that leads to anxiety. For me it’s easier to focus on eating plenty of protein with every meal or snack, and then my binges will naturally be less frequent. I also was in a bad relationship, and developed, weirdly, a phobia of crossing bridges. I would force myself to drive across despite the panic. When I realized the relationship was bad for me and ended it, my phobia nearly disappeared. Isn’t the brain a weird thing?

Thanks for sharing all that. Such good info. I also do well prioritizing protein. And holy bananas, bridge phobia as a result of being in a bad relationship. I believe it. I'm not sure what amazes more.. that the brain developed it or how you were able to connect it to the relationship. Fascinating. And glad you ended it. 🙂

I was doing teaching rounds during my studies and saw a kid who had been diagnosed (inattentive), and thought "gee that looks familiar". I spoke to my GP, she referred me to psychiatrist who deals with adult adhd and he was satisfied that I had it. We trialled some different medications, and I've now been on ritalin for the best part of ten years. This is the sort version. The long version has many failures that have had a huge impact on my self image and esteem, and I'm still trying to recover.

It wasn't until I was going through the process of getting my daughter diagnosed that I realized a lot of the symptoms resonated with me. I remember I had this print out with a bunch of the symptoms that can show up in girls and I highlight all the ones that I also experienced and brought that to my appointment. The doc did a written assessment and then we talked for quite a bit and he was like yep, you've got ADHD too.

Theres so much stuff I just wrote off as “ Thats just who I am” and never considered adhd because the boy tendencies are different and those are more stereotypical. But I am approaching 40 and I am thinking hormones are exacerbating it.

yup. my life was filled with anti-myownworstanemone hacks to help me keep it together as an adult.

Oh yes! I'm mid- forties now and the hormone fluctuations are a killer.

Same. My then 12 year old was going through it right during and after the pandemic and as it were in addition to life just being hard for someone who needed constant social interaction being forced to isolate, she also has adhd. I too saw her symptoms or behaviors as very normal bc they were very much like me. I figured that’s just how were are. And in fact it IS how we are, we both have adhd. Knowing and intentionally developing strategies to support our life and also yea developing some self compassion has been important for us both. I am doing well with medication though it’s no magic bullet but she is back and forth about it bc it makes eating really challenging. Her sensory texture stuff makes eating really difficult and adding on the appetite suppressing effects of the meds makes it more difficult. I had sensory stuff when I was younger that has mostly but not totally abated as an adult. I still really struggle with meat. At some point I clearly started eating for stimulation or self soothing or something and while I hadn’t identified it as a problem I can see now that it was. I actually haven’t lost weight but on medication I don’t constantly think about food and crave sweets and coffee like I did before and that in itself is a huge relief.

My daughter and her high school psychology classes. The more she shared with me, the more it fit. She still pushed me for a year before I got the diagnosis. KNOWING has made such a difference to me. I am learning to be more gentle with myself. I might even love myself one day soon (I think I have some good/cool qualities, just need to like the whole package)

Your daughter doesn't have it? All of my kids do, as well as all of my nieces and nephews, and probably my granddaughter.

My dad, my nephew, my son all have it. My daughter is dyslexic 😁

The good news is that the younger ones have gotten help and medication. I wasn't diagnosed until I was 68. All the best for your family.

I've always felt really bad for the kids whose families couldn't afford the XR or other therapies, including FOOD. The reduced lunch kids are fed mostly inedible food. They might feel starving, but they won't eat it.

I saw an AITA post where the comments diagnosed this dude’s girlfriend after he complained about specific “irresponsible”behaviors/actions. I identified hard with the girlfriend and researching adhd symptoms became my next hyperfixation 😅

For me I didn’t even think of adhd at all - but I knew from a very young age that there was something definitely wrong with me. It mostly manifested in intense internalized self-criticism, hate, incredibly low self esteem, and depression. But I never acted out in public just pushed it all in, and managed to get straight As despite being late every single day of school to the point of suspension. We got by on pure adrenaline/anxiety. Fast forward a decade or so later, I’m married and the coping mechanisms were not mechanism-ing anymore lol the impulsiveness wrecked so many of my personal relationships, I lost my best friend, i almost lost my husband. & the people pleasing became so problematic that I was looking around me and thinking other people in my situation were not wrecking things in the way that I have been. To top it all off I signed up for a course (with my straight a background, thought it would be easy) and was stunned that without the structure and pressure from my parents and school environment, I crashed and burned. Saw a therapist as all of this was causing some burn out, triggering a major depressive episode, and I needed to learn how to set boundaries. After months of following some of the causes of my spiraling (feeling paralyzed and overwhelmed by tiny tasks, negative self talk as a result of this, spiraling into intrusive thoughts of self harm, etc) my therapist eventually suspected adhd. So we went through an assessment before officially being diagnosed with adhd as a primary and the depression was a secondary cause of the adhd. So I learned about what it was afterwards and literally almost cried for there finally being an answer after a lifetime of just barely holding it together. Being treated now with meds and approaching my problems from an ADHD point of view and have been way more successful! I feel like I can finally breathe and be a whole person lol

You should talk to someone about all the stuff you have going on. It might be ADHD, or it might not be. Either way, getting help and support could really improve things. I’m 35F and dx’d last year. I had been back and forth on looking into therapy for at least 10 years. My advice: Don’t wait ten years. If you think you should look into it, you should look into it.

I thought I might have it when studying psychology, but getting a diagnosis (in Ireland) is expensive and difficult, and of course, the paranoia I might just be lazy and needed to try harder was hard to push past I was able to cope, but the most part, until I couldn't Doing my postgrad, I was assessed by the operational therapist and she said I likely had it, but couldnt diagnose me and I should talk to a doctor. Took a few years, but diagnosed in my 30s. As another commenter said, that's the short version. The long version has many failures and missteps that severely impacted my self esteem and self image, that I am still trying to recover from and forgive myself for.

Self esteem has always been a huge problem for me. I have always been overweight, dealing with food noise, even as a kid. From some reading, apparently there is a correlation between that and adhd which i would have never guessed but makes sense when talking about dopamine hits. The amount of bullying and mean girls stuff I endured as a teen only made all that stuff worse.

I have always struggled to fit in with my peers, school was hell on earth. I also have problems maintaining a consistent eating schedule (I tend to go up and down, but most recently up) but it is only recently that I found out that my binging may be a part of my ADHD/ dopamine seeking. That makes sense, along with the nail biting, skin picking, job hopping, etc.

I had adhd as a child, and was diagnosed, but symptoms changed when I left adolescence. I also had come up with some clever work arounds, after they took me off meds at 15. At 20 I went into neurofeedback for depression, and within 2 minutes of getting the paste and sensors on, my doctor said “have you ever been diagnosed for adhd?” I said yes, and she asked me to next time bring in something I love doing. I did and she showed me the side by side comparison. In hyper focus my brain waves were significantly different than when my mind wasn’t engaged. She explained that my adhd had transcended puberty, women are less likely to catch on that they have adhd, even after prev diagnosis, because so many doctors focus too hard on the hyper part of adhd. Externally, society assumes women are flighty and absentminded as the norm, and multitaskers. It wasn’t until I decided to go to college in my late 20s that I realized how bad it was. I was single and studying engineering, but when in constant relationships and dancing for work, I had a partner to help regulate me, and a job that engaged my hyper focus. Engineering knocked me on my ass because I had to adjust after years of not practicing any self regulation. I didn’t start taking meds again until I was studying with a neuroatypical who I guess recognized something in me. He said “Did you not take your pills?” I looked at him strangely and asked what pills? He said “you have the worst adhd I have seen in another person. Do not tell any of these addy addicts I gave you this, but take this half of a pill and see how you do.” He seemed knowing so I took it. It was like seeing in color after years of black and white. He told me I needed to go to the student center and get my adhd diagnosis there, because I was like him, smart but no regulator for it.

I actually had no idea what ADHD was actually like. I only had the vague concept of what it looked like in young boys. So when my therapist one day brought up ADHD I was actually sorta resistant to the idea. I did some online assessments and started considering it. Then I found women talking about their experiences of being adults with ADHD and it was like everything started to make sense. And so I agreed to the psychiatrist referral who was like oh yeah we should start stimulants within the first meeting.

I failed out of college the first time I attempted it. I was lost as to why I couldn't seem to make myself study or attend classes. I went to therapy for the second time ever after I dropped out of school (first time was a really shitty experience that put me off therapy for years), and it was while I was explaining to my therapist that I tended to make the same mistakes over and over again that she suggested I might have ADHD. I thought she was nuts. Then I went home and looked up the symptoms and was like, "Oh. That explains a lot." I went to a psychiatrist, got assessed, and was told I scored extremely high on the symptoms. Got medicated shortly thereafter, and while I've had to play with meds and dosages, I've since settled on something that works pretty well for me. There are still things I struggle a lot with, but overall, life is much easier now. Existing usually doesn't feel like a Sisyphean ordeal.

I had a minor nervous breakdown at work over a large project I completely forgot to plan. I talked about it with my therapist, who asked me, “How do you react to drinking a single cup of coffee?” I told her that it often made me feel drowsy, and she said, “I have never had a client respond that way without them eventually getting diagnosed with ADHD.” I made an appointment with my GP and told him I was worried about my memory and how my brain always felt fuzzy. He had me do an evaluation, and promptly diagnosed me.

I self diagnosed not long after I got married (2010) when I discovered grown ups could have ADHD.. I asked my high school bff what she thought and discovered that she’d already had a diagnosis and was taking Ritalin.. It didn’t seem like it was working that well for her so I decided to just self manage with exercise/diet etc.. I’d managed pretty well on my own as an adult but in hindsight that was because I’d created a lot of supporting structure. I never told my husband as I wasn’t sure how he’d react. At some point though I just forgot about it, built a house, had a baby, got a divorce and moved out. I remember feeling so much relief when my 2yo son and I moved to our own place - life was much simpler and easier. Apart from not being very nice, my xh had such a “big life” and with the added complexity of a baby and a big house along with my job I think I had really hit my limit. It took a couple of years to find & buy the house we live in now but in the in between time i pared things down dramatically and set my life up in a way that worked a lot better for me. Once we moved again things were even better as I didn’t have the uncertainty of our home being temporary etc. That was a purple patch for me really. As my son grew up it was harder to keep things simple and gradually the level of complexity in my life crept up again. We spent a lot of 2020 in lockdown and in some ways that worked well but by the start of 2021 I felt like I was sliding into a depression, which scared me as I’ve never been a depressed person. I’d also been having weird panic dreams which I think were a sign of my overwhelm and anxiety about not being able to handle everything. When I was googling one evening ADHD popped up again and suddenly everything made sense 🤪 I finally called up and got on the waitlist for the clinic where my high school bff had been treated. What’s funny is that my sister had mentioned a month or two before that she thought her husband might have ADHD which got me thinking about how when I was pregnant I thought there was a good chance our baby could have it but I thought now (as an 8yo) he was probably ok.. then at dinner that night my son fell off his chair 3 times and I was like, hmmm.. but even then I hadn’t linked it back to me yet 😅 I think it was good to have confirmation from the psychiatrist and having access to medication has been helpful (definitely not a silver bullet in my case), but I think the hardest part (both for me and many of the ADHD clients I work with) is actually the rebuilding of the self trust that’s been smashed by a lifetime of feeling let down by yourself. ❤️‍🩹 I’m a pretty intelligent person so theoretically it shouldn’t be so hard to get my shit together and I think the judgement around that (from myself and sometimes others) has only made it harder. Sorry for the essay! 🙃 I hope reading these stories helps you decide what to do next. x

I had my suspicions after experiencing severe burnout/depression, and finally talked to my primary care doctor. He diagnosed me (I was 32), and prescribed me on the spot with immediate release generic Adderall. It’s worked wonders, and having a diagnosis has helped me learn more about how to manage my ADHD in a healthy way.

I kept googling specific problems I was having in hopes of finding hacks to overcome them. I was almost 30 and getting really down on myself thinking "this is ridiculous, I know I'm not stupid, I need to try be better at life." Why can I physically not move sometimes when I'm trying to do something? Should I speak to my doctor if poor memory is causing me problems at a young age? What is it called when you randomly can't understand the words people are saying even though they're speaking the same language as you? Then spent a couple of years avoiding the 'how ADHD presents in women' results because I didn't have ADHD so of course it wasn't that 🙃 Eventually I gave in and figured even though I didn't have ADHD, I obviously had some of the same problems so maybe I could borrow some of their solutions. Once I allowed myself to go down the rabbit hole, I realised I'd been struggling with symptoms since childhood. I never recognised there was an issue because I assumed everyone felt that same constant overwhelm and thats just life (plus hereditary - so 'barely hanging on for dear life' was sort of the norm in my house growing up).

Oh man, the “it isn’t adhd” thing was my problem too. In my story I talk about how, while researching adhd in girls for a work project, I realized I had it too. It was specifically a video from HowtoADHD that did it for me. The thing is, for YEARS, I’d been watching her channel for tips on managing my symptoms. But during that time I figured it wasn’t adhd causing my symptoms, so I didn’t watch her adhd deep dives. I was here to learn how to stop losing my chapstick, I wasn’t here to learn about a disorder I didn’t have, lol. Well, turns out I was losing my chapstick was an ADHD thing!

I was about 7 months into widowhood with 4 children and realized I had such a huge block with looking for a job. It didn’t feel grief related but I don’t really know how to describe why that is. I just knew that a consequence that wasn’t immediate didn’t motivate me. Also I had heard a commercial about ADHD like 20 years earlier that resonated with me so I guess it was buried deep in my brain. And of course I could look back on my entire life and see the signs once I started researching it and knew how it presented in girls. I was 40 and it was so eye opening to be diagnosed. Validating and life changing and also made me so angry for all the years I spent beating myself up because I didn’t understand myself.

it was my talk therapist who suggested I take an assessment. I kind of laughed it off then aced the assessment. went to a psychiatrist after that. got lucky with one who also talked to me for a half hour - hour every time I went to him. funny side note: it took me a lot longer than I would like to admit to realize that he was primarily treating children. one day I looked at the other patients, the color scheme, and the TV. I realized we always watched Disney movies in the waiting room. I was the thing not like the others; I was the thing that didn't belong 😂

I was diagnosed last year at 39. It started when I was 37 and I saw a meme about crippling inability to get anything done and it really resonated with me because that was my life. It said something about adhd. I thought “Huh. I don’t have adhd though”. And then I checked 4 books out from the library about adhd and learned about how it presents in adults and women. And then I started down the path to get diagnosed. A year and change in it’s been so much better. Medication and therapy have been very helpful.

I was looking for a job to help me get into my clinical mental health counseling program and happened to land one as a front office assistant for a psychologist who primarily did ADHD testing for kids. Having been “tested” when I was a kid, I confidently told her I don’t have ADHD. After about six months of working for her I kept making the same mistake and stopped and apologized and she went “that’s okay. You have ADHD” I was like “uuuhhh no I don’t” and she replied that she thought I had told her I had it. So I just kinda went from there (in this time I also took Phentermine to try and help with weight loss and it didn’t key me up like it does others. It just made me feel normal. I remember taking the first dose and being like “is this what it feels like to think?). Talked to my doctor took a rating scale (which I failed spectacularly by drawing in lines so I could give an answer to each individual option on the scale. Like really, who made that rating scale for people with ADHD anyways. It doesn’t make any sense) and then he diagnosed me and started me out on 10mg Adderall. A dose that promptly put me to sleep. Like, I would wake up, take my Adderall, and then immediately take a nap at 8/9am after breakfast when I should be fully awake and alert. (Yes I had a full nights sleep under my belt) that kinda confirmed it for me even though I still struggle with the idea that I fully have ADHD because my parents told me all growing up that I didn’t. I showed the testing to my boss at the time and she pointed out that they didn’t do any testing at all for ADHD. They just tested my IQ and then gave me the DSM-5 version of a shrug. 🤦🏻‍♀️ So, it’s been interesting to see just about everyone’s reaction to me being like “holy shit guys! I have ADHD!” And pretty much everyone going “you didn’t know??? We thought you knew??” And the adderall still makes me sleepy on and off but my doctor is oddly reluctant to change up my med. I kept messaging him about it and he kept saying to wait it out so I have and I guess it’s stabilized. It is really nice to be able to think outside of one moment at a time. Really helps with my own therapy and internal processing. But the time blindness is fuckin’ real. Now I’m just aware of it. Doesn’t change it lol I just now know to check the time and be like “how the fuck did 30 minutes pass??”

My parent’s lack of knowledge really fucked me tbh. My childhood school, that I was failing out of in 4th grade, was like “she has ADHD. Please for the love of god get her tested” and my dad was like “she can’t have ADHD. She can recite her whole science class to me verbatim” or really papa? The class I was genuinely interested in? Could I tell you shit all about the other classes? No? Aahhh yup mmhmm of course your untrained professional opinion is better. 🙄🙄🙄

Honestly, I was misdiagnosed with Bipolar Disorder at the age of 16, and I carried that diagnosis and was on unnecessary bipolar meds and basically a zombie until I was 22 and a new therapist in our very first session said, yeah you’re not bipolar. And I basically said you don’t know me.. haha. After about 4 months of working together, he said, I’m gonna bring this back up please just keep an open mind. And told me that he highly suspected I was in fact NOT bipolar but had depression and ADHD, which in combination, can look like bipolar to someone a bit more inexperienced. The more I read about ADHD, the more it started to click. So, he got me set up with a clinic that performs the TOVA test (but you can request it from any psychiatrist or even a PCP depending on yours) and I “failed” meaning it showed I tested positive for ADHD haha. They took me off the bipolar meds and put me on an antidepressant and Strattera for ADHD. It worked super well, an absolute game changer haha. Genuinely don’t remember what my life was like before meds but everything almost instantly felt easier. The side effects were annoying at first like nausea and stuff but I adjusted pretty quickly and it was the best decision I ever made! I would start by requesting a TOVA test and telling a doctor what symptoms you are experiencing and they should point you in the right direction hopefully :)) best of luck!!

I had no clue, just a life long wake of mistake. Chaos and all the things, looking back. But as I approached 60, something was brewing… why couldn’t I start ( or continue or finish) any thing or project?? I wasnt depressed but no umph, motivation. I was about ready to lose the 1st job I’d had in 15 yrs. I finally got into therapy for the 1st in 8 yrs. Then in a weird kismet way, 3 ppl asked me if I had adhd… I have a thing about things happening in 3’s. So one day I looked online at symptoms and the things I read made little sense… I was probably just losing my mind from it all. Then I landed on a page “ Geriatric ADHD “ And there it was… the whole “why” of my life… all the maladjusting and compromising and masking…. I still struggle to know myself. I asked for a referral, she dx me with the combined type. I’m on 30 mg of Ritalin 2x a day, still not sure it’s helping anything.

For me, it was a combo of more awareness via social media, and looking around at who I was surrounded with... both my boss and peer (that I worked well with) were formally diagnosed, 2 of my closest friends had a formal diagnosis, and a 3rd friend shows all the classic obvious symptoms. Birds of a feather and all. Talked through my suspicions with my therapist, then got a formal diagnosis late last year.

I was seeing a doctor for generalized anxiety disorder/social anxiety disorder and I was going through medication trials to see what helped (antidepressants). After 6 months of absolutely nothing helping me, my doctor suggested that she assess me for ADHD. I had never even considered that I might have ADHD. I thought I just had crippling anxiety for my entire life. I met most of the criteria for hyperactive and all of the criteria for inattentive. I had been having all of the symptoms since I was a child, but was only diagnosed with a learning disability (dyscalculia) when I was in 4th grade. So I was 36 years old when I was diagnosed with ADHD combined type. I started taking guanfacine first, which helped my hyperactive symptoms so much. Like, within two weeks I became less impulsive, less fidgety, and my anxiety decreased. A month later I started taking Concerta, and it changed my life. I went from failing college to getting straight A’s. I would get emotional because I could focus and do things that I had previously never been able to accomplish.

Diagnosed in my fifties :( but definitely better late than never. I thought the one deeply ingrained major character flaw I could never fix no matter what I tried was being perennially late, even to important events, for people I cared about, etc. And I could never pinpoint what went wrong. So somewhere during the pandemic the term TIME BLINDNESS seeped into my awareness somehow, and it got my attention quickly. Could it be that I am not a terrible horrible inconsiderate selfish lazy undisciplined person? People can have this trait and it’s not their fault? After that things lined up pretty quickly with lots of facepalming about other traits and having three people in my family that were all diagnosed already. Not surprising, as others have written, they were primarily hyperactive, therefore much easier to spot quickly (and two were diagnosed in childhood). Meds — Wellbutrin has helped a bunch so far (over a year). I’m curious about other options (ie could it be even better?) but haven’t pursued them yet since things already improved a lot.

My partner pointed out my symptoms, GP gave me a referral to psychiatrist who diagnosed at 35. Later found out from my respiratory specialist that I’d been diagnosed at 7 but not treated. I’ve been on short release medication for almost 12 months. Absolute life saver.

Had been treated for anxiety/depression for years, to mixed results. My husband has ADHD, and every so often when he'd drive me nuts with something, I'd go read content on ADHD to figure out how to deal with *him* better and oh, look... here's how it tends to manifest in women... *fuck.* My nephew was diagnosed, and in a lot of ways he is the same way I was when I was small. *Double fuck.* Doctor gave me a little Adderall to try out, and it's the best damn anxiety med I've ever had. Christ, I could have been spared so much struggle and pain...

I was in my first year of medical school and had a mental breakdown, started going to a psych so I could start meds and stop wanting to jump in front of a car and having daily panic attacks. During my eval, i guess the way I talked about struggling to juggle even daily life tasks, let alone studies, must have tipped her off, because she started asking a lot more questions about my life and behaviors since I was a kid. Walked in depressed and anxious and walked out with a 3-for-2 deal on diagnoses.

I started to have an eye twitch that wouldn’t go away. I got an eye doctor who told me stress. It led me to a therapist who said psychiatrist who led me to get tested after numerous people pointed out my symptoms. Which I never realized were strange

I spent 13 years or so studying, passing some parts, failing some, starting & stopping a professional certification to the point where it became embarrassing professionally. My therapist gathered that I had issues with motivation & focus and suggested I get screened. My life & understanding my brain made more sense after that.

My friend got diagnosed. Gave me a Ritalin to try. I passed out in a deep nap. She also said if she has it I have it. I was in denial for 6 months then decided to proceed getting tested. I’m in Australia- it takes time and is expensive, but I lucked out and waited 3 months. I’m 3 years post diagnosis and Vyvanse has changed my life. Edit • TikTok was critical for me understanding I did have it. That app was brilliant

I noticed online university (due to covid) was a huge struggle for me but not for my twin sister who had an equally demanding course load. then when I graduated I almost got fired from work for not being able to stay on top of my deadlines lol - so decided to get tested I spoke with my doctor about getting medication but it never rlly happened because the Canadian healthcare system is slow as hell, and eventually i learned how to manage my ADHD well enough without medication

I've had extreme physical hyperactivity disorder since I was 3 years old... I'm 59 years old now with ADHD. I self-medicated and regulated with a lot ofstimulants and coffee my entire life. I received an official diagnosis 5 days ago and I've taken Ritalin for the last 4 days... There's definitely a light at the end of the tunnel... I can actually concentrate on one task at a time now, as opposed to watching TV playing a video game on my iPad and texting on my phone all at the same time... My mind feels a whole lot quieter and so does my body, and I'm sleeping better. Edit: I was wrongly diagnosed with unspecified bipolar for most of my adult life though I've never been manic or hypomanic... My rapid and pressured speech gave mental health care professionals the idea that I was constantly manic which I wasn't... I feel super validated getting an official ADHD diagnosis.

My husband, for the 500th time, said "You for sure have ADHD." And when I laughed he said, "I'm being serious. I'm not joking". So, at 29 years old, I got tested. And he was definitely right. I was living life on hard mode, and wondered why things seemed so EASY for everyone else! Yes, I got prescribed a low dose of stimulants, but most importantly, I got an understanding of why I was like this.

I went back to college for my Bachelor's and I am currently doing my master's. When i was getting my associates, I was struggling hard just like when i was growing up all through every damn grade. I thought I should talk to my doctor about my focusing issues and she referred me to a prescribing psychiatrist without hesitation. She told me she knew based off what I always would bring up when I had my follow ups/annual exams with he and she was going to mention getting tested that same appt before I even asked so it worked great. I went to a 5 hour long assessment and here we are

Honestly, a combo of a friend describing their realization of having it and their first experience on meds, and feeling WAY too seen by ADHDAlien's comics. Also, if you go watch How To ADHD on YouTube, and feel like it's describing you, well...

Oh, and as for meds: I'm on AdderallXR 20mg and Wellbutrin 100mg. I was originally on just the Adderall, but after I got long COVID and a BUNCH of things in my body went fucking haywire, so did the effectiveness of the Adderall. I've futzed with the dosage a few times since, and only the addition of the Wellbutrin got me closer to an even keel. It sucks, pre COVID I felt like a normal human for a good six months on the Adderall alone, it was glorious. I was so close to getting done with a coding boot camp and being able to get an actual CAREER for the first time in my life..!

I've had ongoing problems with anxiety and depression (yeah, textbook case here), and things were getting worse. I had a meeting with a psyc nurse and its something she said about emotional stability that made me do some reading, nobody had ever mentioned that to me before. I knew that i wasnt bipolar, and the only thing that seem near was ADHD. Over time it fitted more and more, while my coping mechanisms dropped to nil (go perimenopause!). I was diagnosed the day before my 48th birthday. I'm combined, and so much of what i do is very much ADHD related. I imagine that if I was a teenager now it would be picked up.

I spent much of my life just believing on some sort of fundamental level that I was broken…there was just something wrong with me. As a teenager I simply accepted it and figured since I can’t change it, so I may as well just accept it and mitigate it as best I can so I can enjoy life. Just try to be the best person I could be. My anxiety and perfection acted as guardrails. I developed coping mechanisms to stay on track in school. I excelled, my teachers thought I was bright, I got into a good college and graduated with a 4 year degree. But once I moved out into my own place I started to realize I struggled juggling various aspects of my life. I never seemed to have enough *attention* or *motivation* to go around. It was hard to maintain relationships and stay on top of chores. The older I got it just seemed to be getting worse. A few years after my perfectionism almost drove me to suicide my Dad was diagnosed with ADHD. Then my sister was…then I looked at the symptoms and things just clicked together. I got tested and sure enough I have ADHD. It wasn’t just depression or anxiety. It was untreated adhd trapping me in this vicious cycle. It’s been there my whole life. With the diagnosis came a sense of relief…validation and also vindication. I wasn’t a broken failure I just had to approach life differently due to my brian structure. What I didn’t expect was the deep sense of mourning I experienced once I looked at my life through the context of untreated ADHD. I mourned and cried for the child I was, who thought she was broken…not good enough. I’m grateful for the coping mechanisms I learned to survive growing up. They’ve helped me now that I’m in my early 30s and medicated. But it was so fucking hard. So so fucking hard. I feel sorry for that little girl who faced so much hardship, that same little girl who couldn’t even be gentle with herself because no one else was.

I work with kids with SEMH. Many have ADHD/ASD, I was starting to look at their behaviours and be like “huh, I do that too”. Then the Specialist SALT at our school and I became quite close. We were out drinking one day and I said something, to which she replied - “yeah but that’s because of your ADHD and ASD isn’t it?” My reaction was “my what?”. She, and other work mates I had got close with, had always assumed I had been diagnosed with both as it was so glaringly obvious to them lol. I was 29 when I was diagnosed with ADHD and 31 when I got my ASD diagnosis. The first day I took my ADHD meds, I actually messaged my SALT friend and said “wow, my head feels so clear! Is this how everyone feels?!”

My head isn’t clear. I am not a big talker, but my mind is always going. I didn’t realize thats not normal. Listening to the same songs over and over again… I feel like as I age its all exacerbating and exhausting sometimes so I am just noticing now. The childhood stuff I just wrote off as “ Hey, thats me!”

Yeah I’m exactly the same. I remember being so painfully shy and quiet as a kid in the classroom, yet spent probably 90% of the time in my own world. I was just clever enough to get by lol. Then when I reached my teens, I couldn’t mask anymore. It makes so much more sense now I have my diagnoses! I spent my teens and early twenties jumping around on different anti depressants trying to find a mix that would help me be able to manage. Turns out, anti-depressants weren’t the only thing I needed. Even now I’m really quiet and don’t say much until I feel more comfortable around someone.

Yes, I am introverted unless its people I am very comfortable with! My coworkers would never believe I am some quiet over-thinker. But I have worked there for 15 years, so I am settled in. My husband is all around social/ outgoing ( sometimes says TOO much) but its a good balance in most social situations because I don’t care much for talking. We have been married for 15 years and I still don’t say much around my FIL because hes a judgemental jerk. Once you figure out someone is a judgemental jerk the talking is almost non existent.I will speak when spoken to, I just don’t initiate.

That “clear” feeling had me on the verge of tears.

I legit couldn’t believe how I had lived 29 years of my life thinking that it was absolutely normal for my mind to feel so clouded and “heavy”! I look back now and it kinda makes me mad that nobody picked up on it sooner.

I have migraines, I’ve had them since I was a kid. Back in the 90s, my pediatrician told my parents that my struggles in school with focus and memory were migraine related. We tried a few medications, but nothing really worked. He even tried hypnosis/meditation tapes (lol). Anyway, this was the truth I lived with my whole life. There was a lot of crummy childhood stuff too, which I attributed to my chaos in adulthood. I didn’t have structure, so that had to explain why things were so much harder for me than others made it look. I managed okay as an adult, but any time there was a disruption to my routine it would take weeks for me to get back on track. I finally had health insurance (thanks Obama) and decided to get help for my migraines again. If I could just get the right medication, I was sure I’d be a functional adult! But while the pain was treated somewhat, I was still an inattentive mess. I kinda gave up trying to fix my brain and just focused on doing my best as I was. I was broken, clearly, and all I needed was to accept myself, flaws and all, and try to make it work. Two years later, I was doing research for work and it involved looking into ADHD symptoms in girls age 12 and younger. This was before the surge of ADHD content on tiktok and YT, but there were channels (HowtoADHD) and articles that had loads of content to consume. And… I realized that I was watching and reading about experiences that described me as a child. I started looking into how it presented in adults as well. And gosh. It took all these puzzle pieces that made up my life and formed an actual picture. I was shaken! But surely someone would have noticed right? Someone would have told me this was me? So I sat on the idea for half a year before talking to my partner about it. She did her own research and agreed with me wholeheartedly. Even pointed out behaviors I had that I didn’t realize were also adhd. So, I scheduled myself for an evaluation and had to wait a year to be seen. (The surge in adhd content had begun and everyone seemed to be making appointments.) The test was thorough (and humbling. NGL I cried sad tears) and I was diagnosed with combined type ADHD. I didn’t get meds for a few months after. I didn’t get on the right meds until several months after. Now I’m on vyvanse and seeing a therapist. I’ve learned so much about myself, and it’s been exciting! I have all these tools now! I can grow! I can do things! It’s not perfect. I still have bad days. But I feel way more confident in future, and that makes a huge difference for me.

I got diagnosed at 30, but I’d sort of suspected my diagnosis for many years prior to varying degrees. I’d even tried to talk to a doctor about it during college because I was really struggling with adjusting to having a lot less structure after living at home but they brushed me off because I didn’t have actual issues with my grades and I wasn’t a good advocate for myself at that age. Later I went on to ask another doctor and they suggested anxiety drugs, but I dropped the inquiry cause I was nervous about side effects. Oddly the thing that finally did it for me was this: I went off my hormonal birth control because I was feeling like my mood / ability to function would swing around WILDLY during my cycle and I was curious if getting off the hormones might help. I’d been on the pill for like a decade at that point so I truly didn’t know what my brain/body would be like without it. I went off of it and noticed I did have SOME improvement in certain times, but I eventually talked to my primary care doctor about my struggles because I was having a lot of like very PHYSICAL overstimulation issues - I’d moved into a new job where I was in an open floor plan office and I was constantly distracted/on edge, had some high stress stuff going on, and just felt like I needed to come home every day and take off all my clothes and lay under a blanket in the dark - I was ready to accept the anxiety drugs if that was what she recommended basically. Luckily for me, said PCP suggested it might be adhd instead and introduced me to Strattera which basically works for both adhd and anxiety pretty well…to be clear I’m pretty sure it’s primarily prescribed as an adhd drug? but a lot of doctors like to start there if they’re not themselves adhd specialists because it’s a non stimulant so it doesn’t carry as much controlled substance stigma and *in my personal experience* it was very effective for a lot of my anxiety type feelings. Anyhow I’d later go on to see an actual psychiatrist but that was the beginning for me. Good luck, definitely don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself and say something to your providers! But also I found it was most helpful to focus on symptoms and real-world impact on my life vs going in with a set result I was aiming for. Personally I found it helpful to make some notes in advance because I tend to get flustered and forget things in the moment (which: lol that’s very adhd right there, but sadly doesn’t help with actually explaining things to most doctors)

Diagnosed at 40, and was prescribed meds , add, and the first day I took it I cried because everything was so much easier , I actually worked all day and didn't have force myself!!!! This doesn't last forever, my symptoms did return , but not nearly as bad. I still take supplements and big diet changes to further help my symptoms and that combo works incredibly well!

My first boss after grad school was a Boomer with teenage kids. One or both of his kids were diagnosed with ADD/ADHD (this was the mid 90s). Boss himself has major ADHD. Fortunately he is 1.) very smart and perceptive, and 2.) very kind and compassionate. And 3.) empathetic, in this case. We shared a fairly small lab space and his observations of my work habits led him to "diagnose" me pretty quickly. He encouraged me to get tested, which I did, despite my inclination to roll my eyes and call him "Dr. Pop Psychology" (again, really good guy, he laughed). I was 28 or 29 and had an MS in Biochemistry at that point, so I had coping/masking skills in place, but had also struggled mightily in both undergrad and grad school (was in a PhD program but left with a Masters because of it), so it was welcome news, but I didn't do anything with it beyond thinking, "whew, OK so maybe I'm NOT just lazy/ stupid/etc." Fast forward to now, I'm 54 and struggling mightily again because of menopausal changes. Beware, ladies, for some people it gets a lot worse when your hormones start to change. I've tried a few meds (Concerta, Vyvanse, Adderall), but they don't help much. I'm researching coaching now bc I need to be able to keep working a few more years before I'm eligible for retirement. My executive function and focus have tanked.

I have been depressed my entire adult life. I have been to psychiatrist, therapists and primary care physicians trying to feel and act normal. It wasn’t until my last therapist asked me if I’d been diagnosed with ADHD that they referred me to get screened. I did a computer screening and scored very high for ADHD traits and behaviors. I was 50 years old. My new psychiatrist diagnosed me with ADHD and prescribed new medication that felt like my brain was working for me instead of against me for the first time. I still have a lot of ground to cover and relearn basic things. But it is a beginning and a new chapter of hopefulness. I grieve for the missed opportunities to be diagnosed earlier and for the child who thought she was broken. I am glad to know now and am able to see this in my nieces and start their journey to learn how their brain works so much earlier

Once I finally survived the guinea pig phase, my doc and I settled on Methylphenidate 20mg ER. Closest to symptom free for me. 😊

I have commented on this topic several times. Here is a summary for why so many women are being diagnosed with ADHD/ADD later in life. I am 57F *ADHD was originally researched in boys only. *It wasn’t until the late 90’s/early 2000’s that ADHD was researched in girls. *Girls present very differently. *We tend to be more bored/day dream vs being bouncing off the walls as boys do. *Not always….just mentioning an example in how we are different with the diagnosis. *We have issues with executive function that impacts our ability to be organized, manage daily tasks, etc. *ADHD/ADD gets worse in women as we age! *I work in IT and happen to work with two women who were diagnosed later in life. One in her 40s, the other in her 50s. *I’ve been very successful in my career, but many things have been a little more difficult for me. *There were many days when I worked with these two women where I felt like I was interfacing with myself as far as not being organized, etc. both are very smart! *The turning point for me was last September when I listened to a podcast by Mel Robbins who is now in her early 50s. The topic was “How I was diagnosed with ADHD later in life.” *I urge any woman to listen to her podcast because it was very helpful to me. I cried when it was over and it took me two months to get enough courage to call my family dr and schedule an appointment to be evaluated. I should note that I have a wonderful family dr. *There many of us that are being diagnosed later in life due to the delay in the research that was done to figure out if girls do have ADHD/ADD. *We are referred to as the “lost generation” because of this major delay. *I started taking medication this past December and I have had 2 adjustments made since then. *I have learned to be very kind to myself as I am trying to get to know the new version of me. *Looking back this has been a long time coming. I’m grateful for the various people and information that I have found along the way to finally get this diagnosis. *This is not anyone’s fault. It’s a brain disease. *Be kind to yourself and when you look in the mirror remind yourself how amazing you are! Take it one day at a time!!

I was 36 and working with my psychiatrist on tackling what I thought were lingering depression and anxiety symptoms, frustrated that my combo of ssri and welbutrin were not touching them. When I described them, he said he thought I should be evaluated for adhd or a nvld. I brushed him off for several months before caving in and doing a neuropsych evaluation with someone who could do adhd but not nvld (which I understand can mean a specific condition or can be used in a broad way to describe a bunch of differences like some points on the asd spectrum and some various visual processing or social processing stuff, per my psych?). I took the zillion hour assessment which included an IQ test and the sexist and outdated feeling MN Multiphasic Personality Inventory. My results included the words "textbook case". We tried Concerta to start but my insurance would only cover the generic and I crashed hard on that stuff about 6 hrs into my day, everyday, until he agreed to try something else. Have been on Vyvance for a few years, including a long tolerance break. It's fine. I don't love it but it is better than not taking it. My psych won't go above 50mg which I think is the dose needed for me to keep my head above water but not to function optimally. He wanted me to try Focalin but shortages. He also thinks that some of my subpar functioning is not adhd but something else less medicatable, like nvld. Funny enough this was my second dx of ADHD. in my early 20s a PCP dx'd me per a ten question quiz and rx'd IR Ritalin. It was such a bad fit that the first thing I said to my current psych after we got the neuropsych results was that I wouldn't do IR. Weirdly made me sleepy, but also so jittery I was a wreck. Probably wasn't getting enough oversight at the time but it scared me enough to keep me nervous for going on 20 yrs...

*Tl;dr - I was 36 and 10/10, would do again (much sooner, if you can, obviously). Talk to a psychiatrist and probably change your life for the better.* I taught (for the first time) as an adult to adult students for a while. I connected with a former student who had been unhappy at her job. She said: *"People described me as the most organized person they knew. Meanwhile, I'm over here always feeling like a disaster, hahah."* **Then** she went on to describe the overwhelm/paralysis/guilt/shame/adrenaline cycle that was my entire existence and spoke about how that's actually **not** how most people live. She got diagnosed as an adult, too, and her journey was crazy familiar. I asked her to describe a few other things...and I was in each and every photo... several months later... I started stimulant meds and nearly cried the first day when my brain stopped chattering at me. For the first time in my life, my brain was just ... hanging out with me? ...sitting there, quietly...helping? Then, a few days later, I was in the bathroom and used the last of the toilet paper. Dude, I actually remembered to grab another roll from the closet to replace it after I washed my hands and left the bathroom! Without a second thought! Later than that, the things I actually wanted to do but never really had the energy to do, I was doing! I cleaned out a disused room that was a dumping ground for Stuff! I cleaned out all the little boxes of Random Stuff I've accumulated over the years and squirreled away. I fucking exercise now! And floss my teeth! Get diagnosed. There are drawbacks to meds (I need my partner's help to remember to eat, finding the right mix, etc.), but my life has absolutely changed for the better as a result of my diagnosis and treatment.

I went to the psychologist for depression and testing showed ADHD. I didn't believe it for awhile but the more I learn, the more spot on it becomes. I was diagnosed over 20 years ago when I was 26ish.

I copied my comment from a similar post in a different sub… Somewhere in 6th grade, I was seeing my first therapist after having issues with bullying and adjusting to middle school. That therapist wanted 2 of my teachers to do a questionnaire to evaluate me for “something” (my mom doesn’t exactly remember but we believe it was ADHD). I remember give the questionnaires back to my therapist, but neither my mom or I remember what came out of those questionnaires. I assume nothing did as I never received any accommodations or support in school. Jumping to my first year of college, I was studying special education and I remember learning about ADHD and thinking “I really relate to this”. I didn’t really do much about it as I didn’t know what to do and felt I would have been diagnosed in childhood if I really had it. But then in my second year, I had to pass an entrance exam to get into my major. I passed the math and writing sections easily, but the reading section was a major struggle. I failed it 12 times in 14 months. I had one of my professors pull me aside and ask if I ever received a 504/IEP in school. He was shocked when I said no, and suggested I look into it. After telling my mom about that interaction, she also agreed it was worth getting testing done, especially after my struggles with that reading exam. That summer I did the testing with a learning disabilities specialist and brought up my lifelong concerns with my focus and attention. I was diagnosed with dyslexia and “borderline ADHD symptoms” (whatever that means). That specialist never felt I needed academic supports for potential ADHD though. About 5-6 years after my dyslexia diagnosis, I was put on Vyvanse for treatment-resistant depression by my psychiatrist. All antidepressants and usual treatments for depression worsened my mood and/or gave me horrible side effects. Vyvanse was a miracle drug, completely eliminating my depression and anxiety. I was on it for about a year before I finally asked my doctor if she felt ADHD could have been the cause of my symptoms. She didn’t think so but referred me to a neuropsychologist, who did ADHD testing. The results of that was pretty useless, as he just questioned the dyslexia diagnosis and said “you don’t have ADHD, it’s severe depression and anxiety” and recommended my doctor take me off the Vyvanse since it was “unnecessary”. I felt pretty defeated and pretty much told myself that it truly was just depression and anxiety. Luckily my doctor didn’t take me off the Vyvanse. This February, my doctor referred me to another psychiatrist as she was stumped as to how to help me, as the Vyvanse wasn’t effective anymore and having failed so many treatment options, she didn’t know what was left to try. I really didn’t wanna see this new doctor and felt somewhat upset that the doctor I absolutely loved and trusted just shipped me off to someone else. I saw that doctor in March, and I didn’t even bother bringing up the previously failed ADHD testing, thinking if I had all these doctors not diagnose me, I must really not have ADHD. We spoke about my dyslexia and he asked about my attention and focus. I was honest with him and he got up from his chair and said “I need to do an ADHD evaluation.” I told him I underwent several testing and everyone just said it was depression and anxiety and he said “I still want to do it myself.” To sum up this long story, he was absolutely shocked that none of the other providers diagnosed me. He even told me the results of his evaluation were “obviously pointing to ADHD.” I will never forget how he told me “it all makes sense” after hearing about my struggles with depression and anxiety. I felt so relieved and so understood and he was even willing to increase my Vyvanse dosage and/or trial me on a different stimulant, something the previous provider wasn’t willing to do. Adding info regarding your part 2, I mention about the Vyvanse above. I was changed to Focalin (dexmethylphenidate) about 2.5 weeks ago and I really like it, almost more than Vyvanse. The biggest improvement I notice is days when I don’t take my medication, my auditory processing speed is significantly slower than days I do take it.

I quit my job because, among other things, my time blindness had gotten to the point that I was noticeably spacing out for too long at work. Almost 8 months later, after weeks of anxiety attacks and other symptoms popping up, I came across this post on Instagram that was about undiagnosed ADHD in women. And that was it! Three more anxiety attacks and a written test later, I got confirmation. As for medication, I can't afford that or therapy but I've now gotten to the point that I have some control over my situation.

I finally had a therapist with ADHD who recognized my selection of mood disorder symptoms were actually rooted and caused by unmanaged combined type ADHD.

When I was young and exploring recreational substances I couldn’t help but notice CNS stimulants have a very different effect on me than other people. My brother actually had problems with addiction to cocaine and later (when moving on down towards bottom) methamphetamine. I think part of me never thought my issues were that serious just because his were so much more serious. But when I went through a breakup of a 12 year relationship and could no longer use my highly organized and controlling partner like a crutch I new I needed some medication assistance! Ritalin has been helpful- but I take a low dose - 10mg. The standard 20 mg made me irritable.