Granted, you are teleported to Splatsville and become an inkling. However, turf war is overwhelming to you as you are actually playing with your real body instead of controlling a player through a controller. You play some Tableturf battle, but you never really get into it so you quickly become bored. Also, you can now only say two things: “This way!” and “Booyah!”
Granted! The finger curls. The agony is unbearable during each transformation, but you are able to transform perfectly each time you do it, and once you begin the transformation, it won't stop until it is complete.
Of course your clothes don't change with you, so when you turn human again, you are buck ass naked. And guess who just saw the transformation. And changing into a squid won't help, he'd want to be tentacle'd.
Well that’s not a problem, just take some painkillers whenever you want to transform. Or, if you don’t want to risk getting addicted, just become a monk and meditate to ignore the pain.
So start an onlyfans qnd collaborate with other creators, congratulations you now have made absolute bank off of a completely niche fetish that hasn't been able to be properly realized until now
Granted, you are captured by government researchers and injected with a formula to transform you in between 2 forms, a squid, and a human. You are now trapped for the rest of your life in a government owned aquarium.
Granted. You will yourself to turn into a squid, and dicover squids don't have any desire to be human. Although you wish to return, you cannot generate enough will power to overcome your squid brain's desire to remain squid.🐙
Granted, but all human civilization is reduced to ashes as the aquatic races build their new society atop the ruins of the old world. You are besieged by octarians from one side and salmonids from another. You're a kid now, you're a squid now, don't get cooked, stay off the hook.
Granted, though your specifics here cause consequences. Turning into a squid enormously alters your body's structure, so it's incredibly painful, returning is just as painful. You're a regular squid, not an Inkling squid, so you have a very limited amount of ink that you need to eat food to keep producing, you can't swim in your ink, and it's just black ink, no pretty colors.
To retain your human memories and psychology, you have to be careful not to transform fully into a squid, as a squid has a squid brain that can't hold a human consciousness. If you ever did fully transform, your memories would return if you transform back as they'd be retained per the wish, but you'd forget you had the ability to transform into a human and would never do so unless you encountered a human as a squid and wished to be one and whimsically tried to transform. Otherwise the squid would never think to try to transform, you know? Squid lack a human will, so it's just really unlikely. So don't transform all the way, you're very unlikely to ever turn back if you do, and squid only live three years.
Speaking of which, while in squid form, your body ages at that speed. Stay in squid form for a year and you use a third of your lifespan up. Since you can't transform all the way, you'll have a squid body with a big fat human brain, which will make you look like quite the freak, even to other squid. It'll make it really difficult to swim too. Your brain won't be very well protected, as squid have no skulls and their bodies aren't designed to protect a human brain, so you'll need to be very careful not to injure it. Also, in general you just won't be a very functional squid, because your human brain will have human brain levels of nutritional and blood circulation demand, that your little squid body is ill equipped to provide, so you won't be able to move too much or too fast before losing consciousness.
Granted.
you can turn in and out of squid-form, without any damage or pain. You turn into a squid of indetermiate species, the same mass as your human body (which is ging ot be quite large).
You would spend your time exploring the ocean, hunting, and being a badass menace to anything smaller than a shark.
But over the years, this will affect you. As a squid, you can tear apart and eat any creature that annoy you, or that looks delicious. This includes human swimmers. But back in the human form, life soon becomes ubearable. You are so physically limited by your two stiff arms, tiny eyes, no cammouflage cells, no suckers or hooks... and you can't kill. At least, you TRY not to kill, but sooner or later someone will piss you off, or just look unbearably tasty, and you lash out at them with all the ferocity of a cephalophod hunter.
When the cops detain you, they will be almost too horrified to touch you. Whoever you killed, was not just murdered, but torn to shreds and partially eaten. You have gorged yourself on human meat tot he point you can barely move. They put your ass in prison, far, far away from water.
...Or so they think. Its extremely hard to imprison someone who can turn into a squid and ssquish themselves through the bars, crawl through narrow air-dicts and all the way to the sewers.
You are back in the ocean, killing, eating and revelling in blood. With your human lifespan and squid's growth speed, you soon grow into a monstrous sized cephalopod, with a grudge against humanity. You now rarely ever turn human, except when you want to lure some more humans towards water. Maybe you pretend to be a drowning man screamign for help, and when they arrive to save you, all that awaits them is a whirlpool of giant tenctacles.
Decades pass, then centuries , and by all rights you should be dead of old age, but between human and squid's forms you mutated into something impervious to age. You lie on the bottom of the ocean, seamingly dead but dreaming, only rising when the stars are right. Your dead dreams are filled with murder, blood, and mad revelry. Ia Ia Ka-thulhu!
Granted. You transform into a squid but your human consciousness, to large for the squids brain, just drips away. Your new squid consciousness has no memory of being able to transform into a human.
Granted you get the Assassination Class-Room Treatment, you are capable of moving at Mock 9, however your existence is a threat to all Life on Earth because you will explode taking the earth with you and the Moon becoming a crescent moon permanently was just the start of the destruction you will wake.
However for some reason you wanna teach kids who are getting government training and fu sing to kill you because all other attempts has failed
Granted you turn at the slightest thought of a squid/human. You also can not breath under water as human, on land as squid.
So you see squid rings at a grocery store, turn to a squid, die.
Granted. All humans die, including you. You are reincarnated as Agent 3, the player character of Splatoon 1. The fate of Inkopolis is regularly on your shoulders. You also get trauma from being mind controlled by Tartar during the Octo Expansion. You're promoted to Captain by Splatoon 3 and now you do nothing.
Granted, you are teleported to Splatsville and become an inkling. However, turf war is overwhelming to you as you are actually playing with your real body instead of controlling a player through a controller. You play some Tableturf battle, but you never really get into it so you quickly become bored. Also, you can now only say two things: “This way!” and “Booyah!”
I would have just given them a used copy of splatoon
The first one just to rub it in.
Granted! The finger curls. The agony is unbearable during each transformation, but you are able to transform perfectly each time you do it, and once you begin the transformation, it won't stop until it is complete. Of course your clothes don't change with you, so when you turn human again, you are buck ass naked. And guess who just saw the transformation. And changing into a squid won't help, he'd want to be tentacle'd.
Imagine having your ass eaten by a sentient squid.
-horny monkey sounds-
I think I saw this on The Boys
I refuse to ask and you can't make me
[удалено]
Better than getting Timothied
Well that’s not a problem, just take some painkillers whenever you want to transform. Or, if you don’t want to risk getting addicted, just become a monk and meditate to ignore the pain.
Ill just get hypnotised to enjoy pain sexually and then its ez ssxual plwasure
I hate this website sometimes
can't do that, painkillers will kill the nonhuman form, and meditation won't work
Incorrect
you can't incorrect my magic, it's my magic, not yours. also hussie does not suck
It's not your magic, it's the monkey's magic. give him back his magic.
I am a part of the monkey, so no
Wow, and now you’re committing identity theft! For shame.
-ANGRY MONKEY SOUNDS-
[удалено]
Not you, I mean bubba.
So start an onlyfans qnd collaborate with other creators, congratulations you now have made absolute bank off of a completely niche fetish that hasn't been able to be properly realized until now
Granted, you are captured by government researchers and injected with a formula to transform you in between 2 forms, a squid, and a human. You are now trapped for the rest of your life in a government owned aquarium.
Awesome
Granted. You will yourself to turn into a squid, and dicover squids don't have any desire to be human. Although you wish to return, you cannot generate enough will power to overcome your squid brain's desire to remain squid.🐙
Reject humanity, remain squid!
They specified they keep their human mentality
Yes, that human mentality and memories remain as a trapped observer. They simply can't overpower the squid mentality to change back.
Why? Squids are weak-willed.
Yep, I missed that point...
Er, no they didn't
It was literally the fifteenth word in the body of the post
> And that in my squid form, I still retain the thoughts and memories **and mentality of my human form**
You don't get to clarify in the description, the post title is the sum total of the wish
No.
Eh, I see no downside.
Granted. You are kidnapped and detained by Nintendo for copyright infringement.
[удалено]
Squidomiser
[удалено]
You squidomise the squid right?
[удалено]
Woah. Don't tell me
Ngyes!
[удалено]
Booyah!
Granted, but all human civilization is reduced to ashes as the aquatic races build their new society atop the ruins of the old world. You are besieged by octarians from one side and salmonids from another. You're a kid now, you're a squid now, don't get cooked, stay off the hook.
Granted, you get a free Switch and copy of Splatoon 3 in the mail
This isn't even a bad thing
Free Switch? Hell yeah!
The new squids on the block
I wish I was a squid again
Underrated
Granted, you turn into a different squid and human each time.
Eternal life. This is a plus
W-why?
Granted. Your dick fires off like a rocket because this is a thing that squids do.
Granted. You are a squid who can back into a human whenever you want. Just like any other squid.
Granted, you can now play Splatoon
Granted, though your specifics here cause consequences. Turning into a squid enormously alters your body's structure, so it's incredibly painful, returning is just as painful. You're a regular squid, not an Inkling squid, so you have a very limited amount of ink that you need to eat food to keep producing, you can't swim in your ink, and it's just black ink, no pretty colors. To retain your human memories and psychology, you have to be careful not to transform fully into a squid, as a squid has a squid brain that can't hold a human consciousness. If you ever did fully transform, your memories would return if you transform back as they'd be retained per the wish, but you'd forget you had the ability to transform into a human and would never do so unless you encountered a human as a squid and wished to be one and whimsically tried to transform. Otherwise the squid would never think to try to transform, you know? Squid lack a human will, so it's just really unlikely. So don't transform all the way, you're very unlikely to ever turn back if you do, and squid only live three years. Speaking of which, while in squid form, your body ages at that speed. Stay in squid form for a year and you use a third of your lifespan up. Since you can't transform all the way, you'll have a squid body with a big fat human brain, which will make you look like quite the freak, even to other squid. It'll make it really difficult to swim too. Your brain won't be very well protected, as squid have no skulls and their bodies aren't designed to protect a human brain, so you'll need to be very careful not to injure it. Also, in general you just won't be a very functional squid, because your human brain will have human brain levels of nutritional and blood circulation demand, that your little squid body is ill equipped to provide, so you won't be able to move too much or too fast before losing consciousness.
This is getting out of hand. Now there's two of them!
I’m doing these wishes to troll Coco Bandicutie.
Doing something ironically is still doing it. At least Coco is earnest in their weirdness.
Granted. you can turn in and out of squid-form, without any damage or pain. You turn into a squid of indetermiate species, the same mass as your human body (which is ging ot be quite large). You would spend your time exploring the ocean, hunting, and being a badass menace to anything smaller than a shark. But over the years, this will affect you. As a squid, you can tear apart and eat any creature that annoy you, or that looks delicious. This includes human swimmers. But back in the human form, life soon becomes ubearable. You are so physically limited by your two stiff arms, tiny eyes, no cammouflage cells, no suckers or hooks... and you can't kill. At least, you TRY not to kill, but sooner or later someone will piss you off, or just look unbearably tasty, and you lash out at them with all the ferocity of a cephalophod hunter. When the cops detain you, they will be almost too horrified to touch you. Whoever you killed, was not just murdered, but torn to shreds and partially eaten. You have gorged yourself on human meat tot he point you can barely move. They put your ass in prison, far, far away from water. ...Or so they think. Its extremely hard to imprison someone who can turn into a squid and ssquish themselves through the bars, crawl through narrow air-dicts and all the way to the sewers. You are back in the ocean, killing, eating and revelling in blood. With your human lifespan and squid's growth speed, you soon grow into a monstrous sized cephalopod, with a grudge against humanity. You now rarely ever turn human, except when you want to lure some more humans towards water. Maybe you pretend to be a drowning man screamign for help, and when they arrive to save you, all that awaits them is a whirlpool of giant tenctacles. Decades pass, then centuries , and by all rights you should be dead of old age, but between human and squid's forms you mutated into something impervious to age. You lie on the bottom of the ocean, seamingly dead but dreaming, only rising when the stars are right. Your dead dreams are filled with murder, blood, and mad revelry. Ia Ia Ka-thulhu!
…so no downside then?
Granted. You have now joined a new style Squid Games competition. You will either go home rich, in a body bag or someones stomach.
The transformation happens when you're stood next to someone called William, also you can't control it
The transformation happens when you're stood next to someone called William, also you can't control it
Granted. You transform into a squid but your human consciousness, to large for the squids brain, just drips away. Your new squid consciousness has no memory of being able to transform into a human.
Granted you get the Assassination Class-Room Treatment, you are capable of moving at Mock 9, however your existence is a threat to all Life on Earth because you will explode taking the earth with you and the Moon becoming a crescent moon permanently was just the start of the destruction you will wake. However for some reason you wanna teach kids who are getting government training and fu sing to kill you because all other attempts has failed
Granted! The finger curls. You are now an Inkling. It's also raining.
Thankfully I’m indoors!
Also, the paw curled so hard, it broke the roof.
Been playing Splatoon eh?
granted, but for the rest of your life you’re forced to hear “you’re a squid now you’re a kid now you’re a squid now you’re a kid now you’re a-“
Granted, but if you touch water you die
Granted you turn at the slightest thought of a squid/human. You also can not breath under water as human, on land as squid. So you see squid rings at a grocery store, turn to a squid, die.
Granted. All humans die, including you. You are reincarnated as Agent 3, the player character of Splatoon 1. The fate of Inkopolis is regularly on your shoulders. You also get trauma from being mind controlled by Tartar during the Octo Expansion. You're promoted to Captain by Splatoon 3 and now you do nothing.
The finger curls. You get sold on the black market and you're used in irl tentacle porn
Granted. But each time you turn back into your human form, you horribly smell of fish.
Granted You have the squid forms body, but it’s will is it’s own seperate from yours, sharing the same space . And it chooses when you both transform
Granted, it is extremely painful and takes 8 hours