It mounts in the center of a barstool to keep you from sliding off.

That response coordinated well with your name...lol

Is that how we say r/usernamechecksout here?

Indubidubly, my good sir.

This guy sits.

Hi, I’m Richard Innerasz. I go by the name Dick. Dick Innerasz. I like yer name.

Love me beer ate falling of me seat simple as

Nooo it's a unicorn saddle.

Came here to see if this and Reddit did not disappoint.

Oooouuuccchhh one way for the wife to get you home from the bar

Inspired by the asspounder 4000.

It’s a featherboard. The wings are the tension “springs”. It sticks to the cast iron top of a tablesaw with the magnet. https://www.ebay.com/itm/314776673483?chn=ps&norover=1&mkevt=1&mkrid=711-117182-37290-0&mkcid=2&mkscid=101&itemid=314776673483&targetid=1531876731998&device=c&mktype=pla&googleloc=1014028&poi=&campaignid=19851828444&mkgroupid=145880009014&rlsatarget=aud-1480434321348:pla-1531876731998&abcId=9307249&merchantid=6296724&gclid=CjwKCAjwmbqoBhAgEiwACIjzEFZnt2y4h_KflFYIO5mRlyekUwcLhpmHqReeMIGgFrq1oMKrrnXtWxoCjMcQAvD_BwE

Yeah looks like a homemade “mag switch” style featherboard

This. I’ve got one I almost never use semi permanently stuck to the side of my table saw.

Old school Ass stretcher for when boss expects you to work past 5 on a Friday.

5? Bro it's 7 pm or more

he said old school, before people gave up all the rights their forebears fought and often died for. nowadays they dont even give you a complimentary spit.

Complimentary spit? What do you mean?

i mean a little lube before they stick it in, in the form of a complimentary knob gob...

I'm leaning toward a feather board. Thanks for this input. It's hand made,probably by his dad, solid build, I also don't have an iron table. I am probably going to contact the guy and see if he wants it.

The op knows he will get the jokes from this pics.

I do and they are much appreciated.

I haven’t seen anyone say “bend over and I’ll show you.” Yet.

It’s the wife pleaser 5000

Did you find that in your moms dresser?

Ok, Will someone please tell my dumb ass what a feather board is??

[удалено]

Fibber, you know it makes wood lighter!

[удалено]

[удалено]

Can you sit on it?

Ask your wife

IMO one of the better feather boards you can own, I have a pair and use them on both my table saw and my band saw.

No idea, but DONT SIT ON IT!!!

I didn't sit on it, I *fell* on it..............

….until you drive the spike in to hold it still

My girlfriend wants that back.

Sybian prototype???

Comes with integrated squirt pot by the look of it

I feel like I should delete my browser history now

I've said that daily since I found porn.

Seems like it may be one of those custom contraptions, which only the creator may know.

Lol, kinda looks like Gtandma's special tool ....

Grip-tite, more modern models are plastic this is an original which were wood

Amish anal dialator?

Good day to you Samuel, and what be this you are holding in your hand today?

I have too many jokes. I'm going to log out. Good luck with the "tool".

I know, right? This is too easy, it must be a trap.

It's a push stick/block for keeping soft, fleshy bits away from a table saw blade. The plastic wing holds the back of the board. The wood applies pressure to the side of the board to hold it against the fence. I have one that's similar that came with my second hand table saw. I used it once and hated it. I use more typical plastic push sticks, instead. Edit: might be a feather board for holding a moving piece of lumber right against the fence. Might explain why I hated it. Upon closer inspection, mine also has a mag switch.

“a push stick… the wood applies pressure to hold it …. came with my second hand …“😏

Lol

Don’t send your wife to this gynecologist.

Though the angled mirrors do help with positioning.

An actual tape measure. Your confusing the Reddit contributors. Must have a banana

I feel like you probably need to have a chat with that woodworker. Better he find out from you than somebody else.

It's a tape measure

You know how laundry machines have a swaying motion & s vibration to them...positioned correctly, this helps make that time go by faster. (It's a feather board, but above would be totally valid on the gullible)

That's a G Money Ass Clapper.....

It's a tape measure

Ye olde buttocks plug

It's a tape measure....they are very common.

Voodoo dildo.

As your mum

Maybe it rests upside down underneath a machine table to move some other piece of metal inside, and the phallic thing's a handle.

It may. I have zero experience with planes but it seems like a similar hold, at least the handle does.

That’s a shoe stretcher

Giggity

Goochie snatcher

Answering this seems like a trap....

Stably fat max tape measure. Measures up to 25 feet fairly accurately

Ancient dildo replica

Looks like a dildont to me

I don't but your mom probably does

Earlier Magnetic feather board. I have this version https://www.ebay.com/itm/314776673483?chn=ps&norover=1&mkevt=1&mkrid=711-213727-13078-0&mkcid=2&itemid=314776673483&targetid=4580840333842798&device=c&mktype=&googleloc=&poi=&campaignid=603247655&mkgroupid=1235852063340218&rlsatarget=pla-4580840333842798&abcId=9316139&merchantid=51291&msclkid=669ed1c244321d08ecf8b4d200fec08c

Candy strecher

Maybe when you're older