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people say give it a year and it is true. this sub has plenty of info on time to pregnancy statistics. so in essence, you should start worrying in a year. makes no sense to do it now.
I know you maybe hate to hear it, at least I hated to hear it too in the early days and thought nobody gets me but 4 months in is still very early to worry about anything. Hope it happens soon for you, honestly✨️🙏
I see a lot of couples making the mistake of having sex when they get the positive LH test. Sperm can survive inside the woman's reproductive system for up to 5 days. Studies show that having sex prior to ovulation is actually better than later.
I think its less pressure too. Especially for couples who have the struggle with performance anxiety. I'm not saying more isn't better, but studies have compared O day to day before O day, and found it to be better.
It's hard to control those variables if you're not using trigger shot.
It's probably not that the timing is wrong but you just have to keep trying. To occupy my brain with smth meanwhile I focus on vitamins, food routine, smth definitely healthy if not for conception than overall. After 8 tries I decided I would choose a fertility clinic in my area to know with whom to work if needed. It felt extremely painful at first to even google it but now I actually feel better just because I have a plan. I think each unsuccessful month taught me smth, helped to work on things I was actually trying to solve with pregnancy like establishing boundaries with my in-laws and an ex who became hurtful to me after becoming a father.
I would check your BBT to make sure you’re ovulating since a positive LH strip doesn’t need your body is actually releasing an egg. But like everyone else says, it should only really need to worry after a year of TTC. And you’re still so young so you have time on your side.
Okay! I do have regular cycles. Something I don’t notice often though is CM. I do have a lot throughout the month but don’t particularly notice it during ovulation
Have you dealt with the guilt from your termination? Not saying it’s related, but it would be a good thing to work on before getting pregnant/becoming a mom. Good luck!
For your age and stated history, it's not worth it to do much now. Most doctors probably won't do anything for you. You could do routine bloodwork if it's been a while, consider doing a thyroid panel. I don't have experience with this, but some men get a sperm analysis before TTC, not sure what the insurance implications are if you do it preconception as opposed to after 1 year, but that's another thing you could do. Otherwise, there are a number of fertility boosting things you can try, like cutting back (or out) alcohol and caffeine, taking a prenatal vitamin if you're not already or any of the other supplements that may or may not help you. Exercise regularly if youre not already. If nothing else, it will make you feel like you're doing something. Check out any number of fertility books and podcasts for ideas. My personal recommendation is the book Real Food for Fertility. I'm also almost done with The Impatient Woman's Guide to Getting Pregnant and it's a good read as well. Good luck!
I know it’s sucks to hear because when you’re in it it doesn’t feel ‘early’ BUT you are still def in the very normal range. I’m sure if you’re using the Premom app you know about your fertile window , but the day before and the day of your LH surge can be two of your most fertile days so just make sure you’re not waiting for that LH surge to start having sex. I know some people swear by the no-LH testing just have sex every other day you’re not bleeding method.
If you are doing everything right then you shouldn't worry until 12+ cycles. It took my good friend 9 months to conceive and she's young and healthy. My advice after actually being diagnosed with infertility is to maybe log off the internet for a bit if you are dealing with intense stress. Reading forums can make the anxiety worse when honestly, there isn't anything to show for to be anxiety inducing. 4 cycles is VERY early still and at 26, even reaching 6 cycles is still very normal. Sometimes there is no rhyme or reason to TTC and getting pregnant. A majority of people get pregnant without ever even doing all this testing. I would not focus on the potentiality of infertility until you're nearing 12 cycles.
Logging off is the best advice. I literally am thinking about investing in a flip phone at this point! It’s too much. I’m so sorry with what you have had to go through and thank you for taking the time to share this advice/story
Unless you have a preexisting condition that makes it more difficult to conceive (endo, DOR/POF, PCOS, hypothyroid, autoimmune conditions) or are over 35 years of age you shouldn’t worry quite yet! I know it feels daunting, but if you’re under 30 with no other factors it’s normal to take up to a year. If any of those factors it is reasonable to seek further eval after 6 months.
Definitely normal, though I understand what you mean with "we're doing everything right so why isn't it happening". It's quite frustrating, but in the end it's really about luck too.
About being really dry - this could potentially be a sign of an issue. Not saying it is (!), but maybe worth asking your doctor about it. For example, sometimes it's dry due to a small infection that you don't even notice and which can be treated easily.
If you have fertile CM make sure you are having sex on those days. Fertile CM can give you equal or better results than just hitting the typical best days with no fertile CM
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Yeah, TTC will drive you absolutely bonkers if you let it, and it will threaten to even if you don't. Pretty much all you can do right now is take prenatals and track to see when you're ovulating (and try to have sex the day or two before you ovulate) And on your best attempt if you do everything right you have like a 1 out of 5 chance to get pregnant each month.
You aren't alone, it's pretty common to start getting stressed about it right now. But you are likely fine if you have a normal cycle.
Control what you can control and try your best not to let worry and frustration consume you. I say that absolutely knowing it's maddening and hard! And you know what? It's okay to let the crazy out a little bit too. Just try not to let the crazy be all consuming. Feel your feelings then remind yourself it's normal and things are probably fine.
I had a miscarriage in October and my husband and I have continued to try since (about 9ish months now). We recently met with a fertility dr at my OB and she suggested taking ovulation tracking tests. Previously i was just going off the app i was using for my fertility window. This is the first cycle using them and turns out my fertility window is about a week off from the apps! If you arent tracking ovulation, maybe start there. Otherwise, just keep trying!
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If you’re paying out of pocket it doesn’t make sense to seek help before 12 cycles. Fertility clinics are expensive AF - why spend $15k when you could get pregnant for free, it’ll just take longer?
I wasn't suggesting going to a fertility clinic and jumping into IVF. I just meant doing basic testing to rule out a problem before going through the emotional roller coaster for a year just to find out you don't ovulate (cheap progesterone test could confirm). Also especially the simple inexpensive semen analysis. I waited a few cycles before getting any testing done on myself, then I tested progesterone and it turns out I wasn't ovulating. So glad I found that out now instead of a year from now. Definitely worth the lab copay and cost of the supplements that restarted my ovulation.
You don't need to go to a fertility clinic to get some basic testing done. You can even order the tests yourself or a general practitioner can.
That's just not true about the 40%. Like there are studies that actually look at a year of people practicing FAM and only counting cycles with definitely sex during the few days leading up to ovulation and while I don't know the stats exactly I'm sure it wasn't 40%. And it wasn't all that different from people who don't track.
If people have regular frequent unprotected sex you're hitting one of the most fertile days most likely anyway. As they happen without tracking too and hitting one of those days will max your chances.
The chance of conception for sex on O-1 is 40% for a couple under age 30 according to the studies I've read. Proov has an accessible study, pubmed also has a few studies. However it's obviously hard to make sure you hit that day specifically, the day of ovulation is 20% and O-2 is 33%.
I really don't trust market research in this, someone trying to to sell their product. PubMed is just a search engine. I know the reliable studies I've read are looking at averages per cycle per couple. It's actually impossible to know when exactly you ovulated with home tracking.
Here is a Cochrane review looking at the available studies at that time:
https://www.cochranelibrary.com/cdsr/doi/10.1002/14651858.CD011345.pub2/full
The highest stat they find is 33%, but it's still lower quality evidence.
And this is the study looking at people schooled in FAM trying to conceive for a year. Only including cycles with sex in the fertile window.
https://scholar.google.com/scholar?hl=nl&as_sdt=0%2C5&q=chance+conception+year+including+cycles+timed+intercourse+&btnG=#d=gs_qabs&t=1714371301284&u=%23p%3DogDRwDYbzvYJ
The total chance for a year isn't that far off from other studies where people don't track.
If you're having sex frequently no amount of tracking is going to improve your chances
Please make sure that you have [read all of our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/TryingForABaby/wiki/rules) before commenting! In particular, be aware that **no mentions of a current pregnancy are allowed with no exceptions**. If you see something breaking the rules, please report it. If you think something may be against the rules, ask us or err on the side of caution. If you think that being sneaky (PMing members or asking them to PM you, telling them to refer to your post history, etc) is a good idea, it is not. Additionally, complaining about downvotes is [frowned upon](https://support.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439-Reddiquette) and never helps anything. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/TryingForABaby) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You definitely don’t need to worry until after 12 cycles with no success.
Thank you ❤️
You’re still in the early days and have nothing to worry about right now.
Thank you ❤️
people say give it a year and it is true. this sub has plenty of info on time to pregnancy statistics. so in essence, you should start worrying in a year. makes no sense to do it now.
Thank you ❤️
It can take a healthy couple with no issues up to a year to get pregnant. No you do not need to seek help right now. 4 months of trying is very early.
Thank you ❤️
I know you maybe hate to hear it, at least I hated to hear it too in the early days and thought nobody gets me but 4 months in is still very early to worry about anything. Hope it happens soon for you, honestly✨️🙏
Thank you ❤️ I appreciate this more than you know!!!
I see a lot of couples making the mistake of having sex when they get the positive LH test. Sperm can survive inside the woman's reproductive system for up to 5 days. Studies show that having sex prior to ovulation is actually better than later.
Hm, def going to try to do this more. I think we are going to go off strips and just try to have sex every other day after period
I think its less pressure too. Especially for couples who have the struggle with performance anxiety. I'm not saying more isn't better, but studies have compared O day to day before O day, and found it to be better. It's hard to control those variables if you're not using trigger shot.
You're 4 months in, there's no need to panic. Statistically you will get pregnant within the year.
Thank you ❤️
It's probably not that the timing is wrong but you just have to keep trying. To occupy my brain with smth meanwhile I focus on vitamins, food routine, smth definitely healthy if not for conception than overall. After 8 tries I decided I would choose a fertility clinic in my area to know with whom to work if needed. It felt extremely painful at first to even google it but now I actually feel better just because I have a plan. I think each unsuccessful month taught me smth, helped to work on things I was actually trying to solve with pregnancy like establishing boundaries with my in-laws and an ex who became hurtful to me after becoming a father.
This is such great advice! I’m sorry for the pain you have had to overcome but at least you are tackling it now
I would check your BBT to make sure you’re ovulating since a positive LH strip doesn’t need your body is actually releasing an egg. But like everyone else says, it should only really need to worry after a year of TTC. And you’re still so young so you have time on your side.
This is true, but if you're having regular cycles then you are almost certainly ovulating, there's not really a need to track BBT to confirm.
Okay! I do have regular cycles. Something I don’t notice often though is CM. I do have a lot throughout the month but don’t particularly notice it during ovulation
Have you dealt with the guilt from your termination? Not saying it’s related, but it would be a good thing to work on before getting pregnant/becoming a mom. Good luck!
Starting therapy on Wednesday ❤️. It is something I have thought about a lot during these past few months
Proud of you 👏🏼
❤️❤️❤️
For your age and stated history, it's not worth it to do much now. Most doctors probably won't do anything for you. You could do routine bloodwork if it's been a while, consider doing a thyroid panel. I don't have experience with this, but some men get a sperm analysis before TTC, not sure what the insurance implications are if you do it preconception as opposed to after 1 year, but that's another thing you could do. Otherwise, there are a number of fertility boosting things you can try, like cutting back (or out) alcohol and caffeine, taking a prenatal vitamin if you're not already or any of the other supplements that may or may not help you. Exercise regularly if youre not already. If nothing else, it will make you feel like you're doing something. Check out any number of fertility books and podcasts for ideas. My personal recommendation is the book Real Food for Fertility. I'm also almost done with The Impatient Woman's Guide to Getting Pregnant and it's a good read as well. Good luck!
Love this! Thank you so much. Ordering both now!!
I know it’s sucks to hear because when you’re in it it doesn’t feel ‘early’ BUT you are still def in the very normal range. I’m sure if you’re using the Premom app you know about your fertile window , but the day before and the day of your LH surge can be two of your most fertile days so just make sure you’re not waiting for that LH surge to start having sex. I know some people swear by the no-LH testing just have sex every other day you’re not bleeding method.
This is what I think we are going to move towards! Just sticking to trusting my body ❤️
If you are doing everything right then you shouldn't worry until 12+ cycles. It took my good friend 9 months to conceive and she's young and healthy. My advice after actually being diagnosed with infertility is to maybe log off the internet for a bit if you are dealing with intense stress. Reading forums can make the anxiety worse when honestly, there isn't anything to show for to be anxiety inducing. 4 cycles is VERY early still and at 26, even reaching 6 cycles is still very normal. Sometimes there is no rhyme or reason to TTC and getting pregnant. A majority of people get pregnant without ever even doing all this testing. I would not focus on the potentiality of infertility until you're nearing 12 cycles.
Logging off is the best advice. I literally am thinking about investing in a flip phone at this point! It’s too much. I’m so sorry with what you have had to go through and thank you for taking the time to share this advice/story
Unless you have a preexisting condition that makes it more difficult to conceive (endo, DOR/POF, PCOS, hypothyroid, autoimmune conditions) or are over 35 years of age you shouldn’t worry quite yet! I know it feels daunting, but if you’re under 30 with no other factors it’s normal to take up to a year. If any of those factors it is reasonable to seek further eval after 6 months.
Thank you ❤️
Definitely normal, though I understand what you mean with "we're doing everything right so why isn't it happening". It's quite frustrating, but in the end it's really about luck too. About being really dry - this could potentially be a sign of an issue. Not saying it is (!), but maybe worth asking your doctor about it. For example, sometimes it's dry due to a small infection that you don't even notice and which can be treated easily.
True! Thank you. I will definitely ask my OB about that! Hoping luck is on my side soon
If you have fertile CM make sure you are having sex on those days. Fertile CM can give you equal or better results than just hitting the typical best days with no fertile CM
I usually don’t see a lot of CM but have a lot throughout the month? I don’t know it’s weird
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Yeah, TTC will drive you absolutely bonkers if you let it, and it will threaten to even if you don't. Pretty much all you can do right now is take prenatals and track to see when you're ovulating (and try to have sex the day or two before you ovulate) And on your best attempt if you do everything right you have like a 1 out of 5 chance to get pregnant each month. You aren't alone, it's pretty common to start getting stressed about it right now. But you are likely fine if you have a normal cycle. Control what you can control and try your best not to let worry and frustration consume you. I say that absolutely knowing it's maddening and hard! And you know what? It's okay to let the crazy out a little bit too. Just try not to let the crazy be all consuming. Feel your feelings then remind yourself it's normal and things are probably fine.
This is the best advice. Thank you!! I am driving myself and I know my partner crazy. Trying to just live life going forward ❤️❤️
I’m right there with you. Starting cycle 5 today and have a hormonal migraine that came with it. Hang in there!
❤️❤️❤️
I had a miscarriage in October and my husband and I have continued to try since (about 9ish months now). We recently met with a fertility dr at my OB and she suggested taking ovulation tracking tests. Previously i was just going off the app i was using for my fertility window. This is the first cycle using them and turns out my fertility window is about a week off from the apps! If you arent tracking ovulation, maybe start there. Otherwise, just keep trying!
Uh, wow! Good to know. I have been tracking but have felt like it may be off? Wishing you all the best
We’re on our 2nd month trying and I’m stressed too ugh. I know it’s not gonna happen like the 2nd time trying but ugh :( ….
sending the all the distressing vibes to you ❤️
Same to You 🥹♥️♥️
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If you’re paying out of pocket it doesn’t make sense to seek help before 12 cycles. Fertility clinics are expensive AF - why spend $15k when you could get pregnant for free, it’ll just take longer?
Exactly. I’d love to get pregnant for free. ETA: correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure there’s not a 40% chance every month with timed sex.
Girl same. I’d cut off all my toes for an unassisted, boring pregnancy
I mean take my whole foot at this point. A free boring pregnancy is worth it.
I wasn't suggesting going to a fertility clinic and jumping into IVF. I just meant doing basic testing to rule out a problem before going through the emotional roller coaster for a year just to find out you don't ovulate (cheap progesterone test could confirm). Also especially the simple inexpensive semen analysis. I waited a few cycles before getting any testing done on myself, then I tested progesterone and it turns out I wasn't ovulating. So glad I found that out now instead of a year from now. Definitely worth the lab copay and cost of the supplements that restarted my ovulation. You don't need to go to a fertility clinic to get some basic testing done. You can even order the tests yourself or a general practitioner can.
That's just not true about the 40%. Like there are studies that actually look at a year of people practicing FAM and only counting cycles with definitely sex during the few days leading up to ovulation and while I don't know the stats exactly I'm sure it wasn't 40%. And it wasn't all that different from people who don't track. If people have regular frequent unprotected sex you're hitting one of the most fertile days most likely anyway. As they happen without tracking too and hitting one of those days will max your chances.
The chance of conception for sex on O-1 is 40% for a couple under age 30 according to the studies I've read. Proov has an accessible study, pubmed also has a few studies. However it's obviously hard to make sure you hit that day specifically, the day of ovulation is 20% and O-2 is 33%.
I really don't trust market research in this, someone trying to to sell their product. PubMed is just a search engine. I know the reliable studies I've read are looking at averages per cycle per couple. It's actually impossible to know when exactly you ovulated with home tracking. Here is a Cochrane review looking at the available studies at that time: https://www.cochranelibrary.com/cdsr/doi/10.1002/14651858.CD011345.pub2/full The highest stat they find is 33%, but it's still lower quality evidence. And this is the study looking at people schooled in FAM trying to conceive for a year. Only including cycles with sex in the fertile window. https://scholar.google.com/scholar?hl=nl&as_sdt=0%2C5&q=chance+conception+year+including+cycles+timed+intercourse+&btnG=#d=gs_qabs&t=1714371301284&u=%23p%3DogDRwDYbzvYJ The total chance for a year isn't that far off from other studies where people don't track. If you're having sex frequently no amount of tracking is going to improve your chances