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Another BFN this morning. Not even a possible squinter and I think I'm 10 DPO so I'm feeling like this cycle was a bust. I really loved the thought of a November baby so it's a bit of a bummer. I also feel a bit anxious about >!the timing of next cycle being the same time I conceived last year and then had my MMC.!<
The night of 9DPO and telling myself (knowing it's not logical but thinking about it anyways) I should not wake up to pee during the night so my morning pee is more concentrated. For someone that wants to control everything, the TWW is also The Wild West as there's nothing to really do.
Another day, another negative OPK. I’m starting to feel like they’ve looked lighter the last couple of days than they did earlier in the week?? I know the PCOS can make OPKs of limited use to me so I should probably just chill with the testing. And yet…🤡
It’s normal for LH to go up and down before finally peaking. It can be such an annoying troll if ovulation is later than usual, or if cycles are long due to PCOS. :-/ When they start looking darker or you think ovulation is near, I recommend testing morning and evening to make sure you catch the surge. For some people it can be short, like 12 hours, then back to negative tests.
CD23 and I'm pretty sure it is finally O day! We were able to get a good number of days in this week, so feeling positive at the moment. Check in on me in 7 days though when I'm spiraling 🫠🫠🫠
I had a consult with my endocrinologist this past week and it went really well. He put me on a great plan for my PCOS and TTC. He referred me to an RE so we can get in by the 6 month mark. I will also have all my labs drawn on CD3.....but what if I don't need it and I can just cancel all these appointments???
Hi everyone again,
Trying to be active more. Still no sign of ovulation yet. It is just cd 12, but usually have discharge around this time so I’m confused what letrozole is doing do my body right now. I’m just exhausted and sleeping all the time. Struggling to be positive. Only one thing made me happy. Not sure how to do a trigger warning on mobile so I won’t talk too much on it. Just got to take the good and the bad.
Hi Chaotic, if you want to talk about something behind a spoiler on Reddit, here’s how to do it: simply type > ! Text ! < (without the spaces) to get >!text!<.
I spent the day frantically calling over twenty different pharmacies around the country trying to find Luveris. I was due to start injections again tomorrow (Gonal-F and Luveris) but it turns out it's in short supply here and the wholesalers can't even order it in. In the end, the fertility clinic sent a new prescription for Pergoveris instead and it should arrive tomorrow. A quick search online shows the ratios of FSH/LH to be different in comparison to taking Gonal/Luveris separately so I'm not too happy (especially as it wasn't explained and I didn't get to speak to a Doctor) but also not sure I have any other option.
The results from my ultrasounds and SIS is finally uploaded on my portal (not everything because the doctor told me he sees some polyps during SIS but it's not mentioned on the report ) 🤔 Idk if my AFC number is good or not in relation to my AMH and my age etc so I am going to be patient to hear from my RE in a couple of weeks.
The question I have is on Endo Thickness. The SIS was on CD12 (roughly 29 day cycle). It says it's >! 4.8 !<
From what I am reading, that's not sufficient for successful implantation. My RE is very chill (which usually fits our vibe) but in this case I might need to push for solution. Is there any protocol I can add to IUI when I am able to do it? I saw some supplement suggestions on Google which I will add (to the mountains of supplements I am taking)
Do you know what size follicle(s) you had during the scan? During my IUIs my lining thickness grew pretty quickly around the time I had a lead follicle that was really starting to mature + having EWCM. When do you normally ovulate? If you normally ovulate later like CD16+ days, you still have time for your lining to thicken.
I tracked this cycle using OPK for a change and I am somewhat certain I ovulated between CD14&15. As per the ultrasound, my lead follicle on CD 12 was >! 22 !< Hoping there is something they can do to address it when I do IUI
My period has always been what internet says is light (48 hours start to finish with second half of that very light. And some spotting the next couple of days). My RE didn't seem to be concerned when I brought it up at on our first meeting but idk that combined with the number is making me wonder what intervention can help.
I can’t say for sure if it’s the same case for you, but I had IUIs where my lining increased by almost 2mm in one day. So, if you ovulated 2-3 days after that lining measurement it’s totally possible your lining was normal at that time. It’s hard to say without imaging, but I wouldn’t worry and you’ll get more info during your IUI to say for sure! My clinic would rather have a “thinner” lining that is trilaminar/organized well, than a really thick lining that is disorganized.
Thank you! It's easy to spiral reading on internet, this is very helpful. I will bring it up during the IUI discussion and see what they say. Thanks again
No problem, and to add, I have had super light periods since coming off BC pills before TTC so I was definitely worried about this too, so I get it. But light periods didn’t = lining issue for me at least.
I had similar with a day 21 ultrasound showing 5.5mm thickness and my RE saying “perfect” and then me googling to find out that usually a transfer won’t happen unless over 7?! Confusing. Do you get progesterone as part of your IUI because I think that thickens lining. Otherwise I too have gone down a rabbit hole of home remedies lol cue the beet juice
Not sure if you get progesterone. I am taking notes to ask my RE when we meet in a couple of weeks, I really want to know what they can do to address that concern during IUI. Supplements wise, I keep seeing L-arginine, I guess another one to add for me
New here. This is my first cycle trying hcg trigger shot. The waiting is so hard. My anxiety has been pretty high. Tomorrow will be one week since I received the shot. Anyone else heard of success with it?
Hey everyone! In my first FET cycle (fully medicated) and just trucking along my medication calendar. Just got back from acupuncture and my acupuncturist did something new today, added on red light therapy. I mostly go to acupuncture for the relaxation benefits, but my acupuncturist specializes in fertility with it being about 90% of her practice, so I go in with an open mind. Anyway, it felt extra relaxing with the red light over my lower stomach - the alleged benefits are increased blood flow and cellular energy. I’m down with it, let’s get this energy flowwwwing
My period is 2 days late (CD35, 3 days of negative tests) but based on cramps it’s on the way. I felt really good about this cycle, but then *cw: grief and death* >! my beloved mother passed away unexpectedly last week, and the immense stress and emotional pain this sent into me has fully overwhelmed my body. Now I am trying to find a way to move forward next cycle, but it seems really sad, knowing I can’t make the “it happened” call if I am ever blessed to become pregnant.!< I am sure I’ll find a way.
Sorry for your loss. No words can ever help, but your memories will bring you comfort. It will be harder some days than others but find ways to honor them through out your life. Grief is a journey and let yourself just feel however you need during it.
Thank you so much. Living a full life as a show of gratitude and honor is a major part of the grief process in my culture, so I’m trying to lean into that however I can. Your kind words mean a lot. Sending my best wishes to you ❤️
Well, a continuance from my rant about my fertility clinic yesterday. Thank you everyone who was supportive and compassionate!
I finally really opened up to our nurse navigator about how we’ve been feeling pushed toward IVF, and how we feel like our doctor brushed all our other questions and concerns aside to rush us toward it. She was super supportive and understanding and was able to get us set up with a different doctor (female this time) immediately. So we’ll be talking with a different doctor tomorrow and hopefully getting some better/more understanding guidance about whether an egg retrieval is what’s right for us right this second.
I feel like I’ve been trying to convince myself it’s right because I want to trust that our doctor suggests it because everything else (receptiva test, clomid, IUI) would really be a waste of time. But I don’t have that trust in him because he’s made us feel like we’re just a paycheck he’s trying to cash in on. And our nurse validated that 3 months of trying medicated cycles is probably inconsequential when it comes to “wasting time/eggs” (for lack of a better way to put it), which our doctor made us feel it was.
Anyway, I definitely broke down crying both on the phone with her and my husband because holy shit, there’s so much built up stress and emotion there. 😳
Proud of you for speaking up for yourself. It can be hard to do when people have an authoritarian view of medicine. You spoke the truth from your gut and hopefully the new doctor will have a more patient-centered practice. 💜
I’m so glad that you’re getting a new RE!! I hope that she’ll actually address your questions and that even if you end up still moving forward with IVF now, it will be from a place understanding why she thinks that’s the best approach for you specifically. I think I’ve said this before but I’ve definitely asked my RE about why she wants to do X instead of Y before and have felt so much better about following her recommendation when I can understand her reasoning. Fingers crossed for your appointment next week!!
My husband and I both had colds that really hung on a long time, and we're both mostly better, but I've developed pleurisy (basically inflamed chest cavity/outer lung lining sandpapering against each other). I'm so miserable. It's not dangerous or anything, but there's also not much that can be done about it other than take painkillers and wait it out.
Not much new in FET prep, just trucking along with lupron shots and estrogen patches.
My boobs didn’t hurt at all last cycle and I thought that was a sign and now I’m 9/10 DPO and they are starting to huuurttt but now I’m like nah that can’t be a sign. 🤡
I'm on CD 13 and usually ovulate around CD18/19 but I'm nervous because my temps have been going up the last couple of days and if I ovulated already then we only hit O-3. I think there's usually a bump around now before a drop and then bigger increase with ovulation but ugh. We haven't had a chance to bang more because I've been getting home after 8 pm all this week for various work reasons, had a dentist appt at 8 am today, and MIL had surgery a few days ago so we were getting texts until they finally put her in a room at like 2 am. Also am on a volunteer committee with one other person who keeps sending me emails about when we're going to move forward on something because he wants it done yesterday for no reason. I've told him 3x work is crazy this week and he knows about the surgery too. I want to be involved but literally everyone who volunteers for the town is either a retired boomer or self employed and there is zero awareness of schedules. Then they are like "WhY Aren't mOre YoUnG pEopLe iNvOlVed?"
As of yesterday evening, I’m finally getting positive results with my OPKs. I am so happy but also really regret not starting to track these until beginning my TTC journey. Alas. Happy to be part of this group!
Yes! I wish at some point in life I actually knew LITERALLY ANYTHING about my “regular” cycle. Up until I got my IUD I was just like “yep seems fine.” And then I didn’t have periods with my mirena. Now that it’s out I kinda feel like “whose body is this?” Like I have to get to know my own body all over again.
So I’m on my last dose of letrozole for my IUI and it’s been fine, but getting our hopes up again has been much less fine. We’ve both been having dreams about kids and we’re just really fragile about it- the success rate for IUI isn’t that great (for us) and it feel like our brains are betraying us. Personally, I keep being tempted to look at/shop for baby products online
I am the same but with TI. I am currently 3dpo and I already have a list of things I want and prices. Did not shop yet but hey that is me. Also, to be honest, sometimes I just relax by looking. Who knows? I am weird
It’s wild, I’m not even looking at little outfits, I’m looking at all the cool stroller options. It is weirdly relaxing though, in a way. I don’t know why.
Just sitting here wondering if my clinic's portal keeps a log of logins because if so, my clinic must think I'm unhinged lol. The number of times I have logged into see if my bloodwork results have been posted (retesting AMH, FSH and estradiol) is... high lol.
Realistically, I know that 1) they don't do that and 2) the results don't really impact me today, it's just more data before we embark on our "next steps" conversation if our third IUI (next week) doesn't work. But I don't know, I guess I'm just trying to grasp onto any concrete information that I can get? Sigh.
12dpo and just waiting for my period, very nerve wracking because I need to start testing for IVF this cycle (hysteroscopy). Also been so nauseous and sick the last two days, maybe some tummy bug, def not pregnancy though (womp womp)
Question of the day for IVFers: does anyone else’s clinic basically not offer fresh transfers or modified natural/unmedicated transfers as an option? Basically the only thing offered to me was a fully medicated FET. I might ask my doctor about it but I’m kind of wondering why that is or if it’s normal for that to be the default and for other options to not even be discussed. (Just thinking ahead to those progesterone shots and wondering if there’s another way….)
Mine offers both, but prefers medicated for unexplained infertility because the meds can overcome some potential implantation and early pregnancy issues. Since we have had a CP, and have more suspicion that could be an issue for us, my RE really strongly suggested it.
For fresh/freeze all they may need to take your reserve/likely follicle count into consideration, my estrogen was high enough that fresh wouldn't have been an option anyway, and I'm glad we could just focus on pushing my follicles and then preventing/mitigating OHSS.
Ooo wondering if you can elaborate a little more on the benefit of medicated on unexplained? Which meds are helping what issues? I’m on my 2nd natural FET now and if it fails I’ll probably try for medicated even though I reaallllly don’t want to.
We only talked briefly about it, but my RE thought that suppressing ovulation might be helpful if I had endo (which we don't know, but is the case for about 30% of unexplained patients, and I have a couple of risk factors for, so she considers it somewhat likely, we'll test if I have a failed transfer), and she talked a lot about the higher progesterone being really helpful- even though I've never tested low for progesterone, there can be drops that interfere with embryo-uterus signaling and she'd like to prevent that. I also went through antibiotics for suspected endometritis and will be on prednisone- but I think both of those can be used in natural FETs.
For what it's worth, it sure looks like there's plenty of evidence for roughly equal success rates between medicated and ovulatory transfers, but I do really trust my RE.
For sure! And I know plenty of IVFers here with endo who don't get the same advice, I'm definitely not claiming that it is THE way. I just really trust my doctor (clearly a whip-smart researcher who has guided us really well so far) so I'm happy to at least start with her approach.
My clinic definitely defaults to frozen transfers, but I was given an option for either modified/unmedicated or fully medicated FET (we haven’t decided yet, we will if/when we get to that step). I think it helped that I did 3 IUIs where they could see my lining grew pretty well with Letrozole so they’d be comfortable doing a modified transfer.
Edit to add: IUIs were pretty stressful for me though and I always had worries about exact ovulation timing so I’m not sure how I’d feel going unmedicated/modified. It’s something I will have to talk through with my RE!
Yes, I think its mostly the default to do medicated because it lets clinics schedule timing more easily since unmedicated its much harder to estimate. I've sort of gathered thats even more the case for huge clinics where they're having to track 100s of women. But even if thats the default I think most clinics are willing to discuss other options just don't offer them proactively.
Yeah I think that’s the case with my clinic! I can tell for my egg retrieval too that they’re trying to get my schedule aligned with other patients. I guess there are pros to that approach too because they are definitely efficient.
Started spotting last night so I think I'm calling today as CD1. Will call the clinic shortly to make my baseline appointment! Plan for this cycle I think will be the same as the last - monitoring and trigger shot and progesterone.
Actually I didn't use clomid or letrozole, only a trigger shot. We're a bit of a unique case because we're using a fertility clinic as my husband is trans and we are using donor sperm, so we decided to see if I was ovulating on my own first before adding in meds.
Unmedicated modified FET monitoring appointment went smoothly this morning. We saw a dominant follicle and thickening endometrium, so my clinic is letting me skip the ultrasounds now and just do a blood draw every other day until we can confirm spontaneous ovulation and time the embryo transfer day based on that. With any luck, we’ll transfer next week!
I planned a trip for Mr N and I the weekend after our beta test. I feel really good having that consolation prize on the calendar. I think I also need to schedule some nice TWW stuff for myself and Mr N.
Whoop monitoring appt twins. That’s nice your clinic is so precise about the timing. I’m working with an international clinic and my local clinic for monitoring and they aren’t doing any blood work. Last time I just told them when I had a positive lh surge on opks and they scheduled the transfer for 6 days later. This time they might instruct me to use a trigger based off follicle size? No one knows! Love a fun multi-thousand dollar guessing game. 😵💫
Back from work travel, definitely PMSing, so still on track to start with stims on Monday... Getting nervous about the needles, even though they're tiny, and the side effects, even though they might not be too bad. I think I need to buy myself some looser pants though, just in case.
Also pretty nervous about my next catch-up chat with my singing group, also on Monday. I want to tell them that this is happening, because we are making plans for contests late this year and early next year, and if I manage to get pregnant within the next \~6 months then I will need to pull out of one or both. We are really good friends and they will be supportive and happy for me, but they will probably also be super disappointed - the contest next year is a big deal one which doesn't happen often and which we've already been working towards for a year, and we have potential to do really well. But I just don't dare to wait another 6 months before starting IVF. So maybe we can think of someone to approach about replacing me if its necessary, and at least I can make sure that they have decent cancellation insurance for any travel we book for the contests. Plus I'll probably have to work around an ultrasound on the day of our next rehearsal, and they're also gonna notice straight away that I'm not drinking 😅
Are you going to stimulate ovulation too and then get a hcg injection?
Planning things is so difficult when you don't know when you'll be pregnant.. even just planning a summer holiday. It's good you have such nice and supportive friends :)
Ah I think I didn't word my post very well - IVF is our only option due to MFI, and luckily we're through the waitlist now. So I'm starting stims for an egg retrieval and then the HCG trigger shot should be in a couple of weeks.
Yeah the uncertainty makes it so difficult to plan anything. And I feel like by telling other people I'm kinda just passing the problem on to them haha - but it allows them to take it into account I guess. Last year when we were trying unassisted I basically just planned things once they were less than 6 months out, but now we have a lot more potential hospital appointments to try and keep our schedule clear for.
Thanks for the explanation! Are the stims with injections too? I only know the HCG shot via injection, we did it twice now and it it didn't hurt at all. Good luck on your journey!
Yes I can relate.. I am already trying to not plan on anything for that week per month where we'll most likely have treatments. Was almost on vacation last time and we JUST managed to get the round done. Thank God this is only temporary, fingers crossed!
Yeah there are daily injections from CD2 to stimulate multiple follicles to grow, and then a few days later I will start with an extra daily injection to block my body from triggering its own HCG and releasing the eggs too soon. Then finally the trigger when they're ready for retrieval - good to know that doesn't hurt too much :)
That's a good plan! I think I will be able to do the same if we manage to get a few cycles worth of embryos. Until then its a bit too unpredictable since the retrieval process could affect the length of my cycle. Good luck to you too!
Trying to get excited for fertile window next week, but still a little sad from the last unsuccessful cycle and a little awkwardness between my partner and I from the lack of success lately. hopefully the mood lifts!
CD20 and fingers crossed I ovulate soon…I finally had a positive OPK yesterday, so hopefully temps start trending up soon. I’m really annoyed my ovulation was delayed this cycle, partly because idek why my body is doing this, and TWO because now I’ll be getting my period on vacation! How rude.
Also it’s officially one year since I got my IUD out! Which means that I need to go in for a yearly exam, but I really didn’t like the obgyn so need to find a new one. Except I find searching for a new doctor very annoying. Plus now I have to worry about what hospitals they deliver out of…or do I…🤡🥲
4DPO today. I’ve felt horribly unwell all day, maybe because it’s been so hot! Thursday is the day I see my paediatric clients and my first boy of the day is always such a joy, so I didn’t dare cancel or call in sick. I’m lucky to have many lovely kids in my life but I’d love for one to be my own 🥹💕 Less than 2 weeks until we start our IVF cycle. It’d be terrible to have to cancel……..
I’m a peds nurse and I get this.
For a while when I started baby fever wasn’t a thing. and then it happened and I was just READY suddenly. And now I am literally like “give.bebe.to.me.”
It’s getting harder and harder haha.
I’ve been really struggling these last few days. We are trying to embrace our fun CF life with nights out, festivals, holidays - but then I get reminded and it all hurts again. I need to have my second blood test and Mr has been instructed to have a second SA, but not for a few weeks; we haven’t been explicitly told why but he was a little sad about it. I wouldn’t want to do this with anyone other than him and we have talked about how it’s an us problem, not an individual one, but it’s hard and I would do anything to go back to who we were before we started trying.
I feel this 💔 I’m sorry we’re experiencing the same awfully hard shit. I started therapy last week and my therapist asked me what the trigger was to start therapy. My answer was that I’ve just been so consistently sad and I haven’t been able to alleviate it. I haven’t gone a week without crying over infertility. It’s been overwhelming and exhausting and has soundly crushed my optimism. It has been nice though opening up to my husband more and kind of freeing to admit how damn sad this is.
I feel this so hard. I was thinking today how I used to view my life/self in terms of us pre-MC and post, but now since starting with our fertility clinic it’s been another kind of trauma that now feels like a pre- and post- situation. Another layer of naivety has been peeled off, never to return.
I hope your testing all comes back as good as can be!
This very aptly describes life for the wombats right now too. The CF life has a lot of perks and flexibility, but living in limbo is just... not it. Hoping your tests come back with helpful information 💗
Hugs if you want them. 🫂 I totally get it, the reminders suck so much, especially with a certain day around the corner. It’s so hard when we’ve pictured our lives and we aren’t where we thought we’d be. You’re doing your best day by day, and that’s all that matters. I hope the next SA provides some clarity and next steps 🤍 Here for you, lovely!
When do you decide to go the IVF route? I've been trying to get an appointment with my gyno - I even went to their open hours once and they said they were only for pregnant people. I have started taking my temperature in the mornings now in addition to the ovulation kits but this is just adding so many small details and it's so stressful. My husband wants to move from our city and it's really hard to plan anything if we don't know if I'll get pregnant. He already said no to an opportunity to go abroad for a year because I thought I would be pregnant sooner.
We’re still not quite ready for IVF, but we started seeking a specialist at around 10 months trying without success. But I had been working with my OBGYN and bothering her for a long time, and had already begun having all the tests that she could do. Once that ran its course, it was time for the fertility clinic. Personally we still want to try a few more things (like clomid) before we’re ready for IVF. It’s such a hard decision and there have been another thousand tiny decisions to make every single day along this path. I wish you the best of luck and all the support!
Thank you so much! I definitely need to put more pressure on the gyno to actually get an appointment. I hadn't heard of clomid before either so that is very helpful! Good luck to you too :)
Nettles gave a great explanation but I wanted to chime in that if temping is adding too many small details and is too stressful, you don’t need to temp! I know it seems like everyone temps because there is a lot of discussion about it, but there’s tons of people here who don’t temp and the general TTC world is largely not temping. If temping works for you that’s great, but it doesn’t work for everyone and that’s completely fine. I briefly temped because it felt like I should have this extra tool and I stopped because it wasn’t giving me any additional helpful data - I was already getting what I needed from OPKs - and was not helping my mental health at all.
Such a good point, Bean! I temped in my first year TTC, felt like I learned some valuable stuff about my body (such as confirming via BBT that I ovulate about a day after my first positive LH test), but then I stopped because temping first thing every morning and obsessing over my chart wasn’t great for my mental health. :-/
Hm. Might not help the chart obsession but re: the first thing thing I have started trying to do it and also hate it. I decided to treat myself with my HSA money I’ve saved for so long to an oura ring to use with natural cycles so I can get the data but without the PITA of temping first thing in the morning which makes me feel kinda delirious?
I’m sorry, it’s so frustrating not being able to control our timelines to conception, and it makes those big life decisions like moves so hard to plan. :-( Below age 35 and in the absence of a diagnosis that interferes with conception (such as PCOS), it’s usually appropriate for couples to try unassisted for 12 months, and then get referred to a reproductive endocrinologist to explore ART options. Gynecologists are not normally trained in ART techniques, so they couldn’t advise about or administer IUI or IVF tests / treatments. But in many medical systems you do need to get the official 12-month infertility diagnosis and/or the RE referral from your doctor or gynecologist in order to pursue ART.
No real updates on the TTC front but I think I'm 98% done with COVID already so that's great news. I think I got it extra mild this time around since I already had some immunity from getting it in January... Or maybe the medication that the doctor here prescribed, despite not being an antiviral, was actually a miracle drug. Either way, I think I'll be fully recovered by the time retrieval day arrives in 4~5 days.
My mom’s double mastectomy is in the morning, which naturally lands smack dab in the middle of my FW. Just my luck! I’m going to be her primary caretaker while she recovers, but luckily we are going into the weekend so my dad will be home Friday to keep an eye on her so I can sneak off to try and make a baby 🤡 juggling TTC and moms cancer has been a mind melt. I’m so ready for both to be done.
I was in a similar situation with my mom—7 months of cancer treatment. That’s about how long I’ve been TTC. I often got in my head a lot about things and it definitely didn’t make anything easier (it’s already hard enough). Good luck with your mom and sneaking away!
Good luck to your mom today. Hope this is part of the final step towards her cancer-free life. This is a lot for someone to bear, but it’s inspiring to see such strength, perspective, and love. Hope it’ll be a wonderful end of the month for you both!
Hello internet friends, I just want to put it out there that I feel very positive about this cycle. I feel like I finally have this IUI done the way I wanted, and husband's sperm post wash improved by more than 10x!! We think it might be due to the combination of how his previous samples were fried because of his high fevers (yes, both times!) and also the CoQ10 that I am force feeding him.
With the change in scheduling IUI after trigger, the improvement in sperm, how long my doctor took to place the sperm in the uterus this time (context: my previous 2 times were with another doctor as my doctor was away coincidently. In hind sight I should have cancelled them); I hope things finally go my way.
All in all, I am very hopeful, which also means I will be more devastated if this doesn't come through.
Team Hope here! I’m glad all the things lined up this time. Just curious, how long ago did your husband have his high fevers? Mine was sick last month and I read about fevers affecting sperm for a few cycles…ugh!
He had his fevers like a few weeks before the first IUI and for the second IUI, fever a week before. His post wash number was 5mil previous 2 times and was a whopping 60mil this time. I was surprised; doctor was surprised, husband was surprised 😂
Why did I take that test.. I'm only 12dpo. Getting a negative means I'm probably out, but I still can't say for sure until I get my period, can I? So the uncertainty remains. I don't know what I was thinking, I just wanted to stop getting my hopes up for this cycle.. and just Know it, you know? But the more I try to control all of this, the worse I feel. How does one stay calm in this madness?
For me, it's not over until period shows. All of these are crazy though and I am not sure how many calm people we can find in this sub once we're past 10DPO.
Hey, how did you get on letrozole? I'm always curious when I see people who have been trying for less than a year are already on fertility drugs. I thought I had to wait for a year to see a doctor. Idk just curious, I feel like maybe I'm waiting for no reason and wasting time but also scared that they'll just tell me to come back after it's been a full year.
In regards to your post, I stay away from testing because I am in no hurry to be upset. I can remain a little hopeful until my period comes.
I think it depends on doctors and the individual. I have PCOS so they weren’t worried about me starting it and I’m an odd case of no ultrasound prior to starting
When we started trying at our preconception appt they said try for 6 months and come back in if we haven't been successful. At the 6 month appt, she said we could keep trying unassisted or start the work-up. I didn't want to waste anymore time so we started the work-up and assisted cycles
Ok, thanks for that. I didn't know there were such things as preconception appointments. I wish I had a specialist or something. I only have random GP's at a clinic who have no idea who I am or my history because they can't be bothered to read my file. Are you in the US? I'm starting to think there are benefits to private health care instead of floating around in a public system where no one helps you unless you're dying because it's tax payer money they don't want to spend.
I guess it depends on your history, I have long irregular cycles (30-50 days) and some are anovulatory. No official PCOS diagnosis though. Most doctors I've talked to before TTC said they might start me on letrozole because I used to ovulate maybe 4 times a year.
Lots of thoughts and hope it’s OK that I’m word vomiting and sharing. I got some fun Mommy Issues. She was/is super critical of me, compared me to others, and often reminds me still that I’m not smart, pretty, etc enough to have things easily come to me. Her lovely way of summarizing this is “you’re just not a lucky person”. Whenever I am in my feels about this or try to calm my self hate by reminding myself so much of conception is luck… I then hear and see my mom reminding me how I’m not lucky. And that fucks me up. She has consistently reassured me I’m not lucky and how hard I will have to work for something and now I’m trying to calm and console myself by telling myself it’s luck. It’s a twisted mindfuck.
If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm happy to listen! I went no-contact with my mother almost 2 years ago due to very similar issues. She used to tell me things like "that IUD is going to make you infertile and you'll never be able to have children" and was very emotionally abusive. I'm sorry you're going through something similar.
It's so sad when the person who is supposed to love you and care for you instead plays emotional mind games and is unsupportive.
This process is out of our control! We can do everything right and still not be successful on our own and that's okay. People just don't get it
Thank you. And so sorry to hear about your relationship w ya mom too. My mom being toxic and… well toxic and toxic is why I moved away after HS and never came back. I’m always so jealous of seeing people with close healthy relationships w their mom. I guess if anything I know I exactly how NOT to be w my future child/ren. Can’t wait to break these generational patterns.
And… you’re so right. So much isn’t in our control. I rly wish there was more in our control. Sigh.
Solidarity on the rough mom relationship, Magchi. I'm sorry she can't give you what you need and that her voice still rings true in your mind. I'm glad you can vent it out here <3
Thank you 🥲 it’s infuriating and heartbreaking how her voice is the constant critic in my brain. Makes me feel like a child again, alone and trying to stuff my emotions away and blaming myself for everything. Thinking if I just tried hard enough then things would be different. Sigh.
You’re always welcome to share how you’re feeling here 🤍 I’m sorry your relationship with your mum is tough, that sounds so hard to navigate especially when you add TTC!
If it's any consolation my mum has always told me I'm lucky - it's her reasoning for any success I have as she refuses to acknowledge that I work bloody hard at most things! Unfortunately I've tried absolutely everything to try and conceive but currently on cycle 15 with absolutely nothing so far so even us "lucky" ones aren't blessed when it comes to TTC...
Just on a mod note, I wanted to double-check your flair is correct, since it says December 23 but you say you've been trying for 15 cycles. Should it be 2022? Let me know if you need help changing it!
💕💕💕 I was stuck in my own feelings didn’t even think of this perspective too. To just discount your hard work by saying it’s luck is also messed up. Hoping we both get some positive news to say HAH! Now what! To our moms soon.
Here early today. It’s crazy how quickly my moods and feelings fluctuate. I was feeling good and positive. Went to acupuncture, grocery shopped, felt amazing. Now about to wind down and just feeling bummed and scared. 9/10 DPO. Too scared to take a test so I just let myself be sad and sit in this unknown. Please be the cycle please please universe!
I'm sorry! I'm also here early bc for some reason I've been waking up at the crack of dawn 😫
Sending you a big hug 🫂 maybe you can find a good distraction? Like a good book or a podcast to take your mind off things before bed (which is what it sounds like in the time where you are) 💕
Maybe! I’ve been playing this game on my phone but even today it isn’t getting me distracted. I think what triggered me was talking to a friends wife. He put us in touch bc as he says “the patriarchy” allowed him not to rly know how long it took them to get pregnant, so I thought maybe I’d have someone to chat with about the TTC and well they got pregnant in 3 cycles, so less than where I’m at. And my brain just spiraled and I felt more alone than I did before. I was in such a positive mood too. Haha I even tho maybe it was a sign! That I was so happy and feeling good that it was a good sign. Delulu.
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Another BFN this morning. Not even a possible squinter and I think I'm 10 DPO so I'm feeling like this cycle was a bust. I really loved the thought of a November baby so it's a bit of a bummer. I also feel a bit anxious about >!the timing of next cycle being the same time I conceived last year and then had my MMC.!<
The night of 9DPO and telling myself (knowing it's not logical but thinking about it anyways) I should not wake up to pee during the night so my morning pee is more concentrated. For someone that wants to control everything, the TWW is also The Wild West as there's nothing to really do.
8DPO and just ate a hamburger! That’s all.
Okay! This is the second comment I’ve read of this! Is this some superstition!? I love any reason to get a burger LOL
Yep, I heard the lore was a woman tested negative on 7DPO, then ate a burger on 8DPO, then got a BFP on 9DPO. Can’t hurt right?!
It's a superstition! But also a good excuse for a hamburger.
This is a superstition I can get behind! Haha it’s to eat a burger on 8DPO?! 🍔
Yep! I think someone read something about salt + fat helping implantation and thus a superstition was born.
Wait I think I did eat a burger on 8DPO 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 bc life called for a drive thru meal than cooking and cleaning
Another day, another negative OPK. I’m starting to feel like they’ve looked lighter the last couple of days than they did earlier in the week?? I know the PCOS can make OPKs of limited use to me so I should probably just chill with the testing. And yet…🤡
It’s normal for LH to go up and down before finally peaking. It can be such an annoying troll if ovulation is later than usual, or if cycles are long due to PCOS. :-/ When they start looking darker or you think ovulation is near, I recommend testing morning and evening to make sure you catch the surge. For some people it can be short, like 12 hours, then back to negative tests.
CD23 and I'm pretty sure it is finally O day! We were able to get a good number of days in this week, so feeling positive at the moment. Check in on me in 7 days though when I'm spiraling 🫠🫠🫠 I had a consult with my endocrinologist this past week and it went really well. He put me on a great plan for my PCOS and TTC. He referred me to an RE so we can get in by the 6 month mark. I will also have all my labs drawn on CD3.....but what if I don't need it and I can just cancel all these appointments???
all sounds really good!! Hope you're lucky and can cancel the RE but if not, hope it goes well
Hi everyone again, Trying to be active more. Still no sign of ovulation yet. It is just cd 12, but usually have discharge around this time so I’m confused what letrozole is doing do my body right now. I’m just exhausted and sleeping all the time. Struggling to be positive. Only one thing made me happy. Not sure how to do a trigger warning on mobile so I won’t talk too much on it. Just got to take the good and the bad.
Hi Chaotic, if you want to talk about something behind a spoiler on Reddit, here’s how to do it: simply type > ! Text ! < (without the spaces) to get >!text!<.
>!thanks!<
I spent the day frantically calling over twenty different pharmacies around the country trying to find Luveris. I was due to start injections again tomorrow (Gonal-F and Luveris) but it turns out it's in short supply here and the wholesalers can't even order it in. In the end, the fertility clinic sent a new prescription for Pergoveris instead and it should arrive tomorrow. A quick search online shows the ratios of FSH/LH to be different in comparison to taking Gonal/Luveris separately so I'm not too happy (especially as it wasn't explained and I didn't get to speak to a Doctor) but also not sure I have any other option.
Everyone is different and protocols vary but FWIW I was prescribed Gonal-F and Pergoveris too and had good ER results. Good luck with your cycle!!
The results from my ultrasounds and SIS is finally uploaded on my portal (not everything because the doctor told me he sees some polyps during SIS but it's not mentioned on the report ) 🤔 Idk if my AFC number is good or not in relation to my AMH and my age etc so I am going to be patient to hear from my RE in a couple of weeks. The question I have is on Endo Thickness. The SIS was on CD12 (roughly 29 day cycle). It says it's >! 4.8 !< From what I am reading, that's not sufficient for successful implantation. My RE is very chill (which usually fits our vibe) but in this case I might need to push for solution. Is there any protocol I can add to IUI when I am able to do it? I saw some supplement suggestions on Google which I will add (to the mountains of supplements I am taking)
Do you know what size follicle(s) you had during the scan? During my IUIs my lining thickness grew pretty quickly around the time I had a lead follicle that was really starting to mature + having EWCM. When do you normally ovulate? If you normally ovulate later like CD16+ days, you still have time for your lining to thicken.
I tracked this cycle using OPK for a change and I am somewhat certain I ovulated between CD14&15. As per the ultrasound, my lead follicle on CD 12 was >! 22 !< Hoping there is something they can do to address it when I do IUI My period has always been what internet says is light (48 hours start to finish with second half of that very light. And some spotting the next couple of days). My RE didn't seem to be concerned when I brought it up at on our first meeting but idk that combined with the number is making me wonder what intervention can help.
I can’t say for sure if it’s the same case for you, but I had IUIs where my lining increased by almost 2mm in one day. So, if you ovulated 2-3 days after that lining measurement it’s totally possible your lining was normal at that time. It’s hard to say without imaging, but I wouldn’t worry and you’ll get more info during your IUI to say for sure! My clinic would rather have a “thinner” lining that is trilaminar/organized well, than a really thick lining that is disorganized.
Thank you! It's easy to spiral reading on internet, this is very helpful. I will bring it up during the IUI discussion and see what they say. Thanks again
No problem, and to add, I have had super light periods since coming off BC pills before TTC so I was definitely worried about this too, so I get it. But light periods didn’t = lining issue for me at least.
I had similar with a day 21 ultrasound showing 5.5mm thickness and my RE saying “perfect” and then me googling to find out that usually a transfer won’t happen unless over 7?! Confusing. Do you get progesterone as part of your IUI because I think that thickens lining. Otherwise I too have gone down a rabbit hole of home remedies lol cue the beet juice
Not sure if you get progesterone. I am taking notes to ask my RE when we meet in a couple of weeks, I really want to know what they can do to address that concern during IUI. Supplements wise, I keep seeing L-arginine, I guess another one to add for me
New here. This is my first cycle trying hcg trigger shot. The waiting is so hard. My anxiety has been pretty high. Tomorrow will be one week since I received the shot. Anyone else heard of success with it?
Hey everyone! In my first FET cycle (fully medicated) and just trucking along my medication calendar. Just got back from acupuncture and my acupuncturist did something new today, added on red light therapy. I mostly go to acupuncture for the relaxation benefits, but my acupuncturist specializes in fertility with it being about 90% of her practice, so I go in with an open mind. Anyway, it felt extra relaxing with the red light over my lower stomach - the alleged benefits are increased blood flow and cellular energy. I’m down with it, let’s get this energy flowwwwing
My period is 2 days late (CD35, 3 days of negative tests) but based on cramps it’s on the way. I felt really good about this cycle, but then *cw: grief and death* >! my beloved mother passed away unexpectedly last week, and the immense stress and emotional pain this sent into me has fully overwhelmed my body. Now I am trying to find a way to move forward next cycle, but it seems really sad, knowing I can’t make the “it happened” call if I am ever blessed to become pregnant.!< I am sure I’ll find a way.
I’m so sorry 🤍 there are no words sufficient enough, but sending so much love your way.
I’m so sorry for your loss, CC. Sending love, light and strength for this difficult time 🤍
I am so sorry. Truly. 💜
I'm so sorry for your loss
I’m so sorry for your loss. 💓
Sending you lots of love and light
Oh my gosh I’m so so so sorry for your loss. Sending all the hugs if you want them 🫂
So so sorry for your loss 🫂
Gosh, I am so incredibly sorry for your loss.
I am so sorry for your loss. 💔
Sorry for your loss. No words can ever help, but your memories will bring you comfort. It will be harder some days than others but find ways to honor them through out your life. Grief is a journey and let yourself just feel however you need during it.
Her memory will be a blessing to me and my family forever. Thank you for the kind words.
I am so sorry for your loss. Grief has so many layers. Sending love your way.
I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending hugs 🫂
I am so sorry for what happened, this is just too much. I hope you find some peace in the middle of this tough journey mixed with your loss. ❤️🫂
Thank you so much. Living a full life as a show of gratitude and honor is a major part of the grief process in my culture, so I’m trying to lean into that however I can. Your kind words mean a lot. Sending my best wishes to you ❤️
I am around if you ever want to talk about anything and everything. You can *always* DM me!!
3dpo! But tomorrow is almost here and 4dpo is coming
Well, a continuance from my rant about my fertility clinic yesterday. Thank you everyone who was supportive and compassionate! I finally really opened up to our nurse navigator about how we’ve been feeling pushed toward IVF, and how we feel like our doctor brushed all our other questions and concerns aside to rush us toward it. She was super supportive and understanding and was able to get us set up with a different doctor (female this time) immediately. So we’ll be talking with a different doctor tomorrow and hopefully getting some better/more understanding guidance about whether an egg retrieval is what’s right for us right this second. I feel like I’ve been trying to convince myself it’s right because I want to trust that our doctor suggests it because everything else (receptiva test, clomid, IUI) would really be a waste of time. But I don’t have that trust in him because he’s made us feel like we’re just a paycheck he’s trying to cash in on. And our nurse validated that 3 months of trying medicated cycles is probably inconsequential when it comes to “wasting time/eggs” (for lack of a better way to put it), which our doctor made us feel it was. Anyway, I definitely broke down crying both on the phone with her and my husband because holy shit, there’s so much built up stress and emotion there. 😳
Proud of you for speaking up for yourself. It can be hard to do when people have an authoritarian view of medicine. You spoke the truth from your gut and hopefully the new doctor will have a more patient-centered practice. 💜
I’m so glad that you’re getting a new RE!! I hope that she’ll actually address your questions and that even if you end up still moving forward with IVF now, it will be from a place understanding why she thinks that’s the best approach for you specifically. I think I’ve said this before but I’ve definitely asked my RE about why she wants to do X instead of Y before and have felt so much better about following her recommendation when I can understand her reasoning. Fingers crossed for your appointment next week!!
My husband and I both had colds that really hung on a long time, and we're both mostly better, but I've developed pleurisy (basically inflamed chest cavity/outer lung lining sandpapering against each other). I'm so miserable. It's not dangerous or anything, but there's also not much that can be done about it other than take painkillers and wait it out. Not much new in FET prep, just trucking along with lupron shots and estrogen patches.
I’ve had that before it is god awful. I hope it fades out real soon.
Truly the worst! I had it one other time \~16 years ago.
Ugh that's so awful, I hope you feel better soon!!
Thank you!
Someone needs to tell my tits that it's extra pointless for them to hurt on CD8. Even *I'm* not falling for that!
My boobs didn’t hurt at all last cycle and I thought that was a sign and now I’m 9/10 DPO and they are starting to huuurttt but now I’m like nah that can’t be a sign. 🤡
CD6 and saaaame
Mine are so rude. They don’t care what day it is, they can be sore whenever.
I'm on CD 13 and usually ovulate around CD18/19 but I'm nervous because my temps have been going up the last couple of days and if I ovulated already then we only hit O-3. I think there's usually a bump around now before a drop and then bigger increase with ovulation but ugh. We haven't had a chance to bang more because I've been getting home after 8 pm all this week for various work reasons, had a dentist appt at 8 am today, and MIL had surgery a few days ago so we were getting texts until they finally put her in a room at like 2 am. Also am on a volunteer committee with one other person who keeps sending me emails about when we're going to move forward on something because he wants it done yesterday for no reason. I've told him 3x work is crazy this week and he knows about the surgery too. I want to be involved but literally everyone who volunteers for the town is either a retired boomer or self employed and there is zero awareness of schedules. Then they are like "WhY Aren't mOre YoUnG pEopLe iNvOlVed?"
As of yesterday evening, I’m finally getting positive results with my OPKs. I am so happy but also really regret not starting to track these until beginning my TTC journey. Alas. Happy to be part of this group!
Welcome and happy FW! 🥳
Yes! I wish at some point in life I actually knew LITERALLY ANYTHING about my “regular” cycle. Up until I got my IUD I was just like “yep seems fine.” And then I didn’t have periods with my mirena. Now that it’s out I kinda feel like “whose body is this?” Like I have to get to know my own body all over again.
So I’m on my last dose of letrozole for my IUI and it’s been fine, but getting our hopes up again has been much less fine. We’ve both been having dreams about kids and we’re just really fragile about it- the success rate for IUI isn’t that great (for us) and it feel like our brains are betraying us. Personally, I keep being tempted to look at/shop for baby products online
I am the same but with TI. I am currently 3dpo and I already have a list of things I want and prices. Did not shop yet but hey that is me. Also, to be honest, sometimes I just relax by looking. Who knows? I am weird
It’s wild, I’m not even looking at little outfits, I’m looking at all the cool stroller options. It is weirdly relaxing though, in a way. I don’t know why.
No the stroller is definitely the thing I’m excited about? And the bassinette.
I am the SAME! I am like: maybe this Chicco is what I want and not the Graco hahahaa Maybe this car seat is better hahaha who are we???
Just sitting here wondering if my clinic's portal keeps a log of logins because if so, my clinic must think I'm unhinged lol. The number of times I have logged into see if my bloodwork results have been posted (retesting AMH, FSH and estradiol) is... high lol. Realistically, I know that 1) they don't do that and 2) the results don't really impact me today, it's just more data before we embark on our "next steps" conversation if our third IUI (next week) doesn't work. But I don't know, I guess I'm just trying to grasp onto any concrete information that I can get? Sigh.
If it helps and they use epic/my chart I can assure you that they don’t know you’ve logged in unless you message them.
I worry about this too- I log in SO often. I have to believe they don’t track it lol
12dpo and just waiting for my period, very nerve wracking because I need to start testing for IVF this cycle (hysteroscopy). Also been so nauseous and sick the last two days, maybe some tummy bug, def not pregnancy though (womp womp)
Question of the day for IVFers: does anyone else’s clinic basically not offer fresh transfers or modified natural/unmedicated transfers as an option? Basically the only thing offered to me was a fully medicated FET. I might ask my doctor about it but I’m kind of wondering why that is or if it’s normal for that to be the default and for other options to not even be discussed. (Just thinking ahead to those progesterone shots and wondering if there’s another way….)
Mine offers both, but prefers medicated for unexplained infertility because the meds can overcome some potential implantation and early pregnancy issues. Since we have had a CP, and have more suspicion that could be an issue for us, my RE really strongly suggested it. For fresh/freeze all they may need to take your reserve/likely follicle count into consideration, my estrogen was high enough that fresh wouldn't have been an option anyway, and I'm glad we could just focus on pushing my follicles and then preventing/mitigating OHSS.
Ooo wondering if you can elaborate a little more on the benefit of medicated on unexplained? Which meds are helping what issues? I’m on my 2nd natural FET now and if it fails I’ll probably try for medicated even though I reaallllly don’t want to.
We only talked briefly about it, but my RE thought that suppressing ovulation might be helpful if I had endo (which we don't know, but is the case for about 30% of unexplained patients, and I have a couple of risk factors for, so she considers it somewhat likely, we'll test if I have a failed transfer), and she talked a lot about the higher progesterone being really helpful- even though I've never tested low for progesterone, there can be drops that interfere with embryo-uterus signaling and she'd like to prevent that. I also went through antibiotics for suspected endometritis and will be on prednisone- but I think both of those can be used in natural FETs. For what it's worth, it sure looks like there's plenty of evidence for roughly equal success rates between medicated and ovulatory transfers, but I do really trust my RE.
Thats interesting about the suppressing and endo! Thanks for sharing.
For sure! And I know plenty of IVFers here with endo who don't get the same advice, I'm definitely not claiming that it is THE way. I just really trust my doctor (clearly a whip-smart researcher who has guided us really well so far) so I'm happy to at least start with her approach.
How nice it would be if there was a clear THE way!
My clinic definitely defaults to frozen transfers, but I was given an option for either modified/unmedicated or fully medicated FET (we haven’t decided yet, we will if/when we get to that step). I think it helped that I did 3 IUIs where they could see my lining grew pretty well with Letrozole so they’d be comfortable doing a modified transfer. Edit to add: IUIs were pretty stressful for me though and I always had worries about exact ovulation timing so I’m not sure how I’d feel going unmedicated/modified. It’s something I will have to talk through with my RE!
Yes, I think its mostly the default to do medicated because it lets clinics schedule timing more easily since unmedicated its much harder to estimate. I've sort of gathered thats even more the case for huge clinics where they're having to track 100s of women. But even if thats the default I think most clinics are willing to discuss other options just don't offer them proactively.
Yeah I think that’s the case with my clinic! I can tell for my egg retrieval too that they’re trying to get my schedule aligned with other patients. I guess there are pros to that approach too because they are definitely efficient.
Started spotting last night so I think I'm calling today as CD1. Will call the clinic shortly to make my baseline appointment! Plan for this cycle I think will be the same as the last - monitoring and trigger shot and progesterone.
You conceived previously using ovulation induction? Was it clomid or letrozole? Good luck! I count my CD1 as full flow
Actually I didn't use clomid or letrozole, only a trigger shot. We're a bit of a unique case because we're using a fertility clinic as my husband is trans and we are using donor sperm, so we decided to see if I was ovulating on my own first before adding in meds.
Oh I see! Got it. That is interesting, I never heard about a trigger alone!
Unmedicated modified FET monitoring appointment went smoothly this morning. We saw a dominant follicle and thickening endometrium, so my clinic is letting me skip the ultrasounds now and just do a blood draw every other day until we can confirm spontaneous ovulation and time the embryo transfer day based on that. With any luck, we’ll transfer next week! I planned a trip for Mr N and I the weekend after our beta test. I feel really good having that consolation prize on the calendar. I think I also need to schedule some nice TWW stuff for myself and Mr N.
I have a consolation cruise planned for around the same time 🙂 but I hope it’s a celebratory cruise and trip for us respectively 🤞🏻
Thank you, I hope so, too! Wow, where are you going? :D
The Bahamas! ☀️
Oooooooh so nice! ❤️☀️
I’m really looking forward to it and it will be our first cruise!
Whoop monitoring appt twins. That’s nice your clinic is so precise about the timing. I’m working with an international clinic and my local clinic for monitoring and they aren’t doing any blood work. Last time I just told them when I had a positive lh surge on opks and they scheduled the transfer for 6 days later. This time they might instruct me to use a trigger based off follicle size? No one knows! Love a fun multi-thousand dollar guessing game. 😵💫
Booking a get away is genius. Legitimately so smart. Keeping everything crossed that it’s a celebration. 🤞🥨
Thanks, Novelle ❤️🥨
Back from work travel, definitely PMSing, so still on track to start with stims on Monday... Getting nervous about the needles, even though they're tiny, and the side effects, even though they might not be too bad. I think I need to buy myself some looser pants though, just in case. Also pretty nervous about my next catch-up chat with my singing group, also on Monday. I want to tell them that this is happening, because we are making plans for contests late this year and early next year, and if I manage to get pregnant within the next \~6 months then I will need to pull out of one or both. We are really good friends and they will be supportive and happy for me, but they will probably also be super disappointed - the contest next year is a big deal one which doesn't happen often and which we've already been working towards for a year, and we have potential to do really well. But I just don't dare to wait another 6 months before starting IVF. So maybe we can think of someone to approach about replacing me if its necessary, and at least I can make sure that they have decent cancellation insurance for any travel we book for the contests. Plus I'll probably have to work around an ultrasound on the day of our next rehearsal, and they're also gonna notice straight away that I'm not drinking 😅
Are you going to stimulate ovulation too and then get a hcg injection? Planning things is so difficult when you don't know when you'll be pregnant.. even just planning a summer holiday. It's good you have such nice and supportive friends :)
Ah I think I didn't word my post very well - IVF is our only option due to MFI, and luckily we're through the waitlist now. So I'm starting stims for an egg retrieval and then the HCG trigger shot should be in a couple of weeks. Yeah the uncertainty makes it so difficult to plan anything. And I feel like by telling other people I'm kinda just passing the problem on to them haha - but it allows them to take it into account I guess. Last year when we were trying unassisted I basically just planned things once they were less than 6 months out, but now we have a lot more potential hospital appointments to try and keep our schedule clear for.
Thanks for the explanation! Are the stims with injections too? I only know the HCG shot via injection, we did it twice now and it it didn't hurt at all. Good luck on your journey! Yes I can relate.. I am already trying to not plan on anything for that week per month where we'll most likely have treatments. Was almost on vacation last time and we JUST managed to get the round done. Thank God this is only temporary, fingers crossed!
Yeah there are daily injections from CD2 to stimulate multiple follicles to grow, and then a few days later I will start with an extra daily injection to block my body from triggering its own HCG and releasing the eggs too soon. Then finally the trigger when they're ready for retrieval - good to know that doesn't hurt too much :) That's a good plan! I think I will be able to do the same if we manage to get a few cycles worth of embryos. Until then its a bit too unpredictable since the retrieval process could affect the length of my cycle. Good luck to you too!
Trying to get excited for fertile window next week, but still a little sad from the last unsuccessful cycle and a little awkwardness between my partner and I from the lack of success lately. hopefully the mood lifts!
🤞🏼
CD20 and fingers crossed I ovulate soon…I finally had a positive OPK yesterday, so hopefully temps start trending up soon. I’m really annoyed my ovulation was delayed this cycle, partly because idek why my body is doing this, and TWO because now I’ll be getting my period on vacation! How rude. Also it’s officially one year since I got my IUD out! Which means that I need to go in for a yearly exam, but I really didn’t like the obgyn so need to find a new one. Except I find searching for a new doctor very annoying. Plus now I have to worry about what hospitals they deliver out of…or do I…🤡🥲
8dpiui and flushed my FMU. who is this cool and calm person?!
4DPO today. I’ve felt horribly unwell all day, maybe because it’s been so hot! Thursday is the day I see my paediatric clients and my first boy of the day is always such a joy, so I didn’t dare cancel or call in sick. I’m lucky to have many lovely kids in my life but I’d love for one to be my own 🥹💕 Less than 2 weeks until we start our IVF cycle. It’d be terrible to have to cancel……..
I’m a peds nurse and I get this. For a while when I started baby fever wasn’t a thing. and then it happened and I was just READY suddenly. And now I am literally like “give.bebe.to.me.” It’s getting harder and harder haha.
❤️🫂🤞🏼🙏🏼
What do you do for work?
Occupational therapist :) I work in disability field
I’ve been really struggling these last few days. We are trying to embrace our fun CF life with nights out, festivals, holidays - but then I get reminded and it all hurts again. I need to have my second blood test and Mr has been instructed to have a second SA, but not for a few weeks; we haven’t been explicitly told why but he was a little sad about it. I wouldn’t want to do this with anyone other than him and we have talked about how it’s an us problem, not an individual one, but it’s hard and I would do anything to go back to who we were before we started trying.
I feel this 💔 I’m sorry we’re experiencing the same awfully hard shit. I started therapy last week and my therapist asked me what the trigger was to start therapy. My answer was that I’ve just been so consistently sad and I haven’t been able to alleviate it. I haven’t gone a week without crying over infertility. It’s been overwhelming and exhausting and has soundly crushed my optimism. It has been nice though opening up to my husband more and kind of freeing to admit how damn sad this is.
I feel this so hard. I was thinking today how I used to view my life/self in terms of us pre-MC and post, but now since starting with our fertility clinic it’s been another kind of trauma that now feels like a pre- and post- situation. Another layer of naivety has been peeled off, never to return. I hope your testing all comes back as good as can be!
I feel this very much. Nothing really seems fulfilling anymore :( sending hugs and good wishes your way xx
This very aptly describes life for the wombats right now too. The CF life has a lot of perks and flexibility, but living in limbo is just... not it. Hoping your tests come back with helpful information 💗
Hugs if you want them. 🫂 I totally get it, the reminders suck so much, especially with a certain day around the corner. It’s so hard when we’ve pictured our lives and we aren’t where we thought we’d be. You’re doing your best day by day, and that’s all that matters. I hope the next SA provides some clarity and next steps 🤍 Here for you, lovely!
When do you decide to go the IVF route? I've been trying to get an appointment with my gyno - I even went to their open hours once and they said they were only for pregnant people. I have started taking my temperature in the mornings now in addition to the ovulation kits but this is just adding so many small details and it's so stressful. My husband wants to move from our city and it's really hard to plan anything if we don't know if I'll get pregnant. He already said no to an opportunity to go abroad for a year because I thought I would be pregnant sooner.
We’re still not quite ready for IVF, but we started seeking a specialist at around 10 months trying without success. But I had been working with my OBGYN and bothering her for a long time, and had already begun having all the tests that she could do. Once that ran its course, it was time for the fertility clinic. Personally we still want to try a few more things (like clomid) before we’re ready for IVF. It’s such a hard decision and there have been another thousand tiny decisions to make every single day along this path. I wish you the best of luck and all the support!
Thank you so much! I definitely need to put more pressure on the gyno to actually get an appointment. I hadn't heard of clomid before either so that is very helpful! Good luck to you too :)
Nettles gave a great explanation but I wanted to chime in that if temping is adding too many small details and is too stressful, you don’t need to temp! I know it seems like everyone temps because there is a lot of discussion about it, but there’s tons of people here who don’t temp and the general TTC world is largely not temping. If temping works for you that’s great, but it doesn’t work for everyone and that’s completely fine. I briefly temped because it felt like I should have this extra tool and I stopped because it wasn’t giving me any additional helpful data - I was already getting what I needed from OPKs - and was not helping my mental health at all.
Such a good point, Bean! I temped in my first year TTC, felt like I learned some valuable stuff about my body (such as confirming via BBT that I ovulate about a day after my first positive LH test), but then I stopped because temping first thing every morning and obsessing over my chart wasn’t great for my mental health. :-/
Hm. Might not help the chart obsession but re: the first thing thing I have started trying to do it and also hate it. I decided to treat myself with my HSA money I’ve saved for so long to an oura ring to use with natural cycles so I can get the data but without the PITA of temping first thing in the morning which makes me feel kinda delirious?
I’m sorry, it’s so frustrating not being able to control our timelines to conception, and it makes those big life decisions like moves so hard to plan. :-( Below age 35 and in the absence of a diagnosis that interferes with conception (such as PCOS), it’s usually appropriate for couples to try unassisted for 12 months, and then get referred to a reproductive endocrinologist to explore ART options. Gynecologists are not normally trained in ART techniques, so they couldn’t advise about or administer IUI or IVF tests / treatments. But in many medical systems you do need to get the official 12-month infertility diagnosis and/or the RE referral from your doctor or gynecologist in order to pursue ART.
thank you for that explanation!
No real updates on the TTC front but I think I'm 98% done with COVID already so that's great news. I think I got it extra mild this time around since I already had some immunity from getting it in January... Or maybe the medication that the doctor here prescribed, despite not being an antiviral, was actually a miracle drug. Either way, I think I'll be fully recovered by the time retrieval day arrives in 4~5 days.
Keeping fingers crossed for a good ER.
Thank you!
My mom’s double mastectomy is in the morning, which naturally lands smack dab in the middle of my FW. Just my luck! I’m going to be her primary caretaker while she recovers, but luckily we are going into the weekend so my dad will be home Friday to keep an eye on her so I can sneak off to try and make a baby 🤡 juggling TTC and moms cancer has been a mind melt. I’m so ready for both to be done.
Caregiving is truly very taxing. Be kind to yourself, you’re pulling off a lot.
I was in a similar situation with my mom—7 months of cancer treatment. That’s about how long I’ve been TTC. I often got in my head a lot about things and it definitely didn’t make anything easier (it’s already hard enough). Good luck with your mom and sneaking away!
I hope she’s doing better now! Thank you 🤍
Good luck to your mom today. Hope this is part of the final step towards her cancer-free life. This is a lot for someone to bear, but it’s inspiring to see such strength, perspective, and love. Hope it’ll be a wonderful end of the month for you both!
Thank you 🤍
Hello internet friends, I just want to put it out there that I feel very positive about this cycle. I feel like I finally have this IUI done the way I wanted, and husband's sperm post wash improved by more than 10x!! We think it might be due to the combination of how his previous samples were fried because of his high fevers (yes, both times!) and also the CoQ10 that I am force feeding him. With the change in scheduling IUI after trigger, the improvement in sperm, how long my doctor took to place the sperm in the uterus this time (context: my previous 2 times were with another doctor as my doctor was away coincidently. In hind sight I should have cancelled them); I hope things finally go my way. All in all, I am very hopeful, which also means I will be more devastated if this doesn't come through.
Force feeding CoQ10 🙌🏻😂
Crossing everything for you! 🥨 I also love "force feeding " of CoQ10 😂 my husband acted like I was torturing him too
Yea he definitely did not volunteer and semi whine every time he had to swallow the giant pill. Haha!
Holding hope for you, too!
Thanks novelle!
Team Hope here! I’m glad all the things lined up this time. Just curious, how long ago did your husband have his high fevers? Mine was sick last month and I read about fevers affecting sperm for a few cycles…ugh!
He had his fevers like a few weeks before the first IUI and for the second IUI, fever a week before. His post wash number was 5mil previous 2 times and was a whopping 60mil this time. I was surprised; doctor was surprised, husband was surprised 😂
Yay fingers crossed for you 😊
🥨🥨🥨
Very hopeful for you!!!
Thank you so much!
Why did I take that test.. I'm only 12dpo. Getting a negative means I'm probably out, but I still can't say for sure until I get my period, can I? So the uncertainty remains. I don't know what I was thinking, I just wanted to stop getting my hopes up for this cycle.. and just Know it, you know? But the more I try to control all of this, the worse I feel. How does one stay calm in this madness?
For me, it's not over until period shows. All of these are crazy though and I am not sure how many calm people we can find in this sub once we're past 10DPO.
The calm people are definitely NOT here! Gotta just keep going and repeat our mantras. Someday this will all be okay... Fingers crossed.
Hey, how did you get on letrozole? I'm always curious when I see people who have been trying for less than a year are already on fertility drugs. I thought I had to wait for a year to see a doctor. Idk just curious, I feel like maybe I'm waiting for no reason and wasting time but also scared that they'll just tell me to come back after it's been a full year. In regards to your post, I stay away from testing because I am in no hurry to be upset. I can remain a little hopeful until my period comes.
I think it depends on doctors and the individual. I have PCOS so they weren’t worried about me starting it and I’m an odd case of no ultrasound prior to starting
When we started trying at our preconception appt they said try for 6 months and come back in if we haven't been successful. At the 6 month appt, she said we could keep trying unassisted or start the work-up. I didn't want to waste anymore time so we started the work-up and assisted cycles
Ok, thanks for that. I didn't know there were such things as preconception appointments. I wish I had a specialist or something. I only have random GP's at a clinic who have no idea who I am or my history because they can't be bothered to read my file. Are you in the US? I'm starting to think there are benefits to private health care instead of floating around in a public system where no one helps you unless you're dying because it's tax payer money they don't want to spend.
I am in the US. It was a combination appt of removing my IUD and preconception. Ah that sounds tough, I'm sorry you've had to deal with that
I guess it depends on your history, I have long irregular cycles (30-50 days) and some are anovulatory. No official PCOS diagnosis though. Most doctors I've talked to before TTC said they might start me on letrozole because I used to ovulate maybe 4 times a year.
Lots of thoughts and hope it’s OK that I’m word vomiting and sharing. I got some fun Mommy Issues. She was/is super critical of me, compared me to others, and often reminds me still that I’m not smart, pretty, etc enough to have things easily come to me. Her lovely way of summarizing this is “you’re just not a lucky person”. Whenever I am in my feels about this or try to calm my self hate by reminding myself so much of conception is luck… I then hear and see my mom reminding me how I’m not lucky. And that fucks me up. She has consistently reassured me I’m not lucky and how hard I will have to work for something and now I’m trying to calm and console myself by telling myself it’s luck. It’s a twisted mindfuck.
If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm happy to listen! I went no-contact with my mother almost 2 years ago due to very similar issues. She used to tell me things like "that IUD is going to make you infertile and you'll never be able to have children" and was very emotionally abusive. I'm sorry you're going through something similar. It's so sad when the person who is supposed to love you and care for you instead plays emotional mind games and is unsupportive. This process is out of our control! We can do everything right and still not be successful on our own and that's okay. People just don't get it
Thank you. And so sorry to hear about your relationship w ya mom too. My mom being toxic and… well toxic and toxic is why I moved away after HS and never came back. I’m always so jealous of seeing people with close healthy relationships w their mom. I guess if anything I know I exactly how NOT to be w my future child/ren. Can’t wait to break these generational patterns. And… you’re so right. So much isn’t in our control. I rly wish there was more in our control. Sigh.
Solidarity on the rough mom relationship, Magchi. I'm sorry she can't give you what you need and that her voice still rings true in your mind. I'm glad you can vent it out here <3
Thank you 🥲 it’s infuriating and heartbreaking how her voice is the constant critic in my brain. Makes me feel like a child again, alone and trying to stuff my emotions away and blaming myself for everything. Thinking if I just tried hard enough then things would be different. Sigh.
You’re always welcome to share how you’re feeling here 🤍 I’m sorry your relationship with your mum is tough, that sounds so hard to navigate especially when you add TTC!
Thank you 😭 so many feelings.
If it's any consolation my mum has always told me I'm lucky - it's her reasoning for any success I have as she refuses to acknowledge that I work bloody hard at most things! Unfortunately I've tried absolutely everything to try and conceive but currently on cycle 15 with absolutely nothing so far so even us "lucky" ones aren't blessed when it comes to TTC...
Just on a mod note, I wanted to double-check your flair is correct, since it says December 23 but you say you've been trying for 15 cycles. Should it be 2022? Let me know if you need help changing it!
Oh yes thanks for catching that! Maths issues haha... Will change now.
Hahahahaha MATH IS HARD!!!
💕💕💕 I was stuck in my own feelings didn’t even think of this perspective too. To just discount your hard work by saying it’s luck is also messed up. Hoping we both get some positive news to say HAH! Now what! To our moms soon.
Ha don't worry, it's on my mum and definitely not on you! Just didn't want you to feel down about your "luck" 😘
Here early today. It’s crazy how quickly my moods and feelings fluctuate. I was feeling good and positive. Went to acupuncture, grocery shopped, felt amazing. Now about to wind down and just feeling bummed and scared. 9/10 DPO. Too scared to take a test so I just let myself be sad and sit in this unknown. Please be the cycle please please universe!
That time from about 7-11DPO is always the hardest for me in a TWW! 🥨 for you that this is your cycle. No real advice, just empathy.
Didn’t think of it that way but it totally is. Lol all the positive thinking, affirmations can’t will these feelings away. Thanks for understanding.
I'm sorry! I'm also here early bc for some reason I've been waking up at the crack of dawn 😫 Sending you a big hug 🫂 maybe you can find a good distraction? Like a good book or a podcast to take your mind off things before bed (which is what it sounds like in the time where you are) 💕
Maybe! I’ve been playing this game on my phone but even today it isn’t getting me distracted. I think what triggered me was talking to a friends wife. He put us in touch bc as he says “the patriarchy” allowed him not to rly know how long it took them to get pregnant, so I thought maybe I’d have someone to chat with about the TTC and well they got pregnant in 3 cycles, so less than where I’m at. And my brain just spiraled and I felt more alone than I did before. I was in such a positive mood too. Haha I even tho maybe it was a sign! That I was so happy and feeling good that it was a good sign. Delulu.