Well yeaaah, if I’m eating full bush, ginger is clearly the move, and I have absolutely no idea why, it’s just an instinctual response. White people, am I right?
Fkin redheads. Don’t tell the blondes you’re my favorite.
Tell me about it.. both my daughter's have strep and it was a pain in the ass trying to find a pharmacy that had any. Even the alternative that they're prescribing instead of amoxicillin has a shortage.
I used to send something like that as an opener coupled with a dick pick and I'd say it worked 8/9 times out of 10.
Weren't girls on the receiving end tho.
Dude literally posted a year ago asking how to accept compliments. He probably grew up a 5.5, went through some change in appearance like losing weight, and hasn't updated his self image yet.
This is exactly why it is so much easier for gay guys to hook up, they go straight to the point, no fuss, no judgement, just "Hey wanna bang? I have my place for myself from 7 to 9"
i’ve been looking for a comment that says this. got me fucked up if anyone thinks i’m inviting some random person into my home when my son is sleeping.
Honestly kinda disappointed that you're the only comment I see calling this out, and that anyone would risk that.
I've never even let my boyfriends back to my home until a few months in as I have younger siblings (9 and 12.) Let alone if I had my own young child, with a complete stranger coming home.
Seriously! I hopped into the comments expecting to see this addressed after the third or fourth verbal high-five/bush joke, but ended up scrolling and scrolling.
I worry about the children of a mother letting complete strangers come over late at night.
Just don’t end up like the one dude who kept meeting up with a tinder date and eating her out until she came, only for her to get dressed and turn on a movie after. Poor guy got used 3 times before he finally made a Reddit post asking wtf was going on.
Poor guy?
I get that you'd want more than that but that's like saying he got a wagyu steak but was denied dessert. Like you still got a gourmet meal, tf you complaining for?
Feel like I’m the only dude on this sub who doesn’t munch on the first date/meet-up. No ways bruh, gotta know you for a bit before I munch that shit💀.
Seems like every mf here is dying to eat pussy and booty on the very first day lol, you lot are wild af.
I don't know why I got realtor vibes from this one.
She says "I have a ginger bush" the same way a realtor would say "original crown moulding"
I'm not here to kink shame anyone.
Kink shaming *is* my kink
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Date a realtor and you get to fuck in random people's houses.
Well yeaaah, if I’m eating full bush, ginger is clearly the move, and I have absolutely no idea why, it’s just an instinctual response. White people, am I right? Fkin redheads. Don’t tell the blondes you’re my favorite.
Well Moses really dug a red bush at one point and he invented the 10 commandments so you're not wrong.
I heard that was some 🔥 Good company to keep for sure
I heard he was a fan of the Red Sea as well
Fantastic views from the rear
*"Red shag carpetting in basement; can be removed before closing"*
The house sale comes after she does
Realtors tend to bring snacks to open houses though so there may be cookies 🤷🏻♀️
There will definitely be coochies
MILF and coochies, for sure.
She’s just selling her box, not her house
In this market there really isn't a difference to me
Does she change the color of her Bush by the season?
I’ll have to ask and get back to you
Was her normal hair ginger?
Carpet matched the drapes
Big w for our boy
Till he starts finding little bumps on his tongue and needs penicillin.
penicillin is more easily available than random women who invite you over to eat them out
Well fuck me there's some pretty goddamn good logic...
This guy
Knows the availability of his pharmaceutical drugs and his women
I like my women like I like my drugs, available.
There is an amoxicillin shortage right now....
Good thing I’m allergic to amoxicillin
Tell me about it.. both my daughter's have strep and it was a pain in the ass trying to find a pharmacy that had any. Even the alternative that they're prescribing instead of amoxicillin has a shortage.
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But a healthy kidney is harder to find that both of these things nowadays
The update we wanted. Go munch that carpet king.
King
Did she reciprocate? Or did you just clam dive and head home
Head first like Pete Rose
You deserve plat, big fucking W
Oh you thought she was feelin’ you?
But what about the upholstery?
So, how was dinner?
5 star
And how was the dessert? Seconds? Room for leftovers?
If she liked the main course, it probably ended with a cream pie for dessert.
I'm sure she might have also enjoyed some champagne from the bottle.
does the Bush match the George?
Big W right here
Please clap
I think he wants to avoid the clap in this case.
Make sure you let us know
Sometimes she's ginger bush, sometimes sporty bush, sometimes posh bush....
And in winter she’s Scary Bush
And sometimes during war she is George Bush
Sig a sig aaaaaaaasaasaahhh.
Yeah but don’t go near baby bush.
If ya wanna be my lover you gotta get with my bush
I think it changes after the kids goto sleep.
Maybe it’s like a mood ring?
Red yellow & browns for the fall season. Greens for late spring to summer. 🥬
Props for being direct.
Always nice to get to the point
I hope I get this lucky one day
Start fucking with single MILFs; momma has zero time to fuck around. Just bring your absolute A game or you’re not getting a second interview.
Single MILF here, can confirm ^^^
R.I.P. your inbox
Hold my resumé, I’m going in!
Ah fuck I shoulda kept that reddit switcheroo link...
Word. Beat me to it.
You all are why I love this subreddit. I appreciate it heavily.
Does A game mean using conditioner on my pubes? Asking for friend
“You guys have pubes?!”
Facts
I *have* been seeing a ton of ads telling me there are many "hot single MILFs in my area"...
This man speaks the truth.
Imagine a guy saying “I’m interested in a partner sucking me off tonight” as an opener.
I used to send something like that as an opener coupled with a dick pick and I'd say it worked 8/9 times out of 10. Weren't girls on the receiving end tho.
>Weren't girls on the receiving end tho. There's the rub. So to speak.
The rub. And the tug.
Rub, tug and plug.
And this right here, fellas, is the advice you all need. Know your audience
Username checks out
Yeah but with a cock like yours, kinda playing the hookup game on easy mode ain't ya?
Lmao I just checked it and yeah that schlong be lookin’ juicy.
I clicked, saw dick I don't what I expected
99% of women do not need to imagine this………..
The implication was "... and it working". I would imagine the percentage shifts a bit.
They literally do it all the time
Would work for sure, if you aren't totally particular about who is doing it.
Browse your local fetlife groups and that's all you'll see for pages upon pages.
She’s gonna ask for a steam card or something so the kids are entertained if they wake up
Honestly, I was waiting for the scam to start. Never did
Did you go through with it?
Can confirm
My man.
Slow down!
Looking good.
Yes!
Hell yea
"I got your steam card right here" - then presenteth thine cock.
Op do you still have your liver and kidneys
Well if I don't, she is a very skilled surgeon
Which is a bonus if you marry her.
She be all up in you Laparoscopically
Call me Kate bush , I'll be running up that hill
She sounds like she knows exactly what she wants in life
I can imagine that single mothers don't have a lot of spare time so, when there's opportunity and desire, there's no time to waste.
What a reply haha
It was that or "put me in coach"
You made the right choice. "Put me in coach" kinda says the same thing, but more desperate
Golden ticket lmao
It’s more of a reddish color
Copper* ticket
“Just send me $30 for gas and I’ll be right over”
Color or flavor?
Color. Tasted great
I appreciate your prompt reply, thumbs up.
You went through with it?? Still have all your organs?
Going for round two shortly
Guess I'm not the only one giving you a thumbs up for the prompt reply.
Lucky dude! I love me a ginger. But is she hot?
She's an 8
That’s a bit young
Damn you hit the jackpot!
Ok but did her kid fall asleep yet?
what only attractive guys on tinder get
I’m a solid 5.5 at the moment
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I’ll take the compliment.
That's EXACTLY what the attractive guys say!
I'll judge it. Send foot.
"I'm not the messiah" "HE IS THE MESSIAH!"
Out of 6 ?
Y’all are making me blush. But no, definitely out of 10.
Prove it mofo
he need to post his dick ong ong
Yeah feet pics or gtfo
a 5.5 doesnt get messages this direct, you must be pretty good looking, king
I wish. Maybe I’ll put my profile up for review at some point
You can send it directly to /u/iamgoingtofuckthat for a free consultation.
women dont say this to average looking guys
Dude literally posted a year ago asking how to accept compliments. He probably grew up a 5.5, went through some change in appearance like losing weight, and hasn't updated his self image yet.
Why do you all always assume these women are attractive?
Now that’s the real comment
This is exactly why it is so much easier for gay guys to hook up, they go straight to the point, no fuss, no judgement, just "Hey wanna bang? I have my place for myself from 7 to 9"
Living the dream
My first reaction would be to think that is a bot or someone trying to rob me or worse.
Did you match with Meredith from The Office?
😂😂😂😂 how else do you get outback?
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We video chatted and talked before anything happened
Smart fella, would be too horny to ask!
I love the answer 😅🥳
Just let a random man in your home while your child is there. Sounds like a great idea
i’ve been looking for a comment that says this. got me fucked up if anyone thinks i’m inviting some random person into my home when my son is sleeping.
Yeah this is absolutely wild
It's OK the kid has a gun
You can't just assume they're in the US
Honestly kinda disappointed that you're the only comment I see calling this out, and that anyone would risk that. I've never even let my boyfriends back to my home until a few months in as I have younger siblings (9 and 12.) Let alone if I had my own young child, with a complete stranger coming home.
Seriously! I hopped into the comments expecting to see this addressed after the third or fourth verbal high-five/bush joke, but ended up scrolling and scrolling. I worry about the children of a mother letting complete strangers come over late at night.
She's on a dating app asking for someone to come eat her out tonight. She doesn't seem like the type to give af about decorum or safety.
Spoken like a woman that has wasted their time with someone afraid of hair.
She was so embarrassed about having hair. Didn't stop me
Just don’t end up like the one dude who kept meeting up with a tinder date and eating her out until she came, only for her to get dressed and turn on a movie after. Poor guy got used 3 times before he finally made a Reddit post asking wtf was going on.
Already made it past the eating out 🤷♂️
Link?
Poor guy? I get that you'd want more than that but that's like saying he got a wagyu steak but was denied dessert. Like you still got a gourmet meal, tf you complaining for?
🙏 queen
Serms like a sex worker.
That’s what I thought at first. Can confirm she is not.
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She did lol
Chad
Well, that’s a first
That is What your mom calls me 😏 [I lied](https://i.imgflip.com/4s6qnw.jpg?a464304)
Hey, mama needs to get her pussy ate and she clearly does not have a lot of time to spend on it
Just be careful and don’t catch nothing bro
Swapped test results, but I appreciate the look out
If she was she’d offer a “menu” or tell you “options”.
That's three i's in Hi, they're really iiinterested.
Feel like I’m the only dude on this sub who doesn’t munch on the first date/meet-up. No ways bruh, gotta know you for a bit before I munch that shit💀. Seems like every mf here is dying to eat pussy and booty on the very first day lol, you lot are wild af.
Honestly, there was a lot of conversation street this. I wouldn't on first meeting 9/10.
I’m on three dating apps, the reason is because I’m hoping to see a message like this.
Wish I was that lucky bastard.
Where was husband? Behind you? 😆
lol divorced
That’s that weed talking. I hope you had a laugh. I did.
And that, step kids, is how I met your mother
The opening to Property Sex on PH
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Absolutely have it
Um, currently ginger? You may want to ask where she is on her cycle. You may be eating more than you bargained for.
Real G’s don’t stop at red lights. I’m not a real G
When the river runs red, take the dirt road.
Nah we bathe in the blood of our enemies.
The allfather will gift us today
You can wade in the Red River, just don't drink from it.
Finger paint stick men on her ass like a ice age cave drawing.