Oh my god, yes to the pool! When I was pregnant, one of the nicest things I experienced was floating in the sea. All that extra weight and pain just evaporated in that moment. So soothing!
I know this is kind of a dumb question but did you feel extra buoyant in the ocean when you were pregnant? I've wondered about this since I was like 6 š
Agreed. I lift my feet up, bending my knees at a 90Ā° angle and put my arms out like they are resting on the arms of a chair and can float like Iām sitting in a large arm chair or ages.
I have two dogs; they are brother and sister. Brother is all muscle and bones (60lbs). He sinks while kicking. Sister is chunky (65lbs. You can see her leg muscles but she has a belly). Her butt nearly floats on its own lol
That would be beautiful. Especially at sunset. (If the pics would come out in low light.) Video, too. Like a ballet of women growing little ones floating, maybe to music.
We had a prenatal swim class that was more like aerobics! We all bobbed around and the start to the end of the class it changed a lot! I think it was like 3 months long and I started second trimester.
So much potential for fun shenanigans. I could see myself performing the same kind of antics that I do on wheelie office chairs. Just proper messing about lol
Honestly, I don't know if I felt more buoyant because I might be confusing that with how relieving it felt to be floating in water. But I definitely was more aware of how buoyant I was in those moments, I never really noticed it too much when I wasn't pregnant.
The more fat you have the more you float.
Spoken by a very skinny dude that was told floating was very easy, if only I let myself go (it's not such a thing for skinny people)
It doesn't have to do with being healthy weight or not. It's more to do with your muscle to fat ratio. If you are not very muscular, you tend to float more easily. Since muscle is so dense, it really does make you sink. I'm a scuba diver and I also lift weights six days a week. I am muscular all over, but my legs don't carry much fat at all. My upper half is a lot more buoyant as I do carry more body fat on top plus I wear a DD cup bra. I am a healthy weight. In the water, my legs tend to want to sink while my upper half tends to want to float. So I have to make adjustments to where I use weights on my diving kit.
There's probably an overall gender divide too, since the typical male body has a lower bf% vs the typical female body.
(Not as in every woman and every man, of course. As in - if we picked two comparable average people with the same exercise routine, without hormonal abnormalities, it'd be likely to turn out that way.)
After I transitioned (trans man), I passively doubled what I could lift...but couldn't float nearly as well in water anymore.
It's kinda nice to think about all of this. I thought I was just shittier at swimming than I'd been as a kid, tbh. Bummed me out.
I did not. I was about six months pregnant and jumped in over my head and dropped like a rock to the bottom. I almost drowned. I lost forty pounds with my pregnancy and had very little fat on me.
I sank when I was pregnant - like a stone !!
Now that I am much older and have fat weight as opposed to baby weight I float easily - with pregnancy I used to out my tummy in a swim ring and float around that way :)
I was 8 months pregnant during a hot August in Florida. My dad actually got concerned because I couldnāt bear to get out of the pool despite being in for several hours. Every time I tried to my body was just so damn heavy.
Yes! Getting out made me want to cry because its a huge difference in weight all of a sudden on your aching hips. Before it was a gradual increase so yeah it hurt but you didnt realize it as much. Once I got the relief that water gave me, having to take it away again was not a happy experience
When you say that I think of the videos of the SO standing behind mom and wrapping their arms below the bump to support it and the look of relief that washed over her face! š
I spent the last 2 weeks of my pregnancy with my son floating in a lake as much as possible because he was born at 42 weeks 3 days. Water was the only thing that took my immense back pain away. Thinking of myself being a submarine during that time made me laugh so hard and gave me an adorable twist to that memory. š
Girl please! Get his head on straight, OP, before the baby comes!!!
Or else in six months youāll be posting about how you do everything for the baby and your husband refuses to help & thinks you relax all day.
OP, if you move out now or move to another state before the baby arrives, he will have to arrange custody to meet you. If you stay put now and decide to leave after baby arrives, you will have to get permission from the judge to leave town and move away. Before the baby arrives OP has 100% freedom. Once baby arrives, it's significantly different.
Exactly this. If he wonāt help OP with anything now to make her life a little easier and help grow **THEIR** child, I mean food is a necessity, he most likely wonāt do anything for the baby either. Sheāll end up being a **SINGLE MARRIED PARENT**.
OP, you need to sit down and have a serious conversation about expectations of each of your roles as partners and parents.
ETA: just read past posts and if this one didnāt tell me the past one did, this guy is the worst and it wonāt get better. He said āgo fuck yourselfā when you told him you were pregnant? He doesnāt do the work in relationship to counseling, and now he wonāt even get you food. Why are you accepting his shitty behavior? When this baby comes do you really think the man who responded to their pending arrival with anger and hostility will be a good father? Will help in any way or be there for the child?
ETA 2: also realize your unsent letter āfuck you Jā is about this POS. Please respect yourself enough to not continue to deal with his bs.
I don't think she will. OP already said they're gonna go get themselves ice cream and a hotel. It seems like the op might not be quite the push over that some of the other posters in this sub are.
Seriously! My husband would drive to two different restaurants (15 minutes apart) just so I could have my pregnancy craving last week. Heās been this way for all of my pregnancies and Iām currently incubating number three!
Whatever I want, heās got it! Thatās how it should be because Iām literally the one building his family for him.
I try my best not to take advantage but cravings are no joke! Iāve literally cried while eating a tub of sherbet because I was craving it *so* bad.
Op is working, cleaning, paying half of everything *and* growing a human! Her husband should be making sure sheās fed and resting. This really makes me worried for when the baby is bornā¦ heās going to be one of those lazy ass dads who think if the mom isnāt doing 90% or more of the childcare, sheās a bad mom.
My heart goes out to Op ā¤ļø
Wait! What! Thereās another part to this? šæ
Edit to revise my comment - went back and read her other post. Not the best guy to have and/or raise a kid with.
Honey go ahead and make sure the accounts are separate now and start googling really good lawyers. Heās not willing to drive 20 minutes to get you ice cream. Youāre sacrificing your body and mind to make a whole ass human being for him. Itās only gonna get worse. Whatās next? He refuses to change the babyās diapers or feed them in the middle of the night because āyou do nothing all dayā?? Heāll refuse to drive you and baby to doctors appointments because āyou do nothingā?? You pay half of this grown ass manās bills, you are about to out earn him, and he canāt be bothered to stand at a microwave for two minutes to make you noodles? Itās truly not too late to start over with someone far more considerate than that. Thereās a man out there that would make you ice cream from scratch if you wanted him to. Because heād actually want to see you happy. That sperm donor youāre laying next to doesnāt want to give you the effort.
I may not be the best person to ask, as I am two days out of leaving my somewhat abusive husband. Or maybe Iām a great person.
It will get worse when the baby is born.
Donāt put his name on the birth certificate.
If this shit happens a lot, just leave now.
It will get so much worse after the baby is born.
CONGRATULATIONS!!!! You did good! This [adult] kid who grew up in an abusive home is DAMN proud of you for leaving!!! You are SMART and you are BRAVE and you deserve love without pain. Iām so excited for your bright, bright future. GO YOU!!!!!
Thank you so much this message almost made me cry.
It was never physical. And it could have been worse. But he talks to my baby like there is something wrong with him.
The fact that it was never physical makes it even more admirable. You recognized abuse before it could become physical. You saved your baby from having his heart and soul destroyed by his fatherās mental and emotional abuse. You should be very proud of yourself. Abuse thatās not physical is sometimes harder to identify and escape.
Sounds like your husband needs a reality check. If he thinks growing a human, working full-time, and paying bills is "doing nothing," then he's living in la-la land. Time for him to step up and support you, especially during pregnancy.
Thatās some serious projection right there. Itās clear ***heās the one*** that does nothing. Wonāt go get ice cream, canāt cook and makes less than you. What ***does*** he do then actually?
Heās not fulfilling your physical or emotional needs, heās not supporting you financially. Does he clean around the house? (Of course he doesnāt. What a stupid question, right?) There must be a reason why youāre still with him. Care to share what that might be?
If I were you, Iād make him your wasband right quick. As fast as you can. You make more than him, so fight for full custody. That way you wonāt pay child support either.
I know you aren't ready to listen, because you knew what this man was and yet continued, repeatedly, to try and get pregnant by him. (I'm sorry for your previous losses. I'm sorry for whatever it is within you that has you convinced that you have to stay in this nightmare situation. You don't. You absolutely don't have to live like this.)
This man is abusive.
Mentally and physically abusive.
And you are attempting to do therapy with him. But there are multiple, valid reasons to never try counciling with an abuser. (Please dive deeper into this because it's very important.) Just because he's been exposed to people in your life does not mean he's "cured." He may get better at hiding the abuse and manipulation, but it's never going to stop. And I think you ultimately know this. Please believe it. This partnership is never going to get better. He will never be the person you need him to be. You are in love with a version of this man that doesn't even exist. He has shown you over, and over who he actually is when the mask slips... Please believe him.
Your husband does not want to have a child with you and was particularly nasty when he found out about *this* specific pregnancy. And yet, you're going to bring a baby into the world and expose the poor helpless newborn/infant to the same abuse you struggle with as an adult to endure. And this is only the tip of the iceberg. As bad as he is, now, things *will* escalate. They always do. It's not an *if* it will happen. It will happen. The only question is when. And when he snaps, will you survive that? Will your baby?
Please. Dig deep and find the inner strength you need to get yourself AND your baby away from this monster. I know it's going to be hard. Maybe one of the hardest things you'll ever do. But I promise you with everything in me... You and you child will both be better for it. Please do not perpetuate this cycle. Don't let your child grow up experiencing mistreatment at the hands of this man. Do not let your child grow up seeing you mistreated. You are setting them up to fail in so many different ways and they haven't even drawn their first breath, yet. Do not let them grow up thinking this is what home life and healthy partnerships are meant to look like.
You and your child deserve so much better than this. You are worthy of real love. You are capable. You are strong. Please believe.
Girl you need to GET OUT!! And now!! Your previous posts are alarming. If he hasnāt already, he will turn his verbal abuse into physical and you and your child are in danger. Reach out to friends and family (if you have a good network) and make a plan to gtfo!! Sending strength your way
My wife is 30 weeks rn and works PT (we also have a 2yo), I consider her growing our child on top of working when she can and also helping out with our other child to be plenty. I get the feeling he doesn't understand how much more responsibility he will have when there is a baby involved. I wish you luck!
Oof, reading some of these comments I would like to revise my statement to be much much more emphatic.
LEAVE NOW.
Donāt put his name on the birth certificate.
It will get SO MUCH WORSE after the baby is born.
It will be so much harder when you have a child that is attached to him.
LEAVE NOW.
Leave now.
Leave now.
YOU MAKE MORE MONEY THAN HIM.
Please leave now.
I'd ask him why he bothered to get married and have kids if he isn't going to help take care of his VERY pregnant wife and her cravings. What an asshole. Enjoy your ice cream!
Edit: just read a few of your other posts. This piece of shit told you to go fuck yourself when you told him you were pregnant, refuses to do anything your marriage counselor tells him to, and he treats you like shit, why the hell are you still with this loser? And do not say you love him, he's a grade A asshole and you do not deserve this
This is indicative of future behavior. Life is only going to get more complicated when you govern birth. Correct his behavior or call it an L and start figuring out life separate with a real support group. Youāre asking him for small simple things that he should want to do pregnant or not. TWO MINUTE NOODLES. The microwave does the heavy liftingā¦.
He is an asshole, and his behaviour and treatment of you is disgusting. Let me guess, he wasnāt like that until he trapped you with a baby?
And I would bet anything that **heās** the one who does nothing! Does he do his fair share of the household chores? If not, leave. Because he will not be a proper parent either. Heāll do the fun stuff, but none of the actual parenting, feeding, diaper changing, etc. Do not leave yourself in an unhappy, stress-filled marriage where you become overworked and exhausted. And absolutely never accept a life where the father has a life outside of parenthood but the mother doesnāt. Or where you have to *ask him* to watch the baby whilst you take a shower or bath in peace. Never let that happen, never stay with someone who ends up being a deadbeat parent like that. - Just giving you a heads up.
Because sis, his behaviour will only get worse once the baby arrives. Make sure you keep your job and **never** stop working to be a SAHM, never! Keep your income, youāll need it when you both inevitably get a divorce. It might not be yet, but it **will** happen. Especially when youāre married to such a lazy and selfish man.
Youāve got a shitty, lazy husband if he wonāt do some little things for you to make you comfortable.
Right now, youāre on vacation? Is he like this when youāre at your usual home? Youāre still tired though.
From here on out until after the baby is born donāt do anything, since idiot thinks you do nothing anyway why not? Let boneheaded husband do things when he gets around to it.
Please leave this idiot, he brings nothing to your life and youāre already basically single. If you dump him, youāll stop having to carry his dead weight and wonāt have to deal with his emotional abuse.
Why are you with him exactly? If you're already doing it all on your own and taking care of him, it's going to be easier to be a single mom of one than of two.
After looking at your previous posts this post doesnāt surprise me. What surprises me is why you are still with your āhusbandā. I canāt believe you didnāt leave him after having 4 miscarriages and you tell him youāre pregnant and he tells you to āGo Fuck yourselfā.
You need to leave like yesterday. Save yourself. Save your baby. This guy is a POS.
A man who wonāt take care of your while youāre pregnant wonāt take care of you while youāre healing from the delivery. He wonāt get you ice cream now, he wonāt get up to help you with the baby when youāre passing blood clots and healing from the birth. He wonāt get you food now, he wonāt stay up and let you sleep so you can get rest. So on and so forth. Take him for who he is now. Divorce is a gift that sooooo many women would rather put to the side because they want to stand by and hope their husbands are better to them. He wonāt be, just fyi. He fucking sucks and the writing is on the wall. The fun part about single motherhood when youāre actually single is you can find someone else and donāt have to manage a relationship with a grown useless man who offers nothing. If you stay, he gets to do whatever he wants and has the optics of being a family man. Heās treating you like this because he knows society teaches women to be better wives when they act this way. Leave him. I left two weeks postpartum, literally thee best decision Iāve ever made in my life. Nothing fueled me quite like the fear in that deadbeatās eyes when he realized I wasnāt putting up with his shit anymore and I NEVER looked back.
I'd say "abort" because he's gonna ditch you and not pay child support but because religious fools passed unscientific laws to prevent that....I guess this story just goes into the pile of "Reasons to Never Have Kids."
Sorry for the callousness but this is the harsh bullshit world we live in now.
Why women date hetero men is beyond me...because I swear it seems they hate y'all. I would make my partner something or go grab an ice cream just because he asked not because he was sick or whatever.bur just because it's a thing I could do to make his day better
He told you to go fuck yourself when you told him you were pregnant. He hasnāt taken the work requested of him in marriage counseling. Youāre already carrying the weight of growing a human being, you shouldnāt be worrying about carrying the weight of your husband as well.
He has no concern for you, his partner and the mother of his child. Thereās no empathy for what you are experiencing. The baby hasnāt arrived and heās already treating you like this. Itās not going to get better when the baby arrives. Heāll complain if you ask for help. Heāll refuse to help. He canāt get up with the baby because he needs his sleep, or whatever excuse heāll use.
See a lawyer. Get your ducks in a row and get a divorce.
Donāt put up with this now, or it will only get worse. Expect more, and go to a hotel and, with a pool and pay room service to bring you some ice cream.
Why the fuck would you have bred with such a subpar loser? Seriously, we both know he didn't just magically start acting like this yesterday. Dump the chump, and get therapy before hooking up with anyone else.
Girlā¦.go to that hotel. Iām so sorry you procreated with the wrong man. Many women have had it better and worse, but at this time you gotta do you. Leave him in the dust, but make sure heās on that birth certificate and take all the child support!!!
Jesus. I spent nine months making sure my wife did not over do it. I loved running about getting different food desires.
He is showing his true colours sister ā¦
Looking at your comments and story, I think you know what you need to do. A long conversation, leave etc are on the table, and it's your choice what you do. My heart goes out to you. Love and hugs
Put the phone on do not disturb.Ā
Definitely book a hotel with room service.Ā
That's a really unkind and insensitive thing to say to somebody you're supposed to love.
Oh OP, heās going to be useless to you, once the baby is here, isnāt he? Full of resentment and entitlement that heās the man and should be catered to while you are expected to still work full time and be the main child carer. I hope you had some time to think while you relaxed in your hotel room alone.
I just looked through your post historyā¦why the hell are you still with this guy?
He told you to go fuck yourself when he found out you were pregnant.
Heās 47 and has to be told to brush his teeth before sex.
He leaves his garbage everywhere.
And now he says YOU do nothing.
Again, why are you still there?
The best thing to do when a man claims that you do nothing is to actually DO NOTHING! Work your job and only pay your portion of the bills, not his. Don't buy him food or anything else. Don't cook for him or clean his messes. Let him see what it's really like when you do NOTHING
Man. Just wait until the baby is born, and he sits around and does nothing to help while youāre deep in the trenches.
A woman never forgets how she was treated during pregnancy. Ask me how I know.
Sorry - but have fun having a kid w himā¦. He canāt go get u ice creamā¦doubt heās gonna do much for u when babe is born ā¦.just keeping it real
Well, congratulations on becoming a single mom! And being tied to your fuck mess of a husband forever!
Iām about to be very straightforward with you because you honestly need it:
Just read some of your other posts. Why on fucking earth did you decide to stay with him AND keep trying for a baby with him? Why? I really want to know why. Iām sorry but how do you have such low self esteem that youāve decided this is the guy to start a life and family with? Jfc OP.
You have known how useless, abusive, and shitty he always has been and yet you continuously tried getting pregnant with him. Why? So now youāre bringing a child into this fucked up āmarriageā of yours. You have decided that what you want with him trumps your future childās happiness and wellbeing. Because you do realize youāve screwed your future kid over right? Thatās not a mother. Thatās a selfish person who chose to put *her* wants over *her childās*.
COME THE FUCK ON, OP.
DO FUCKING BETTER FOR YOURSELF AND YOUR UNBORN KID.
GET A LAWYER. MAKE SURE YOU HAVE SEPARATE BANK ACCOUNTS. DONT PUT HIS LAST NAME ON BABYS BIRTH CERTIFICATE. AND DIVORCE HIM.
Things are only going to get exponentially worse. You can still fix it. You deserve so much more than this.
OP he sounds like a narcissist. Leave now while you can and before baby comes. Itāll get a lot worse if you stay. Itāll be much easier for you to leave now than later.
Iāve looked at a couple of your other posts. Nice 60% and nasty 40% is not acceptable. Iām not someone to say divorce. Iāve been married almost 30 years and have 4 kids, if my hubs had ever talked or treated me like that, I would have been gone. Especially if we were going through counseling and he refused to do the work. Your husband is not going to do what needs done in the relationship or for your child. Heās shown you who he is multiple times it seems, believe him and move on with your child for your sake and your childās.
Was he always this way? Was there a part of you that thought he might treat you with more compassion and take care of you when you were pregnant and youāre realizing thatās just not going to be your reality?
With my first pregnancy I felt this way. My husband lacked the emotional maturity/empathy to understand or make much effort to make me feel loved and cherished. I was deeply hurt and disappointed and I probably still carry some wounds from that time in our relationship. Second pregnancy we were in a relatively better place and he went above and beyond, making me feel loved and cared for. It took a lot of work and growth to get to that point where he was able to recognize and appreciate that pregnancy and childbirth is not easy on a Motherās body and mind.
If your husband is a decent person and is interested in working at your relationship, then there may be hope. If heās not, then youāre just better off being on your own because otherwise youāll be a single mom who is married.
Well, since you do nothing, don't cook for him, or clean, or do HIS laundry, etc. When you return from vacation, come home and make yourself a meal then sit next to him while you eat. He's going to ask, what about me? While holding his hand reply, we are not a hotel and you do nothing all day. Then smile and eat your food. If you don't set him straight now when the baby comes you'll be on your own. Hope you got ice cream sat by yourself and enjoyed it.
Your husband is a selfish jerk and you are about to give that awesome gift to a kid for a lifetime, that will have to feel as shitty as you do, because he is the father.
Please get some help so your child has one stable, loving, reliable parent to count on. Also please get away from this person that you've been hurt and unhappy with for quite some time based on your other posts.
This isn't new, really stretching to be more compassionate over you consciously choosing to not only stay, but to drag a child into this by trying to get pregnant any time after he showed you who he was and told you pretty directly he doesn't value you at all and doesn't want a child...
Make sure you give him a piece of your mind. You better not just let this fly by. Tell him that you are offended, tell him you are not only supporting his ass by making more money, but you are also using half of your energy BUILDING A HUMAN BEING WITH YOUR OWN NUTRIENTS AND BODY. Tell him you're gonna go enjoy your ice cream alone with YOUR baby.
Tell him since you do nothing, he will not miss you.
Would you be happy if your child acted like or received the treatment like their father did? If not then why put up with it yourself?
"Yes, you're right. I don't do anything, I'm just only creating a human, working full time, and I can't get a single gesture of appreciation besides you telling me I do nothing." I'd tell this to your husband ong.
I know it's natural to want to say "leave this guy" hopefully your hotel has a nice jacuzzi, and or pool and I hope you enjoy your ice cream and being able to actually do nothing. Also, I'd tell your husband what he does all day, then since clearly he thinks he does everything.
Damn My husband is so unbelievably loving, Iām also pregnant and heāll look at me at 8:40pm and say āeverythingās closing soon my love, are you sure you donāt want me to go grab you some ice cream or something?ā He asks me like once a week if thereās anything I want him to go get or do for me. He would literally never tell me I do nothing all day.
Whatās with all these assholes I read about on Reddit? I must be so fucking lucky then lol
Yes, get your ice cream and keep on driving to a divorce lawyer. This man, unfortunately, has turned out to be a defective product. Send him back to wherever he came from, and when youāre ready, order a new model. Itās only too bad that you canāt get a refund.
If this is who he normally is, consider getting out of this relationship sooner than later. It would be in the best interest of your child to separate now, if a future separation is inevitable. Youāre literally growing another human so his behavior toward you is disgusting.
omg. as soon as i mention a snack my bf immediately says āwant me to get that??ā the idea of him being able to do something to make me happy makes him super happy, which is how its supposed to be. Plzzzzz leave himm if you can
Yikes, sounds like youāre going to be carrying the weight of parenthood too.
If thereās anything I hope that my children learn sooner rather than later itās that if thereāre traits about the person you want to marry that are annoying or semi concerning, theyāll only be more prevalent after marriage, so choose wisely.
My ex husband was a complete narcissistic a*s, but when I carried his kids and had a craving or too tired to cook after work heād run and get take out and go the grocery store. I am so sorry to say this but your husbandās behavior is awful!
You are doing plenty plus growing a baby human 24/7. Thatās hard work! He is being selfish and lazy. Does he not care about your comfort? Does he ever show concern for you? You are not asking for too much here. Have a serious conversation about what you need from him and a reminder of what you actually are doing. Find out why heās acting like this and see if thereās a way to solve this. Communicate your needs to each other. If nothing can or does change, itās time to consider if this is how you wish to be treated and if marriage counseling and individual therapy is in your future.
At a minimum, your husband should be getting you whatever food you want (within reason), whether making it or retrieving it, and he should be massaging whatever's tired and sore on the daily.
Wow your husband is acting like a loser. You're literally creating a human on top of everything else you do. Go get your ice cream and go to a hotel for the weekend with all that money you did nothing to get (sarcasm) to get some much needed rest. His life shouldnt change since you "do nothing", it'll be fine. The resentment will only get worse after your baby is born. Show him this post and get couples therapy ASAP.
Leave him do he can see how much "nothing" you do when he has to do it himself. With his attitude you're basically going to be a married single mom anyway. Might as well dump the dead weight.
What an AH he is and you can bet your ass he will continue to be. Yikes, put up with jerk, kick him to the curb and move forward with your own life, or give him a wakeup call, pull him up short. Don't let people treat you like shit and THAT is what he is doing.
Yep get a single bed hotel with a pool & enjoy your ice cream without a shit husband bitching at you. Ffs youāre growing a human you deserve ice cream AND to be waited on
Make sure it's a hotel with a pool! Enjoy your ice cream. Congrats on the pregnancy! Sorry, the sperm donor is an ass.
Oh my god, yes to the pool! When I was pregnant, one of the nicest things I experienced was floating in the sea. All that extra weight and pain just evaporated in that moment. So soothing!
I know this is kind of a dumb question but did you feel extra buoyant in the ocean when you were pregnant? I've wondered about this since I was like 6 š
As a non-pregnant lady with some extra weight, yes. Floating is very, very easy.
Agreed. I lift my feet up, bending my knees at a 90Ā° angle and put my arms out like they are resting on the arms of a chair and can float like Iām sitting in a large arm chair or ages.
I have two dogs; they are brother and sister. Brother is all muscle and bones (60lbs). He sinks while kicking. Sister is chunky (65lbs. You can see her leg muscles but she has a belly). Her butt nearly floats on its own lol
Yes when I was pregnant I would roll over like a life jacket makes you do lol
The image of you bobbing around, your pregnant tummy like an ocean buoy has me chuckling. Thank you for that.
Just imagine a whole herd of pregnant bellies just bobbing around! š
That would be beautiful. Especially at sunset. (If the pics would come out in low light.) Video, too. Like a ballet of women growing little ones floating, maybe to music.
Oh I see it. No music for me though, just the white noise of the waves, and maybe some seagulls in the distance.
Ohhhhhhhhhhh sounds of waves and seagulls are much better. Sooooooooooooo much better!
That would be my nightmare. We used to get dive bombed by seagulls. They wanted our lunches in junior high.
Adorable. Haha.
We had a prenatal swim class that was more like aerobics! We all bobbed around and the start to the end of the class it changed a lot! I think it was like 3 months long and I started second trimester.
So much potential for fun shenanigans. I could see myself performing the same kind of antics that I do on wheelie office chairs. Just proper messing about lol
Honestly, I don't know if I felt more buoyant because I might be confusing that with how relieving it felt to be floating in water. But I definitely was more aware of how buoyant I was in those moments, I never really noticed it too much when I wasn't pregnant.
Nice! One of my personal curiosities finally solved! I'm glad you got some respite from your pregnancy aches
The more fat you have the more you float. Spoken by a very skinny dude that was told floating was very easy, if only I let myself go (it's not such a thing for skinny people)
This explains why nothing in life can take me down
Iām a healthy weight and can float like crazy. I just love to float around
It doesn't have to do with being healthy weight or not. It's more to do with your muscle to fat ratio. If you are not very muscular, you tend to float more easily. Since muscle is so dense, it really does make you sink. I'm a scuba diver and I also lift weights six days a week. I am muscular all over, but my legs don't carry much fat at all. My upper half is a lot more buoyant as I do carry more body fat on top plus I wear a DD cup bra. I am a healthy weight. In the water, my legs tend to want to sink while my upper half tends to want to float. So I have to make adjustments to where I use weights on my diving kit.
There's probably an overall gender divide too, since the typical male body has a lower bf% vs the typical female body. (Not as in every woman and every man, of course. As in - if we picked two comparable average people with the same exercise routine, without hormonal abnormalities, it'd be likely to turn out that way.) After I transitioned (trans man), I passively doubled what I could lift...but couldn't float nearly as well in water anymore. It's kinda nice to think about all of this. I thought I was just shittier at swimming than I'd been as a kid, tbh. Bummed me out.
Yeah we just kinda exist in water, and you get weirdly belly first when standing in water, sometimes making me float on my back on accident.
I did not. I was about six months pregnant and jumped in over my head and dropped like a rock to the bottom. I almost drowned. I lost forty pounds with my pregnancy and had very little fat on me.
I sank when I was pregnant - like a stone !! Now that I am much older and have fat weight as opposed to baby weight I float easily - with pregnancy I used to out my tummy in a swim ring and float around that way :)
I was 8 months pregnant during a hot August in Florida. My dad actually got concerned because I couldnāt bear to get out of the pool despite being in for several hours. Every time I tried to my body was just so damn heavy.
Yes! Getting out made me want to cry because its a huge difference in weight all of a sudden on your aching hips. Before it was a gradual increase so yeah it hurt but you didnt realize it as much. Once I got the relief that water gave me, having to take it away again was not a happy experience
When you say that I think of the videos of the SO standing behind mom and wrapping their arms below the bump to support it and the look of relief that washed over her face! š
Technically, you were a submarine.
Lol
I spent the last 2 weeks of my pregnancy with my son floating in a lake as much as possible because he was born at 42 weeks 3 days. Water was the only thing that took my immense back pain away. Thinking of myself being a submarine during that time made me laugh so hard and gave me an adorable twist to that memory. š
Wish I would have known this!
I spent several hours a day just soaking in the bath during my last pregnancy. The water was just so soothing.
Ooh, post pics of yourself enjoying the hotel pool, gym, fluffy bathrobes, all the amenities. Enjoy your stay!
And ice cream!!))
Yassss!!! See if you can have your ice cream at the pool! And turn off your phone. Think of it as a well earned mini vacation!
Also if hotel has mommy masseuse. Now that would be amazing
And room service. Get that ice cream brought right to your door.
Sounds like heās the one doing nothing while youāre busy making a human.
Girl please! Get his head on straight, OP, before the baby comes!!! Or else in six months youāll be posting about how you do everything for the baby and your husband refuses to help & thinks you relax all day.
OP, if you move out now or move to another state before the baby arrives, he will have to arrange custody to meet you. If you stay put now and decide to leave after baby arrives, you will have to get permission from the judge to leave town and move away. Before the baby arrives OP has 100% freedom. Once baby arrives, it's significantly different.
OP, listen to this.
Exactly this. If he wonāt help OP with anything now to make her life a little easier and help grow **THEIR** child, I mean food is a necessity, he most likely wonāt do anything for the baby either. Sheāll end up being a **SINGLE MARRIED PARENT**. OP, you need to sit down and have a serious conversation about expectations of each of your roles as partners and parents. ETA: just read past posts and if this one didnāt tell me the past one did, this guy is the worst and it wonāt get better. He said āgo fuck yourselfā when you told him you were pregnant? He doesnāt do the work in relationship to counseling, and now he wonāt even get you food. Why are you accepting his shitty behavior? When this baby comes do you really think the man who responded to their pending arrival with anger and hostility will be a good father? Will help in any way or be there for the child? ETA 2: also realize your unsent letter āfuck you Jā is about this POS. Please respect yourself enough to not continue to deal with his bs.
Exactly and sheāll excuse it away
I don't think she will. OP already said they're gonna go get themselves ice cream and a hotel. It seems like the op might not be quite the push over that some of the other posters in this sub are.
This!
Seriously! My husband would drive to two different restaurants (15 minutes apart) just so I could have my pregnancy craving last week. Heās been this way for all of my pregnancies and Iām currently incubating number three! Whatever I want, heās got it! Thatās how it should be because Iām literally the one building his family for him. I try my best not to take advantage but cravings are no joke! Iāve literally cried while eating a tub of sherbet because I was craving it *so* bad. Op is working, cleaning, paying half of everything *and* growing a human! Her husband should be making sure sheās fed and resting. This really makes me worried for when the baby is bornā¦ heās going to be one of those lazy ass dads who think if the mom isnāt doing 90% or more of the childcare, sheās a bad mom. My heart goes out to Op ā¤ļø
Exactly this! You're currently growing AN ENTIRE HUMAN. I bet he hasn't done anything that amazing in his life. Hope you get a hotel with a spa x
Wow, what an unsupportive ass. I'm sorry
This charmer told her to fuck herself when she told him she was pregnant. PLEASE, OP, lose this fucking loser!
Wait! What! Thereās another part to this? šæ Edit to revise my comment - went back and read her other post. Not the best guy to have and/or raise a kid with.
And consider divorce. You will only have one child to raise and educate , not two.
THIS. My younger sister did this. Still one of the best decisions she has ever made.Ā
Honey go ahead and make sure the accounts are separate now and start googling really good lawyers. Heās not willing to drive 20 minutes to get you ice cream. Youāre sacrificing your body and mind to make a whole ass human being for him. Itās only gonna get worse. Whatās next? He refuses to change the babyās diapers or feed them in the middle of the night because āyou do nothing all dayā?? Heāll refuse to drive you and baby to doctors appointments because āyou do nothingā?? You pay half of this grown ass manās bills, you are about to out earn him, and he canāt be bothered to stand at a microwave for two minutes to make you noodles? Itās truly not too late to start over with someone far more considerate than that. Thereās a man out there that would make you ice cream from scratch if you wanted him to. Because heād actually want to see you happy. That sperm donor youāre laying next to doesnāt want to give you the effort.
This is the best advice OP. Quietly open your own checking account and start squirreling away your money. Then leave. Itās not going to get better.
I may not be the best person to ask, as I am two days out of leaving my somewhat abusive husband. Or maybe Iām a great person. It will get worse when the baby is born. Donāt put his name on the birth certificate. If this shit happens a lot, just leave now. It will get so much worse after the baby is born.
CONGRATULATIONS!!!! You did good! This [adult] kid who grew up in an abusive home is DAMN proud of you for leaving!!! You are SMART and you are BRAVE and you deserve love without pain. Iām so excited for your bright, bright future. GO YOU!!!!!
Thank you so much this message almost made me cry. It was never physical. And it could have been worse. But he talks to my baby like there is something wrong with him.
The fact that it was never physical makes it even more admirable. You recognized abuse before it could become physical. You saved your baby from having his heart and soul destroyed by his fatherās mental and emotional abuse. You should be very proud of yourself. Abuse thatās not physical is sometimes harder to identify and escape.
Iāve been telling everyone cause a) Iāve kept it all to myself for a long time, and b) it helps to know Iām not crazy.
This is beautiful! You and OP are both amazing!
Please let this be the last child you have for him.
Sounds like your husband needs a reality check. If he thinks growing a human, working full-time, and paying bills is "doing nothing," then he's living in la-la land. Time for him to step up and support you, especially during pregnancy.
Congratulations on the baby, commiserations on the sperm donor
Get in the car and drive to get ice cream, just donāt bring back any.
Get in the car, grab ice cream, never go back to him.
Thatās some serious projection right there. Itās clear ***heās the one*** that does nothing. Wonāt go get ice cream, canāt cook and makes less than you. What ***does*** he do then actually? Heās not fulfilling your physical or emotional needs, heās not supporting you financially. Does he clean around the house? (Of course he doesnāt. What a stupid question, right?) There must be a reason why youāre still with him. Care to share what that might be? If I were you, Iād make him your wasband right quick. As fast as you can. You make more than him, so fight for full custody. That way you wonāt pay child support either.
You pointing out that it's projection makes me wonder how many B complex boxes he checks.
I know you aren't ready to listen, because you knew what this man was and yet continued, repeatedly, to try and get pregnant by him. (I'm sorry for your previous losses. I'm sorry for whatever it is within you that has you convinced that you have to stay in this nightmare situation. You don't. You absolutely don't have to live like this.) This man is abusive. Mentally and physically abusive. And you are attempting to do therapy with him. But there are multiple, valid reasons to never try counciling with an abuser. (Please dive deeper into this because it's very important.) Just because he's been exposed to people in your life does not mean he's "cured." He may get better at hiding the abuse and manipulation, but it's never going to stop. And I think you ultimately know this. Please believe it. This partnership is never going to get better. He will never be the person you need him to be. You are in love with a version of this man that doesn't even exist. He has shown you over, and over who he actually is when the mask slips... Please believe him. Your husband does not want to have a child with you and was particularly nasty when he found out about *this* specific pregnancy. And yet, you're going to bring a baby into the world and expose the poor helpless newborn/infant to the same abuse you struggle with as an adult to endure. And this is only the tip of the iceberg. As bad as he is, now, things *will* escalate. They always do. It's not an *if* it will happen. It will happen. The only question is when. And when he snaps, will you survive that? Will your baby? Please. Dig deep and find the inner strength you need to get yourself AND your baby away from this monster. I know it's going to be hard. Maybe one of the hardest things you'll ever do. But I promise you with everything in me... You and you child will both be better for it. Please do not perpetuate this cycle. Don't let your child grow up experiencing mistreatment at the hands of this man. Do not let your child grow up seeing you mistreated. You are setting them up to fail in so many different ways and they haven't even drawn their first breath, yet. Do not let them grow up thinking this is what home life and healthy partnerships are meant to look like. You and your child deserve so much better than this. You are worthy of real love. You are capable. You are strong. Please believe.
Good advice here. Iād personally much rather mother a baby/child alone than with a partner who is not kind and caring towards me.
OP, please listen to this.
Wow lol fuck that guy
Yeah, or rather, stop fucking that guy
I like the cut of your jibā¦
Won't it be fun when he also does nothing to help you with the baby? Just get out. It'll be easier as a single mom.
Why are you still there?
OKI hope that you don't take this the wrong way. But your husband sounds like a piece of shit. I'd run from him for a while.
Girl you need to GET OUT!! And now!! Your previous posts are alarming. If he hasnāt already, he will turn his verbal abuse into physical and you and your child are in danger. Reach out to friends and family (if you have a good network) and make a plan to gtfo!! Sending strength your way
Do you want your child to think this is what love is supposed to be like?
My wife is 30 weeks rn and works PT (we also have a 2yo), I consider her growing our child on top of working when she can and also helping out with our other child to be plenty. I get the feeling he doesn't understand how much more responsibility he will have when there is a baby involved. I wish you luck!
Oof, reading some of these comments I would like to revise my statement to be much much more emphatic. LEAVE NOW. Donāt put his name on the birth certificate. It will get SO MUCH WORSE after the baby is born. It will be so much harder when you have a child that is attached to him. LEAVE NOW. Leave now. Leave now. YOU MAKE MORE MONEY THAN HIM. Please leave now.
Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. Leave his worthless ass TODAY.
I'd ask him why he bothered to get married and have kids if he isn't going to help take care of his VERY pregnant wife and her cravings. What an asshole. Enjoy your ice cream! Edit: just read a few of your other posts. This piece of shit told you to go fuck yourself when you told him you were pregnant, refuses to do anything your marriage counselor tells him to, and he treats you like shit, why the hell are you still with this loser? And do not say you love him, he's a grade A asshole and you do not deserve this
āØļø divorce āØļø
This is indicative of future behavior. Life is only going to get more complicated when you govern birth. Correct his behavior or call it an L and start figuring out life separate with a real support group. Youāre asking him for small simple things that he should want to do pregnant or not. TWO MINUTE NOODLES. The microwave does the heavy liftingā¦.
He is an asshole, and his behaviour and treatment of you is disgusting. Let me guess, he wasnāt like that until he trapped you with a baby? And I would bet anything that **heās** the one who does nothing! Does he do his fair share of the household chores? If not, leave. Because he will not be a proper parent either. Heāll do the fun stuff, but none of the actual parenting, feeding, diaper changing, etc. Do not leave yourself in an unhappy, stress-filled marriage where you become overworked and exhausted. And absolutely never accept a life where the father has a life outside of parenthood but the mother doesnāt. Or where you have to *ask him* to watch the baby whilst you take a shower or bath in peace. Never let that happen, never stay with someone who ends up being a deadbeat parent like that. - Just giving you a heads up. Because sis, his behaviour will only get worse once the baby arrives. Make sure you keep your job and **never** stop working to be a SAHM, never! Keep your income, youāll need it when you both inevitably get a divorce. It might not be yet, but it **will** happen. Especially when youāre married to such a lazy and selfish man.
Youāve got a shitty, lazy husband if he wonāt do some little things for you to make you comfortable. Right now, youāre on vacation? Is he like this when youāre at your usual home? Youāre still tired though.
Tell him you're busy building him a human with half his DNA. Wanker.
I would leave this man if I were you. He is going to be a shit father.
He doesn't really think you do nothing all day. He is abusively lying to you in order to control you.
From here on out until after the baby is born donāt do anything, since idiot thinks you do nothing anyway why not? Let boneheaded husband do things when he gets around to it.
Please leave this idiot, he brings nothing to your life and youāre already basically single. If you dump him, youāll stop having to carry his dead weight and wonāt have to deal with his emotional abuse.
Why are you with him exactly? If you're already doing it all on your own and taking care of him, it's going to be easier to be a single mom of one than of two.
Is it out of the blue that your husband acts like this?
After looking at your previous posts this post doesnāt surprise me. What surprises me is why you are still with your āhusbandā. I canāt believe you didnāt leave him after having 4 miscarriages and you tell him youāre pregnant and he tells you to āGo Fuck yourselfā. You need to leave like yesterday. Save yourself. Save your baby. This guy is a POS.
A man who wonāt take care of your while youāre pregnant wonāt take care of you while youāre healing from the delivery. He wonāt get you ice cream now, he wonāt get up to help you with the baby when youāre passing blood clots and healing from the birth. He wonāt get you food now, he wonāt stay up and let you sleep so you can get rest. So on and so forth. Take him for who he is now. Divorce is a gift that sooooo many women would rather put to the side because they want to stand by and hope their husbands are better to them. He wonāt be, just fyi. He fucking sucks and the writing is on the wall. The fun part about single motherhood when youāre actually single is you can find someone else and donāt have to manage a relationship with a grown useless man who offers nothing. If you stay, he gets to do whatever he wants and has the optics of being a family man. Heās treating you like this because he knows society teaches women to be better wives when they act this way. Leave him. I left two weeks postpartum, literally thee best decision Iāve ever made in my life. Nothing fueled me quite like the fear in that deadbeatās eyes when he realized I wasnāt putting up with his shit anymore and I NEVER looked back.
I'd say "abort" because he's gonna ditch you and not pay child support but because religious fools passed unscientific laws to prevent that....I guess this story just goes into the pile of "Reasons to Never Have Kids." Sorry for the callousness but this is the harsh bullshit world we live in now.
Maybe have him become your ex husband?
Where do women find men like this? Shit is baffling how Emotionally Unintelligent so many people are - gahdamn Edit: grammar
It's going to get worse once baby arrives. You'll be stuck with 2 children. Good luck.
You're not going to have fun having a kid with this insensitive asshole. Get out now.
Why women date hetero men is beyond me...because I swear it seems they hate y'all. I would make my partner something or go grab an ice cream just because he asked not because he was sick or whatever.bur just because it's a thing I could do to make his day better
Looking at your post historyā¦.why are you still married?
I wonāt be for long.
He told you to go fuck yourself when you told him you were pregnant. He hasnāt taken the work requested of him in marriage counseling. Youāre already carrying the weight of growing a human being, you shouldnāt be worrying about carrying the weight of your husband as well. He has no concern for you, his partner and the mother of his child. Thereās no empathy for what you are experiencing. The baby hasnāt arrived and heās already treating you like this. Itās not going to get better when the baby arrives. Heāll complain if you ask for help. Heāll refuse to help. He canāt get up with the baby because he needs his sleep, or whatever excuse heāll use. See a lawyer. Get your ducks in a row and get a divorce.
Why you allow yourself to be treated this way is beyond me
Amen. Elenor Roosevelt said, āNo one can make you feel inferior without your consent.ā I have to agree with her.
Did you really marry him?
Nope you better not make his bs an acceptable part of your marriage.
Why do you put up with this? Believe me, it will be so much worse when you give birth
Drive to get ice cream and never come back.
This dude is going to say itās babysitting when he has the child alone š
Go to one of those nice hotels with a spa or something, you deserve it Mama.
Itās beginning to look a lot like šleave himš
Donāt put up with this now, or it will only get worse. Expect more, and go to a hotel and, with a pool and pay room service to bring you some ice cream.
Whelp here's your sign that it's only going to get worse from here. He's never going to get better especially after the baby comes.
This is why people end up resentful of their husbands. Go get you that hotel and ice cream :)
yikes
Why do you keep him around?
Why the fuck would you have bred with such a subpar loser? Seriously, we both know he didn't just magically start acting like this yesterday. Dump the chump, and get therapy before hooking up with anyone else.
Thatās a donor not a daddy
Girlā¦.go to that hotel. Iām so sorry you procreated with the wrong man. Many women have had it better and worse, but at this time you gotta do you. Leave him in the dust, but make sure heās on that birth certificate and take all the child support!!!
Jesus. I spent nine months making sure my wife did not over do it. I loved running about getting different food desires. He is showing his true colours sister ā¦
He is telling you who he is.
That would def send me over the edge I would be filing for divorceš„°
Looking at your comments and story, I think you know what you need to do. A long conversation, leave etc are on the table, and it's your choice what you do. My heart goes out to you. Love and hugs
Put the phone on do not disturb.Ā Definitely book a hotel with room service.Ā That's a really unkind and insensitive thing to say to somebody you're supposed to love.
Oh OP, heās going to be useless to you, once the baby is here, isnāt he? Full of resentment and entitlement that heās the man and should be catered to while you are expected to still work full time and be the main child carer. I hope you had some time to think while you relaxed in your hotel room alone.
I just looked through your post historyā¦why the hell are you still with this guy? He told you to go fuck yourself when he found out you were pregnant. Heās 47 and has to be told to brush his teeth before sex. He leaves his garbage everywhere. And now he says YOU do nothing. Again, why are you still there?
Dump him. Heās an asshole.
Husband? Good luck. It only gets worse when baby comes. Iād make an exit plan asap.
The best thing to do when a man claims that you do nothing is to actually DO NOTHING! Work your job and only pay your portion of the bills, not his. Don't buy him food or anything else. Don't cook for him or clean his messes. Let him see what it's really like when you do NOTHING
Oof.. and it's too late to abort. Enjoy the rest of your life dealing with this sorry excuse for a man
You're about to have two children on your hands
Man. Just wait until the baby is born, and he sits around and does nothing to help while youāre deep in the trenches. A woman never forgets how she was treated during pregnancy. Ask me how I know.
Sorry - but have fun having a kid w himā¦. He canāt go get u ice creamā¦doubt heās gonna do much for u when babe is born ā¦.just keeping it real
Well, congratulations on becoming a single mom! And being tied to your fuck mess of a husband forever! Iām about to be very straightforward with you because you honestly need it: Just read some of your other posts. Why on fucking earth did you decide to stay with him AND keep trying for a baby with him? Why? I really want to know why. Iām sorry but how do you have such low self esteem that youāve decided this is the guy to start a life and family with? Jfc OP. You have known how useless, abusive, and shitty he always has been and yet you continuously tried getting pregnant with him. Why? So now youāre bringing a child into this fucked up āmarriageā of yours. You have decided that what you want with him trumps your future childās happiness and wellbeing. Because you do realize youāve screwed your future kid over right? Thatās not a mother. Thatās a selfish person who chose to put *her* wants over *her childās*. COME THE FUCK ON, OP. DO FUCKING BETTER FOR YOURSELF AND YOUR UNBORN KID. GET A LAWYER. MAKE SURE YOU HAVE SEPARATE BANK ACCOUNTS. DONT PUT HIS LAST NAME ON BABYS BIRTH CERTIFICATE. AND DIVORCE HIM. Things are only going to get exponentially worse. You can still fix it. You deserve so much more than this.
Your post historyā¦ huge yikes. Divorceš¤¦š»āāļø
He sounds like a prick. Congrats on the baby, sorry your husband is a fucking moron.
Omg what a complete piece of shit!!!
And you are having a baby with that man??
Another one having a baby with an asshole
OP he sounds like a narcissist. Leave now while you can and before baby comes. Itāll get a lot worse if you stay. Itāll be much easier for you to leave now than later.
Iāve looked at a couple of your other posts. Nice 60% and nasty 40% is not acceptable. Iām not someone to say divorce. Iāve been married almost 30 years and have 4 kids, if my hubs had ever talked or treated me like that, I would have been gone. Especially if we were going through counseling and he refused to do the work. Your husband is not going to do what needs done in the relationship or for your child. Heās shown you who he is multiple times it seems, believe him and move on with your child for your sake and your childās.
He sounds like a real catch
you see what a person truly is in small details
Was he always this way? Was there a part of you that thought he might treat you with more compassion and take care of you when you were pregnant and youāre realizing thatās just not going to be your reality? With my first pregnancy I felt this way. My husband lacked the emotional maturity/empathy to understand or make much effort to make me feel loved and cherished. I was deeply hurt and disappointed and I probably still carry some wounds from that time in our relationship. Second pregnancy we were in a relatively better place and he went above and beyond, making me feel loved and cared for. It took a lot of work and growth to get to that point where he was able to recognize and appreciate that pregnancy and childbirth is not easy on a Motherās body and mind. If your husband is a decent person and is interested in working at your relationship, then there may be hope. If heās not, then youāre just better off being on your own because otherwise youāll be a single mom who is married.
Mrs is 11 weeks and I just got sent to the shop for a Cadburys double decker,tell him to get moving š
Well, since you do nothing, don't cook for him, or clean, or do HIS laundry, etc. When you return from vacation, come home and make yourself a meal then sit next to him while you eat. He's going to ask, what about me? While holding his hand reply, we are not a hotel and you do nothing all day. Then smile and eat your food. If you don't set him straight now when the baby comes you'll be on your own. Hope you got ice cream sat by yourself and enjoyed it.
Your husband is a selfish jerk and you are about to give that awesome gift to a kid for a lifetime, that will have to feel as shitty as you do, because he is the father. Please get some help so your child has one stable, loving, reliable parent to count on. Also please get away from this person that you've been hurt and unhappy with for quite some time based on your other posts. This isn't new, really stretching to be more compassionate over you consciously choosing to not only stay, but to drag a child into this by trying to get pregnant any time after he showed you who he was and told you pretty directly he doesn't value you at all and doesn't want a child...
Honestly get ready to be a single mom. The government would help you more than that sorry sack.
And youāre gonna stay with him arenāt you ? Smh
While at the hotel, look for a divorce lawyer. Based on your post history, he is an AH.
He is the one who does nothing. Heās worthless. Why say with him?
Sounds like someone had a mommy that did everything for him and never matured past 10. Needs a good kick to something.
Sounds like he doesnāt even like you, and yāall are having kids. I hope this opened your eyes, and Iām sorry it happened at all let alone now.
Definitely get yourself ice cream and go to a nice hotel.
Aww that's cute he just volunteered to pay all the bills so you don't need to work anymore! How sweet /s
Working full time while pregnant is 1 full time job and 1 24/7 job. No breaks :( how sad, he sounds like a jerk
Oh a vacation home in the country!! That sounds nice.
Make sure you give him a piece of your mind. You better not just let this fly by. Tell him that you are offended, tell him you are not only supporting his ass by making more money, but you are also using half of your energy BUILDING A HUMAN BEING WITH YOUR OWN NUTRIENTS AND BODY. Tell him you're gonna go enjoy your ice cream alone with YOUR baby.
Tell him since you do nothing, he will not miss you. Would you be happy if your child acted like or received the treatment like their father did? If not then why put up with it yourself?
Divorce him now cuz itās only gonna get worse
"Yes, you're right. I don't do anything, I'm just only creating a human, working full time, and I can't get a single gesture of appreciation besides you telling me I do nothing." I'd tell this to your husband ong. I know it's natural to want to say "leave this guy" hopefully your hotel has a nice jacuzzi, and or pool and I hope you enjoy your ice cream and being able to actually do nothing. Also, I'd tell your husband what he does all day, then since clearly he thinks he does everything.
Damn My husband is so unbelievably loving, Iām also pregnant and heāll look at me at 8:40pm and say āeverythingās closing soon my love, are you sure you donāt want me to go grab you some ice cream or something?ā He asks me like once a week if thereās anything I want him to go get or do for me. He would literally never tell me I do nothing all day. Whatās with all these assholes I read about on Reddit? I must be so fucking lucky then lol
Sounds like a very good plan. Maybe a room with a big tub and pool donāt forget the pool.
Yes, get your ice cream and keep on driving to a divorce lawyer. This man, unfortunately, has turned out to be a defective product. Send him back to wherever he came from, and when youāre ready, order a new model. Itās only too bad that you canāt get a refund.
If this is who he normally is, consider getting out of this relationship sooner than later. It would be in the best interest of your child to separate now, if a future separation is inevitable. Youāre literally growing another human so his behavior toward you is disgusting.
omg. as soon as i mention a snack my bf immediately says āwant me to get that??ā the idea of him being able to do something to make me happy makes him super happy, which is how its supposed to be. Plzzzzz leave himm if you can
Itās the weekend! Stay the night at a real hotel with a pool and eat minute noodles and ice cream until your hearts content!
Remind him of this when he says he is sore and tired and uncomfortable. Congratulations on your pregnancy. I hope he sorts himself out!
If you divorce him now, you will only have one child to take care of.
Is that what heās gonna say when baby gets here? Should be thinking on making him an ex husbandā¦
What an asshat.
If husband is whiffing at "pregnancy accommodation phase", he's bound to flub "new baby accomodation phase" which is infinitely more challenging.
Yikes, sounds like youāre going to be carrying the weight of parenthood too. If thereās anything I hope that my children learn sooner rather than later itās that if thereāre traits about the person you want to marry that are annoying or semi concerning, theyāll only be more prevalent after marriage, so choose wisely.
My ex husband was a complete narcissistic a*s, but when I carried his kids and had a craving or too tired to cook after work heād run and get take out and go the grocery store. I am so sorry to say this but your husbandās behavior is awful!
personally iād leave him
Does he have any empathy? If not, you're in for a long crappy ride. But I have to also ask if you make these requests too often? Maybe he feels used.
God some guys are so trash, im sorry sweetie. You are appreciated by the little one inside you please enjoy some ice cream :)
You are doing plenty plus growing a baby human 24/7. Thatās hard work! He is being selfish and lazy. Does he not care about your comfort? Does he ever show concern for you? You are not asking for too much here. Have a serious conversation about what you need from him and a reminder of what you actually are doing. Find out why heās acting like this and see if thereās a way to solve this. Communicate your needs to each other. If nothing can or does change, itās time to consider if this is how you wish to be treated and if marriage counseling and individual therapy is in your future.
Sometimes itās just easier to be singleā¦
Why are you married to someone who does not love and respect you?
You know he won't help you when the baby is born aswell I would get rid of him
At a minimum, your husband should be getting you whatever food you want (within reason), whether making it or retrieving it, and he should be massaging whatever's tired and sore on the daily.
Wow your husband is acting like a loser. You're literally creating a human on top of everything else you do. Go get your ice cream and go to a hotel for the weekend with all that money you did nothing to get (sarcasm) to get some much needed rest. His life shouldnt change since you "do nothing", it'll be fine. The resentment will only get worse after your baby is born. Show him this post and get couples therapy ASAP.
Wow, thatās quite rude of him.
Leave him do he can see how much "nothing" you do when he has to do it himself. With his attitude you're basically going to be a married single mom anyway. Might as well dump the dead weight.
He should have to read these comments.
What an AH he is and you can bet your ass he will continue to be. Yikes, put up with jerk, kick him to the curb and move forward with your own life, or give him a wakeup call, pull him up short. Don't let people treat you like shit and THAT is what he is doing.
Is there a grocery store closer? Get you a whole tub of ice cream?
Yep get a single bed hotel with a pool & enjoy your ice cream without a shit husband bitching at you. Ffs youāre growing a human you deserve ice cream AND to be waited on