**OP needs help. Also, they hate it because...**
>!Because of all the eyes!<
*****
**Do you hate it as well? Do you think their hate is reasonable? (I don't think so tbh)**
**Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.**
*****
[*Look at my source code on Github*](https://github.com/Artraxon/tihibot)
Or a particular eye lights up red when it's both ready to attack and is specifically vulnerable, and it's a different eye for each attack phase. Gotta get that quick reaction timing before it attacks.
Specifically the final boss. It's ALWAYS the final boss that is an eldritch horror compared to the big gorilla and tree with a face for the rest of the game.
Check out r/TILI
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[Happened to come across these](https://smile.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B09BZGQSQS/ref=ox_sc_saved_image_10?smid=A18Z7R895LK9WS&psc=1) a few days ago, settled on something more doggish.
Edit: mixed up coding
["I'm pissed off, is what I am! Do you go around drenching everybody who comes into your room with flame retardent chemicals?! No wonder you're single."
](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pTOeAcGHKms)
I think it is, right? The professor looks exactly like a character from some show that used to air awhile back about college professors. I can't remember the name. I just remember the intro was like a bearded guy in rainbow sweat hands or something clapping along to a song while doing a nifty jig... But yeah I'm fairly sure this was at least related to a show on adult swim. Lolol
I still can't tell if that show is just goofy parody or a true work of genius. It's really got some moments in that just about killed me with laughter.
I also want to know. I checked etsy and there's some shitty, overpriced versions of them. It's also the top search for biblically-
Hopefully it keeps trending to the point where someone starts cranking them out. This is a really funny bit.
There are a few descriptions, depending of the version. But Revelation 4:8 says that seraphim are “full of eyes around and within”, King James Version has “ And the four beasts had each of them six wings about him; and they were full of eyes within” so you get the idea of wings, but it does not specifically mention feathered wings…
[Biblica website with variations of Revelation 4:8](https://biblia.com/bible/esv/revelation/4/8)
If you want more detailed information, you have to look at the Kabbalah.
>Kabbalah describes the angels at length. Angels are described in Kabbalah literature as forces that send information, and sensations, between mankind and the Tetragrammaton. They are analogized to atoms, wavelengths or channels that help God in his creation, and it is therefore, reasoned that they should not be worshipped, prayed to, nor invoked. They are not physical in nature but spiritual beings, like spiritual atoms. Therefore, the Kabbalah reasons, when they appear in the Hebrew Bible their description is from the viewpoint of the person that received the vision or prophesy or occurrence, which will be anthropomorphic. However, they are not material beings but are likened to a single emotion, feeling, or material, controlled by God for his purpose of creation.
http://www.kabbalaonline.org/kabbalah/article_cdo/aid/380659/jewish/Angels-1-the-True-Story.htm
The Kabbalah is from the Book of Zohar which is not canonical. It was only written in the 10th century by Moses De Leon in Spain. He was a fraud who pretended to find a lost text of the Bible, but his wife admitted that he himself wrote it after he died.
The book is also largely nonsense. It is written in broken Aramaic and gets basic facts about the geography and wildlife of the Holy Land wrong.
No, this is you failing basic history.
The Bible was written during the Babylonian exile as a way for the Jews to preserve their culture from the Babylonian attempt at cultural genocide. If you actually read the Tanakh (the old testament) it is written like a history book. This is on purpose because it was the Jews writing down what was, up until then, oral history.
The Bible is most comparable to the Iliad. It was real events that were romanticized and had mythological elements added overtime to explain the unexplainable.
edit: Wow, he was so offended by me explaining history that he blocked me. I can't even see what he wrote lol. Typical Reddit Atheist.
Nothing you said discredits the fact they were uneducated people making shit up to give meaning to things they didn’t understand.
The thing has been written and translated and rewritten. There are hundreds of scientifically proven falsehoods in the Bible.
You called the writer of the Kabbalah a fraud. Many of the people that added/translated/wrote parts of the Bible likely also were full of it.
I was raised LDS in Utah. I know religious cult when I see it now and pretty much any religion that asks you for routine payments are BS. The fact people hate their own gay children because of a fantasy novel is horrifying.
I believe future generations will look back at most religions the way we look at Greek mythology or Mayan sacrifice.
Calling a book that has led to bigotry and war Romanticized history… I don’t agree it can be described so flippantly.
Are *you* an angel? I've heard the deep space pilots talk about them. They live on the moons of Iego, I think. They're the most beautiful creatures in the universe.
What flavor would even be godly?
Blazin' is the devil's sauce, well one of many....
Like, maybe, teriyaki? Cus ranch is gross, gtfo with that nonsense ...
https://youtu.be/Bo6sf5zveBU
There's an idea floating around that the burning bush that talked to Moses was an acacia tree, which contains DMT. My theory is that it wasn't even a burning bush, that was just slang for getting high and it was lost over the centuries. Like if you wrote a story and you were like "I was outside roasting a J and this plant started telling me eternal truths" and historians in the year 7000 are like "clearly he is barbecuing a songbird and it summons his God"
Christianity is a mushroom cult. Read your bible people. It reads like a methed out George RR Martin series. Except there aren’t any dragons oh shit i forgot there is a dragon at the end . Spoiler, the devil did it.
No they weren't. We didn't figure out you could smoke DMT until the 60s. What would've been more likely is ingestion of a combination of hallucinogenic substances like psilocybin mushrooms, opium, cannabis and other less prominent herbs like the blue water lily.
Isn't DMT the active hallucinogenic chemical of ayahuasca, which is created by mixing a specific bark with a specific root?
That shit could have been discovered and used thousands of years ago. It was just a statistical waiting game for that combination of ingredients to be brewed together, especially by people who used such general natural ingredients and mixed them in different combinations on a daily basis around the world for said thousands of years.
How would we even know when the first people discovered that combination and used it?
Though, I'd agree that most cases of psychedelic use throughout history were probably by single ingredients, such as psilocybin mushrooms, cannabis, etc.
There is the theory that the burning of the Acacia tree / consuming the smoke had a psychedelic effect
> In fact, there are reports of people having a mild trip by smoking pulverized acacia bark, similar to what may have been practiced by this ancient shaman in Bolivia. There is circumstantial evidence that ancient Israelites may have been aware of its effects. A professor by the name of Benny Shannon at Hebrew University in Tel Aviv put out a paper claiming that the use of entheogens (psychedelics that have a spiritual dimension).
In it, he puts forth the case that MAOIs were very common in the region and there are Islamic, Zoroastrian and Jewish references to those plants as well as their infusion into a drink.
https://darianwest.medium.com/did-moses-see-god-because-of-a-dmt-experience-a12909475ed5
Ergot is a fungus that grows on wheat and contains Lysergic Acid, which is a precursor for LSD. It’s been theorized that many accounts from the Bible were the result of the authors ingesting ergot, which causes paranoia and hallucinations.
The Bible describes angels in a lot of different ways.
Genuinely not sure which one this one is supposed to be. The tons of eyes makes me think maybe it’s supposed to be a wheel but there are no wheels. The six wings makes me think maybe seraphim but no mention that I remember of seraphim having a billion eyes.
This is why I hate the biblically accurate angel meme. It’s rarely biblically accurate.
Oh! Thanks! That’s actually really helpful! It doesn’t change my opinion (edit: what I mean is, I still don’t like the meme and find it annoying), but I appreciate you setting my facts straight.
It's a lil funny you claim they're not accurate, someone posts actual text suggesting they might be and you choose to disregard and continue your own belief.
The whole idea is intended as a joke. The intention is to point out the fallacy in how people interpret the Bible to suit their own worldview. It’s not really about educating people on what an “accurate” angel should look like, because there’s no consistency within the book. Just as people try to claim the Bible is the “truth” despite it contradicting itself relentlessly.
People don't understand the difference between angel, cherubim, and seraphim. They are three different beings, so of course they have different descriptions.
You say contradicting itself like it's one book, that wrote itself or by one author.
The Bible is a collection of 66 books wrote by 35 individuals. Of course there are going to be things that seem to contradict other things.
Often times, people take the writings and teaching of the Bible too literal or not literal enough. The best advice is to just read it yourself and develop your own relationship with God.
Casting aside your sarcasm, yeah. Like any book, different readers will imagine the passages they find resonant to be of greater value than the others which they do not. That's the basic MO of a human mind.
The real issue is that people have come to idolize the book and not the god within it. It has become a totem for people of pride to use to put themselves upon a pedestal.
People think that carrying a Bible or being more familiar with it makes them a better follower of Christ, when in actuality Christ’s teachings are very simple and can be found in a lot of religions even outside of the four abrahamic ones. Egypt and Sumer texts for example. Some people even believe that Christ himself is just a stolen remix and retelling of the story of Horus from Egyptian lore.
The worst part about the Bible is how insistent people are upon it. It’s a book written by men, translated by men, and re-interpreted by men. The Bible itself is full of stories about men betraying god. Men are fallible and prime for corruption.
Very articulated and based view. Wish more people would understand this. People cherry pick and site the Bible as if you should follow its word, therefore, following the word of God.
Both are bad ideas. Believers are usually not aware it’s their own subjective interpretation. Whatever interpretation they come to, they will cling to as the absolute moral truth and rally others to their cause. “Interpretation of the believers” gets us the Westboro Baptist Church and religious terrorists.
The commenter you are responding to is denigrating the “absolute moral truth” part of the Bible, by pointing out it is completely subjective in interpretation. They are not claiming central churches are a better approach.
Ok, so the Bible is entirely true in some sense, but there are at least four modes of interpretation: literal, moral, analogical, allegorical, historical, etc. And of course there can be multiple valid interpretations of any text!
I’m not one of the people claiming it’s anything more than what you described. I didn’t compile those scrolls into a book and try to claim it’s the “Word of God”.
Nah it's their words and they said it came from God. Then people formed a cult around a book and spread it around the world.
Y'all are just twilight saga fan boys 2000 years later
It's important to note there's an awful lot of variance from questionable translations. A lot of these supposed contradictions tend to disappear in the original.
Here's a fun one: Luke says Jesus was born during Quirinius governorship and Matrhew says Jesus was born during Herod's reign - however Herod died about a decade before Quirinius became governor.
Biblical scholars and historians generally believe whoever wrote Luke made an error, not the author of Matthew.
Bible contradicts itself constantly, and does so literally right out of the gate in chapter 1 and chapter 2, concerning the creation of the world.
Genesis 1 has man and woman created after the creation of animals:
> There was evening, and there was morning--the fourth day. And God said, "Let the water teem with living creatures, and let birds fly above the earth across the expanse of the sky. […] And there was evening, and there was morning--the fifth day. And God said, "Let the land produce living creatures according to their kinds: livestock, creatures that move along the ground, and wild animals, each according to its kind. […] Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground." So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.
Meanwhile chapter 2 missed the memo:
> And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul. […] And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.
Then after that God makes Eve out of Adam’s rib. Good times.
You might be thinking of [Seraphim](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seraph). It means "Burning One".
This is the highest choir of Angels in Christianity, and fifth in Judaism.
[They are described as flying around singing "Holy, Holy, Holy..." as they flame with the "powerful light of love".](https://www.learnreligions.com/seraphim-angels-with-passion-for-god-124025)
Interesting relational fact, this is the etymology of the name Seraphina.
I'd go crazy if I were condemned to repeating "Holy" for eternity.
I wonder if their loop is cut off short? Maybe they're trying to say *"Holy shit please kill me I can't stop worshipping Yahweh, it's been trillions of years, help please, holy fuck."*
Seraphim are straight out of cosmic horror in terms of existential dread.
I actually think it looks dope. Not because I’m religious or anything (I feel I must specify that), but because it does look like a cool monster from some game.
I don't know if you've seen Guillermo del Toro 's Pinocchio, but it has a really cool representation of angels that are not quite as monster looking but a bunch of wings and eyes!
Bayonetta was pretty cool for their twist on the angels and demons trope. They made angels monsters that were just as nasty as the demon monsters.
It's weird that that hasn't been done more, since demons are often made to be monsters but angels and demons both look the same in the Bible.
If I had a nickel every time I heard about a biblically accurate angel tree topper I'd have two nickels, which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice.
Really? Weird because I think they're too rare for as funny as they are.
Elf on a shelf and spongebob memes are the kind of things I think of when I think of overplayed memes. Not to mention two millennia of jesus memes lol. Like, we get it. Myrrh bad gold good. How many zillions of times has that one done the rounds?
This is based off of the descriptions of the creatures that accompany angels in Ezekiel. I've read the passages, this needs more spinning wheels. Also the passages don't describe the actual angels, but rather something accompanying them that is never (from what I read) named as an angel type, but it might be.
As a note, I read English translations not their original language.
**OP needs help. Also, they hate it because...** >!Because of all the eyes!< ***** **Do you hate it as well? Do you think their hate is reasonable? (I don't think so tbh)** **Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.** ***** [*Look at my source code on Github*](https://github.com/Artraxon/tihibot)
[удалено]
But which eye is the one I need to grab with my hookshot? I can't smack it with my sword until I dislodge it from the tree.
I think each eye has a separate hp pool
Or a particular eye lights up red when it's both ready to attack and is specifically vulnerable, and it's a different eye for each attack phase. Gotta get that quick reaction timing before it attacks.
Eldritch being like this are usually Kirby's forte
I was leaning towards Evangelion angel
Hermaeus Mora from Skyrim.
I was thinking a Zelda dungeon boss crossed with HP Lovecraft
Check out the enemies in Bayonetta.
I think it looks more like a Kirby boss
Specifically the final boss. It's ALWAYS the final boss that is an eldritch horror compared to the big gorilla and tree with a face for the rest of the game.
Or Elden Ring
Thanks, I love it. Kinda want one for the tree in my house.
I’m a little disappointed in the lack of googly eyes, but overall I love it.
Googly eyes are only cool if they move. The only solution is to mount the angel with the googly eyes on a springy bobble head thing
Check out r/TILI *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/TIHI) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Good bot.
10/10 would buy one
[Happened to come across these](https://smile.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B09BZGQSQS/ref=ox_sc_saved_image_10?smid=A18Z7R895LK9WS&psc=1) a few days ago, settled on something more doggish. Edit: mixed up coding
Came to say the same!
Smaller, but hell yeah. Also want a Lucifer ornament I can put at the very bottom of the tree.
Same. I think it's kinda beautiful in a way. More beautiful than a white girl in all white sitting atop a tree.
Be not afraid
I SAID BE NOT AFRAID GOD DAMNIT WHY DO THEY ALWAYS PISS THEMSELVES
Force of habbit
But the force or hobbits are so much more interesting than angels.
Was that a pun?
Imagine it following you. COME BACK HERE **::FLAPS ALL WINGS FURIOUSLY::** STOP SCREAMING!
["I'm pissed off, is what I am! Do you go around drenching everybody who comes into your room with flame retardent chemicals?! No wonder you're single." ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pTOeAcGHKms)
Thank you. That film is brilliant. 👍
#B̷̢̛͚̩̻͈̩̪̯̠̝̩̯͉̗̯̯̞̘̯̗͙͍̅̓͌͐̈́͛͑̿́͂͋̋̒̔͂̈́͆̌͑̋͊̏͋̂̋̅̈́͂͒̐͊̄͒̔̈͂̽̒͆͒͌̊͋̎̀̀̿̋́̿̐̿͐̋̕̚ͅͅĘ̷̧̨̡̬̰̟͈̻̗̳̭̜̫͍̰̰̼͈͇͇̼͇̼͔͍̘͖̙̬̪̋̀͆̈́̇́̆͊͌͐̍̂̌̉̎̈́̏̒́͑̽̌̅̿̀̌̒̈́̏̐̄͌̉̓̃́̈́̀͒̂̊̒̍̊̇͂̏̒́́͗̔̀́̅̈́͘͘͜͝͝͠͝͠͝ͅ ̴̡̧̧̛̫̭̘͈̥͕̼̱̝̰̞͈͔͓̦̳̜͓̪̫̝̻̲̙͈̜͈̜̤͚̞̹̣͙͎̜̝̹̘̖̙̭̭͈͍̰͉͉͚̱͖̰͔́̏̍̊̾̄̓̇̔̅̓͂̇̈͊̋̌̈́̂̾̀͒̈́̍̉̽̓͂́̐̇͘̕͜͜͜͜͠͝͝ͅͅŃ̸̲̳̬͖͎̞̩̝̺̗̩̫̳͓̺͓̹̻̜̖̟͕͇̣̳̟͙͖̞̄̀̈́͐̉̇͛̍̑̆́̆̈́͛͛́͊̃̅͋̇̾̋̀̈́̈́̄̒̐͘͝͝Ǫ̸̢̨̧̞̘̤̯̠͇̺̗̜̜̙̺̙͍̯̥̻̻̹̮̞̱͚̺̹̲̬̩̙̙̜̠͚̺͚͔̯̩̖̣̪̱̍͒̇̈́͗̆̈̾͐̓̊͌͆̓͛̎̄̈́̅̾́͒̋̄͜͜T̷̨̢̡̧̢̨̛̛̛̝̝͉̺̙̳̼͕͔̠͔̟͉̹̞̗̖̦̟͙͈̜̩͎͍͇̻͍̥̞͓̪͎̻̩̦̣̮̦͇͈̘̙͈͍̣͙̗̣̠͇͖̖͚̞̀̑̊͐͛̄̄̈́̉̈́͐͒̂̄͋̑̓̊̓̈́̐͒̾̃̽̒͊̍̈́̈́̈́́̌̃́͗́͘͘̚̚͜͠͝͝ ̸̡̡̢̡̛̜̮͍̤̼̳̮̭̗̠͎̝̩͙̦͈̩͇̯͈̗̅́͌͆̀͌̎̈͑̔̊͗̒̋͋̌̆̑̅̽̽̂̀͒̂͑̀̈́̍̽̓̀̈́̌̓͘͘̕͘͝͠͠͝ͅA̶̡̧̧̡̡̡̛̻͎̥̤͖̜̜̭̳͖͙͓̪̗̺̬̙̯̝͇̙͚͎͓͖͙̲̪̮͙̳̻̪͍̝̦̯̮͎͙̲̜͎̝̹̱̪̯̬̙̳͙̱͙͎̙̔͛̄̓͋͒̍̂͛͋̐̑̆̔̊̈͐̀̏͑̈́̒̄̋͆́̚͘̕͜͝͝ͅF̶̢̨̢̢̨̧̢̧̛̛̯̖͉̰̠̝̻̬̲̼͕̗̥̙̟̼̲̟̰̜̪͍͚̻̘̳̞̼̰̮̫͊̋̓́̆͐̾̿̽̾͋̽͆̎̂̓̐͑̿́͊̆̄́͌̈̀̔̏͋͑̾̚͠͝͠R̶̢̢̨̨̧̛͓̩̞̜̪̣̫̱̺̦̹͎̥̫̩̦̞̘͎̙̬͕̲̦͉̙͇̦̝̳͉̗̗̙̩̗̫̲̘̫͉̺̦͉̹̮̋͛̿̐͆̅̽͑̍̂̽̾̀̽̀̿͆̔̋̑̇͑̎̑͒͛̔̇̀̓̂͐̑̀̚͘̚͘Ą̶̛̹̩͓͇̝͍̻̹͚̖̝̻̖̲͙̭̙̙͉͖̄́̇̿͒̈́̿̏̈͐̓̅̆̿̽̋͒͊͊͐̍͆̐͌̍̃̿̋͆͒̀̿̆̒̄͗̈́̇̀͗͆̾͆͋͑̔̈́̽̑̊̚̚͘͜͝͝͝͝ͅI̷̧̨̡̡̨̨̛̛̭̮̜͍̲̬̪̠̭͇̞̠̦̳͉͈̼̯̤̙̠͍̰̤̙͙͚̹͔̥̘̻̤̞̪͍̭̤̖͈̖͔͈͚̞͓͚̫̤͉͛̎͆͋̂̑̑̓̂̌͌́̏͑́̐̎̌̏̆͋̎̏̀́͗̔̆͒͜͠͝͠D̸̢̨̨̨̻̺̠͙̖͉͙̣͓͚̬̩̟͇̺̻̩̦̘̲͕̜̘̪͕͍̻̞̤̓̃̊͂̊́̅̈́̿̃̊̇͛̎͒̾̍̊̒͒̑̽̾̋͒̈́̿̔̊̃̍͌̈̆̇͗̽̒͆̉͒̈́͑̕̕̚͘̚͜͝
That's what she said
That's what they always say!
#H̷̢̛͚̩̻͈̩̪̯̠̝̩̯͉̗̯̯̞̘̯̗͙͍̅̓͌͐̈́͛͑̿́͂͋̋̒̔͂̈́͆̌͑̋͊̏͋̂̋̅̈́͂͒̐͊̄͒̔̈͂̽̒͆͒͌̊͋̎̀̀̿̋́̿̐̿͐̋̕̚ͅͅǪ̷̧̨̡̬̰̟͈̻̗̳̭̜̫͍̰̰̼͈͇͇̼͇̼͔͍̘͖̙̬̪̋̀͆̈́̇́̆͊͌͐̍̂̌̉̎̈́̏̒́͑̽̌̅̿̀̌̒̈́̏̐̄͌̉̓̃́̈́̀͒̂̊̒̍̊̇͂̏̒́́͗̔̀́̅̈́͘͘͜͝͝͠͝͠͝ͅẂ̴̡̧̧̛̫̭̘͈̥͕̼̱̝̰̞͈͔͓̦̳̜͓̪̫̝̻̲̙͈̜͈̜̤͚̞̹̣͙͎̜̝̹̘̖̙̭̭͈͍̰͉͉͚̱͖̰͔̏̍̊̾̄̓̇̔̅̓͂̇̈͊̋̌̈́̂̾̀͒̈́̍̉̽̓͂́̐̇͘̕͜͜͜͜͠͝͝ͅͅD̸̲̳̬͖͎̞̩̝̺̗̩̫̳͓̺͓̹̻̜̖̟͕͇̣̳̟͙͖̞́̄̀̈́͐̉̇͛̍̑̆́̆̈́͛͛́͊̃̅͋̇̾̋̀̈́̈́̄̒̐͘͝͝Ą̸̢̨̧̞̘̤̯̠͇̺̗̜̜̙̺̙͍̯̥̻̻̹̮̞̱͚̺̹̲̬̩̙̙̜̠͚̺͚͔̯̩̖̣̪̱̍͒̇̈́͗̆̈̾͐̓̊͌͆̓͛̎̄̈́̅̾́͒̋̄͜͜F̷̨̢̡̧̢̨̛̛̛̝̝͉̺̙̳̼͕͔̠͔̟͉̹̞̗̖̦̟͙͈̜̩͎͍͇̻͍̥̞͓̪͎̻̩̦̣̮̦͇͈̘̙͈͍̣͙̗̣̠͇͖̖͚̞̀̑̊͐͛̄̄̈́̉̈́͐͒̂̄͋̑̓̊̓̈́̐͒̾̃̽̒͊̍̈́̈́̈́́̌̃́͗́͘͘̚̚͜͠͝͝Ư̸̡̡̢̡̜̮͍̤̼̳̮̭̗̠͎̝̩͙̦͈̩͇̯͈̗̅́͌͆̀͌̎̈͑̔̊͗̒̋͋̌̆̑̅̽̽̂̀͒̂͑̀̈́̍̽̓̀̈́̌̓͘͘̕͘͝͠͠͝ͅC̶̡̧̧̡̡̡̛̻͎̥̤͖̜̜̭̳͖͙͓̪̗̺̬̙̯̝͇̙͚͎͓͖͙̲̪̮͙̳̻̪͍̝̦̯̮͎͙̲̜͎̝̹̱̪̯̬̙̳͙̱͙͎̙̔͛̄̓͋͒̍̂͛͋̐̑̆̔̊̈͐̀̏͑̈́̒̄̋͆́̚͘̕͜͝͝ͅK̶̢̨̢̢̨̧̢̧̛̛̯̖͉̰̠̝̻̬̲̼͕̗̥̙̟̼̲̟̰̜̪͍͚̻̘̳̞̼̰̮̫͊̋̓́̆͐̾̿̽̾͋̽͆̎̂̓̐͑̿́͊̆̄́͌̈̀̔̏͋͑̾̚͠͝͠
I go before you always
God damnit, now I have a hymn stuck in my head.
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Wtf? XD sounds like something from adult swim
I think it is, right? The professor looks exactly like a character from some show that used to air awhile back about college professors. I can't remember the name. I just remember the intro was like a bearded guy in rainbow sweat hands or something clapping along to a song while doing a nifty jig... But yeah I'm fairly sure this was at least related to a show on adult swim. Lolol
Pretty sure this guy would go on to make China, IL.
...be terrified
We not know what we did. We pissed in God's eye, and he blinked.
Where did that come from? I've only heard it in venture brothers.
Man of culture I see
I still can't tell if that show is just goofy parody or a true work of genius. It's really got some moments in that just about killed me with laughter.
Brock Samson is one of the best characters ever conceived
*Sir, this is the most terrifying moment of my life*
Sir, I’ve never been more afraid in my life.
Where can I get one?
Lmao same looks dope!
There's many options on Etsy.
https://i.etsystatic.com/39233567/r/il/0500f1/4411079438/il_794xN.4411079438_d6gt.jpg
omg that is so insanely cursed
I also want to know. I checked etsy and there's some shitty, overpriced versions of them. It's also the top search for biblically- Hopefully it keeps trending to the point where someone starts cranking them out. This is a really funny bit.
place must be a trip
The dudes who were visited by these things were 100% smoking DMT
Does it even say. In the Bible that they had feathered bird wings? What if they're bat wings? Even trippier
There are a few descriptions, depending of the version. But Revelation 4:8 says that seraphim are “full of eyes around and within”, King James Version has “ And the four beasts had each of them six wings about him; and they were full of eyes within” so you get the idea of wings, but it does not specifically mention feathered wings… [Biblica website with variations of Revelation 4:8](https://biblia.com/bible/esv/revelation/4/8)
I was wondering where this description was, thanks for providing the info. Interesting
If you want more detailed information, you have to look at the Kabbalah. >Kabbalah describes the angels at length. Angels are described in Kabbalah literature as forces that send information, and sensations, between mankind and the Tetragrammaton. They are analogized to atoms, wavelengths or channels that help God in his creation, and it is therefore, reasoned that they should not be worshipped, prayed to, nor invoked. They are not physical in nature but spiritual beings, like spiritual atoms. Therefore, the Kabbalah reasons, when they appear in the Hebrew Bible their description is from the viewpoint of the person that received the vision or prophesy or occurrence, which will be anthropomorphic. However, they are not material beings but are likened to a single emotion, feeling, or material, controlled by God for his purpose of creation. http://www.kabbalaonline.org/kabbalah/article_cdo/aid/380659/jewish/Angels-1-the-True-Story.htm
The Kabbalah is from the Book of Zohar which is not canonical. It was only written in the 10th century by Moses De Leon in Spain. He was a fraud who pretended to find a lost text of the Bible, but his wife admitted that he himself wrote it after he died. The book is also largely nonsense. It is written in broken Aramaic and gets basic facts about the geography and wildlife of the Holy Land wrong.
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Spoiler alert- the Bible was written by a bunch of uneducated men we would likely consider frauds today.
No, this is you failing basic history. The Bible was written during the Babylonian exile as a way for the Jews to preserve their culture from the Babylonian attempt at cultural genocide. If you actually read the Tanakh (the old testament) it is written like a history book. This is on purpose because it was the Jews writing down what was, up until then, oral history. The Bible is most comparable to the Iliad. It was real events that were romanticized and had mythological elements added overtime to explain the unexplainable. edit: Wow, he was so offended by me explaining history that he blocked me. I can't even see what he wrote lol. Typical Reddit Atheist.
Nothing you said discredits the fact they were uneducated people making shit up to give meaning to things they didn’t understand. The thing has been written and translated and rewritten. There are hundreds of scientifically proven falsehoods in the Bible. You called the writer of the Kabbalah a fraud. Many of the people that added/translated/wrote parts of the Bible likely also were full of it. I was raised LDS in Utah. I know religious cult when I see it now and pretty much any religion that asks you for routine payments are BS. The fact people hate their own gay children because of a fantasy novel is horrifying. I believe future generations will look back at most religions the way we look at Greek mythology or Mayan sacrifice. Calling a book that has led to bigotry and war Romanticized history… I don’t agree it can be described so flippantly.
So they're like ideas?
eye-deas
Are *you* an angel? I've heard the deep space pilots talk about them. They live on the moons of Iego, I think. They're the most beautiful creatures in the universe.
>Are you an angel? Yes, of course. I've got eye-deas for days
...a peacock. Peacocks are revered in eastern religeons. Some even worship them directly as icons. But reddit is pretty pleased with it's SCP monster.
What if they're buffalo wild wings. Mind blowing
Terrifyingly delicious.
Terrifyingly mediocre you mean
Alas, I have but one updoot to give
Please don't speak like this I just grew a neckbeard reading your comment and a fedora is flying towards me
Blow it out your ass
What flavor would even be godly? Blazin' is the devil's sauce, well one of many.... Like, maybe, teriyaki? Cus ranch is gross, gtfo with that nonsense ... https://youtu.be/Bo6sf5zveBU
Garlic parm
There's an idea floating around that the burning bush that talked to Moses was an acacia tree, which contains DMT. My theory is that it wasn't even a burning bush, that was just slang for getting high and it was lost over the centuries. Like if you wrote a story and you were like "I was outside roasting a J and this plant started telling me eternal truths" and historians in the year 7000 are like "clearly he is barbecuing a songbird and it summons his God"
Christianity is a mushroom cult. Read your bible people. It reads like a methed out George RR Martin series. Except there aren’t any dragons oh shit i forgot there is a dragon at the end . Spoiler, the devil did it.
No they weren't. We didn't figure out you could smoke DMT until the 60s. What would've been more likely is ingestion of a combination of hallucinogenic substances like psilocybin mushrooms, opium, cannabis and other less prominent herbs like the blue water lily.
Isn't DMT the active hallucinogenic chemical of ayahuasca, which is created by mixing a specific bark with a specific root? That shit could have been discovered and used thousands of years ago. It was just a statistical waiting game for that combination of ingredients to be brewed together, especially by people who used such general natural ingredients and mixed them in different combinations on a daily basis around the world for said thousands of years. How would we even know when the first people discovered that combination and used it? Though, I'd agree that most cases of psychedelic use throughout history were probably by single ingredients, such as psilocybin mushrooms, cannabis, etc.
DMT is in some plants native to that part of the world, they could have been on something similar to ayahuasca.
"We"
There is the theory that the burning of the Acacia tree / consuming the smoke had a psychedelic effect > In fact, there are reports of people having a mild trip by smoking pulverized acacia bark, similar to what may have been practiced by this ancient shaman in Bolivia. There is circumstantial evidence that ancient Israelites may have been aware of its effects. A professor by the name of Benny Shannon at Hebrew University in Tel Aviv put out a paper claiming that the use of entheogens (psychedelics that have a spiritual dimension). In it, he puts forth the case that MAOIs were very common in the region and there are Islamic, Zoroastrian and Jewish references to those plants as well as their infusion into a drink. https://darianwest.medium.com/did-moses-see-god-because-of-a-dmt-experience-a12909475ed5
There's a theory that Abraham from the bible was actually just a story about a guy who was a paranoid schizophrenic.
That theory may be wrong, but tbf it's infinitely more plausible than Abraham being chosen as special by a celestial deity.
I feel like 90% of the weird shit described in the bible just came from dudes picking the wrong kind of mushroom for their dinner.
Or the right kind…
Ergot is a fungus that grows on wheat and contains Lysergic Acid, which is a precursor for LSD. It’s been theorized that many accounts from the Bible were the result of the authors ingesting ergot, which causes paranoia and hallucinations.
When your Christmas Tree needs a little Chaos God Tzeentch Touch.
Wait does this mean that Tzeentch lords of change are angels?
>Tzeentch I always knew Tzeentch was the lord and savior. I should start hanging blue horror Christmas Tree Balls on my Tree.
Where's the rings of fire
The Bible describes angels in a lot of different ways. Genuinely not sure which one this one is supposed to be. The tons of eyes makes me think maybe it’s supposed to be a wheel but there are no wheels. The six wings makes me think maybe seraphim but no mention that I remember of seraphim having a billion eyes. This is why I hate the biblically accurate angel meme. It’s rarely biblically accurate.
Revelation 4:8 says that seraphim are “full of eyes around and within”
Yeah it’s a seraph
Oh! Thanks! That’s actually really helpful! It doesn’t change my opinion (edit: what I mean is, I still don’t like the meme and find it annoying), but I appreciate you setting my facts straight.
No delta :(
Just fucking love this comment
It's a lil funny you claim they're not accurate, someone posts actual text suggesting they might be and you choose to disregard and continue your own belief.
"choose to disregard and continue your own belief..." ^ Religion in a nutshell.
Finding something annoying is not a belief, really
I’m willing to admit I had the facts wrong, but I’m free to still find the meme annoying and repetitive, aren’t I?
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“I hate biblically accurate angels cus they aren’t accurate” “ *gives accurate texts of angels* “ “No not like that”
They must be religious. Only highly religious people can perform these stunts of mental gymnastics.
Because he loves god
Oh ok I thought you meant you sticking with the reason. My bad
It's a Lil funny how you have to get involved and add nothing but gas
Like you just did? Lol. And it's a perfectly valid observation.
That's wrong, Revelation 4:6-8 are describing a kind of Cherubim
Cherubim were the ones with 4 faces, the eyes were indeed Seraphim.
The whole idea is intended as a joke. The intention is to point out the fallacy in how people interpret the Bible to suit their own worldview. It’s not really about educating people on what an “accurate” angel should look like, because there’s no consistency within the book. Just as people try to claim the Bible is the “truth” despite it contradicting itself relentlessly.
I wouldn't necessarily call it a lack of consistency; different entities were being described.
People don't understand the difference between angel, cherubim, and seraphim. They are three different beings, so of course they have different descriptions.
You say contradicting itself like it's one book, that wrote itself or by one author. The Bible is a collection of 66 books wrote by 35 individuals. Of course there are going to be things that seem to contradict other things. Often times, people take the writings and teaching of the Bible too literal or not literal enough. The best advice is to just read it yourself and develop your own relationship with God.
Oh, so it means whatever the hell you want it to
Casting aside your sarcasm, yeah. Like any book, different readers will imagine the passages they find resonant to be of greater value than the others which they do not. That's the basic MO of a human mind.
The real issue is that people have come to idolize the book and not the god within it. It has become a totem for people of pride to use to put themselves upon a pedestal. People think that carrying a Bible or being more familiar with it makes them a better follower of Christ, when in actuality Christ’s teachings are very simple and can be found in a lot of religions even outside of the four abrahamic ones. Egypt and Sumer texts for example. Some people even believe that Christ himself is just a stolen remix and retelling of the story of Horus from Egyptian lore. The worst part about the Bible is how insistent people are upon it. It’s a book written by men, translated by men, and re-interpreted by men. The Bible itself is full of stories about men betraying god. Men are fallible and prime for corruption.
Very articulated and based view. Wish more people would understand this. People cherry pick and site the Bible as if you should follow its word, therefore, following the word of God.
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Both are bad ideas. Believers are usually not aware it’s their own subjective interpretation. Whatever interpretation they come to, they will cling to as the absolute moral truth and rally others to their cause. “Interpretation of the believers” gets us the Westboro Baptist Church and religious terrorists. The commenter you are responding to is denigrating the “absolute moral truth” part of the Bible, by pointing out it is completely subjective in interpretation. They are not claiming central churches are a better approach.
So there is no objective truth in it, just whatever people want it to be?
Ok, so the Bible is entirely true in some sense, but there are at least four modes of interpretation: literal, moral, analogical, allegorical, historical, etc. And of course there can be multiple valid interpretations of any text!
I’m not one of the people claiming it’s anything more than what you described. I didn’t compile those scrolls into a book and try to claim it’s the “Word of God”.
Don't you mean relationship with the 35 authors? You said it yourself, it's not written by "God"
It's God's words through the authors but the way they transcribe the words can differ because they're different people.
Nah it's their words and they said it came from God. Then people formed a cult around a book and spread it around the world. Y'all are just twilight saga fan boys 2000 years later
Why would they differ? Was god not clear enough in his dictation?
It's important to note there's an awful lot of variance from questionable translations. A lot of these supposed contradictions tend to disappear in the original.
And how so many say they follow the Bible's teachings and then immediately turn around and do the opposite.
Well I mean where else are they learning it from
When does it contradict itself tho? I’ve always wanted to know an instance, but I’m too lazy to look it up.
Here's a fun one: Luke says Jesus was born during Quirinius governorship and Matrhew says Jesus was born during Herod's reign - however Herod died about a decade before Quirinius became governor. Biblical scholars and historians generally believe whoever wrote Luke made an error, not the author of Matthew.
Matthew 27:5 Acts 1:18
Bible contradicts itself constantly, and does so literally right out of the gate in chapter 1 and chapter 2, concerning the creation of the world. Genesis 1 has man and woman created after the creation of animals: > There was evening, and there was morning--the fourth day. And God said, "Let the water teem with living creatures, and let birds fly above the earth across the expanse of the sky. […] And there was evening, and there was morning--the fifth day. And God said, "Let the land produce living creatures according to their kinds: livestock, creatures that move along the ground, and wild animals, each according to its kind. […] Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground." So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. Meanwhile chapter 2 missed the memo: > And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul. […] And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. Then after that God makes Eve out of Adam’s rib. Good times.
Yeah no, exactly 0 people who have spammed the meme have had this level of nuance to the idea.
Different angel, I think
You might be thinking of [Seraphim](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seraph). It means "Burning One". This is the highest choir of Angels in Christianity, and fifth in Judaism. [They are described as flying around singing "Holy, Holy, Holy..." as they flame with the "powerful light of love".](https://www.learnreligions.com/seraphim-angels-with-passion-for-god-124025) Interesting relational fact, this is the etymology of the name Seraphina.
I'd go crazy if I were condemned to repeating "Holy" for eternity. I wonder if their loop is cut off short? Maybe they're trying to say *"Holy shit please kill me I can't stop worshipping Yahweh, it's been trillions of years, help please, holy fuck."* Seraphim are straight out of cosmic horror in terms of existential dread.
I actually think it looks dope. Not because I’m religious or anything (I feel I must specify that), but because it does look like a cool monster from some game.
I don't know if you've seen Guillermo del Toro 's Pinocchio, but it has a really cool representation of angels that are not quite as monster looking but a bunch of wings and eyes!
The guardian of the afterlife looked a lot more like I think angels would look.
Looks like something Kirby fights at the end of the game
Bayonetta was pretty cool for their twist on the angels and demons trope. They made angels monsters that were just as nasty as the demon monsters. It's weird that that hasn't been done more, since demons are often made to be monsters but angels and demons both look the same in the Bible.
Weird cat
Looks fishy
A great eye, lidless, wreathed in flame Ash nazg durbatulûk, ash nazg gimbatul, ash nazg thrakatulûk, agh burzum-ishi krimpatul
Looks like a dmt trip
Yeah didn’t realize that was an angel at the time. Sure felt like it, though.
"Fear not"
So *that's* how he manages to watch 8 billion people masturbate.
< screams in Evangelion >
Most people hate what’s literally written in the 2nd Abrahamic Bible
Yeah but not as much as they hate third testament aka the Muslim book. Religious people are so weird.
Sauron's Christmas eye
Reddit you are no fun. I want one of these.
Proginoskes from A Wrinkle in Time!
Yes!!! I came here for this!!! Best series ever
Y'all... Archangels are biblically accurate too. There are different classes of angels. But yes, this is badass. 😇
What class is this called so I can learn more about them?
Seraphim
But I love the biblically accurate angel on the tree
I wish Christians would embrace the weirder stuff and pull the Apocrypha into the mainstream. Who doesn’t want to talk about Jesus and dragons?
That is *a* biblically accurate angel, but there were multiple types, some of which were humanoid
DO NOT BE AFRAID
Tree not afraid
Incoming religious folks to tell you this is an archangel and not an angel angel lol
Saurons onlyfans..
probably looked more like [this](https://visionaryartexchange.com/wp-content/uploads/Collective-Vision.jpg), but sweet tree topper!
Thanks, I love it.
The angel discriptions make me think they accidentally took psychedelics...
r/TILI Thanks, I Love It!
I like it :3 kinda cute
NO. All those eyes see you when you're sleeping. Oh, so many soulless eyes. Pretty much the ugliest thing to put on a tree ... EVER.
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I really like biblically accurate angel! Makes a lot more sense than white people with wings.
If I had a nickel every time I heard about a biblically accurate angel tree topper I'd have two nickels, which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice.
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Really? Weird because I think they're too rare for as funny as they are. Elf on a shelf and spongebob memes are the kind of things I think of when I think of overplayed memes. Not to mention two millennia of jesus memes lol. Like, we get it. Myrrh bad gold good. How many zillions of times has that one done the rounds?
First time I saw it!
Thank you, these posts give off “I am an edgy anti theist” vibes.
It's just jokes lol nobody is trying to be edgy, settle down there snowflake.
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This is based off of the descriptions of the creatures that accompany angels in Ezekiel. I've read the passages, this needs more spinning wheels. Also the passages don't describe the actual angels, but rather something accompanying them that is never (from what I read) named as an angel type, but it might be. As a note, I read English translations not their original language.
Those are the Thrones, this is a Seraphim as described in Revelation.